Don't Let Life Happen To You

If you are anything like me, you can likely point to 3-5 decisions in your life that you are putting off for many reasons – one may include, what you think others will think about you and your decision.  This is a guide on how to beat that desire and make life happen – instead of letting life happen to you.

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Welcome to Where We've Gotten So Far – follow our progress real-time while we follow yours! All our thoughts and actions are real time and happening at a moments notice.

My name is Matt – I used to be fat, depressed, and addicted to porn. Now, I am 23, an associate at a premier venture capital firm, and avid runner, swimmer, and lifter. I am now a fit, porn-free, and incredibly results-driven entrepreneur who wants to help others do the same thing!

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Transcript

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I just got done having dinner with one of my good friends who I met through through business, and we're talking about decisions, decisions we make every day, about life changing situations. All right, so many of us, we reach a place in our life where we're not successful. We want to be successful. We realize we're not and some of us get defeated. Some of us feel defeated, because the only way you can be defeated is if you feel it, the champions do not accept defeat. Winners don't accept defeat. I mean, really the the act of winning in business and in life, much like people like Alex hormozi and others say, is that winning is staying in the game isn't winning the game. So as soon as you quit, you lose. And if, if you're in the game, if you stay in the game, if you stay in life, then you are winning. You have won until you decide to quit, and that's when you lose. So a lot of people in life, they let life happen to them. And something I was communicating to my friend was, very few people take life by the reins. Very few people look at their situation consciously decide what they want to happen and make it happen. And I'd say for the majority of people, they are armchair decision makers, right? And it's, it's attractive because, let's just say, something happens during your career. Well, it was the market. I got laid off because of the market. There's a there was a recession. Well, that's, that's letting life happen to you, right? That's not taking life by the reins. And one of the attractive parts about doing so by by blaming life, is that you're outsourcing guilt. You're saying, life happened to me. It's life's fault, and it's because of life that this happened. It's not my fault, you know? It's the markets fault, right? Life happened, not I happened. And I think the most successful people in the world and the happiest people in the world, they take ownership, and they change, they work to change their lives, and that's taking life by the reins. So I would encourage you all to do that. You're out. You're probably playing off decisions in your life, and if you put off a decision, it's the same as letting it happen to you, right? And a lot of us make decisions, and decisions meaning we don't make decisions even that's a decision, and the reason we do so is that we fear other people's opinion of us. We say, what are they? What are they going to think when I'm making 500 bucks a day, and all my friends are wearing Rolexes, right, making 500k and they already have carried interest and all this crazy stuff. What are they going to think when I'm pulling up in a kind of a beater car for a few years, until I get things figured out? Because I'm taking a bet on myself. So many of us, we don't even know what we're affected by. This fear. We put ourselves in this box, this decision making box is, well, how do I please others, right? And it's no wonder why we look at our lives when we say we're living in service of things. We're living in service of others, right? A lot of us buy quote, unquote, assets like houses and cars and relationships via things so friends that only come when there's something to do, right, friends that you can't rely on to console you. But rather, hey, we're going to amakase. Oh, I'll go to that. Right? So a lot of us build these things detracting from us, and ultimately, we're in service. We're working 1015, 20 hours a day in service of others, instead of us and our family, right? And there's a good form of selflessness. Hey, I want to treat my friends because they've they've been amazing to me, and that they helped me when I was down. But then there's another thing I want to impress these people, and that's when selfless becomes selfish, that's living in service of others. So so many times, we're making decisions based off of what others think of us. But the catch is, we're making decisions based of what we think others will think of us. So there's us, and then there's other people. Those are two entities, and then that, then there's what others think of us and what we think that is. So it's what we've. Think others will think of us. That's a third entity. It's it's no one. No one is that entity. That's a fake thing. It's some nebulous construct of society that you've, you know, erected in your mind that you are in service to. You're in service of, this ethereal being that is the supposed thoughts of others, and we're living every day. We're making decisions about our future, for our children, for ourselves, in service of this thing. What is it? I don't know. Can you define it? Is it the collective effervescence? I live for yourself, live for your family, live in service of others, and make sure it's the correct form of selflessness which is out of desire to help, desire to encourage and not not the desire to impress. And so I encourage you to take life by the reins. Don't let life happen to you. Life is too short to roll with the punches. You gotta hit back, and you gotta plan your hits. I'm gonna do this. I'm gonna do these three things. I know you're probably putting off three to five big decisions in your life because you're fearful. I'm probably doing the same thing, which is, I'm gonna do this right after the call and make decisions, because no decision is a decision. So make the hard decision, make the hard choice, complete what needs to be done, because you'll thank yourself because you're making life, you're making your life, you're constructing your life, and not letting the pieces fall where they may, not letting life happen to You. You happen to life. Life forms around your decisions, not the other way around. Don't be passive, be proactive. And that goes for work, that goes for family, that goes for relationships, everything. Don't wait for your significant other to return your affection, right? Keep showering, keep showering the affection, the selflessness, the acts of service, right? Don't wait for your business to generate revenue. Go and get the sale, get the revenue, make it happen. The keys are in your hands. That's the, really, the greatest gift. God gives us His autonomy. And a lot of us like to eschew the autonomy because we can blame him. We're ultimately blaming God when we blame our circumstance, and that's one of the biggest disrespects of his massive gift that He's given us, which is autonomy and agency over our lives, the ability to act, the ability to do evil as the Same as the ability to do good, the ability to make decisions, and also the ability to make the decision not to choose, which is in itself, another decision. So that's the thought for today. Keep pushing. It's hard. You know every day is a push, and there are some days where it's easier than others, and some days you feel fulfilled, others you don't. But I encourage you to thank God for the little things. Thank you for the road you're driving home. Thank you for thank him for the gift of autonomy, the gift that He's given us, to be able to take life by the reins and make a life that of our choosing, make a life of his choosing. We're not automatons, so think about that this week and try to make those decisions, make those decisions that you're paying off and that's it. Thanks, guys bye.