In this episode, Katie sits down with Brittany Diedrich, host of the Business Lesbian podcast. Brittany shares the stories of falling in love with the cute girl in her physics class, overcoming internalized homophobia, and finding her voice as an out and proud Business Lesbian.
Join us as Brittany recounts her pride journey, teaches us the importance of self-love, community support, and the courage to be different.
In this episode, Katie sits down with Brittany Diedrich, host of the Business Lesbian podcast. Brittany shares the stories of falling in love with the cute girl in her physics class, overcoming internalized homophobia, and finding her voice as an out and proud Business Lesbian.
Join us as Brittany recounts her pride journey, teaches us the importance of self-love, community support, and the courage to be different.
With Pride. For me, it's all about community. It's all about the people that you can surround yourself with and the people that life is a long journey and there's going to be times where you feel on top of the world and there's going to be times where you need someone else to support you and to have a strong community makes such a big difference.
Speaker 2:Welcome to Pride Stories, the podcast where we celebrate the entire spectrum of experiences that make up the LGBTQ plus community. I'm your host, katie Beatty from Tell All Story Co and Studio On this podcast. We are committed to creating a safe, supportive and inspiring space for our guests and listeners alike, so join us as we explore the heartwarming, sometimes painful and always inspired stories that make us who we are Today. I'm joined by Brittany Diedrich, creator and host of the Business Lesbian podcast. Hi, brittany, welcome to the studio. Hello, how does it feel being on the other side of the table?
Speaker 1:It is unusual over here, but the seats are just as ergonomic. Yeah, the vibes are just as good.
Speaker 2:Good, good, happy to hear it. How are you feeling coming into this conversation, knowing that we are going to talk about pride and coming out and all of the beautiful and terrible things that come along with that?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I mean this is kind of my wheelhouse. I like to share personal details and usually overshare a little bit, so, and then I'm gay and ready to talk about that. So I think this is going to be just. I'm going to be at home in this conversation, I hope.
Speaker 2:Good, well, there's no such thing as oversharing here. We want everything that you're willing to give us. So, to start off with, I just want you to tell me and our listeners who you are, whatever that means to you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, my name is Brittany. I turned 30 this year, so now I feel like I'm like an adult adult. Happy birthday, thank you. Yeah, gosh, it's coming up. I'll be 31 soon, but I'm not quite there yet, so we'll stick with that. Yeah, my pronouns are she they. That's kind of a new revelation.
Speaker 1:I always identified just as like a woman, and I still do, but I don't know the pronoun. They feels kind of at home for me, just because I was in the construction industry for the bulk of my career and that is pretty male dominated and I actually loved it while I was there. But it was challenging for a lot of reasons. A lot of being a woman in the industry was kind of watching the show Yellowstone right now, and if you've seen Yellowstone, there's some archetype tropes about women who just have to. Anyway, I don't know where I'm going with this. My pronouns are she, they.
Speaker 1:And my background was at the family heavy highway construction company until last year and then I left to finish up and get my MBA at the University of Minnesota, which I did, which is why I'm a business lesbian or an MB gay. I love it, yeah, yeah. And now I'm just working in my own consultancy called Better Deeds Sweet, and what tell me more about Better Deeds? Better Deeds? The goal is to help good businesses do better, and so the finding the good, making it better, that whole sh feel where it's people who are using business as a force for good, they're paying their employees well, they're helping the community, they're thinking about their impact on the environment, that kind of business, and typically just a small business customer, is my target, but yeah, just kind of consulting with them for whatever pain points they're facing. And again, that's kind of in its infancy too, so I really only have like one customer right now, but yeah, I'm just kind of a jack of all trades, master of nuns. So nuns, yeah, awesome.
Speaker 2:That's so cool. So, as you know, this podcast is kind of centered around one question what is your pride story?
