Porch Banter and Dr. Hook Spotlight

Gas jumps. War headlines get louder. Work is a mess because the crew is short. And somehow, on a quiet porch, we still find time to laugh about a bird trying to join the show. That is the vibe today: real life first, big news second, and a music rabbit hole that makes the heavy stuff easier to carry.

We talk through rising tension around Iran and what it means when leaders start throwing around threats to hit infrastructure. Then we follow the money trail into oil markets and why gas prices feel like they are controlled by a “global market” no one asked for. Along the way we hit a few U.S. headlines, including military leadership shakeups and court rulings, and we share the blunt, unfiltered questions a lot of people ask when they are trying to make sense of it all.

Then we shift gears into what we love: music. Tom spotlights Dr. Hook, from the early Dr. Hook and the Medicine Show days to the radio hits you already know, and the deep cuts you probably have not heard in years. We talk songwriting, genre swings, and why bands from the 1970s could be heartfelt one minute and completely unhinged the next. We also bring the laughs with weird Dr. Hook trivia, then close out with strange Easter foods and Easter traditions from around the world, including Finland’s “Easter witches” and egg races down hills.

If you like conversational podcasts, classic rock stories, current events with zero pretense, and a lot of honest side commentary, hit play. Subscribe, share the episode with a friend, and leave us a review so we know what to tackle next.

Transcript

Porch Catch-Up And Weather Talk

SPEAKER_00 0:15

And we're back again, Tom, on the porch.

SPEAKER_01 0:18

Hey, Mike, and what a beautiful day it is on the porch.

SPEAKER_00 0:22

Gorgeous day. Warm, but nice breeze.

SPEAKER_01 0:24

Yeah. Usually we're bitching about the wind up here. No, not today. Not today. It's like a peaceful. It's like a a blessing. It is. It's been dry though. Yeah, we need a little rain.

SPEAKER_00 0:38

I heard you got some rain up your way, a little heavy downpour, maybe.

SPEAKER_01 0:41

Right there. Well, we got early one morning and late in the evening. So we got a couple showers.

SPEAKER_00 0:48

See here we just got a couple Josh had a downpoured up at his place.

SPEAKER_01 0:51

Well, it might have at his place because it looked bad over that way. Seven miles east.

SPEAKER_00 0:56

Ours was like a shower with kind of the sun still shining.

SPEAKER_01 1:00

Right?

SPEAKER_00 1:01

It was like maybe fifteen, twenty minutes, and it was gone. Done. We need more than that. Yeah, well, we did get a it's like you can't win. We get either a shitload of rain or no rain at all.

SPEAKER_01 1:12

We got good rain in the morning and then didn't do anything all day. And then another morning. Not today.

SPEAKER_00 1:24

I don't think it rained in the morning here at all.

SPEAKER_01 1:26

No, I'm coming to my house.

SPEAKER_00 1:28

Yeah, what what morning?

SPEAKER_01 1:31

What what day is this? Friday?

SPEAKER_00 1:34

Oh, good Friday, as a matter of fact. Good Friday. Good Friday. Acknowledge that, yes.

SPEAKER_01 1:39

But yeah, we went to I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 1:44

No, I'm just wondering, because what morning? I'm thinking we never got rain any morning.

SPEAKER_01 1:48

Well, we I had rain. We had rain Tuesday morning. Oh shit. And Wednesday night.

SPEAKER_00 1:57

See I think we had rain Wednesday. When I came home from work. That's what I'm talking about. The little shower we had.

SPEAKER_01 2:06

Yeah.

Work Injury And The Jobsite Mess

SPEAKER_00 2:06

That was it. Yeah, anyways.

SPEAKER_01 2:11

Yeah, it's just we need rain.

SPEAKER_00 2:12

Yeah, we absolutely. Now, Tom hasn't been at work. He's out on an injury, so he says, no. Anyways. Ow. It's a shit show, Tom. Yeah. And the problem is, yeah, you'd be there. Would it help a little? Yes, of course. But you know how it is.

SPEAKER_01 2:30

Still be a shit show.

SPEAKER_00 2:31

Well, they wanted so much out.

SPEAKER_01 2:33

Yeah. See, that's ridiculous to set up in an office and expect people to shoot out all these unrealistic numbers when there's nowhere to move them.

