Kings of The Road
We are two friends who went on a road trip around the United States 20 years ago to serve churches. We kept a journal as we traveled and are reading through the journal and remembering our adventures. Listen and laugh with us as we go back in time and inspire others to go on an adventure.
Kings of The Road
Florida: Unforgettable Gulf Adventures and Heartwarming Holiday Moments
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
What’s the secret to a truly hilarious wedding tradition? Discover how Scott Hawkins and I, Andrew Gaer, manage to keep our friendship fresh with a unique ritual: one free slap at each other’s weddings. We reminisce about our latest social media sensation, the tortilla slapping challenge, that had everyone in stitches, and my often futile attempts to keep a straight face amidst Scott's antics. This episode is packed with laughter, as we navigate through our camaraderie and the silly moments that define our bond.
Relax with us on a perfect day at a private beach club on the Gulf, enjoying the pre-set chairs, towels, and the carefree charm of golf cart rides with Scott and Judy. Tune in as we recount intense euchre games where Judy's competitive spirit shines, and look ahead to Thanksgiving in Estero, Florida, starting with the Macy's parade. Finally, indulge in our spirited debate on the greatest dip of all time, and imagine the ultimate dip-only party. Plus, hear the heartwarming Thanksgiving story hosted by the remarkable 84-year-old former Rockette, Rita, proving age is just a number when it comes to bringing joy and togetherness. Join us for an episode filled with laughs, nostalgia, and mouth-watering dip discussions.
Hello and welcome to Kings of the Road time. You are in for a journey through the swamp of Florida, humidity buds, covered pools. You're with Scott Hawkins, me, andrew Garrett Thou, who does not speak until the news against thee, and we are in Florida. If you have not yet Facebook, like Instagram, like subscribe, let us know. If you are going to want to defend your state, let us know. We are so glad that we can do this together and the music's over so you may now speak, andrew. Oh man.
Speaker 2That's good. It's an exercise in patience, or?
Speaker 1something Everyone's anticipating. They're waiting. They're like ugh, cannot wait for Building. The tension it was. It was spectacular. So we just have to hang out on sunday of labor day and if you haven't yet seen the slapping video, you should go to our facebook page and watch the tortilla slaps and then our kids tortilla slapping.
Speaker 2It's all pretty funny, it's, it's pretty it's, it's pretty good and, as you said that out loud, I'm like a lot of our friendship is based on slaps in the face it's a droop, it's true.
Speaker 1Actually, as we were doing, I thought, oh, we've done this before. It's a much more painfully than a tortilla. Yeah, a tortilla is a funny soft sort of like, but also like it does a good sound. Some of the kids they got it. It does a great sound, but no one's crying.
Speaker 2No one's crying. Yeah, nobody's eyes are watering. Afterwards no handprints on the face.
Speaker 1If you don't know what we're talking about I think we've talked about this before.
Speaker 2Oh, yes, as far as the other kinds of slaps. Scott and I have an agreement, yes, where at any wedding where both Scott and I are present, we have one free slap in the face Yep and the other person can't get, mad, can't get mad. It's just, it's agreed upon, so it just happens. We know that at some point in that evening I'm going to get slapped in the face. He's going to get slapped in the face.
Speaker 1That's just the way it goes, and I guess, to our friend's credit, our friends have still stayed married and so we haven't had any second marriages to go to. Our kids are not yet of the marrying age, so we don't have those. But there's coming a day and it's not close, but it's not as far as it was. Yeah, where like a.
Speaker 2Katie Conrad just married somebody, and we're definitely both invited to that.
Speaker 2We've got a couple years. Before our kiddos are there, I've started my new wave of weddings. Oh yeah, like you know, when you're kind of in your twenties, you start going like there was one summer I think I went to five or six, or maybe I was in five or six weddings. There's just so many and it's just like everybody we knew was getting married. Um, and then you kind of go through the period where, yeah, there's less of that right, so now I've got.
Speaker 2I've got some older nieces and nephews, and some of them have been getting married, so does Mary sisters are older. She's number four or five, four, yeah, so she has older sisters, but we don't have the crossover, Not yet, but maybe maybe we should see if.
Speaker 1Do you have one coming up? Do you have any nieces or nephews that are engaged?
