Local Artist: Britt Cannino's Stagecraft Unleashed

Ever wondered how an actress could convincingly portray man's best friend on stage? In our latest episode, we're joined by the incredible Britt Cannino, who shares her journey into the heart of a beloved canine character in the play Sylvia.

Strap in for a whirlwind exploration of the acting world, where laughter mingles with profound insights. Britt opens up about the complexity of her performances, from the fast-paced world of improv to the rich tapestry of dramatic roles. Her stories reveal the craft behind the curtain - the rush of improvisation, the meticulous development of characters, and the way personal experiences can both challenge and deepen an actor's portrayal. Britt's revelations about the delicate balance between embracing a character and preserving one's self are as enlightening as they are heartfelt.

As we round off our conversation, the versatility of our talented guest truly shines through. We navigate an eclectic mix that spans from the nuances of food textures to the gravity of historical injustices, all while keeping our spirits lifted. 

Britt's aspirations, including her passion for teaching and her ventures into animation and digital effects, reflect a career fueled by dedication and a love for the arts. Join us for a session that promises to leave you both entertained and inspired, with a dash of whimsy and a whole lot of heart.

Transcript

David 0:01

I want you to remember, every time I have to start over, that Britt said it was fun. Yeah, I know, I know. Right, keep that smile on your face you ready, I'm ready, you ready, maybe here we go. I love you man. Oh yeah, hey everybody, it's March something. I don't even know what today's date is. It's the 25th, 26? Wait.

Britt 0:29

No, it's the 25th, it's the 25th no this comes out Tuesday.

David 0:34

Yeah, so when everybody listens, tomorrow, it will be the 26th.

Britt 0:39

Well, time is relative.

David 0:41

Time is relative. Oh, this is going to be a good show.

GC 0:43

Yeah, damn good show.

David 0:45

All right. Well, time is relative, time is relative. Oh, this is gonna be a good show, damn good show, all right. Well, hey everybody, how are you? What should I say? How are you doing? How'd you have you have a good weekend I did my man.

GC 0:51

How about you?

David 0:52

I had a great weekend I did you ready? Do you want to introduce our guest for this week?

GC 0:56

this I I have been waiting on this for the longest. One of the most talented Actresses. You see how I said that. I know, yeah, you did. Actor, amazing, indomitable.

David 1:10

Informidable.

GC 1:11

Informidable the powerful. You want to throw something in there before I say it.

Britt 1:19

It's a lot of superlatives, yeah.

GC 1:22

The amazing ladies and gentlemen.

David 1:25

Oh, you were saying something yeah, I'm gonna have to edit the shit out of that. We have on the show brit canino. Yeah, I got way too many buttons over here, man. Way too many buttons, all right I'm so excited. Make sure to push them that's a metaphor for something, so do you want to introduce so uh yeah, let's, let's talk.

GC 1:50

Let me tell you something. I'm gonna open this up. Yeah, I may embarrass her a little bit that's fine, she'll be okay. No, not really she's looking a little nervous I have parents.

David 1:59

Yeah, I know, yeah, yeah, I know, yeah.

GC 2:03

So I saw this young lady on stage one night at the Haynes Brand Theater. I can't remember what the show was, but Sarah and I went to the show and this young lady acting was so amazing amazing, she played a dog. Sylvia, sylvia. And she made you believe that she was a dog Dude.

David 2:32

See, now, that was a great way to open and introduce her.

GC 2:36

I'm just saying how many actors do you know? I know none. And I'm not saying she is a dog. I didn't say that she's gorgeous, but I didn't say that there are a lot of dogs that are gorgeous?

David 2:47

No, they're not they're not. I love a Boston Terrier.

GC 2:52

Oh you in love with a Boston Terrier? I mean right.

Britt 2:57

It's pronounced Baston, baston Terrier, baston Terrier.

GC 3:01

Oh yuck. I'm from New York, so I saw her do this show and I became a fan. I was already a fan anyway, but that just solidified my fandom and I knew when we started the podcast I had to have her on the show Because I wanted to know how do you prepare to be a damn dog? How do you do that?

David 3:25

But anyway, we'll get to that. Huh, hang out with a dog. Do you have a dog? You don't have a dog, do?

GC 3:31

you, I have plants.

David 3:31

Are you a cat man?

GC 3:33

I am not a cat man, he's a wow. No.

Britt 3:36

You're more into the photosynthesis? Yes, I am Kind of chlorophyll business.

GC 3:41

Chlorophyll, yes, all right you know when they die or fish. You know those who come from the sea shall return to the sea. Is it a? Chlorophyll filling yes, relationship it is you know they respond.

Britt 3:52

Do you know what that? Sorry that they were supposed to be a boo like sound cue or something.

David 3:56

Um, again I I don't know really what I'm doing and I don't have my glasses on, so at any time. I mean I could just hit something and it's like.

Britt 4:07

That would have been perfect. Why?

David 4:10

I just have sense memory. I think that's where it is, no, no.

GC 4:16

I love dogs, but I just had bad experiences With them dying.

Britt 4:22

And I just internalize it.

GC 4:24

But anyway, we'll get to that we will get.

Britt 4:27

It was a very like. Yes, it was a very memorable role, so I would love to talk about that.

GC 4:32

Yeah, it was very interesting, so but anyway, yeah, welcome to the show thank you welcome to this show.

David 4:38

If you want to pull the mic, just closer.

Britt 4:40

You got to kind of like Fluffy fluffy, almost like Graze graze it. Yeah, you kind of brush your face. I'm not, you don't have to touch it, I've been lonely for a while so I forgot.

David 4:53

You don't have to touch it, but it feels better if you touch.

GC 4:55

it Sounds better if you touch it.

David 5:05

So yeah, I've seen you around obviously.

GC 5:06

We have not worked together yet. We will one day.

David 5:07

Yes, but you've done a lot In town. You've done a lot of shows. Oh gosh, I saw you. What was my favorite?

Britt 5:15

Probably Marion was my favorite.

David 5:17

Yeah, that was so fun we almost worked together in Small Mouth Sounds, but yeah, I didn't get to do that one.

Britt 5:24

That one was very weird, but when did you so? You were here, you were born I was born in winston-salem in a hospital in a hospital I was in a hospital.

David 5:34

What I was we were very lucky.

Britt 5:36

I was born with young two other people, I'm a triplet, so what is this a true story?

David 5:43

yeah, it's true where are the other two?

Britt 5:46

well, uh, we got rid of them because they just weren't good enough oh no, is this a sad story it was kind of like sparta, you know, all three of us were thrown into a pit and it was like just work it out. Yeah, and because we were a darwinist family you know what I'm gonna talk about it just seriously for a hot second. Yes, I am a triplet, are you really?

David 6:10

okay yeah, yes so I'm not gonna ask, no, I'm serious like I'm not

Britt 6:20

gonna ask the second question my, my sister sister's name is Morgan and my brother's name is Blake, and so we are all the same age.

David 6:27

Are they still alive?

Britt 6:28

They are.

David 6:29

Oh, thank God.

GC 6:31

I thought they died at birth. Why would you think they wouldn't be alive?

David 6:34

Because triplets die at birth.

Britt 6:36

Sometimes only one makes it my sister almost did, she did, she went the wrong way and I was like like dude come on man, you have me scared.

GC 6:43

Why are you? Going upwards now are they the?