Speaker 1:So my pride story that I like to tell is about my wife and how I got to meet her and how I got to marry her. Is that okay? That's now eons ago.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean you could start at literally your birth. You can start wherever you want, wherever feels right for you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I was always kind of a tomboy, so to speak, Grew up in a family with a lot of boys and again the construction family business had everyone kind of again being in these kind of tropey tropes and we played a lot of sports. So I played football and kickball and tetherball and all of the balls yeah.
Speaker 2:Insert inappropriate joke here.
Speaker 1:Yes, and it didn't stick.
Speaker 2:The balls did not stick the balls didn't stick.
Speaker 1:But yeah, anyway, I grew up kind of a tomboy and went to school at Fargo South and I was in a club called DECA, which is an Association of Marketing Students. So while I was in there my now wife, Chelsea, was there as well. I thought I was straight and so I'd been dating with guys and having a good time and whatever. And so I met her and I didn't really know why I was drawn to her the way I was. She was just kind of an it girl. She was really cool and I was pretty nerdy and still a tomboy, but very nerdy Didn't know how to string a couple words together. So I had known her through DECA.
Speaker 1:And then our senior year I enrolled in this normal physics class instead of an AP physics class and she was in that class as well.
Speaker 1:My mindset was I want to take an easy class because I'd been taking AP, I'd been, you know, trying my hardest to get as many credits and AP credits and all that stuff. But in my senior year I was like I'm going to take it easy right now and so took that class and the figure was a curve in it and I kept setting the curve. And so Chelsea and my one of my best friends, Mike, were both like what are you doing? Why are you in this class? Why are you setting the curve? But it was like the most attention I'd ever gotten from Chelsea, so it was like the best. And so, as the year went on, I kept setting the curve and then, as tests were coming up and Chelsea and Mike both needed me to help them study, and that was when, I kind of think, I won over Chelsea, and so we talked a lot and then the summer after we graduated, we started dating and then that was kind of I don't know, is that a pride?
Speaker 2:story yeah, I mean a pride story is whatever you want it to be. It's whatever has led you to where you are today in terms of you know sexuality and gender, so was Chelsea out at the time? No, okay, so tell me more about that, about you two like supposedly straight, like discovering that you were into each other. What was that like?
Speaker 1:So, apparently, like because we had a couple of classes together that senior year and I was dating a guy at the time and I would talk about the high roll, I would talk about the meals that I was going to cook the guy I was like looking up recipes on all recipescom and being like I'm going to make him lasagna tonight, which is like I don't know, betty cracker 101. And I remember Chelsea getting like a little dicey about it and she just didn't really like that. She didn't really like it when I talked about him. And so later on, after we started dating, she was like yeah, I don't know why it bothered me so much. And I was like, oh, because you liked me and I was talking about the guy that I was dating and that bothered you.
Speaker 2:So can you tell me about what actually happened, like with you two getting together. What did that look like? What were those conversations like?
Speaker 1:It was all kind of that summer, like end of school year, early summertime. I was still dating the guy and we were texting a lot and if you've met my wife or if you've seen my wife, she's beautiful. But she was being a teenage girl who was down on her like physical appearance, which is so ridiculous to me because I'm like you're so beautiful. But that's you know, america is tough sometimes. That's you know, part of the deal of coming of age yeah, being insecure and not yeah. So she was texting and she was saying something about something that I didn't believe was in alignment with like how she actually should be feeling about herself In there. I sent her a long text and it was, you know, a wall of text text and it was just I was like if I was your partner, then I had, and I said something like that where it was like if I was.
Speaker 1:And then the next morning I woke up because it was also the first night that I had ever gotten drunk. So I sent my long drunk text telling her why she was like so beautiful and she was out of her mind to think anything otherwise. And she deserves the best in the world and she deserves the greatest partners in the world and all this stuff. And then the next morning I woke up and I was like, oh, what would you do there? But yeah. So then, after she got that text, then we got together like a week or two later and she just wanted to hang out with me as friends but she and her sister had coordinated and they got me a drunk again, and then her sister and our other friends that were there left, and then Chelsea made her move on me and she kissed me for the first time. And that was when I was like the whole thing was like. I was like, wait, what I had no idea, and then it was from there. She just got me.