Speaker 2I don't, but I was probably thinking the same thing you're thinking If you get invited, let me be your plus one instead. Of.
Speaker 1Emily, I'll just add or the same on the other side, although it would be awkward if your kids and me and you and Mary is like that's my niece. Sorry, you're not allowed to come to this wedding. Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2You're out? Yeah, can I Do I get a plus two? Mary, can I slap you at the wedding?
Speaker 1No, yeah, yeah, megan wasn't able to make it, so we brought Scott instead. He does have to sit at the kids' table, yeah.
Speaker 2Yeah, he has to sit at the kids' table.
Speaker 1But he's in and the slap. I I do want to say and I, as I've been watching those videos I don't know how many times you've watched them, I've watched them a couple because they're fun um, I, I think that this falls into the you are, by default, better at that stuff than I am like mode of the like. I feel like I I'm putting it in the like, acting like keeping it together Like you were on your game man, like you are not breaking. You did the hat turnaround, you did the like like you were I. I got none of that. I, that skillset is Well that that became apparent.
Speaker 2If you watch the video closely, you'll see that we kind of do the. There's a cut and all of the sudden it cuts and my shirt is soaked, and it's because not 15 seconds in, scott is just staring me straight in the face from a foot away and just unleashes his entire mouth full of water. Way, and just unleashes his entire mouth full of water like we just out of the blue, just all of the sudden, just in your face, old faithful geyser upon my face and chest, and I'm like I now have scott's mouth water all over my face, and which is kind of how I thought this would end in general, like but there's a lot, because there's a lot of like dribbling that usually happens in the tortilla.
Speaker 1So the idea, if you haven't seen it, is you fill your mouth with water to like chipmunk style. So not just a little bit of water, but like full as much as comfortable, yeah right and then you slap each other across the face of the tortilla and whoever lets go of the water first loses. And Andrew's just like. You're in your zone, man, you can just lock in, and I'm like I should have known that going into this. I'm entering your wheelhouse, I didn't realize that was a wheelhouse of mine.
Speaker 2I think it is. I just found a real dark place in my mind. And I was like I'm not going to laugh or even smile or even come remotely close to having any joy.
Speaker 1I'm here to win. I think that we're going to have a detour, but I lost, that's the thing when you win, you lose.
Speaker 2I know, because technically you lost by spitting it out, but I'm the guy covered in mouth water so great and I imagined it was going to be a spray like a mist, but it felt like a bucket of water was thrown at me.
Speaker 1I'm like you had a lot of water in there, there's a lot of water in there. I went full chipmunk style. You did. Maybe that was the problem.
Speaker 2I think maybe I could have had room for more water. Oh, maybe Now that I'm just being totally forthcoming with this information.
Speaker 1I tried to do as much as I can and the thing that I was wondering if the kids were doing was, like you could swallow a little bit. You know which I didn't, but I'm like, oh, you could just like you could get a lot down without really being caught probably, but that's not as fun.
Speaker 2Yeah, I think I saw my youngest at one point when she spit it out like hardly anything came out. I'm like oh, you drank that Interesting.
Speaker 1Yeah, oh, I was thirsty. Yeah, yeah, no, it's a good I was okay, so I was thinking next time. Okay, chubby Bunny, because I know Chubby Bunny is not allowed for youth groups, but it could be allowed for because supposedly someone died once. Chubby Bunying, yeah. But like it's still allowed for friend groups, so I was like we do chubby bunny and the kids do chubby bunny. That's a great game. You remember chubby bunny? Oh, of course I do.
Speaker 2I'm just like, do? Yeah, you're looking at me. I'm like, do I want my children to fill their mouths with marshmallows? And of course you do as a like, these are the games that are supposed to take place away from your parents, because if a parent is able and as a parent sending your kid to youth group, you know this stuff is happening, but at least you're not there to know.
Speaker 1You hope it's happening.
Speaker 2So you're just like it's going to happen. But if I'm there present with my kids I'm like do I actually want them to put eight marshmallows in their mouth? Of course you do.
Speaker 1What would be the downside? Choking and dying. But they're not gonna choke. That's what I mean. They're not gonna choke and die. If we're we. How many times we played that with people? No one's choked and died. It hasn't happened. You know who was the best? Who was the best at this game, do you remember?