David 6:45

oldest me by like seconds by about a minute.

Britt 6:49

It was the best minute of my life because you were by yourself.

David 6:53

Yeah, are they. Are they artists too? Are they both?

Britt 6:55

no, they're, they're both very like. Yeah, they're both, they're very different yeah, or maybe I don don't know, maybe it's more like I'm very different. Who knows?

GC 7:08

But you're the oldest.

Britt 7:09

I am the oldest, so you set the tone for the rest of us.

GC 7:12

I always like the age dynamic. It's like one You're like in twins. Yeah, you know who got kicked out first, who got pushed out first.

Britt 7:21

You know that's awesome. Who got pushed out first? You know that's awesome. It was a very interesting way to grow up, because my parents, especially on our birthdays, tried to make it as individual as possible. We would usually have our own little cake. So I'd have my own cake decorated for me and my sister would have her own little cake decorated for her, same for my brother. And yeah, it was very.

David 7:46

Should you guys get along, or are you fighting?

Britt 7:51

Well, like most Southern families, we are benevolently estranged.

David 7:55

Very cool, really Very cool.

Britt 7:56

No, we're not. Oh, I got it, you know what she decided.

Britt 8:00

She said I'm going to lie my way through this, you know it's weird, families come back together and kind of we're in this like year of my. Both my siblings have kids and I think that there was there was this interesting transition with them building. I don't have any kids but whatever, I am kind of my own child, so it's fine, I'm a lot to manage, so I'm good. But yes, that I think that, yeah, family came kind of back together to be all sentimental.

Britt 8:35

But, yeah because, of children. They link. People want their, they want their children to get to know each other as cousins and then, through that, whatever the heck that I've never been a part of, yeah, well why me yeah? Kids. They're gonna end up being taller than me by the time they're 13 and it's just awkward. It's like fuck that kid. Yeah, fuck that kid, not related to me like that.

David 9:05

Italians are short. Yeah, not my kid not my niece, not my nephew and yeah, what the fuck?

Britt 9:12

and it just, it just seems awfully painful, ladies oh, it is, the pound went out I mean that's.

David 9:26

That is exactly how my mom described it.

Britt 9:28

I don't know how the this sentimental moment about family came into just I was just, you know, I don't.

David 9:34

I don't think I asked, I think it was because I thought your, your siblings, were dead, and that's how it kept going, it's fine yeah because she said they're gone she said that's why that's where you're going.

David 9:48

I have a tendency to take things that people say the dark place or or I just I I was active listening and something seemed to miss, so anyway so it's good that you're a team you went to oh god, are we? Is this actually a team? I don't think this is this. This, this is a special team and I'm not meaning that in a in a, I just mean we're. We're very unique, we're very unique team.

Britt 10:15

I'm gonna have to edit this shit out of this okay, so let me ask you a different question.

David 10:23

We'll go down a totally different role. So why acting? Why comedy?

Britt 10:30

um well, I hmm, they're kind of two separate answers. Can I answer them separately and and not in a ridiculously lengthy way?

Britt 10:41

absolutely okay cool, because they definitely converge. It's like a venn diagram, for sure, because they're both performance. But I I went to school for theater and theater wasn't super kind to me at that time. I had just come out of kind of a a dark moment and I was 19 and I went to uncg and the theater department was was just, it was very different back then. It was relatively small and very, um, kind of like a conservatory, but in a in a strange way.

David 11:19

No, I was not BFA.

Britt 11:21

I actually and I, I loved UNCG. I really did Like I learned a lot.

GC 11:26

It's a lot of pride.

Journey Through Theater and Improv

Britt 11:27

I loved UNCG. I learned a lot of things in an academic way, but I also learned a lot about, like, how to kind of just grit your teeth and be like, okay, well, if you're not going to, let me do something that I'm really passionate about doing, then I will figure out a way to do that myself. So I remember asking you know, how do I audition for a BFA? And I was this like 19 year old, like really like gung ho, motivated, uh, young woman with a pixie cut and a like just like I was, yeah, like a black, like dark brown, mohawked little pixie cut, and I was like, how do I do this thing? Because I really want to do this thing, yeah, um, and unfortunately the professor kind of looked at me and was like, I don't know, I wouldn't, you know, I wouldn't really waste your time. You don't really seem like you would be fit for it, what? And? And it was not like I'm not knocking anything, people say this kind of stuff but it was very interesting for me because I was like, hmm, I just started and I don't really know you, and okay, cool, uh, and so I didn't try and that that's fine. I am actually happy about that.

Britt 12:40

I went to the BA program, though, in theater and started trying to audition for things, but like couldn't get a role and it was just it felt impossible and I was watching so many of my friends that loved theater just as much as I did kind of drop out of the program because they got kind of hopeless and I started getting hopeless but I like really didn't want to stop doing it. There was just something about it that I was like I just really love this thing. And um, then our acting teachers were talking about improv. How important improv is for actors and musicians and dancers and anybody.

Britt 13:16

It's just a skill set that can extend way beyond, just like place. So, um, and I was like, oh well, we're, you know, we're not learning, we're not learning. I just thought this in my head and I was like, oh, this could be something that I could deviate away and like, maybe do on my own. And so I took some classes at the idiot box and then I was like this is really cool, and I feel I felt an adrenaline rush, like every time, like there was just something about it, about like having nothing and having to just like play this like sports game in your brain almost, and so it was a very invigorating thing, uh, that I didn't really need any class for, and I read a lot and I watched a lot of videos and I so I decided to start an improv troupe at UNCG the first improv troupe ever, and it was really awesome because I had all these people sign up.

Britt 14:15

And then by my senior year, I had like a troupe of like 15 people and we were performing all around like Greensboro and little coffee shops and not bars, because some were freshmen and they were underage and I wasn't going to do that and we were able to have the Upright Citizens Brigade come to our campus as a touring group. I got them to come and do their like long form improv show and we like opened for them. So what I can say about, yeah, like my experience with comedy was that it grounded me and made me have to figure things out on my own and it made me more confident to, after college, start to audition for like acting acting outside of comedy, outside of comedy.

Britt 15:02

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm of uh, outside of comedy outside so so comedy was like this weird, like I did not plan on any of that so which which do you prefer?

GC 15:14

I mean, when you, when you're auditioning and you know, maybe you could talk about the audition process, which you know, you two know is very grueling. So if you had your choice, which one? Would you actually go for a comedy drama, because, david, and I've seen you do it all, I know I think I have I don't know if I've seen you do drama.

David 15:39

Maybe small mouth sounds is considered kind of drama but it's got comedy in there, yeah.

Acting Methods and Character Development

Britt 15:45

Ironbound and then Educating Rita. Well, it was kind of a comedy, but it had intense moments.

GC 15:54

So do you normally lean into comedies rather than drama?

Britt 16:00

You prefer that. So drama, I kind of like all dramas, whereas I'm extremely, extremely particular with comedy. So I think I also think I go towards drama when it comes to play, because I do so much comedy outside of auditioning for plays in this city, so it's kind of like a little break for my comedy brain. So it's kind of like a little break for my comedy brain and I can get like really dive into what I learned and studied, like in acting classes. Like with backstory character, I will try as quickly as I can to be like okay, how can I make my body a little different so that I don't just look like Brit talking and stuff all the time? But with acting you have weeks to really delve into that and shape and mold the character. Yeah, and and um, usually comedies uh don't lend itself to a ton of backstory, unless it's a dramedy, would you agree?