SPEAKER_00 2:44

And we're two men down. You being out. We have another material hand that we don't have.

SPEAKER_01 2:50

Yep. It's just everybody's trying to do everybody else's job while their job goes backwards. It's just, it's it's oh, what was those words? Shit show.

SPEAKER_00 3:01

A shit show. Yeah. Absolute hot mess. I got a stack of papers for Casey's Table. Damn. But hey, that's alright. Worry about that. Monday, we got a three-day weekend. Job security. Getting paid today. Uh first paid podcast. First, first paid podcast. Thank you, where we were.

SPEAKER_01 3:23

Yes. Thank you for paying us for doing this.

SPEAKER_00 3:27

Anyways, so let's get into the gloom and doom first. Before we get into our music segment.

SPEAKER_01 3:34

Well, my wife said that she needed to be a child. No, no, no, not that gloom and doom. No, no.

SPEAKER_00 3:40

We're not going there.

SPEAKER_01 3:41

Okay.

Iran Conflict And Oil Price Jumps

SPEAKER_00 3:41

Let's not really depress what few listeners we have. Let's start with the, I guess we'll start with the old uh war in Iran. Yep. Conflict intensifies in the ongoing U.S. Israel military campaign against Iran. President Donald Trump threatened to strike Iranian infrastructure, including bridges and power plants, raising fears of broader destruction and civilian harm. I'm going to make a little comment here. I voted for Trump. I'm I'm happy with him in most things. I don't know if we got enough heads on this.

SPEAKER_01 4:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 4:11

How many people have presidents have already tried to do this? And I hate to say it, I've said it before. I don't want boots on the ground, but I think that's the only way you're going to get rid of these little cockroaches.

SPEAKER_01 4:21

He says he says that there's more going in May.

SPEAKER_00 4:24

Yeah. Well, we'll see what happens. I also think this gas price stuff is bullshit, but anyways.

SPEAKER_01 4:30

Exactly. It always is.

SPEAKER_00 4:31

And speaking of oil markets react violently. U.S. crude prices jumped over 11%. Brent rose nearly 8% as markets prices sustain disruptions. That's another thing. Why gas prices set by a global market? Right. Like why? Why we have to be in the global market? I don't know. I don't understand that economics of that part or what it is, but I'm just curious.

SPEAKER_01 4:53

Yeah, stupid.

SPEAKER_00 4:54

I mean, if we get all this oil here, let us be self-sufficient.

SPEAKER_01 4:59

Exactly.

SPEAKER_00 5:00

Let's take care of us first. And I understand selling oil to other places. I get it, but that I don't know. Maybe that's why trading. That's probably why the global market. Alright, let's move on. Let's see. Oh, yes. There's another big one I heard. Army leadership shakeup. The U.S. Army Chief of Staff was fired in a major Pentagon. Personal change ordered by Pentagon leadership. Huh. Interesting. I heard he sat in on one thing with the Supreme Court ruling. I think it was on uh birthright citizenship. Birthright citizenship. Which I think is a bunch of bullshit. Yep. You can't just come here, have a kid, now that kid's American, but you move back to your country. 30 years later he can come back and run for president. No bullshit with that. Nope. Nope. Nope, nope. Anyways, that's another topic for another time. Let's see. Border enforcement ruling. A federal judge ruled that U.S. border officials violated a previous court order on warrantless arrest. There is no such thing when it's federal, buddy. So nothing. If it's immigration laws, that's a whole different ballgame. Right. Oh, was a federal judge ruled, though? Okay. Okay, good. Back up on that. So I don't know what the ruling was, what he ruled against, but whatever. Labor market data. Weekly jobless claims fell suggesting continued strength in the U.S. labor market, even amid geopolitical driven. Well, that's a good thing. Americans increasingly pessimistic about the ongoing Iran conflict, which I understand. See, that was my thing, too. Right. Boots on the ground. But I think at this, like I said, at this point, you kind of have to go with that. You gotta eradicate it up. Let's see, global markets, uh, oil prices spikes, but the stock market went up. Yeah. You know what else bothers me? This guy, this bird, trying to get in on our podcast. Yeah, he's our first guest we've ever had. And he's starting to get on my nerves.

SPEAKER_01 7:11

Yeah, that's why we don't have guests.