Speaker 1eric marth ah, he was like freakishly good and that's like 22 marshmallows. I'm like incredibly high amount, gosh. That was just the other thing that we should do and this should be a detour is I've seen this before, but I I just know I'm gonna lose, so I don't know why I'm even suggesting it. But, um, you tell each other like dad jokes or dad jokes, and whoever laughs first, then they go. But this is not even a competition. It's going to be so quickly that I'm going to lose this competition, so I'm not even sure why I'm suggesting it.
Speaker 2I do love those videos, dad jokes out there?
Speaker 1Yeah, yeah, true, true, true. Like do you want to hear a time telling joke? Yeah, oh, nevermind jokes out there. Yeah, yeah, true, true, true. Like do you want to hear a time telling?
Speaker 2joke. Yeah, oh, never mind, you didn't like it. I think I've heard that one before I like that one. It's a solid one and it's just a good one yeah, okay, where are we in the world? Oh, we're in florida. That's right, I started a swamp. We are in muddy, god's waiting Florida, as I like to refer to it. I love it Okay.
Speaker 1The land before time and Janet and Judy are there. Oh man we had lamb last night, mint jelly.
Beach Club Vibes and Thanksgiving Traditions
Speaker 2We are just riding on the tails of luxury. We are In the gated community of Estero, Florida, so today is day 58. It's a Wednesday. It's November 24th 2004. Nice, let's, do we go. Today was a treat. One of the perks of living where they do is the use of the private beach club on the Gulf, just a short drive away. We ate some lunch while overlooking the gulf, then walked out on the white sand to our chairs that had been set out for us. Scott Judy and I played some smash ball for a bit and then we swam in the gulf and it's not correct to call it the ocean, it's the gulf. It's late November, the air is 80 degrees and the water is 70 degrees. We hung out for a few hours and just enjoyed a wonderful day.
Speaker 1Perfect, perfect, smashball. That's a terrible.
Speaker 2Smashball. No, it's Smashball.
Speaker 1Well done.
Speaker 2Thank you.
Speaker 1I haven't played that probably since then.
Speaker 2These. I was reading back and reading ahead and I was like, oh my gosh, these people live on vacation.
Speaker 1Yeah, that's what people think about us too, though, but it's fair, although the chairs being out, everything I mean right, because the problem with the beach is getting all prepared, everything right. Chair towel there, you just walk, it's all there.
Speaker 2Here's your chair, here's your towel yeah, and I don't know if they had a. Do they have a golf cart, or do we just?
Speaker 1hop in their car. It feels like there was a golf cart involved which is perfect Golf cart vibes right Like right.
Speaker 2Imagine just living in a place where you're like oh, let's go down to the beach club, I'll call them up. Hey, we're coming down, oh sure thing Mr. And Mrs Gare, your chairs, will be enjoy white sand in november. November 24th swim in the golf why are golf carts better?
Speaker 1because, like, our neighbor across the street has a golf cart and and it's just better to like drive to the beach, go to the beach. I don't know why it's better. He's like you still have to get in the car, you still have to drive. It's still kind of parking spot and was like do you have to park in the same way? I'm like, no, you do, but for some reason it's just.
Speaker 2It's just got such vacation vibes. Wait, you can drive a golf cart on the street.
Speaker 1Yeah, they're street legal. He has plates and lights and everything.
Speaker 2Oh.
Speaker 1I mean it's a lot of people around here drive.
Speaker 2I mean that makes sense when you're buying a piece. Yeah, like to be like I'm going to run out and grab breakfast and just hop in the golf. It just feels so casual, it feels better, it feels so different, right, I don't know why.
Speaker 1You're like in a car, you're like it's not that much different, but just, they have a seat belt. Yeah, yeah, they have a seat belt. One time the batteries weren't charged enough and we made it like almost all the way home and then it was just like going so slow, and so then I'm like I'm gonna get off and push because I weigh the most right. So I start pushing, we pushing, we have Emily, isaac and Hope, and then push, push, push and then, like we got to a downhill, jump in, go on the downhill, let it go Get the uphill, pretty cool. And at the end Isaac and Hope all were pushing and me and Emily's just steering because we needed something. Oh my gosh that's funny.