GC 17:15

maybe because are you asking me?

Britt 17:17

it depends on the type of comedy. Right, like a farce, if you're going to be in a in a farce play, right you're, so much of the effort of that play is about the, the movement and the physical gags and the and the like the almost like Scooby Doo, like sequences where people are running in and out of the different rooms and oh my God, I just missed them. What? Yeah, so you can't put so much like you can't put all that like backstory acting effort into it, which is totally fine, but for me, like that's I don't, I'm not, I need, if I'm gonna be on stage in a play for like six weeks, I want to have, like, I want to have stuff to think about and work on between 8 am and 6 pm before before I get to rehearsal, before I do those door slams or the light cues or whatever.

GC 18:10

Well, for people who don't know, comedy is really hard it is very, very hard. Because I think, you know, I'm not a comedian, I'm just a dumbass. But that's what a comedian is. Yeah, and a lot of times you know two things is is timing and uh and and talent right, am I wrong? I mean david, I don't know.

David 18:35

I've seen a lot of talentless actors yes, I'm just saying honesty is what this is about.

GC 18:41

No, yeah yeah, and so, and a lot of times and a of times, if you think about it, a lot of comedians have a lot of tragedy in their background which shapes their comedy makes them funny.

Britt 18:56

I know that I make jokes, I'm I make. I make fun of some of the darkest moments in my life, like all the time to myself or whatever like right.

GC 19:08

So I just always I don't know why so someone who's listening, they're like well, I want to be a, a comedic actor. Um, what advice would you give them if they're? They're, you know, trying to break into the theater business here? You know, because most actors don't. They start locally and then, before they jettison up to the red carpet, I don't know.

David 19:33

Some people get famous by the time they're in, like you know, middle school. So I don't, I don't't really. I'm in a basement right now. What advice am I going to give you?

Britt 19:42

know what you guys have been doing. Yeah, you can tell people how to get out of the basement. I can tell people how to get in the basement. Very good, very easy Give up on your dreams Work a hard blue collar job, you'll end up in a basement.

David 19:58

love it um, yeah, so I don't, I don't, I have no advice. What advice do you have to give good talk?

Britt 20:05

local for uh com like for comedy or just in in general well, you could do both.

GC 20:12

You know we, we know you for your comedic chops.

David 20:16

You know, you know your improv I mean, do you want her to give you like advice how to get into comedy, like make comedy better, how to make it big or break in the scene?

Britt 20:25

I can tell you things, certain things that have worked for me over the years which are very which seems very, very simple, yet very, it takes a lot of effort. Uh, is you, when you watch a comedy or a drama or anything, whenever you laugh or whenever you have any kind of emotional reaction, even if you feel like it might not be the correct emotional reaction, you ask yourself why did I just feel that way with this actor, with what they just said or what they just did? Um, and I know that that sound I I'm not. I mean that literally I and I do that in normal life.

Britt 21:04

This is not meant to sound creepy, but I really do, kind of I really pay attention to people and some of that is because I'm I'm fairly anxious. So, actually, like in normal life, some of some of weirdly, my anxiety and my need to kind of do this and just kind of like make sure I'm cool in the room and I'm good and stuff like that, has actually just made me pay attention to people and like constantly it's a gift and a curse, maybe not a gift, but like just kind of that thing where I'm like I'm not super comfortable all the time and I'm paying attention to everybody and everything around me, and I started to use that as a my life. Instead of thinking of myself as a as a freak, I started to think like okay, well, maybe you can just use it.

GC 22:04

Yeah, like use it.

Britt 22:05

You're, you are an actor and you love to do this backstory weird work and you and you teach acting. Maybe use this um weird quirk of yours.

GC 22:16

So you, so you're, are we going into, like the meisner, you know, is that what you're going with?

Britt 22:21

I, I don't. I mean, I appreciate every single acting method for what it is and I take bits and pieces of it, okay, but I really serious, I really seriously stand by the idea of we I think, especially with stage theater, we tend to elevate it to like acting. Is acting like bigger? Bigger than life? Yes, it has to be louder because you're on a stage and you're trying to go towards like 500 people or whatever, but it's not bigger, like it's normal life.

Britt 22:53

It's like what you just saw that old couple at the coffee shop doing, like having their 75th anniversary and like how they were holding hands and looking at each other. Or like these people over there that are having an argument, or this person in their car and how they're sitting. And that's what I mean by it's like kind of this weird version of a lot of effort. If you, if you use this, this this is literally my method I'm just constantly thinking and I'm constantly asking why, like, why, why did that, what? The other day I saw a trailer for the new movie the penguin or some something with with uh colin farrell and I'm I.

Britt 23:38

I just saw I saw a trailer for it and colin farrell is a very talented actor. Like he started a little bit, he started kind of coming up and elevating himself. I think you know he's not he's not my fate, I would not put him on the top 10 of my list, but I do think that he's gone beyond what he used to be or whatever. Oh sure, just the sexy Irishman or whatever you know I mean. And so now he's kind of doing the Christian Bale thing where he puts a fat suit on and pretends to be. You know, I'm not attractive, take me seriously.

David 24:12

But wouldn't Christian Bale actually get fat? I feel like Christian.

Britt 24:16

Bale would just get fat. Yeah, I think he did. He would Colin Far get fat, like I feel like christian bale would just get fat.

David 24:18

Yeah, I, I think he did. He would colin farrell, he'll put on the fat suit.

Britt 24:21

But yeah, but colin farrell did this thing in the trailer, where he entered through the doorway and instead of and he looked really menacing and like really like you know whatever uh, and he had his mouth like hanging open right like a little bit like just hanging like, like kind of like, and I didn't laugh at it, though, because it was creepy and weird and like.

GC 24:48

And that was the point, though Menacing Right.

Improvisation and Acting Anxiety

Britt 24:50

But I like this, just an example of like, when you have those weird moments as a viewer and you're like what? Like pause, you pause it or you just think about it for a second and be like what, why? Why did that do something to me? More to me, and so I? I was like that that his mouth hanging open, other than his mouth being closed, made him more like animalistic, right, it makes him more look like unhinged and insane, and that's the whole point, right, right. So that's, that's this ridiculously long answer to how you can think about acting no, I think it was pretty short as you can think.

Britt 25:35

Nah, you stupid blue eyes.

David 25:36

That ain't't go on. That didn't go on at all.

GC 25:41

Because I think you're right.

David 25:43

That's all, sorry, I'm not trying to make you feel self-conscious about that at all. No, I'm just saying you were very self-aware in that moment. So no, it wasn't that long. I'm just fighting the levels here, so just ignore me.

GC 25:55

Okay, and you know the thing, because you made me believe that you were a fucking dog.

David 26:00

so I mean because she watched a dog well, so what?

GC 26:05

I? I watched dogs. You know how they greet each other, so I mean I don't.

David 26:09

I don't know what that has to do. No, I'm saying she's believable because she said she observes that's. That's the point of an actor.

GC 26:15

And I was just concurring with her assessment that you know. That's how you came up with the dog thing.

David 26:23

Which dog did you observe to?

GC 26:25

play.

Britt 26:27

Well, we kind of chose this breed of like a Labradoodle, which is like I don't know, that's what they chose Because they're hyper, yeah, kind of just happy and like the shell of that character is is a dog very, oh, I'm happy.

