EPI 63 - Change Can Be Quick or Slow – You Choose

In today’s episode of The Habit Within, I’m diving deep into the two very different but equally powerful ways we create change in our lives: through a Quantum Leap or through Slow, Layered Expansion.

Sometimes we feel ready for a massive, immediate shift. Other times, we need space and time to let our nervous system catch up with our desires. I want to remind you: both ways are real, both ways are valid and both are rooted in self-trust.

I’m also sharing a personal story about a time when slow growth became my greatest gift. Letting go of an old identity wasn’t an overnight thing for me. It was a slow, sometimes uncomfortable process but it led to something so much richer, deeper, and more sustainable than I could have imagined at the time.

In this episode, you’ll hear:

•  Why change can feel so difficult, even when you deeply want it
•  What sets a Quantum Leap apart from Slow Expansion
•  How your nervous system influences your ability to change and grow
•  Why taking your time doesn’t mean you’re failing — it means you're building something real
•  A personal look at my own slow journey of stepping away from an old identity

Whether you’re moving fast or unfolding slowly, this is your reminder: you’re doing it right. Trust the timing of your life. Trust yourself.

✨ Ready for deeper support? I’m offering a free 15-minute call this week to help you get clear on your next steps. Here’s what one listener shared after our conversation:

"I just wanted to write to say a sincere thank you for the time you gave me to speak one to one. I just found your knowledge and insights invaluable. I have actively researched and sought out as much information as I could possibly get my hands on to have an 'intellectual and emotional' shift/epiphany/aha moment. Your research, delivery, as well as your genuine and generous spirit, has shifted something in my core. Your mentor's 'voice' and 'spirit' is something I'd love a daily dose of!

 I think you should write a book; and if you do, I'll edit it for free.
 Warmest regards and all the very best,

 Jeannie XO"

If that kind of shift is what you’re craving, book your free 15-minute call — I would love to support you. [BOOK HERE]

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Transcript

(0:00 - 0:29)

In today's episode, I want to talk about two pathways to change because they show up pretty differently, but they're both extremely valid and both absolutely available to you. If there's something that you really want to do in your life, then yeah, I'm just going to give you these two options in order for you to choose which one makes the most sense for you right now, or better yet why you feel like you want to change. But for some reason you just can't, you can't make that hurdle.

(0:29 - 1:27)

Welcome to the habit within this podcast is for high achieving women, 35 and older who seem to have it all together, but feel like they're constantly running on fumes, struggling to balance it all and losing sight of the woman they used to be. I'm Camille Kinsler, a former physician assistant turned transformational coach, blending science, positive psychology, and a metaphysical approach to habits, health, and vitality. If you've ever asked yourself, why am I so exhausted? Even after a full night's sleep or I feel like I'm juggling so much, but I'm just barely keeping my head above water.

You are in the right place. Each week we'll explore the real reasons behind feeling overwhelmed, trapped in the cycle of overworking and constantly running low on energy and how to break free from the patterns keeping you stuck in survival mode. It's time to stop living on autopilot and to start feeling like yourself again.

(1:28 - 1:49)

Let's dive in. Hello, my beloved Camille Kinsler here, your host. And before I dive into today's episode, I just want to name something that I really feel like is in the collective lately.

That's in the air. And because I'm feeling it, I know that many of you possibly are too. So there's a ton happening in the world right now.

(1:50 - 2:02)

I know that there is a lot happening inside of my home and outside of my home as well. And so I'm assuming the same is going for you. And it is a lot to hold and it is a lot to manage.

(2:02 - 2:48)

And while I know that my response to things are a choice is a choice, to be honest, it's been really hard for me to stay out of the red zone. I am using all of my tools. I'm walking, doing breath work, waking up early to meditate, moving my body, trying not to look at my phone, eating really good, delicious food.

I'm doing the things to come back to myself, come back to center, to feel grounded, to feel in that place of pause where I can really respond to the world versus reacting. But still life seems to just be creeping in around the edges. And again, if I'm feeling it, I know that you might be too.

(2:48 - 3:03)

My clients are feeling it. My friends are feeling it. My family is feeling it.

So I want to say this to you right now that I see you. That you are doing everything right. And that all you need to do is just keep going one foot in front of the other.

(3:04 - 3:25)

And if you feel like you need a moment to exhale or if people around you aren't really understanding you, or if you really don't feel that scene, I would love to connect with you. I've opened up my calendar. You can drop to the show notes in to access it, but you can jump on my calendar for a free 15 minute connection call.

