Blue Collar Business Podcast

Ep. 49 - Making Time for What Truly Matters

• Sy Kirby • Season 1 • Episode 49

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Time—the ultimate non-renewable resource. For blue collar business owners juggling family life with entrepreneurial demands, time management isn't just a productivity hack—it's survival.

In this raw and revealing second installment of our Date Night series, my wife Sara and I pull back the curtain on how we manage the constant tug-of-war between business and family time. From our hectic 5:30am wake-ups to the delicate dance of bedtime routines, we share an unfiltered look at what keeps our wheels turning while trying to preserve our most important relationship.

"Prioritize the moment" became our unexpected mantra during one particularly stressful exchange, and it's transformed how we approach each day. We candidly discuss those times when the business completely engulfed our marriage, like during a challenging partnership dissolution while simultaneously building our home and raising young children. These crucibles taught us painful but necessary lessons about what truly matters.

The mental shift from "work mode" to "family mode" is something I still struggle with daily. Those 5-10 minutes in the driveway before walking through the door have become a sacred transition time. Meanwhile, Sara shares her perspective on handling the overwhelming mental load when there's always something else demanding attention.

Our Sunday evening calendar check has revolutionized how we function as a team. This simple practice ensures family events get priority scheduling before business commitments hit the calendar, preventing the resentment that builds when important personal moments are forgotten or dismissed.

Whether you're building a business with your spouse or simply trying to maintain a healthy relationship while pursuing entrepreneurial dreams, this conversation offers both practical strategies and the comfort of knowing you're not alone in the struggle. Join us as we share what we've learned about protecting, sharing, and maximizing our most precious resource—time together.

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Speaker 1:

Hey guys, welcome to the Blue Collar Business Podcast, where we discuss the realest, rawest, most relevant stories and strategies behind building every corner of a blue collar business. I'm your host, cy Kirby, and I want to help you in what it took me trial and error and a whole lot of money to learn the information that no one in this industry is willing to share. Whether you're under that shade tree or have your hard hat on, let's expand your toolbox, guys. Welcome back to another episode of a special edition Blue Collar Business Podcast. We are calling this Date Night, if you missed part one.

Speaker 1:

Part one was about intimacy and personal connection and emotional. Just basically how we deal with each other's emotions during marriage and business do. I have my wonderful wife sitting down with me and we're doing a four-part series here and essentially the podcast is kind of laid out like a little bit of a date night. We've got an appetizer course, first course and, if you missed, the main course, questions. Yesterday I even teared up, so that was pretty cool. Today's episode is all about time and how to protect it, share it and not lose each other in the middle of a nonstop schedule. So let's get into it. Mama, thanks for co-hosting. Again, I really like you co-hosting. I'm not going to lie. I think we could probably bring some guests in and you could help me co-host this show very well. So what's a typical day look like from for us wake up to shut down?

Speaker 1:

um well let's just start right there, so they know what we're facing.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, so you want a summer schedule or school schedule? Give us school schedule, okay school schedule. Okay, school schedule is 5.30,. Wake up, mom and daddy. You and I get ready, we start the day. Then I typically will go start on the kids' lunches, getting them up, getting the breakfast. You will get your day kind of planned and Look at the four calendars.

Speaker 2:

Yes, and kind of do that, and then we all will typically walk out the door about 7, 7.15. And then from there, well, we say prayers, walk out the door, you go to work, depending on what your day looks like. I don't know what you do during the day, so I can't attend to that, yeah.

Speaker 1:

I do nothing.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, you just go to the office.

Speaker 1:

That's right, you just sit there.

Speaker 2:

Whatever, and then I will drop the kids off at school and then come back to the house and get myself ready for work and the day, and then I will work Either or Handle all the personal things and the day, and then I will what Either, or handle all the personal things that floated in our lives. That's true. Doctors of White Nights DMV trips.

Speaker 1:

Football games, basketball games.

Speaker 2:

I won't get ready for this and that.

Speaker 1:

Your day can be consisting of working on APAR, or it can be running to full of appointments. A-p-a-r, or it can be run into full of appointments, but your one definite day you're in the office is Wednesdays.

Speaker 2:

Yes, whether it's summer or Yep. Yeah, wednesdays is my office days. If you need me at the office, wednesdays 9 to 2. Okay, that's when I work in the office.

