Obstacles to Opportunities
When faced with life's obstacles, let's channel that negative energy into positivity and forge opportunities. Throughout the nation, business owners will share their experiences of triumphing over daunting challenges in their careers and lives, illustrating how they've harnessed these experiences for growth opportunities.
Obstacles to Opportunities
Jess & Heather Talk Forgiveness & The Power of Letting Go
Welcome to Episode 9 of our podcast, where hosts Jess and Heather delve into the profound and transformative theme of forgiveness. Join us as Heather shares her personal journey of letting go, unveiling the burning desire she holds this year to release anger and embrace the liberating power of forgiveness.
In this heartfelt conversation, Jess and Heather open up about their own challenges with forgiveness, exploring the intricacies of moving from a place of victimhood to one of freedom and positivity. Heather takes us through the steps of her forgiveness process, providing valuable insights and lessons learned along the way.
Discover the cathartic power of forgiveness as Jess and Heather navigate through the complexities of releasing negativity and embracing a life unburdened by unforgiveness. Tune in for an episode filled with authenticity, vulnerability, and the empowering message that forgiveness has the potential to heal and transform. Join us on this emotional and enlightening journey as we explore the path to forgiveness on Episode 9.
Welcome to the obstacles to opportunities podcast.
Speaker 2:I'm Jess Powell, your host, and I'm Heather Kane, your co-host, and we are. It's just us. It is. But this is my favorite because I have like a burning topic that I just feel like the world needs to hear.
Speaker 1:I can't wait, let's go, let's go. And you told me this Um, my mind's been kind of spinning on it, yeah, and I, you, you had given me a little background, and so so now I want you to bring everyone up to speed on, like, why this has been on your heart, yeah, and well, I feel, yeah, so I feel like going into this next year.
Speaker 2:I I just had so much that I wanted just to release, because I I kind of have realized as I've gotten older that the more you hold on to things, it only hurts you, it hurts nobody else. And I was holding on to some things that I just felt like I needed to rerelease. And and the reason why is I actually this is I'm going to read this, okay, um, because this is something that really hit me hard and those of you that are listening that really want to become the full potential of yourselves and really cultivate the relationships that God put on this earth for you to create, I think you need to hear this. So it's the prayer of forgiveness. It says father, I know that I have anything in my heart against anyone.
Speaker 2:It blocks my ability to receive from you. I know you want me to forgive the way I want to be forgiven, so I thank you for showing me anything that may have crept into my heart so that I can forgive and get past it. You work miracles through a clean heart, so I keep an open heart to you. I forgive anyone that may have trespassed against me and I ask that you show me anyone that has something against me today so that I can clear it up. I thank you for your forgiveness and everything. I recognize that I am human and you are always in a place of forgiveness towards me, no matter how difficult the situation is.
Speaker 1:It's powerful.
Speaker 2:It's so powerful and I so. I literally had time in my morning devotion time and I just literally wrote a list of every single person that when I thought that I had any type of negative energy. You know that when you think of that person's name and you have a feeling in your heart of like oh, there's maybe some enclosed business, I decided that I was going to reach out to every single one of them and reach out and ask for forgiveness. You know and it was interesting, when I was praying about it and doing it the voice that I kept getting in my head is well, they don't deserve your forgiveness. Why would you forgive them? Look at what they did to you.
Speaker 1:And then I thought to myself like that's that is the devil, it's the human, like sin side of us it is, it's the human condition. It is like we want to be right, yeah, and there's a justice in being the victim.
Speaker 2:Yeah, right, like, there's like a but they did it, but the thing is that only hurts us Exactly. And then I thought to myself, like, oh my gosh, like everybody deserves forgiveness. Right, jesus died on the cross for us, for for us to be forgiven of all of our sins. Like who am I to hold a grudge and feel like that towards someone? Because all that's doing is closing my heart and not allowing me to open my heart and receive. And I will tell you, I sent a ton of messages out to people and what I received back, literally, was days of tears of people just thanking me. Right, and I realized like everybody wants the feeling of forgiveness.
