Top 10 Inspirational Moments on Penny For Your Thoughts Podcast | Best of 2024

What an incredible year it’s been! In this special episode of Penny for Your Shots, we’re looking back at the top 10 most inspiring, fun, and impactful moments from 2024. From Shirah Benarde’s Shark Tank success story to Joanna Giangardella’s powerful journey of beating stage 4 cancer, these moments showcase the resilience, creativity, and brilliance of our guests.

We’ll also revisit some unforgettable highlights, like Lydia Martin’s mantra of “massive imperfect action,” Niamh McAnally’s philosophy of saying “yes,” and a sneak peek into the groovy plans for Wine Camp 2025.

Join me as we celebrate a year of connection, growth, and storytelling. Whether you’re new to the podcast or a longtime listener, this episode is a perfect reminder of the power of sharing our journeys.

Tune in, and let’s toast to another amazing year ahead!

Perfect for: Entrepreneurs, dreamers, and anyone seeking inspiration and joy.

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Transcript

[00:00:00] Penny Fitzgerald: 2024 was my first full year of podcasting and I took a look back at the most shared and inspirational moments and compiled these top 10 moments into a best of episode. What do you think? Are these your top 10? What was your favorite moment or guest? Was there another that stuck out?

[00:00:56] Let me know. I'd love to know your thoughts. Thank you so much for listening. It would help tremendously if you would follow and share my podcast with your friends. I so appreciate your support and your help in getting the word out. Cheers to you and cheers to more growth and success in the new year. 

[00:01:14] Shirah Benarde: when I was in high school, I had a college friend that was roofied at the bar. And, um, a few weeks later, I, um, Went to bed one night and I thought of an idea in my sleep. Um, the next morning I woke up and I sat down with my dad to create the 1st prototype out of my mom's pantyhose or stockings and especially for my room.

[00:01:41] I didn't really. Know how to vocalize what I was thinking. So I made it visual with, you know, her old stockings and, um, I taped them together and created a little prototype and that's kind of when nightcap was born. 

[00:01:55] Penny Fitzgerald: That's so cool. So back up a second, you, you had a friend who actually was roofied in high school or call wishing college.

[00:02:04] Shirah Benarde: Yeah, she was an older college friend, but, um, ever since starting the company, I mean, there's so many people that have this experience and 

[00:02:13] Um, but now, you know, our products give them peace of mind. And I know I didn't really explain what it is, but, um, the scrunchie that doubles as a drink cover and you can wear it on your wrist or in your hair. And then when you go out. Um, you, um, can put it over your drink to protect yourself.

[00:02:30] It's washable reusable. And now we have like a whole product line, uh, for unisex options and disposable options, uh, to just basically ensure that anyone can be safe no matter who they are, what they're drinking. So that is our goal. We're just trying to protect people one nightcap at a time. 

[00:02:50] we went on Shark Tank in, uh, 2021. Uh, we filmed a year or six months prior, so 2020, and we had to quarantine in a hotel room for 10 days. Oh, 

[00:03:01] Audio Only - All Participants: wow. 

[00:03:02] Shirah Benarde: Yeah, it was fun. We printed out a bunch of pictures of the sharks and put them on the couch and just like pitched all day every day and wow, 

[00:03:16] Penny Fitzgerald: practice.

[00:03:17] Shirah Benarde: Yeah, it was a lot of, a lot of pitching. And then, um, eventually on the 10th day we went out and, um, Pitched our product and then yeah, Lori jumped on it super quickly. She asked for, we, we asked for 20 percent of the business for 25 or no, for 60, 000. And then she, uh, came in for 25 percent at 60, 000. So she does still work with us yet.

[00:03:44] Penny Fitzgerald: That's neat. Do you get to work with her personally? 

[00:03:47] Shirah Benarde: Yeah. Yeah. 

[00:03:50] Penny Fitzgerald: Wonderful. What, so what, um, what has shifted since you started? Like what, what did she bring and what did you, um, find that changed in the way that you were doing business? 

[00:04:03] Shirah Benarde: Yeah, I would say, um, she, Well, we went on sharp tank very early on in the company.

[00:04:10] So her expertise was needed at the time. Like, I remember, um, right after the show, she was like, you guys, She's teaching us about branding and she was like telling us how like in the first Few seconds of somebody looking at your product. They need to know what it is So I think that's when we added like we changed the colors we added like a phrase on top that's gonna tell you exactly what it is you made it pop more and It was pretty eye opening to know like, okay, this is This is, you know, you need to catch people's attention within like two seconds.

