Kings of The Road
We are two friends who went on a road trip around the United States 20 years ago to serve churches. We kept a journal as we traveled and are reading through the journal and remembering our adventures. Listen and laugh with us as we go back in time and inspire others to go on an adventure.
Kings of The Road
San Antonio Bound with Tunes and Tales
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What happens when two friends hit the road without a crucial RV feature? Join Scott Hawkins and Andrew Gaer as they recount their whimsical road trip escapades, which led them from Walmart parking lots to less-than-glamorous motels. From crafting a ridiculous song about a "pooper tank" explosion to dreaming up a stage musical with Lin-Manuel Miranda or AI, our tales are guaranteed to amuse. We'll share how our knack for funny tunes just might outshine our attempts at romantic songwriting, with plenty of laughs along the way.
Venturing further, we chat about the surprising satisfaction found in being average—like mastering wakeboarding just enough to impress those who haven’t tried it. Society's obsession with comparing ourselves to the best often undermines our unique skills, and we discuss how recognizing our strengths can lead to fulfillment. And of course, our journey wouldn't be complete without a stop in San Antonio, where we reflect on the Alamo's storied past and soak up the enchanting charm of the Riverwalk. Get ready for an episode full of unexpected twists and thoughtful reflections.
Welcome to the best 20 minutes of your week where you get to hang out with myself, scott Hawkins and this average-looking fellow over there, andrew Gare. Because we journey in Texas today and go on a road trip serving churches, sleep in a Walmart parking lot Kings of the Road podcast. We are glad to be together, glad to be on this journey together as we continue heading towards home, because we are minus a pubertane, so we're sleeping now in hotels, actually, because hard to go to the bathroom when you don't have a bathroom with you anymore. And, yeah, journeying back home. So, as you've heard before, didn't taken a turn in the Keys when we got hit from behind. And then we are. We left Tallahassee, spent the night in New Orleans, new Orleans over to Texas.
Speaker 2So, hey, andrew, hey Scott, nice recap.
Speaker 1Thanks for that. Just wanted to make sure everyone knew, because they would be. They're wondering wait a second, you're not sleeping in Walmarts anymore. You're not sleeping in churches? No, we're not. Why Can't, Can't? No pooper tank, no pooper tank.
Speaker 2How important a pooper tank was, shockingly important. You take that for granted, don't you?
Speaker 1You do as you go down the road and enjoy.
Speaker 2From our very first time leaving that we were unsure, if we were going to use the cooper tank mid-road.
Speaker 2And then we definitely did, and we just, like this is did and now, glorious, definitely can't, yeah. So so we left new orleans and we had a place lined up I don't know if this is one that my mom lined up for us, because I recall this place was kind of a hole in the wall like roadside motel. Yeah, yeah, I, I think we must have left new orleans somewhat late or whatever, and we're like we just need to get on the road. Yeah, and we probably had a reservation in san antonio for the next day or something. So we we're like, where's a stop.
Speaker 1This was more of just a stop, I think. Yeah, I don't think this was a. I don't have any memories except kind of like what you just said. I actually think this is where we may have wrote some music in the hotel room, at the Orange Tets' hotel room, we got our guitars and I think we wrote that classic song about the pooper tank explosion that happened and um, remember that song. I wish. I wish we had see nowadays we'd have an iphone to record it too and like. But we were just dinking around with the guitars oh, I forgot all about that song.
Speaker 1I wonder about the. We made him into a character, the guy by the side of the road.
Speaker 2So it was some great lines that we had about him, but it was you're right, oh man, I should go dig out like an old guitar case and see if that oh dude in there somewhere or something. Yeah, see that's.
Speaker 1That's one of those things where it's like, yeah, the GPS, yeah, we didn't have the internet in the same way we do now, but also just the ability to grab your iPhone, hit record. We definitely would have done that for some of these songs, or we would have put them on. Facebook, or we would have put them on like right but nothing. It just exists in our memory.
