141 ~ A Simple Practice to "Digest" Your Life (Tool Box Episode)

You can have the best night out, the biggest breakthrough, or the most meaningful creative project and still feel oddly unfinished afterward. That’s very human, and it’s usually a lack of integration. We built this toolbox episode for anyone who wants to “digest” real life so the wisdom actually lands, the nervous system settles, and desire becomes a steady inner compass instead of a passing high.

We walk you through the behind-the-scenes debrief practice we use every single time we record. It’s a simple, structured reflection that mirrors physical digestion: take in the experience, metabolize what nourishes you, and let the rest go. Together we model the prompts using our own podcasting journey, including favorite moments, what has gone well, what could move from good to great, and the surprisingly powerful practice of naming where the other person shines. We also share where we see ourselves growing, especially around commitment, creative structure, and trusting our voice in conversation.

The secret ingredient is restraint. This is a “nothing extra” process: we answer, we say thank you, and we move on. No processing, no planning, no turning it into a long therapy session. The result is clean integration, stronger collaboration, and more access to what we actually want. If you’re searching for desire practice, emotional digestion, nervous system support, reflective prompts, or a simple debrief you can do alone or with a partner, this one is for you.

Debrief practice questions: 

What was your favorite moment? 

What went well? 

What could go from good to great ?

Where did your partner shine?

Where did you shine? 

A gratitude.

We use these questions/prompts after every recording to digest experiences and integrate what we learn. The prompts keep reflection tight and grounded to help us integrate the experience, without anything extra. 

Episode Bullets:
• why digestion applies to life experiences, not just food  
• how a “toolbox” practice creates integration after work, travel, retreats, parenting, or creative projects  
• the exact debrief prompts: favorite moment, what went well, what could go from good to great  
• noticing where the other person shines without turning it into a discussion  
• naming where we see ourselves shine and building self-trust over time  
• closing with gratitude and why we avoid processing or planning during the debrief  

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:07

Welcome to Desire is Medicine. We are two very different women living a life led by desire, inviting you into our world. I'm Brenda.

SPEAKER_01 0:17

I'm a devoted practitioner to being my fully expressed true self in my daily life, motherhood, relationships, and my business. Desire has taken me on quite a ride, and every day I practice listening to and following the voice within. I'm a middle school teacher, turned coach and guide of the feminine.

SPEAKER_00 0:36

And I'm Catherine, devoted to living my life as the truest and hopefully the highest version of me. I don't have children, I've never been married, I've spent equal parts of my life in corporate as in some down and low shady spaces. I was the epitome of Tired and Wired, and my path led me to explore desire. I'm a coach, guide, energy worker, and a forever student.

SPEAKER_01 0:58

Even after decades of inner work, we are humble beginners, on the mat, still exploring, always curious. We believe that listening to and following the nudge of desire is a deep spiritual practice that helps us grow.

SPEAKER_00 1:12

On the Desire as Medicine podcast, we talk to each other, we interview people we know and love about the practice of desire, bringing in a very important piece that is often overlooked being responsible for our desire.

Digestion As A Life Practice

The Debrief Prompts Begin

SPEAKER_01 1:25

Welcome back to the Desire as Medicine podcast. This is Brenda, and I am here with my beautiful, amazing, wonderful co-host, Catherine. She is here with me. And we have been talking about, we're always talking about desire, but in the last few episodes, we've been talking about digestion, digestion of life, and how do we digest and integrate so we can really have the life that we want and the experiences that we say yes to to have more of what we want in our life. When we think of digestion, we usually think about food. And we we talk about that in these past episodes. And just like food, you chew it, you digest it, digest it, it gets absorbed into your body, and then you eliminate. It's the same thing with life experiences. Except we do it maybe in conversation or in writing or with our body. We do it in different ways. But whatever it is, it's the same kind of experience we're going to show you today in this toolbox. Did I mention that this was a toolbox episode? I don't know. Maybe I did, maybe I didn't. But in this episode, which is a toolbox episode, we're going to show you how to digest. We're going to give you a practice because these toolbox episodes are mini episodes where you get to play with desire. So we'd like to break it down and give you something that you can really get your hands in the mud of life and desire. We're going to show you how to digest your experiences. So maybe you had a night out, a weekend away, you had a big work week or a vacation, or you did went on a retreat or a course, or you raised some kids, or you had a career, or you had a marriage. Whatever your experiences are, there's a way to digest it that will help you integrate it into your life. So if you want to know more about that, go back and listen to our digestion episodes because they are really meaty and thick. Oh, they're like a good stew. So for today, we're going to give you our actual practice. You are getting a behind-the-scenes look at what Catherine and I actually do after a day of recording. I'm not kidding people. We do this every single time. We make time for it. We schedule it into our time together because it's that important. It's that important that we have a transition from our time recording and our time working and getting episodes out into going back and moving on with our individual life, whatever that looks like on that particular day. So let's get into it. Okay, so there's a couple of different parts for this, and I'm going to ask some questions, prompts, and Catherine and I will both answer them. So we did decide in advance what the topic of this digestion will be. And are you ready? Our experience that we're going to be digesting and modeling for you in this practice is our podcast, the Desires Medicine Podcast. We've been at this for a couple of years now. So we're really going to boil this down. This is going to be a good challenge for us. Okay. Catherine, hello. And are you ready? I'm ready. Great. Anything you would add to what I said so far?

