9: Overcoming Envy and Jealousy in Medicine

Hey there! It's Inga Hofmann, host of the Heal the Healers podcast, and I'm thrilled to dive deep into a topic that's often swept under the rug: envy and jealousy within medicine, especially academic medicine. Caution this episode might trigger you. That’s good. Triggers make us think and explore areas where we need to grow.

Have you ever found yourself feeling envious of a colleague's achievements, whether it's academic milestones, career advancements, or goals reached before you? Trust me, you're not alone. But here's the thing: these emotions can hinder our personal and professional growth if we don't address them.

In this thought-provoking episode, we're going to explore what the Bible has to say about envy and jealousy and how they can impact our lives in medicine. I'll shed light on the root causes of these emotions and, most importantly, share practical strategies to overcome them.

Let's face it, nobody really talks about this topic, but it's crucial for our well-being and the overall environment in medicine. I'll guide you through the process of repentance, forgiveness, and understanding our God-given assignments, all while encouraging you to submit your thoughts to Christ.

So, get ready to talk about a topic nobody wants to touch and gain a fresh perspective, break free from the chains of envy and jealousy that are holding you back and getting you off assignment, and create a healthier, more supportive medical community. 

00:00 Introduction to the Topic of Envy and Jealousy

07:04 Personal Experience with Envy and Jealousy

10:06 The Impact of Envy and Jealousy on Personal and Professional Life

14:58 Biblical Perspective on Envy and Jealousy

20:41 The Consequences of Envy and Jealousy

30:29 How to Overcome Envy and Jealousy

34:56 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

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Transcript

0:00

Have you ever felt envious or jealous of someone? Perhaps somebody did something or achieved something and you felt envious or jealous because of what they accomplished that you might wanna have to do? And that is exactly what I wanna talk about in this episode today as medicine, especially academic medicine is literally full of it. So stay tuned for after the intro and we'll be right back. Welcome to the Heal the Healers podcast, where we explore the intersection of faith and medicine. Discover your God-given potential and experience Christ's healing in the midst of medical burnout. I'm your host, Ingar Hoffman, a pediatric key mock doc, physician, coach, and follow of Jesus. Together we will navigate the challenges of medicine, integrate faith into our personal and professional lives. Experience, spiritual renewal and find restoration in Christ. Welcome to the Heal the Healers, where Christ heals one physician and one patient at a time. Well, welcome back to another episode of Heal the Healers, and I'm your host, Inga Hoffman. It's excited to be with you today, and today I wanna talk about this topic of envy and jealousy. It's actually a topic that I had covered. Back on my other podcast, the Academic Revolution, about maybe six months ago or so, and it's really something that grabbed onto my heart that I was very passionate about at the time, sharing, and I felt I should share On the Heal the Healers Show, to dive a little bit deeper in some of the principles that I just captured from a biblical perspective and why I actually got excited about talking about this topic in the first place. So I would encourage you check out though the episode on. The Academic Revolution Podcast and go take a listen. It might be a little bit different than what I talk about today, but it definitely will go line in line with it, and I think it's a great episode to just encourage you and to learn about how envy and jealousy shows up in academic medicine. So the reference to the show is right here. Go to the Academic Revolution Podcast. It's episode number 46. Jealousy and Envy. In academic medicine is the title. You can find it on any podcast platform. It is not on YouTube. I'm only on podcast platform for that show, and I encourage you again to take a listen. So let's dive in today though and talk about envy and jealousy and medicine. I personally have found that that is a very prevalent issue across The medical system across medicine in general, but particularly probably in academic medicine. Now, a little bit of a disclaimer. All I have ever experienced is academia. I do not know other ways. That means I have never been in private practice. I don't know how the backend of things looks like there, but I can tell you from an an academic medical perspective, envy and jealousy is Interwoven inter in into our entire system. And honestly, it's not a surprise because in many ways how the academic system is set up, it is set up based on competition, right? It is set up in a way that when you do science, especially if you have a research component to your salary, that it is set up that you have to secure your funding and to your salary. Based on your research productivity, which in turn is based on funding grant funding, manuscripts, right? Publish or perish mentality, and that feeds in general a competitive environment. Now, don't get me wrong, healthy competition is actually a good thing. I think that's