Speaker 1:

That does not mean that's the only time I'm working, but we actually just got you a wonderful desk set up at home.

Speaker 2:

Yes, and it's going to be so glorious. I'm so excited I can actually sit in our main living space and work with the kiddos During summertime, yeah yes, we have more of a summertime schedule and that's kind of why we did it, but it's.

Speaker 1:

I mean, we have a very busy life, but okay, we get through the day.

Speaker 2:

get kiddos picked up, right Kids get picked up at 210, which seems really short. Now that we're like talking about it, I feel like when we went to school it lasted forever and now it's like 3, 30 or 4 o'clock 8 o'clock they start school and they're off school by 2 10 2, 30, I think, 3, 10, 3, 10 no 3 10 yeah, it's 3 10.

Speaker 2:

Mom, are you sure positive, you're in the school line by 2 10 probably so like we're about to start school schedule again, so I'll get back into the room of it. But even three o'clock does not seem like that long of a day, but I mean, I guess they're kindergartners, so it's not like kiddos scooped and sorry, we're heading, you're fine and we're heading for a house.

Speaker 2:

Yep, that's part of our day, yeah, and then dinner on the table by six. That's the goal. It's not always happened, but the goal is six o'clock. We try to have family dinner at six o'clock. Bedtimes. That's what we're kind of working with.

Speaker 1:

That's our family dynamic and yeah, obviously you guys know, um, my day can consist of um school schedule. I want to. I want to throw this out there, since we're talking about time today and something it's more valuable to me than money. Took me a long time to figure that out, but I take the kids to school on Tuesdays and Thursdays. We're going to get into a little bit of how I ensure that family time is there and it's important for me on Tuesdays and Thursdays to get that little bit of time with my babies before I start the day, and it's rejuvenating. I get to see them, I get to tell them to be a leader every single time they get out of that truck and I get their hugs and their kisses. Mama really likes it. But five days a week of the same thing, it's a lot. Hand throw baby K on top of it.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, this we do have to say, like our schedule is going to look much different this year.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it is.

Speaker 2:

Because we have a baby.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

So that's going to change things around a little bit, but my day can consist from being on a job site at eight o'clock going through a problem could be a sprinkled a little bit of filming at that job site, whether Will's with me or not. Maybe working with a superintendent on an issue, maybe working with a customer on some extra work. There's so many different things. I'm kind of serving that ops manager role still that ops manager role still, but, uh, and that project manager role, as we are having superintendent on a track. Um, that's going to alleviate a little bit of my time. And actually just really quickly here, guys, we're looking for an ops manager at SyCon. That would alleviate, um, a lot of the operations off of me and we're looking for the right candidate. We're not in any rush, but you can check out the application on LinkedIn or go to our website, syconexecom, and check out the job description there. Mama would really appreciate you showing up sooner rather than later Moving past that.

Speaker 1:

But our typical day, you just never know, on your side of the table, from 8 to 5. On my side it's going to be working and it's usually 7 to 5. Tuesdays and Thursdays I really strive to be home before 5 o'clock, right at 5 o'clock. Some days it just doesn't flat happen. But if I'm going to sacrifice that family time it better be for something really dire stress situation either emergency for tomorrow, you know, have to go get a certain kind of tool that night. Mean, it's really gotta be something.

Speaker 2:

So anyhow, I'm just trying to preface that I really cherish that time and do you ever feel like you 100 clock off of work or do you feel like you more? So you know shift change from work to home.

Speaker 1:

Really good question. The day-to-day stuff leaves me pretty easily, but the vision, the future, where it's going, where it could go, that never stops and it's I know, but do you ever feel like you get to clock out of cyclone and come home?

Speaker 2:

so you just like shift, change from like the day-to-day it's a shift it's a mindset shift yeah like I still am.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and I struggled with this identity crisis for a very long time. You know there's people that still call me Cyclone, like that's all they know me for, but I'm Cy Kirby at the end of the day yeah.

Speaker 1:

And it's you know for me to differentiate the two. Me personally, you've watched me go through this identity crisis, especially over the last year. Definitely shift change, to answer your question, but it's a shift in my mindset and no one knows better and has seen me do it. There's some days I'm terrible at it and there's other days and I'm much better at it.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Not that I want to be thinking about work, not that I want to be thinking about the day-to-day or this bill or that bill or this invoice or that estimate. I want to be thinking about what baseball team Colts can end up on in the fall and how Sadie's an incredible artist and won her kindergarten art show. Baby K is just literally changing me. I've said it so many times very publicly his third baby. She got me. He's bad and uh, changing me for the better though, and making me see things a lot differently. And uh, it's hard, guys. You guys know how hard it is. It's I think we said this in the first episode as well.