(3:25 - 3:34)

This is a really, really sweet space for you to just simply speak. Tell me what's up in your world. I really want to hear you.

(3:34 - 3:47)

I want to support you. And it's nice to do that. Somebody who is not within your inner circle that doesn't have, yeah, someone who is just a third party just here to listen and see you.

(3:47 - 4:00)

So please take me up on this while I have space. This may I'm taking the summer off so there won't be an opportunity to do it later. So get on my schedule and makes, I would love to meet you and to simply connect with you.

(4:01 - 4:34)

So let's take that collective breath together and dive into today's episode. In today's episode, I want to talk about two pathways to change because they show up pretty differently, but they're both extremely valid and both absolutely available to you. So if there's something that you really want to do in your life, then yeah, I'm just going to give you these two options in order for you to choose which one makes the most sense for you right now, or better yet why you feel like you want to change.

(4:34 - 4:47)

But for some reason you just can't, you can't make that hurdle. So there is the quick path and this is what some people call in their manifestation space or personal growth space. They call this a quantum leap.

(4:47 - 4:57)

It's the moment where you just say, I thought I heard my dog snoring and she is snoring. I hope you can hear it. It's too cute.

(4:57 - 5:10)

But it's that moment where you just say enough is enough that something in your body and your heart, just something that you feel in your bones and you're like, I am over this. I am done. I am moving forward and I'm doing it right now and I'm not looking back.

(5:10 - 5:17)

That's the quantum leap path. That's the very quick path. And then there's this other path that takes more time.

(5:17 - 5:23)

It's a lot slower. It's more layered. There's a lot of two steps forward, one step back that's involved with it.

(5:24 - 6:55)

And that's because your nervous system actually has to expand in order to hold this new version of you. And you know, if you've listened to this podcast at all, you know that I speak a lot about this, the nervous system and y'all soon, I'm currently interviewing people for the 21 day speaker series that I have coming up and I have some amazing speakers and um, and yeah, and when I'm doing pre-interviews and interviewing them, there's a two or three that I can think of that will really dive more into this polyvagal theory and talk to us more about the nervous system in a digestible way, not in this, what's the nervous system, but like in something that we can really relate to and put into practice. So seriously stay tuned for when that launches and it's going to be absolutely incredible.

I'm so excited. These women are so fantastic. I have women in one man that's going to be coming on anyway, but here is what I want you to really remember today about this, about how sometimes we need to grow into our nervous system is because our brain hates change.

And if you consciously want to feel better, your nervous system is designed to keep you in the familiar because the familiar is super safe for the nervous system. Your nervous system doesn't care about your quality of life. I say this time and time again, it only cares about automation.

(6:55 - 7:17)

It doesn't care if you're loving life. If you're having like, you know, the best relationships, the best sex, the best career, it only cares that you're doing the same thing over and over and over again because that's what keeps you alive. It likes to know that you're going to do the same thing every single day because then it can worry less.

(7:17 - 7:49)

So let's think about those moments where you've made some big changes that are seemingly overnight. Maybe it's you quit drinking. I see this a lot in the women that I work with who just decide I am no longer going to drink and then they just quit and they charge ahead and never drink again.

Or maybe it's when you finally say, I quit my job. You know, you do like a punk rock, no call, no show. I'm just kidding.

(7:49 - 7:57)

That's well, maybe you will, you know, maybe you're just so fed up. You're just like, Oh wait, I'm not coming back. But maybe you're, it's just done.

(7:57 - 8:06)

You're done with your job and you're like, I'm not doing it this morning, this anymore. And you move on. Or maybe you finally say, you know what? I want to be crafty.

(8:06 - 8:35)

And so then you go to the craft store and you buy all the paint brushes and ribbons and glue guns and fancy paper or whatever you do when you're craftsy. And that's it. You have decided from that point on that you're an artist and you're an artist in this way.

And then you set up your space and you are crafting. Those are quantum leaps and they're real and they're powerful and they are completely accessible to you. But not all change happens that way, but that doesn't mean we're not changing.

(8:35 - 9:06)

Sometimes we have to do a little more of inching, like an inchworm our way forward. We have to breathe and reset and test the waters and retreat and try again. And you know, it's like a cycle.

We do this, we take, like I mentioned, like the two steps forward and the one step back kind of thing. And that's exactly how it was for me when I began stepping away from allopathic medicine. For years, being a physician assistant wasn't just my job.

(9:06 - 9:22)

It was my identity. People in healthcare identify as their profession as their job title. I know that's similar in the world of attorneys and I'm sure it's similar in very many other professions, probably a teacher as well.