Speaker 2:You were one of the lucky few who can say that, like you're, embarrassing teenage drunk text got you married, so congratulations, thank you. Congratulations. So what was it like after that with? Like being in a relationship with a woman for the first time and like sharing that with the people around you?
Speaker 1:Oh, we did not share it with anyone around us for like the first two years. We were like just totally. I mean, chelsea's sister knew and slowly members of our family started to know over the course of two years. But I remember very, very nervously changing my status to in a relationship on Facebook, like two years after we had been dating, and then putting it to my wife or yeah, at that time it was just my girlfriend, but, yeah, people didn't know. And so we Gosh, I don't even really remember how we got away with all that. It was just because we were in college and we just kind of kept to ourselves and we slowly had friend group, that a friend group where they were comfortable and they knew. But it was a pretty small, tight-knit group of mostly yeah, mostly fellow queer people now family friends, yeah, so when?
Speaker 2:you did take that step and make it Facebook official. What were the responses to that?
Speaker 1:It was positive actually. Yeah, there were a couple people who were confused. They were like wait what? And then you had to explain it and then they still were like wait what? It was mostly people that were either pining after Chelsea or pining after me, but I think I even referred to her sometimes as my boyfriend when I was talking to people. I'd be like, oh yeah, my boyfriend back home, blah, blah, blah, because I was just like I just don't want to deal with this right now, and so what was your question?
Speaker 2:Oh, just how were the responses from friends, family when you did come out and say hey, this is Chelsea, she is my boyfriend. I've been telling you about.
Speaker 1:Yeah, people were pretty positive and supportive. And the people who would? Because I had introduced Chelsea as my roommate many, many, many, many times to my family and so they were like, yay, we love Chelsea.
Speaker 2:And they were roommates.
Speaker 1:I know, yeah, and it was. We were very happily roommate for many moons. I can't believe we got away with it for two years.
Speaker 2:That's like that is really impressive.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I don't know I don't want the kids these days how long they're keeping it under, or even if they are keeping it under apps. Hopefully they're not, yeah.
Speaker 2:Hopefully, and I also just feel like today with granted yeah, facebook was a thing. Back then we were on social media, but I feel like today it would be so much harder to hide something like that, with everything being on the internet. So what does life look like now? What have you gained in the years since?
Speaker 1:Oh wonderful, we have a house and we have two dogs and a cat. We have many friends, lots of family, lots of like wonderful people. I have a community in Minnesota as well, because I got my MBA there, and so we've got friends. We've got friends near and far, I don't know. Things are good.
Speaker 2:Good Talk to me more about realizing that you felt at home in the day pronoun and especially coming up in the environment that you did.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I don't know exactly when it it was within this past year that I decided I wanted to have she they pronouns, and I can't tell you exactly. I just kind of realized I was non binary and I think it was just conversations that having. Oh, there were so many conversations around gender and I was just like I don't really feel at home in one gender or another, like I feel comfortable I'm a feminine. I don't know.
Speaker 2:I'm still kind of grappling with it a little bit where it's like well, and I think we have kind of this idea as a society that non binary like looks one way, that it is like super androgynous. I know you just said that you're still grappling with it, but now where you're at, like, what does being non binary mean for you?
Speaker 1:Well, for me it means freedom. It's like I get to dress how I want, I get to feel how I want, I get to talk and interact. However, I feel you know there's so many weird gendered things that are like unnecessarily so. Like when you register for a conference, for example, why do you have to register as like male or female, it doesn't?
Speaker 2:make sense. Why do you need this information? What are you?
Speaker 1:doing.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:For me it's like peace that's so powerful.
