How Gratitude Can Help You Retire Early

Harnessing Gratitude as a Financial Tool: Emotional and Behavioral Benefits

In this episode of The Retire Early Retire Now podcast, host Hunter Kelly explores the often-overlooked emotional side of money, focusing on the impact of gratitude. As Thanksgiving approaches, Hunter explains how gratitude can be a strategic financial tool that helps high-income earning families make better financial decisions, reduce stress, and feel more secure in their financial journey. He identifies three major 'wealth killers': lifestyle creep, comparison syndrome, and fear-based hoarding, and offers practical habits for integrating gratitude into financial planning. The episode encourages listeners to reflect on the positive aspects of their financial accomplishments and challenges them to create a 'money gratitude list' with their loved ones to foster deeper appreciation and contentment.

00:00 Welcome to The Retire Early Retire Now Podcast
00:18 The Emotional Side of Money: Gratitude
01:46 Why Gratitude Matters in Wealth Building
07:13 Three Big Wealth Killers
11:50 Practicing Gratitude in Financial Life
16:16 A Simple Challenge for Thanksgiving
18:05 Closing Thoughts and Final Advice

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Transcript

0:00

And welcome back to The Retire Early Retire Now podcast. I'm your host, hunter Kelly. Certified financial planner and founder of Palm Valley Wealth Management. And if you're new here, this podcast is all about helping high income earning families, make smarter financial decisions. Reduce your stress around money and build a life based on freedom, intention, and purpose. Today's episode is going to be a little bit different. We're gonna talk about more of the emotional side of things, the emotional side of money, and most specifically about gratitude. We have Thanksgiving coming up and what better way, to celebrate that? Then to talk about gratitude and be thankful for what money as a tool has done for us. And I don't wanna necessarily talk about gratitude from a mo motivational standpoint or a poster on the wall angle. We're gonna talk about how gratitude can be a financial tool and a Behavioral advantage because you can save, you can invest, you can earn your way into financial success, but still never feel financially secure. I've met people who have saved millions and millions of dollars, who carry the emotional habits that they built when they only had, uh, only a few thousand dollars, right? And so these, these habits will carry on with you for a lifetime. So if we can start to learn gratitude and use that as a financial tool, we can carry this for hopefully a lifetime. So in today's episode, we're going to unpack why gratitude is not soft, it's strategic, and how it can apply directly to your financial habits, planning, and lifestyle. So before we jump in, if you're liking this podcast, take 10 seconds to go ahead and leave a five star review on your favorite podcasting app. It helps people find this podcast. And support what we have going on here at the Retire Early Retire Now podcast. So to really understand why gratitude matters and wealth building, let me zoom out for a second. And imagine you are climbing a mountain. You're focused on the summit, the next ridge, the next milestone, but you never pause to notice the view. Eventually, the climb stops feeling meaningful. another example, I'm currently training for a half marathon that I'll run actually this Sunday. And it's easy when people are training for these longer races. Not that not half marathon super long. It is longer, probably than most people run. But, when you get into training for marathons or maybe even ultra marathons, it's easy to forget, why you are training. You get caught in your feelings, right? And you never take a second to realize maybe you are. now pring shorter distances or you're hitting the pace that you need to hit, but maybe you're just feeling tired and fatigued because of all the training. and so it's always good to take time to, Appreciate the things that you have accomplished along the way. Not that the end goal isn't important, but it helps you have perspective and money works the same way. So before we go any further, let's take a look at why gratitude is such a powerful anchor in financial life and how it can completely reshape. The way we view progress. So when most people think about financial success, they automatically think about tactical elements, right? We talk A lot about these on the Retire Early Retire Now podcast, right? Income investment returns, savings rates, asset allocation, retirement dates, retirement numbers. Tax strategies, all the mechanical things, and all of those are super important, but the internal game of money is just as important as the external strategies or mechanics. Gratitude impacts behavior through emotional regulation. Studies and behavioral finance show that gratitude helps with people with all sorts of things, such as making better long-term decisions, handling uncertain times more calmly. Reducing impulsive spending, resisting. the urge to keep up with the Joneses and avoid panic selling in times of volatile markets. Gratitude acts as a emotional installation and protects you from being reactive and stressed about money. Ask yourself this question, what has money allowed us or allowed me to experience, protect, or provide that? I haven't acknowledged lately, especially if you are in the season of life that I'm in. you have young kids, you have a busy career, you have a social life and all these sorts of things, and maybe you're doing all the right things. You're saving, what you're supposed to be saving, whether that be in your 401k or brokerage accounts or what have you. You're doing all the right things, but maybe you still feel a little bit behind. It's always a good time or a good thing to take time to ask yourself. This money thing that I'm doing, have I been able to utilize it as a tool to accomplish at least some things throughout the last year, the last month, last week, whatever that may be for you. and having gratitude toward those things I've been able to accomplish. Because thinking about retirement, whether you're