Self-Worth Revolution: Tips for your Transformational Journey
Have you ever felt trapped in your own mind, unable to see a way out? Have you ever sat in a room feeling alone, ruminating, and asking yourself: How can I transform my life from darkness to light? How will I get through this darkness? I was once in that very room, feeling like the walls were closing in on me. But I chose to break free from my pain and trauma, and it changed my life forever.
Are you searching for your life's true purpose? Are you ready to find inner peace and tranquility? Do you want to live a life filled with abundance and happiness? Do you want to connect with like-minded individuals on a journey of self-discovery?
This is the right podcast for you. Self Worth Revolution is a podcast hosted by a survivor turned Transformational and Relationship Coach where I share my story and the stories of others who have survived and thrived. This is not a podcast of generic advice. This is a podcast where you will hear real stories of survival and transformation. Together, we'll explore the practical tips and strategies that have helped us live mindful, purposeful lives free from bullshit.
Are you searching for your life's true purpose? Do you want to live a life filled with abundance, happiness, love, and inner peace? Are you looking for actionable steps to improve your life? If so, this podcast is for you. Join me as we dive deep into topics such as:
- Overcoming trauma and pain
- Finding your higher purpose
- Living a mindful and purposeful life
- Cultivating abundance and happiness
- Achieving inner peace
Are you ready to transform your life? Tune in to Self Worth Revolution and discover how you can break free from your past and create the future you desire.
Self-Worth Revolution: Tips for your Transformational Journey
Unraveling the Layers: A Journey to Wholeness with Becky Parker
What if embracing your vulnerabilities could transform your self-worth? That's exactly what happened to Becky Parker, who joins us in this powerful episode of the Self-Worth Revolution Podcast. Becky shares her incredible journey of overcoming body dysmorphia and bulimia, touching on how societal pressures distorted her self-image and led to deep-seated insecurities. By letting go of her ego and addressing her inner wounds, she has fostered loving relationships with herself and those around her.
We go further to explore the transformative power of women empowering women and the importance of self-acceptance. Becky's candid reflections on her personal struggles illuminate how embracing our unique values and strengths can counteract external negativity. Through years of self-work and the unconditional support of a non-judgmental partner, Becky discovered her inner strength and the importance of self-worth in overcoming adversity. You'll hear how acknowledging and understanding our emotional triggers can lead to healthier responses and foster personal growth.
The episode continues to delve into the profound journey of healing by confronting deep-seated traumas and repressed memories. Becky discusses the challenges of accepting one's worth and the defense mechanisms developed from childhood experiences. Her story is an inspiring reminder that recognizing and releasing past traumas can prevent harmful patterns and help us embrace emotions as a healthy release. By sharing personal anecdotes and pivotal realizations, we underscore the necessity of self-awareness and the ongoing effort to cultivate healthier relationships with ourselves and others. Join us for this heartfelt episode as we explore the journey of self-discovery and the boundless potential of self-worth.
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The "The Self Worth Revolution" Podcast may, at times, cover sensitive topics including but not limited to suicide, abuse, violence, severe mental illnesses, sex, drugs, alcohol addiction, psychedelics and the use of plant medicines. You are advised to refrain from watching or listening to the Podcast if you are likely to be offended or adversely impacted by any of these topics. Neither The Company, The Host nor the guests shall at any time be liable for the content covered causing off...
Welcome to the Self-Worth Revolution Podcast.
Speaker 1:Today I will be interviewing Becky Barker. She is an amazing woman and true inspiration to many. She will be speaking on how letting go of her ego and diving deep into her inner wounds has not only created a loving relationship with self, but also with her family and friends, especially her husband, Eric, and daughters. She will also be sharing her story with the hardships of growing up with body dysmorphia and how it led her to her eating disorder of bulimia. According to the statistics of the International OCD Foundation, it affects 40% of men and 60% of women. This should not be swept away to be something that should be forgotten. We should be able to freely speak about this. With deciding putting so much emphasis on the focus of what it is to have external beauty, we have lost importance that beauty starts from within. You'll hear how this condition can distort our self-perception, making us feel flawed despite projecting confidence outwardly. Becky's story is one of incredible strength overcoming childhood bullying and battling with bulimia due to the body struggles, and also a way to cope with her anxiety and her sadness. She's emerged as a beacon of hope and authenticity to many. This episode is a powerful reminder that you are not alone. You are not alone in your struggles. It is a calling for you to embrace your true self, flaws and all Love yourself as a whole person. So hold on to your seats as you embark on a powerful conversation with Becky Barker and on the beauty of self-acceptance and self-love by letting go of the ego, breaking free from the grip of body dysmorphia, and how to cultivate the beauty of self-love to start living the life that you are deserving of living.
Speaker 1:Welcome to the Self-Worth Revolution Podcast hosted by Vivian Medrano. I am not only a podcaster, but a mother, a nurse, a life coach and a survivor. This podcast is about turning your pain into your power, your experiences into your lessons, and to start living a life full of abundance, inner peace and fulfillment. My higher purpose are for my listeners to find their self-worth and their value by following their path to greatness. We are all deserving of living our best lives. It is time to stop identifying with our past. Start living in the present for a better future. This podcast will have guest speakers that will share their stories of how they transformed their lives and found their worth. My mission is to let my listeners know this is your time to shine, To know that you are not alone. Healing is empowering. It takes courage to be vulnerable, and our voices have power. Hold on to your lives, because this will be an incredible ride of self-transformation, self-empowerment and radical change. It is time for us to take our power back.
Speaker 1:Let's tell me about yourself. I want to know more about you. Like we were able to connect on instagram and I thought like the connection was absolutely amazing. You're a doll and you like bring so much inspiration to so many people just by the things that you post. And aside of that, you're funny. You're so funny. Like I'm like how is this woman so creative in her content? Like you're just so funny. So then you like people gravitate to you naturally just because you know you just have like a spark to you and then you just have this humor that people just love to hear. You know it's a lot of people, it's a lot. It's hard for people to just have this sense of humor. It's not trying so hard. You know what I mean. Like it doesn't come naturally to people sometimes and I think to you like it's just a natural vibe.
Speaker 2:You know what? It's funny because I think that humor is kind of always been a little bit of my security blanket, you know, because I lacked confidence in myself as a person for so many years, especially my teen years, that I was like this class clown or this screw off, and you know, like you know it was, I made people laugh, you know. So then I continued doing it and sometimes I can be my husband will tell me I'm dripping with sarcasm because sometimes, like, I'm thinking it's like funny or humorous, but it's really being sarcastic and kind of kind of snarky. But yeah, I I hadn't. It wasn't until like the last couple of years where I finally started to started to become confident with my exterior looks and all that. And so, because I didn't have that confidence, I just use humor and all that you know.
