Ep 33 Ieva - Tango, Travel, and Feminine Connection with Ieva Kelpsaite

This episode explores how Argentine tango can transform the way we travel, connect, and relate to ourselves.  Terri speaks with Ieva Kelpsaite, a relationship coach who supports women in reconnecting with their emotions, bodies, and femininity through both her coaching and her long-time tango practice.  We discuss how tango creates instant community in unfamiliar places, why shared experiences matter more than sightseeing alone, and how movement can become a path to safety, confidence, and deeper self-connection.

Key topics

• Ieva Kelpsaite shares how her work as a relationship coach centers on helping women deepen their relationship with themselves and reconnect with their feminine essence.
• She explains that tango has been part of her life for 12 years and has shaped both her personal identity and her coaching approach.
• We discuss how tango helps women step out of a constant “doing” mode and into a space of being held, supported, and emotionally present.
• Ieva describes her move from Lithuania to the UK as part of an explorer mindset after finishing university and wanting to experience life in other parts of the world.
• She explains why tango and travel fit so naturally together because tango communities exist globally and often welcome newcomers quickly.
• The conversation highlights how tango festivals create shared experiences through dancing, music, culture, food, and even nature activities like kayaking and forest walks.
• Ieva shares that the most memorable part of travel is often not the place itself but the shared moments with other people.
• She explains tango as a deeply relational and spiritual practice, centered on connection rather than just steps or technique.
• Ieva recounts the personal story that first inspired her to try tango, including a movie scene and a milestone 30th birthday decision to book tango classes.
• We explore how her tango practice informs her coaching, especially around body awareness, safety, softness, and helping women feel grounded in themselves.

Timestamps

00:00 - Introduction to Ieva Kelpsaite and the role of tango in her life
 00:21 - Relationship coaching, femininity, emotions, and body connection
 01:08 - How tango opens up feminine creativity and presence
 02:13 - Moving out of survival mode and into enjoyment
 03:20 - Lithuania, moving to the UK, and the explorer mindset
 04:38 - Travel as a way to understand culture, not just take a holiday
 05:09 - Argentine tango versus ballroom tango and the global tango community
 06:27 - Why tango makes solo travel feel welcoming and safe
 07:30 - Communication beyond language and connecting with strangers
 08:29 - The tanda, three songs, and how tango reveals personality
 09:53 - Festivals, competitions, and why Ieva prefers community experiences
 11:02 - Montenegro, tango festivals, and combining dance with nature
 11:59 - Why shared meals, laughs, and moments make travel memorable
 13:07 - Choosing to explore tango more intentionally
 14:32 - Feeling like something is missing when travel does not include dance
 15:32 - What transformation tango creates after returning home
 16:10 - Tango as a spiritual practice built on connection
 17:09 - Coming back tired but soul-fed after days of dancing
 19:24 - The movie scene that first inspired Ieva to learn tango
 20:42 - Turning 30 and booking tango classes as a meaningful gift
 21:19 - First tango club experience and feeling the dance in the body
 22:48 - Deciding never to give tango up
 23:19 - How tango shaped Ieva’s coaching practice
 24:25 - Safety in the body, relaxation, and nervous system regulation
 25:17 - Why safety is central to her work with women
 26:39 - Tango as magic, femininity, and a lived Cinderella story
 27:31 - Traditional roles, leadership, and the feeling of being cared for
 28:52 - How tango can create healing through letting go
 29:43 - Where to find Ieva online and how to connect with her

Notable quotes

“Tango is playing a really big part in who I am and how I support women.”

“I feel like I’ve been fed on a soul level.”

“It just brings magic into my life.”

Contact mention

Ieva says listeners can find her through her website, Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube under her name, Ieva Kelpsaite.

Connect with Ieva:

Website: https://ievakelpsaite.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ieva.kelpsaite.3

Instagram : https://www.instagram.com/ievakelpsaite/

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@ievakelpsaite.relationships

Thank you for listening! Follow me on:

Instagram: www.instagram.com/terri_reynolds_coaching

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/share/1GqZp4QsP5/?mibextid=wwXIfr

Read my blog written for The Travel Coach Network

The Terri Reynolds Chapter of The Reinvention Era with Sarah Elizabeth

Unforget Yourself Podcast

Wander Mag feature - The Blue Issue  Pg 129

Transcript

Copy Transcript Copied

SPEAKER_02 0:51

Welcome to another episode of Wonderless Diaries. And today I am joined by Yeva. And Yeva is going to tell us all about what she does. I mean, she does, she's a tangle dancer. I mean, I can't wait to hear all about this. And it's lovely to have you here today. Thank you so much. So over to you. Tell us a little bit about you.