Speaker 2Yeah, I don't, I don't know. Like anytime I go camping, there's always people with the golf cart. I'm like, wow, that's, that's commitment. But yeah, I don't know. I've never considered. You know what, where I live, I don't think would be a great golf cart area, but where you live for sure, everywhere.
Speaker 1Yeah, there's so many golf carts I don't agree. Yeah, they're fun, so, yeah, interesting, I was. Just I can't quite figure out it, I can't really figure out why, but it is true it is better, right, like it's better just jumping into a golf cart going. Yeah, yeah, yeah, so vacation mode.
Speaker 2Oh boy, so that was a good, that was a good time. So after dinner, janet, judy scott and I played some intense games of euchre.
Speaker 1Judy gets vicious yes, yes, and you were her partner and she, oh my gosh, she does not let you pull like you those. I think those are still things that you probably need to work through in therapy, because you make a mistake and judy is on you like white on rice and then just like, why would you do that? And you were pretty experienced future player because you just come up a lot in this podcast, but she has years of experience, years and years of playing well, I'm thinking that the first time I ever played was probably back in Michigan with her, so she probably taught me how to play.
Speaker 2And then we've played it a lot in Atlantic City and other places. By this time, time-wise not very experienced, but at this point I knew the game pretty well.
Speaker 1Lots of games, lots of reps, lots of reps, so I knew what I was doing.
Speaker 2But man if you made a mistake, you wouldn't know about it.
Speaker 1Or you didn't call it quick enough, or yeah, all of those things, yeah exactly. Crazy, exactly.
Speaker 2That is the end of that day. Just bliss, relaxation, warmth. Should we go on to the next day? The next day is Thanksgiving. Oh, oh.
Speaker 1Wow, what does?
Speaker 2Thanksgiving. Look like on the road trip in Estero, florida vacation land. Well, friends, let's find out. It's day 59, thursday, thanksgiving, 11-25-04. I woke up this morning and, of course course, began watching the Macy's parade. Yeah, is that a tradition in your household?
Speaker 1Yeah, was it yours yeah.
Speaker 2Uh, growing up? Yes, uh, we. We watch it a little sometimes here and there nowadays, but not always. Have you been, um, still fun? Have I been to the Rose parade nowadays, but not always. Have you been still fun? Those parade have I been to the rose parade? I have, yes, once as a kid, and then I've also gone after the rose parade, which I think is the better to see strategy floats they park all the floats, yeah, in this one high school, I think and then you can go and like walk and get real close to them and see all the details of how they make these floats with all the flowers.
Speaker 2It's spectacular, smells wonderful too. Because you know roses, I recommend it. So after watching the Macy's parade not the Rose Parade we watched some football and the Lions got their butts kicked.
Speaker 1That's unusual, it's just typical, typical, typical. But this year, guys, I'm pumped. I know you're not a ball sports person, but, man, it's going to be a great year. It's going to be a great Lions football year. So Isaac is slowly getting into it. It's good. It's all becoming more and more the dream of sitting and watching the football with the sun and cheering high-fiving. Yeah, it's coming, man, it's coming.
Speaker 2Good for you. Good for you. What would you do if he decided he liked a different team?
Speaker 1Well, I just disown him like you do. That's what the whole point of family is, I see. Put him out to pasture. Although that is my certain children's personalities. The classic story about Grace is the Lions have not been good forever until recently and they had a national game and I was so excited and I said, oh, grace, grace is like five, grace, the Lions are playing on TV tonight. They're actually on TV and she's like, oh, who are they playing against? I'm like, oh, the Dallas Cowboys. And she looks me right in the eyes oh, no, go Cowboys. I'm like, wow, this explains a lot about the next 50 years of my life.
Speaker 2Why can't she let you have nice things? I?
Speaker 1don't know why she's a child, wow.
Speaker 2That Because she's a child. Wow, I have to sit her down and say you know what? Grace?
Speaker 1Isaac, he has a lion's hat he's in.
Speaker 2You're indoctrinating him, get him young, get him young, yeah Well aside from the lion sucking, as usual we ate some chips and dips that Janet and Judy prepared Again. Let's go back to two days ago now, where we are just being. We are just being pampered by Whoever can prove that they're the most hospitable.
