EPI 92 - Why January Doesn’t Need a Reset (and What Your Body Needs Instead)

Hi friend — welcome back to The Habit Within! I’m Camille Kinzler, and today’s episode is a loving invitation to slow way down during a time of year that’s usually loaded with pressure.

You know that strange, in-between space after Christmas and before the New Year? That quiet, blurry, almost suspended moment where time feels weird and expectations feel loud? That’s exactly where this episode was born.

Because I don’t believe January needs a reset.

And I definitely don’t believe you need fixing.

In this episode, I share:

• Why New Year’s resolutions so often fail — and why it has nothing to do with discipline or motivation
• The cultural conditioning that teaches us to wait for “symbolic moments” (Mondays, January 1st, fresh starts) instead of listening to real momentum
• A client story that perfectly illustrates how waiting for the “right time” can actually slow your growth
• Why restriction, force, and rigidity activate stress — especially for women in midlife
• How your nervous system responds to pressure vs. curiosity
• The concept of internal habits — the perceptual lenses we use to see ourselves and the world
• Why no external plan will ever work if the relationship you have with yourself stays the same
• What your body is really asking for right now: safety, regulation, rest, and awareness
• Why January may be calling you not to reinvent yourself — but to return to yourself

This episode is a reminder that you are not starting from zero.

You’re starting from wisdom.

From lived experience.

From a body that has adapted, learned, and carried you through so much already.

And when we honor that, change becomes sustainable — not forced.

Big Takeaways

• January doesn’t require a reset — it requires presence and honesty.
• Your body resists pressure, not growth.
• Awareness creates momentum faster than discipline ever could.
• Internal habits shape external behavior.
• Rest and regulation come before motivation.

I’d love to hear from you

What if, instead of asking “What should I fix?”, you asked

“What feels honest for me right now?”

Send me a message or share this episode with someone who needs permission to soften their start to the year.

If you’re tired of feeling exhausted, irritable, moody, and just not like yourself, schedule a free 30-minute consultation so I can help you feel like YOU again
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Transcript

(0:00 - 0:22)
In today's podcast, we're really looking at why New Year's resolutions aren't the best. Welcome to The Habit Within. This podcast is for high-achieving women, 35 and older, who seem to have it all together, but feel like they're constantly running on fumes, struggling to balance it all, and losing sight of the woman they used to be.

(0:23 - 0:47)
I'm Camille Kinsler, a former physician assistant turned transformational coach, blending science, positive psychology, and a metaphysical approach to habits, health, and vitality. If you've ever asked yourself, why am I so exhausted even after a full night's sleep? Or, I feel like I'm juggling so much, but I'm just barely keeping my head above water. You are in the right place.

(0:47 - 1:06)
Each week, we'll explore the real reasons behind feeling overwhelmed, trapped in the cycle of overworking, and constantly running low on energy, and how to break free from the patterns keeping you stuck in survival mode. It's time to stop living on autopilot, and to start feeling like yourself again. Let's dive in.

(1:06 - 1:30)
Hello. By the time you are listening to this recording, it is going to be in that dead period between right after Christmas and before the New Year's, where it just seems like a black hole, right? Like, what's going on with time? I will be in Pagosa Springs, hanging out with some dear friends, and skiing with my family. And then, yeah.

(1:30 - 1:44)
And then it was going to be the New Year. And we will see what the New Year brings once it comes. I really like to unravel the end of one year, and the beginning of the next year, really slowly and with ease.

(1:45 - 2:09)
Once I had children, and I recognized that this is a very busy time of year, I always felt so anxious about reflecting on the past year, and the intentions I was setting for the New Year, or whatever my New Year's resolutions are going to be. And then I decided to just throw all that to the side. And then really that second week of January is where I typically make space to focus on those things.

(2:10 - 2:24)
And I think this is a perfect segue into what we're going to be talking about in today's podcast. We're really looking at why New Year's resolutions aren't the best. And I'll give you an alternative in next week's podcast.

(2:24 - 2:48)
So we'll just go ahead and jump right in. I'm Camille Kinzler, I'm your host, and this is The Habit With N. And yeah, today, the reason why I came up with this podcast topic theme is during a consultation, an appointment I had, a session I had with a client this morning. And it just wraps up perfectly what I think so many of us are navigating right now.

