No Pillz with Gordon McGhee

Can These 6 Tips Save Your Marriage? Ep 74

• Gordon McGhee • Season 2 • Episode 74

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Want a vibrant, fulfilling marriage?  In this episode of The No Pills Podcast, Gordon McGee shares 6 crucial tips to cultivate a strong and healthy relationship. Don't let your marriage fall apart – learn practical steps to protect it from intruders and foster a lasting love. 

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In 3, 2, 1. Welcome back, beloved. This is Gordon McGee from The No Pills podcast, love fully scripted, and today six tips to have a healthy marriage. Who doesn't want to have a healthy marriage? This is why you clicked on the thumbnail to here we are and we need to go through these. Tips to help you have a really vibrant, lovely, fruitful flower, full delightful marriage. Without further ado, let's go. Right here's how a married couple can maintain a healthy marriage. First thing we wanna do is cultivate love. In respect, spouses should respect each other. I know what I'm saying is so simple, but sometimes be honest. You lose the respect in the marriage. You lose the respect for one another. Your words are not sprinkled with love and respect anymore. You wanna cultivate love, cultivate it France, and confidence and avoid estrangement. Mm. What does that look like? Practically? Don't work too much. Okay. Don't always be a part. Sometimes for money, sometimes for money, we will sacrifice our marriages for money. We will sacrifice our marriages. We will put our marriages at risk, if not wholly sacrifice them just for a few little bit in pieces of coin. Beloved, let me remind you that when we die, you can't take the money with you. So even if you take some of that money with you in a divorce, be sure that when you die, it's not coming with you. It will not be with you in the resurrection of the just or the resurrection of the unjust, I promise you. And whatever NU number is on that coin or on that piece of paper or in your bank account, I promise you it is not worth your marriage. It's not worth your children, not worth your family period. Next tip. You have to be intentional with your words, right? We we're not just saying, oh, I wish we, uh, were in love. Oh, I love you. No, no, no. Those are just your words, but your actions need. To follow your words if they are kind words. Uh, if you have mean words, we don't need mean actions to follow mean words. All right? So you wanna cultivate love, friends, and confidence, no secrets. Come on. You, you, you want your spouse to know that you adore them, that you love them for who they are, for who they're trying to become. Who they're trying to be. You are there to encourage them to better themselves to, to better their health, to better their life, to better their spirituality. You are there. You do not want to embrace and cultivate estrangement. Some people stay at work so they just don't have to come home. Am I right? Come on, talk to me. We're getting right into it, right? You're avoiding the dis, the hard, difficult discussions and you are just not cultivating love. Listen, when you cultivate in the natural world, you have to break up hollow hard ground. Follow ground. You have to go and maybe get tools to break up that soil, to break up that ground. You gotta get oxygen in there and let it breathe, and you have to plant the seeds and dig the holes. You have to water it, you have to weed it. When I say cultivate love, this is what I mean in the natural sense, as it is in a natural world. So it must be in the spiritual world, so you have to remove all the weeds that are gonna take away and, and, and, and suck nutrients from your plant of love. The pornography come on, the secrets. The hasty words. The accusatory spirit. Come on. All those things that are just sucking the, the distrust that are just, just sucking all the vitality, all the deep needed minerals and nutritional values from the soil that the plant needs to live and grow. You've got to do that in the emotional world. Next tip, you want to create a positive home atmosphere. Okay. You have to be intentional about this. You wanna make the home a haven filled with tender. Thoughtfulness, peace and joy. You want to bring heaven to earth in the home. You want to be breathing the atmosphere of heaven. Friends, this is no small task or small feat. First thing you wanna do to accomplish this in the home, you want to practice and let the law of love as described in the 10 Commandments, to be your, to be your by word, to be the rule of the home. The home life. Put the 10 commandments on your wall. They, they define how to love God with all your heart, mind, and soul, and how to love thy neighbor as thyself. That should be your first, your the first rules should be right there with, with the, with the 10 commandments of God, right? The moral law of God. Spoken