Ep #136 When Your Child Says 'I Hate You': The Surprising Path to Deeper Connection

So you know that gut-punch feeling when someone says they don't like you? Or when your sweet little angel screams "I HATE YOU!" during a tantrum? Talk about emotional whiplash! Today I'm diving into this ultra-relatable parenting challenge in this episode, and trust me - it's the pep talk we all desperately need.

What You'll Discover in This Episode

• Why someone saying they hate you is actually NEUTRAL until you decide what it means (mind=officially blown, right?!)
• The exact thought patterns that turn your kid's tantrum words into your emotional meltdown (spoiler: we're doing it to ourselves, guys!)
• My embarrassingly real story about former friends who—quite literally—couldn't stand me anymore (and how it transformed me from a people-pleasing pretzel into the parent I am today)
• The STEER method that will SAVE YOUR SANITY the next time your sweet angel looks you dead in the eyes and says they wish they had a different mom (been there, bought the t-shirt!)

Episode Highlights

[00:02:30] My humbling journey through friendship breakups and what they taught me about unconditional love (it was the BEST awful experience of my life!)

[00:08:45] The life-changing realization: someone saying "I hate you" is just... words. That's it! (Mind. Blown.)

[00:13:20] Why your kids are 100% allowed to have their opinions about your parenting—even when those opinions make you want to hide in the pantry with chocolate

[00:17:40] How to use STEAR when your 8-year-old is staging a full rebellion against bedtime (complete with dramatic declarations about your parenting abilities!)

[00:22:15] The secret science of mirror neurons and why you FEEL your kid's emotions (but don't actually have to absorb them—hallelujah!)

[00:27:50] The counterintuitive trick: feeling COMPASSION for your tiny dictator when they're mid-meltdown (sounds impossible—I promise it's not!)

[00:32:10] The ultimate parenting superpower: being totally okay when your decisions make your kids temporarily despise you 

Connect Method Parenting FTW

When your child screams "I HATE YOU!" during a tantrum, it's not actually about you. It's about THEM and their big feelings that they don't know how to handle yet. But here's the magic: when you stay regulated instead of diving into the emotional dumpster fire with them, you're teaching them something INCREDIBLE about emotional regulation.

Remember: The moments when your child likes you least are often the moments they NEED you most! ❤️

💡 Truth Bomb: "The less you fear being disliked, the more freely you'll show up as your best self, which will change the way you parent and the way you're able to show up for your child when they're completely dysregulated."

I want to hear from YOU! DM on IG (@connectmethodparenting) and tell me about your "I hate you" moments—how did you handle it? What worked? 

Sending you mountains of love and patience, Andee

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