Speaker 2:So I appreciate that, you know, I think that humor it helps keep things light, you know, and kind of not so serious. And you know I can remember my parents telling me like something would happen and I kind of laughed and they'd be like it's not funny and I wasn't laughing like in a bad way, it was more of kind of just like the awkward, like oh, you know but, Eric's always told me that he is so commendable that I can laugh at myself, I can trip or I can do something or totally be a klutz and I laugh like I mean, what else are you going to do?
Speaker 2:If you get mad at yourself, then it just makes you feel worse.
Speaker 1:You know it's so great because I think I used to do that to myself too. If I did a mistake or I did something, I would get so hard on myself and get so upset, and I think it's mostly that it was driven by embarrassment of what others would think right, like I was so imperfect. That was always like I felt like I was always the oddball and like my crowd. Yeah, I always stood out somehow in my crowd and maybe it was just things that I had within me that I felt that I stood out, but I really didn't. But inside of me I did. I felt like I stood out, but I really didn't. But inside of me I did. I felt like I stood out like a thorn right. And so it was so funny because now, when I do do something and then I think about it, I just start laughing. I'm like, okay, that was really really dumb of me to do that, or like it was just silly of me to do that.
Speaker 1:And now I could laugh and not worry what others on the outside think about, because now it's it's so good to not have to like seek their validation.
Speaker 1:You know, before we would want to always seek the outside validation and it was like we would change who we were. Or like my sister says, I'm really quirky, you know. So I know I'm like, I know sometimes like you could tell me a joke and I'm not going to it and I'm just going to be like I just didn't get that. I'm so sorry. Like I know it meant to be funny, but it just went over my head and so before I would just laugh and totally ignore the fact that I was like that wasn't a joke to me, you know. So now I'm able to say, like that wasn't funny, you know, like to me it wasn't funny when. Like that wasn't funny, you know, like to me it wasn't funny where. Before it's like, oh, I would just laugh just to fit in and I'm like no, I'll fit in with the right people, like I don't need to fit in everywhere and I'm okay with that right did you feeling like you were the black sheep?
Speaker 2:yes, yeah, me too.
Speaker 1:I did it that I guess it's because I was bullied at school. I was very thin and so I always looked at like how I looked People, would you know, make fun of my legs. My legs are too long, was too skinny, like I always had nicknames and people always thought they were fun and I was like, no, they're not funny. Like they're actually like really cruel nicknames that you guys have for me. And so I think then I became like the body image thing, like really cruel nicknames that you guys have for me. And so I think then I became like the body image thing like really affected me in a way, you know. And so I would look at myself and I didn't look at myself in a really kind way In myself. I thought other people would also see those imperfections that I was seeing, and maybe they didn't, but I could see it all the time. Like I would look in the mirror and I'd be like, yeah, I don't like that part of you, like this needs to be fixed, like this.
Speaker 1:And I think it's because, growing up as children, people point out the things that they don't like about themselves onto you, and so then you start believing that about yourself too. So it's a kind of program to believe, like long legs are ugly, skinny legs are ugly. Like, oh yeah, your nose is not perfect. Oh yeah, your lips are little. I have really small lips. That's the first thing people notice. Oh yeah, your lips are so tiny. And I'm like yeah, by the way, they are really small, right, like, but they're great on me, they're my lips, yeah.
Speaker 2:Isn't it ironic that so many times the things are what you want to call flaws or imperfections or just differences in us as individuals and you don't even realize it or become aware of it until somebody points it out. It's like that's. The saddest part to me is is if everybody would have this non-judgmental perspective and not point out. But they're projecting, like you said, it's they're pointing out because it's stuff within themselves that they don't like. So they project it on the others. But that's the saddest thing is we wouldn't have all these issues with our body or these you know insecurities, if people didn't point them out. You know, it's like just be kind and compassionate to one another. So it's kind of kind of sad.
Speaker 2:It's like I've, you know, realized stuff and I'm like, oh, I didn't even know that until that person said something you know, like my chest being small chested in high school or you know, always growing, I didn't realize like to. To me it was like everybody's different and all that. But then, you know, I had some boys you know mean boys pointed out, you know, make fun of me for being flat, and I mean then that became a huge insecurity for me. But you know, I guess that's part of, it's going to always be part of society. There's always going to be those people that will point out stuff, but that's the cool thing is that people like you and I and so many other women. I love this movement of women empowering women.
Speaker 1:It's about time you know, because for so long women were criticized women a lot, you know because they just felt like you couldn't be in a group of beautiful women because of your own insecurities and your own lack of self confidence, that you felt like, oh well, they're getting attention, I'm not. And I think it's so beautiful for now to be able to see that we're all beautiful, for now to be able to see that we're all beautiful regardless of how we look, like we all bring our own value into the table and we're being accepted for who we are, instead of like what we look on the outside but what we bring with ourselves. And I think that that's what's changing, and I think that's what's becoming more beautiful, because then women are starting to be able to be with one another without not criticizing one another or looking down at one another. And I think that that's important, because we're already getting that from the outside world that we don't need it from within. You know we should be able to uplift ourselves, and so I do.
Speaker 1:I see like such a radical change in that, and it makes me so happy because if we can't create that change within ourselves, to believe that we are so worthy of receiving that kind of respect, that kind of positivity into our lives, then we're going to continue to bring allow people to bring us down. We're going to continue to believe what people to bring us down. We're going to continue to believe what other people tell us is wrong with us. But if we start believing within ourselves, then we know that all that they say it's about them and not about us, you know. And so that's when we gain our power back. And so, and you know, some people don't like it and that's okay, you know, and that's because they need to be able to feel strong within themselves. And it's mostly like, if you see somebody growing, you kind of wish, they're like I wish I could grow and I want people to not wish so much and know that you're just as capable of living this life for yourself.
Speaker 2:You just have to believe yeah, and definitely it takes work and effort to do that. I mean I wouldn't be where I am today if I didn't. I mean I've had about five years with my own life coach guiding me and, you know, getting rid of negative beliefs, that these things that I believed in for most of my life, you know, and without putting in that effort and that work, I would have never gotten rid of it. I would have continued to live like with this void or this hole, like I've always been kind of, you know, a happy person. But did you ever have like where you felt like just something was missing, there was just something off? Like you're happy and you, you know you plug along, but just you know and I didn't know what it was until I finally got free from it that it was my insecurities holding me back. And you know these beliefs that I wasn't valuable enough, you know, and not for anybody else but myself, you know.