with God's own mouth, written with God's own finger, and then. I want to give you 10 practical rules, tips to be able to create a positive atmosphere in the home. Okay? The first being, praying together. You wanna pray together. The family that prays together stays together. Isn't that what they say? It's true. Friends prayer. First tip, next tip. To create a positive home atmosphere, you want to be kind. It should go without saying, but I'm saying it because there's somebody who has slipped away from kindness that, that you get complacent, you get too comfortable. You, you, you begin to take advantage. You know, you don't appreciate, and your words are, are, are rash. Your words are not mingled with kindness and encoded and love. You want to be helpful. I know why we believe in gender roles. Some of us, which is fine. You know what I mean? I'm a fan of it. But there can be overlap. There's nothing wrong with just helping out, helping your spouse in their daily duties is okay. There's not a sin in that. There's nothing wrong with that. Hey, let me, let me, let me help you fold the clothes. Let me help you wash the dishes. Do you need help changing the oil? Do you need help getting in the. We, we can do this. Friends, there's not a rule that says you cannot help your spouse with, with daily duties and tasks, and I'm not even talking about children. Next tip, to create an atmosphere in heaven that is in the home, that is heavenly sharing is caring friends. Let's share the love, let's share the food. Let's share the blankets. Oh man. Let's share. Sharing is something that we just overlook A lot of times. We teach these things and promote these things to our children, but we, we as adults, don't practice these things. Next tip, say, please say thank you for next two tips for you right there. Say please and say thank you. You would be surprised how the atmosphere in your home will change if you are intentional about saying, please. Thank you. Next tip. Snuggle off in France. A lot of snuggling. Let's get close. Let's smell one another. Let's get those good hormones going on. Let's, let's, let's become one flesh. Let's stay united. Let's stay familiar with one another. Some of us are a little, uh, too serious. Some of us can be, uh, too grumpy or grumpy can be all about business. No pleasure. All we want to do is provide for the family. Don't talk to me. Don't, but it's all right to laugh friends, it's all right to laugh often. We want to create this atmosphere, this healthy atmosphere, and we need to laugh often. We need to have fun. Nothing wrong with having fun, not a sin to have fun, friends. And lastly, the thing that will help keep your atmosphere in your home, that of a heavenly nature, is for both you, your husband and wife, and the children, if there are any to be planning for heaven. Hmm. This will keep the right perspectives and the right priorities set before. The home when you're planning for heaven. Our next tip, avoid strife and selfishness. Some of us are looking for strife. Some of us married folks are looking for beef. We are look looking for the fisticuffs. Okay? Verbally, mentally, God forbid some of y'all physically have mercy on you and selfishness. Selfishness is a tough one. We just we're just naturally geared that way. Self preservation is all we know until we get knocked in the head by the gospel, by love. Until we find Jesus, we need to avoid strife, friends and selfishness, refrain from arguing. Hmm. And prioritize each other's happiness. You know, friends, I had the. Unfortunate, but yet God worked it out to be beneficial experience of seeing my wife take her last breaths. And I remember telling her in that moment as she was transitioning, because I was sitting there thinking like, man, every argument we ever had, every disagreement we ever had, it was a waste of time because it didn't mean anything in that moment other than it took away. From the good times I could have been having with my wife not knowing when she was gonna die. Friends, I want you to think about this and remember this. You're mad about dishes not being washed. Something didn't happen with the kids. Something, some clothes didn't get folded, something. I get it. It's frustrating. Right tone wasn't spoken. I get it. I'm not co-signing any of these activities. If you ask somebody to do something for the hundredth time, I understand your frustrations. I get it. I was married for almost 20 years. I get it. But the time you spend mad at each other, the time you spend not getting alone is taking a time from the, is taking off the hours, minutes, years, seconds from the time that has been allotted. You both, and you don't know how long that is. You don't know if that's a few minutes or a few days. Friends wake up. Grow up. Don't forget, death is waiting for one of you. If, if not both of you at the same time. Whoever's gonna go first is gonna leave that other