(2:48 - 3:20)
And so as we were wrapping up our session, I always like to walk through the next three action steps, the next three things that a client is going to do in order to get to the results that they want. So these are really small action items that are very supportive in getting them the momentum that they need to fulfill whatever dream that they are looking for within their vitality and within their health within a two-week period. And she was so excited.

(3:20 - 3:39)
She knew exactly what she wanted to focus on and you could just feel the momentum being like building in her body. And she was really looking forward to starting this coming Monday during that dead zone, right, that I was talking about earlier. And then she was like, oh, wait, maybe I won't start this Monday because that's right before New Year's.

(3:39 - 3:55)
And maybe I'll just wait to start in the new year. And this is so important, y'all, because maybe you are in that same boat. And when I heard that, I heard first off, it's like, no, when you have the momentum, when you have that action and that desire just pulling you forward, you have to move on it.

(3:56 - 4:07)
You have to take action now. But she was really working on conditioning, right? What we're conditioned to do is wait until it's a Monday. Wait until it's a new year.

(4:08 - 4:27)
Wait until there is this, you know, symbolic moment, right? I actually did this TikTok post way, way back when. And it said something like, you know, hey, you want to start Monday before you, you know, quit drinking. I think it was around drinking at the time.

(4:28 - 4:45)
And then I, you know, leaned into the camera and said, hey, it's Monday. And it actually got a lot of views because it's so real, right? That's what we do. We try to wait for like this perfectly round number or starting point to start the things that we know we want to do now.

(4:45 - 5:08)
But it really slows us down when we do that. And I also really needed to remind her, and this is what I want to encourage you guys to do when you're looking at your new year goals or resolutions or intentions or whatever it might be for you, is that, you know, it's not about a cleanse, right? It's not about a diet. It's not about do this for 100 days or don't do that for 100 days.

(5:09 - 5:30)
It's not about like controlling every aspect of your new goal, right? It's really more about awareness. It's opening yourself up to noticing what feels supportive and what doesn't, what gives you energy and what drains your energy. And really waiting for the right time to begin to listen to ourselves.

(5:30 - 5:42)
We're just missing, we're missing the point. We're missing the mark. It's really about using this as an opportunity to listen to what our body needs right now and the power that it holds right now.

(5:43 - 5:59)
And, you know, it shouldn't be around this idea of luck or restraining. It really is about these little subtle moves and action items that we put in our lives day in and day out. Excuse me.

(5:59 - 6:10)
I'm healing from a little cold right now. So pardon my sexy raspy voice. Maybe you don't think it's sexy, but whatever.

(6:11 - 6:35)
Anyway, so back to like why I don't believe resolutions last. And it's mainly because, well, first off, the studies show that most people abandon their resolutions by day 15 and then the majority of people by day 30, which is crazy, y'all. I mean, that means right there that we're not doing it right.

(6:35 - 6:43)
We're not doing this resolution thing right. If the majority of us can't even make it to 30 days. But I don't think it has anything really to do with discipline.

(6:43 - 7:10)
And I don't think it has to do with laziness. But I do think it often has to do a lot with all of the restriction and the force that we put on these New Year's resolutions and not the relationship that we're trying to gain with whatever that resolution is, right, with whatever that changes, whatever that relationship that we're trying to create within ourselves or within others. And oftentimes this sounds like I'll be good starting January 1st.

(7:10 - 7:19)
So maybe I wasn't good all year round. And maybe actually I only made it 15 days last January. But this January is going to be different because I'm going to work harder.

(7:19 - 7:24)
I'm going to push harder. I'm going to have my habit tracker all ready for me. I'm going to have it on my phone.

(7:24 - 7:32)
I'm going to have a paper one. I am going to get an accountability partner. I'm just going to push, work, and restrict more so I can actually achieve that goal.

(7:33 - 8:02)
But your nervous system actually hates that. Your nervous system, and depending really on your genes and how you deal with cortisol, but also based on your history, your life history, your, you know, big T, small T trauma history, how you have, what kind of relationship you have with your nervous system currently. It might really, really react poorly to this and become very, like respond poorly to that rigidity.