Speaker 1:Let's talk a little bit about that.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:Let's talk about that, so this outside world could know a little bit more about Becky and know that she's conquered so much.
Speaker 2:Well, it started at 15. Well, I want to say probably closer to 12. Like, I started getting little kind of insecurities and you know I would. I would like to say kind of just, you know your typical teen, you know you're awkward, going through puberty and changing and you're not really sure what's going on with your body and is this normal and all that. But what really hit me was when I was 15 and there was a comment made about my thighs and it was in my mind the message after hearing that, the message in my head was that I wasn't good enough or I wasn't lovable, or my thighs are getting big and I've always been. I was thin as a kid. I mean, I went into high school and I was weighed 97 pounds. So I was tiny, you know. And then by sophomore, year you know I've been.
Speaker 2:You know you go through the changes. And I was playing basketball, so I was putting on muscle, but I was also gaining weight. You know, I was getting curves and I was no longer that super thin girl and I struggled with you know how to get the weight off and like I had these feelings of just like wanting to like take a knife to my skin, just like shave off this extra, this bad, and all that. Like you know, I was not comfortable in my own skin at all. And then I got introduced to bulimia from a friend, binging and purging, and it was a way of eating what you want and I don't have to gain the weight and actually started losing weight. And then people started noticing that I was losing weight and then it was like, oh my gosh, this works.
Speaker 2:And what I did not realize was that the eating disorder was actually a strategy for me, it was a coping mechanism and I didn't know that. I thought it was just for many years, you know, and I I eventually got my parents found out that I was doing it and that became a huge thing. I, they put me in counseling as a teen and that didn't last long and you know, I promised, you know that I'd stop and all that, and so, and I couldn't, and I mean this went into decades of into my twenties, into my thirties and then finally, my mid thirties. I had met Eric and you know he had said that he would never judge me. He was the first person to tell me that he will never judge me for it.
Speaker 1:And he will never try to stop me.
Speaker 2:He will never try to convince me not to do it, that I have to want it. It's like alcoholism, like any addiction you have to want it. And he said that he will support me in any way that he can. And he with that also there was. I struggled with eating disorder, but I also struggled with anger and there'd be times where I'd lash out or I'd get really suspicious about. You know, what's he doing? Is he talking to somebody else? What's he doing on the computer?
Speaker 2:Like all my own insecurities, because he's never given me evidence that I should question him, you know, but there was just this suspicious, you know, like I had the eating disorder that I grew up with and then I also grew up with in an environment where you don't trust people and you know that it kind of I think my parents they tried to use it as a protection thing of keeping me out of trouble. And you know, like you know, guys just want to get in your pants. That's all they want, you know, and all that. But that never got cleaned up for me that, as you, once you find somebody that truly loves you, that's not all they want, you know. So I was battling with a lot of just the insecurity and fears and distrust. So there was those two things going up against my dating relationship with Eric. And then one day he asked me I mean, like I just like blew up at Adam for over nothing. He looks at me and he's like why are you so angry? And I'm like I'm. I just looked out the window and I couldn't answer. And we've been dating about two months and he came to me and he's like okay, this cannot keep happening. Like you know, I love you, but I can't keep going on with this anger. And so he offered that he would pay for me to go see his life coach and get some things figured out, like figure out, get to the root cause of why I was angry.
Speaker 2:I was suffering so bad with the eating disorder and my first year, again back to my childhood beliefs. You're just trying to brainwash me. That's what I told him. You're just trying to, you and your coach, you're just trying to brainwash me. And he's like so I went because I felt like there was something with this guy. I mean, I had been divorced for 12 years at that point from my first marriage, and we went and we did a session. I went in I told the, my life coach, all about my history and he's like, okay, and my, the eating disorder like you're not, that's not like really bad. And he's like, no, it's just a strategy you use to cope. And I'm like okay, and then I mean fast forward. I went for a while I was seeing him once a week and we do it FaceTime, just like this.
Speaker 2:And then eventually I realized that the eating disorder it was anytime I was emotionally triggered. Either I was upset or I was angry, or I was fearful. I would turn to that because it was like a release. It was getting rid of the emotions, how to deal with the emotions rather than use the eating disorder as my way of coping. And it was mind blowing to me because up until my mid thirties I thought I was just doing. It just had become habit, like smoking. But smoking, there again, is not just part of it is an addiction, but part of it is because you're using it to cope with something. So it's it's been an amazing revelation for me, and that's what got me into coaching. For others was it's like, oh my God, like people. I wonder how many other people don't realize like what actually is going on, what's underneath all there, and I could help them get free from their stuff too. You know, it's just, life has never been so good.
Speaker 1:And that's the hardest part is we all carry such deep emotions in us and you get triggered. And when you get triggered because you don't know how to be emotionally mature about your emotions yet, then you react and you act, a lot of times with anger. Some people withdraw themselves from the situation, don't talk about it and they just keep suppressing their emotions inside. And we all do it. It's kind of a protective mechanism that we do. It's kind of like that's when our ego is supposed to protect us. Right, that's when our ego comes in and protects us and we react and become angry. But now it, what's important for people to realize is that emotions are important for us, but how we respond when we become in that different phases of emotions whether it's anger, sadness, happiness, joy they're all forms of emotions but it's because our body's telling us something and it's important to not try to ignore that emotion, even if it is anger, because it may be a place where you feel unsafe.
Speaker 1:Maybe somebody said something that triggered you. Whatever it is, it's your body basically saying, hey, something that triggered you. Whatever it is, it's your body basically saying, hey, hold on one moment. What's wrong? What's bothering you? Let's reflect on this, let's identify the problem and let's work through it. But ignoring it it's not the answer.
Speaker 1:And becoming vulnerable with understanding what it is that's causing it doesn't mean you're weak. It just means you're stronger now because you're actually recognizing what your body is going through. You're appreciating what your body's going through by acknowledging it, and your body's basically saying Thank you, you're finally there, like you're listening to me. I've been trying to be there this whole time and you weren't listening.