[00:04:50] Penny Fitzgerald: Yeah. 

[00:04:51] Shirah Benarde: You don't have a lot of attention, so you need to capture it. And, you know, if you're sitting on a store shelf like that, it was the same for the same. Um, people want to know exactly what it is. And if they don't, they keep walking. 

[00:05:03] Penny Fitzgerald: Mm hmm. 

[00:05:04] Shirah Benarde: Yeah. 

[00:05:05] Penny Fitzgerald: Yeah. So how did you come up with the name? Because it's brilliant.

[00:05:08] It's 

[00:05:09] Shirah Benarde: brilliant. So right when I, right when I sat down with my dad and created the prototype, he immediately said, it's either a nightcap or top hat. I was like, well, there's a clear winner. We're not doing top hat, but I really love the name nightcap too. Um, and you know, right, right. And then there, we like found a graphic designer to create some logos and, um, just like.

[00:05:41] Really jumped into it at 1st. I feel like a lot of people get wrapped up and needs to be perfect and it needs to look a certain way. And like, everything that we create in the beginning is honestly just different. Now we've changed the logo. We've changed our website and design and like. We've, we're just completely different people than we were five years ago.

[00:06:02] So I think everything has changed in that way. And I, I feel like, um, yeah, like it was, it was more so like, what are, what problem are we solving? And like, we need to solve this fast instead of like, let's get this branding and all this stuff to be perfect. It was probably about that. So we took the steps that we needed to, um, we were really focused on.

[00:06:27] our mission rather than perfection. 

[00:06:30] Penny Fitzgerald: That's great. That was what I was going to ask you next is, is how did you, like, when you got started, I see so many entrepreneurs, they get stuck in that. They get stuck in, you know, I've got to make it perfect or I'm who am I to be doing this? And I was wondering if you encountered any of that in your own journey, did you feel like, Oh my gosh, this is a great idea, but I'm not ready.

[00:06:53] Or did you, did you encounter any of those kinds of blocks? 

[00:06:57] Shirah Benarde: Yeah, like, of course, because we were so young, especially me, I was only 16. So, um, I think when I, when I thought of the idea, I didn't let that get to me. And I was more so, um, excited about the problem we were solving instead of, Getting too wrapped up in my own head because I, I usually talk about this because at 16, I was like, very, I'd say insecure about, like, what I knew and what I didn't know, which was a lot.

[00:07:28] Um, and I think, like, um, I felt like I had to know more and I wasn't ready to. Be like the CEO and like, have this title because I was so young, uh, which makes sense. But, um, I think that the journey of learning is so much more important than like, thinking you need to know it all in the beginning because you don't like you I've met so many like females or entrepreneurs in general that.

[00:07:59] Um, they say like your advantage sometimes it's like having no resources, having no money and knowing nothing in the beginning, because that's kind of what helps you learn and discover trial and error, um, just like pivoting. Um, so, yeah, definitely, like, I got in the way of myself. I would self sabotage in my own head, but, um, you know, we were solving something bigger than us.

[00:08:26] So you just kind of figure it out, literally. 

[00:08:31] Penny Fitzgerald: That's so exciting. And I'm so proud of you for doing that. Cause yeah, it's very common to just kind of let yourself get stuck and feel like, well, I don't know enough yet, or I don't know what I'm doing or who am I to do this and keeping your, who you were serving in mind and working for them, you know, for a solution to a problem.

[00:08:50] That's so amazing. Congratulations. 

[00:08:54] Shirah Benarde: Thank you. Thank you. Yeah, I think, um, no, I mean, everything in entrepreneurship, it's like something comes your way. You figure it out. You can exit every single thing. It's like, we're not, we're not given like a big brochure. It's like this. Yeah. And 

[00:09:12] Penny Fitzgerald: exactly. 

[00:09:13] Shirah Benarde: Yeah, I think a lot of people get.

[00:09:15] Uh, stuck with that because they spend money and go to college and then they get out of college and they are confused why they don't know how to start a business. And it's not that college invalidates that. It's that like, it's all experience that you have to jump into it and learn. How to start a business.

[00:09:34] Penny Fitzgerald: Yeah. You have to 

[00:09:35] Shirah Benarde: start. Yeah. 