Speaker 1:Right, yeah, and that's. It's throughout the Bible, right. Like the forgiveness thread and our sinful human condition is, like you know the devil, like you you deserve, you deserve this anger, or like you deserve it because you were wronged, but then, but then God knows how we're made, yeah, and he knows that we need to let it go because it's poison. We're walking with poison.
Speaker 2:Well, and then what I realized. So after I did that, I realized, looking back at this last year, so many of my actions were out of anger and I thought to myself, oh my gosh, like in the moment I'm thinking, you know I'm the victim, right, but when I look back and reflect, I realize that things that I did or have said were out of anger and nothing good comes from anger. And so I just had this moment of just now, like I literally feel like light, as a feather, right. I feel like the weight and the heaviness has been completely removed off my heart because I have forgiven and let go of all of that negativity that I had brewing inside of me, which was not hurting them.
Speaker 1:No, yeah, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2:It was only hurting me. So I encourage all of you guys that are listening, like if there's something or someone or a situation or a group of people or whatever, like, open up and ask for forgiveness because at the end of the day, you will literally be able to become who you're meant to be, because you've opened your heart to other opportunities.
Speaker 1:I love it. I gotta ask a question, though.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:So someone may be listening. And to me there's kind of two types of forgiveness. There's the type where you both what you could say would be at fault, right.
Speaker 2:But you know, it got messy. Whatever happened, it got messy.
Speaker 1:And you could own something there. Then there's another type where you were just a victim. To me, those are two types of forgiveness ways to process right, yeah, so the one it sounds like that you did, it's kind of a mutual thing and maybe they released something too. With the one where, like, maybe someone was I mean I'll go down the road someone was raped, you had an alcoholic parent, you had someone wrong you and you were just a victim, that kind of forgiveness I've had to deal with it in my life and that to me, is like a very powerful thing that I've had to go through.
Speaker 1:And honestly, I remember a moment and I won't like go through who personally wronged me. But there was a moment where someone asked about the person and I remember just being extremely negative about what I said back about them To someone I actually didn't know that well and I left and I felt so heavy and just I thought I did not reflect Christ well in that situation and I have to let it go because I am not reflecting Christ in that situation and it was so heavy on me and I kinda like that week and that month I just really talked to God about it and I was like how do I release this? Like how, because it's so big.
Speaker 2:I know, and I think the only way you can do it is lean on his strengths and not yours, because we're not capable, because we are human, we're flesh right. Yeah, you know. It's interesting that you say that, because I was at a charity event and one of the people that I needed to forgive. I had never had this happen before and I'm curious if you've had this where I hadn't seen the person in a few years and that person walks in the room and, like I, immediately I felt sick, I started to sweat. I'm not much of an anxiety-driven person, but just being in the presence of that person I had this physical response.
Speaker 2:And then one of my friends went up to that person and started talking to them and I got angry at the person. Like how dare you speak to that person? Like where's your loyalty? And in that moment is when I realized I had massive issues. Like it wasn't on them, it was on me, like I had to move past. Have you ever had that feeling of being in?
Speaker 1:like it's that physical. Yeah, I mean definitely. I mean especially if you're kind of in the middle of it with someone or you know it's fresh or whatever.
Speaker 2:But but this wasn't even fresh. This was like years Really.
Speaker 1:Yeah, well, that I mean. I think that's fascinating because your body's telling you it's time to get rid of it.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Your body's literally like we don't like this. Yes, exactly, let's get over it, yeah. And then, like you said, you start to do things out of anger, like I was telling this guy out of anger certain things and he was an atheist. I knew he was an atheist and that was to me. I was like I am not representing Christ well in this.