Speaker 1:You know now you're listening, and so we tend to now, instead of be so reactive, we know how to respond in a much healthier way, because I'm sure that there's times where Eric may do or say something that may trigger you, because you're still going to have those triggers within us. It's not like we're healing and they vanish. No, they're going to be with us, like our past is still with us, but we don't resonate with it, we don't identify with it. We just use it as a way to empower ourselves. So now, instead of you probably reacting with anger as you used to, you probably respond in a more healthier way, by asking him a question or letting him know hey, what you just said right now kind of bothered me, and this is the reason why Can we sit down and talk about it?
Speaker 2:Exactly, and that's beautifully said, because, yeah, vulnerability, I think, especially in past generations, has always been made like it's a weakness and it's really not. Vulnerability and emotions are actually a strength. And yeah, because we're all going to have those triggers or those moments or things that upset us or cause some type of emotion for us or hurt. But now, having the skill set in how I go about it rather than scream back or yell, it's like you said, hey, that that hurt and I've even learned, it's so crazy. My daughter, she's 19, I've two, one's 21, one's 19 and she my 19 year old.
Speaker 2:We were just talking the other day. She's like mom, you have changed so much. She's like you know a couple, you know she was up here, was it last summer, and I had said something. And she's like you know a couple, you know she was up here, was it last summer, and I had said something. And she's like, mom, that was kind of mean. And I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm so sorry.
Speaker 2:I I didn't mean it mean at all and I totally owned it. I totally took accountability and apologized to her and she was telling me the other day that that meant so much to her because she's like years ago you wouldn't have said you wouldn't have owned it, you wouldn't have said that you would have just either blown it off or been oh well, you're being bratty or something you know, and so it. It's amazing you can take the same situation and respond completely different and you'll have a way better outcome and a way of a stronger relationship that the person feels safe with you, you know, and that goes with your partner, kids, friends, you know, but I would definitely say our kids and our partner are probably one of the two most important areas to really refine your skills and improve and I try to improve every day and I think you use like the perfect word safe.
Speaker 1:But it's not only that. Your family feels safe, right, and your husband feels safe and your daughter feels safe, but you feel safe, you are, you feel safe. And a lot of times the reason people don't want to tell somebody hey, that hurt me it's because you haven't felt that sense of safety from being able to tell somebody how you felt, because maybe you were in a situation where their response to you telling them how you felt was ignored, or they basically told you you're just too sensitive or you're too emotional. You know, like your feelings don't matter, like you're not being logical, and so then you start to ignore your feelings and you start to ignore your emotions.
Speaker 1:So when you're in an area where you feel safe and healthy and you're like, oh, this is actually the way it's supposed to feel, you're actually supposed to be able to tell somebody your feelings and they're going to respond to you in a positive way by acknowledging them. Oh, my gosh, like wait, is that really true? And so when you start feeling that way, because you're so familiar to not feeling safe and being rejected with how you feel or the emotions that you express, when somebody actually comes in and shows you what it is to feel safe. Now you start to become uncomfortable, right, but you have to go through that phase in order to become comfortable and start accepting what you should have accepted a long time ago. And I think that's the hard part of healing that people don't tell you about. As you're healing and you're acknowledging what you're supposed to be doing for yourself and you're now internally loving yourself the way that others should love you. Now you have to start becoming uncomfortable to become comfortable to accept that into your life.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's funny because I experienced that I came from a family that wasn't super affectionate and like huggy and all that.
Speaker 2:So when Eric and I started dating, know, and I hadn't gone through the full healing journey yet for me, you know, and he's a big hugger and he would like, you know, I'll go morning and he'd give me a big hug and he'd like hold me and I could feel like eventually, after a couple of seconds, I'm like okay, like let go of me, you know, like, but it wasn't anything other than because it was that awkwardness or that uncomfortableness of being vulnerable and I hadn't been taught that that's actually.
Speaker 2:It's a gift to be vulnerable and have that affection with people. And my daughter I recognize a little bit of it. When she one of my eldest she is I don't know, I think where she got it from was her dad very affectionate and I remember she was probably about seven years old and I had been divorced for a few years at that point and I was in the kitchen cooking and she just came up behind me and wrapped her arms around my waist and gave me a big hug and I'm like what was that for? She's like I love you and I started to like get a glimpse of the compassion and affection that I've always lacked, you know, growing up, and that I needed to do a better job for my to break that generational cycle.
Speaker 1:Oh, that's so beautiful. I have two of my own, and my son is extremely affectionate, and I always say I have two different type of children and I love them both the same, equally. My daughter tends to be a little bit more like her dad and my son, I would say, tends to be a little bit more like me. I'm very, very affectionate. I grew up with my mom showing me her love through her actions, and so my mom has been the one to really show me what it is to be able to forgive and show love, because she's been the first person to have to forgive and not break who she is as a person. And my mom is such a loving, endearing, honest person from deep in her heart. She doesn't try, it just comes naturally, and so that's what I grasped from her and that's one of my strengths that I got from my mom, and so I always grew up telling myself I want my son to know that it's okay to feel how he feels, and it's okay for him to hug and it's okay for him to feel love, because I didn't want him to have this thing where, oh well, man don't cry, where man can do this, man can't feel. You know, that's not manly and I and I was a single mom and everything but I didn't want my son to grow up like that because I saw what it was for a man not to be able to give that and I wanted my son to know that it's okay to give that. So my little girl, she has a big personal space. So my son always wants to go up and give her like these big hugs or he's always like, and I think the more that her space gets bigger, the more he wants to like, invade her space. And I'm just like you need to recognize your sister has a big personal space and you need to respect that and be. You need to be a little bit more like, okay, it's okay if he hugs me sometimes and it's okay for me to accept to be hugged, you know. And so you start understanding the different personalities.
Speaker 1:But they've taught me, my kids have taught me a lot, and that's what's hard for us parents sometimes to know that we don't always have all the answers to everything. And so my kids have taught me that it's okay to value their differences, like it's okay that my daughter doesn't always hug somebody, but that doesn't mean that she doesn't love any less, and it just means she loves differently, you know. And so I've come to acknowledge that, because growing up, we also thought that if somebody hugs you, then that means they love you. But no, that doesn't mean that they love you, you know, it goes beyond that. It goes beyond how they treat you, how they love their family, how they are as a person. And so now, instead of me always believing, oh yeah, if somebody hugs me, somebody does this, and that means they love me, I've come to appreciate it at a deeper level, where no people love differently, and that's okay, but it's not always in the words, it has to be in the actions that they display.
Speaker 2:For you, definitely so really neat that our kids, like you said, that our kids can teach us things, and that requires being an open-minded parent, that you're not too proud or not too good to know that you can learn things and that's that's admirable.