Why Government Buys A $400 Hammer

SPEAKER_00 7:13

All right. So talking about all this, let's move on to something that we were both talking about. We're on news, wor U.S. news. Right. The government overspending on buying stuff. You had a story when you were in school that they told you.

SPEAKER_01 7:27

Yeah, we were supposed to do some research on government and see. Government spending? Yeah, what the spending was in the office of the president. Each one of us took a you know, we found that a stapler, they paid fifty-six thousand dollars.

SPEAKER_00 7:47

Was it fifty-six thousand or fifty six hundred dollars? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 7:51

That's a long time to think about it. Right, right, right. But I remember as a kid, it was like a just ridiculous.

SPEAKER_00 7:58

And in school, I remember the same kind of thing being taught, and about it was a hammer, though. Right toilet she came up to, but the hammer sticks in my mind. You know, a hammer. What back then? We're talking the 70s. Okay, a real good hammer, maybe back then 10 bucks. Yeah, maybe a good 12 bucks, 15. Let's go 15 even.

SPEAKER_01 8:16

Because you can buy a cheap one right now for eight bucks.

SPEAKER_00 8:18

No, they spent$400 on a hammer. Well, of course they did. And and$1,000 on a wrench.

SPEAKER_01 8:25

I know why. Why? You never know when someone's gonna come in your bedroom with a damn hammer and beat you up, so you gotta have the better hammer. Well, let me let me explain why.

SPEAKER_00 8:36

Well, let the their explanation. Military tools appeared massively overpriced. Yeah. In reality, often included research, testing, documentation, and logistics. Isn't that what every tool? If I'm using a wrench, shouldn't it have been checked to make sure specs are right? It's test 916th wrench.

SPEAKER_01 8:53

It's got a fit in the no wonder everybody's missing the 10 millimeter.

SPEAKER_00 8:59

It covered long-term maintenance contracts, but the classroom takeaways, why didn't they just go to Sears? Absolutely. Or the$300 coffee maker. Specialized equipment for ships or submarines. Okay. Again,$300. What about the toilet seat? Oh boy.$600 toilet seat. Of course. Why? It got lost. They were custom built for military aircraft. Is everybody's ass different on an aircraft? Yeah. That had to meet fire pressure and safety specs. Shouldn't my toilet seat meet that same quality? I don't want to be on the toilet and the things burn. Yeah. And there I go. Anyway. That's it. Just bitching about the stupid overprice and how they try to like, I guess, try to talk their way out of. Well, this is why. This is because this we had to do this. I think you should have done that on everything.

SPEAKER_01 9:47

Yeah, I'd hear it.

SPEAKER_00 9:48

But again, government spending. So let's move on to the better part of our podcast, huh? Yeah. Exactly. He grabbed his toy.

SPEAKER_01 10:02

Yep. There he goes. He's gone.

Dr. Hook Spotlight And Starter Songs

SPEAKER_00 10:04

But uh our dog chants. Anyways, Tom's Spotlight Band. Now, this isn't a new band, but you know, a lot of people probably haven't heard of them. Maybe they did. Dr. Hook.

SPEAKER_01 10:16

Yeah, I love Dr. Hook.

SPEAKER_00 10:17

Dr. Hook. Tom's one of his favorites. Yep. First met Tom that sang a lot of songs. Who the hell is that?

SPEAKER_01 10:24

Man, there's so many different genres that they sing. There's so much. It's just I think it was said best when what was it that they said?

SPEAKER_00 10:38

Uh well, let me give a little breakdown first before you get into it. A quick breakdown of the band. For people who don't know Doctor Hook. Uh, you've heard of their songs, I'm sure. Dr. Hook was formed in 1968 in Union City, New Jersey. Right. Who started the band. The group was co-founded by Ray Sawyer, lead vocalist, and that's the guy at the iPad. Right. And George Cumming was lead guitarist. They were later joined by songwriter Shell Siverstein, whose songs helped launch the band nationally. Original core members, the lineup shifted quickly, but the early core members most associated with the band's formation were Ray Sawyer Vocals, Dennis LaCorrier, Vocals Rhythm Guitar, George Cummings Lead Guitar, Bill Francis, keyboards, and John Walter's drums. From there, Dr. Hook became known for frequent lineup changes, especially after the early 70s breakout.

SPEAKER_01 11:26

Yeah. Yeah, wouldn't they go?