Speaker 2I wish, I wish Scott, that we had the talents and capabilities to be people who could write musicals. I know, because I think this road trip would make an incredible stage production.
Speaker 1It should, Should we? Should we afford it to Lin-Manuel Miranda? He is very talented at this.
Speaker 2Probably we could just. Yeah, maybe we could just. Can you put a podcast in a chat? Gpt, we could just like upload all 55 episodes. Oh, there we go and be like make a musical and like in about 40 to 50 seconds. It's like here's the script and all the songs this is very good Amazing. Thank you.
Speaker 1AI.
Speaker 2That would be. Yeah. The Poopertank song, the I'm Just a Little Guy, yes there's a lot. We could write songs about South Dakota. That would be very bleak, it would be amazing, it would be a smash hit.
Speaker 1It would be very bleak, it would be amazing, it would be a smash hit it would be, I would be absolutely in awe and I think it would do very well. Yeah, we, it was fun. Those were fun songs. And when I was talking about proposing to Emily I was like, oh, I should, I should write her a song, that'll be so nice. And I tried a couple of times and I realized I can't write serious romantic songs, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1So I was like I can't write serious romantic songs. All of my songs actually turn into like something like so much fun and it's like, oh, that doesn't sound right. And then the words are like all a sudden, something about you know, your whatever, and I was like this doesn't sound good. I, I just read ridiculous songs. So that skill that taylor has, taylor swift or, um, jason moran, all the people have it passed right over me, jump yeah, I so desire that, that talent, but it's just not in there for me.
Speaker 2I don't know. I do like to believe and maybe this is my ridiculous optimism and you know sort of way of of life of like, yeah, I could probably figure this out too. I feel like, if I put enough time into it, like I probably could do it, but I'm just never gonna do it. Yeah, I, I don't't know. I think we could be composers.
Speaker 1That might be like the backflip on the wakeboard.
Speaker 2Oh yeah, I never even got close to that. That's true.
Speaker 1Where we get to a certain level, where we're like that's fun, yeah, oh, that's a good. But anybody else is like, oh look, they can get up. Oh look, they can turn that is true.
Speaker 2I've tried I don't know how many times to do a flip of any sorts on a wakeboard, and I can do a like a three-quarter flip pretty good, yeah, but I've never gotten any past the worst time to flip to do.
Finding Satisfaction in Average Talents
Speaker 1It's very painful. Three-quarter to half a flip is the worst. So I have a question for you and I. This is because orange tets is okay, we stayed there, we'll go, san antonio said, are the? There are some things in life that I feel like, um, if you're okay, so the I'll start to the end point. What percent of like talent on the weight board do you think you are better than 20 of the population, better than 40 of the population? You know what I mean, like your skill level, and let's just say your best, your best, run right you had some good runs.
Speaker 1When we had third day you had one that was really good. You were really good. You were in the group Because I go ahead, so what do you think?
Speaker 2We're talking the whole population.
Speaker 1Yes, People who have been on boats, not like, let's talk random, like. African people that's a key point like okay, so I'm saying people who aren't, they're up, pulled behind the boat, but they're just like boat boaters.
Speaker 2they've gone on boats, they've done that okay, people who have been on ski boat type of boats, yes, whether they've wakeboarded or not right, oh, I'm top top 10%.
Speaker 1Right. I think that's you're right. I agree with you.
Speaker 2Yeah. So I think I think the ability to get up and cut back and forth and be pretty comfortable and do a little bit of a jump Yep. I think that's more than 90% of people can do. That's One because they've never done it or it's awkward. Yeah, and the people?
Speaker 1who can do like the real cool tricks, like that's top one percent stuff. That's right. That's exactly what I'm thinking I was. That's exactly my point. I think there must be a lot more things in life at that where, if you can just kind of do it pretty well not even pretty well, but do it averagely well you are better than most people at that thing because, well, this has been my economic or this, this has been my academic plan my whole life it's just I was never shooting to be the best.