fabulous. If we have a little bit of a competitive edge or strive to be a little bit competitive, that's good because that drives the feed of science forward. That makes sure that we are staying on the cutting edge and individually, it's a good motivator as long as it's not coming from a wrong heart. Motivation. Meaning that I'm really out to get the competition right. It's great to say, Hey, let me be pushed and challenged a little bit in my productivity or in my thinking, but it's a whole nother thing when we become very competitive in the way that we are just kind of cutthroat and try to get ahead of other people versus working from a principal of A rising tide raises all ships and we are trying to collaborate. And in my heart, I always believe that if we striving to create a culture of caring and cheering in medicine, we will go a lot further than a competitive environment. But I wanna talk about this issue of envy and jealousy because I have seen how full academia is of that challenge. It's hard to actually see beyond it. Once you've seen it, it's hard to unsee it, and it's, I think, a very destructive. Behavior or emotion because it really it's not good for us when we constantly feel envious of somebody else's accomplishment or jealous. or We constantly, in this comparison game, it actually eats at us. It really eats at us from the inside out. And ly. As a Christian, that is not a good place to be in, in the first place. And as a Christian, in fact, God's word tells us that's not how we should be. In fact, if you go all the way back to Exodus, Exodus 12, Exodus 2017. Tells you and you can read it on the screen here, you shall not cover your neighbor's house. You shall not cover your neighbor's wife or his male and female servant and his ox and donkey, et cetera. You should not be jealous what envious of what somebody else has. And that is right in the 10 commitments. And why is that? It's a good question to reflect on that. I think God very well knew that envy and jealousy. In our heart breeds this greed and self-centeredness, which in turn is very destructive to us personally. It is actually causing a lot of stress. It is destructive to our organization and to humanity in general because greed and self-centeredness is at the root of a lot, if not all of our problems. And that's. Part of our Sin Father and world that we live in, but it's something, as Christian physicians, we have to be fully aware of and set a different example. And I think that's why this is so important. I wanna share a little bit of a personal story to explain to you why this topic became important to me and what happened. You know, a number of years ago I was still at Harvard, at Boston Children's Hospital and you know, I had the pleasure of training at Some wonderful institutions and have worked at amazing institutions, and I love what I do and me too, where I was excited to be in the field. I'm certainly competitive, I would say in, in some degree by nature, but certainly not cutthroat. And so we, we are a little bit more tempered that. I remember that some years ago I had this project I was working on and it was really my baby. It was the passion of my heart. It still is because I created a nonprofit for a rare disease that is deeply Important to me. And I remember at the time I put really all my heart labor my, my love and my labor into this project. And there came a time where I felt wronged by other people taking advantage of or maybe having that project kind of taking advantage of and somebody else takes it over. And I was worried about these things. And this is very common in academia. Especially as a junior faculty member, you worry about these things because you very quickly understand that your productivity and what you have to show for is relevant for your academic promotion and ultimately for your job security. So I honestly was really insecure about those things and I got very envious and jealous and frustrated when I saw that I felt wronged and I was deeply heard, and therefore I was frustrated and operated out of an envious heart. In order to combat that, and that is not a good place to be in. For a while I thought I had actually moved on. I had forgiven that I, I was above that and it was kind of water under the bridge, so to speak. And it wasn't about a year ago that I went through my Christian healing prayer ministry training. And I remember sitting in this atmosphere of. Our prayer ministry training and certainly in a very warm, welcoming, loving environment, and we had our day started. I started with worship and suddenly out of nowhere, I could really not explain the Lord. Really put that on my heart. Inga, there is still a seed here that you need to take care of. There is still a seed of hurt. Unforgiveness, envy, perhaps even greed, jealousy, those kind of things in your heart. And it is a dark, ugly thing. I you can tell it right now. How could I tell that was actually true? To be honest, looking back, every time I counted those people where I felt like I have been wronged and I thought I had forgiven and moved on. My body taught me differently. My body, every time I was in a situation, taught me that I got a little bit maybe Edgy that there was a little bit of a trembling in my voice when I spoke up, maybe because of some insecurity or unforgiveness in my heart. Perhaps there was a sign of a headache