114. Is Your Body Tensing Up? 3 Steps to Find Peace with God in a Tense Relationship

In this episode, host Alexandra explores the physical and spiritual reasons behind our body’s “fight, flight, or freeze” response. She talks about how physical tension—the tight shoulders, clenched jaw, or knot in your stomach—is a signal that our nervous system perceives a threat. However, as believers, we can use this moment of awareness as an invitation to lean into our faith. Alexandra offers three practical, faith-based steps to stay grounded and present with God, even in difficult conversations or moments of stress. This episode is a guide to moving from a place of fear to a place of trust, using our bodies as a tool for worship and connection with Christ.

The 3 Steps:

1. Awareness: The first step to staying grounded is simply noticing your physical reaction without judgment. This is a form of “taking every thought captive” and bringing it to God, as described in 2 Corinthians 10:5: "We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ."
2. Breath: Use your breath—a gift from God—to center yourself. Practice deep, intentional breathing as an act of stillness, connecting your body to the present moment and God's presence, as Psalm 46:10 reminds us to “Be still, and know that I am God.”
3. God’s Truth: When your mind spirals with fear, consciously replace those thoughts with God's truth. Recall verses like 1 John 4:18, which says "There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear," and remind yourself that you are safe and loved in Him.

Call to Action:

This week, notice your body's tension without judgment but with curiosity. Use your breath as a tool for stillness, and lean on God's truth to anchor you in His love instead of your fear.

And remember, God's love is always near...

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Transcript

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Hello and welcome back to Curious for Christ. I'm your host, Alexandra, and I'm so glad you are here Today I want to talk about something very real and very physical. Have you ever been in a conversation where everything inside you just wants to flee? Maybe it's a difficult moment with your spouse, a tense discussion with a family member or someone from your church or a tough phone call at work. Have you ever noticed your shoulders tightening, your stomach feeling tense or that knot somewhere in your body that signals stress? For me, it's usually my shoulders and jaw, and all I want to do is run away that physical tension. It is your body trying to tell you something. And if you haven't been paying attention to these signals. That's okay. Take a moment to lean in and notice. Chances are we all overlook these little signs multiple times throughout the day. Okay. In today's episode, we are going to explore why that tension shows up, and more importantly, how we can use our faith as an anchor. We'll talk about staying present and grounded, living out our faith in the small everyday moments, even when it feels like everything around us is falling apart. Let's go. Welcome to Curious for Christ. Do you ever find yourself lying, awake at night wondering about God's plan for your life? Maybe you wake up with big dreams, but feel unsure where to start or what your next step should be. If you're curious about exploring your faith and finding purpose, then you've come to the right place. Hi, I'm Alexandra. I too felt lost and sure of the direction my life was taking. I yearned to understand my purpose and have someone guide me, but I kept telling myself I was too busy. The timing wasn't right, and my lack of clarity prevented me from being consistent until I found Christ. He brought peace into my life and revealed the way to find purpose by anchoring myself. In him. In this podcast, we'll journey together exploring the Bible to gain a deeper understanding of him and cultivate your own personal relationship with Christ. So open up your Bible, put in those earbuds and listen up because God is speaking to you. He's making everything new and you don't wanna miss it. Let's get started. Let's first talk about the why behind the tense up. So what's happening? When we feel that physical contraction, it's our body's nervous system reacting to what it perceives as a threat. Our fight, flight, or freeze response kicks in and our body gets ready to protect us. But as believers, we know there's a spiritual layer to this too. Our adversary, the one who seeks to lie, steal and destroy, wants nothing more than for us to feel isolated and to retreat in fear. He wants to make us feel unsafe in our relationships, in our homes, even in our own bodies. He wants us to believe that we are alone in our struggle. But that is a lie. The Bible tells us in Romans eight, verses 38 through 39, that nothing can separate us from the love of God. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. This is our anchor. This truth reminds us that no matter how tense the situation feels, we are always safe and secure in God's perfect love. So part two, let me walk you through three ways to stay grounded in faith. So if the tensing up is an old pattern of fear, how do we choose a new path? How do we stay present and grounded and faithful? It all begins with step one awareness, the power of awareness. The first step is simply to notice. Don't judge it. Don't scold yourself for it. Just be aware of it. Notice the tightening in your shoulders, the clenching of your jaws, or the desire to just end the conversation and walk away. This is the practice of taking our thoughts and feelings captive. It's a key part of our spiritual growth. The apostle Paul writes in second Corinthians 10 verse five. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. When we notice that physical contraction, we are taking that feeling captive and bringing it to God. Step two, breathe and ground yourself. Once you are aware, your next tool is your breath. Your breath is a gift from God, a constant reminder of his presence. When you feel that tension, just take a slow, deep breath. Breathe in for four count, hold it for seven, and exhale for eight. And as you do, you can say to yourself, I am here. God is with me. The Bible tells us in Psalm 46, verse 10, be still and know that I am God. The simple act of breathing deeply is an act of stillness that allows you to know him and his presence in that moment. So let me share something about the Hebrew word for God that is Yahweh. It is often associated with the sound of our breath. Some scholars have pointed out that when we inhale it mimics the sound. Yah. And when we exhale, it mimics the very act of every breath we take is like saying God's name, a reminder that he is the giver of life and we worship him with every breath. As Genesis two verse seven reminds us, God is as close to you as the breath in your lungs. You can also try grounding yourself by pressing your feet into the floor, disconnects your body to the reality of the present moment, and helps to release that pent up tension. Step three. Connect to a deeper truth. This is the most powerful step, but it doesn't diminish the first two. But when your mind starts to spiral with judgmental thoughts or worries, consciously replace those thoughts with one of God's truth, your mind might be saying, this is not safe. I am not loved. But God's truth says There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear. That's from One John four verse 18. God's love is perfect. Your worth is not based on your performance and your safety is not tied to someone else's reaction. You are loved, worthy, and safe in him. When you feel that contraction, just remind yourself of that truth. So this is it for today. It is a short one, but I hope very practical and helpful. And remember, this is a journey of practice. It's not just a quick fix going through the three steps. It's a cyclical process of choosing to walk with God. Over and over and allowing the spirit to lead you. It takes courage to stay present when every part of you wants to retreat, but each time you choose to breathe instead of flee, each time you anchor yourself in his truth instead of your fear, you are walking in God's presence with every step you are embodying who God says you are, a new creation in Christ. So this week, my challenge to you is simple. Notice your body without judgment, but with curiosity. Use your breath as a tool of stillness and lean on God's truth to anchor you in love, not fear. Let me pray for you. Dear Lord, thank you for your perfect love that drives out all fear. Thank you for your presence that is always with us. Give us the courage to notice our feelings and behaviors, the wisdom to lean on your truth, and the grace to just stay present in every moment. In Jesus' name I pray, amen. Thank you for joining me on this episode of Curious for Christ. Please subscribe so you don't miss any other episode every Friday. And remember, God's love is always here with you. I will talk to you next time. Hi, I hope you enjoy today's episode. If so, would you like to take 30 seconds and share it with a friend who may also struggle with knowing God and his purpose for their life? Also, leave a review on Apple. Podcast and let me know what topics you'd like to hear about in the future. Your voice matters. I'll meet you back next Friday for another episode.