Speaker 2I was shooting to be better than most, and it has worked well it's kind of it's it's kind of like that thing where, if there is a bear, you don't have to run faster than the bear, you just have to run faster than the other guy who's running from the bear faster than me?
Speaker 1no, that's, and I I wonder if this is undervalued in the world, like I wonder if we undervalue the fact that, because the fact that this is true, I think this is a true statement and we, though, we look at the top one percent and we're like well, I'm never gonna do it.
Speaker 1And two backflips and that you know I guess I'm not good, but most people are like, oh, you can get up on a weight board and like confidently cut and uh, like do jumps and like do a 180, and you know what I mean. Like wow, like most people in the boat when you and I wait for, they're like that that's pretty good. I think partly for me. They're like I expected that I'd not expect that of you, chubby man, to be able to do.
Speaker 2That's pretty good for a man of your build and stature. I was not expecting that yeah, I don't think I'd go so far, as people in the boat are like, oh, he's pretty good. I think they're more like no, I think so I thought he would be better, having been a guy who's been around boats his whole life.
Speaker 1This is sort of disappointing. I see that I think you're doing the thing that we do Am.
Speaker 2I doing that, am I falling into the?
Speaker 1trap. I think you are. I think you're falling into the trap. I think most people are like wow, well done. Whereas we're like, oh, we're not that dude, well no, but I think they've also seen the pros, the top 10%.
Speaker 2So then when they see it live, they're like this guy sucks, but it's like actually no, they haven't.
Speaker 1When have they seen the pros? Well, I mean.
Speaker 2I'm talking about anything at this point. Like, hey, I'm going to play you a song around the campfire, while you're terrible at the guitar well compared to like john mayer sure, sure, right.
Speaker 1But you see, I don't think people say that, I think people go oh, he can play songs around the guitar. That's where most people live, where they're like I wish I could grab a guitar and play a song around the guitar with a chord chart, whereas we go oh, I'm not, john, may. I can't shred, I can't just lead.
Speaker 2So okay, so I think I'm hearing what you're saying. Is that one of the things that we have to tap into more is other people's poor reflections of themselves too, right, right.
Speaker 1Okay.
Speaker 2We need to really capitalize on how badly people feel about themselves, because if we do that, then what they're really looking at is they're like, well, he might not be the best, but I could never even do that, gee how sad for me. Ah right, I can't play a single. I don't even know what Gee. How sad for me. Ah right, I can't play a single. I don't even know what a chord is.
Speaker 1Yes, yes, exactly. Wish I could be like that, Wish I could just bust out the guitar and play. We know it's four chord songs, but they're like that's pretty. I guess I should. Maybe the and this is all like listener this could be a more refined thought in a year. So I think we're just in baby steps. So don't if you're hearing this, you have ideas to add be like oh well, what about this? I totally agree with you.
Speaker 2So well, I don't buy. Now Most people have understood, at least for me, my my in the scale of thoughts being refined. I'm more like the crude oil that is just pumped out of the earth after being there for millions of years. I love it, yeah.
Speaker 1But I think the thing that we're all part of this truth is everybody spends time wishing they were up Right, okay, and I think that that's we need to recognize that and I think take some satisfaction in like where you are Right. Like, hey, yeah.
Speaker 2Beautiful.
Speaker 1I'm never going to crush the. In fact, I have fully gotten there with my snowboarding ability. Like most mountains, I'm going to get down without falling. May not go as fast as some, but I'm going to get down without falling. May not go as fast as some, may not be, but I'm gonna. I'm gonna be able to shred that. Mar now jumps, jumps, though. Yeah, I've realized right that hitting big jumps.
Speaker 1That's not in my life plan some birds are flightless well, also the amount of pain that I need to experience to get good at hitting the large jumps and now, at my age, it's not worth it.
Speaker 2It's just not worth it. That ship has sailed long ago.
