Self-Worth Revolution: Tips for your Transformational Journey

Healing from Trauma: Building Self-Worth and Empowerment with Vivian Medrano

• Vivian Medrano • Season 2 • Episode 22

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What if you could transform your trauma into a source of strength and self-worth? Join me on the Self-Worth Revolution Podcast, where I share my intimate journey of healing from childhood trauma and breaking free from toxic relationships. By shifting our perspective from 'Why?' to 'What?', we gain powerful insights that help us overcome the conditioning that taught us to accept unhealthy behaviors and equate love with self-sacrifice. This episode will encourage you to confront deep-seated pain, understand the impact of unhealed trauma, and find the courage to embark on a path of healing.

In this transformative episode, you'll discover the importance of self-love and setting boundaries as key components in creating a life filled with joy, abundance, and healthy relationships. I discuss my personal experiences of growing up with abuse and how it led to a pattern of attracting toxic relationships. Through vulnerability and empowerment, I found the strength to leave harmful situations and align with my higher self. Join us as we navigate life's challenges together, turning them into lessons that shape our stories, and remind us of our inherent worth and strength. Subscribe, review, and follow to stay connected with these uplifting episodes and continue your empowering journey.

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Disclaimer:
The "The Self Worth Revolution" Podcast may, at times, cover sensitive topics including but not limited to suicide, abuse, violence, severe mental illnesses, sex, drugs, alcohol addiction, psychedelics and the use of plant medicines. You are advised to refrain from watching or listening to the Podcast if you are likely to be offended or adversely impacted by any of these topics. Neither The Company, The Host nor the guests shall at any time be liable for the content covered causing off...

Speaker 1:

Why, why, why?

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What I started to understand was I was asking the wrong question, and the question I was not supposed to be asking was why it was what? What happened to me? What did I go through in order for me to start accepting certain behaviors, certain actions from people? What did I go through as a child that predisposed me to be programmed to believe that love meant you doing what everybody else wanted? You've been able to something, something that made you uncomfortable. Why didn't you speak up for yourself when you knew you had to speak up for yourself? Why was it hard for you to stand up for yourself and say no? Welcome to the Self-Worth Revolution Podcast hosted by Vivian Medrano. I am not only a podcaster, but a mother, a nurse, a life coach and a survivor. This podcast is about turning your pain into your power, your experiences into your lessons, and to start living a life full of abundance, inner peace and fulfillment. My higher purpose is for my listeners to find their self-worth and their value by following their path to greatness. We are all deserving of living our best lives. It is time to stop identifying with our past. Start living in the present for a better future. This podcast will have guest speakers that will share their stories of how they transformed their lives and found their worth. My mission is to let my listeners know this is your time to shine, to know that you are not alone. Healing is empowering. It takes courage to be vulnerable, and our voices have power. To be vulnerable and our voices have power. Hold on to your lives, because this will be an incredible ride of self-transformation, self-empowerment and radical change. It is time for us to take our power back. Hi, a little bit about me and why it was. Kind of. The question I was always asking myself was why. As you know, as children, we're always asking why this happened. Why does that work that way? Why are you doing that? Right? The word why is always something that comes up. So to me it was. Why was the things happening to me? Why were people treating me the way that they were? Why were people being so unkind and unloving? Why, why, why? What I started to understand was I was asking the wrong question, and the question I was not supposed to be asking was why it was what. What happened to me? What did I go through in order for me to start accepting certain behaviors, certain actions from people? What did I go through as a child that predisposed me to be programmed to believe that love meant you doing what everybody else wanted you to do, even if it was something that made you uncomfortable. Why didn't you speak up for yourself when you knew you had to speak up for doing what everybody else wanted you to do, even if it was something that made you uncomfortable? Why didn't you speak up for yourself when you knew you had to speak up for yourself? Why was it hard for you to stand up for yourself and say no? And you always said yes when you knew yes was not what you wanted to say.

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And so when I started to figure out on what happened to me and so when I started to figure out on what happened to me was when the light kind of okay, vivian, now you're going to have to get down to the nitty gritty of what happened to you and are you ready for this? And the reality of it is that for years I wasn't ready for it. I wasn't ready to face what happened to me, and because I wasn't ready to face what happened to me, for a long time I was attracting people narcissistic, toxic, unhealed into my life Because I was unhealed, into my life because I was unhealed. I had never, ever wanted to face my trauma. I thought if I suppressed my trauma, if I left my trauma alone, if I never mentioned what happened to me, if I pretended that it didn't happen to me, that it would just vanish, it would just go away. But as I was suppressing this trauma that I went through, I was just creating more unhealed versions of myself within me and, little by little, I was attracting what was not healthy for me, because that's what I was programmed to believe that I was worthy of.

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And not until I started realizing that it was not the kind of love that I wanted for myself, that I was not worthy of that kind of love, that I was worthy of respect. I was worthy of somebody being loyal to me. I was worthy of being able to speak and feel safe and know that I wasn't going to be mistreated. I was choosing not to heal. I was choosing to make excuses. I was choosing to blame other people on why I wasn't healing.