Speaker 1I don't know.
Speaker 2I don't know if we were like playing them against each other or they were just doing it on their own. But they're ready. They're ready for that.
Speaker 1They're ready.
The Dip Debate
Speaker 2Yeah, own, but they're ready, they're ready for that. They're ready. Yeah, I said it was a very lazy, chauvinistic sort of morning, like just two dudes ahead of the time, just just two dudes sitting on a couch watching football while these ladies brought us chips and dip. Oh, oh, we didn't know how good we had it yeah send your, send your mail to uh F Hawkins at that's not the way it is now.
Speaker 1in my household, there's not a lot of chip dipping, while women bring me cold beverages.
Speaker 2Question for you. Yes, what is the greatest dip in your mind?
Speaker 1Oh, wow, okay, this is a good question, I really. So I immediately went guacamole because it's it's good.
Speaker 2I thought so I have, I have something in my, I have the right answer and I also have what I thought you were going to say which could also arguably be the right answer let me hear it I thought you were going to say spinach, artichoke dip.
Speaker 1I love that so much too. That's so good yeah I know and I, I, as you said that I felt overwhelmed because all of the options came to my mind and I'm like, yes, yes, yes, yes, like there's not a dip that I looked at and I'm like that with a chip, isn't that?
Speaker 2I feel like there is one that is like the cheat code of dip of dips, though you're gonna say seven layer dip, aren't you. I am going to say seven layer dip. Yeah, I thought it has guacamole, it has beans, it has cheese, it has sour cream, it has other layers yeah, yeah, I'm gonna say that I knew that that was where you go and it's, it's so solid.
Speaker 1But, like you know, they just, uh, my mother-in-law just bought, like this, uh, hatch chili dip from Costco Great, I'm thinking. A buffalo chicken dip, like at the crock pot at parties Yep, great, they're like ranch dip. Ranch dip for vegetables. Block of cottage cheese with some random jam, whatever that is, pour it over, sure, oh. I'm so dippable. Like dips are so good. Are you know what? Yeah, it's hard to pick like dips. I'm starting to think why, like maybe at our next thing when we get together, we only have dips.
Speaker 2No, main course ah, just like a smorgasbord of dips. Just a smorgasbord of dips, yeah just a smorgasbord of dips.
Speaker 1Who's upset about that?
Speaker 2Nobody. Well, that's the problem. Fondue falls into the dip category in my brain too, and that's hot dip.
Speaker 1That's hot, and there's chocolate dip.
Speaker 2Ugh, Dessert dip, Dessert dip. That's some stuff right there. You know um this weekend when we were down at Allison's house we brought these like thin pretzel chip thing.
Speaker 1Oh yeah those are you know what I'm talking about?
Speaker 2Yes, and they had a spinach artichoke dip. Yeah, that combination. I could have polished that off all by myself. Salty pretzel.
Speaker 1Oh man, that was good. Okay, so it's only dips this time. And like creative dips, oh dude, I like dips. Are you guys free this weekend? I know I want to get out right now.
Speaker 2I'm just going to have a private dip party, maybe Just seven dips. Just leave me alone everybody. I'm going into this room with seven different dips.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2Oh, this is an interesting game. You mean like putting tobacco in your lip?
Speaker 1No, no, no no, no, but I don't know why I keep having, like Maryland crab dip. I don't ever had that.
Speaker 2but I was just thinking along those lines. Is ceviche considered a?
Speaker 1dip A hundred percent. Anything you do with a chip, anything that chip is the.
Speaker 2If there's a dip, yeah, you know what Also I love this is you eat this with pita chips, hummus. Hummus is not what I was going to talk about, but great, I love hummus, but the tzatziki it's like the oh yeah Cucumber dip Sounds weird.
Speaker 1Great it is, but that's lower on my list because I want to put that on like a PETA, like I want to put that on like a Euro. Sure, do it Okay.
Speaker 2Recommend that. Oh, dips, trader Joe's has good dips. They do Costco Trader Joe's. Yeah, anyways, we're talking about Thanksgiving, yeah, not just dips. So let's get back to it. For Thanksgiving dinner we went over to the home of Rita and her daughter, holly. Oh, do you remember Rita and Holly? Nope, I remember thinking Holly was an attractive woman.