Speaker 1That ship has sailed and so I'm very satisfied with where I am. And most people when they sail with me, they're like oh, that was pretty good, because again I'm cruising with you, we're having fun, we're keeping up, we're doing the mountain, I'm having a great time, I would say, with the exception being the park, there is no NAR, that I cannot shred on a mountain. Exactly that's what I mean, and we had a great time and I hope we snowboard again this winter.
Speaker 1Because, it's really fun. Yeah, it's really fun to do that, like, just do that right and be like, oh, that was great, like that was really fun yeah, I like this, I like this I'm feeling so good about myself.
Speaker 2You know what else I'm good at I wonder.
Speaker 1This is why I live in my world, though of like I people are always like how do you walk around this thing? Because this is I think, this is where I think, like I wasn't yeah that's true that's a good place to be.
Speaker 2Let this be the inspiration of today's episode. Hey, you're probably better than a lot of other people.
Speaker 1This is a good way to put it.
Speaker 2Yeah, yeah, I like that.
Speaker 1Yeah, you might suck, but there's a lot of people who suck way more than you, or you might be average and you might never get to doing the air railing and enjoy that, but that's okay, yeah.
Speaker 2That top 10, 15, 20% is just flat unattainable. So, exactly, don't set the bar too high. Is that what we're saying? We're?
Speaker 1I don't think we're saying that. I think there's more. No, because I do think. You see, I think that where this thought started was with the like those guys are the one percent yeah, they're like, or even the point one percent right, that's what we're holding ourselves right it's like well, I should hold myself in basketball.
Speaker 2To toby bryant is like is there the other side of this? And I'm thinking all of the sudden of the australian break dancer in the olympics, where there was too many people around her being like you're? Killing it you're killing it ray gun.
Speaker 1She's like, yeah, I'm going to the olympics and that's like I haven't been able to get the fullness of that story is that? Did she actually think she was killing it or did she? I've heard two sides of one that she just thought this was a great way to go to the olympics and be in the olympics and she knew she wasn't great. But you know what she's like. I'm in in the Olympics, which I have a lot of respect for that.
Speaker 2So so I don't know. It could be. I don't know either, but that reminded me I watched a movie recently on an airplane about this kid who want, who became a Olympic ski jumper. Okay, I cannot think of the name of it, but it was such a great movie because this kid from a young age was just so determined to make it to the Olympics and he was like what sport, what sport?
Speaker 2And he tried this sport, Nope couldn't do that Tried, that sport couldn't do that Tried that sport couldn't do that. Finally, and he grew up in like England and he finally somehow found downhill skiing and got pretty good but couldn't make it and then found some loophole that the British team didn't have an Olympic ski jumper and all you needed to qualify was to do and it was so dang funny Hugh Jackman's in it.
Speaker 2Great movie, great movie and true story he really did it, so I'll have to come up with the name. Is that her?
Speaker 1story. I really don't know. I don't know, I don't know. It's a great idea if it is Like her story. I, I really don't know, but I don't know that, I don't know. It's a great idea if it is like you know what? I want to be olympics. I want to go and walk the parade. I want to get the outfit.
Speaker 2It's like that would be incredible if that's what is your life like if that was her thing? Though she, her, her pr team didn't do a good job of conveying that, because most people were pretty much like oh yeah, pretty harsh pretty harsh.
Exploring San Antonio's History and Charm
Speaker 1Well, it was pretty it was, I saw. It's so funny because I saw one of the nfl players did a touchdown celebration, did some of her moves, oh, sweet they put it next to each other, so like to lay down it was pretty good, I was like that's a yes, okay, so orange texas all right, so orange texas, which is funny because I live in orange california, now California now.
Speaker 2Orange Texas is not much to write about. It's just between New Orleans and San Antonio. I think it's the first town onage of pictures of Orange Texas, and one of the pictures is welcome to Texas. I think it is the first stop coming from east to west in Texas.
Speaker 1So we got into Orange, then we go down to San Antonio. San Antonio is only well, actually, I was going to say only, but there's two things. It's well known for One da-da-da-da-da listener the Alamo, the.