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Well, I'm not here to make excuses anymore. I'm not here to say I don't want to heal. I'm here to tell you that it's really hard to make that decision, and making that decision means you have to be brave enough to know that you're going to face your deepest, deepest pain and trauma. And it's hard Because our mind has a way of blocking it, blocks it away to protect you. So it's still there, it's floating around and you unconsciously feel this way and that's why you make excuses to your family and friends and say they truly do love me, when inside of you, your body is saying no, they don't, they don't respect you, they don't value you. But you don't want to believe that. See, you don't want to believe that because all these years of growing up you believed that this was what love was.

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And the hardest step to take is start working on yourself and say I'm pretty messed up inside, I got a lot of shit inside. I got a lot of shit inside. I Fucking don't know what to do. I'm hurting, I'm crying. I feel so alone. I feel like the world is crumbling down on me and I don't know what to do. And I had to get out of it. And that's how I felt for a long time. I felt like how am I going to face my inner demons, how am I going to face the trauma that I went through? How? I had no idea, because it's scary. It's so scary to face the things that you know have hurt you so much that you just want to forget about it, forgetting about it, because it's still going to be there. So you have to learn how to live with it, but you have to learn how to live with it in a way that it's healthy for you. So I am a survivor.

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I was abused Just not yet, but it was an awful way to grow up and I don't remember a lot of my childhood Because your mind has a way of protecting you by blocking the good from the bad. So I have very, very limited memories of me growing up as a child and I wish I could tell you that I remember my mom hugging me and my mom kissing me. I can't, and I can't because the one person who hurt me the most was myself. He was connected to my mom, and so my mind has blocked out a lot of great memories that I'm sure I had with my mom to protect me from those memories that I don't want to remember with him. So I'm not here to tell you that the journey of healing and growing into your better version of yourself is easy, because I would be lying to you and I'm not going to sit here and lie to you and tell you it's easy, but what I could tell you is that it's worth it.

Speaker 1:

See, as an adult I kept attracting narcissistic and the last person I dated for two years was, let's just say, a reflection of how I grew up and I couldn't understand. But now I get it. I get it so fully. I had to go through that relationship to understand that I was going to keep attracting that into my life until I learned to heal and until I learned to work and love myself. You see, in order for you to attract the person that you're worthy of, you have to create that person for yourself. You have to love yourself the way that you want somebody else to love you. You have to know you're worthy enough so that when somebody comes into your life they're going to recognize that worth. You are the one that teaches people how it's okay to treat you. So the more that you forgive people for lying, for cheating, for being disrespectful, abusive towards you, it's the more that you're allowing them and letting them.

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Okay, you're not intentionally doing it, but it's time to change that. It's time for you to start living the life that you're so worthy of living, it's time for you to choose yourself. And if that means leaving somebody who you think you love but who makes you feel so unsafe, makes you feel so unworthy, so unloved, when you lay down next to them, you feel so lonely, you feel like nobody. Is that the way you want to feel? Is that the way you want to wake up and feel like emptiness inside of you? Because it's an awful feeling to have? I know that, and I'm just here to tell you that you don't have to live that way. Yes, you're going to have to be brave, which you are, and yes, you're going to be strong, which you are, and you're just going to have to say fuck the old life, it's time for a new me.

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Now, are you ready for that new me? Are you ready for that new me? It's going to bring you happiness, joy, abundance. You're going to attract greatness to yourself. Are you ready?

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I know I was and I am, and there is nothing. I will change Nothing, not even my struggles, not even my pain, because those happened for me for a reason, and I understand that now. I understand that I had to go through that pain as a child. I had to go through that pain with my relationship. If I didn't go through that, I wouldn't understand the value of life or how worthy life is. It took me a long time, but I am here now and I wouldn't change it for anything. I'm strong because of what I went through and I'm so proud of me. I am so proud of me and I know you could do it, and I'm here to tell you that you could do it. You define yourself and no matter how low you feel right now I know it's horrible, but I know you can do it.

Speaker 1:

So if you're ready to live a life full of abundance, of happiness, of joy, of love, of aligning with your higher self, then connect with me, follow me, because this journey, this podcast, it's just that. It's a journey, and it's a journey of self-worth, of evolving into the person that you're intended to be, the person you're deserving of being, and nothing less. So come join me. It's going to be a bumpy ride, but I promise towards the end the bumps are just going to get smaller and smaller, but you may just want a little bit of bumpiness along the way, because those are our lessons in life.

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We all have our own stories and our stories matter and you matter. Don't you ever forget that. Thank you for taking your time and connecting with me on this beautiful journey of life. Please subscribe and review, and don't forget to follow so you don't miss out on any of these amazing and empowering episodes. Always remember you matter. If nobody has told you today, I am here to tell you that you are enough, you are worthy and you are deserving of the best. Every day that you wake up, I want you to take one moment and just look at yourself in the mirror and know that the person staring back at you is so proud of you and loves you beyond measures. You are a true warrior.