retiring early, whether you're retiring late, whether you're retiring at a more traditional age, it's a long time period to build enough wealth for most people to, Be able to be financially independent, right? So unless you are, hitting the lottery or have some sort of novel business idea that the 1% of the 1% of the 1% hit on, likely it's gonna take you 15, 20, 25, 30 years to become financially independent. And so putting your head down and working and. Not taking time to appreciate all the things that you accomplished along the way. seems pretty, pretty bleak to me, right? again, what preemptively made me want to do a podcast about this is, obviously Thanksgiving. And so what a great time to take time. Take a moment and look at the previous six months or. The previous year and what have we done, or been able to do, with what, we've been afforded to through our work and making, this money and being able to experience and provide for my family. And so it's a good time to just take a step back and have gratitude for all of those things that you've accomplished, throughout the year, right? So the awareness alone is powerful. So just having acknowledgement of those things, can give you. a great feeling. Now, if gratitude is the anchor, then there has to be a storm. It's holding us steady through, and there is, There are a few invisible forces that quietly sabotage even incredibly disciplined savers, and most people don't even Notice them until years have passed. Think of them as financial rip current. They pull you without you even realizing. Let's talk about the three big ones. So what are the three big wealth killers? I've done a couple podcast episodes on these, and so you may notice them, or maybe you don't, and you haven't listened and this is the first time. But, the first big one to me is lifestyle creep. Lifestyle creep is when the standard of living increases automatically as your income increases. And you don't set, more aside to, to save and allow yourself to keep up with your income increases, right? So you're not saving enough to. make sure that increase that you got, you're adjusting for it throughout your savings, right? the kicker is you never feel like it's an upgrade. You feel like it has to become the new normal. Gratitude slows the cycle and creates contentment and not complacency, but clarity. if you're showing gratitude for the things that you're accomplishing, with the income that you have, with the wealth that you have built, it is easier. To not feel like every time you get a raise, you have to up your level of spending to the point where now I can't save enough to keep up with the income that I'm bringing in or to re replace that new income that I'm bringing in. it allows you to say, Hey, these are the things that I value. These are the things that I want to accomplish. My income is already allowing me to do that, so I don't necessarily. Need to increase my spending to such a place that, I don't need to increase my spending to a point where I'm not able to start replacing that income with my wealth that I'm building through retirement planning and things of that nature. Number two is the comparison syndrome. So keeping up with the Jones, right? So comparison quietly convinces you that Your progress is actually falling apart. and so it's easy to, and I've talked about this a couple times on podcasts, but it's easy to go, Hey, my neighbor, bought this new truck, or they've d done these trips, or this or that. And you feel like you're falling behind, right? Because you're not able to do that. But you don't know your neighbor's situation. You don't know if they have a trust fund. You don't know if they actually make way more money, than you think they make, right? You don't know if they didn't have the same amount of debt that you had, coming into the, the workforce and all those sorts of things. And so you comparing yourself to. something that isn't actually apples to apples maybe is apples to oranges. just doesn't make a lot of sense. And having gratitude can shift that lens from an external scorekeeping, side of things to, being appreciative to, your internal values. and so it's my journey, my priorities, my timeline, and it allows you to say no. Right. if there are certain things that you have a priority, when you feel the urge to keep up with the Joneses, if it doesn't fit into that alignment, then it's easy to say no. It's not always easy to say no, but it allows you, it gives you permission to say no, right? Because it's going to push back my timeline or it's not within my. My priorities, this is not part of the journey that I want to take. Number three, fear-based hoarding or over saving. this is common for a lot of high income earners that are wanting to retire early or maybe they grew up in a way where, money was not necessarily easy to come by, when they were growing. And so you become masters of accumulating wealth and, but you struggle to transition to enjoying that wealth. So gratitude can help you transform money from a protection, only sort of deal. To a purpose also. learning to give, right? being grateful for what you have, understanding that you are taking care of you are secure. Having gratitude in that and being able to serve maybe a charity or your kids or, whatever else is important to you, right? Because, you've done. that work. And so you, you understand that, hey, I am taken care of. I have gratitude, I have thankfulness that I've worked hard, I've saved all this money, I've built this wealth. and now it's not, a scarcity mindset. It's more of an abundance mindset. The more I help people, the more I will get that in return. Alright? Alright. So we've identified the riptides, the things that can secretly or quietly erode our wealth. Lifestyle creep comparison, keeping up with the Joneses and that fear-based hoarding that, that scarcity mindset. And so here's the good news. Every tide can be countered with the right stroke. So now the question How do we intentionally practice gratitude in a way that it shows up in our bank accounts, not just in our words. Let me give you a few rhythm building habits that can help. So number one, value based spending filter. I talk about this a ton when we