Created to Be
The Created to Be podcast is hosted by Bethany Pigott, Justin Pigott, Darius Brown, and Brandi Morgan. Episodes incorporate what’s happening in FCA at Mississippi State, fun and lighthearted conversations that help you get to know the hosts and their guests, and real-life topics and themes being discussed with coaches and athletes.
Created to Be
Formation, Awareness, and Becoming
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In this episode of the Created to Be Podcast, the team explores the question: Who or what is shaping you? Through honest stories of failure, disappointment, people-pleasing, loss of platform, and unmet expectations, the conversation unpacks how the process of formation in the life of the believer reveals what’s already inside us. Rather than avoiding discomfort, they discuss how God uses it to bring awareness, refine posture, and form us into who He’s already shaped us to be. This episode invites athletes and leaders alike to stop striving, start noticing, and trust the God who is faithful to complete His work.
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If you don't have God's perspective on something, it's gonna be very hard to be aware because there's so many different you know factors or inputs of what you're aware, like who's telling you to be aware of what? That goes back to that question who or what is shaping you. Welcome to the Created to be podcast. We're back for another week. As Darius said at the end of the last episode, we'll see you here again, same place, same time. So here we are. Justin.
Speaker 2:Yep, here we are.
Speaker 4:Yo, are you here with us today?
Speaker 2:I am here. I am here.
Speaker 4:We're in the middle of college getaway preparation. So praise God. A lot, a lot going on. Uh Doc's with us today. What's going on? I'm back. And Brandy. Hey. Um, so we are like I've said many times, we record on Thursdays and it comes out on Tuesdays. And the goal, you know, the great thing about this podcast is that we can kind of tailor it to the time of year we're at and things like that, and we will do our best to do that. So the ideal situation would be that we record on the topic we're speaking at at the huddle, and then the podcast comes out on Tuesday. You get a little extended um time talking about and discussing, listening to this topic, but we have weather coming our way. So this might be the huddle right here. It's the message. We'll see. Wow. Oh, wow. Wow. Uh so last podcast, it was we had a lot of fun talking about the 2026 trend, about it being the new 2016, something like that. I say the wrong thing every time. Um and then who you are becoming as our theme overall. So, really, today is gonna be a little bit different because we're really gonna just sit on the introduction of that. Um, so anyway, we're gonna talk about formation, what that is. That's kind of I don't know if that's become kind of a buzzword. I feel like it has, you know, like there's different things that kind of come through discipleship and churches at different times. And I feel like several years ago I was talking about presence and encounter. Like I felt and then I started learning more about spiritual formation, and like now I hear that word. There was only specific spaces I would hear that phrase in. And now I feel like it's becoming more of something like people throw that word around more. I don't know if y'all have heard that, like formation. Uh, and so I don't know that we're gonna figure it out today, but we're gonna talk about it and hopefully put a little bit more meat on on like what that is or what we think it is, and kind of, you know, talk about it. Um, okay, updates, college getaway. We can talk about it one more time because this will come out the week that we go to College Getaway.
Speaker 2:Yeah. I mean, we got a good group. We're excited about it. Um, great speakers, great lineup. The worship teams, worship teams, rep in Mississippi State, rep and strong. I was gonna say questionable, but that's totally a joke. No.
Speaker 3:We've got a great worship team.
Speaker 2:I'm pumped about having Jeremiah um Cray Winston coming to share from Word of Life and in uh Jackson area. So we're thrilled to have him. And uh yeah, it's been a great time.
Speaker 4:Let's ask Darius, because Darius, you're part of the worship team, which we appreciate. I was totally joking. But what do you look forward to about this time?
Speaker:Um I look forward to just the interaction uh with the uh with the squad. With the squad. We uh last year was uh our first time doing it in that setting together. Yeah. Um as w as you know, all of us are singing, playing, because usually at the huddles it's just one, two musicians. Well, we had a whole band. So I'm looking forward to us being able to, you know, get together again. Then also I was saying the interaction with the students. Um, like it's really a vibe. Yeah it is really a vibe. Like I remember last year, uh, one time we were so hyped, my keyboard was shaking. Like I had I had to like settle myself, like, hey, you know, and so uh it's such a good time. And to get with Mr. Keith, uh he's very uh he's very well uh rounded and knowledgeable about the stuff, helps us get it together. It just was it just was a good time, you know. And so good hang. Good hang.
Speaker 2:It's just funny. Keith is funny.
Speaker 4:Now Keith, y'all might need it, you might need to say who Keith is. He's on staff.
Speaker 2:Yeah, Keith's on stack. We leave in the Delta and uh has a wild story, served um uh for a country. I don't know which branch of the military um had an accident and all that as well. Anyway, he's he's amazing. He sh shouldn't be alive, he's just a walking miracle.
Speaker 3:Right.
Speaker 2:And um it's just absolutely blast to work with. And uh sure, I mean, he's got his limitations, but man, it's like for like just on what he can do um on the physical standpoint, but man, he is like the glue to a lot of what we do, and on the tech side for a majority of these camps and what we're doing, uh helped me with like we got a new system called VIP, which y'all know about, you know, and so he's like, Man, I'll register it for you. I'm like, thank you, you know. There's some things that he's he's such a gift and he's so fun. He will crack a joke on you in a heartbeat, and you better listen because you'll miss it. Miss it. Um it's just he's the ultimate servant, thankful that he's on staff with us.
Speaker:And he seemed like he had everything. Like we will be there, we're like, well, somebody forgot this. He said, Oh, I got it. You know, it's like he's you know, um, like you said, he's such a gift. Uh, and and it was amazing because when we talked, we knew some of the same people, you know. So uh it's that's that's something I'm looking forward to as well. The relationship building piece. You know, you get to meet a lot of people, get to know a lot of the students and even staff. I met Brandy last year and her husband. I thought her husband was an actor or something. He just got an acting vibe. I know. Like he got it, he got the looks, he got the he got the looks, he got the way he carried himself. And then when I got to meet him, I'm like, oh, so you're uh the coach, you know. Uh so it's but just that piece getting together, uh like that's something that I really enjoy. So I'm excited about, you know, what's what's gonna happen this year.
Speaker 1:Okay. This is random, but who played the band? Who played the drums in the band?
Speaker:Uh it was a guy from Jackson State. Okay. Um I can't remember his name right.
Speaker 2:Tavares?
Speaker:Uh Tavares. From Jackson State. He'll be back. That's what I was going to say. He's coming back this year? Uh uh.
Speaker 2:And then we got Tiberius is gonna come back and play too. Yeah, so we got a we got a full band. Everybody plays one this year.