[00:09:38] Penny Fitzgerald: I think that's very true. Like when you start, it kind of brings clarity to what's next, you know, and of course you're going to change. And like you said, your logo, your marketing, a lot of it changed, but that's part of it in any business. 

[00:09:53] Shirah Benarde: Yeah, exactly. And I, yeah, I hope that like more people start to like, understand that and realize that because it's so important.

[00:10:03] Like, whatever you're trying to solve someone's someone out there has that problem. And like, they're not looking at. Your logo or your name, they, they need the outcome. 

[00:10:15] Penny Fitzgerald: Yeah, exactly. The transformation or the, the safety in your case. So tell us about your other book.

[00:10:24] Are you, can you tell us a little bit about that journey? 

[00:10:29] Joanna Giangardella: Yes. Uh, it would have been 18 years ago now. I was diagnosed with stage four cancer. It was a very aggressive form of cancer. It was within four weeks. You see me like you see me now. And in four weeks I was on fentanyl and in a wheelchair. It was very, very aggressive.

[00:10:50] So they treated me very aggressively, but I recovered very quickly. And I recovered because I have the will, obviously, and the strength behind me, but I wanted to, I looked at every possible thing that I could do for myself to recover or help in the recovery process. And I started juicing and I started taking these supplements, these food supplements that were recommended to me by my oncologist, and, she said 80 percent of our patients are on it.

[00:11:32] So I went full board with it. And I went in, they set me up for 12 chemotherapy treatments, but I went into remission after only three. So, you know, along the way, I wanted to write the book because I wanted to give people hope. Because you have stage four cancer doesn't mean it's a death sentence. And a lot of times people think that they are.

[00:11:58] at their, their end. It's, you know, what their mind thinks the body will follow, correct? 

[00:12:04] Penny Fitzgerald: It's what you've heard and what you believe and, yeah, it's scary. Yeah. 

[00:12:08] Joanna Giangardella: You can make things happen. And I wanted to give people hope is why I wanted to write the book. So I wrote my whole journey from front to back. And there was some hiccups along the way because they wanted me to have stem cell transplant using my own stem cells, which is autologous.

[00:12:30] stem cell program because if it comes back the first year, they say we'll come back the first year and then it's going to be very hard for us to treat you. And of course, you know, you're scared into it here. You're feeling good. You're recovering and so forth. And, uh, you feel really good about your program and the direction you're going, and then you say, yes, okay, I will do that.

[00:12:53] And that is a really, people don't understand, that is a very hard and rigorous program. With all the medication that they give you to prepare you for this, and they, they extract, uh, stem cells from you and they bank it. and then they put you in the hospital and give you a lot of drugs to, um, promote more white blood cells in your body.

[00:13:21] And they give you anti seizure medication. It is a whole program. And then they give you five days of chemotherapy, which they bring you to the brink of death with five days straight of chemotherapy. And then they put the stem cells back in, your stem cells back into your body to help you recover. Wow. No, I did.

[00:13:44] They didn't do a bone marrow transplant. This is using your own stem cells. Looking back, I think, why would they want to use my own stem cells? Thinking that I might still have some cancer cell activity in my body. Some marker 

[00:14:01] in there. 

[00:14:02] But that said, while I was in the hospital, and they check your blood every day, they check and see where you're at.

[00:14:12] They found that myself and about, I don't know, it was three other people on the floor were infected with hepatitis B. 

[00:14:21] Penny Fitzgerald: Oh no. 

[00:14:22] Joanna Giangardella: So my, my liver enzymes shot up to the highest number they've ever seen, which normally can be anywhere between 35 to 45 on a healthy person. Mine shot up to 2, 500. So my, my liver was getting ready to shut down.

[00:14:44] So they took me off the program and, and I started on a medication. I was the first one to get on this medication. And of course I just wanted to go home and get back on my program, my juicing, my, my protein shakes, my supplements, my food and my meditation and everything that, you know, my whole program.

[00:15:07] And I did, I went back home and I completely recovered from that. And that was 

[00:15:15] 16 years ago. 

[00:15:18] Penny Fitzgerald: So probably a two year process from your diagnosis to going through all of that for two years. 

[00:15:26] Joanna Giangardella: Yes. Wow. Just the whole process. that was involved the first year and so on and so forth. So, yes, you know, I, I had my, what they call a cancerversary, uh, memorial this last May as 18 years.

[00:15:42] So I'm figuring, you know, about 16 and a half years ago, I was there in that time. Yeah,

[00:15:50] Penny Fitzgerald: in the thick of it. 