SPEAKER_00 5:26

No, I think you summed it up beautifully. I really love that we're at this.

SPEAKER_01 5:32

Great. So I'm going to give a prompt and we're both going to answer it. And for those of you listening, we will share the prompts again at the end and also put them in the show notes so you don't have to freak out like you're going to miss anything. You're not. Okay. So the first question is, and this is based, Catherine, on our entire podcasting experience. Do you have a favorite frame, a favorite moment?

SPEAKER_00 6:00

Hmm. The first thing that comes to mind is the love series, the self-love series. That's my favorite frame of the podcast overall. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 6:18

Okay, that was my answer. Okay. So funny. It's so funny. That was literally my answer. Okay. I can okay, go ahead. No, no, no. It's great. Keep going. Keep going. It's great. So sometimes that happens in a debrief. And I could say the same thing that Catherine just said, but there's so much to digest in our few years of doing this together. I'm just giving you my thoughts in the moment. I'm actually going to come up with something different. So one of my favorite experiences, my favorite frames of our podcast was recording episodes one through eight, because I really didn't want to do them. I really wanted to have guests on and like get my hands in with the guests. And Catherine was quite clear and precise in her desire that she wanted to set a foundation first. And I'm really glad that you did because those episodes are a mini course on desire.

SPEAKER_00 7:22

Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 7:24

Thank you. Next question: What's something that went well?

SPEAKER_00 7:34

I would say the slow and steady growth of our friendship, our co-hosting, when we left Clubhouse, and I made the request, the invitation of doing the podcast, and you said yes. And we took over a year building a foundation and meeting once a week. I think it was a year and a half, meeting once a week, talking about desire, talking about the podcast, even though it wasn't even created. I think that went extremely well. And I can see us reaping the benefits of that still. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 8:17

Okay, my answer. Something that has gone really well in the creation of this podcast has been calendaring. We've increased our time together on the calendar. We realized two hours of recording actually just takes us four or five hours because we need to connect, we like to pause for lunch, we don't like to rush, we need spaciousness. And we recently made another adjustment to that, which is we added a co-working day before our recording days. So today is a five-hour recording day on the calendar, and we co-worked yesterday for three hours so that our time could be even more efficient and we're even more connected. And I think that that has gone extremely well for us.

SPEAKER_00 9:08

Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 9:10

Okay. So I want to just interject slightly. If you notice, Catherine and I are not in conversation about these things during the debrief process. She's just simply saying thank you to my response, and I'm doing the same. And now we're going on to the next question. What is something that could go from good to great? Now, this is a there's no problem here. It's not like anything's wrong or bad. We're saying, oh, this podcast is going really well. And what's something that could make it even more amazing?

SPEAKER_00 9:49

For me, it's to find a structure that can hold our ideas for podcasts. I don't feel like we've fully found something that captures the ideas in the moment. It's still a work in progress. And I think when we get there, it's really going to feel like good to great in the creative time before we sit to record in the recording time and then even in the digestion time. That would be my vote for what would go from good to great.

SPEAKER_01 10:23

Thank you. I have so many answers for this because I have so many desires around it. I think what would make our podcast go from good to great right now is really getting our guests lined up for the future. Catherine and I have a really big desire right now to have on some guests to really get into the mud of desire with what people learned and really learn from them. But we haven't quite made that happen yet. So I think that would make it go from good to great.