Speaker:And I'm telling you, like, for me, and I'll just say this, I've sang most of my life. So to actually be a part of playing and singing, and then we coming up with stuff in the moment, yeah, like that was a real experience for me. Like, I really feel like I'm a legit musician. Yeah, you are a legit musician. During college getaway. Now, as a college getaway, it's like back to normal.
Speaker 1:What's so cool to me is like it is y'all's gift, like to be spirit-led in that moment. Like if I were in a situation which I can't play or sing, but if I were, I feel like I would be like very like following this is the song that we gotta play, but y'all let the spirit lead, and you can tell it's so awesome.
Speaker:Man, we we have to, because I feel like if once for us in that space, um, it's a lot of things that's factored in. Like you said, of course, being spirit-led, but we're getting a lot of energy from the students. And then when they come in and asking you, you know, y'all saying this, are y'all singing this, or can we sing that again? And you seeing like the uh the response, that's that's very unless you're about to ask what's one song y'all are playing. Well, we got a few, but but no, I'm not gonna give you a thing. I want you to be there. I want you on your edge of your seats. I want you to be on the edge of your seats for everything. It's gonna be amazing.
Speaker 1:I almost text Matthew and said, Will y'all please play God? I'm just great.
Speaker:Hey.
Speaker 2:All I'm gonna say is we do a new one. We threw a new one after their last year.
Speaker 4:No, I I'm I'm sitting over here waiting on an opportunity to add a great song. We need to bring that back, maybe serious about stories because what like first of all, we did a skit and you learned a song. Yes. And we were really nervous because you were like tired and you're like, I don't know if I want to do this. And then I'm like trying to remember.
Speaker:We should have It's decline.
Speaker 3:Right, right.
Speaker 1:I have it on video. Give us a little bit. I can play it in the mic. I can play it in the mic later for you.
Speaker:I forgot it. Oh, okay. Like, because you remember, I was trying to remember, see, I didn't know it. So I have why not as big as kids. Now, this is a real story. Y'all know what happened. I don't know if I told y'all. So they put this on me to do, and I'm scared because I don't know the song, so I'm trying to learn it. Literally, so nervous. I sat in a uh, I had my water bottle in my seat and didn't realize, like I'm just going in and out because I'm trying to say, are we next? Come in and sit down, and the water bottles spill. And I get water all on my pants. I did not know that. Now I'm in the bathroom. No, I didn't tell nobody. So now I'm in the bathroom trying to drive off. And the only thing that helped me was my paint. I had on dark black jeans. So it's not as noticeable. And the lights were low. And the lights were low. So I'm, but when I tell you, I was so mad, scared, embarrassed all at once. So that's a kind of getaway story that y'all didn't hear. It was great.
Speaker 4:Yeah, that's well, also, like I would just watch you guys, and just because I know y'all, I would see so much communication happening.
Speaker 2:High communication.
Speaker 4:Yeah, but and also just like, but I was I was thinking, this is incredible because everybody probably had no idea what was like what y'all were navigating up there. I mean, it was a lot. And did you learn, you you played some new songs, but did you know them beforehand? Or you learn them on your side?
Speaker:I will say this. I don't ever know the college getaway list at all. Like, I may be familiar with a song like lyrics, but actually knowing the songs, so I don't. So a lot of times I'm having to learn them uh on my way, I'm listening on my way. Uh sometimes listening when we're there, like if we if we know the set, because Jeremiah does, I want to say that he has done a he does a fantastic job with the set. Matt does a great job with making sure that I with the keys. So it's a lot of that I'm in the moment we're learning. And and then that's where you was talking about the the creative piece, because sometimes once we know where we're going, we can start adding things and add limbs and do music or whatever that doesn't take away from the song, but adds to it. And then better than it, she notices everything. There's I saw when you looked at, or and I'm like, it's amazing because most people don't know it. That much too. Like I was that time like evaluating y'all. But it didn't happen. But it's a it's a part of it, it's almost like a communicative form without speaking. You know, it's looking at each other, eye contact. Uh, because it was like that for kind of getaway, and then I'm gonna just tell y'all this. It went up another notch in Bellhaven. That's right. Y'all didn't hear him. It went up a like because we we jailed. Yeah. You know, we got we kind of in sync. We know we kind of have learned each other. And so it's it is I know it's gonna be, I'm telling you, it's gonna be bananas. I'm telling you, it's gonna be crazy.
Speaker 4:I just love watching people do this this year, you guys. People that have never heard Darius sing. Just that was me last year. Brett looks at me and he's like, Like, he can sing. You just you're like, John Legend has come to college anyway.
Speaker 2:Great. I forget what song it was, but uh Jeremiah did the first verse and did a great job, and then like Darius came in on the second. Everybody went, Huh?
Speaker 4:Like, where'd that come from? He's playing the P and the keyboard, and or what were you playing? TV games over there. And then just like belted out of like, Yeah, you see what's happening here, people.
Speaker 2:Stevie Wonder over there, man.
Speaker 4:Yeah. Um Doc Brown, Doc Brown, his own. You're you're your own. But yeah, you do uh, you know, you have a unique sound. So I'm glad people get to hear that. And yeah, Jeremiah does a great job. I was so impressed with how he and I know that you said at camp it went up another level. We weren't there, but just watching him at the college getaway, that's definitely like his space to engage with the crowd, lead the crowd, lead the band, like uh facilitate all that. That's a lot. Like that's what I think that I talked to Shay about some was just watching him move things around, but he's still singing, he's still prompting the crowd, like he's still doing all that, but he's for a guy that can't read music either.
Speaker 2:He's taught himself.
Speaker 4:Yeah, that's crazy.
Speaker:That's me and him both. Oh, really? Oh, that's me. Yes. I do I I'll say this with me playing a keyboard, that's why like most of the time Jeremiah's playing the main, unless he's singing out front, and I'll play main. But um, the reason why I'm able to do the ad libs and the different sounds was because I learned how to play the keyboard literally through prayer. I couldn't play. I was going to my wife's church. They didn't have a keyboard player, and I wanted to help the church. I just wanted to help. I knew I had to give them music, and so uh my wife got me a keyboard and I would sit in there and pray and I'd be like, Lord, just help me. And literally, before I would pray, I would uh play something, and it literally took a life of its own. So it's a for me, it's very uh a spiritual connection. Yeah, you know, and I feel like that's what helps me uh while I'm playing for atmospheres to be set. Like it's to the point now where like sometimes Satana, my wife gets upset if I have somebody else to play certain things because she was like, uh, like the song I led you out here that I wrote, I gave it to a producer. I said, this just add color. Well, he took it, gave it to a real great keyboard player, get it back, and sometimes like theirs, it is great, but it's missing that that that touch. And it and it's I I know it's not skill, it is really God through what he's giving us to do. So me and Jeremiah, it's like that's where I'm able to connect with him because he has that ability where excuse me, we can connect that way. And uh he has such a great gift, and I I I just admire him. I try to sit back and just watch him and and let him lead, and we follow. And that I think that's what's the beauty of our group, because we have roles and we kind of have embraced those. And I feel like, you know, God moves through unity, uniformity, formation. He moves through that.