Speaker 2Alamo Number two da the.
Speaker 1Alamo, the Riverwalk, the Riverwalk, and that's probably it. Maybe the San Antonio Spurs, if you really like basketball. Sure, sure, yeah. So we did both of those things. Of course we did. You have to because you're at the San Antonio.
Speaker 2So, scott, tell me your impression of the Alamo.
Speaker 1I the Alamo I. So I I had been there before, which, oh yeah, is a little bit gonna shade my impression. I think I've been there obviously three times. I think I went there with Emily once too. But the Alamo is is. I think it's less impressive than you think of it as it's got a little bit of that Plymouth Rock vibe that we spoke about A little bit, Not as much, though Not as much. No, no, no, no no.
Speaker 2It is there. The story of the Alamo is what's big.
Speaker 1And there may be one of those things where the amount of pride that San Antonians have in the I would maybe say Texans in general have in the Alamo, to what the Alamo actually is, is a little. There's a gap there. Because you know, texas in general thinks I talked about our just last conversation anything Texas to them is better than anything else in the world, right? So like, even though it's the Alamo, you're like okay, it's a mission, like building and davy crock was here and they, you know, for they fought and they they lost, which is right, like they didn't win that battle, oh yeah no, that's the whole story.
Speaker 1They all died all of them and then you say remember the alamo and you're like this is so. This place is a great defeat, you know you held on for a long time you held on.
Speaker 2It was a great defeat, but it was the american defiance that, yeah, that makes it such a legend. Right is, they were surrounded but they dug in and they defended themselves and all the long as they could all that was that the indians that were fighting against them basically no, the Mexicans. The Mexicans Just starved them out.
Speaker 1Yeah, they were coming up, so that was a fort so that they could keep Texas, and I think it's there that we learned that Texas is the one flag that can fly at the same height as the US flag, because they were their own country for like a year, maybe, maybe it's a month, there's some amount of time that they're their own country for because America didn't want them as a state, because it would offset the number of slave states and free states, and so America didn't let them into the Union, and so because that time the Texas flag and the American flag can fly at the same height, I'm pretty sure that that's like 90%, true? Are you sure that that's like?
Speaker 290%, true? Well, I don't have any idea because I wasn't listening to you. I was trying to look up the so for you, the listener. I hope that was a very engaging walkthrough. Yes, it was Thank you, you tend to be right about these things, so that's why I didn't feel the need to Correct me. I appreciate that, correct you. Yeah, there's far too much't feel the need to Correct me. I appreciate that, correct you. Yeah, there's far too much to read here. To try to summarize this, look it up, listener.
Speaker 2Look it up. What's the Okay? Here's the thing I think it is a place worth visiting because one just the historical significance and how famous it is. It's cool to be in a place that has that kind of story behind it. Um so, when in san antonio visit the alamo, it is not large and it's kind of in a square with tall buildings around it, which doesn't help either because it just sort of makes it feel a little bit smaller.
Speaker 1Yes, yeah, it's in the middle of like a downtown area. Yeah, so it doesn't quite have that.
Speaker 2Yeah, but it's definitely cool to go see it because it's yeah, it's a mission and us in California we visit missions all the time. It's a fourth grade project, so like that's what we do. So maybe in texas those are, yeah, go mud buildings, um, and that's all the history we have here in california, so like it's all we've got is these exactly.
Speaker 1It has a very southwest vibe, for sure. I mean, the building has a very southwest vibe yeah, I remember like very thick walls. Yeah, it's cool, it's still standing right, like one of those things oh yeah oh, this is cool that. And then the Riverwalk is very neat because you can just walk along and it's relaxing Anytime you're walking along water it's a pretty good day.
Speaker 2But it's unlike anything else. I mean, it's sort of it's almost as if they built a place where you could go and shop and eat inside of it's a.
Speaker 1Small World. I knew you were going to use a Disneyland reference, because it has a very Disney feel to it, doesn't it?