SPEAKER_00 1:08

Thank you. It's a pleasure being here, Terry, as well, of this wonderful podcast. So my name is Yeva. I'm a relationship coach and I currently support women. I help women to develop deeper relationships with themselves so that they can come back to their femininity. And I help them to reconnect with their emotions, with their bodies. So actually, Tango is playing a really big part in who I am and how I am and how I support people, how I support women. I have been dancing tango for 12 years now, and it opened up a part of me that I really love because when I dance tango, or as women, we are followers in there, we are being held in the moment. And this is such a wonderful protective feeling. And in that moment, you really feel the most feminine, the most creative, you know, the most exciting. And you actually, another thing that happens is that when the music starts playing and you come into that embrace, you forget everything else. Everything that is, you know, any worries that you have in life, anything that concerns you, like your mind kind of switches off, switches off. So I love that idea. I you know, I for in in my past, I used to be this lady who was surviving each day and really in this masculine mode, doing and being and taking care of everybody else apart from yourself, and not allowing myself to enjoy every day on my life, not even living my life. A lot of women say, I don't feel like I'm living my life because I'm being lost in all the responsibilities. So Tango really opened up that possibility for me to allow myself to enjoy, to be, to connect with my body, to be taken care of, to really come back to the feminine essence.

SPEAKER_02 3:20

Sounds wonderful. And don't you think that like as women, as women, we take all of that on ourselves, don't we? That we have to be everything to everyone. Yeah. Um, and I love what you're saying there, you know, to have something like tango to be able to just go and lose yourself in. I just want to do a tango lesson right now, please.

SPEAKER_01 3:44

Yeah, why not? So So where are you from? I'm from Lithuania.

SPEAKER_02 3:52

Oh from Lithuania. Lovely. So how long have you been? Um you're in the UK now, aren't you? I am, yes. So and how long have you been here? What brought you to the UK?

SPEAKER_00 4:03

I don't think that there is a single one single reason, you know, that's that made me come. But I think that I was very young at the time, so I just kind of finished my university and I was, I guess, in this explorer mode, like you know, I was wanting to explore, wanting to to be somewhere else, wanting to to see how people live in other parts of the world.

SPEAKER_02 4:28

Um, yeah, so I think that's how a lot of us start with traveling, or even if it is moving to another country, it's about the exploration, isn't it? And what's that? You know, what's that place all about? Even if you go traveling, it's for me, it's about understanding the culture and um everything about that country. I just I just love to learn about it. I don't just go for a holiday, I want to know about it. Um, and I think that's quite an important aspect of it. So obviously you're here. Now, so tell me more. Besides coming obviously here, have you done a lot of traveling as well in between?

SPEAKER_00 5:08

I would say a lot of travelling, but I've done I've done some traveling, and tango certainly inspired me to do more traveling.

SPEAKER_02 5:17

Well, tell me then. How do you combine tango and traveling? Tell me about that.

SPEAKER_00 5:22

Yeah, so if I think about tango, it's it's a huge global community of people who love tango. And that is, by the way, Argentine Tango. It's not a ballroom tango, it's Argentine, it's a specific, specific tango. It's the only one for me, I'm afraid. Yes. So anywhere you would go, you would almost likely to find a community there, a tango community, an active tango community. And in some countries, those communities are even more active because they also organize festivals. And the festival means that first of all, they invite the best Argentinian teachers to come and you know teach everything that they know about Tango, but that also attracts people from all over the world, really from different places in the world, to come and be part of that experience. And of course, dancing is you know, day and night dancing is a part of that experience as well. So I really, you know, when I compare when I go, let's say for a holiday with my family, and there's no dancing experience. And when I go on my own, and when I tap into these communities of people who are really most of the time are strangers, I don't know them at all. But one of the things that I always find there is that we speak a common language. Yes, you know, yes, and I'm always welcome. You'll you'll find a connection through Yes, it's a common connection, and you know, there is no because we understand Tango, there is just so much common between us, so much in common between us. So so I I never I'm never afraid to go alone to a country where I have, for example, never been to, because I know anytime I go there I will meet people, and I will meet me people from all over the places, and I will connect with them and I will dance with them. And I love this. I love it. And possibly make new friends as well.