Speaker 4:So thanks for tying it in. I was gonna tie it in another way, what you were just kind of talking about about you sitting at the keyboard or piano and like learning that way. I'm gonna come back to that in a second. Um, because I think it ties in really good with uh where we want to kind of take this semester and just everybody kind of take a trip together of discovery of who we're becoming. Um, but I wanted to shout out real quick before we move on to that topic and get into that, Taylor Troutman, because she caught Justin the other day. And she said you can say what she said.
Speaker 2:I would say Taylor, you know, it's been the break, and she looked at me, she's like, I feel like I've been talking with you all break. How's it going? I'm so uh she caught up and she was telling me about how she's been listening to the podcast and everything. And so I feel so up to date.
Speaker 4:And uh, you know, anyway, it was just but that is I highlight that comment because that's really what I would hope that this is providing. It provides a lot of different things, but one of that, you know, like with athletes being on the road all the time or donors that we can't keep up to date necessarily, like because we're not all in the same space experiencing the same things, is that this can be kind of a central hub for that, and that you can have that feeling of, oh, I've I've been listening, I've been keeping up with kind of what's going on and the journey of what FCA is like trying to provide this space and athletes and stuff. And I was like, Taylor, you get it. Like this is great.
Speaker 2:Like, you also feel like, you know, you can't make every Monday night huddle and stuff. Right. And so if some people are like, man, I haven't been in a month, I can't go back, you know, and it's like, yeah, you can. And then this is just a way to kind of stay connected.
Speaker 4:Yeah, you can stay connected, feel like you know what's going on. And I think that as we if it works out this way to help do some of the topics on the podcast, um, that if you do go to FCA, it's just great because it expands on it. But if you don't and you're on the road, like you have something that's going to be similar to what we discussed, and so you can feel like you're a part and uh know that you're a part, even if you weren't physically able to get in the room. So, anyways, and we'll keep uh trying to make the production better. I'm learning things on the side, so hopefully I can keep making that more excellent. But okay, so Darius, you talked about you sitting at the piano and knowing that you had a gift, but not learning necessarily in a formal way, but just asking God to like reveal that. That's one thing that Justin and I were kind of talking about when we you've probably heard things like uh, I mean, the topic of the uh the name of this podcast is created to be. So, you know, it's in the title, uh, be not do, like all these types of like buzzwords again. Um but like how becoming can whenever we throw that word out there or formation or sanctification or these, you know, words we talk about, um, it can feel like we are striving to become. Does that make sense? Yeah. But like your picture and your story helps a little bit of what I'm kind of just simmering on, and is that it's already in you. Like you're in Christ, who you are is already in there. And so you are becoming but you have become. Does that make sense? And so it's like the journey is to discover what's in there. And that feels a little less pressure-oriented because it's more about oh, I I already have things that are being shaped. I just need to become aware my awareness needs to be there of what's going on. It's I'm not making that happen. I'm just becoming aware of what's happening.
Speaker 3:Right.
Speaker 4:Does anybody have any thoughts on that before we I got some definitions and things, but that's where we're gonna kind of start the semester. But any other wording or language around that anybody wants to throw in there?
Speaker 2:Go to the examples. Keep going. Keep going.
Speaker 4:Okay. Well, I just I like to start with definitions because it kind of like sets the conversation.
Speaker 2:Keep going.
Speaker 4:So we the first, you know, topic we want to talk about is becoming aware. And the idea is that formation is always happening. So an example would be we're not yes, we are talking about spiritual things, but just in a very practical way. Who or what are you who or what are you becoming? Who or what is shaping you? So I could I'm just gonna use the phone as an example because this is like such a like thing that is involved in all of our lives. I can pick up my phone a hundred times a day and tell myself I'm not going to be distracted by this device. But my action is going to form me, whether I believe it will form me or not. Does that make sense? Yeah. I can trick myself to believe I'm not being formed. But formation is happening. Right. Right? Because it's like these habits and practices.
Speaker 1:It's like uh uh I think it's Aaron Cole. He's a singer, but anyway, he did a song with Toby Mack, and that was one of their lines was everybody's becoming something. So you can't stop the formation.
Speaker 4:It's right there, you're becoming it's like the process has already started, like it's already in motion. I guess that's how we can say it. It's just a matter of what is in motion, you know? And to be kind of awakened or aware to what is taking actually taking place in your life is like what we want to like talk about. And so awareness, just you know, if you just Google like what's the definition of awareness, um, the quality or state of being aware, knowledge and understanding that some Something is happening or it exists, promoting a heightened awareness of a problem. Um so yeah, uh that's that. And then like they had some other, you know, I mean, if we were gonna get into like some psychology terms, I didn't, I just took like the first little section because I was like, that's too much for me, getting into like consciousness and all that stuff. If you want to have that conversation, I'll have it. But um off the podcast, leadership and social awareness, self-awareness, understanding your own emotions, strengths, and impact, other awareness, recognizing and understanding the emotions, needs, and perspective of others, so empathy, and then systems awareness, grasping the dynamics, values, and norms within groups, organizations, and broader environments. Um, I think so much about like sports in this, you know, you're in different environments. I mean, even like when you go to college, getaway, it's like read the room. What are the rules in this space? Yeah. Who are the players? Like, you just have that awareness of dynamics, or, you know, like the four of us, we've built relationships, we've had conversations. So there's a certain degree of like trust that I don't have to build up like some kind of I don't know, not case, but I don't have to convince you. Like you know me enough I can just say stuff. And it's not like, well, she was just a jerk today. You know, like it's like there's space for that because you've built that rapport. Uh, so you learn those types of things. Uh so those are some of the things about awareness that popped up whenever I Googled it. But I just wanted to get y'all's thoughts on, I mean, I've talked about awareness, but yeah, what are your thoughts on awareness or any stories capturing any moments where you can like remember the importance of being aware or like even the concept of that's important, that I'm aware of my emotions or aware of what's going on in the lives of other people or in environments that I'm in, things like that.
Speaker 1:I was gonna say this isn't like a story, but now that you're saying this, I realize I'd do this with my kids without knowing what I was doing because you know, you take them in settings and I'm like, like you need to pay attention to what the people around you are doing. Like if they're not up and running around, you shouldn't be up and running around. Yeah, that's how you realize that what I was doing. So look at that.
Speaker 4:Learned something. I like how we all take deep breaths.