Speaker 1:

You learn through experience about the things that are really important. Absolutely Like when I, when I say that I'm talking about business stuff, that youth view in year one and year two are just going to take you out, they're just go bankrupt right now. And in year one and year two are just going to take you out, they're just go bankrupt right now. And in year six, you're like that's a Tuesday, bro, like calm down. You know what I mean. Yeah, I'm not even. It's not a lie, guys. I mean it's just experience. And you figure out that. What if that your mind is going to immediately because of this cause, this in effect, that effect, you're just thinking, oh, it's over. But once you live that effect because of that cause, you're like, well, it really ain't that bad. And so I think through that process you really start to understand that, yeah, it's really not a big deal, that'll be there tomorrow, it'll all be there tomorrow.

Speaker 1:

Oh yeah, and it definitely does take some thought process. I would say the biggest and I know there's a lot of blue collar guys that would agree with me it's that five to ten minutes out in the driveway and I know I can't tell. There's some times that I spend time a little bit longer but that when I rush into the house and I don't have that five to 10 minutes, say a little quick prayer Good Lord, help me, bury this, put away on the shelf. I gotta be there for them, kiddos, tonight. I gotta be there for mama. She had a hard day today and she just heard you know terrible news all day and every scenario she's had.

Speaker 1:

And I know when I walk through this door I've got to be her pillar of strength and you may be absolutely crushed beyond existence but you have to pull yourself together, find strength within yourself for the good Lord and walk in there and be that dad and be that husband, even when you can't. And it's hard, guys, it's really, really hard, but that five to ten minutes in that driveway for me helps me. Quote unquote clock out.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

But as you know, Malin, you would probably agree that it's really hard to just fully clock in oh yeah, no, absolutely. Well, we're moving here. That's a little appetizers for you Moving on here. I got a question for you, mama when is a time that the business completely oh man, y'all ready for this? We're going right into the first course here. When is a time that business completely took over our life, and how did it impact our marriage?

Speaker 2:

Well, I don't know how much you've talked about this on the podcast, but when we originally started PsyCon, we had business partners and we end up parting ways with them.

Speaker 1:

Very non-conducive agreement.

Speaker 2:

The thing is is that you, looking back, you have 2020 vision, but in the moment, like, we thought we were doing what was best and you know, if we could go back and do it again, we would do differently, but we can't. So we learned. But when we were exiting the partnership, um, it was a really chaotic time. It just really turned um the business into like our whole life and, um, when that was happening, we were also building our house and we were also running the business. We had two young babies.

Speaker 1:

Living in 586 square feet, we had two dogs, two kids.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah, but I mean, I think during that time it really caused you and I to I feel like we grew in our strength separately but we were not working together as a team to get anything accomplished.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, there was no cohesiveness.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1:

So it was like I was trying to do what you needed me to do, and you were trying to do what I needed to do.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

We really didn't communicate. Yeah, this is really what I need.

Speaker 2:

We were not working together at all exactly at all yep at all. It was a trying time unbelievable yeah thanks for not giving up on me yeah, thanks for not giving up on me too. Didn't make it easy, that's for sure neither one of us did no and uh.

Speaker 1:

It's those experiences, though, that truly sharpen the sword.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Sharpen the tool. You know, the next time we've got to use the tool.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yep. How do you deal with the mental load when you're constantly thinking about the next job, the next invoice, next customer, even on date night, or kids baseball games?

Speaker 1:

I don't even know how to put it into words, because I still do it and I'm not going to sit here and lie like I don't.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

But the wandering mindset I know this sounds crazy, but it's discipline of if I'm at a baseball game. Look, I remember being a kid, whew Dadgummit, and my dad not being there.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1:

God dang, I didn't know I was going to go through a process during this deal, but you know, I swore to you that when it came to being a dad, that I was going to show them what it was supposed to be like not what I experienced and it's a lot easier for me coming from the broken place home.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

And having that experience through life of looking over at that sideline and going, eh, back then it was a hockey rink and I remember a lot of times searching for people you know, and I don't want my kids to ever do that.