SPEAKER_02 7:34

Yes, of course. And you know, as part of my um my business is I just want to bring this in because it's all about communication. And I work with women whose first language isn't English, um, and they get all quite uptight about the fact that they're speaking it okay, but when it comes to you know communicating it via a presentation or speaking in front of their peers, they lose their confidence. Yeah, they get all nervous about it. And what I try and say is it's not just about the language either. You know, I've been in situations where I don't speak their language, they don't speak mine, and we've had some sort of conversation, you know, so it's great, isn't it? It's but I love it, the fact that you've got not only it's it's dance, obviously, but you've got that other way. There's another way to communicate. It doesn't just have to be language, and I love that you touched on that. I love it.

SPEAKER_00 8:26

Yes, yes. And I think, you know, just to add a little bit of even more about what you know, what tango is, that something often happens that you dance with a complete stranger, but you have such a wonderful experience. So there is three dances in the tang in the tanda. We c we call it ta tanda, which means like we play three songs, and within three songs you get to, you know, come closer and to, you know, get to understand the person that you're dancing. And by the end of the time, you know, we understand how we how we dance with each other, we understand what kind of even personality you can get, a personality of the person because you know the way they they hold you, the way they interpret the music, the way they speak the music through their dance and express themselves, it tells a lot about their personality. But one other thing that I absolutely love, which is absolutely natural, there's no like even question about it, we don't even think about it, is that at the end of that tanda, and if we had a really great time, it's so natural for us to hug for one minute. Yeah. And you know, like hold each other in that hug.

SPEAKER_02 9:45

I I mean that's yeah, that's that's yeah. Um so but are you flying all around the world to go to to these festivals? Is it festivals or is it do you go to competitions? Do you do that as well?

SPEAKER_00 10:00

I don't do competitions yet, but hopefully maybe one day I I will I will consider that. Um it's probably one of the things on my bucket list.

SPEAKER_02 10:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 10:11

But yeah, generally festivals and and yeah, just meeting friends and at the same time, you know, learning about the culture of the places I'm I'm going. Because I want to also experience the culture of the people. And so, because you know, we make friends and we get to experience everything together. And there are some Tango festivals that include like there was one in July, which I have not been yet there yet, but I'm planning to go perhaps next year, is in Montenegro, where they combine everything, and Montenegro is such a beautiful, it's such a beautiful country, it's very picturesque, lots of lakes, a lot of nature. And uh, you know, they combine the organizers combine the Tango Festival with different kinds of activities around nature, so kayaking and you know, walking in the forest and swimming and you know, all together. So it's really like you you get to spend a lot of time with the people that you meet, and you really have an amazing time together. And you know, when I think about when I'm traveling anywhere and when I get to see new things, I feel that the moments that we rem or I remember the most is that moment where we shared something, you know, where we shared a meal, where we shared a law, where we shared a cup of tea, where we shared how we feel about you know that particular building that you know just striped in some way, or how beautiful the environment was, is is that shared experience that makes it so special.

SPEAKER_02 11:56

I yes, experience and culture. I totally understand that. And I think that um what we remember is the way we we felt, isn't it? You know, once we're with when we've met somebody new and we're in their company, and it could be dinner, it could be anything, you just remember those feelings, don't you? That yes, you know, this is somewhere where I'm quite happy, where I'm quite happy to be. And so, as I said earlier, um, are there many countries that you go to? Are there many different countries? Oh yes, okay, tell us about that.

SPEAKER_00 12:26

Yeah, so I I I have to be honest, I have just kind of you know started doing and exploring a little bit more with the tango and the traveling. Yes. So how exciting though.

SPEAKER_02 12:39

So, what can I just go back then? What made you decide to do that? You know, I think that right, that's that's the road I'm going to go down. So, what made you there must have been a decision at some point where you thought, this is what I'm going to do, this is what I really enjoy doing, so I'm going to do it a bit more.

SPEAKER_00 12:55

I think again, my at the heart, I am an explorer and I I I feel like I'm inspired when I see different people, different places, when I get to know and taste everything that is different. So I guess Tango just introduces a wonderful opportunity. And it's easy to go to a new place on your own.

unknown 13:22

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 13:22

Because you know that you're you know for sure that you will meet some people that you already met before, and then you will meet other people. And then you yeah, you kind of know that you probably will have some other time together that allows you to explore the the culture. You know, sometimes when I go just for holiday, let's say with my family, I think I was uh telling earlier about this, and and you know, I had a great time. I have a great time to go somewhere on holiday uh with my family and explore the country, but I'm always have this feeling, oh I'm missing something. And what I'm missing is just dancing. I I miss dancing, you know, to make a complete experience for me, you know. So I I really because the the the most incredible and exciting thing for me in my life is dancing, tango. And so when I go to places and explore, I just want to also dance because it just elevates my experience.