Speaker 2:You had mentioned briefly that you think like growing up in the construction business may have kind of influenced your gender expression as well. Can you talk about that?
Speaker 1:Yeah, well, because I was always working around people and crews and stuff that I mean they were addressed to perform work and it was pretty, you know, a pretty set uniform, not a uniform, so to speak, but you know you had your jeans and your high vis top and your something to hold your drill and that kind of stuff, and so I think that is I mean, I have a wild thing romper. That is like my favorite outfit just because it makes me feel just like at home on a job site. Almost Not really, but you know, yeah, Absolutely so.
Speaker 2:tell me about business lesbian.
Speaker 1:Yeah, my podcast that is again kind of a riff on. So the University of Minnesota's slogan is business as a force for good, and so that really inspired me a lot throughout. I've dropped it a couple of times, even on this episode. But business lesbian is again a podcast where I interview people who are using business as a force for good, and the first season that's out right now was mostly me interviewing my friends and colleagues from my career at industrial builders and talking about those when I was transitioning out of industrial builders. So I was talking about that career and what it means to build a business what it means to build a successful business where you treat people well.
Speaker 2:So why, when you decided to launch this podcast, was it important for you to have, like, your sexuality tied into it at all?
Speaker 1:I think part of it was like I'm a business lesbian, that's who I am, and so I'm like there is no question about it. I don't want you to like start the podcast and then be like, why is this girl talking about her sexuality so much about her queerness or whatever, like I want it just to be pretty clear, cut from the beginning that you know what you're getting into.
Speaker 2:How have you gotten to this place where because it's so cool to see that you went from you know as a teenager convinced that you were straight like not really any idea that you were going to figure out that your sexuality was anything different, to today where you are Very outspoken and like super involved in this community? How has that growth happened? I guess?
Speaker 1:I think it's just in the past decade or so there has been so many positive but so many negative things that have happened societally and I think that I Just became more resilient where I was like I know that I can't make myself smaller, I'm not going to be able to get that space back, and so I mean the past year Legislatively has been really challenging, especially in North Dakota. I know you said that you moved out of North Dakota, but out of necessity, and then out of when I was at the family business I knew I would not be fired for being outspoken about who I was, because my dad was the president of the company. So I was like I know no one's gonna let me go, I know no one's, like people might talk shit but like then what you know, and so I think I kind of had a little audacity from that and then just frustration and being like I just need to Be myself. I can't not be myself if I have this much privilege to waste. It would be a waste.
Speaker 2:That's such a unique example of like using your privilege for good, because, how I hear it, I wouldn't even you say privilege, I just hear like the courage in being that Outspoken and like upfront with who you are.
Speaker 1:So it's just really nice to hear.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, it's nice to hear it.
Speaker 1:Poised that way.
Speaker 2:Good. How else are you and your wife involved in the local LGBTQ plus community?
Speaker 1:Well, my wife is the chair of FM Pride, and so pride it is coming up like in seven days.
Speaker 2:Really.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's next weekend. Yeah, six days, six days, no five days. Next Wednesday, the 10th, it starts on the soon. Yeah, it starts very soon yeah, and my wife is the chair of the FM Pride committee, so very involved in that. I'm a pride wife, which means I do whatever she needs me to to support that. So I'm not officially involved in any of the committees or planning or anything, but I'm just there In any way that you need to. So sometimes that's bringing water to all of the volunteers, sometimes that's picking up trash after pride in the park and that kind of stuff.
Speaker 2:It sounds like at least everything that you've shared so far. It sounds like for you, coming out, coming into yourself, has been a very smooth experience. Have you experienced any like Roadblocks along the way or like times where you've struggled with this a little bit more?
Speaker 1:not really. I've had a pretty lucky go of it. I've had a lot of internalized homophobia, I think, just from being raised in a family that was kind of religious and we talked a little bit about how being With someone of the same sex is wrong. My family's kind of since come around because they like Chelsea and they like having me around. They kind of know it's a non-negotiable arrangement. But no, I've had a pretty smooth time. I think the toughest person for most of it has been me and myself.