SPEAKER_00 11:28

Because they were Doctor Hook in the Medicine Show when it started.

SPEAKER_01 11:32

Right.

SPEAKER_00 11:32

And uh what they got more a little more poppy, country in 75.

SPEAKER_01 11:38

Yeah, and then switched more to slow mellow love songs.

SPEAKER_00 11:43

A lot of good songs, though.

SPEAKER_01 11:45

Oh, wonderful songs.

SPEAKER_00 11:46

They were really a lot of good songs.

SPEAKER_01 11:49

And they tell stories.

SPEAKER_00 11:50

See, now a lot of them I didn't know. Cover the Rolling Stone, I'm sure everybody's heard of that. At the Abbey, you're living in a cave somewhere. Exactly. Uh Sharing a Night Together was another big one. Sexy Eyes. Right. See, these are songs that I know, but obviously you're deeper into the catalog. I know that one too, yeah. That was a Sam Cook song.

SPEAKER_01 12:09

Right. Yep. Right. And then they had Um Storms Never Last.

SPEAKER_00 12:15

Okay. See, a lot of these I never that's what I'm saying. This is Tom's thing here. I just did a little research myself. I like I said, I know who Doctor Hook is, know the songs. Not like Tom, though.

SPEAKER_01 12:27

Right. But here's everybody that had that knows Dr. Hook has heard those songs.

SPEAKER_00 12:32

Let's go to this first. How did you start getting into Dr. Hook listening?

SPEAKER_01 12:35

Oh well. That's an interesting thing. I'd spend I'd spend summers with my sister out on a farm. And uh we would have not I would have nothing to do. She was in town working, and her husband was on the Tom's got a lot of form working. So yeah, and I would have nothing to do but just sit around and listen to music. And she had a job. I mean, just full cupboard of Dr. Hook. Anything you wanted to hear. She was Dr. Hook fan, and and I tend to like them and they're harmonizing and everything. But what caught me at that age, you gotta figure I was 12, 13 years old. So what caught me was the songs that nobody really hears. Like um the get your rocks off. Okay. Uh freaking at the freakers ball.

SPEAKER_00 13:36

I think that's mostly everybody, Tom, that has a band they like. Right. They usually like the deeper cuts off an album more than the I mean this they like the songs that are out there. Exactly. But they always and see a lot of people don't get to hear those other songs because radio's only playing what they want to play.

SPEAKER_01 13:52

Exactly. That's that's kind of why we're doing this, is so people would be aware of what's out there and they can look up and see the different songs that they do have. Like one of the rarest songs of Dr. Hook I remember is in 1975 was Jungle to the Zoo. Okay. Where they're talking about a tiger.

SPEAKER_00 14:12

A tiger.

SPEAKER_01 14:13

Yeah, where they he's he's trying to teach the younger tigers to watch out because they're gonna catch you. That's what the song's about. Feed you full of goodies, and you tell you're too fat to move, then it's one step from the jungle to the zoo.

SPEAKER_00 14:31

Anyone is happy.

SPEAKER_01 14:33

Huh? I don't care.

SPEAKER_00 14:34

Okay, anyway, back trying to kill a fly. Yeah. I don't know why we're killing a fly. I don't either. Perhaps it'll die. I didn't mean to distract you there, Tom.

SPEAKER_01 14:43

That's cool, but anyway. But yeah, Dr. Hook's got a lot of good songs that everybody knows, but there's another side of Doctor Hook everybody don't know. And we heard we heard well, I I heard a song today I'd never heard before, and I wish I'd never heard that was that was terrible.

SPEAKER_00 15:01

Painful. That was very terrible.

SPEAKER_01 15:03

And then I'm not sure what part would you call that a song. Well, I call that someone experimenting with drugs and alcohol and doing something in a basement. Probably the most honest thing I can give that one. It's a good analogy, I guess. But if you search Dr. Hook, you'll find what I'm saying. But anyway, there's a lot of stuff that is.

SPEAKER_00 15:24

I mean, you you know, had me listen to some funky stuff, I said, damn.

SPEAKER_01 15:28

And then if you just like that LSD was big back then. Yeah, it was, and they were using it hard. But anyway, if you like the mellow stuff and everything, they've got that too, and you know, they tell stories like uh Cookie and Lila, that that's a great song, and you know, not to be mistaken, with uh there's another one that goes a completely opposite direction, but it's Dr.