Speaker 1:I mean, I wouldn't join up with this group or this deal, or you know, jesus, if this is how they're all acting, your quotes. And one thing God revealed to me in that season because it took a while for me to kind of get past and forgive was that the image of everyone is God's child. Mm-hmm Go. Everyone is human. Everyone makes mistakes.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Those things, and so for anyone who's dealing with like a very like personal, like deep thing that they're trying to get over, I had to write out their redeeming qualities, things that I knew God had planted in them, and I would pray over those things and I'd be like you know he is so good because you know you created him in this way, in this way, and I I tried to cultivate the best I could the way that God saw him, because, at the end of the day, God loves him.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I Really really worked on that, and what I can say and I have like told so many people this, it's like I'm not mad anymore. Yeah, the anger is gone, yeah, in our relationship. And I want to say this too is, when you forgive someone, that doesn't mean that like your relationships back to normal.
Speaker 2:I mean they have to be your friend.
Speaker 1:No, it doesn't mean that yeah and and with someone that maybe you're forgiving, that's close to you, that you still interact with it there. There can still be boundaries, right yeah? There's still, there could still be boundaries.
Speaker 2:There may be trust broken still, but time heals, time heals, but you have to let it go, yeah, in order to do that.
Speaker 2:So, let's, I'm gonna like circle back.
Speaker 2:So all of that happened, I would say, about two weeks ago, okay, two and a half weeks ago, where I just felt like I just had to let go, yeah, and I am so grateful, right, and in the last two weeks there has been an abundance of doors opening for me and I'm, like you know, you think to yourself, like are these doors opening because I surrendered and I Honestly feel in my heart like these are things that I've prayed about For for them to open, but the doors always seem to be closing on me, yeah, and now all of these doors are opening and I wonder, like you know, maybe I wasn't ready, because I had so much hurt and so much anger in my heart I wasn't able to, I wasn't ready, and so God was shutting those doors and now that I am at that point where I have forgiven and let go, he's opening all of these doors.
Speaker 2:So I think that for me, it's like, if you have that in you, like you have to let it go, yeah, because you don't know what you are holding yourself back from if you don't and you wonder how?
Speaker 1:how are you coming to the table every day differently? Yeah, you know what. How would that? How would you react to something now versus before? Because that that's kind of important to. Yeah, you know.
Speaker 2:I think for me you know I'm feisty, I mean I grew up military, I mean my dad, I mean you guys heard the episode before. I mean it was militant right growing up one, two, three sleep.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but I mean I, you know I am, I'm a very I'm an all in or all out kind of gal, right, and so I realize that I have to have balance in a relationship and I think I go all in on somebody and then the second they do something, I cut them at their knees. Where is not a good quality to have right? Because in the the crazy thing about that is I can. I can just cut them and move on like and I don't think of them again.
Speaker 1:But.
Speaker 2:But but that's not maybe, maybe not, though right Well well, clearly not, because I broke out in a hot sweat in the middle of a, but the way that you dealt with it.
Speaker 1:You thought emotionally you could do that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but clearly I can't.
Speaker 1:Clearly like suppressing a lot.
Speaker 2:I was. So now I just realized like I have to just reflect, like I can't just Cut someone at their knees. I have to just realize that like, listen, we all have, we all have problems, we are all flesh, we're all gonna make mistakes and I need to open my heart to more forgiveness and see other people's perspective on things. And it's been really like Fascinating. I Wouldn't say that I was good at forgiveness before and and the going into this next year like my word of the year, and then I believe my word of the year was intentional, I don't even remember, but now it's forgiveness, because that just keeps reiterating into my head. It's forgiveness, forgiveness, forgiveness.
Speaker 1:I love that. Yeah, I think that's so smart to do and I think everyone needs to kind of take time, reflect, just think through if you're having visceral moments of feeling like anger throughout the day to stop and be like why am I?
Speaker 1:What is this Like? Just like, feel it out, right. And you know what I say. When I was going to say something when you and now I'm going to come back to it you said I'm all in on people, which is such a good quality. But then you say if they wrong you, you're cutting them at your knees, right? And I always tell my good friends or people close to me. I say can we agree that we are going to think the best of each other? If I do something that you don't like, I want you to tell me, give me a chance to respond. And because I do feel like that sometimes, in anger, people can not think the best of you even in marriage right.