Speaker 1:Can you say more about that and like what that has looked like for you and like what those Thoughts have been yeah, I think and I mean not to say that I was like totally beating myself up or anything like that, I'm just I'm in a lot of therapy right now, and so that's one of the things that we've been talking about and root cause of a lot of. I think it's part of the reason that I'm so vocal About being out, because it's almost like a Jekyll and Hyde or it's like I'm gonna be the business lesbian and then other times I'm like you should not be taking up this space. You shouldn't be talking about being gay. Yeah, so there's still.
Speaker 2:I think I've gotten through most of it In those times when you are struggling with that internalized homophobia, how do you care for yourself through that?
Speaker 1:I look a lot at my queer community and find inspiration from them, from those who are living their lives so happily and as themselves. I look to my wife and remember how lucky I am to be married to such a wonderful human. It's weird, it comes up at the weirdest times, but when you're raised in a way that you never know, when it's almost like okay, I'm going to reach for her hand and then it's like, oh, maybe not right now, I don't know.
Speaker 2:You mentioned therapy and we're big fans of therapy on this podcast.
Speaker 1:We love therapy, yes.
Speaker 2:Yay, therapists. Are there other organizations or resources or support systems that have been helpful throughout your pride story?
Speaker 1:In my pride story it's been my friend groups. They're unofficial organizations, my queer friends. It took a long time in the Fargo-Moorhead area to get a group of friends that were queer but now I'm on a Stonewall Sports Kickball League. That is really a joy and so a wonderful source of queer community and just like queer joy in general.
Speaker 2:You mentioned that it took a long time to form a queer community here in Fargo-Moorhead. Can you talk more about that and maybe how that's evolved over the years?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think that was mostly probably on me for being kind of a when I was in school. I was pretty studious, so I just kind of stuck to class and I was in the construction management program at NDSU. So I was the only girl, so there were no other queer women because there were no other women at the time. Actually, by the time I was a senior, I think there was one more. Anyway, not a lot of diversity in that program or gender diversity Very little Anyway. So in my school program I didn't find any queer community. I went to the College of Business as well and I got a business administration major. No one was out there that I knew of, so in school I didn't meet anyone. That was really, and this was. I graduated in 2015, so somewhere around there. So people weren't as out as they are now, which was kind of crazy to think about.
Speaker 2:How have you seen that change? In the last, everyone is gay. Now. It's amazing. Everything I love it.
Speaker 1:I love it so much, yeah, because I have some friends who are educators of K-12 and they're like the comfort that people feel in their identities is just really inspiring. Hearing them talk about it is really inspiring, for sure.
Speaker 2:So we've kind of talked around this idea of pride this whole time and it's in the title of the podcast, pride Stories. But what does that word pride mean to you?
Speaker 1:Feeling assured in your safety and self. I think Say more about that, because it's one thing to just kind of know who you are, but it's another to feel comfortable expressing it and feel comfortable living it and feel comfortable finding a community that kind of echoes that for you. And so for me it's not just existing, it's existing proudly and proudly in pride. You can't define the word with the word.
Speaker 2:So, with that in mind, what are you proud of? I'm proud of my family.
Speaker 1:I'm proud of the community that we have in Fargo, the queer community. We're tough Having been involved with and I never really finished that queer the story about how I built a queer community after NDSU. But working with when Chelsea became involved with the FM Pride Coalition, meeting the people who volunteered their time and effort to create this pride week and winter pride. Really it is inspiring to meet people who are just doing things from the kindness of like they're doing it because they want other people to have a positive experience.
Speaker 2:It's really interesting, and I don't know if it's just like Midwest humility, but you immediately went to other people and other things that you're proud of. What?