SPEAKER_00 11:02

Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 11:04

Thank you. Okay, next question. And there's two more. What is a place where you saw the other person shine?

SPEAKER_00 11:18

I think you really shine in all podcast episodes, but specifically in the toolbox ones. I love how you like you just do a great job at reining it in. And I feel like a wild horse sometimes, and you just like really bring it in and keep it tight. I love that. Thank you. Thinking about which one I should say.

SPEAKER_01 11:41

You're really good at seeing the arc of the podcast. Like you have some magical site where you can just see from what we're talking about, what's alive for us. You're you're really good at teasing out what the episodes are and sometimes synthesizing them together and creating the arc and really, really seeing that and communicating it to me clearly. So I'm on board.

SPEAKER_00 12:12

Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 12:14

Okay. And last question. Where do you see yourself shine?

SPEAKER_00 12:21

Feels so on the spot. Uh I think the place lately where I have really seen myself shine is around my commitment to the podcast and the project. And really being with where do I want it to go and feeding my desire there in that corner, and then translating that to you so you can see where like I'm steering the ship, and I feel stronger in that area. I don't know if it trans has translated that way, but it feels a lot stronger today than it did the day that I asked you, will you do this podcast with me? Thank you.

Gratitude Plus Rules Of The Debrief

SPEAKER_01 13:08

The place that I see myself shine is in my comfort and trust in podcasting, I am way more comfortable with writing. I'm a writer. It's not that I've never spoken, I have, but it wouldn't be my first choice. I would way rather pick up a pen and paper. So I've really worked on I think this whole podcast journey has been me learning to just be present in the moment because there's so many things happening when we're recording, and getting out of my head and just staying in my body and trusting. That's been such an area of growth for me and a place where I think I've really shined personally. Thank you. So those are our questions. And I want to preface that you can always do this with another person. It's a great activity to do on a car ride home. You could do it with kids, you can modify it if you need. And if you're by yourself, you can still do it. So for that last question, where you saw the other person shine, you could just turn that on to yourself. Where did you see yourself shine? You can always end with a gratitude as well. That's always a beautiful digestive way to end. What are you grateful for? Let's actually pop that one in there, Catherine. What are you grateful for?

SPEAKER_00 14:39

I am grateful. A place where I'm grateful is for both of us. I'm grateful that this project has increased our skill in so many areas. I'm grateful that it's grown us beyond what I imagined.

SPEAKER_01 14:54

Thank you. I am so grateful for the day that you asked me to talk about desire in public. It's such a it's such a great question. It was such a beautiful invitation, and there was no hesitation. But I'm so grateful that you really had the courage to know what your own desire was and communicate it to me.

SPEAKER_00 15:22

Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 15:23

Yeah. So a couple of things about this practice as we wrap up. You'll notice this is a nothing extra practice. There's the structure of the questions. We each gave an answer. We're not processing it. We're not having a conversation about it. I'm not adding to what Catherine says, and she's not adding to what I say. We can always do that at another time. We're not processing and we're not planning. So we're not getting all excited and starting to plan the next future episodes during this debrief. We might build energy from this debrief and come back to it. So you can always go back. You can always go back and discuss that thing that someone said, but you don't have to do it now. And I don't recommend doing it during the debrief process. I definitely recommend keeping this a tight, cohesive, potent structure. And then it's complete. So that completes our debrief, Catherine. Thank you for joining me in that.

SPEAKER_00 16:29

Thank you for having me.

SPEAKER_01 16:31

Yeah. And thank you all for joining us in this toolbox episode. We hope that you find this practice really useful. I highly recommend trying it out. And I also highly recommend getting through the awkwardness of it. It might feel awkward at times, but it's one of those things where if you practice it, it does get more comfortable. And this practice is invaluable. I use it in all areas of my life. And it's just really helpful. So thank you so much for joining us today on the path of desire and digesting our experiences so they can integrate into our life and we can have more of what we want. That's our wish for you. Thank you, and until next time. Thank you for joining us on the Desire is Medicine podcast.

SPEAKER_00 17:27

Desire invites us to be honest, loving, and deeply intimate with ourselves and others. You can find our handles in the show notes. We'd love to hear from you.