[00:15:52] Joanna Giangardella: In the thick of it. And after that, I decided that I'm going to continue my journey as I feel necessary for me, for my body and my experience. And, um, my mother, I did have a relapse. My mother was killed in an automobile accident here in Greece.

[00:16:20] So I flew, I heard about it on Friday. I flew Saturday morning. I was here Sunday morning and it was a pretty traumatic experience 

[00:16:35] to go through 

[00:16:36] and a few months after that, I'd say about four or five months after that, my regular checkup with a seat, a PET scan, they found that there's, there was cancer cell activity in several lymph nodes around my heart.

[00:16:55] So, um, they took some of the lymph nodes out and, and gave me, uh, another series of just four chemotherapy treatments. And since then I've been cancer free. So keeping your stress level down, of course, for people is very important. And in the last, I'd say five years after I came out with my book, Dancing Skeleton, A Journey Through Stage 4 Cancer.

[00:17:25] I, people would reach out to me, people were reaching out to me for help, and, um, I started mentoring different people and helping them, holding their hands and so forth, giving them support. And I worked for a couple of wellness, uh, centers, wellness, health and wellness centers as their cancer support coach. And then I became certified. I wanted to become certified as a cancer coach. a cancer health coach through the American Cancer Education Institute. And uh, this is pretty much where I am now. Helping people in their diet, their nutrition, their supplements. I give, there's resources for meditation, visualization workshops, anything that they need. 

[00:18:19] Penny Fitzgerald: the thing that really strikes me is that those who have looked for opportunities and said yes to them throughout the years are most happy, or they are finding a lot of joy in what, in saying yes to things and living with no regrets. And in your book, I find that, um, thread throughout all the stories.

[00:18:43] I just hear you saying yes to a lot of times. 

[00:18:47] Niamh McAnally: Yeah. And I think it's important to remain open. Uh, for me there, I grew up with a freelance mentality because both my parents were actors and so variety was kind of normal for us in our house. And, you know, they would get cast in a show for three or four weeks at a time and they wouldn't necessarily know when the next job was coming, um, or if it was coming.

[00:19:08] And so they kind of managed to walk a tightrope financially, but yet they still were able to put a roof over our heads and feed us. And, and towards the end of my dad's life, he was suddenly getting major roles in movies and stuff like that. So like the big money was right around the corner before he passed away.

[00:19:27] But as a result of that growing up, it meant that I was kind of given this permission to look for opportunities, um, to be open and be aware and know that change happens and we have to be ready to adapt and be flexible. And. if you, if you kind of go down a straight and narrow path and you're not open to other possibilities, you don't know what you're going to miss out on, you know?

[00:19:55] so no matter what befalls me now, I kind of have to stop and go ask a better question. You know, it's not like, why is this happening to me as opposed to why is this happening for me? 

[00:20:06] Right. Right. Wow. Or what can it bring me? What can I, what new opportunity might be around the corner because of that?

[00:20:16] Exactly. 

[00:20:17] Exactly. And you know, they say, uh, that expression, you know, when one door closes, another one opens. Sometimes you actually 

[00:20:25] Penny Fitzgerald: have to close the door yourself. Right. And get over your fear in doing that. That's that. I think that's the, for me, that's the hard part is like just taking that step one step in front of the other and have some courage and just.

[00:20:39] Yeah. 

[00:20:43] Niamh McAnally: And every step you take, I mean, if you have this ultimate goal, um, desire, dream, whatever that might be, and it seems overwhelming, you take it in those tiny baby steps, you know, what can I do today? That's going to move me towards that. Yeah. 

[00:21:00] Penny Fitzgerald: And take that step that makes you, you know, with one little success, then you start getting more, more faith and more courage.

[00:21:06] Wow. I'm okay. I'm safe. And then take that next step. Exactly. 

[00:21:11] Niamh McAnally: There's, um, I don't know if you remember Eckhart Tolle's book, um, which was, oh, I had the now in the word. What was it? Uh, it'll come back to me in a second. Um, but I remember specifically chapter three about living in the now, and I've taken that very much on board.

[00:21:27] And one, one time I was going for a skydive in, uh, Texas, believe it or not. Um, and it was, I had skydived, I had, parachuted as, as a younger person in Ireland where, you know, a static line you had, you know, you were tied to the plane and you jumped out of the plane. And then after three seconds, the, the canopy opened for you and, you know, you 

[00:21:45] came 

[00:21:46] down, excuse me.