Speaker 1:It is. I remember one of the major things that my son taught me one time and I sat with him and we did canceling together and so I had to sit there and I had to listen and I couldn't say anything. I just had to listen to him and I'm like, okay, I'm sitting here and I'm listening. It was the most awkward moment for me, but I knew that I had to do it for him.
Speaker 1:You know, and I'm as a parent, the first thing you want to do is interrupt. You know, and I'm as a parent, the first thing you want to do is interrupt, right, like you just want to say before they finish. You, you tend to interrupt them, you just do because you feel you're right, and so I'm sitting there and I'm like I'm not gonna say anything, and I'm just like I'm not gonna say anything. I kept telling myself I'm not gonna say anything. One of the things that he told me that opened up my eyes and it was something that I was more mindful of doing was mom, if only you listened, if only you listened to me, then you would know that before you tell me what you were going to tell me, I was going to tell you exactly the same thing, just in my way, but you didn't finish and let me listen. You didn't listen, and so I started to listen, and that was really hard, because, growing up, my defense mechanism was to react before the other person could finish saying what they were going to say, because I always felt that what they were going to turn around and say to me wasn't going to be something positive. They were going to turn around and say to me wasn't going to be something positive. So I would kind of put like stop, and then I would speak instead of letting them speak. And so I started recognizing that because I was in, my emotions were imbalanced. I was creating that within my children and as I started becoming more emotionally mature with my emotions and understanding my emotions and not ignoring them, them and actually like accepting them and living with them, my children, in return, are now aware of how they feel as well and instead of reacting to things, they're more responding to things because they're seeing the way I am choosing to make the choices in life. Now, and it's never too late I'm 47 years old.
Speaker 1:It took me this long to recognize it, but we have to look deep down into nitty gritty and that's the hardest part. Like you were saying, we have to really look down inside, like our darkness that we have stored inside with us for so many years, and understand that the reason that we're acting the way we're acting or react the way we react is because it manifests from either childhood trauma, something that happened to us as teenagers, things that were told to us. You know, our mind has a great way of basically blocking some memories, you know. And so the hardest part of healing is actually getting down into that nitty gritty and saying, okay, I'm here, let's face it, what are we supposed to do? And grief through it, and that's the hardest part of healing. What you say, um, was your hardest part during your healing journey.
Speaker 2:I would say probably the hardest part for me was accepting that I was good enough and deserving of having a good life or having a good marriage or a good relationship you talked about.
Speaker 2:With the interrupting, I came to realize that I had this really bad habit too of you know, know, either for my girls or especially, you know, like, with Eric, and what I found was it there again, like you said, childhood. It stemmed from childhood and being on the defensive of you know always, or feeling like I'm always going to get in trouble, so I would interrupt to like, wait, wait, that's not how it happened, just so you know, because I'm defense mode, you know, but it kind of it. Yeah, it continued, even even when I was an adult and no longer a kid, that was in trouble. There was still. It was just that deep rooted defense mechanism. And, like you said, talking about repressing, you know our subconscious makes up over 99% of our mind and we repress any negative emotions or experiences to protect ourselves. So a lot of that gets repressed and you're not even aware, you're not even recognizing why you're doing it.
Speaker 1:That's the hardest part is that you don't understand why your body's going through it like you, just don't. You have no idea why it hurts, why you're shaking. You know why your gut is so off balanced. You just don't understand what your body's going through. But it's, it's there, and it's because we're not living consciously, we we're not aware of it yet you know. And so until we become aware and start becoming more conscious of what our body's going through and what the triggers are, then we're able to understand our body more fully.
Speaker 1:You know, and I think that's the hardest part is to just be very uncomfortable with not knowing. The unknown, and I think that's what happens with healing is that you start to unveil a lot of things that you had suppressed and forgotten about. And once you start healing, those memories start coming back. And then that's when you're like oh, it makes sense. It all starts to like, the pieces start to come together and it all starts to make sense. And I think that once things start making sense, then you don't feel like there's something wrong with you.
Speaker 2:Yes, you understand the why, why, why this happened, why you know and, yeah, I can totally relate with that. It's understanding the why part, or how it happened or how you got to where you are. Yeah, it's having that revealed. That in itself brings, like this, freedom from, like you're not chained to it anymore. And then to develop the skill set and keep you know, improving and keep putting the effort to learn new skills of how to deal with old ones, their old ones, it's even more so. Do you think that you find that people struggle with wanting to make the changes or wanting to do the work because they're fearful of what they're going to find out or what they may uncover?
Speaker 1:I think the fear of you starting to remember the things that you went through, either either as a child, a teenager or as an adult, that you start peeling away at those memories and thoughts.
Speaker 1:I think it's hard. I think it's hard for people to get into that space, because I know that that's one of the things that was really hard for me. I didn't want to identify myself with what I went through, yeah, and I thought that if I unveiled that, then I was going to be identifying myself with that and I didn't want to. But, on the contrary, once I started unveiling some parts of my abuse that I've been through I didn't want to I started realizing that I'm not that person, and so that was the beauty of it. That was like I was so afraid that I was going to become a person of my past. But the more I worked on myself and the more I started seeing the things that happened to me, the more I started telling myself I'm like, I'm not that person and I need to create for myself my own personal beliefs, because if I don't change them and I keep living in my past, then I'm going to keep attracting the people that hurt me in my past, and I don't want that anymore. I was like I don't want that. I'm so much better than being in a constant state of pain, and the only one that could change that was me.
Speaker 1:But I had to go through that darkness and it wasn't easy. I had some moments of crying by myself, just like not knowing what to do. I would just be laying there like in a fetal position and just hugging myself and telling myself I'm going to be okay. I'm going to be okay and it's been a year of healing. I'm not that person. It was a year ago.
Speaker 1:But, as you know, it's a process and this journey is a journey of life. It never ends, you know. You just learn about yourself every day more and more and more how beautiful you are as a person. You know, and you start identifying yourself less and less with what happened to you. And I think that once people start acknowledging that it's okay to cry, that it's okay to feel that, and once you start feeling that, that you start losing connection with it, and then all the beautiful things that start coming in alignment with you, once you start losing connection with it, then that's when the people start saying I'm glad that I went through this phase, but you're not going to get to that phase until you face the hardest parts of the journey, you know, and so I think that's what holds people back is the state of fear.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely. And the crying part, I mean that's actually healthy. It's a release of emotions, it's a release of pain. That's why, like you say, you're having like a really crappy day and you know the final straw, you drop your coffee and the coffee cup breaks into a million. Then you just break down and cry and then think about how you feel better 30 seconds later, after, probably after you've cleaned the coffee up, and you're like, oh my god, I needed that cry. It's like you've got those emotions released and then you can kind of get a perspective, or a better perspective about like okay, let's take things one thing at a time. But yeah, crying is healthy, tears are, emotion coming out.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, and I think that's the beauty of it, Like, like, right now I'm just getting teary just thinking about it, because I've come so far with it and I just I keep telling myself it's been a year of hard work and it started the first day that I chose myself and I want to know what was your awakening moment where you decided it's about time to choose myself.