Speaker 1:about therapy. Yeah, that's the thing I'm working on.
Speaker 2:So now we can do podcasting, which is basically just like fake therapy. What are you proud of when it comes to yourself?
Speaker 1:I'm proud to. I've had some health issues lately, so to be honest, I'm just proud to be alive and to feel a little bit like myself again. Things can knock you down and it's important to try to figure out a way to get back up. I'm proud of my brain, so my brain is probably my trickiest asset, but it is for sure the thing that gets me will get me the furthest I think anywhere in my life.
Speaker 2:What do you mean? Not the trickiest?
Speaker 1:asset. So I was recently diagnosed with bipolar disorder, and so the highs and lows that I used to ride are now making more sense of how they came to be. But so now that I have discovered that and I'm medicated, I'm just level, which is nice, but I'm much lower. People are used to accustomed to me on my highs, and so, as far as tricky assets go, my energy level, my thoughts, my thoughts to myself they can be a little nefarious sometimes, but I can also be incredibly creative and incredibly kind. I can be very compassionate to other people, and so there are things that my brain does that, even when I'm not in a great space, that it kind of makes me proud to be myself.
Speaker 2:I love that perspective because when you are living with a mental illness, it is so easy to just be like why is my brain trying to kill me from the inside? And like, not think about all of the beautiful things that it does for you on a daily basis? So that's really cool. Is there a message or a piece of advice or just anything you could share with our listeners, especially those who might be struggling to find their pride?
Speaker 1:Look at the thing that you did today. Give yourself a pat on the back for the thing that you did today that you didn't think you'd do, and go find your people, I think with pride. For me, it's all about community. It's all about the people that you can surround yourself with and the people that life is a long journey and there's going to be times where you feel on top of the world and there's going to be times where you need someone else to support you and to have a strong community makes such a big difference.
Speaker 2:Absolutely Well, we did make it past the 30 minute mark, so go us. And what else do you want to share? What else do you have to say or ask that?
Speaker 1:I haven't given you an opportunity to yet. Nothing. I mean season two of Business Lesbian will be coming sometime soon. I have one episode in the can. I need to record some more, but again I've been dealing with some personal issues and trying to get the show to the quality level that I wanted to be at.
Speaker 2:Where can listeners find you and Business Lesbian.
Speaker 1:Business. Lesbian can be found anywhere. You listen to podcasts Spotify, apple Podcasts, google Podcasts, all of them and then I can be found. Well, physically, I'm like I can be found around Fargo.
Speaker 2:Please do not come find me. That's really creepy.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and you can find me on LinkedIn or Instagram. Cool, those are my designated ones. I'm going to choose.
Speaker 2:Awesome. Like don't come for me, on like TikTok.
Speaker 1:TikTok. You can find me on TikTok, but it's going to be chaos.
Speaker 2:So, as it should be, yeah, awesome, well, thank you so much, brittany. This has been so much fun and this has been Pride Stories, the podcast.
Speaker 1:Woo, good job, you're a great host.
Speaker 2:Thank you. Thank you for listening to Pride Stories, the podcast. I'm your host, katie Beatty, and it's been an honor to bring this story to your ears. Pride Stories is proudly presented by Tell Well Story Co and Studio. We have an incredible team that makes this podcast possible, including executive producer Max Kringen, contributing producers Andrew Parsons, duncan Williamson and Annie Wood, with additional support by Emma Maddock, matt Priggy, rosie Mortensen and the entire team at Tell Well. If you've been inspired, moved or entertained by anything you've heard in this episode, please consider supporting our mission, subscribe to the podcast, leave a five-star review or simply share it with a friend or family member. Your support keeps the stories alive and resonating, and if you feel compelled to share your own Pride Story, we'd be honored to listen. Please visit the link in the description of this episode to get in touch. No matter where you are in your journey, whether you're out and proud or just finding your voice, remember you have a story to tell and it deserves to be heard.