#36: "Look for the Helpers" - A New Year's Resolution for Long COVID

Happy 2025! In this special New Year’s episode of Long COVID MD, Dr. Zeest Khan reflects on an invaluable piece of wisdom from Mr. Rogers: “Look for the helpers.”

Navigating Long COVID is anything but straightforward, but this timeless advice serves as a guiding principle. Dr. Khan breaks it down into three actionable steps to help you identify the assistance you need, avoid detractors, and—perhaps the hardest part—learn to receive help with grace.

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Transcript

Podcast Transcript: Episode 36 - "Look for the Helpers"

[00:00:01]
Hello and welcome or welcome back to Long COVID MD.

[00:00:05]
I'm Dr. Zeast Khan. I am a board-certified and licensed physician who is a full-time patient with Long COVID. I am here to help explain your symptoms and help identify ways that you can utilize the existing healthcare system for your benefit.

[00:00:21]
Today, I want to wish you a very happy 2025 and talk about a New Year’s resolution that I am making—and one that I encourage you to make as well, even if you’re not the type of person who typically makes New Year’s resolutions.

[00:00:38]
I do, and at minimum, I take January as an opportunity to reflect back on the past year: identify the challenges that I’ve overcome, what has worked, what things I’m going to try to avoid doing in the future, and set some intentions for this next year and the next chapter in my life.

[00:01:00]
This year, I am dedicated to following the advice of Mr. Rogers.

[00:01:07]
Mr. Rogers, when asked what advice he would give a child who felt scared because of a dangerous situation, said, "Look for the helpers." There’s always someone willing to help. He said he got that advice from his own mother when he read the news as a child and started becoming afraid of the things that were happening in the world around him.

[00:01:34]
Like a lot of advice that is short and simple, this advice is not necessarily easy to implement. I see three steps or actions that we have to take to implement our ability to look for the helpers effectively.

Step 1: Identify the Help You Need

[00:02:29]
To look for the helpers, the first part of the puzzle is to be able to identify the help that we need.

If we’re in an emergency, like trying to escape a burning building, our ultimate goal is to get out and get to safety. In Long COVID, our needs are more complex—it’s almost like standing outside your home that’s falling apart and thinking, What do I do now? There’s no one rescuer who’s going to carry us out of this emergency. We’re going to need a team of helpers to meet our medical, emotional, and practical needs.

Take time to reflect:

• What are your most pressing physical symptoms that need immediate care or deeper exploration?
• What are your emotional needs? How are you processing your grief?
• What are your practical needs? How hard is it to get meals, clothing, or get through a workday?

Get precise about your needs so that when help comes your way, you’re able to recognize and use it.

Step 2: Avoid the Detractors

[00:04:36]
Detractors are, unfortunately, everywhere.

If you’re in a burning building, you’re going to look for someone who looks like a firefighter—not a nosy neighbor or someone denying the fire exists. Similarly, avoid detractors who:

• Deny or diminish your condition (e.g., online trolls or dismissive medical professionals).
• Use inflammatory language to provoke anger (e.g., social media clickbait).

Remember: You have a legitimate condition, and you require healthcare. Do not waste your time engaging with people who won’t or can’t help. Instead, focus on finding helpers who can meet your needs, even in small ways.

Unfortunately, detractors can include influential people—public decision-makers, people with large platforms, or even some medical professionals. If you engage, do so thoughtfully and with intention.

Step 3: Learn to Receive Help

[00:10:16]
Once you’ve identified what help looks like and filtered out detractors, the final step is learning how to accept help. For those of us used to being the helper, this can feel uncomfortable or vulnerable.

• Recognize that you are not of less value than you were before you fell ill. You deserve help.
• Accept help graciously and remember that allowing others to help often makes them feel good too.

Help can come in many forms:

• A clear "yes" to help that aligns with your needs.
• A gentle "no" to help that doesn’t fit, while keeping that offer in mind for the future.
• A willingness to revisit offers and reach out when you’re ready.

Closing Thoughts

[00:14:57]
I’m dedicated to amplifying the voices of helpers. That’s my goal with this podcast: to identify people who can help, engage with them, and invite them here so that you can better recognize what help looks like when you experience it.

Thank you for listening and being part of this community. Let’s enter 2025 with hope, intention, and grace.

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