that I got an interaction with those people. So my body and my soul could very well tell that not all of that was healed and that I needed to forgive. So as I was in this worship service training as a prayer minister, I suddenly dropped on my knees and was weeping, and I suddenly understood the Lord really showed me. It's time to really forgive. And in that moment, I truly understood the heart posture of forgiveness and letting go and giving it to the Lord because we're asked to forgive. Not for other people's sakes so much, but for our own sake, the Lord Command said we should forgive. And it was so freeing after I. After I prayed that prayer and prayed over those people and really prayed over their lives, wow, it was so freeing and I really felt released from that burden of envy and jealousy that was deep in my heart somewhere that I thought it wasn't even there anymore. So I wanna share this as a powerful statement that you might carry envy or jealousy, even If it doesn't seem to be there on the surface, on deeper roots, and often that is tied to unforgiveness, and it's very important that we forgive those things and release them to the Lord and ask the Lord for forgiveness and forgive those people maybe that have wronged us so that we can move on. And that's critical for us to live a free life and to be a good example for others. And it was really interesting. After that whole experience, I actually went to a conference, the American Society of Hematology meeting, which is coming up. I'm leaving tomorrow. And it was super exciting to see when I went to that conference, I suddenly, because of this. Letting go of envy and jealousy and letting go of any roots of bitterness and unforgiveness I had still in my heart. I think I had a very heightened awareness and I was suddenly able to see. The people's heart, like the Lord sees them. I saw their lives suddenly much more clearly as Jesus would look at them, and that led me. That was a pivotal moment in my life that even led me to do this podcast because I was in a talk and I could sense the. The envy and the jealousy in the room. The bitterness in the roots of unforgiveness where people were struggling and they were trying to overcome those struggles by behavior modification, personal development, and I'm all for it. I have trained people and coach people for years, and it's effective to a certain degree, but I could see there was still that hard wound in their hearts that caused. Bitterness and forgiveness, and it was rooted usually in en VR jealousy and I'm, I'm not getting ahead in comparison to others. And in that moment when I saw that and when I felt the pain that was. Really the origin or the root for that. And being in jealousy, I literally wept. I left that conference, I left that meeting that night. I walked back to my hotel room. I could not hold my tears back. And I've dropped on my knees in my hotel room and prayed for those physicians. And that was the heart that started this podcast. And that was a ripple effect for much more things to come. So I'm grateful that God put that on my heart. Because this is how I suddenly had a different viewpoint and perspective. So I wanted to share that as a personal story because perhaps it resonates with you if you have felt that envy or jealousy really got a rude at you, a grip at you. Now that I talked a little bit about how important it is to, to think about it, how often it shows up in medicine. Let's talk a little bit about you now. Why, why do we feel this way and what is envy? When I look up the definition of envy, and I just put a comments here, envy is really a feeling of dis. Content, um, were resentful, longing aroused by someone else's possession or maybe their qualities or their luck. It's sort of looking at somebody else and being envious of something and it's very interchangeable with jealousy, which is perhaps though a little bit more of an internal nuanced emotion. Often we use them interchangeably, but ly often is more of an attitude or a feeling that we have in our heart, and then because of an resentment against somebody else. And if you go through the Bible. There was actually numerous stories that portray and demonstrate how angry and jealousy has been really a root of a lot of evil, a lot of bad actions and how we need to combat that. So that's important to remember. What are those definitions and where does it actually come from, and. I have noticed that as I reflected on this, that envy and jealousy in many ways, why are we NBA or jealous? Usually Because number one, there is a bit of a comparison game going on, right? And woe is medicine full of that, especially if you are in academia, there is constantly this comparison go. Going on is, is that person ahead of me? How am I measuring up? That's why people feel like they're not good enough. And that's how this whole thing with the imposter syndrome, which I really have a very different opinion about this. Topic for another show, but where that comes up, right, where people say, I feel like I'm imposter, or I'm not good enough. What people are really is constantly measuring themselves up and comparing themselves to others, and then we get envious or jealous. Now, why do we do that? I. It's typically not because they are doing something that we never wanted to do or never could be doing. So I personally, for example, don't