SPEAKER_00 15:55

Hook, it doesn't surprise me.

SPEAKER_01 15:57

So but they have all kinds of stuff that you just is out there that is for everybody.

SPEAKER_00 16:03

So yeah, I mean, I obviously people have heard of him, but if you haven't, give Dr. Hook a listen. Yeah, I think you'll find some songs and you'll be surprised at like, oh shit, I know that song.

SPEAKER_01 16:12

Yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_00 16:13

And my image of Dr. Hook when I was younger is like, look at these weirdo hippie looking dudes, and then you hear these songs that I'm like, I wouldn't expect them to sing those at all. And and like sexy eyes and all that.

SPEAKER_01 16:26

And one day I show I let him hear uh uh what was it? Uh Carry Me Carry Carry Me Carry. My God. And he's like, sounds like they're on a sounds like they're drunk on a yacht or something. They were on a boat. They were on a boat, and it was perfect. That's exactly what they were. But they're just Dr. Hook and the medicine show. Well, not the medicine show anymore, but you know, they took all kinds of pills that gave them all kinds of thrills.

SPEAKER_00 16:52

There you go.

SPEAKER_01 16:53

But you know, just anyway, listen to them.

SPEAKER_00 16:55

Yeah, give them a shot. Give them a listen. And people that have listened, oh, then you know what we're talking about. Exactly. Uh, I think now's a good time to let the little rascals in there, little dudes.

SPEAKER_01 17:06

Little dudes.

SPEAKER_00 17:07

Uh, we'll be back right after the little dudes, folks.

SPEAKER_02 17:24

How are you right in, buddy? Well, that was like this. I was like what does she want besides picking me up? She's you're not the only she's even a mummy. When I leave here, I'm with her. And she doesn't go anywhere. What the way she's at? Yeah, we have camera security camera. Yeah. Yeah. I see this. She's very nice now. She's nowhing but goodness coming from the Louise. Maybe because she's with a dumbass. It doesn't matter when he's gonna let him run. You know what? I'm going back on to the Uber drive. I'm going to see my little mama being. Yeah, you go back and watch the dog races. I see the Uber driver. Okay. That's fine. Until next time for later.

SPEAKER_00 29:07

Same fucking little dudes. Whatever. Squeak is is just I don't know what to say about squeak.

SPEAKER_01 29:14

Why do we tolerate?

SPEAKER_00 29:15

I don't. They're fun. I mean, look at them. Yeah, I know. Sad sack. Anyways, uh, before we jump into or we close, I want to talk about some strange things with Dr. Hook. Right? Since that was your band. We looked up some any, you know, little stuff that happened with the band of strange shit. Y I. Yeah. Hold on for a minute.

SPEAKER_01 29:38

I'm with you. This portion of the show is brought to you in part by the MT Alternative Podcast.

SPEAKER_00 29:47

All right, starting off with uh the band name and the confusion of the band name, which we kind of went over. The full original name was Dr. Hook and the Medicine Show, but they ought to get short to Dr. Hook. Fans sometimes thought they were some kind of medical peak band. Imagine a 70s mom buying a record, think it was a kid's educational album. Why does my son want this?

SPEAKER_01 30:10

Why did you throw my PE project away?

SPEAKER_00 30:14

Dennis LaCoria's voice. Dennis LaCorria sang the majority of the hits, but he wasn't officially the lead singer at first. Some fans didn't realize the band had multiple vocals. I didn't. I just assumed all the voices came from the guy who drank too much whiskey.

SPEAKER_01 30:28

That's all of them. Right.

SPEAKER_00 30:31

Alright, I didn't know this. Sylvia's mother controversy. Their first big hit was heartbreakingly sad, but the song reportedly upset real people named Sylvia and their mothers. Imagine getting a call from your mom being yelled at because of a pop song. Awkward.

SPEAKER_01 30:45

Should have named it Karen.

SPEAKER_00 30:47

Karen. Karen. Alright, cannibalistic album covers. What? One of their album covers, Belly Up, had the band in exaggerated cartoonish poses looking almost like a carnival sideshow. In some circles, it was considered a little disturbing. Definitely made them memorable. Well, that's like every band nowadays with weird shit.