Speaker 2:

No.

Speaker 1:

And so that makes the games fun and I'm super competitive, but that one's pretty easy because of trauma triggers. Yeah, but day and night, I'm sorry, sorry, mama, there's times you're sitting there and we'll be talking and we don't get date night.

Speaker 1:

I'm telling you guys, it is july and this is probably we have a six month old like the first time we've sat down with each other other than business, straight up business talk, where it had to be a business conversation, and but I mean still, I'm telling you guys, we'll go out on town, have a great night and then I'll just freeze. Oh my god, I forgot about this, this and she'll know hey, what do you think about?

Speaker 1:

nothing, nothing, okay, and we'll just move on. But hey, that's when you good, yeah, good, bury it, move on, because tomorrow it'll be there. She's too important, them kiddos are too important for us to um men, for us to miss it. They just need you to be there. You know, it's not even that hard.

Speaker 1:

You know, you just need to be there yeah oh, and I've made a lot of mistakes and I've all ain't missed but two ball games out of the five years he's played. Not missed a whole lot of practices and, uh, that's a little bit easier and I know you need me to be there yeah now it's taken me some time.

Speaker 1:

The first five years I was terrible at it, even when the kids were babies like, and also too I was kind of lost though straight up when them that first baby. I joke about it now every dad should have to have three kids, because you finally figure it out by the third one. You know, with baby Kay, baby Caroline, I have been there day one. I know what I'm supposed to be doing. You know he poops sleep, but there's more to it than that.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, absolutely poop sleep. But there's more to it than that and I'm more involved and, you know, with Colton, you know with our first two, it was well Sadio's a little bit better, there ain't no doubt. But Colt, I was not, I didn't even, I was working out still really hardcore. It just I had my priorities all messed up and you needed me and I wasn't, especially when Colt was first born and baby three, baby two, showed me that and I've, you know, definitely not tried to do the same thing twice. But sorry, I've gone a little off here, but truly, babe, I'm sorry for those day nines that I wander because I try so hard.

Speaker 2:

I know, I know, but I think it's also like there's times that I'm like yo stop talking about PsyCon.

Speaker 1:

Everything in our life is either the business, or the business or the kids yeah that's it, but that is our life oh yeah we've sacrificed a lot of our happiness and things that we've necessarily wanted yeah the boats, the, the fun stuff. We, we, we had some. We had a lot of fun in our 20s, but we worked our 20s away. Yeah, we did. And here we are sitting here, 33, 34 years old. I'm really excited about the future, babe.

Speaker 2:

Oh, yeah, no, absolutely.

Speaker 1:

But I look forward to always just being there. I just wanted you to know that I'm sorry on those days that I'm not real present. It's one. You know that I'm sorry on those days that I'm not real present. It's okay, although I want to be. Anyways, let's move on.

Speaker 2:

Life lessons and you know the moment you got it perfect, you're done. So it can take a little while to figure it out. You know how do we. You know what I am, so done with this.

Speaker 1:

I am the host around you. You keep asking me. I love it.

Speaker 2:

Babe, shoot a far away you just don't you, you just don't like the spotlight on me.

Speaker 1:

It's challenging whatever, especially these questions are challenging. I'm'm going to say I mean we're trying to be real with you guys and literally shine the spotlight on kind of our failures and our experiences. Yeah, and trying to be as real and transparent through our honesty when we didn't have it all put together, we're not Go ahead Mo.

Speaker 2:

How do we handle moments when one of us wants to rest? I'm really excited to hear your answer on this. How do we handle moments when one of us wants to rest and the other one is still in grind mode?

Speaker 1:

I don't even know how to answer that. We both need rest Really badly. We really need some rest, some true rest, especially in this last year, I know, but when I'm like Can we not clean the house today I'm so thinking about this and you're like I've got to have an answer tonight, babe. You're just looking at me like we're not. You're not gonna get anything, tomorrow's a new day and we'll talk about it tomorrow we comes in the morning honey does, and how do we handle?

Speaker 1:

it's harder for me because I'm always in grind. Look, since you met me, I agree with that.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, 100%.

Speaker 1:

And my mind is always six months, two years, five, six months, two years, five months. And I'm just constantly. Every move I make now, I know, defines six months from now, I know defines a year from now, I know defines a year from now. And I'm so hyper critical of myself so I never have enough time to overanalyze. And you're right, I am an overthinker and I overthink a lot of things.