Speaker 2:I I think I mean one that just comes to mind, and I'll I think more will come, is my the awareness that I let this game, baseball, change me um based on how I performed. And I wanted to like, I just got so tired of that cycle that it was finally like one of those moments of like, this is a problem. And I need to this needs to get fixed.
Speaker 4:What was your what were you doing that was so outside of your character that like caught your attention?
Speaker 2:It would just be the way I treat people or I wouldn't be fully engaged in a space or I didn't feel like I could I could um be myself because I didn't pitch well or whatever, and you just realizing like it doesn't matter, I have to face these things head on. I can't not let not be myself um or be happy or like I mean I didn't mean I'm not gonna it's not gonna bother me. Like I would love to pitch better. That bothers me, but to face that um frustration and that like intimidation of the moment type deal to face that and jump right in is where it breaks because it's just a whole bunch of other expectations and things swirling around me that really I'm letting affect me and impacting how I processed the moment.
Speaker 4:Did someone have to make you aware of how different you were?
Speaker 2:Um, I think it's a little bit of both. I think you gotta be around people that'll teach, you know, speak the truth to you.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:But then there's also an internal awareness of just like I I'm tired of this. Like, you think you gotta be in spaces where that you see other people operate in it as well, and um and then you realize like, man, I'm just not real free here letting this grab a hold of me.
Speaker 4:And yeah, so I mean it sounds like observation is part of becoming aware. Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:Oh, observation for sure. And then um, yeah, and then having other people maybe point out, like, hey, here's another way. Here's something to consider, you know?
Speaker 1:Well, I was just having a conversation with one of the softball girls because I do feel like I mean, all sports have their own mentalness to them. But I feel like softball and baseball are maybe like amplified, maybe, and that's maybe that's just my view. But that's one thing she was saying was like you get to a point where you're like speaking things that are not true to yourself. And I might not be saying it out loud, but she said she started like just realizing she wasn't herself. And that's kind of been my prayer in that before I ever even went and met with her. Like, how can I speak life into them? Because I mean, ultimately you do, if you're not self-aware with it, you start thinking those things are true when they're really not. So and being willing to fail, like gosh, baseball and softball, you fail more than you succeed. And I'm sure like like I said, all sports probably. I know basketball, shooting, same, but like if you if you're three out of five at the plate, that's pretty dang good.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's a heck of a game. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 4:So I think I think in other sports, uh not this isn't true. We're not we're not talking about this today, but I think that there's more faster uh opportunities to make it up. Yeah. Or like, you know, you're not shooting well, but you can play defense. Like there's things that you can do that's like, but you don't know if you're gonna get a fly ball to catch, or you know, like you don't know if that's gonna come to you. Yeah, nine more people to get back to the phone. Which is like I think that's what to me, and I don't I didn't really play those sports growing up, but like that's uh would be a huge challenge.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 4:Yeah. Okay, so awareness for you, Darius.
Speaker:Um one of the things that um like Justin said, he was talking about the uh observation piece. I believe observation is a pillar um of awareness. Um I had a young man, um, or I have a young man that plays the drums in my church. And so I am um I'm I'm a musician, come from a musician family. Um and so what happened, um, I was this young man was naturally gifted to play. Like he had the coordination to play the drums. So I'm at the church working with him, and I'm just getting frustrated with him. Like to the point where everything I stop, I'm trying to explain, no, you can't, you gotta do this, you know this. And it kind of finally hit me until one point I said, forget about everything that I'm saying and play it the way you would play it. Because I could see uh the innocence and the joy fade as I'm critiquing. And I said, just play it how you would play it. That's okay. Act as if I didn't say anything. And we started over and it was different, but I saw the joy, the innocence came back, and I so this is what I realized in that moment. Am I trying to help him become the best version of him, or am I trying to help him to become what I think he should be?
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker:And sometimes um playing sports, uh working in ministry, we look at people as projects and not as a person. As it's kind of like I got to the place like what uh Justin was saying, I could very well connect with that because for me is I got tired. Like like I got tired of always because you you if you're not careful, you're always bothered with something with a person because they're not they're not a particular picture. Right. So uh not actual picture baseball, but a picture. A picture. Right. So uh, but I say that because um that's one of the things that I started you know observing, and then I I I even started pulling the reins on myself and saying fall out of love with a person's potential and fall in love with their reality. Like, because when I'm in love with their potential, it was causing me to hold them to a standard that the reality just was not that. And so uh when you're talking about awareness, you know, and then I start asking myself, uh, because I experienced so much success as a young person singing. Like I'm telling you, I was like me and my brothers, we was going somewhere everywhere singing in front of thousands of people. So when you are in those arenas, you start judging by gifts. Everything is how gifted you are, to the point where um there would be times where I would uh start noticing people that were really gifted, but you didn't feel that presence from God that was connected with them. And I start realizing it was about posture. So being aware of it doesn't matter how gifted I am, what is the posture of my heart? Like what is the the the reasoning behind, what is the foundation behind what I'm doing, um, how I'm doing it. And then especially being in ministry serving people, am I trying to make them what I think they should be? Or am I here to help them to become everything that God wants them to be? You know, and that's something that, you know, just being aware of how we feel. Now, I I do know that there was a work of God in my life because it's like God, He began to tell me, like, I'm not looking for perfection, I'm looking for pleasing. Like, and and that kind of helped me to be able to start changing how I serve, how I look at myself. So when you're talking about awareness, it's just, man, it's so many different things. Like, one of the things I can say, like, I met someone one time that I was saying, because of my awareness was off, I was saying that they were stubborn. Well, when God opened my eyes to really see, he began to show me sometimes that's a gift that you see as stubbornness is really a gift of strength and stability. They're not easily moved. It's like a person with faith. You know, if a person got real faith, and I'm talking about real faith in God, to a natural person, they would say, Oh, they just stubborn. They don't want to listen. No, it's like this, the Bible said, Who report what you believe? They believe God so much they're not moving off this square. Right. So awareness taught me that. You know what I mean?
Speaker 4:And did you have someone that modeled awareness? Like, how did your how did you know, how does your brain operate that way?
Speaker:When you say model awareness, like or teach your awareness, like where do we learn things? I I feel like for me, I feel like it's it's uh a few things. I feel like experiences, um doing something and getting a result that's completely opposite to what you wanted. Uh Justin said it, accountability, talking to people. And when people would say stuff like, Well, when you said this or when you done this, this is how it made me feel. And you like, okay, that's what my action was, but my intentions was not that. So then that in itself makes you aware. Well, next time I gotta make sure. But there's some people that would hear that feedback and then be like, Well, you heard me wrong.
Speaker 4:You're right.