SPEAKER_02 14:28

Yeah, I love that. Um there was a question I was going to ask you on the back of that now, and I've forgotten it. Is there when you go um when you go, you know, as you come away and on reflection when you get back, is there a specific transformation that you feel that you feel you've had by being there and doing what you've done?

SPEAKER_00 14:51

Yes, that's a beautiful question. Yes, I I feel like so it goes back a little bit to understand what tango is, and for me personally, tango is it's not just a dance. You know, you have the music and you dance and you dance to the rhythm. The whole idea of tango is based on connection. That whole dance is based on connection. So when people enter a space like that, and we call it melonga, you enter a sacred space where you seek and find connection with another human being. Beautiful. And they can be a stranger. So, really, it's for me, it's the most spiritual dance there is because it's it's that based on that connection, it's connecting on a deeper level. It's not just you know, what steps you know, and let's do it, you know, it's it's more about connecting on a deeper level through the music and through the dance. Yeah. So, you know, I when I come back, I come back very tired because in a good way. I I have been dancing day and night, day and night, and you you know, like after three, four days of doing that, you get tired. But I also come back charged. Because I I just and I cannot explain what it is. It's it's like you feel like you've been fed but it feeds your soul, doesn't it? It feeds when you nerve stuff on the sound. Yes, yes, yeah, you've been fed on a soul level, and yeah, it can be really beautiful and very spiritual. And you know, I remember dancing three o'clock in the night, and the the energy of that is that everybody is imagine like everybody's connecting on that level, on that spiritual level, and the whole room is connecting with that, and the energy is like the the energy in the room is just so incredible. You can just taste it, and I feel like this is this is like tasting a magic. Yeah, it's a magic.

SPEAKER_02 17:07

It's tangible. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Wow, I love that. I I want to be, I want to be part of the group. Um yeah, so transformation. I think with something like that, it's like any kind of travel really, especially prolonged. I don't just mean a holiday really, but any kind of travel, no matter what may include, there's always some kind of transformation from that. You know, there's always something that we learn from it, and then it always, it nearly always makes us want to do it again. You know, we come away with that feeling of whatever that feeling is for you. Um, but we always want to do it again. And this is what I say to anybody I work with around travel who've not who's not done it yet and are a bit not you know not confident. Once you do it, and everyone's exactly the same, once you do it, you want to do it again. Of course, that's the same with you, with you know, with tango, isn't it? You know, once you've been there, once you've done that. Um, and so how did you decide um that tango is going to be the one thing that you'll never give up? I mean, I think I can guess the answer to this, but I can tell you something you'll never give up.

SPEAKER_00 18:14

Yeah, yeah, well, I guess I can tell a little bit of story how I how I started it. Yes. I started it, it insp it was inspired by a movie called Ascent of the Women. And you know, the the movie is not about Tango, but there is one scene in that movie that where a blind man invites a woman to dance Tango. Okay, and she just you know blossoms in in in his arms, as we say it, you know. She just she's very shy in the beginning, she's not certain of herself, and then she's like laughing and giggling, and she's in her element and she's in her femininity, and he is also in in his masculine element as well. So, you know, the collide of two energies, it was mesmerizing that scene, and I, you know, it was like I when I watched that, I just said to myself, I want to do this. I want to one day I will do this. And then, of course, a lot of a few years passed and I didn't do it. And then it was my 30th birthday. Right. Where you know, I said, What can I give to myself for my 30th birthday? And I wanted it to be meaningful, so I booked my myself into a block of tango classes, so I don't get out of it. And I was very lucky because our teacher was was, I guess, himself very big explorer and brave person. And after free classes, he invited us. He says, There is a tango club in London. I would love to invite you. I will be there. Come. And I said, Oh my god, I want to see what it's like to be in a tango club. Like, I had never been to a tango club, and I didn't have much expectations. I went there and I was sitting and watching how people dance and they look beautiful, and again, soaking that energy in. And then somebody came to me and said, Would you like to dance? I had three classes, I don't know how to dance, and then but he was very such a beater. I said, You'll be fine. Let's just do it, you know. And I was in that moment, I just remember that I I was a little bit nervous in the beginning, and once the music starts playing, when I once I get into this embrace, I relaxed, and I relaxed to such an extent where I just closed my eyes and I immersed into the music, and I honestly don't know how I danced, what I was doing, I was doing, I was dancing with him without knowing all the steps that he was leading me into. And I also remember that there was a moment where everything disappeared. Like I it just the floor, the people around me, like I felt like I transcended into another space. And you know, it was such a blissful, incredible experience experience. And after that experience, I just said, you know what? I don't I don't care how long this takes or how you know, whatever it takes, I I can never give up on something like that.