Speaker 1:

But at the same time, when you look at me and you say, baby doll, I need some sleep email, hey, I've really had it. Will you take baby k? Or? And you never ask me, I can just see it though. I can see and I can feel the aura in the room of oh okay, she did just lay out an entire plan last night of everything that we're going to get done, but she needs rest and I want to enjoy that with you.

Speaker 1:

It's taken me probably until the past couple of years and still bad. Now I got to say I'm not the best at it, but really working on it. I got to say I'm not the best at it, but really working on it. And those moments where she kind of opens up to me, because Sarah is the person that will never let me see weakness. She feels like we're in competition all the time and like, well, he's not as hard as you. You had a hard day. I didn't do this and you did that, and I did this and you did it a hard day. I didn't do this and you did that and.

Speaker 1:

I did this and you did that and I said I didn't raise three kids all day, you know, and sometimes I just don't understand why her brain works like that. You know we're going at this together, but she just wants to make sure that you know she's being a proper team member and a team player. And I have to recognize and apologies for the slower recognition over the years to figure out that mom just needs a nap on the couch and that's okay at 2 o'clock on a Saturday and I'm not really wired that way. Never have been.

Speaker 2:

You wake up, grumpy Gus.

Speaker 1:

I am a grumpy Gus every morning. I've done there about that over the years now. But the other thing is I enjoy resting with her. And the other thing is is I enjoy resting with her as she doesn't? She almost opens the door to go hey, it's okay, you're allowed to slow down for four hours, sit on a couch, scroll TikTok, be, let me sleep, just sit right there. She don't want me going off and doing nothing, but she wants me sitting right there. It's just she needs it and we're each other's security blanket. She's my best friend, you're my best friend, and vice versa. And the security and peace that she offers is something to be desired, and I hope anybody listening finds that peace, and you'll find it through the good Lord above.

Speaker 1:

We said it on the first episode but all these struggles we faced up until three or four years ago and started going to that church as a family every Sunday and now we serve and we help out and even though our mouths aren't the best sometimes, but we love our Jesus and we try to do what's right and rest after Sunday on a church. That's where I was going with. That is kind of our recoup time. And I know you guys are like oh, I start thinking about Monday and I do too. As soon as church is over, I try to rest. But I'm thinking about Monday, I'm thinking about Wednesday, I'm thinking about Friday, I'm thinking about okay, that's the move Machines are there, all the things, all the questions are going to be coming, but I turn that off and I have learned 6, 7 o'clock.

Speaker 1:

You can start that. But the afternoon rest, let your mind rest, let your body rest. Some days are better than others. Two weekends, three weekends ago, I was stressed out of my mind. But I'm just trying to show you guys that it's not like it doesn't ever go away. You have to constantly choose those moments with your family out of grind mode.

Speaker 1:

Oh yeah, that's where I was going with that. Yeah, mama, I got one for you. Okay, how do you space? How do you make space for things outside of work Family time, personal time, rest when there's always something else it needs doing?

Speaker 2:

I mean, I don't not really I don't know, because there's always something else that needs a list of things yes, always, always. But it's just you know prioritizing, and you know um really really love making a list. I have them everywhere, all over the house, all the time, one for every occasion.

Speaker 1:

Ta-miha to make lists.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, they're glorious things, but I don't, you know, over the years I would let it consume me and not know how to get everything done and I'd feel like a bad mom because I'm like focusing on the work and, you know, feeling like a bad business partner Because I'm not like dealing with what I need to be dealing with in the office, or feeling like a bad wife because I'm doing mom things and business partner things. But you know, as we've burst through this chaotic life, I've just realized that, you know, there's only a few things that are going to completely take us out. And you know, luckily we've got the good Lord on our side and so I'm just going to have faith that everything is going to be okay. No-transcript.

Speaker 1:

A hundred percent of the pie.

Speaker 2:

Honestly, we all do well, yeah, well, yeah, no, absolutely you can't. But but to be able to do what I can in every, in every aspect, I have to fully commit to that portion of what I'm doing at that time, and so it gets overwhelming and it gets frustrating, sometimes feels like I'm constantly just running in circles. But you know, I just have to prioritize what is most important in the moment, you know literally that's one of our mottos.