SPEAKER_01 31:09

There's a lot of weird shit.

SPEAKER_00 31:10

Here we go. This sounds like more the stuff I'm interested in. Scandal, Alcohol and Fights, the 1970s touring style lifestyle caught up to them. There were stories of fights backstage and too much partying. Oh yeah. No, not Doctor Hook. Really? Not shocking for the era, but apparently they were so chaotic that Roadie sometimes quit mid-tour rather than deal with it. Holy shit. Yeah. That's some messed up stuff. Roadie's like, I'm out of here. This is bullshit. Gertie. Yeah, we get Roadie's quit. That's bad.

SPEAKER_01 31:36

Roland the Roadie and Gertrude the Groupy. Good luck finding someone else. That's another song. That's another song. You guys gotta look that one up. That's a good one.

SPEAKER_00 31:45

Alright. Odd song topics. Dr. Hook wasn't shy about strange or risque subject matter. They had songs about, well, cover of the Rolling Stone was literally about wanting to appear on Rolling Stone magazine. Right. It was a meta hit. The band got so famous for a song about fame itself that it became their own weird scandal. Fiction versus reality. Oh boy. Even though they had songs with storytelling elements, drinking, cheating, heartbreak, the band often said the stories weren't auto-biographical. Sorry. Fans weren't sure whether to believe them or just keep singing along while imagining the drama. So that's uh the weird stuff for Doctor Hulk.

SPEAKER_01 32:27

Really fighting.

SPEAKER_00 32:29

I really like to hear those stories.

SPEAKER_01 32:30

Yeah. I'd like to be a fly on the wall.

SPEAKER_00 32:33

I'll be honest. Any 70s band at the time, really.

SPEAKER_01 32:36

Where'd the eye patch come from, smart ass? Is it fake? Is it real? Yeah, is it uh with another poke in the eye? No, I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 32:46

Yeah. I didn't know if it was part of the his look or whatever.

SPEAKER_01 32:50

Yeah, exactly. But anyways. And I like them. Look them up. They're great.

Strange Easter Foods And Traditions

SPEAKER_00 32:56

And uh let's see, in the MT alternative podcast usual ways. We have some weird traditions for Easter.

SPEAKER_01 33:05

Yeah. Some Easter to get in the Easter stuff.

SPEAKER_00 33:10

Since we're on that weekend.

SPEAKER_01 33:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 33:12

So let's uh dig in, let's see. Strange Easter foods, Tom.

SPEAKER_01 33:17

Strange Easter foods. I'll tell you what that is right now.

SPEAKER_00 33:21

What is it?

SPEAKER_01 33:21

Ham with pineapples all over it.

SPEAKER_00 33:25

A lot of people like that.

SPEAKER_01 33:27

A lot of people are idiots.

SPEAKER_00 33:28

I don't mind the pineapple cooked on the ham. I don't want pineapple pizza though at ham. No, no, no. That's where I draw the line. I can eat ham regular. I can eat ham cooked with pineapple. But don't put fresh pineapple on the ham. No. It's gonna be cooked.

SPEAKER_01 33:44

Yeah, well.

SPEAKER_00 33:45

I know it sounds weird, but pizza, no. Ham, yes.

SPEAKER_01 33:49

Unfortunately, you should have just dropped about six or eight points a year.

SPEAKER_00 33:54

Alright, well, let's move on to what we're here for. Chocolate covered ants. That is a delicacy in Mexico. Easter season includes unusual sweets. And yes, and I can't even pronounce that name in Mexico, but we'll just go on. Chocolate-covered insects make a crunchy protein packed treat. Crunchy, yes. Protein, yes. Alright, egg tart and bean soup combo in Japan.

SPEAKER_01 34:21

Now, what the hell? Egg, egg tart? And bean soup combo.

SPEAKER_00 34:26

Well, let me let me some regions of Japan mix sweet and savory in odd ways during spring festivals, like pairing egg tarts with sweet red bean soups during Easter or spring celebrations.

SPEAKER_01 34:36

What the hell's an egg tart?

SPEAKER_00 34:38

I have no clue. I thought maybe you could educate me on that. Oh, oh. Since you like mountain oysters.