Speaker 2:I had a couple different times of revelations, you know, because emotions and how things they're stacked, they come in layers and you know you have this healing process and then you know there's another layer to it. I would say the very first one was we, the first session I ever had with my life coach. At the time I did the one. That one was not virtual, it was in person because at the time we were, you know, living in California and it was he was only like two hours away. So he had us do this exercise where Eric and I stood in opposite corners of the room and he would ask a question and then we would give an answer and one of us would take a step closer and towards each other, you know. So it was about. The exercise was all about coming together and meeting together in the middle, um, and I remember looking across the room and seeing Eric's eyes were just filled with tears. And I remember looking across the room and seeing Eric's eyes were just filled with tears and I remember going okay, I see how much this man loves me. Like I have got to get my shit figured out Like I have. I don't know how I'm going to do it, I don't even know where to start, but I know I've got to get my issues with my trust, I've got to get my issues with my insecurities and my lack of confidence. I've got to get that stuff figured out and get to the bottom of it because it's I'm going to lose this guy. And he was the first guy that I had looked at since. You know, way before my divorce, that I'm like I could marry this man. I mean, he's just unbelievable. So that was one of the most significant experiences, you know revelations for me that I needed to make some changes, you know.
Speaker 2:Then I remember he and I get into a really big argument. It was after we were married and you know we weren't speaking. It was a couple of days and we're just, like you know, not really talking to each other. And I remember I couldn't sleep. So I went downstairs it was like two in the morning and I sat on the couch and I'm like, okay, what do I have in this? What am I causing? What am I at fault for? That's causing these issues.
Speaker 2:And I finally realized like I am bringing certain things into it that are causing pain, that are my own defense mechanisms that I was, that was drilled into me as a kid, like I said, you know, not distrusting or the world's just out to screw you, kind of a thing that was, and I was carrying that and had brought that into the marriage, and I had that revelation that this is a lot of this is on me and by no means is anybody perfect. You know, we all have our stuff, but it was me resisting, recognizing my own faults and flaws, because it hurts and to take ownership and accountability of your own stuff and the pain you're causing to people you love. It does it, it. It hurts, it deflates the ego, so to speak. You know, and that's to be able to go. Okay, I, I gotta, I gotta fix my stuff you know this otherwise this marriage is not gonna last, you know.
Speaker 2:And then now I mean it we love each other more and more every day. I mean I never thought where our marriage is today. I couldn't have dreamed it would be this good years ago. And that it's all, because it's not because we bury things, it's because we talk them out, and I'll post about talking about, like, the delivery of things and how you say it to somebody. You could look at your spouse and go, you know what. That was really crappy thing to say. That really hurt. That's probably not going to land very well on them. They're going to get defensive, you know where, if you, where, if you're like honey darling, that really hurt my feelings, it's going to be a totally different response and reaction from them and because you're not being defensive towards it exactly.
Speaker 2:But as a kid being or, I grew up being told that you don't kiss anybody's ass. So that's not ass kissing, it's learning how to talk to somebody nicely and deliver it properly. It's not sucking up to the person. But there again, that was the old belief system in my head. You know that I had gotten from growing up At least you know that was a message I got was you don't do that. So it's. But that's what I mean by layers. Like you know, it's so many different things that you know from like child and most of it, like you know, most of it comes from childhood.
Speaker 2:Like seven to twelve years old is when we get have so much impact as far as our, and we even as parents, didn't realize the impact that we had on our children, and that's it's like until you start doing the work, you don't realize the impact that you were having on your kids, and that's why I am such a big advocate of breaking the generational cycle For my grandkids and my kids, it's never been that.
Speaker 1:It's not, Because look at your 17-year-old she acknowledges and she said thank you, mom, for taking accountability. It meant a lot to me and I'm sure that that meant so much for you, and I think it's important for people to understand that just a simple action of you saying I'm sorry, I acknowledge that I did this, this and this not an empty I'm sorry. Why are you sorry? And taking accountability for what you did, it doesn't mean that you're below them or they're above you. It has nothing to do with that. It has to do that you're connecting with the person that you love and acknowledging that your actions hurt them and you didn't intentionally want to hurt them, but they let you know that. So now it's for you to take action and say Okay, I'm sorry that I caused this pain, I am sorry that I hurt you. How can we make it better together?
Speaker 2:Yeah, and you know who else that will benefit from that in me role modeling that kind of behavior with her, her future husband and her, because she's learning accountability through me, and I mean what a blessing as a parent to be able to show your kids that, and then it creates a healthier belief system for their children too.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's a beautiful cycle, Because I always tell my daughter. Now, you know, it's something that I don't think my mom ever thought of telling me. I guess she just thought like, oh, my daughter will be fine, but it's because nobody told her and so she didn't tell me. But one of the things that I've learned is I always tell my kids, I praise them for the smallest things that they do, not for only the big things that they do, and I acknowledge that I love them for their individuality, and I always tell them I will always want you to be who you are meant to be.
Speaker 1:I don't want you to ever feel that you need to change for anybody, regardless of who they are. People need to accept you for who you are, because you bring value to this world by being your unique self, and I always tell them you are worthy of receiving love, respect, and for somebody to always be honest with you. As soon as you don't feel that, then you need to step back and ask yourself the question why? But I don't, ever, ever want you to let anybody ever make you feel that you're less worthy of what you deserve in this world.
Speaker 2:You know what? Because a lot of parents give love based off of performance, that like, oh, you get good grades, all your forward with love and you know all the. You know what's the right word, not appreciation, but proud of them. For, like I said, good grades or you know, you did great in your soccer game, you know? And then to show and give love through performance has the kid thinking like well, if I don't perform, then am I still worthy to be loved?