like running. So if you are a marathon runner, I admire you. Because it's something I'm totally not into, but I would never jealous or envious about it because that's just not my thing. So, but if there's something, like the example I gave a research project on a patient population that is so dear, gripping to my heart, if I see somebody else doing something in that area, maybe even with materials that I build heavily, well then I might be envious or jealous because. I feel I should be doing this, and you have to ask yourself the question, then that's a very hard, honest question. Why am I not doing it and why is somebody actually getting ahead? And that can have a lot to do with how I personally approach things perhaps. I was able to do it, but I just didn't get my act together. Perhaps I dropped the ball. I wasn't as productive. Perhaps I was too afraid to do it. There could be a numerous number of reasons, and I want you to think about that because that is really important. That is often a clue. Typically we are not envious or jealous of somebody doing something that we didn't have excitement for ourselves. And that is where the rubber meets the road. So often it's something we wanna be doing or we think we should be doing, and that's why we get envious or jealous if we see somebody else doing something or has something that we want. Now, and that is actually a good foundational question to ask yourself. Number one, why is that and is that the right thing to do? Obviously, it is not correct. As a, as a Christian physician, we know better, right? We know that and we are in jealousy, are rooted in, in evil, right? They are not a quality of Christ. Christ was not envious or jealous. Now God is jealous for us in a good way. He is jealous. He has zeal and jealousy for us because we wants us and wants everyone, everyone, none to perish and all to be saved. Right? There's numerous scriptures that describe God's. Jealousy for us in a positive way. It's like a God that is jealous, like a mom that is jealous for their baby. They want no harm to come to them. And that is a topic I actually wanna unpack another time about the jealousy of God and what I learned about it over time. But what I'm talking about is the jealousy that we know, Not good is not from the Lord and something we should come back against. In fact, let's look at a scripture to understand for us to understand how evil it is, how we should not be living that way. Now, having said that, jealousy and envy are part of human emotions and they're part of our sinful nature. That is part of who we are, but. Meaning, we all feel these things. You cannot just take an eraser, but we can train ourselves to overcome those things. And I'm gonna talk about that towards the end. Well, what should we actually do? But let's talk for a moment, is why is it important to talk about the in jealousy, number one? Obviously it is unbiblical. So let's look at a scripture that highlights a little bit what Bible says about envy and jealousy. You can look at Galatians five 19 to 21. So when you look at these verses, I have them up here, you can see that envy and jealousy is right there in the middle of acts of the flesh, sexual immorality, impurity, departure, adultery, witchcraft, hatred, discord. Jealousy. All these things are listed right? Angry, drunkenness, orgies, and the alike. These are listed at evil as evil things. He has the continuation of that force, and Paul warns the Galatians and says, I warn you. As I did before, so this is not the first time he's bringing this up to the Galatians that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God. Now, that's a pretty harsh word if you think about it. Paul is very clear that if you live this lifestyle, if you live in immorality and in witchcraft, and the sexual immorality and impurity, and in envy and jealousy. You will not inherit the kingdom of God. Now, I'm not talking and I'm thinking, I'm believing. This is not talking about, I'm slipping here. I had an envious thought. This is a consistent thing, but I wanna highlight this because it is very serious. We cannot live a life with Full of greed and envy and jealousy. That is not a life that is centered around Christ. That is a life out of our flesh, and Jesus died for that. So we need to overcome that. So that is really important. So it's very unbiblical. In other words, maybe to look at is just what, what did Jesus say about it? Mark 7 21 and will share with us this one. oUt of our person's heart that evil thoughts come. So we are talking about E Jesus, talking about evil thoughts, and again, it lives it's list of similar things, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed, malice deceit Lana Envy, slender. Arrogance, Foley and so forth. All these evils come from inside and defile a person. And that demonstrates to us that all these things are coming from our inside, right? They're coming from our dark places of our heart, and we must come against them. And the blood of Jesus can cover those things. But our opportunity is to just our opportunity, our really desire must be to overcome that by blood of the lamb by submitting our thoughts to Christ, et cetera. So we know from the Bible that envy and jealousy are rooted and evil, and that they are actually very serious and no better than being a murderer or an adulterer. And I think sometimes we