Speaker 1:I mean, I think about this with my husband that it's like do we always think the best of them in every situation? And it's so true. And I've had relationships like that where I want open communication because I know my heart and my intent with people it will always be pure. And so I'm like give me a shot, don't cut me at the knees.
Speaker 2:Give me a shot. I say that. But here's that. I think for me that the only thing that I don't just cut people at their knees, let's just say that. So I think any time that I feel like loyalty is in question or that there's a lie, OK, lying and loyalty are the two you're big, yeah, I think, because if you're lying about a situation or you're not loyal to me, I lose respect, right.
Speaker 2:So the second I lose respect. I'm done, and I don't know if that's just my dad instilled that from the time that we were so little. What am I mom? But I feel like those are two things. If you lie to me or you're not loyal and you do things behind my back and then try and lie about it, I like literally I don't know. I have this emotion in me where I'm like done.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:But I can't. It's a protection. Yeah, you're protecting yourself.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know, and it's very human to do that. People don't want to be lied to, people, don't you know?
Speaker 2:Yeah. So the obstacle is that feeling, but the opportunity is what are you holding yourself back from? Because you're not letting go of that? Yeah, and I think that's where, for me, I realized that the doors that are opening and the opportunities that are happening in our lives right now, I can't even wrap my head around the excitement I have around it. And I know it's because I wasn't ready and because I surrendered and I forgave, and I felt like and I know, jess, we didn't have a guest today and she's like, do you want to postpone? And I was like, no, because I have this burning desire in my heart to share with anyone that is listening. Like, take a moment, write your list of people, yeah, and pray about it. And if you hear that voice, well, they don't deserve it. They didn't do this, they didn't do this. Like that is not the voice to listen to.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, it's not. It's not. I love that. I think that's so powerful and I just wonder if more people did that, you know what this world would be like. You know? Oh, I could be so beautiful.
Speaker 2:I think so many people are walking around with anger.
Speaker 1:I mean, I think about that even at the grocery store, when someone cuts me off, I think in my mind, you know, I hurt people, hurt people, right yeah, and I think about that. I'm like, oh, that person must be like really having a bad day.
Speaker 2:I do that all the time, especially driving, like if someone like won't let me in on a lane or they give me a look and I'm like oh man, you need to be prayed over. Yeah, you're holding in some deep stuff right there, you need to like let that stuff go. I always tell my kids.
Speaker 1:I'm like it's not about you, it actually isn't Like sure they can. You know, anger is like, I think, what they say it's typically like. Is it a secondary emotion? There's something behind the anger right, oh, always and so when you're getting, you know, personally attacked, it's typically something else you know, yeah, but anyways, what would the world look like?
Speaker 2:Right, oh, it could be. It could be incredible. Yeah, Right, so we just this is, I know, a short episode today, but I wanted us just to talk about that. We have gotten some great traction on the podcast Amazing, so I would.
Speaker 1:Are people listening? Ever yes.
Speaker 2:I was like somewhere and someone like shared my story of me and Trader Joe's with like the baby crying and like me walking in a puddle of milk, and I was like dying laughing. I'm like, wow, people are actually listening, ok.
Speaker 2:This is cool I know it's amazing, so share, like we would encourage, like all of your listeners. Like, please share our podcast. You know this is this is meant to talk about how every obstacle in life can lead into a beautiful opportunity. But and we're loving interviewing entrepreneurs to share their story, because anyone that's had an obstacle in their life and they've created huge opportunity it's usually based off of the obstacles that got them to the bigger opportunity, right?
Speaker 1:Love it, yeah, and we have some amazing guests lined up. We do, I have been getting people primed and ready and people are asking us like, hey, can we be on your podcast? So you know, if you have a, if you have a desire and you know something that you want to share, you know, shoot us a note and we'd be happy to talk to you and get you slated in to you know, be on the show.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and you don't have to be local. We have figured out how to do it remote as well, so reach out to us. We would love to have you. Thanks, guys.