Britt 26:43

No, no semblance of time. Like everything's great until everything's not, and then everything's great again within a second. Um, but no, I mean, I I kind of I separated the idea of when dogs, how dogs show emotion and emotion and how humans show emotion. And then when I went into the script and made my like beats and stuff as an actor and was like, ok, this is how I'm feeling in this moment, this is how my human body works, like literally physically, I am a biped, I am not, like I don't. So this is, you know, when I'm curious, I chose to like rise upright when I'm scared. Obviously I'm going to shrink back and everything like a person would, but I don't, I mean I didn't. I had a dog at that time, and so there were when I would dog David when, I when I would take um.

Britt 27:43

When I would take him on a walk, like anytime he showed any type of behavior that was not just like walking and smelling, I would try to be like, okay, what just made him act that way, and is that? Is that happening in the play at all time?

GC 27:58

at any time. Listen, listen like can I?

Britt 28:00

can I make that work?

GC 28:02

you know, I don't know I just thought you were amazing because when you went off the stage, the dog where's the dog? You know to bring. Bring the dog back, you know not saying that the other actors on the stage where they were very talented, oh yeah, uh, you know they're, you know, freakishly talented, but I just enjoyed it all. So, what I want to do now Is transition into the Improv. If I didn't take too, much time, david, I'm sorry.

David 28:32

You didn't take too much time. I was just making a joke and it came off bad Because I was concentrating on levels so hard. So, I mean, I literally am sitting here fighting. David sounds like a dick, but no, that's actually true. I do sound like a dick most of the time.

GC 28:48

I do, I know that I do. Especially when I'm concentrating. Yeah, I know.

David 28:56

You didn't take too much time at all. Ha ha, that wasn't a long answer. Ha ha ha. Why is that level wrong? I'm pulling down too much. Sorry, we're just bleeding a lot. Oh yeah, I mean bleeding sound bleeding, not blood.

Britt 29:13

That's all right For those who are listening. In the Middle Ages that was a common medical procedure.

GC 29:18

Do you know? That's how George Washington died.

David 29:20

Oh, my God.

GC 29:21

Not again.

David 29:21

Look, you know.

GC 29:23

No.

Britt 29:24

I want to know, I want to know.

GC 29:25

Do you want to know?

David 29:26

Quick fact Do not say the thing about the slave. It's true, it's not.

Britt 29:33

What is wrong with you?

GC 29:34

I'm sorry, no, it's true, you know he died headed to the slave quarters and he caught pneumonia. Yeah, headed down there because he was getting ready to you know. I literally spent like 30 minutes trying to find this and it's non-existent.

David 29:50

Who told you that Anyway, improv.

GC 29:55

It's very true, you need to look that up. And they bled him to death. Okay, they believed you know the leeches. That's what they used to do.

David 30:01

So when you're alone On the stage Doing improv, do you feel like You're bleeding to death, kind of yeah, it does right, yeah, yeah. So Well, I identified with you A little bit Because you were talking About anxiety, right, and like I had anxiety.

GC 30:14

Oh, I still do have anxiety.

David 30:16

I don't know if that hurts or helps. What do you feel like? Hurts, uh like like acting yeah I don't know if it helps, but it feels like we all have anxiety like the best I don't know the best actors, but a lot of actors are very insecure.

GC 30:33

We're very high anxiety, so you're talking about before you go on stage, dav, david, or what do you?

David 30:37

what do you, what do you say to that I'm talking about in life, all the time on stage, oh, okay.

GC 30:42

For the non-actors I.

Britt 30:46

I think it helps. It helps me more.

David 30:50

Okay.

Britt 30:50

I think because, well, I think because it has, it makes me, it just Because it makes me, I just pay attention to everyone. But, like you know, like, okay, what are you doing? What are you doing? What are you doing? Where are you about to walk? What are you? But?

David 31:04

then don't you feel like that's what people are doing to you? They're watching you. They're watching you. They're watching you. Yeah, judging you.

Britt 31:20

Judging you and so I'm always kind'm like I'm mostly an introvert but like a lot of times, yeah, in normal life I'm very I mean I and I mean I do customer service and I like teach, and so there is a level of I have to hold myself up, but a lot of the times I'm like like a little turtle so then, what?

David 31:33

so you started the improv. Was it just so you could be on stage? Like it was just like.

Britt 31:36

Hey, this is what I can do right now with my with my friends that yeah, because I really I just it was so simple for me. They they're kind of the ones that made it more complicated for me it was I just wasn't getting the opportunities that I wanted. It had nothing to do with what I felt I deserved you mean acting roles yeah, acting roles or anything.

Britt 32:00

I just wasn't getting the opportunity and I had heard a comment about how important it was and I was like, well, okay, this seems easy, I could get a couple friends together, I could do this, I don't need a set.

David 32:12

Whose line is it anyway? Sort of improv, or is it like hey, it was short form.

GC 32:17

Short form, yeah.

Britt 32:19

Short form. I mean it really just. It just taught me how to kind of ask for forgiveness instead of permission, which I don't always do in my life. But like it was a good experience of like you don't have to always wait, you can do it Very good for you. I wait on things.

GC 32:47

Certainly I get freaked out but like you don't always have to wait, you know and, and so now tell us where you're gonna go with the improv thing, because you know I'm scared of shit. You know everybody's funny or they think they're funny, until you know, and forgive me for using a sports analogy, but I have to do it because that's what I know, analogy with improv all the time. Oh, okay, so everybody can play ball until the lights come on and the scoreboard is turned on and the crowd is there.

Britt 33:16

They got somebody in their face.

GC 33:19

Yeah, so everybody think they're funny. You know everybody's like oh, you're so funny. Well, try doing it on stage. Within what a five-minute time segment or something like that. Be funny.

Britt 33:32

Yeah.

GC 33:32

So it's, you know, do it on command, Be funny on command like SNL.

David 33:38

You know those, those uh I think the misconception is, though, is that you can just be funny some people can't just thank you funny, like I guess robin williams or something, but even his is rehearsed like that's the thing you think it was, uh, maybe not robin williams all the time, but of course he rehearsed because he had like, if you watch show after show after show after show of his, he had his comedy down.

Britt 34:01

It was scripted he has like he would go off, he has like guiding points, basically yeah, so when you're he would just be like I have to get back to here and I have to tell this joke and, whether he deviated or not, he yeah. And so.

David 34:14

so with comedy, like your improv, you don't just set up a date and have all your buddies come to do improv. I'm sure that you train Like you guys get together and you work on it. You don't just all of a sudden be like, hey guys, let's just go and be funny for people.

Britt 34:30

Yeah, no, the most common question. People are like, how do you rehearse improv? And people are like, how do you rehearse improv? And I'm like, well, I am not being condescending when I go into semantics, but it's actually kind of important. Because we don't rehearse it, because there's nothing to rehearse. We practice. And sports analogy right, you cannot rehearse a soccer game, you cannot plan for, okay, the other team's midfielder is going to pass to the left at this moment, and then they're gonna and we're gonna do this. You have to practice the skill sets that allow you to just prepare for the freaking game. So you have to practice dribbling and you have to practice passing and you have to practice shooting.

David 35:18

Right, so you get ready for the scenario.