Speaker:But see, I feel like this It would be like no willingness to observe, learn, but I think I think because sometimes we fall so in love with us and we fall so in love with our intentions at times, that and then it's I feel like it's a natural thing. Nobody wants to know they're not doing good. Nobody wants to know they didn't convey a message right. Nobody wants to know they and I feel like that takes a maturity. If I take the initiative to not even engage with that, it's like, do I really care? And I'm and I'm saying this, me being you've pastor and ministry, and you dealing with young people. Like, you have to be willing to shift and maneuver for the sake of the message to not be marred. You get what I'm saying? So it's like that that parent that's telling their child they love them, and the only thing they they said this is tough love, but the only thing they're getting is the tough. Right. It's like there's no love in it, you know. But that I feel like that takes awareness, that takes accountability. And so um some of it I was taught by experience, then some of it I was taught through conversation, through uh, I'm just gonna say reality checks, you know, accountability partners, like like Dares, you you got a great thing, but you're not doing, you're not carrying this out great. Like if you don't change, this is what this is gonna produce. And it's nothing like having somebody that I got two things I say. You will not listen to who you don't like, and you can't help who you're frustrated with. It's nothing like talking to a young person and their body language is saying, yes, sir, but you can already tell they completely checked out. Right. Because of, you know, and awareness taught me that. Yeah.
Speaker 2:It's good.
Speaker 4:Brandy, you got something to add about awareness? I'm like taking notes over here. One of the things that I think that definitely helps is if you can be aware and just observe how things, what you can learn. I like I think that you kind of measure things, not in a sense of like, am I doing good enough measuring, but like you measure, okay, this is what this person said, this is what I meant. There's some kind of discrepancy. And so now I gotta figure out where is a discrepancy. But that takes time and it takes a lot of effort to do that.
Speaker:And it takes trust. Yeah. It takes, I'm saying time, effort, and then also trust. Because like, if we have that, some things may trigger me that you have nothing to do with. Right. But if there's trust, you can say, well, I know this is what I said. This is what you heard. Like, what was it that made you? You get what I'm saying? And then I can start realizing, because like I'll say this I deal with a spirit of rejection. Dealing with a spirit of rejection sometimes will make me feel like a critique is really opposition. You get what I'm saying? Like, you're not. I'm interpreting that you are against me, and you're actually for me. Right. It's just you're trying to help improve. So then I had to like that relationship of trust, help me to see, okay, you're not against me, you're for me. But the reason why I took it this way, because of somebody said something against me in my past, right? That, you know, it it was it seemed like a a critique, but it really wasn't a critique of improvement. It really was you were uh actually against me. So that's why I say the trust factor, the person that you took like it takes time.
Speaker 2:I mean, it it does, but these are the formation opportunities that you don't need to neglect. Right. It's not, wow, we really messed this up. How do we avoid this again? And let's do everything we can to avoid it instead of going, that happened. What an opportunity for us to grow. And like for me to grow more aware and observe more about what I'm actually doing so I can be better for everybody else. It's easy to take that. And for myself, you know, and so I mean, kids do that to you. I mean, you I've just i.e., recently Abby's got a tone back, and Bethany goes, see, that's what you do. And I'm like, Oh yeah. And Justin said, I don't want to talk about it right now. Not this morning.
Speaker 4:I said, No, I'm talking about it right now.
Speaker 2:And that happened this morning. This morning. Okay, and so it's like before the podcast. Yeah. And I think we, you know, you talked, maybe we could just sit on that for a second, but there's another instance you talked about the posture and the gift. And I got to, okay, this is where we have like a bit of a crossroads, I feel like. We take a gift that somebody has, and we've get modeled this. This is an observation thing, good or bad. I think this bad, there's a good side, bad side. We take the gift and we encourage the person on the posture side of it. Maybe that's modeled for us. Maybe you see that in somebody. But most of the time we see the gift, and especially in this spiritual realm here, we do this, we leverage it. Let's leverage this gift for this. And this term I hear from around time to time, maximum kingdom impact. Leverage it for this instead of that's that's not what even what it's for. Helping people discover what they're made to do and who they actually are. That's the goal. How and from that place impact just as it was. And from that place, it's a natural byproduct. And we can we can turn that into a business model, you know, and we get young talents like you were, and you had a crossroads where you could have gone certain direction and the Lord kind of put a stop to it. Right. Right? And so anyway, that was just kind of a fun thing. Leverage that word, I'm not a I'm not a fan, it kind of is like uh makes me give you a little tick, you know. Um, because we can throw that influence thing around because especially with athletes, they all have influence, they all have this unique space that they're in for this time. And we get so caught up in like you have to be sharing this and this and this in every interview and all these things. Instead of if formation is the priority, the overflow of that just happens.
Speaker:And it causes like authentic.
Speaker 2:And it's authentic. Like Fernando Mendoza, that's authentic.
Speaker:And that's what I was thinking about, even what you're saying there is with that, you have the impact. I think sometimes we want the influence even at the expense of impact.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker:So when you say it that way, because you're thinking about it, like we push all of these gifts, but then what I started to see is okay, the people that don't have those gifts or a gift that's as expressive, a lot of times they get pushed to the back. You know, or a lot of times it's like, well, you're not as important. And and I I've seen it when we build so much on these things, and that gift is gone, and the real foundation of what you have is having to be shown for most people either panic or try to find something to harry up and quickly replace the gift. And it's like the posture, it's like, okay, we we can build on posture. Because you can like I I just feel like what I'm learning is posture is something everybody can have, even when they don't have that gift. And when you build like that, you always will be able to have true impact. And that's that's that's in anything. That's why I I'm gonna give him a shout out. Josh Hubbard. One of the things I love about Josh is he's as great as a gifted player as he is, his posture, one of the the best player and the hardest worker. The best player, like, and I'm and I'm saying this, so it's not just about his abilities, but it's about his heart behind every drill. I'm doing the best I can do. In practice, I'm being the best version I can be in games. And I'm saying this, so I'm saying when you have that as a great gift, but a greater posture, like that's something that you you see it and say, okay, this is something that we all need to take notice of. I'm not looking at how many three-pointers he made. I'm looking at in practice, literally seeing this guy do drills and shake hands with every person, managers, grad assistants, yeah, like and giving everybody the same treatment. Don't it don't matter. To see him show up that way, as gifted as he is, that's posture.