talk about budgeting and things of that nature, but before spending ask, is this aligned with what matters most to my life? And if you wanna back up even further, you need to have that conversation with yourself, with your spouse, with your family. What are the things that. Matter the most to us. Where, what is our standard of living? How do we spend money? Is it from a charity standpoint? is it from, Hey, I wanna build wealth so we can retire early standpoint. what, how should we be spending money? Right? And this brings. You identity, this brings you, the ability to make decisions a little bit more clearly, a little bit more educated, because it's based off of the things that we have identified that are the most important to us. And again, it gives us the permission to say no to certain things. And it gives us the ability to go, okay, I did make a mistake, right? We're off track. Here's the standard to get back on track with our spending to achieve our goals. Number two, annual return on joy review. So once a year, look at your top spending categories and ask yourself, what uh, did this. Category, produce meaningful joy, connections, memories, not just at what the cost. So number two, your annual return on joy review. So once a year. this is a great time of year to do this. look at your top spending categories and ask what produce the most meaningful joy, connection or memories, not just what costs the most. So it's easy if you have a credit card, a debit card that you use most consistently. You can actually filter all of this. if you're a parent like I am with the young kids that eat a lot, just go ahead and swipe away the grocery bill. Right. But look at those categories. is it travel? is it, some sort of hobby that you enjoy? Right? for me it's archery. is that what brought me most joy? Or is it the trips with my family, or is it this, or is that, is it the charity, that I gave to? What, about your spending gave you most, most joy? And then based off of that, is it aligned with your values? Right? And so a lot of people. we'll use it this in a different way, right? They'll say, Hey, look at your calendar, right? If you say your family's the most important, if you say, building this business is the most important thing to you, whatever that may be, does your calendar represent those things? Right? And this is just another way of doing that. But as from a money standpoint, so I say spending time with my spouse and going on trips or dates or this or that, is most important to me, but does my wallet. Or does my bank account reflect that? Right? so this is a good, practice, a good exercise to review with yourself or with your spouse, whatever your situation is, right. Number three, gratitude driven investing. So grateful investors focus on long-term benefits of compounding rather than chasing timing, bragging rights, and market alpha. really here. Make sure that, you look at how you did in the market this year, not necessarily from a return standpoint, obviously that's very important, but were you chasing the shiny object? Were you chasing gold as it was running up? Were you, were you chasing Bitcoin, as it was going up, or crypto as it was going up? were you missing out on some of those returns because you're chasing it and you're too late? Right. Are you chasing Nvidia or these other tech stocks, as they go up, or are you, more focused on long term in the things that you can actually control, such as income? how much you're saving, you're spending and things of that nature. All of these things and all of these habits sound great conceptually, but they become truly transformative when you experience them. So since we're in the Thanksgiving season. I want to give you a simple challenge that will make all of this real and not theoretical. Sit down with your spouse, your partner, your kids, your parents, whatever that may be, and make a money gratitude list. List out at least five things money has made possible that you are grateful for. And I don't want this to become a money is the most important thing. I want people to realize that money is a tool, right? You've worked hard, whether that's working your way up in your company, whether it's coming in as a, entry level employee and now you're a director or manager, whatever. or you build a business to a certain point, or you've graduated at residency. And, and now you're an attending physician. You've worked hard, right? But here are some examples if you need a spark. maybe you're grateful for a safer or more joyful home. More flexibility of work, vacations, experiences, health, wellness, Whatever that may be for you. when gratitude shifts from a thought into spoken expression, it becomes integrated. And that's where the transformation happens, right? expressing that to your spouse, your kids, your loved ones. makes it different. And so take time to sit down, make that list, discuss that with your family, discuss that with your spouse. And I, I promise you, it'll make a big difference if you do this exercise. You may be surprised on what shows up on your spouse's list, on your kids' list. you may have clarity, appreciation, contentment, maybe even relief. And once you see your money through a different lens. It's very hard to go back to the old one. So as we wrap up, let me leave you with a few closing thoughts and a quick ask If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone who needs to hear it. Especially someone who's always chasing that next financial milestone. And if you haven't taken the 10 seconds, please leave a five star review. it helps tremendously If you want help building a financial plan that includes both abundance and enjoyment, head to Palm Valley wm.com. Schedule a call with me. Would love to work with you. I'd love to have that conversation if it makes sense. And I'm Hunter Kelly. Thanks for listening. And remember, true wealth is not measured only by what we accumulate, but by how deeply we appreciate what we already have. This podcast is for educational purposes only. It's not meant to be financial or investment advice. Please do not make decisions based on this podcast alone. Please seek professional help when making decisions about your own situation. I.