Speaker 2Yeah, it's like you're inside but you're outside and there's all these trees that overhang it and lights. It's awesome.
Speaker 1It's awesome. It's funny because the number of times that I I like you're at the the sequoias, the great sequoia forest, or you're going to the grand canyon, these huge rocks, you're like oh it's like disneyland cars ride. You're like oh, no, no, no, no cars is like this, oh, this is the real and I feel like, yeah, especially as people from southern california where disney is, disney is such a permanent feature in our lives, oh, it is terrible yeah.
Speaker 1Oh yeah, oh, this is like a California adventure. No, no, no, they saw this first. God made this first.
Speaker 2You're in the swamps of Louisiana. Well, they made these to look just like the Pirates of the Caribbean ride. Yeah, we probably should have mentioned that when we went to New Orleans. This looks just like New Orleans Square at Disneyland.
Speaker 1Wow, wow, how did they do it. Well done New Orleans. Yeah, disney really nails it. Yeah, we flip it, flip it. Yeah, oh, this is the replica, I see, oh right, it's better than the original, though it's better because there's a bathroom right there and churros for sale right over there, souvenirs plenty, yeah.
Speaker 2So san antonio, um, I think san antonio is a much, a much bigger city than I tend to think of it. Right like it is, it's a major metropolitan area, it's right smack dab. Well, it's kind of south central.
Speaker 1Texas. But, it's also in the middle of, if I remember correctly, the Austin-Dallas driving zone, so you're kind of like three hours from each, so you have, and then not far outside that you have some really small towns. But yeah, it's in that kind of area and it's about San Antonio-Dallas, texas turns into the same until you hit los angeles yeah, because when we, when we got into orange texas, just in that, you're still getting kind of that louisiana swamp kind of thing, and as you go, san antonio, it's very much just flat desert yep.
Speaker 1and then all of a sudden you're like now we just stay on a 10 until the ocean. Yeah, Because it's all the same.
Speaker 2Yeah, oh no. So San Antonio is actually the Southern most city in that line. So it goes San Antonio, Austin, Dallas.
Speaker 1Dallas straight up, yeah, and then.
Speaker 2Houston is directly to the East.
Speaker 1And Houston's closer to the east.
Speaker 2And.
Speaker 1Houston's closer to the ocean? Yes, it is. So we came.
Speaker 2Yeah, we went pretty close, so we would have driven through Houston.
Speaker 1I didn't realize that it's all kind of that line, and then that line is kind of, hopefully, the most livable part of Texas, and then there's West Texas where there's not a lot of water and there's a lot of water and yeah there's a lot of deserts that you need to survive.
Speaker 2I'm looking at the map here and, yes, that line of San Antonio, austin, dallas, it's colored green. This isn't like an aerial image, it's just like a map. And then as soon as you get out of San Antonio, those cities and you start to head further west, it they just change the color to brown, which is so accurate, exactly, and I think that's kind of what I think of it, as it's like that's where people are like we can live here.
Speaker 1Stop, nope, nope, no more. You can't go any farther than this. Or else it's very, very difficult to live, yeah, and so, yeah, because there's water, because obviously there's trees, there's water Because obviously there's trees, so there's rivers, there's the Antonio River, there's little things, and then all of a sudden, there's none of that and it's cacti and dirt, lots of dirt, which is where we're heading. But did you know, and you might not know this, but El Paso, where we're headed, is one of the best kept secrets in America.
Speaker 2So that one guy said but don't tell anybody.
Speaker 1Okay, don't tell anybody because I don't want it to grow at all, because if people start moving in then it won't be the best temple to see it'll totally ruin what they've got going on there in beautiful El Paso.
Speaker 2Tune in next time where we talk about how amazing El Paso Texas is, which means doesn't it just mean like eh, pass?
Speaker 1I think so, and I was wondering if you were talking about the salsa, because that is amazing, but the city itself. Yeah, see you next week next time bye.