Speaker 2:That's good exactly. It's a big thing where it's like um let me see if I can communicate this. When somebody steps into that formation and and like understands a gift, gifts, whatever they have, they start walking in that wholeness of that. The fruit of that and the impact of that is it gives you permission, your permission, your permission to actually grow in your gifts. It's not that mine's more important, it actually brings others to the table, and so therefore that gets passed to them. Okay, and so it's this beautiful deal of like it's calling out their gifts, which you need their gifts to enhance yours and give you greater perspective and just greater awareness as well. And so that's the beauty of this like body and this everybody has gifts to bring to the table. And so what happens, we elevate somebody else, we squelch the development of others, and then we have people sitting in the back going, Well, I'm not like that. I can't be that. You're not supposed to be that. And so that's the the great thing about it. The posture is so important, and we have to be really careful as leaders that we're not leveraging certain things to accomplish certain things that we want, because that's not what it's about. It's meant meant to give it away. I'm gonna bring somebody in, give it away so that they can become what they need to be, so they can learn to give it away to the next. And so as a whole, we're all just growing in such a big way and and um growing in awareness, growing in formation of who we actually are meant to be.
Speaker 4:Yeah, and I think that it's really hard to be aware uh or walk in awareness if you are uh defensive and offended. Yeah, you can. Like it's really I think pretty impossible to be able to like because I do think it's a skill.
Speaker 2:But it's also a journey you're gonna have to face. Like you're gonna have to face every one of those things on this journey, like offense and defensive And your brain can take that one way and it can be like, well, they did this today, and you build up these cases, or you could say it's a different brain to say, I wonder why that upset me so much.
Speaker 4:Takes you down a different path.
Speaker:Or like you said this morning, when you saw something in Abby, you said, You're dad. Like, like what I'm saying is sometimes what helps us to become aware is seeing us in somebody else. Like that's why they responded that way. Or I can connect, I see why. That's why when I started when I was became aware, when I became aware of some of the things I dealt with, it also helped me to see that in others, which helped me to reason if I'm talking to them through conversation because I have insight. You understand, right? It helps me to kind of help win them because, like Justin said, I think that's what's hurting a lot of us. We try to avoid it. Right. We try to maneuver around it. And I just feel like this if you don't face it, he can't fix it. Like you have to, it's a growing, like we talk about growing pains, but it's really a growing pain. You have to face it, have that tough conversation. And then I'm gonna say this, it doesn't happen overnight. No. Like, like I think that's when you're talking about formation, just you said it, it's so many different factors that come into formation, but it's a part of the journey. It's a journey. This is not what they say, it's not a sprint, it's a marathon. So those are things that we are be like we are becoming, but even what you said begin in the beginning, we're becoming what we already are. Yeah. It's like right, you it's it's already there. And that's why I think some of the things that has happened for me and happened with me was once I was open to the fact that it is already there. God knows what he wants from me. And I think about a scripture that says, count it all joy when you fall into diverse temptation. It says, knowing that the trying of your faith, the testing of your faith, the proving of your faith, it worketh patience. But then it says, let patience have a perfect work, that you may be perfect and entire wanting nothing. Right. Meaning, this is formation.
Speaker 3:Right.
Speaker:Formation is a journey. I'm building, I'm I'm grooming. But, you know, so it's being aware that even in everything that we're facing, God is using and allowing things to help us to be what He uh what we already are in Him. Right.
Speaker 4:Yep, that's good. And I'm gonna shout out Justin because uh it might sound intense that I called him out this morning.
Speaker 2:But what I do I married you, I don't want to go.
Speaker 4:Well, what I appreciate, what I appreciate about Justin is that I can't.
Speaker 2:You signed up for this. I can eat every bit of it. Formation.
Speaker 4:I chose formation over a life of ease. Is that he will he will push back or he will say things like, I don't want that right now. But I think that we have definitely come to a point in our relationship where I know when it's time to shut up and talk about it later, or just be like, nah, sorry. Like this is happening now. And we've reached that point, I think.
Speaker 2:Oh, we ain't going anywhere.
Speaker 4:We in this um, Brandy, I'm gonna call you out if you want to share this story. But I know that you've shared whenever you shared um your testimony and your story, I've heard you talk about a time where you became aware of like having that front of like, oh yeah, I'll do what you want.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 4:But then being like, I'm still gonna do my own thing. Yeah. So I don't know if you want to share anything about that.
Speaker 1:Uh I mean, I would say I was pretty much always aware that I was doing it, but I wasn't sitting with the Lord. So I know, you know, like I I think like we're becoming what we behold. And I was not beholding the Lord in those moments. And so that wasn't flowing out of me. I didn't really care. That was just like more of a people pleaser thing. Like I was just like, this is what I'm gonna do because it's the right thing. Because I think I'm more others aware most of the time. So it was like, wow, if I see that, then that pleases you in your moment, but then I just move on and do my own thing. But I wasn't, like I said, living in the word. And to me, like that's one thing too, even with like the small groups and the huddles, is instead of having so much pressure, because in the beginning, I'm not gonna lie, I wanted it to be all perfect. I wanted to ask the right questions and say the right things. And now I'm like, no, I'm just gonna sit in what the Lord is teaching me, and that's the best gift I can give them in that moment, and letting them tell me what's the Lord teaching you, also, right? We're in it together.
Speaker:So can I say something? She said something that that that clicked with me. Um, because I think there's something we have to do too, is she said uh she was so aware of others. It took me to get sick. Like, and and while I was sick, I couldn't do for other people. And it kind of killed me. But then it's like I've been so uh people pleasing and other people focused, I wasn't even really aware what's going on with actually with me. Yeah and so um and then another thing you said too that I thought about, you was like you really wasn't, it really wasn't about pleasing God at that time. I think sometimes we we should look at that. Like when we neglect God, our awareness is gonna be off. I don't care like how smart you feel like you are, you you may be able to read some rooms, but you won't be able to read every room. You won't have that, uh, and I I feel like that's why it's important for us to prioritize him so we can make sure that whatever moment that we may be in, like you spoke to it earlier, you and Justin can have a tough moment. But some moments you know when to scale back, and then some moments you know like we gotta we know we got to we got to talk about it. Like, like yeah, we we pushing through. And I'm saying I feel like that's a God factor who helps us to be able to realize and know, you know, and and and I'm just saying that because while we have people listening, like if you prioritize God, He makes you aware of it, like sometimes we need to cut the music off. We've been in huddles where we cut the music and go straight to prayer. And then there's sometimes I've seen Justin, Jeremiah, just keep playing, we're gonna sit right here. That's awareness. Your awareness that God is moving in a different way, and we don't want to mess this moment up by just cutting it off. You know, so I I when you said that it just made my mind think of some of those things. Yeah.