person behind and Lord let there be no regrets. Hmm. Don't waste time arguing. Friends. Don't waste time being selfish, making it all about you all the time.'cause it's not if married couples would just put each other first, equally putting each other's first. Putting each other first. What a difference marriage would be. Friends, if you and your spouse would put each other first, what a difference. How different would your marriage be? How different? My next tip for you. You wanna maintain a Christian home? What do I mean? Invite Christ into the home. Friends. Let God's love guide your relationship. And follow God's plan for marriage. None is foolishness. The world is doing. Don't bring anybody into your marriage. Don't, don't, don't, don't be involved in a marriage. We just there for money to take advantage there to abuse somebody else. No, no. Do it God's way. God so loved the church that he gave himself for her men. So love your wives as God loved the church. Women respect and reverence, your husband. Come on, do it God's way. You can't improve on that. Invite Christ into the home. Friends, when Christ comes into the home, he will sweep it. He will garnish it. He will lavish it with heavenly gifts. But Will Christ is not invited in. You better believe the demon of animosity, the de demon of jealousy. The demon of contention will take a bold will take residence. When Christ is not there, all the other fallen spirits will they show up the the demons of argument, discontent. They show up friends lying, the demon of lust. They show up friends because why Christ is not there. Christ is not in the home. So that makes room for the fallen spirits. You need to practice the important virtues. Next tip for you. Friends practice the important virtues, kindness, sympathy, mutual forbearance. These things are essential friends. Forgiveness for both parties, for both spouses. It's okay to be sympathetic. It's o it's okay to be kind. It's okay. These virtues are, are, are, are fine to practice with your spouse. You don't have to be hard on them. We're not drill sergeants with one another. This is not the military. We're running a type ship. We're militant against sin, but mercy do unto others as you would have others do unto you. Practice the gold golden rule in your own home. Be within your own four walls. My last tip for you, fidelity. Hmm. Fidelity. Friends, husbands should be loyal to their marriage vows, wives. Should be loyal to the marriage vows. Friends, no pornography. Let us not have a spirit of flirtation. Let us not have wandering eyes. May we be satisfied with the bosom of our wives and her youth. Let us be, let us be satisfied to drink from our own wells and our own cisterns, and not to let our water run abroad to to, to water other yards in other homes. You must be intentional about guarding your marriage in every aspect. Don't be sharing your business with everybody. Come on, talk to me. Don't be sharing your spouse with anybody. No work wives, no work husbands, let me make it plain for everybody. All, all this social media. Oh yeah. Let me follow you on the gram. Let me do so you can DM me later on in, in secret. Get outta here. You're not being intentional. It is only a matter of time friends. You live that way. You operate your marriage. You operate like that within the confines of your marriage. It will eventually fall apart. It will be penetrated by the enemy. You must keep other people out of your marriage who do not belong. There you are to have eyes for one person, love for one person. Welcome to no pills, no blue pills, no red pill nonsense. You do not need a multiplicity of women. Marriage is a beautiful, beautiful institution. A an institution given to us imperfection. Before there was sin before the fall, and you need to work on your marriage. You need to protect your marriage. It's not just gonna do, it's just not, you know, it is like your home friends. If you want to protect your home, you get firearms, you get, you get a security system. You may hire somebody, you may hire, yeah, you may hire security, you may get dogs. You may. You take active, practical steps to guard your home from an intruder. Same way with your marriage. If you gotta get rid of your smartphone, get rid of your smartphone. If you gotta install, um, some accountability apps, get some accountability apps. If you gotta get to the church and get some accountability from a husband or wife, get get to it. Send loves to breed in secrecy and in darkness. Get the accountability you need, friends, this is how you're gonna protect. Your marriage and have a healthy marriage. You wanna cultivate love and respect. Create a positive home atmosphere, avoid strife and selfishness, maintain a Christian home practice important virtues and practice fidelity. I'm Gordon McGee. This is the No Pills podcast. Love fully scripted, and I'm signing off and I'll catch you next week.