(8:02 - 8:09)
And yeah, our bodies, you'll notice it because you'll get exhausted. You'll get worn out. You'll get burnt out.

(8:09 - 8:15)
And it won't feel like joy. It will feel like work. And that's what January feels like.

(8:15 - 8:28)
It carries so much expectation that we have to fix all of our habits and we have to upgrade our body. You know, the new year, new you type of thing. You have to get more disciplined, become better and faster and more optimized.

(8:28 - 8:44)
And y'all, I use the word optimized. So I get that some of the language that I use in my marketing can often feel this way or that has a tendency to feel this way, but it's never my intention. And growth isn't this problem.

(8:45 - 9:02)
It's actually beautiful to want to grow and to change and to develop and to evolve. But it really is that energy that's behind it that often misses the mark. And so, so many of these new year's resolutions and messages have this unspoken belief.

(9:02 - 9:12)
And that belief is what? That belief is that who you are right now isn't enough. That you're not good enough right now. And your body hears that.

(9:12 - 9:20)
Your nervous system hears that. And this is especially for women in midlife. This kind of pressure just does not motivate us.

(9:20 - 9:29)
That's old school. It just constricts us. And women really in midlife are in this blooming stage.

(9:29 - 9:43)
We're in like this beautiful changing point where we're blossoming. And when something like feels rigid, it really constricts us. And it blurs our clarity.

(9:43 - 9:56)
This urgency makes everything less clear. And this resistance interferes with the momentum that we can actually have. And that self-criticism isn't self-trust.

(9:56 - 10:10)
And we, especially in midlife, are really creating these moments of building more self-trust. And we have more confidence. And we know the steps that we need to take and make in order to fully be and live into ourselves.

(10:11 - 10:25)
And so we can start, you know, kind of just shoving off. You know, sloughing off or ignoring all of these old school expectations of what January should bring. Because here's the truth.

(10:26 - 10:36)
Here is the truth. You're not starting from ground zero. You're not starting from, you know, a fresh start on January 1st.

(10:36 - 10:47)
You're starting from so much experience. And you have so much wisdom. And your body has lived and adapted and learned so much throughout the years.

(10:47 - 11:11)
So when we treat January like this big red reset button, we accidentally are just dismissing everything that we have been trying to integrate up until now. And again, the body does not respond well to that. So, you know, it's like, let's not pretend like none of this has happened up until today.

(11:11 - 11:38)
Let's really start and change from this place of pulling in everything that we have learned and all of our lived experiences and what we've adapted in our life thus far. And that really, really comes down to listening to yourself. And a few episodes ago, I mentioned the importance of really carving out some time in January that's just for you.

(11:38 - 12:03)
Maybe it's a few hours or a day or a weekend where you're spending really reflecting on the last year and really pulling all of that knowledge into your body and creating what is true for you for this coming year. The other thing is like the name of this podcast is called The Habit Within and maybe a lot of people don't know what that means. But for me, it's that change really occurs from the inside out.

(12:03 - 12:24)
Because before we change what we do, we have to change how we see the world, how we interpret a moment, how we tell a story, how we relate to discomfort, to desire, to uncertainty. Most habits aren't the behavioral ones at the core. And I want you to really think about that.

(12:25 - 14:10)
There are these perceptual habits. They're the lens that we use to view the world. And that lens can be something like we view the world as being behind, that we shouldn't, that the world shouldn't feel this hard, that relationships shouldn't feel this hard, that you should be further along than you are, that you should be doing more, that something is wrong with you. 

And when those internal habits really go in question, no external change will ever feel like enough. I'm going to say that again. When your internal habits of your thoughts and the way that you perceive and view the world are unchanged, then nothing that you do externally will affect that. 

This is why someone can follow a plan absolutely perfectly and still feel disconnected or stop doing it 15 days later or 30 days later. Because the relationship that they have with themselves, their self-worth, their ability to rest, their ability to make things more effortlessly hasn't shifted. And what they're, you know, and so what happens is that we think that with more discipline, then things will change when it really is about awareness. 