Speaker 4:And I think so much of awareness does take like just being quiet, you know? Like sometimes you're like, I need to stop talking and just watch for a little bit. Yeah, you know? And then if you're a watcher, sometimes you gotta start talking to like put words to what you're observing, you know, process a little bit. But it is a it is a skill, it is a habit, it's a pattern. And I wrote down perspective earlier, I think as you were talking, Darius, because I was thinking about similar to what you said, Brandy, is like if we don't have, if you don't have God's perspective on something, it's gonna be very hard to be aware because there's so many different, you know, factors or inputs of what you're aware, like who's telling you to be aware of what? That goes back to that question, who or what is shaping you, you know? And um, so anyway, we're gonna talk more about keep talking about that, but that's one thing I wrote down. And then I keep several podcasts I've mentioned, not because me and Justin did like a phenomenal job or anything, but the content on one of the podcasts was about learning to win. And we discovered through that conversation there's really not a loss, and this was more sports related, but when you can just openly engage with the data of a performance. Like if I can just see the data and not be scared of what's on that stat line, but say this is actually helpful information for me, not to judge whether I did the right or wrong thing or made the right or wrong decisions, but like it's an opportunity. It's kind of the same relationally, you know, like if someone gets mad and they're off base, I think that's a lot of times the hard part is discerning like, is this real? Like, do I did I really mean that? Is what they're accusing me of true or is it false? I mean, it means a lot when you're trying to make sense of like who you are. Yeah. But then like you can still take from that, you're like, well, it made them think something. So is there something in this? Do I need to flush this or do I need to like take this data of what just happened and evaluate a little bit and learn from it? And again, that's a skill, but that's another uh podcast episode. But I think that goes back to the posture. Like, I think that's impossible if you don't have a learning posture, an observation, like I want to learn, I want to grow. Um, so the awareness piece, obviously that's a lot to go with that. But what we want to become aware of is this idea that formation is always happening. Again, going back to the beginning, like you can try to convince yourself it's not, but ultimately whatever you're whatever you're showing up for and what's consistent in your life will shape you. Good, bad, ugly, it's gonna have an impact on your life. Wow. And so conviction. So formation, again, if you just Google this word, an act of giving form or shape to something or taking form, development, the manner in which a thing is formed. And Darius already mentioned a verse. I think that's first Peter. What did you do James one? Oh, James. One of the things that we've already said that maybe we'll tie in here, I was um telling Justin there was this time where I had been journeying with the Lord in prayer through some things, and I was about to run this race in Dallas, Texas, and I just had anticipation for what I felt like the Lord was gonna do in that race. If we're if you've ever run like a distance race, it in the same way that you said that music can be this spiritual experience. I mean, it especially running that distance. I mean, there's just so much going on, like dependence on the Lord, like your body not breaking down, like just a lot. And so I pray a lot when I run those races. But I had a certain level, it'd be too much to try to explain, but expectation of what that experience would be like that day. But right before the race, so right before running 26 miles, I had this like feeling in my stomach, like what I think is gonna happen today, it ain't gonna happen. Like this journey I've been on with the Lord. And so I ran the race really sad and like depressed. Like I'm thinking in my head- It's a long time to run sad. I'm depressed. I know. I was like, this is so it took me forever, probably eight miles, six to eight miles to get out of that like depressed state and just run and try to enjoy the race. But this is my point in sharing this story because this is probably like, I mean, I've had other moments like this, but there's a point I want to make. So afterwards, I was so frustrated that what I felt like I was journeying through in prayer and what the Lord was showing me was not what I experienced that day. And I just remember like, like just hashing it out like in prayer. And I what came out of me was anger, and what came out of me was disappointment. And I did not know those two things were in me. So it's like Justin, you were saying we don't really get to choose what we we can't, we do have impact, like uh influence over what is forming us and shaping us, but also we don't always necessarily get to choose what forms and shapes. I I didn't know that I was gonna go. I had so much anticipation, so excited. And then it just was like a balloon that popped right before that race in my chest. Like, this is not gonna be the experience I thought it was gonna be today. And I'm gonna have to work through this for 26 miles. And then to just the anger that came out of me was so surprising. But it was also one of those things where I could have been really bitter at the Lord and been like, forget this. Like, I'm not gonna journey in prayer like this anymore. I'm not gonna explore things with him like this. But it was more of this input from me, this data from me of wow, I had no idea I was that angry. I had no idea I was that disappointed. I'm thankful that this like was sifted out of me today.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 4:There's no way I could have found this without this situation squeezing that out of me. Does that make sense? So formation is that process in which like those types of things happen where we like those like who I really am is in there, but I've got this anger and disappointment trying to choke that out. And so I can't figure out who I am if I've still got these things battling for me. And so these situations we go through. I know that you shared a story when you were in college. We might have shared on the podcast, I think we did, because I always reference back to it, but when you were in, I think it was Alaska.
Speaker 2:Yeah, fear of failure came out bad. I mean, it was like came out at the forefront, had to be addressed. It was an outing where I started the game and didn't get a single out, went through the whole lineup. So um like a variety of things happened. So right.
Speaker 4:So if you had pitched a perfect game, you wouldn't have discovered, to my point, that you there was fear of failure still in there.
Speaker 2:Well, that was the worst possible thing that could happen on the mound is to not get a single out. Right. For the whole time. And I threw nine to nine batters, maybe ten batters. And so, yeah, it just all kind of hit. And so all the things that kind of can they're around the voices you hear came out really loud because there's no there was no buffer there. And the Lord meant it for that to happen. Right. To to where it would have to, it was be like, okay, do you want to still live in this, or can you you can change this if you want? And I just remember being in the dugout and yelling out loud in front of everybody, shut up. And they were all like, What's let's go to our pigeon today. And uh, but that's when the stuff really died. It it got exposed fully, and um, that was the death sentence for it. Now it would linger, like some things would pop up from time to time, but um, that was the victory of like she just was like, Look, I gave you victory over this. And here it is.
Speaker 1:Hearing both of y'all's stories takes me back to when I couldn't play anymore. I guess because I had staked so much on that in my life. And then I just remember this one run in particular, and I went and just ran for like hours, and I didn't just go run for fun then, but I remember passing like my now it's my sister-in-law, her sister, and she's like, What are you doing? I was like, I don't know, I'm just running. But I just remember being like so disappointed, like, what now? And so I think that kind of was like the start of my like refining myself, I guess, in a sense.