Speaker 1:

I don't know it, just I spit. I can remember the day and I just spit it out one day, just prioritize the moment. And I was just stressed and I was. It's one of those conversations like hey, I really need an answer out of you, like right now, so I can make this decision tomorrow. And mama bear's over here, I'm not saying I remember right, but it was more of a kid pressing moment rather than it was a work pressing moment. I'm like prioritize the moment and my delivery was so bad. But she did come back and was like no, I understand the prioritize the moment thing and heard her start using it, but it would have been better delivered if I would use it in a in a different way. And I'm glad it slipped out because I've lived by it as well.

Speaker 1:

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Speaker 1:

So this, this last little bit of dessert, as we've been going through our date night and the main courses have been main courses. Yeah, my God, um, a big one for me. That I was terrible at from time scheduling and planning and list making and all of those things. I was terrible at it and sarah was much, much, much better at it. Now, the rules on the planning and scheduling. You're still the queen list maker, there's no doubt, but I have two different sets of books that I run lists on. We have a a whole year. It's not fully updated in our room but it carries our personal dates that I need to put into my calendar, or Sarah puts them in there, but anything that mama needs me to see from the kids, et cetera, it's on that calendar. I have another year calendar in my office to be looking at and it's more weather related and more significant events for business, but then I have an outlook calendar. That's the actual dead set.

Speaker 2:

And that's the day to day where you need to be. At what time?

Speaker 1:

And if it's on that calendar, I will be there, if not, I won't be there. And how I set that calendar there. If not, I won't be there. And how I set that calendar. Um, where I'm going with this here, guys just follow me.

Speaker 1:

But how I set that calendar, hey, mama, what we got going on in the next three months? Uh, well, colt's starting football again. Uh, we got flag football. Oh uh, he, he made the au baseball team. Or we're starting up rec league again. Oh, sadie's got cheer and Baby K's got three appointments this week and I really would love to get my nails done at some point. Okay, well, I mean.

Speaker 1:

And therefore, this spring, seven days a week, we had baseball, football, baseball, football, football, baseball every day of the week other than Sundays, but we squeezed a practice in there. It was challenging on top of everything else, but I made that prioritization first. That's what hit my calendar first, his entire baseball schedule, cheerleading football, all of that made it onto my work calendar first, and then I schedule around it Okay, go to the team, what's the next most important things? Start prioritizing, put them on the calendar, move on.

Speaker 1:

But if you guys don't have that calendar together, I severely encourage you to start today, because there's things that are important to my beautiful wife here, that are majorly important to her, that are if you screw this up, sigh, you ain't coming home with teeth, or and it may be on a one rector scale on my world, but if she doesn't share with me how important this is. And how do they do that, gentlemen? Well, they tell us three times, right. Well, if you, literally she'll be telling me a date and I'll grab my phone and I'll, if it's something of the you know, of importance, I'm sitting there putting into outlook, right then, so I don't freaking forget, I still forget things. Don't get wrong, by god. But at the same time, we have set our family's priorities first and then we start into the work priorities.

Speaker 2:

And I think that, especially with school coming up about to get started again, we've kind of you know, pulled away from it a little bit while we were in summer break. But Sunday evenings we do a calendar check. I pull up my calendar, he pulls out his calendar. We make sure all the important stuff is on. Both things, um, and you know, just ensure that I know where he's going to be at, he knows where I'm going to be at, his important things, my important things, and just it really allows for us to support each other instead of like work against each other. That's right, yeah.

Speaker 1:

And we did that for a lot of years.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, we did no it's fine.

Speaker 1:

And that's because my wife was like you've got to write this crap down and that's what I'm telling you guys on the show all the time. Like I struggled with all of this stuff starting off, like I was not a great list maker, I didn't run a schedule, I didn't have a company schedule, I didn't have a personal schedule, I just willy nilly, did it all. Well, and then you wonder why you can't ever make it to nothing. Well, that's because you're not playing it and you're only as good as you're playing. Don't get me wrong. We're in the underground construction business. It changes every three and a half seconds. But we make the plans, god makes the paths and that's something that's actually on her mirror here, as of late I read in a book, but I can't take credit for that. But I encourage you guys this week, if you haven't, this is what we're trying to do. There's a challenge from the first episode. Go check that out guys. But it's another little challenge here for you guys moving forward and hopefully you guys are getting a little bit of value out of this and maybe it's just the husband side of things. Maybe you share it with your wife or maybe it's the wife that's found this episode and shares it with her husband. But talk about it with each other and talk about, hopefully, some points that we've proved, like hey, that right there, they struggled with it too. We're struggling with this. Can we please just sit down and talk about it? Yeah, I truly hope, hope and pray that those doors are open for you guys, especially in your younger 30s, or if you're in your 20s and you're trying to figure this out for the blue collar skilled trade space and employ 10, 20, 30 people. They're depending on you and they're depending on your relationship being rock solid so you can be a leader in your business. So here's a little challenge for the week Sit down for 15 minutes and do a marriage calendar check.