think. These kind of things that are up here in our head are sort of, well, they're just my human emotions. Like, no, they are quite as serious as all other sins listed. There's no. May sin and you know that, but I think it is important to sometimes reflect on that and be really serious and say, goodness, I need to get a hold of this because not only is this biblical and Jesus and Paul call it out, but it is also having a very negative consequence on me and on my emotions because guess what? When we are sitting in these emotions, in this case, angry or jealousy. We suddenly become circumspect about all the things going on around us, right? Is this person gonna screw me over? Am I gonna get scooped here? And if you look in academic medicine, at least you see this all over the place, people are now scared to share anything. They're very hush hush, right? Sometimes in talks, they will say, well, we found this interesting thing, but I'm not gonna tell you about it. Because maybe you're gonna scoop me. That's the attitude we often see, and that is coming out of an envious and jealous heart. And it's not good. That's why there's a lot of broken pieces in academia. That's just one tiny example. So we must get rid of it. The second reason why it's important to really talk about this, it's because it's holding us back and it's hurting us. So I talked a little bit about already how it is hurting us. I think one thing I would wanna add is that envy and jealousy, if you keep on lingering in those emotions feed them, you will suddenly see envy and jealousy everywhere show up in your life. And it is literally Eating you alive and it actually can make you physically sick. These thoughts, right? If you constantly live the comparison game and never feel good enough, you're gonna not feel good about yourself. And that is an identity issue. In Christ. We know our identity and it should stand above the identity I have as a physician, as a researcher, my identity in Christ is above all that, and that is something. You might have to work on to really say, I'm putting off the old. The old has died on the cross. Jesus died for it, and I'm putting on my new life in Christ. And you might have to constantly remind yourself because if we live in this place, it can make us physically and mentally sick and ill, and I don't want that for you. I have been there and I don't want that for you. So that's a second reason. It can also hold us back. In a way that we constantly work on that comparison game and then we are never able to actually stay our course and stay in lane. Let me give you a practical example. If you think about, let's say academic, not academic, Olympic swimming competition, right? If the swimmer swim in the lane, were runners. It doesn't matter which sport, but somewhere where there is multiple people racing for a finish line. If the person who is in the lead leans over and looks, what is the person my competition next to me doing? Guess what? Often they then get an advantage in that very moment because when we run the comparison game, we are losing track. We are losing momentum, we are losing our edge, we are losing our focus, and in fact, losing focus and productivity is what I see. Every day in academic medicine, very often rooted in envy and jealousy and comparison games. And I coach so many people on that and that's how I, you know, how I observe this. And I have been in that place too. And it's a very unproductive behavior that is not only detrimental to yourself, but also to the career and obviously to your relationships around you. And lastly, the third big reason I wanna mention is that if you Want to be a leader, and chances are, if you're listening to this, if you are in medicine, you are a leader in your sphere of influence and leadership is really struggling. We need good leaders in medicine. We need to rise up. And show God given leadership with servant leadership principles. And if we are leading them from a perspective and from a heart of envy and jealousy and act like that and, and compare and be jealous and envious and circumspect of other people around us, that they screw us over or scoop us or whatever, we are not gonna be an effective leader. And it will show in your conversation in your. Communication in your relationships, and that will be a very insecure leader. And chances are, if you think about it, you can think about such person. I found it very interesting that envy and jealousy is perhaps not so much an issue when you're a resident or fellow because I feel like. At that time in your training, you deal with it a little bit less. Yeah, you have some comparison, but you're sort of stuck in your training lane and there's not too much give or take, right? You just wanna do well, but once you go out as an attending, I have noticed that, and we in jealousy game because of how academia is set up, is really ramping up. And in fact, if you think about it. The leaders that you have looked up to, they're typically the good leaders that you aspire to be. That person, they usually don't have insecurity, envy, and jealousy issues, but those that are struggling, I see this a lot. Guess what? At the root there's a lot of envy and jealousy and insecurity, and that is, again, an identity issue to still struggle with. Am I good enough? Now, as a believer, as person as follow of Jesus, your perspective