LOVE SONGS #2: THE ATTRACTION OF REAL LOVE with Rabbi Brian Bileci 2-9-25

“O my love, you are altogether BEAUTIFUL and fair. There is NO FLAW nor BLEMISH in you!” - Song of Songs 4:‭7‬ ‭(AMP)‬‬

HOW TO DISCOVER AND BE ATTRACTED TO REAL LOVE OVER SUPERFICIAL LOVE :

1. THE ATTRACTION TO REAL LOVE IS BASED ON REAL VALUES

The Young Women of Jerusalem: 9 “O woman of RARE BEAUTY, what is it about your LOVED ONE that is better than any other, that you command us this?” The Girl: 10 “My BELOVED one is TANNED and HANDSOME, better than ten thousand others! 11 His head is purest gold, and he has wavy, raven hair. 12 His eyes are like doves beside the water brooks, deep and quiet. 13 His cheeks are like sweetly scented beds of spices. His lips are perfumed lilies, his breath like myrrh. 14 His arms are round bars of gold set with topaz; his body is bright ivory encrusted with jewels. 15 His legs are as pillars of marble set in sockets of finest gold, like cedars of Lebanon; none can rival him. 16 His mouth is altogether sweet, lovable in every way. Such, O women of Jerusalem, is my BELOVED, my friend.” - Song of Songs 5:9-16 (TLB)

•  Be drawn to who a person is internally and not only what they look like externally

•  Don’t be fooled by someone’s charm or charisma when they are lacking in character

•  Don’t let temporary emotions rob you of the long-lasting commitment of real love and a covenant bond

•  Love from the heart and avoid lusting with the eyes so that you are attracted to real love over illusion

•  Let God’s source of real love dictate who you love as you discern who they are

•  Make sure you value: Mutual Respect & Admiration, Commitment & Exclusivity, Emotional & Spiritual Intimacy, Patience & Timing, Security & Trust, and the Power of Real Lasting Love

2. BE SECURE IN WHO YOU ARE BEFORE YOU SEEK LOVE

I am my BELOVED’S and my BELOVED is MINE; he browses among the lilies.” - Song of Songs 6:3 (NIV)

6 Hold me close to your heart where your royal seal is worn. Keep me as close to yourself as the bracelet on your arm. My love for you is so strong it won’t let you go. Love is as powerful as death. Love’s jealousy is as strong as the grave. Love is like a blazing fire. Love burns like a mighty flame. 7 No amount of water can put it out.  Rivers can’t sweep it away [NKJV: “Many waters cannot quench love”] . Suppose someone offers all their wealth to buy love. That won’t even come close to being enough.” - Song of Songs 8:6-7 (NIRV)

“REAL LOVE is not based on ROMANCE, candlelight dinners, and walks along the beach. It is based on respect, compromise, care, and trust.” ~ Unknown 

Is your relationship secure? Here are some questions to ask yourself to test the status of your relationship:

1. Does this relationship encourage me to be secure in who I am or ask me to be someone else? 

2. Does this relationship push me to do things that I desire to accomplish, to fulfill my goals? 

3. Does this person consider what is in my best interest or do they try to manipulate me to do what they want? 

4. Do you trust the other person when you’re not together or do you become anxious if you can’t control the narrative or their behavior?

“The BEST LOVE is the one that makes you a BETTER PERSON, without changing you into someone other than yourself.” ~ Unknown

3. NEVER LET ATTRACTION DE-VALUE YOUR DEVOTION TO GOD

“Young women of Jerusalem, I charge you by the gazelles and the wild does of the field, do not stir up or AWAKEN LOVE until the APPROPRIATE TIME.” -