SPEAKER_01 34:44

I d I do know now what an egg tart is. I've just realized those are what we call the LGBT chickens. Okay. They laid the little tardy eggs. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_00 34:59

Yeah, so that's what that is. Okay. I don't think that's right. But, anyways, pickled herring, Sweden and Poland. While it might be traditional in some areas, the idea of fish on a holiday associated with chocolate and bunnies can definitely feel a bit like what the fuck? I had that. However, I do kind of like pickled herring. Really?

SPEAKER_01 35:22

Okay. I've I mean, I like sardines.

SPEAKER_00 35:26

You just went down like 10 points. Oh, okay. That's no big deal. Six for me, so.

SPEAKER_01 35:35

Yeah, but see, I'm already deficient in my score, anyways. You are? Oh, okay. All right. You can drop me a hundred.

SPEAKER_00 35:43

Okay, well, moving on to the UK. Hot crust bun pizza. A bizarre twist on the classic spice bun. Some experimental bakers have turned it into a pizza with icing drizzle on the top. That's stupid. And I think we've done this one before with weird foods. Yeah. That is messed up. What is the drizzle on the top? Should I even dare ask? Well, first off, Do I want to know?

SPEAKER_01 36:05

Hot cross buns. The song? Yeah. Okay. My son came home with a damn flute. And that's all I heard for eight months. We gotta learn this song, dude, dude, dude. Did you not learn it in one city? Blind mice, you dumbass. That's not hot crossbuns. That's the first thing I learned on my bass guitar. Anyway, so we we get past that point. And yeah. Yeah, hot cross buns. Okay, and then the flute part. Here's the carried away. Right.

SPEAKER_00 36:35

We don't want to go there. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 36:37

Remember Band Camp?

SPEAKER_00 36:38

Easter Lamb Cake, Germany. Instead of chocolate, Germans sometimes make not chocolate Germans. There's a pause there. Instead of just chocolate.

SPEAKER_01 36:49

Okay, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 36:50

Germans sometimes make sponge cake is sponge cake shaped like lambs. But the cake is often heavily decorated and a little creepy looking. Okay. Sorry about that. That's not funny. It's not funny at all.

SPEAKER_01 37:06

You can't say that.

SPEAKER_00 37:07

I didn't mean to. I did. I didn't mean to. Okay. That works. Okay. Let's move on to strange Easter traditions, Tom. Oh God. Just saying this. Swallowing Easter eggs. Czech Republic. In some parts of the Czech Republic, there's a traditional Godfit worse of women getting spanked lightly with braided willow sticks by men. But after that, they might drink small chocolate eggs in a very unusual celebratory ritual. Uh oh. What the hell is going on in the Czech Republic, man?

SPEAKER_01 37:41

This will show up discreetly on your credit card.

SPEAKER_00 37:44

What the hell is going on? Some parts of Czech Republic, there's a tradition of women getting spanked lightly with braided willow sticks by men. But after, they might drink small chocolate eggs in a very unusual slippery crack. I don't know what's going on in the Czech Republic. Yeah, they might. Wow. Okay. How about Poland Hungry? They have water fight day. Easter Monday. It's called Smiggus Dingus. Something like that. I'd probably push the shit out of that. Smiggus Diggus. People douse each other with water, sometimes from buckets. Well, what else are you dousing with? Dous your dingus? Supposedly to wash away sins or just prank friends and strangers. I'm gonna douse myself. How is me dousing myself in water pranking you?

SPEAKER_01 38:27

Right, right, right.

SPEAKER_00 38:29

You're an idiot. Look at me. Yeah, you're an idiot.

SPEAKER_01 38:33

All wet. And an idiot.

SPEAKER_00 38:36

Alright, how about this one? Jumping over babies. Spain and Catalonia. At the ball del Diablo. Uh Diablo? Whatever. Diablo. Festival. No, it's not Diablo. I don't want to say that. Not the devil there. It could be close.

SPEAKER_01 38:51

Yeah, when you jump over babies.

SPEAKER_00 38:53

Festival in some regions. Adults actually leap over babies. It's a symbolic ritual for protection and good luck. More bizarre than it. What if you bland on the kid? How is that good luck?

SPEAKER_01 39:02

Yeah, you're not gonna have good luck. That tells you right that. Stop the kidding your kid. Well, see, you you're not okay. Well, it gave you that information right there. Don't do it. You're not gonna have good luck this year.

SPEAKER_00 39:14

Don't do that.