is very different because your identity is not rooted on your next paper. Your identity is rooted in Christ. And what he has done for you and what he wants you to do. And this brings me to my last point. What are we gonna do about it? Well, number one, if you notice that that has come up for you, and just as we're talking here, I. Repent from it, really bring it to the Lord and say, Lord, I'm sorry. I need to repent from these thoughts, and I need to ask for your forgiveness, and perhaps you need to forgive some people. Like I told you in my story, that have wronged you in the past. That is one of the worst things I recommend, and then I would pray. For clarity that God really shows you what is beneath it. Why is this happening? And more importantly, I mentioned envy and jealousy usually shows up because maybe something that we are interested in doing. You really need to ask yourself this very important question, how is this that I'm envious about related to me? then the second more important question is, how is this related to my God-given assignment? And here's the thing, we, I believe we're all here. God planted us in this moment in time, in this place, in history for a purpose, and he has an assignment for you and me, for each and every one of us to fulfill on this earth he created you for a very unique. Skill, with your skill, with your, with your qualities to do a job for him. And we are all very uniquely positioned, right? The body of Christ talks about we are part of one body and we each have different worlds. And when we know that again in our identity and we know we have a unique God-given assignment, guess what? Come Heaven. No, hell, nobody. We'll be able to take that assignment away from you and God will want to make sure you walk it out. Now, you might be endless or jealous because you wanna stick here over in this lane that isn't actually your lane. So if that's the case, you really need to pray for clarity. God, what is my assignment? What do you want me to do? And is this even something that I should be getting involved in? Perhaps it's not. And if it's, and your certain, and your heart and your Holy Spirit, you know, and the Holy Spirit, you know, this is my God-given assignment, guess what? It doesn't matter what other people do. There's no competition because you have your assignment. You need to run your lane. You and I need to run and stay in that lane, and actually envy and jealousy when we look to the side, is one of the key ways the enemy is trying to get off of. Simon, did he hear me? When you get envious or jealous about something, that's a way for the enemy to get you off assignment, if that was something you were supposed to do. Or just a pure old good distraction by him. So be very mindful. What am I envious and jealous about? Is it in my assignment lane? Then don't worry, God gaudio. And if it isn't, well what are you doing there in the first place? You need to get off and you need to take a hard look at what you're actually doing. That is really the core of the issue very often, that we are running races that are not ours to run, and I had to learn that over and over and over again. So that's really important. And then the last part is number four. So repent. Ask for forgiveness, forgive other people. Know your lane to run. Okay? Know your assignment. And number four, submit. Your thoughts. When that enemy and jealousy comes up, submit it unto Christ. Okay? So submit and hold every thought captive unto Christ. We have been given the mind of Christ, and your job is when these things come up, when these emotions and thoughts come up, don't let them run haywire and let them control you. You hold them captive. Unto Christ and really pray over that. I pray over that every day because we all struggle with that and that's one of the most important things you can do. So I encourage you with this, please go back, reevaluate where and re in jealousy has shown up and how to overcome it. So I ask you, God bless you. And keep you share and subscribe to the show and share it with other people, and also encourage you if you are not sure what your assignment is, like stay in touch. I'm working on some things to actually help people with discipleship and mentorship around all these things. I'm going to release that in January. I want to have a community of like-minded physician where we can all hold each other accountable, grow in spiritual discipline, in our Bible, knowledge and learn. Okay, this is my assignment here is how am I positioned in medicine and work together to fulfill your calling, my calling to make medicine a better place and bring the. Kingdom of God back to the medical world so that we can actually bring a culture of caring and sharing, help more patients, help our colleagues. So with that I bless you today. Really think about these things and encourage you, and I will see you next week. My prayer is that you were encouraged, strengthened, and perhaps even convicted with this episode today. If this podcast has blessed you, would you help share it with your friends and colleagues and even share it on social media? Also, leave us a review on the podcast platform where you are listening to this content. It would help us a lot. Together we can share the good news of Jesus and transform medicine one physician. And one patient at the time. Have a great day. God bless.