Britt 35:19

Exactly, and so in improv there are a lot of different skill sets and a lot of different things to practice. You practice the idea of physical movement and using the space, and so you have certain scene exercises or warmups or whatever that gets your body and your brain used to that idea, because a lot of times improvisers because the first priority and I validate this the first priority is to speak, and so you're using your brain. Mostly a lot of improvisers forget to move. So that's one thing they forget to move.

GC 36:02

But here's the thing.

Britt 36:03

So that's one thing, that it's like that's a skill set, that it's not like you're doing a bad job, but it can elevate your, your game right like you can. You can be a better improviser if you practice, get just getting comfortable with oh, you have an entire stage, you can talk and go to the right a little bit.

GC 36:22

It's weird. See, here's the thing. Stuff like that. I think and you guys can help me with this the number one thing you have to have, like we were talking sports, like in basketball, either you can ball or you can't, or you're a pretty good basketball player. Here's the thing I think you have to have with improv. You have to be quick-witted.

Britt 36:45

Yeah.

Exploring Improv and Repressed Humor

GC 36:46

And if you're not quick-witted, how can you do it? And I think that's something that you're born, david, very quick-witted. I am not yeah dry. No, I'm like you're dry as with it. I am not yeah dry. You're dry as hell I am.

David 37:03

I make people think I You're dry, very dry, because I'm so dry Because I'm messing with levels.

Britt 37:11

But I'm just saying I get what you're saying. Some people like the dry piece of chicken. Not many in my experience. No, not many. I like the dry piece of chicken. Not many, yeah, in my experience no not many.

GC 37:20

I always like the. I'm not. Yeah, I like the big piece of chicken.

David 37:24

Yeah, I'm not very juicy. I'm not very juicy.

GC 37:29

I'm not very wet.

David 37:30

You know people who say let's switch gears here for a second Can.

Britt 37:33

I please Can nobody. No one ever describe their chicken as wet.

David 37:38

Never, ever. That's what I was going to say. You know how people hate the word moist.

GC 37:44

Teachers hated that word. I heard that.

David 37:46

People are always like I hate the word moist, it's so gross. You want some wet cake. You want some dry cake. No, you want some fucking moist cake.

Britt 37:56

Could we say damp, damp, I would like my cake to be.

David 38:00

It's a fucking moist cake.

Britt 38:01

Could we say damp, damp, yeah I would like my cake to be oh, I would like my cake to be dewy like the morning grass.

David 38:07

Yeah, dewy, I want my cake, dewy.

Britt 38:09

I would like a dewy cake please.

David 38:10

I mean, you could say succulent.

Britt 38:13

I want it to feel like the first time that I grazed my hand over the backyard while I'm smoking my cigarette and escaping my husband.

David 38:23

See, do you get it? I mean, it's not like moist is a beautiful word.

Britt 38:25

It's a beautiful word. It's just been stigmatized. I have one.

David 38:28

I have one.

GC 38:29

What Humid.

Britt 38:31

Humid.

David 38:31

People don't like that word. He wants a piece of humid cake.

GC 38:35

Oh, you want a humid cake. Yes, a piece of humid cake.

Britt 38:37

Yeah.

GC 38:38

I'll take it.

Britt 38:38

I'll take anything but dry cake You're all sweaty.

David 38:43

I don't know. I wouldn't take wet or dry Sweaty cake. That means that cake is a little bit salty.

Britt 38:49

No, that sounds like a porn site.

David 38:51

Sweaty cake. What is? It you want some sweaty cake Go to sweatycakecom.

GC 38:57

What is sweaty? Sweaty is when your water is sweaty and it leaves a ring on your table, right, don't they call that sweaty?

David 39:04

When your glass is sweaty.

GC 39:05

It's sweating.

Britt 39:08

It's leaking on your table. See words mean.

David 39:11

I can't say your glass is leaking on my table Because that means it's got a hole, no.

GC 39:16

Or like my grandmother used to say uh, tables are for glasses, not asses, because we used to sit on the table. Yeah, you know, but I mean it's just yeah, the words, words.

David 39:26

I don't know why where did we go? We were going so well, yeah, we were talking about improv and whether you can train. I think you can. Here's the thing.

David 39:34

Like I don't know much we did say quick-witted, but I will make the slight argument that I think that you can train people to not suck at improv, because I mean, I don't, I haven't done a lot of improv, you have. So I'm going to come off a little ignorant because I only did a few classes, but I do remember it was all about saying yes and because I only did a few classes but I do remember it was all about saying yes and rather than negating because it's very easy to block someone from going.

Britt 40:06

When I teach it, I teach it very like, almost like scientifically. It's fun, Like I have tons of fun and everything. But like yes, you start with that. So there is literally an exercise called yes, and, and it is meant to beat the idea into your brain. You beat that formula into your brain and the exercise is literally Gary, and I could play it right now. I just say the phrase it's Tuesday and we are drinking wine. Gary's job is to say yes, we are drinking wine and something.

Britt 40:47

But you keep building rather than and you keep doing it and we're going to get high. And we do the formula over and over, and over again over and over and over again.

Britt 40:55

And you do that enough times. You don't do this for like weeks on end, but you just like feel that enough time and you keep it to like one sentence each. There's just it's improv is not what it seems, and that's why it's terrifying, but that's also why sometimes people think that they can just do it, and I I didn't. I didn't think that way, but I definitely knew. I was like there's something to this, though that's more because I watched some videos and I was like, oh my God, because it is acting. I tell my students I say omit the word comedy. It's called Improv 101. For a reason it's not called Improv Comedy 101. You will be funny, people will laugh.

David 41:39

There's something about improv that it ends up being funny somehow I think because it's unscripted, because it's unscripted, you start going down weird corners that aren't natural it will be funny and I'm like, I promise you so do not think about the word comedy, but I mean everybody knows I. I think I'm known for being like dark humor, like personality, wise, dark, dry. I'm like.

Britt 42:05

I'm like a fine wine, I'm dark and like a cave in the sahara desert, but I'm also a bit like my humor.

David 42:10

We talked about this before the show started. I mean, I never did improv because in classes mine, I think it was because I was repressed as a kid you know sexuality you couldn't talk about it.

GC 42:22

No, no, it's because you were catholic.

David 42:24

Well, yeah, that's repressed sexuality right there. Yeah, that's the word.

Britt 42:27

That's actually when you open the thesaurus and you look at the definition of repressed, it literally just says catholic catholic.

GC 42:36

That's not true, listen, do you think?

Britt 42:38

that's not true.

David 42:38

Let's talk about george washington yeah, I was just gonna say yeah, that's not true, but george washington died from humping a slave. You know what? Stop it already, because it's true this is very true well then you send me the link.

GC 42:54

Send me the link hey, do you know who else did that? You know, you know thomas jefferson used to stoop the uh slaves too, right?

David 43:01

yeah, I did know that okay, so why it's a great story for him and not uh.

Britt 43:06

So what?

David 43:07

I'm bc everyone the more you know I'm just yeah, serious, read about it, kids. Rainbow star across my forehead.

GC 43:17

This is not the PBS. This is the dungeon.

David 43:23

So what I was trying to say, just really fast is that I? Grew up repressed. So my improv when we would do it in class Somehow, I would always End up doing something Sexual to make people laugh and, like you know, it gets to be a tired horse after a while there's only so many things I can hump on stage, it gets boring.

