Let's Stop Arguing About Terms And Start Serving People

We talk about diagnoses and labels, why terminology keeps changing, and why no single phrase fits every person or family. We share a better way forward for churches: focus less on the “right term” and more on knowing people, offering real accommodations, and pointing everyone to Jesus. 
• why disability access matters and why many families still feel unseen 
• how labels and diagnoses can help without becoming identity 
• person-first language versus identity-first language and why preference varies 
• why God is the ultimate definer while roles and diagnoses can still be true descriptors 
• why churches do not need a diagnosis to serve someone well 
• practical examples like buddies, sensory supports, and alternative seating 
If you want to dive deeper on your own, you can check out the indispensable people blog or my books on Amazon called The Indispensable Kid or Gospel Accessibility and the Indispensable People. 

Transcript

Why Disability Access Matters

SPEAKER_00 0:02

Hey, hey, my name is Tracy Coral, and welcome to Indispensable People. I'm a pastor, a teacher, a missionary, a mom, a wife, and I believe that every person should have access to the gospel so that they can know Christ, grow in him, and serve him with the gifts that he has given. Over 65 million Americans have a disability. That's 15 to 20% of every community. And over 85% of those individuals do not attend church. 90% of pastors believe that they are a disability-friendly church, but only 20% of parents and families agree. Let's dive deep into hard topics, big questions, perceptions, stereotypes, and so much more.

Diagnoses, Labels, And Changing Terms

SPEAKER_00 0:54

Names, labels, titles. Oh my. Welcome to this episode of Indispensable People, where we're going to talk about the hard topic of diagnoses as labels, labels as who we are, what defines us, what is decided of who we are, and how do we look at the diagnoses and what they tell us. So recently I have been reading a whole lot and seeing a whole lot of people talking about their labels as their diagnosis. And this has been a long lasting conversation. This isn't something new. We have gone from titles like Mentally Retarded, which is completely faux pas and against all thoughts and languages today. And then you have autistic or a person who is autistic. You have labels and choices and ways to decide how to speak of a person. So you've gone through years and years ago where, you know, terms would be used in incorrect ways, which have led to changing of terms and coming up with the uh person first uh language. And now people who are choosing to use their disabilities as their kind of definer or their part of them of their title of who they are. And here's the thing: so many times I travel to churches, and when I'm doing church trainings, the question is what's the right terminology? And here's the thing it depends on the person. Every person sees and understands their disability in different ways. Some people don't even like to call it a disability. Some people want to call it a different ability. So I was reading an article, or I it might have even been a Facebook post yesterday of another person who I highly respect in the Christian special needs world, which again, special needs, some people don't want that. I I watched a video of a gentleman who went to another country and they call it special rights. And he's like, from now on, I won't call it special needs. It's people with disabilities have special rights. So again, we go back to what's the right terminology? Where do we go with this? And here's the thing in the church realm, I'm not so much concerned with a diagnosis and a title, right? Those things come in much more important whenever you're considering schools and services and IEPs and or the medical field where you know you need to have medical charges and diagnoses that allow for testing and different things that they're, you know, coding is the word that I'm trying to get at. But so but here's the bottom line. The bottom line is every person looks at their diagnosis differently.

Identity, Autism Language, And God

SPEAKER_00 4:20

Some people have a hard time accepting it. And so sometimes they might use different terms just because they're having a hard time accepting it. Some people like very specific terms because they accept it and they know who they are and they're not worried by it or set apart by it. So I I started to say earlier that I was reading a post or a blog or something yesterday, and it was of someone that I highly respect in the Christian disability world, and she was referring to her child, and they explained why they don't use person first language, which would be a person with autism, and that they use they identify with the disability first. So they use the term autistic child. And she said, because it's not the ultimate definer of her child. She said, obviously, the ultimate definer is God. And I have said that a multitude of times through these podcasts and speaking of our son. When we went in for his diagnosis, I said to my husband, Noah's the same Noah when we go in as we come out. His ultimate definer is God. And the diagnosis is an avenue to understand and to help him. And so, in the same realm, she's saying they use the autistic child terminology because it is a piece of her son. It is what explains how his processing and his brain thinks differently. It's not something to hide from, it's not something to be scared of. It again is something that helps people understand who he is, not in like an attribute of who he is. And we don't have to be afraid of the word autism or Down syndrome or whatever the diagnosis might be, because it is not their ultimate definer, right? God is their ultimate definer, but that doesn't mean that people don't call me a mom or a teacher or a pastor or whatever other titles that I have. Those titles don't fully encompass who I am. That's not my ultimate title, but they're not untrue. They're not negative. They are a part of who I am and what it describes that I do or how I function. And so that was her basis of understanding of her son and the terminology that they use. However, I do want to warn you, and I don't think this is terrible. I think it speaks to where people are at, and it is wonderful as you get to know them to kind of dive into understanding the terms that they like to use and why they like to use them. And again, it's not because it's a it's a bad thing, it's because it is how they choose to see themselves, how they choose to operate with their diagnosis in the world. And again, they're gonna be for different reasons. And some are going to be because they are unsure of who they are and what they're doing and where they're at and how to deal with the titles that they've been given or the labels that they've been given, or it's because they're fully confident in who they are and have no problem walking in their diagnosis and understanding their ultimate definer. So there's all different kinds of things, and that's okay. And we don't have to only stand firm on whatever the terminology that we feel comfortable with. But again, we go back to understanding disability in the church and going, those titles aren't super important in the sense that they don't take precedence over knowing a person, right? If a if a diagnosis is