Speaker 1:

We do it on Sunday nights. You're right. In summertime we've definitely alleviated off. Summer's been fun this year. I got to say we haven't done any vacations. We've been working away this year. We made that deal together this year and we were going to work through what we had to work through this year. So we didn't have vacations the rest of our lives, but this year was a grind.

Speaker 1:

Uh, I sorry guys, a little off track there. Sit down, sunday night could be Friday night before you guys start the weekend, whatever, but usually Sunday, moving in uh to Monday, ask your husband what's coming up at work could cause stress. Or ask your wife. You know, hey, what's in your world, um, ap, lady, ar lady who's stressing you out because you can't get them to answer the phone. To get jimmy bob pick up that check, bob, jimmy bob give me a check. And that's where she just gets to 10, and I got to step in and go hey man, where the heck is our money? Or it may be from, hey, baby, I really got to pay this bill, but I really don't think, you know in the early years, I really think we owe them that much. I think we've already paid them. Thank God for QuickBooks and all the things we've learned.

Speaker 1:

Paid them, uh, thank god for quickbooks and all the things we learned over the years say but uh, it may be. When can you carve out a pocket of time, even just an hour?

Speaker 2:

that's not about business or chores, and I'm gonna be honest please when you're raising a young family, there may not be a time that you can carve out that's not 9 o'clock when the kids go to bed but it is important. You know, and I suggest that you ask. You know touch base. Is there anything that you've been stressing about, that's been heavy on your heart, that you know, that you've been avoiding, that you want to touch base on before it. You know, builds that seed of resentment and you know. So just touch base.

Speaker 1:

Literally and be honest.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Hey, no, this is really bugging me. It's your best friend it's. And be honest, yeah, hey, no, this is really bugging me. It's your best friend, it's supposed to be yeah.

Speaker 1:

And if they got to continue guessing every single day? That's not how we treat our friends. You know, we're supposed to be honest, upfront. Yes, we love each other so deeply that we know if we tell her exactly how we're feeling, it might hurt her feelings or she might hurt mine, but you know what that little bit of hurt right then, and there is so much better than the continued daily hurt that I'm going to put her through or she's going to put me through.

Speaker 2:

Absolutely.

Speaker 1:

So, guys, thank you so much for joining episode two of Date Night. This has been really fun. Babe, I can't thank you enough for co-hosting in here. We're almost at episode 50. And so what episode were you? Number four or five, I can't quite remember. You were in the top ten because you were ten girls. But just a reminder to you were 10 girls, you know. But just a reminder to you guys, man, you're not alone. There's. Couples struggle to stay connected in major busy seasons, let alone if you're building a business together, building a family together. I encourage you guys truly, do a quick calendar check.

Speaker 1:

Find out what's important to each other, and next week's episode is about conflict and communication.

Speaker 2:

Can we? Put it in the bar communication, jingle Communication, sure does help.

Speaker 1:

Stay tuned for that. That's going to be a fun little episode. Small reminder, guys if you've loved these episodes or any of the other episodes and it's brought you value, if you wouldn't mind sharing it with somebody. Make sure you're subscribed on the podcast platform that you're listening to, or jump over to the bluecollarbusinesspodcastcom to watch or listen every single episode for free. You don't have to have a subscription. You can listen to it right there from the desktop version. But if you do have a podcast platform, give us a rating, share it with somebody. And till guys, till next time. Part three is coming at you with communication and conflict. Y'all be safe, be kind, be humble. If you've enjoyed this episode, be sure to give it a like. Share it with the fellers. Check out our website to send us any questions and comments about your experience in the blue collar business. Who do you want to hear from? Send them our way and we'll do our best to answer any questions you may have. Till next time, guys.