Speaker:So I will say, uh, when the Lord uh had instructed me to let go of uh the singing ministry with my brothers, like that was uh, and I actually done it.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker:Um but I became a person uh after doing it, um, that you know, my wife she started asking me, did God really tell you to do this? Because like you're so angry, you you're not yourself. And what I realized was um, and she said, You I I really want to encourage you to talk to God about it. You need to go back and see. And I said, Well, I know he told me, but what happened when I went back and prayed, I didn't realize how much um that I use stages and platforms to mask. Uh that it's like those are the places I vented to like they masked a lot of things. Um And so because I don't have that outlet, like I was able to realize God wasn't God for me like I thought He was. Because it's like you can sing all these songs about me, and now that you don't have this platform, um people treating you like yesterday's news, like oh, he used to could, you know, and it's like all of those things that I use singing to cover up, I realized in that moment, like God really wasn't God for me. Like I thought he was. So I said this, it was in that hard place that I really got to know God and I really got to know myself. I really got to see that I am much more valuable than just a singer. Like God loves me. And one thing he wanted me to know uh was I had to love myself beyond an applause. If I didn't get an applause, it didn't matter. If I got an applause, like that shouldn't move me. The crowd, you know, and so you talk about formation and you was talking about even squeezing out of you. I have to be honest, uh those uh those were moments. Those are moments I look back now and celebrate the most. Yeah. Because it's like sometimes the the part that he's squeezing out is that part of you that's holding on to something that he doesn't want to be a part of you. You get what I mean? So I know just you were talking about the failure, and and I I personally like I didn't think about like this because I didn't play baseball or but when when uh when Brandy said it, I thought about it like, man, it's so uh no, I think you said it better, it's so singular. Like you mess around and go through that many banners, like you don't have, you can't hide behind anything. And and it's such a personal mental push, you know, that you have to get through. But um just thinking about some of the moments like that, those are the moments when I look back at my life that has helped me to become what I've been able to become. You're talking about formation. So, you know.
Speaker 4:You sharing that story made me think about there is this trip with athletes in action I was on. And I guess one of the things about awareness is whenever you are hearing people teach uh the word or you're in it yourself, you do whether sometimes our pictures aren't right about who Jesus is or whatever, but you hear these. Um, but then sometimes they are. So you gotta sort through all of that. But like the you start learning I guess what you should feel like or look like, you know. And I think that's where the approach to like get there is hard. Like you can be like, okay, well, I'm not doing that, like what Jesus did, so I'll work to get to that point, you know. But I don't so I think that that is a big piece of awareness, is at least seeing some kind of contrast. Like if if we're if we are capable of doing stuff like approaching life like this or like being like him, so it gives us some kind of contrast, at least, like that's a starting point of like this is a picture of what I should be able to become, whatever, however you want to word that. So I um was on this trip with Athletes in Action and I just that's again like I'm like trying to like narrow in how did I become aware? I don't really know that answer. Like, how do you just start doing that? Like, I don't know, but I remember like really wanting compliments from the other girls playing basketball on this team. And some of that probably that desire came because I was a walk on here at Mississippi State, you know. So now I'm on this trip, and so I'm trying to like find my place because we're going and playing games. It's not, I mean, it was a mission trip, but we're competing too. And so I'm kind of like, where am I in the pecking order? What's my value here? And I just had this moment on the bus where somebody gave me a compliment about something, and it was like immediately I noticed, okay, now who else is gonna give me a compliment? It was like this oh, that's kind of strange because that's what I've thought that I've wanted this whole time. But then when I got that, I wanted more. Yeah. Yeah. And so just that awareness to be like, what is going on with this? You know, and then you start observing like, does anybody else care to give props? Like nobody else really seems concerned about. I don't know. I mean, I don't remember girls talking about their playing time or being concerned, but like that was like a big thing for me. So that was a formational moment for me, I know, in college, of something that I was like wrestling with that of, and and my my go-to, I'm not like this anymore, but would have been like, I've got to crucify this stuff and get it out of me. Like seeing it as bad and wrong, and like I've got to discipline this self out of me and like attack this stuff, you know, kind of like a this is in a bad column. Like I shouldn't be uh wanting compliments. I shouldn't be. Instead of kind of taking it like this is information from me, like you know what I'm saying? Like it, so it's different now because I feel like I definitely operate more like that now, of where it's like, oh, this is just data. Like I want, so let me just kind of sort through this and figure out what I can learn and observe from this. And then that way I don't have to operate that anymore because it's exhausting. Yeah. I don't want to operate like that. Um, so anyway, just another story I thought of. And we won't get in this today, but I'm gonna make a note about like just maybe talking through, you know, are there stages in formation that we've experienced? Maybe there's not, maybe it's just one big thing. Um, but then even the intimidation of that word, like if you think formation, like I I do, there's scriptures about this image of the potter and the clay. And so you think, like, if you're like sharing what Jesus can do for you and all this stuff, and if you were to use this word formation, it's like, yeah, it's like he shapes you and molds you. Like, you're like, I don't know about that. Like, you know, because I know that that would be the case. Like I would work through something, finally get to the other side, and then almost have like this tension of, oh God, I don't want to do that again. Yeah, whatever. Like there's gonna be something else. And I think that now for sure is like such a matter of perspective, but it's still hard for me. It's still messing with me sometimes. The discomfort, maybe that's there. But Darius referenced this. He said, Some of those moments are what I'm most thankful for. So I think in hindsight, I'm grateful, but it does not feel pleasant at the time, you know.
Speaker 1:Yeah, one thing that I um heard, I think you or maybe Justin say in the fall that is so true, if you really sit and think about it, is like it's okay to sit in the tension and be in that discomfort. And so like it does allow you to reflect and say, like, what does God want me to get out of this?
Speaker 4:Or And I think to just know that that's normal. Yeah. Cause I think there might be this fantasy picture that when you get to a certain age, you're not doing that anymore. Yeah. Or, you know, and it's like that's really a false impression or false reality.
Speaker 1:Like it's where I mean, uh who really wants to be intentional to it's like, how can I quickly get out of this right now?
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Like, can I shove it and not think about it anymore? Can I do this and make it better on the outside? Like, which you can.
Speaker 4:That goes back to kind of like the whole you can fool yourself to be like, well, it's not that big of a deal, whatever. But you know, sometimes you come up against other situations that might have higher stakes later on in life, like when you're parenting your children and that same little thing. Not for the faint of heart. Creeps up. Um, so just like a parting thought is we aren't trying to be to be formed, we are being formed. Like it's already in there to discover. So sometimes it just takes becoming aware that that process is already at work and then just engaging with that process. It's already going on. It happens slowly, quietly, and faithfully. And your presence matters more than your perfection. So it's helpful just to remember, just to that we can stay consistent to just show up, invest in the things that we know will form us and shape us and help us discover who God has like made us to be and what's in there. And yeah, be with other people on that journey. Ask good questions, learn, observe. Anything else?
unknown:It's good.
Speaker 2:It's good. We need a part two.
Speaker 4:We will. We will have more to all this. So thanks for listening today. And we hope that this is coming after having to meet being able to meet for FCA. But if it's not, at least it's start the conversation. So y'all keep coming back. Uh, we'll just keep talking on these topics. Thanks for listening. Thanks for listening to the Created To Be Podcast. To learn more about FCA at Mississippi State, visit www.msufca.org and follow us on Instagram at hellstatefda underscore. If you would like to become a financial partner, visit www.fca.org/slash donate to sew into the work God is doing through FDA at Mississippi State.