David 43:45

So I'm scared. I'm scared of improv, because I know that I'm always geared toward one thing, like you. Give me a random story to act out. I'm gonna make it sexual, because that's where my brain goes, the repressed, the repressed part of my brain that wants to get out the catholic well whatever, just the little boy that wasn't allowed to talk about things.

David 44:08

All of a sudden he just starts like oh, oh, we got a story. I'm gonna make you blush, because you made me blush all those years. And I'm gonna make you blush back. And I don't know that that's the right way to approach improv. I don't know that I would teach the young eight-year-olds that are in class.

Britt 44:23

I think you're just describing that somebody's the blanket that kids hold at night when they want to fall asleep.

David 44:30

Yes, it is. Repressed sexuality is what I hold, that's my blanket, that's your blanket. Repressed sexuality, exactly it is. What are we talking about? I?

Britt 44:41

don't really know.

David 44:42

What do you mean I? Thought I was very clear I'm repressed sexually as a child as a child and that affects your improv. It actually does. Yeah, it actually does. Actually, it affects my relationships in in uh, everyday life. You know, because your humor, your dryness, you're all the things that I am, uh, and I think it comes from. I was, I don't want to get into my life, but I'm just, I feel like every actor I feel like every actor has shit, please.

David 45:15

So every actor has their thing and I'm just that was my thing and I think now I'm trying to. I mean, obviously I'm still going to joke, like backstage or you know, during rehearsals and things like that, I'm going to have an off color joke and some of my jokes are very racist. I'm still doing that thing. I mean they are. It's to show the absurdity of racism.

GC 45:39

Yes, you do. It's acerbic, it's very acerbic. You love it, though. That's why we're here.

David 45:46

Oh, is it? Yeah, he doesn't think that though I love words. I told him I needed to tone it down. He's like David, we don't tone anything down. That's why we're here, Don't?

GC 45:54

tone anything down. You know, I think it's funny and caustic and corrosive.

David 46:01

Corrosive is a very good word.

GC 46:03

Why would you change?

David 46:04

that. Well, what I was going to say is, yeah, the past shapes us, gets us to where we are, but now that I'm getting old, and you know, when I approach a role, I'm seeing it differently. I'm not always looking. I mean, that's not always true. I just did something the other day. That was just you know. Anyway, I made a bad choice on stage and I omitted it.

GC 46:28

Did the director tell you it was a bad choice?

David 46:32

Yeah, but I was just doing it to be funny anyway, and then I was rehearsing again. I did it again and I'm like why?

Britt 46:35

did. I do that again. It doesn't fit.

David 46:37

I meant to cut that out.

Britt 46:38

Anyway, it doesn't matter, I was using my.

David 46:40

I was making a humping motion while this woman is supposed to be cleaning out a bowl. It doesn't matter. The point is what the fuck are? I'm trying to tell a story. I'm just saying that Now that I'm older, I've changed the way I approach a role In many, many ways, because my body has changed, my voice has changed. Obviously, my point of view has changed. So how is that? Like you start one way at UNCG With the improv. You're with your friends, you're doing it for fun. Now, you've been doing it a long, friends, you're doing it for fun.

GC 47:13

Now, you've been doing it a long time now you're teaching it.

David 47:15

Has it changed for you Like, is your approach differently? Or you feel like, oh no, I'm just building on what I started a long time ago, or are you like a 180 different because you've learned.

Acting Careers and Future Plans

Britt 47:26

I don't. I know I'm different. I mean it's cliche to say I'm way more confident. I know I'm different. I mean it's cliche to say I'm way more confident, but it's not a, it's a confidence in that I don't. I don't feel like I need to really prove much anymore because I've I've seen how you can go a year or two without being in a show and people are still, you're still. You look, look them in the eyes and your eyes still light up and you're like, oh my gosh, I remember. I remember what you did, or you remember what I did, or whatever it is, and that that's a thing.

Britt 48:00

You know, the whole FOMO, um, that I really the show iron bound, uh, which was in 2018, I think, and it was this beautiful, beautiful show. It was very dramatic, like there was, there was no, it was not a comedy, not a shred of comedy, other than a couple of moments of levity. You know, um, and I got way too far into it and wasn't just like the accent, like I was a polish immigrant woman and it spanned 20 years of my life, so, and each scene I was a different. I never left the state it was. It was a lot.

Britt 48:44

It was beautiful, too beautiful story, but it was very sad and, um, I went way too deep into it and because I thought that that's what it meant to be a dramatic actor, you know, like you gotta live it and you gotta like really, really torture yourself. Not, I wasn't, no, I didn't like go so far, but it I went far enough to where I did kind of lose myself and it took me a very long time to like just get back to normal and I realized I was like I don't know if I have to do that to still be able to cry on stage and feel on stage. I can figure out a. So that was a very important moment to where I did kind of change as an actor, that I stopped taking like myself so seriously and like just my process and all this kind of stuff, and I just I still took the art form seriously but I just didn't do the whole like method Daniel Day Lewis type of where I felt like that is what acting was Like.

Britt 49:52

I was like, no, you're still a person and you still can give things to other people outside of theater, like it's not all about you know performing. And that was a really big wake-up call for me. And so now I feel like I've found a pretty good balance of submerging into a role but also leaving and being brit again, kind of well, that leads me to the question what's next for brit?

GC 50:21

ha ha um well, when are we gonna see brit again? And, by the way, I would love to work, work with Britt. We always say that yeah, but you know I worked with this guy, across the table from him before.

David 50:37

One time, no, one time. You didn't even like it. What was the other one? White Christmas, that was it.

GC 50:45

They had this brother behind his mic in.

Britt 50:46

White Christmas, the Jewish brother.

GC 50:47

Ain't that some shit? Mm-hmm, that's some shit. Right Behind his mic in white Christmas.

David 50:49

The Jewish brother. Ain't that some shit?

GC 50:52

That's that bullshit. I looked it up.

Britt 50:54

Today I was like what's the bullshit? Today they were like this Jewish brother Getting cast in white Christmas.

David 51:01

Yes, I mean, that is actually. There are a lot of people that accuse Some theaters of racism, but you got to be in White Christmas, so I don't see it. I don't see it.

GC 51:16

You were my captain.

David 51:18

You were my captain. I was not, yeah, you were. You were the guy. You were supposedly above me in rank in the military.

GC 51:25

I was. No, that wouldn't happen in real life.

David 51:27

No, not in World War II. That's actually true. See, I sound like I'm saying a dick thing, but it was actually. It wasn't me, it was the world.

Britt 51:36

Oh yeah, I didn't do it.

David 51:38

I I you know. I wish I could take credit for all the racism in the world listen, I was not, but I was a sergeant, you remember that? Yeah, but I was below you. No, you weren't. Yeah, you were, you were ordering us around. Remember the script?

Britt 51:49

anyway, I forgot my whistle.

David 51:51

What is next for you? What's next for me? What is next for you?

Britt 51:59

I just in general. I mean, I don't know about what's next, but I feel like I'm, I mean, I'm still, I'm teaching and I'm teaching a lot more for Little Theater. And so we're building the education program a lot and I am hoping to bring Bunker Dogs back. Whoop, whoop. Yeah, what's up?

GC 52:20

Bunker Dogs, Improv Yo have a brother on have a brother on what's up.

David 52:26

You got to learn how to say yes and yeah Fuck that, fuck that, yeah.