(9:22 - 9:42)

So it took a long time unraveling that, but I am so glad that I did take the time to unravel it. That I didn't get stuck in the familiar or this automation, this rut of routine. And I allowed myself to grow and be uncomfortable within that expansion.

(9:42 - 10:13)

Because expansion, when you do it in a slow method is oftentimes very painful versus the quantum leap can be like ripping the bandaid off. But this slow shift that I did of transitioning away from the identity of a physician assistant allowed me to open up, allowed me to open up into the new possibilities of healing, really the new science of healing, the new research around healing. And it really allowed me to believe in this thing called quantum leap, to be quite honest.

(10:13 - 10:47)

But if I would have gone the quantum leap path and I would have missed so much of the richness and the learning that I needed to do on the path to where I am right now, because I gained so much knowledge, so much resilience and so much trust in myself by moving slowly. And that might be for you too. You have to let your nervous system catch you or catch up to your desires to, to, to create the capacity to hold these potentially scary shifts and changes and steps forward.

(10:48 - 11:01)

So here's the truth, my love you can choose either one. You can choose to go quick or just go slow. It's not an either or, it's a both and and that's how I live my life.

(11:01 - 11:16)

By the way, everything is a both and nothing isn't either or so sometimes I quantum leap. Other times I take one little tender, gentle step at a time and both are extremely powerful. Both are absolutely sacred to your process.

(11:16 - 11:31)

But what matters most is that you keep moving because what keeps you stuck in that freeze response in the nervous system, which the freeze response is normal. It's not a flaw. It's just your nervous system saying, yo, wait, you're going too fast.

(11:31 - 11:37)

You're doing too much. And the good news is about that. You can learn to move through it.

(11:37 - 11:57)

You can learn to expand your capacity. You can learn to nurture that part of you that feels really nervous when you are doing and trying new things. And of course I'm going to say the best way to expand your capacity is through breath work, but there are many other modalities and I've talked about them.

(11:57 - 12:10)

And other episodes where you can rewire your capacity for change. Our brains love to also expand and rewire itself. It's called neuroplasticity.

(12:11 - 12:38)

It does it in the positive way and it does it in a negative way. So allow your brain, give your brain a chance to, you know, to, to change, to create new wiring. So if you're feeling stuck, if you're feeling like you're stuck in that free cycle of your nervous system, or if you know that you are just ready to quantum leap, or if you don't really know what you need right now, but you just know you need something or someone, then let's talk, babe.

(12:38 - 12:49)

I am so serious about this, this invitation for a free 15 minute connection call with zero pressure. There's no pressure here. I just want to allow you to have the space to exhale.

(12:50 - 13:24)

And I really want this space, this connection call to feel like a little breath of fresh air, this little space where you can have peace of mind and where you can really feel what it's like to have somebody who is nonjudgmental, who is purely there to just listen and learn more about who you are. So a woman named Janine who did a one-on-one call with me, she wrote me and said, I just wanted to say thank you a sincere thank you for the time you gave to speak to me one-on-one. I just found your knowledge and insights and valuable.

(13:24 - 13:50)

I have actively researched and sought out as much information as I possibly could get my hands on to have an intellectual and emotional shift, epiphany and aha moment, your research delivery and your genuine and your generous spirit have shifted something in my core. Your mentor's voice and spirit is something I'd love a daily dose of. So yeah, that's so sweet of her to send me that.

(13:51 - 14:10)

But that's what can happen when we can hold space for one another. And that's what I'd love to do for you. So if this resonates with you, then please just click the link in the show notes to grab a little bit of time before my calendar fills up this month, because like I said, it's about to be summertime and I need nature.

(14:10 - 14:31)

I need to just get out of the house, get out of Austin and get a little bit of nature time. So my loves, whether you want to take this massive leap or into your way forward, I am 100% cheering you on your path is unfolding exactly as it should. I keep telling my husband that we just have to trust the process.

(14:31 - 14:51)

We can have all of these little action items and plan a, B, C and D and these buckets. And then we leave it. Then we stop worrying about it because worrying just takes up all of our energy and we lose our focus from the present current moment, which life is beautiful.

(14:52 - 15:08)

When you can be here right now and you are so much closer to this next version of yourself than you realize. So with big, big love and big possibility, please send this podcast episode to anyone you feel like could use a little bit of inspiration today. See you soon.

(15:10 - 15:25)

The world needs the vibrance and wisdom of a woman's intuition to help heal the world. When we learn to trust ourselves through leaning into and through discomfort, we learn to trust ourselves. And in that space is our power and clarity.