So notice when you're moving from fear or moving into fear instead of staying in curiosity. Notice when you are forcing something instead of allowing yourself the moments to listen. Notice when you're trying to chase this outcome instead of really honoring the process.

(14:10 - 15:01)
And that's what I was really speaking with my client about this morning is that it's not about the outcome. It is about the process and how you feel while you're doing it. Because the outcome, it could take years to really get there. 

And woman, it has taken years to get where you are right now. And so just think, it also will take years to get the outcome that you're desiring. And so you have to honor the process. 

You have to start enjoying the process. You have to feel better within the process. And so when those internal habits shift, then our behavior will naturally follow. 

And not because we are making ourselves change, but because change is finally what we feel in our body. We've embodied that change. And that's what your nervous system wants and wants to feel safe.

(15:01 - 15:42)
And once all those internal habits begin to really soften and something important happens, that is when that nervous system feels safe. So if your body feels tired and foggy brained and unmotivated and all this resistance, that's information for you. Because that is your body telling you that you need a little bit more of your nervous system cared for. 

You need to be living a little bit more of a calmer internal state. Create that habit within you that creates that stability and that safety. Because growth comes from that regulation.

(15:42 - 16:57)
Weight loss comes from that regulation. People don't recognize how much we hold on to, how much stress, how much adipose tissue we hold, and inflammation we hold on to our bodies when we're in a stressed state. So before motivation comes the permission that we give ourselves to rest and clarity also comes with rest. 

So sometimes the most supportive thing you can do to start off this new year is pause. That's why I say carve out some time for you. Instead of plan, see what comes through. 

What if the reason goal setting hasn't worked in the past isn't because of some failed approach, but because the approach didn't honor your biology and the season of life that you're in or your lived reality? What if your body isn't resisting change? It's resisting the pressure that we're putting on it. Yeah? What if January isn't asking you to reinvent yourself? What if it's asking you to return to yourself? And that can look different in different seasons. And oftentimes we return to ourselves time and time again.

(16:58 - 17:04)
Multiple times. It's not a one and done thing. So this is what I invite you to do.

(17:04 - 17:38)
Instead of asking, what should I fix? Maybe ask what feels honest to me right now. Instead of who do I want to become? Maybe try, how do I want to relate to myself this year? Be kinder, more of a slower entry, and I know this can feel very, very hard for a lot of us who want to get our little habit tracker out and hit the ground running, but I tell you this is exactly what you are needing. It's not to try harder, it's to try different.

(17:39 - 18:00)
And so if you would like a little bit support, this is how I help work with women. If you feel like you're doing all of the right things but your body isn't responding to the way, or isn't responding the way that you expect, it is not about trying harder. It's about understanding how your body is wired.

(18:01 - 18:23)
And inside the genetic vitality experience, that is what we look at. We look at your unique blueprint. Not to label you, I hate labeling, but to help you really understand how your body handles stress, how you process hormones and detoxify molds and metals and all of the other things.

(18:23 - 18:47)
And how you are designed to create energy and resilience. So instead of forcing yourself into somebody else's plan because you're going to have so many options on Instagram, but you really learn how to work with your own biology and not against it. So if this is sparking some curiosity, you're welcome to learn more by going into the show notes.

(18:48 - 19:03)
And if it's not the right time, that is okay too, because awareness is always first and I will always honor that. And so if you're listening to this and thinking, I don't really feel ready to set my goals again this year, then I applaud you, my love. That is wise.

(19:04 - 19:24)
And in the next episode I will share what I choose to do instead of making goals. It's just a word, one single word, and I'll share that word with you next week. And I'll share how that's quietly going to shape all these other areas of my life within my relationships and my work and my voice and my inner life and all the things.

(19:25 - 19:36)
So stay tuned for next week while I dive into that. And I hope that you enjoyed this episode as much as I enjoyed making it for you. Until next time.

(19:39 - 19:53)
The world needs the vibrance and wisdom of a woman's intuition to help heal the world. When we learn to trust ourselves through leaning into and through discomfort, we learn to trust ourselves if in that space is our power and clarity.