Britt 52:30

Fuck that, fuck that, yeah. That's not the golden rule of improv at all. Oh, is that? No, oh, yes.

David 52:37

That's just an exercise.

Britt 52:39

So that? And then I I mean I just graduated with a degree in animation and digital effects.

David 52:46

Whoa so I do.

Britt 52:47

I do hope to Whoa Continue. I'm building my portfolio and stuff for that.

David 52:53

That is amazing.

Britt 52:54

Yeah.

David 52:54

See, that's one of those things that is actually. This is what's next for you. Okay, so when you accomplish something, sorry.

Britt 53:03

I graduated with a degree in animation and digital effects last year, and so I've been building my portfolio with the specialties that I would like to go into, and I don't know if I ever will, because it's a ridiculously competitive industry, as is all the arts yeah, but you never know so I mean, yeah, that's amazing.

David 53:22

Well, whenever you're on stage next, uh, I would just encourage anybody who's listening, yes, that they should come to you.

GC 53:29

Aw, thank you Absolutely. Treat yourself, treat yourself, I'm serious.

Britt 53:34

Treat yourself. Treat yourself. Fine leather goods yes, treat yourself.

GC 53:40

Yes, all the time.

David 53:41

Yeah, and hopefully You're doing stuff with Cause you direct as well.

Britt 53:45

You direct, you act.

David 53:46

You know, do improv Bunker dogs. That would be great.

Britt 53:50

To come back, yep Starting to have some combos about that.

David 53:54

You can get that chucklehead. If you need somebody to do awkward sexuality On stage, I'm there for you.

Britt 54:02

I'll message you when I feel like being a part of the cancel culture.

David 54:07

I don't get canceled. I'm not doing anything like what do you think I'm doing? Oh, oh wait, I'm not doing anything. Like what do you think I'm doing?

Britt 54:12

Oh, oh wait, oh oh, I'm saying yes and.

David 54:15

I don't know. I'm just saying, I'm just saying you got to be careful. Why? Because, oh, because, okay, that's a whole other podcast.

Britt 54:25

Yeah, no glove, no love. Oh, I don't know where that came from, but I like it.

GC 54:36

Wear gloves kids Wear gloves All the time.

Britt 54:41

No glove, no love.

David 54:43

I think. I think that means what it Doesn't mean to you too. It means whatever.

Britt 54:49

It means whatever you want it to mean, you know what it means.

David 54:52

I know what it means. I'm not sure anymore.

Britt 54:56

That's why he's sexually repressed.

David 54:57

Yeah.

GC 54:59

Do you think it?

David 54:59

means what you think it means Winter accessories yes. It means if you don't wear your gloves, then Jesus doesn't love you at Christmas. That is what it means.

GC 55:13

Thank you, Jesus, for this warm pair of gloves.

Britt 55:16

Thank, you baby Jesus. Don't even talk about mittens. What are we doing?

David 55:22

Mittens Are those made out of lamb. What is that Mitten? That's a weird word.

GC 55:26

We just got canceled.

David 55:28

We got canceled by I'm not sure by who. Yeah. I know right, all right. Well, hey, thank you for coming here and surviving the dungeon Much love, much love. Definitely come back. We're going to pump this out. Tell all your friends.

GC 55:43

I will To like subscribe.

David 55:44

I can't even do that. See, I'm so old I can't do that whole. Like subscribe, share, join. Leave a five-star review, find us on all your favorite platforms. And if you don't find us on your platform, then dump the platform damn right and uh, yeah, I mean, what else do you say? Because ring my bell yeah, ring, ring my bell ding ding no that's how it went cut that's how it went, cut.

GC 56:10

That's how it went, cut. I was there, you weren't even born.

Britt 56:14

What are we talking about? Don't argue with me on the air. Oh shit, Sorry.

David 56:16

That's how it goes when you bring a brother on stage. All right, oh snap, I get to edit that out if I feel like it sounded too racist. World War II everybody In World War II. You would have been my.

Britt 56:31

Biscuit.

David 56:35

You would have been in a different company, that's all it would have been.

GC 56:38

You know what? Here's the thing.

David 56:40

Can I say this before we depart yeah, I mean, I love it when you talk.

GC 56:46

Well, and I'm going to do it even more now Do you know what my father, my grandfather, fought in world war ii? And when he was over there he fought. You know, he was in battle. Right serious, it's true story. And then and I'm this is sort of like a dave chappelle story but my grandfather went over there and, um, and they pleasured him for a crunch bar. The Germans did yes, for a crunch bar, and then he had to come back home. You know, he was getting pleasured for a crunch bar, a Hershey bar, and then he had to come home after all that battle and get in service that way and sit in the back of the bus.

David 57:33

I hate, what kind of shit is I hate the way he was treated, but can we go back to? He got something for a crunch bar. Yes, is that all it was in germany you just had? Did they have nestle crunch back then? I thought it was just a hershey bar it was hershey and crunch wait, what do you mean? Hershey? And they don't have hershey and crunch. It's the aggressiveness that said the word Crunch. It was Hershey and Crunch. It was so aggressive, what?

Britt 57:56

No, it was like the physical onomatopoeia for that word. What Hershey and Crunch it was.

GC 58:02

Hershey and Crunch. I know what it was. I know what my grandfather told me. Did they have? They performed fellatio.

David 58:11

For a Hershey Crunch bar.

GC 58:14

It's not, why not?

David 58:15

a Hershey bar.

GC 58:16

They're not together.

David 58:19

Wait, is one made by Mars. No, I don't know Nestle Crunch, hershey Crunch. So you said Hershey Crunch, it's Nestle Crunch.

GC 58:29

I never said Hershey, did he just say a Crunch bar? I don said a.

Britt 58:31

Hershey bar and then a Crunch, I don't know.

GC 58:33

I don't know who said what. Anymore, I don't really want to argue about the candy.

Britt 58:36

I just want to focus on the fact that there was candy.

David 58:37

Yeah, I want to find out like how and which German Was it? Little Children, because? They saying once upon a time my grandfather was a damn war hero.

GC 58:50

Thank you, he was a cook.

David 58:53

But he was a war hero.

GC 58:57

He made that salad for the soldiers and look, and so when he came back to the United States of America he had to sit in the back of the bus. After all that fighting he did over there and the fellatio he received from the Crunch and Hershey, they didn't have Reese's.

David 59:16

And he got. So he got the fellatio From the most racist Nation ever. No, he was in France. Oh well, why was he fighting French people?

Britt 59:33

He was stationed in France. What are you talking about? But he was cooking.

David 59:37

But he was cooking, he wasn't fighting. You said battling, but then you said he was a cook.

GC 59:41

He did both.

David 59:42

Alright. So I think what we're trying to get at is America sucks because they didn't treat them well when they came back.

GC 59:52

I'm just telling you how unfair this was.

David 59:54

I'm just saying okay, so what we're getting at is that Hershey bars are chocolate, but Nestle Crunch has the crispy things in it.

Britt 1:00:00

It'd be like if All Quiet on the Western Front and Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory had, it was All Quiet until they heard the Crunch man. That was Exactly, and when it goes crunch, you know somebody's getting a little action. Yeah, it's either that or the dead body falling on the barbed wire. David.

David 1:00:18

Because With a crunch bar hanging out of her pocket.

Britt 1:00:21

Yeah.

David 1:00:21

What about?