Speaker 1:and that can get carried into adulthood too now I can and I was reading in this book it was it's called the radical awakening. I was reading in this book it was it's called the radical awakening and one of the things that she talks about is how, when you become a parent, especially when you become a mother, you start identifying yourself with your children and you lose your own identity. And so what happens is that now your children become a reflection of you. Instead of you letting them become their own person, you start identifying with your children. So therefore, if your children don't get good grades, that's a reflection of you. If your children are not good athletes, that's a reflection of you. Whatever it is that your children may not be good at, because that's not what they choose in life. School's not for everybody. Just because you're not an athlete does not mean that you're not good at other things you know. And so now you start living what they say vicariously through your children and you don't let your children become who they're supposed to be. Maybe they don't want to do sports, maybe they don't want to join that club, you know, maybe school isn't just really the thing for them. So it's important for us not to lose who we are as parents, without not only identifying as a mother but as a person, as a woman, and let our children learn to live who they're supposed to be in this world.
Speaker 1:And so I am so at fault for it, because I wanted my son to go to college and I pushed it and pushed it and pushed it. I wanted him to be the best football player and I put him in every program you could imagine for him. He did training, he woke up early, he went to sleep late. It was like breathing football day in and day out. I pushed it on him and my fear was failure. I didn't want him to struggle in life. I didn't want him to know what it was to fail. Yeah, sorry, I'm emotional, but in return I actually was taking away from my son what he wanted to enjoy in those years of his life. And so now I could probably say my son is not a football player. Does he love and enjoy football? Yes, but I may have taken some of that joy away from him by pushing him as much as I did that joy away from him by pushing him as much as I did.
Speaker 1:Did he finish high school? No. Is he extremely smart? Yes. Did he go to college? No, and he did everything I was programming him to do. And when he finally stood up for himself and said I'm not going to do it, and of course I became resistant with him, I created a negative relationship. But as I grew up with him, I started then accepting him for who he is and I started them saying he doesn't have to go to school. If he chooses to go to college, it will be his choice, not my choice. It's not for anybody to say that you have to do this to become this person. And so now he's following his own passion, and now I'm supporting him through the passion that he has, and I'm so proud of him because he's doing what he loves to do and he's going against all norms, and I'm proud of him for that. So now I've learned a lot through him.
Speaker 1:To for my daughter, where I'm like Okay, what is it that you want to study? I don't know. Okay, you don't have to know. I just want you to be happy with what you do. You know, and that's all that matters to me is your happiness that whatever you do creates happiness within yourself, and so I had to learn through what I did, and to now know that I can't take that back, but I could learn from it, and so that's what I've been doing as a parent and as a person. I've learned a lot from my actions, and I know that that came from me not wanting my kids to know what it was not to have what it was to know not to fail.
Speaker 1:You know for society to see them different. You know I don't want them to feel that. And then in return, I was like this was all about me and what I felt about me, and that's what I was instilling in them, and so I said not again. Yeah, and that was so beautiful, because now I project the love that I'm feeling for myself to them now.
Speaker 2:And you're allowing them to shine in their own way, and it's so common, so many of us parents we do it to. Either we're projecting our own stuff onto them or we're trying to protect them, like you said, from failing. But what we're not realizing as parents is that we could possibly be squashing their or what they truly are meant to be. But you know what, like you said, you've recognized it, you've changed it and now he is shining in his way and you're allowing you know the same thing with your daughter. And that's what it's all about, you know, because we do the best we can as parents and that you put in the continued work and you continue to improve, I mean that will allow for your kids to be truly happy and grow up as happy adults, and then they do shine because they're happy, you know.
Speaker 1:So no, you know, so no, it's so beautiful, cause then they start sharing their stories with you and they start becoming safe with you. Exactly, and that's so important is that because now you feel safe within yourself, you start instilling that safety within them. So now they start feeling safe with you and they want to share everything with you. And it's like it feels so beautiful because I'm like they're their own person and they're sharing what they're doing with me, you know, and it's like it's so nice because you start role modeling. What you want your kids to lives to be, you know what you want them to build for themselves. Yeah, and that was the hardest part, is because of what we were feeling. And so, yeah, you, you've made that a huge difference to. You know, you decided to do like your content. When did you decide to do that content and say you know what? I'm going to be open, I'm going to create this for the world, because it's about time that people know they're not alone.
Speaker 2:Probably really with the body dysmorphia and the eating I'd say about the eating disorder about a year ago. You know I've always tried to be motivating and empowering and inspiring and, you know, believing in yourself, I'd say the last, you know, three or four years, but really taking it up to even more vulnerability, being more transparent. You know, because, especially the eating disorder growing up, that was very shamed and very, very quiet, I mean, other than my parents and my sisters. Nobody knew and if somebody did know outside of them it's because they caught me doing it or saw something that gave it away kind of a thing. But yeah, so it was because it was.
Speaker 2:I felt so shamed by it and I was ashamed. I didn't share that piece for a long time. I was embarrassed and, you know, thought that you know, like what the heck are people? People are going to think what the heck is wrong with that girl, that she does that, you know, but not recognizing that one, that there's a lot of women that suffer from it you know, and that we all have our stuff and our ways, our, our deep secrets, or, you know, our deep rooted pain that we're doing, we're trying to repress somehow.
Speaker 1:So I think you've made me aware to the point where I never saw like an eating disorder as a way of an addiction and as a way of people masking their true feelings about how they felt, you know. So now it's like I'm going to be more conscientious when it comes to food with my friends and stuff. You know, in in the words that you say like, oh, I see you eat a lot but you don't seem to gain any weight. You know it's like, and now it's it opens up your eyes to start thinking of wait, maybe there's a reason why, maybe there's a deeper reason why and I think we tend to not focus so much on the things that could affect others by the things that we say that seems so simple, by the things that we say that seems so simple. And so I'm going to be more conscious of being more sensitive to that, because it's best just not to say anything unless somebody opens up to you about it. You know, especially when it comes to an eating disorder, because it's such a sensitive subject to be able to talk about and it's usually because somebody's going through something so deep.
Speaker 1:I had a roommate and I remember hearing her and that's the only reason why I knew because I would see her eat and then she would run away. I would see her eat and run away and I was very naive. I was like, what, what's going on? So one day I followed her and I was like maybe she's just not feeling well, let me go see how she's doing. And then I noticed that, you know, she was inducing herself to vomit and I was like, okay, we need to talk, I need to show her that I've noticed, if she needs to talk to anybody, I'm here for her, like she doesn't need to feel alone.