Speaker 1There I said it. I've been keeping that in all these years. How old is Holly? She's probably in her 50s. Okay, yeah, great, I don't know. Her mom is 84, so do the math. I don't know Her mom is 84,.
Speaker 2So do the math, I don't know. I recently confessed to Mary that there's an actress that I'm like. I don't know why, but when I was a kid I thought she was attractive, and when I was a kid she was like old. No, no, no, no, I gotta think of her name.
Speaker 1I'm not gonna be able to do it. Your celebrity crush's name no.
Speaker 2Yeah, I can able to do every crush's name. No, I don't, this is so. Yeah, I can't even yeah. But she was like okay, I don't know, I just thought that's a, that's a nice looking woman, she was it, I love it. I could appreciate. I'm like I love it. She's. She's quite a bit older than me, maybe older than my parents, but hey, I can appreciate a nice looking woman kind of like, like Holly.
Speaker 2Kind of weird. Yeah, kind of like Holly. Yeah, they are friends. So, rita and her daughter Holly, they are friends of the. Is it Broughtons, broughtons, broughtons, steve and Janet, steve and Janet, and wanted to cook for them. Rita is 84 years old, but I would never have guessed. She used to be a Rockette in New York City.
Speaker 1Oh, what a great reader.
Speaker 2Right, and how apropos for Thanksgiving the Rockettes a staple of the Macy's parade, the Rockettes' famous kickline Absolutely Right For dinner we had turkey stuffing sweet corn from Ohio. I don't know why that is a distinction.
Speaker 1Maybe because they're probably from Ohio. Someone's probably from Ohio because it's the west coast of Florida.
Speaker 2True true, true, cranberries, homemade and canned. Okay, sidebar. Yeah, cranberries. Yes, are you in or are you out? You're in, I'm in.
Speaker 1Do you like the canned? Oh both versions, yeah, one or the other. Which one are you choosing, uh?
Speaker 2homemade. I mean, yeah, I I love the sliced, you love the can like come straight out of the can just give me a slice of that straight into them. It's like heaven, oh it's so good.
Speaker 1I love that stuff.
Speaker 2Such unique foods, I like it yeah, mashed, mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, and then freshly made from real pumpkins, that Holly prepared Pumpkin pie. Maybe that's why I was attracted to her.
Speaker 1I was going to say this is why I had a crush on Holly. I'm like, oh, she made a fresh pumpkin pie.
Speaker 2Like oh man.
Speaker 1You're looking great for her. Let's get married.
Speaker 2Sure Sure, we have a gap in our age. I thought that that wasn't my first wife. Yeah, I didn't, oh nobody knows this on your marriage license yeah, we had some time to kill in florida, so I'm like let's get married, you and me yes, yeah oh man, it was fantastic that meal. They had these two dogs that were hysterical One was a little terrier of some sorts and the other was a mini wiener dog. I realized how much I miss dogs. Hmm, what a day.
Speaker 1Look at that.
Speaker 2We're like three days into Florida and nothing but good things to say. What's happening?
Speaker 1I know why do we remember so poorly, then?
Speaker 2This is interesting, right starts off well, but doesn't continue well.
Speaker 1Well, that's a great question. Yes, um, yeah, I think there's some good pondering. Or is florida just that bad that even these great days, they can't overwhelm the other crappy parts of of the state? Could?
Speaker 2be who knows, yeah, who knows, indeed. But man.
Speaker 1So far, florida, you're showing up, but there is a reason that there's some trauma and it's coming up, so get yourself ready. Does it involve crocodiles? Nobody knows, nobody knows. So see you soon, andrew, I'll have to find out.
Speaker 2All right, scott, until next time. Nobody knows. So yeah, see you soon, andrew. I'll have to find out. All right, scott, until next time. Adios, staying dry over here.
Speaker 1C'est la vie, c'est la vie. I don't think I'm going to say goodbye in other languages.
Speaker 2Au revoir, au revoir.
Speaker 1After a while.
Speaker 2I keep it going, bye, bye.