SPEAKER_02 21:25

Yeah, no, it sounds magical.

SPEAKER_00 21:27

I I have to do it, yes, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 21:30

I mean, you know, just that so you know, you you so this like encompasses your soul, you love this. Can you bring that into the work that you do with the women you work with?

SPEAKER_00 21:45

I do that, yes, yes, yes, because you know, again for me tango, so dancing tango has really required me to go deeper and connecting deeper with my body because as a dancer I needed to learn how to move, how to move with fluidity, flexibility, with less tension in my body, and I I wanted to be that dancer that just dances really fluidly and without no effort. And that really required me to really connect with everything inside of me, everything inside of me. And and I developed a practice that I have been doing for a couple of years now, where I'm just listening to my body, not really pushing or forcing anything, I'm just listening to my body and and listening through a subtle movement what it tells me. And um, and as part of that practice, I also experience peace. Yeah, you know, because when I when I get into my body, I don't think about anything anymore. I can be very stressed and then the then the minute I drop into my body I let go of everything because it just feels it feels safe to be in your body and so I I really experience this idea of safety and to really tap into your body as a as a safety that just allows you to breathe to be to rest to digest and so when I work with women the idea of that safety within yourself is absolutely the most important aspect of my work because when a woman feels safe and again I compare this with being in that in the tango embrace it's you're you're being held you're being supported you're feeling safe you can trust and then a woman can really blossom when she's in that absolutely so and she feels like she is a woman yes she she is feminine energy yeah exactly feminine energy so so yeah so my work is is really around that you know but but you know again that I developed this idea that you know oftentimes we require that safety from other people but we can also give that safety to ourselves and you know once we connect with the body the body becomes that very best friend that yeah we need at any moment.

SPEAKER_02 24:25

Yeah yeah lucky women that you work with that you go through that with them so I think that's that that's just uh beautiful so I mean I think this is a bit of a moot point really but why is tango so important to you?

SPEAKER_00 24:41

I think we've kind of covered that really haven't we I think the bottom the bottom line at the bottom line is that it just brings magic into my life you know I feel like you know how many women dream of living through a Cinderella story. Yeah you know and every time I dance I go through a Cinderella story I live through a Cinderella story. There is this magic that is surrounded there's the energy in the room there is I mean you know Tango brings a lot of really old fashioned traditions back into the society into that room that we are in where a a woman is invited she's a following you know and she's taken by the hand you know by the by the leader to the dance floor yeah and then they dance they hold each other for a minute and then they bring them back to that seat you know how often that happens in a regular in our regular lives and I feel like this is such a magical experience that we have such a privileged experience where this is absolutely natural absolutely like and man plays a role of protector a savior yes and some somebody that you know takes care of her in that moment. And there are nowadays we have women leaders as well so they like to lead as well but I feel like there is a different feeling when a man does that for a woman you know when they are taking care of a woman it's just such a very different feeling and and and I think that because of that Tango has healed so many people you know unconsciously because it's just have such beautiful qualities.

SPEAKER_02 26:45

Yeah it just sounds like an organic it sounds organic you know the way that that healing would take place absolutely because you know when when we let go and this is where a place where we let go all of all of it.

SPEAKER_00 27:00

Yes I think that's something magical can happen in that in that in that space.

SPEAKER_02 27:06

Oh I love that yes I love I just love everything you've just talked about it's uh it's it's wonderful and I really you know I'm really pleased for the women that you work with that um they get to uh experience that side of things from you as well so where can if anybody knows for the listeners where can they get in touch with you so what I'll do is if you tell me if you say on the podcast now where they can get in touch with you and then what we'll do is I'll put all of those links in the show notes so that it's all there they just click on a link and it takes them to you.

SPEAKER_00 27:40

So but where can they find you thank you Terry so I have a website which is my name and surname is yevakelps.com and you can also find me I am on Facebook I have an Instagram account I have recently started a YouTube channel as well so you can find me there too. Yeah it's just my name and my surname that it's very easy if you just put it's not a lot of you know relationship coaches because it has my surname and and my name so I think they will be able to find me.

SPEAKER_02 28:19

Yeah no and like I say I'll put everything in the show notes anyway with the links so that they can find you quite easily then so this has been an absolutely gorgeous conversation. I've absolutely loved this so thank you so much for joining me today and that's the end of the episode for today so thank you everybody for listening and we'll see you next time on Wonderless Diaries.