Speaker 1:You know, it's her first year in college. We don't know anybody. I know I surely didn't know anybody, and I'm sure she felt the same way. You know, lost, scared. She's going through a lot more stress now, and so we were able to talk about it and stuff. And it made a huge difference to her knowing that she didn't feel alone because she was able to talk to somebody without not being judged. And I think that's the first thing that people need to understand is, if you're going to listen, then you need to not place your bias and judgment on anybody. You know, the biggest thing that you would say has been so empowering for you during this transformational journey of yours, oh good question.
Speaker 2:Probably the the most powerful thing for me was and, like I said, I went through, I've gone with the eating disorder where it would be active and then non-active, you know, I mean I would still be'm not doing it, or when I wouldn't do it, and I had to really recognize and really dig deep inside me to put that connection together, to make that connection and realize there is a correlation. There absolutely is a correlation. When I'm doing the eating disorder, on days that I'm doing it and arguing with Eric or my lack of confidence, or looking in the mirror and body shaming myself, on those days that the eating in the binging and purging was active, that was like heightened, heightened. So when I was able to make that connection there, I realized like, okay, this it will be. So I will be so much happier when I can be totally free from it. You know ends with any like an addiction.
Speaker 2:Does it cross my mind sometimes? Yes, I'm very aware of when I'm like, wanting to, like, oh my god, I want to eat everything in sight. Because typically I'm a very controlled person. You could put 20 donuts in front of me and I won't touch them. But if I'm in an emotional state where everything is like I'm in survival mode or fight or flight mode, then that it's. I'm going to want to have that desire to eat all the donuts and then induce vomiting, you know. But I'm able to recognize okay, why am I in survival mode, like if I'm wanting to eat and eat. I know that somewhere I have been triggered and that's where I'll go sit down. Sometimes I'll journal, like, and I'll write out you know, this day sucks or I'm angry about this or I'm so stressed about that, and then I'll figure out what's triggering me and I'm like, okay, and then the whole eating thing disappears.
Speaker 2:But it's taken a lot of years of, like I said, putting in the work and realizing developing new strategies. Now is one of them. Working out is extremely therapeutic for me. So I have to, or I've chosen to, develop strategies rather than the binging and purging both therapeutic strategies and comfort things that bring comfort to me and journaling. And you know, sitting, sitting at something simple like sitting outside getting some sunlight and drinking my coffee, you know going on a walk is comforting for me. You know you just find those different things to replace negative emotions and the negative strategies. It's kind of like for weight loss. You know, you replace your Coke, which is loaded with sugar, with a healthier drink. Either it's lemon water or, you know, zero calorie iced tea. You know, it's all about replacing a bad habit with a good, and that's really what it is.
Speaker 1:It's just our strategies and they can be broken, you know you got to change your belief system, which is where we come in, you know, absolutely, yeah, no, that's, that's so well said. It's because we have to change the way we respond to things. So, for me, I love journaling. I, if I feel an emotion and I can't quite understand it or what I'm going through at that moment, I'll sit down and I'll start reflecting and writing down. And I think, through reflection, you start becoming more aware of everything that's happening, where before I would just kind of sit in that emotion and ignore it, and with time it just kept fustering inside and I just kept feeding it negativity, right, so it kept growing even more and more and more until I exploded. And so now, instead of doing that, I I actually like, as soon as I start feeling something, with whoever it is, either I'll tell you hey, that wasn't really kind. Or you know, one thing that we tend to lack a lot of is boundaries for ourselves, you know, and I would say hey, like you're, totally like, that's not part of my boundary, you just disrespected my boundary and this is why. And so I started doing that with myself. Whenever I like, cross my own boundaries and I don't respect my boundaries, I start journaling and writing down why did I just do that? You know, and that's what's important to do is you start reflecting on why you feel the way you feel, instead of ignoring why you feel the way you feel, instead of ignoring why you feel the way you feel, anything. As long as we all start doing that, then we'll be less reactive to things and we will start responding in a more healthier way, creating more positive connection within us people, instead of that like, oh, it's me Like, you just did that to me. No, no, no, like we need to stop taking things so personal. When somebody says something, yes, it did affect you, yes, it did bother you. Now let's see how we could change that into something positive.
Speaker 1:You know, instead of sitting in and saying, well, like you said the way you say it, you just did this, instead of saying, okay, I acknowledge you felt that way, you did this, can we sit down and talk about it? If you don't want to talk about it right now, can we just give each other five minutes and come back and talk to it about it? Because it's important that we kind of reflect on what we just said to each other, how we feel about each other, so we could acknowledge one another, and so I love connecting with you. We're like friends from afar no, instantly, like we just clicked, like immediately and I think that's the beauty of healing is you start connecting with such beautiful people that have the same energy as you. Yeah, you know, you start healing, you start going through your journey of life and you start automatically just attracting that into your life, because that's the way you start creating worth is by creating it for yourself. Yeah, absolutely, that's the way you start creating worth is by creating it for yourself.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely. And you start seeing the value and worth in other people too. Yes, that you feed off of that. Yeah, it becomes this beautiful connection between the two of you.
Speaker 1:I see the value you bring into my life. Thank you Likewise. Yeah, so, and that's something that I appreciate where before I think we failed to do that, you know, cause we were so much in our space, that now, yeah, so now it's like I see what you bring and I value it and I make sure to tell you, you know, I don't just hold it to myself, because people need to know how you make them feel it's important.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I agree, and that's part of vulnerability Letting someone know, you know, and sometimes that can be challenging.
Speaker 1:I think that that's something that a lot of us have to still work on, even through our healing journey, because we start creating these big walls in front of us and we don't want to let people in with the fear of becoming vulnerable with the wrong person again. But I think that's the journey of learning, you know, and so once you become in a better space, you're going to be more intuitive and you're going to listen to your body more, so you're not going to put yourself in situations that are unhealthy because now you're going to know it's okay to walk away.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Beautifully said yeah, I totally agree. Beautifully said yeah, I totally agree.
Speaker 1:Well, thank you so much for coming on this podcast. Thank you for having me. I'm so happy that you came on here and were so open and felt safe, because I know you're going to make such a huge difference to others, thank you. Thank you for taking your time and connecting with me on this beautiful journey of life. Please subscribe and review, and don't forget to follow so you don't miss out on any of these amazing and empowering episodes. Always remember you matter. If nobody has told you today, I am here to tell you that you are enough, you are worthy and you are deserving of the best. Every day that you wake up, I want you to take one moment and just look at yourself in the mirror and know that the person staring back at you is so proud of you and loves you beyond measures. You are a true warrior.