SPEAKER_01 39:14

You killed your kid. Yeah, now what?

SPEAKER_00 39:16

Now what? All right. Uh next one. Easter witching in Finland. Finnish children dress up as Easter witches. What the? What's an Easter witch? Painted faces, wearing colorful clothes, and going door to door for candy. Kind of like Halloween, but in spring. Hey, these people are onto something.

SPEAKER_01 39:33

Yeah, man. Two times for candy. Wow. Excuse me, this is how Easter Witch. Where's the bunny? Where the hell's the candy woman? Where's the Easter bunny?

SPEAKER_00 39:46

All right, in the UK and Switzerland. Rolling eggs downhills. That's always fun. In parts of England and Switzerland, people literally race eggs downhills. You're supposed to use a hard-boiled egg, but sometimes the eggs break, making it messy. Well, if it's not hard-boiled, it's going to be messy. Are these people stupid? Well, my egg broke. Dumbass.

SPEAKER_01 40:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 40:09

Well, that's some strange traditions. I mean, some of the foods aren't too bad. I don't know what egg tart and bean soup combo is, but you like pickled herring. I got something pickled you can try. No. Hot cross bun pizza? That sounds stupid. Trevor Burrus, Jr.

SPEAKER_01 40:23

Well, what are you going to drizzle that with?

SPEAKER_00 40:25

And I want to know what an Easter lamb cake is. An Easter chocolate Germans. Oh. Instead of just chocolate, Germans sometimes make sponge cakes shaped like lambs. Okay. Now that I read it again. Anyways, that's um weird Easter traditions and foods. So, Tom, we've reached the end of our podcast.

SPEAKER_01 40:52

No, no, no.

SPEAKER_00 40:53

That's just this is the MT Alternative Podcast.

SPEAKER_01 40:55

Exactly. Exactly. Everybody knows us. We make light of everything. But okay. We appreciate this time that we're given to come to all y'all and just have a good time.

SPEAKER_00 41:09

Exactly. And uh before we go, Tom, I think it's uh we're gonna start a new segment. Okay. Uh things we absolutely solved today. Yeah. That's pretty much it. For example, we officially determined that every band was better than the year we were 16.

SPEAKER_01 41:25

Yes, exactly.

SPEAKER_00 41:26

And no amount of whatever anybody tells us streaming or anything is gonna change my mind.

SPEAKER_01 41:30

You can't stream anything like that.

SPEAKER_00 41:32

So Ario. We also solved the mystery of why people leave voicemails.

SPEAKER_01 41:39

Oh yeah. Yes, we did that.

SPEAKER_00 41:41

Why do they start with hey, it's me? Yeah, I have caller ID. I know who the hell it is. But you know what? I'm guilty of it sometimes too. Hey, it's just me. Yeah, okay. Dumbass.

SPEAKER_01 41:51

I I can tell. Or I like when I call, hey, it's Tom Rousey.

SPEAKER_00 41:56

Oh, I wouldn't have known.

SPEAKER_01 41:57

Thank you for telling me. Thanks. You're the only Tom I know. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 42:02

Oh, okay. Tom Rousey. Anyways. So yeah, we solved nothing.

SPEAKER_01 42:08

Oh, but we had a great time doing it.

SPEAKER_00 42:11

Yeah. A beautiful day.

SPEAKER_01 42:12

We're gonna try to solve it again. And again. We'll keep trying. We're gonna keep trying, and you all just listen to us and we'll we'll hopefully we get it right someday. Yep, we're gonna go together.

SPEAKER_00 42:23

We'll solve some problems. Anyways, folks, thanks for listening. Apple. Apple now. Wow. I know. Finally accepted us. Uh main website, mtalpod.com. Check that out. Little microphone on the bottom. Leave a message, leave a review. We suck, we suck. You like it? Think uh anything we should do different. Any music that you want to talk about? Any bands you like?

SPEAKER_01 42:49

We're here for it, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 42:50

We'll talk about anything. This is the MT alternative.

SPEAKER_01 42:53

Exactly.

SPEAKER_00 42:55

I think that's it, Tom.

SPEAKER_01 42:57

Okay. And as usual, we would always like to thank God for the gift of Gab.

SPEAKER_00 43:02

Everyone, take care. Enjoy your Easter week there. God bless. Later.