GC 1:00:22

Almond Joy Was that out? I don't know if he got. I don't think he gave them all.

Britt 1:00:26

Don't talk about my grandfather.

David 1:00:31

Almond Joy, I just thought that sounded like my grandfather's name. We got it.

GC 1:00:36

Did you?

David 1:00:36

get it. Yeah, I got it. See you pick it up, it's not that dry.

GC 1:00:39

It was a little moist, it was a little damp, it was a little humid. That was a sticky joke.

David 1:00:49

Funky. Okay, well, I just you know. I just you know if I, if I'd have known that that's all it took in the service To get fellatio was a crunch bar, I'd have joined, but they didn't tell me that.

GC 1:01:02

This was World War II. Those people were suffering Over there. What are we talking about?

David 1:01:06

Why didn't you give him something else? You just gave him a crunch bar. That's not nutritious. Hey, listen, you calling my granddaddy a liar. I'm just saying that they had rations that he could have given them something like I don't know an apple, we're not going to give him a sweet potato. Our chocolate. I think we can all agree that our chocolate it's got a lot of beta carotene, which is really good for the antioxidants?

GC 1:01:31

No, he gave them a crunch bar and vitamin D.

David 1:01:35

Vitamin. He gave them the big vitamin.

Britt 1:01:40

Was it 10,000 milligrams.

David 1:01:43

Was it 50,000 milligrams?

GC 1:01:45

I'm just telling you what my granddaddy said it's a much different sized pill. Did it. Oh, you should see my granddad.

Britt 1:01:52

Well, that's, I'm good.

David 1:01:57

That's no disrespect, no, disrespect, no, he's a good looking dude.

GC 1:02:02

I mean he was good looking. All right, he was, he was that guy. I mean, I believe you.

David 1:02:07

Was he Irish?

Britt 1:02:11

I mean that's a valid question. He I mean that's a no, but he was into the irish, though he was into the irish they weren't a little bit yeah huh they weren't a part of it they were part of his history.

GC 1:02:21

Oh no, no, that's when he he was in the navy, and so oh wait this story keeps getting better.

David 1:02:27

So he was oh, he was battling the germans. Wait, he was in France. He was a cook. Now he's on a boat, yeah.

GC 1:02:33

No, did he ever land there? Yes, are you sure. And then he was on top of that, on top of that, on top of that.

David 1:02:41

He was in the Battle of Midway. Well, that's not in France, Midway between what and what, but he went to France before he went to Midway.

GC 1:02:48

You just think they parked the boat when they just didn't get the fuck off. Get back on then that's what they did.

Britt 1:02:54

They don't park a boat all right, you know what I mean. They anchor.

GC 1:02:58

Yeah, they anchor the boat when they pull in a port of call.

Britt 1:03:01

No, I'm just being a dick because David is being a dick and I felt like he was lonely, being a dick by himself.

David 1:03:06

Isn't it fun, dick by himself. It's so much better to be a dick than the hero. It's way better. I love it. I love being evil, but I don't understand.

Britt 1:03:13

Well, I want to be a dick too. No Come on.

David 1:03:17

You can't be. You can be a dick whenever you want, because nobody's a dick if all three of us are dicks. That's true. That's why I hate it.

Britt 1:03:25

True story it cancels each other out. It's like a weird chemical reaction where all three of us are no longer dicks. We're the nicest people in the world because we're all dicks, so none of us are dicks.

David 1:03:35

I hate it when people say everyone's special.

Britt 1:03:39

I'm like, well then, no one's fucking special, then no one's special, thank you.

David 1:03:41

Thank you for saying that I can't stand that phrase.

Britt 1:03:44

I really like that. We live in a meritocracy where everybody exhausts themselves on a comparative level, where, where, everybody exhausts themselves on a comparative level when everybody gets a trophy, everyone gets a trophy, yeah oh, where we all live and fester in our own insecurities.

David 1:04:00

Well, that is me.

Britt 1:04:01

It's great.

David 1:04:02

That is me.

Britt 1:04:03

It's awesome. It does wonders. You know what's funny. We ended this show like 10 minutes ago and then this was the best part.

David 1:04:15

It really is. We really we got into the nitty-gritty, yeah, we got into crunch bars oh, no, that's it, I okay we're done. We're done why? Why are you getting so offended?

GC 1:04:26

why are you getting offended? Why are you being a?

David 1:04:28

snowflake. Why are? Are you being a millennial snowflake right now?

Britt 1:04:33

What would someone do for a mallow bar.

David 1:04:36

Probably I would just suck on your toe. Yeah, are we?

Britt 1:04:40

still recording? Is that still happening Is?

GC 1:04:45

it real.

Britt 1:04:45

Are we still? Yeah, we still.

GC 1:04:47

Hey.

David 1:04:47

Francois, you want a crunch bar? That would be me in France, francois, but you don't sound. You want a crunch bar? That would be me in France, francois.

Britt 1:04:52

But you don't sound. You sound like.

David 1:04:55

I didn't. Yeah, that wasn't French, because I'm American and I changed it last second and it didn't hit anything.

GC 1:05:00

You sound like a? I'm going across the river, I know, and I'm going to get to the crunch bar. This is why I don't do improv.

David 1:05:15

Okay, why I don't do?

GC 1:05:16

improv. Oh my god. Okay, I just want to point out in my story I was the american with the crunch bar.

David 1:05:19

Oh, oh, you, you.

GC 1:05:19

I was like hey, so why is it good for you in my, it's not for my granddaddy, what the fuck what are you even talking about right now? Granddaddy's fine, okay okay, all right, all right. I have you know what? We're not even to do that dumb shit now.

High on Life

David 1:05:30

You know why? Because we just did it. We did do the dumb shit. How high do you?

GC 1:05:34

have to be To sit here and talk about crunch balls and my granddaddy for five minutes.

David 1:05:41

Apparently not high at all, because I'm not high.

Britt 1:05:44

Oh, I'm pretty fucking stoned, I'm high on life.

David 1:05:47

I am high on life. What, what? I'm high on life, no matter what. I'm high on life, are you yeah?

Britt 1:05:53

No matter what time of day, I always see sunshine.

David 1:05:57

That's what all the little young lifers used to say.

Britt 1:05:59

Yeah, my brain just vomited on top of my other brain.

GC 1:06:02

I love you so much, Brent.

David 1:06:05

Yeah, please come back. Especially when you know when we gain a few listeners.

Britt 1:06:13

Other than the stray cat that's outside your door.

David 1:06:16

Get the fuck out of here. Kitty Fuck out. I don't need that listener.

Britt 1:06:22

Thank you for visiting us. Thank you for having me. This was really fun. I could just have fun.

David 1:06:29

There we go. See, I told you I'm bad at this board.

Britt 1:06:32

Hello houseplants.

David 1:06:34

Yes.

Britt 1:06:34

Yes, and coffee mugs.

GC 1:06:36

That's our show. Yes, sir, the music you can talk inside. Yeah, let's take this out.

David 1:06:40

Sorry, sorry, we gotta do this, we always do this. We have outro music and you gotta kind of join in. I always sing, he always complains, I'll do whatever. It's the same thing as we started with you, just kind of add in. Here we go.

GC 1:06:53

I do it at the end.

David 1:07:06

Okay, you can't stop this, you can't clock this now.

GC 1:07:24

I gotta pee.