Serving People Without Needing Diagnoses

SPEAKER_00 8:28

an avenue to understanding, helping, and serving a person, we don't necessarily need them. We need to know the attributes of that person. Because if we, even if we say autistic child or child with autism, whatever terminology they utilize, it does not give us the directions on that child because the spectrum of autism is so big. And the same thing with we've spoken of Down syndrome or cerebral palsy, or those look different. You have individuals with cerebral palsy who utilize wheelchairs, who need full assistance to eat, drink, be fed, showered, all of that kind of stuff. And you have fully physically capable individuals who live independently who also have a cerebral palsy diagnosis. The same with Down syndrome. There is a wide range of abilities and accommodations that might be needed within that diagnosis. So it is never more important, more important to have a title than it is to understand the individual specifically and personally. And I say this especially because a lot of individuals will come into our churches and maybe they don't tell us that there's a diagnosis. But we see that there are needs and accommodations. And the thing is, is I don't need a diagnosis to help someone. I don't need someone to tell me that Tommy can't see if I see that there are issues with that. A diagnosis isn't required to give him what he needs. And so a lot of people will say, Well, there's no diagnosis, so how do I get them a buddy? Well, if they need help, you assign them a buddy. And that's okay. There's nothing wrong with that. I always encourage people whenever there is minimal to maybe parents are just finding out a diagnosis, maybe they aren't in that process yet. That there are great questions that you can ask, like, hey, I notice when worship comes on that John covers his ears. Do you notice that? Is that something that do you think earplugs would help him or noise canceling headphones? Or, you know, how do you handle that within your family? And the parent can explain their thought process and how they handle it, or if they experience it themselves. We're not saying, hey, I see that Johnny has autism. We're not trained nor have the ability to give a diagnosis, but we can see where there's a need and accommodate it specifically, right? So maybe Sally has a really hard time sitting in a chair, and so she's kind of flopping all over the place and just having a hard time focusing. I could help Sally with alternative seating and give her a place to sit where she feels nice and comfy, and maybe her body is getting some sensory feedback that helps her. I don't need a diagnosis for that. I can just do that. So I guess where I'm going with this today is that there is less importance on a diagnosis, more importance on the individual than themselves, that it is okay if people want to use different kinds of terminologies, and there are different reasons behind that. And sometimes that might change within the time that you know them because they're on a journey to figuring out who they are, and we get to help them with part with a big part of that by showing them who Jesus is. And that's the best part of this, and that is our goal always. And we don't have to let terminology get in the way of that just because if you heard it said this way one time and this is the reason, we don't have to say to the family, this is the way you should speak of them, this is how you should talk about them. Because it doesn't have to be that way. And we can support people where they're at, we can help them as they grow, and we can always point them to Jesus. And that's how we make sure everyone has the opportunity to know him, to grow in him, and to serve him with the gifts that he has given. I can't claim to have all the answers. I can't claim to know all the things, but here's what we are gonna do we're gonna keep this conversation going. We're gonna make the accessible gospel available to individuals with disabilities in our churches and in our communities so that every person has the opportunity to know Christ, to grow in him, and to serve him with the gifts that he has given.

Keep The Conversation Going

SPEAKER_00 13:14

If you want to dive deeper on your own, you can check out the indispensable people blog or my books on Amazon called The Indispensable Kid or Gospel Accessibility and the Indispensable People.