[00:21:48] Um, but this time it was skydiving tandem. So it was going to be like a 40 second free fall, et cetera. And I'd never done that before. And I thought I'm going to test this theory out and see about living in the now. Can you really. truly live in the moment and not get fearful about that moment who you're standing, you know, in the doorway of a plane.

[00:22:07] So I started the process when we went into the hangar and they told us to put on the jumpsuit. And this is like moments before we're going in the plane, before the jump. And I'm thinking, Okay. If I'm living in the moment right now, I am putting on a jumpsuit. I've put on clothes before. There's nothing scary about putting on clothes, right?

[00:22:27] That's fine. 

[00:22:29] Well, yes, okay. Unless like they really A, don't fit or B, they're super ugly or something. But you know what I mean? So I'm putting on the jumpsuit and then we start walking this. Okay guys, it's time. And we started walking out, um, towards the plane. And then. which would normally where you would be thinking you're going to get super anxious, right?

[00:22:46] And then I went, I am walking towards a plane. I have done that on countless times. I've flown all over the world. That is not an issue. And now I'm walking up the steps of the plane. Yes, I've done that. Sometimes at this jet bridge, sometimes you're walking across the tarmac and you're going up the plane.

[00:22:59] Now I'm in a plane and the plane is taking off. Now, granted there isn't a door on the plane, so that is slightly different. Or if it is, it's open, right. And, um, and then, uh, and then that moment where it's like, okay, the end, they, they put the engine to a stall and then you're in the door gateway or the doorway of the plane, I think, well, I got somebody tight on my back who knows what he's doing.

[00:23:20] So that's pretty cool. Right. And then, and then the jump and, and that 40 seconds of free fall, um, In that, in those 40 second moments, which was a long time, by the way, um, you're still in the, now you haven't bumped into anything. You're in the air, you know, nothing is hurting you. And really the only moment of any concern per se.

[00:23:44] is, although I'm sure there's skydivers out there at the time, you know, there's lots of other moments, but the real moment is that impact with the earth. Like, you know, are you going to land correctly? Right. And then we landed correctly. Thank you very much. And walked away. And it was that, that, um, process of staying in the actual moment, second by second by second.

[00:24:04] And it worked. So I didn't get fearful. 

[00:24:06] Penny Fitzgerald: Okay. Wow. That's really, that's a great tip to, well, to apply to anything, but holy cow, feeling that, you know, what you did, the jump itself. 

[00:24:20] Niamh McAnally: Right. And I think part of, where our anxieties and our fears come from is we project our, our emotions into the future. 

[00:24:29] And 

[00:24:29] we try and we start thinking about, Oh, what if this happens?

[00:24:33] What if that happens? What if I fail? What if I succeed? Sometimes that's a big thing for people to succeed. Um, so, so. We can definitely take everything from the past because it's the combination of who we are and our experiences makes up who we are today. But at the same time, um, we only are who we are today and who, what happens in the future is totally in the unknown and we can replace fear with excitement.

[00:25:00] And I think that's a big difference. 

[00:25:02] Lydia Martin: I didn't want to let anything out into the world unless I knew it was going to be successful, unless I knew it was going to be perfect, and that everyone would just think it's all wonderful, right? And I was like, I can't have that mantra. An entrepreneur builds a train while it goes down the track, right?

[00:25:20] Like, yeah, you just stay in the station and make it pretty. You are missing out on so much. And so I had heard a trainer say, take massive and perfect action. And love it. That was what I adopted. I was like, I'm going to say that to myself every day. Massive imperfect action because nothing moves forward until you take action.

[00:25:43] That's right. It brings clarity. That's why it's funny you say that because so many people think I have to get clarity and I have to get confidence before I do something. Nope. Clarity and confidence comes by doing. Exactly. Exactly. 

[00:25:57] Penny Fitzgerald: slowing down, I feel like in business too, don't you, do you agree that you have to slow down to speed up? You 

[00:26:06] Judy Hahn: have to, yeah, here's what happens in a little of the functional wellness, if you'll bear with me, just because I don't practice doesn't mean I don't preach.

[00:26:17] That's right. I don't know that the, like most people. Are willing to acknowledge the amount of stress that they have in their life. You know, I've been at meetings where I hear somebody go, oh, I had to take my mom here and I had to take my dad there and the kids and schlep them here and. They had gymnastics and then I had to go here and there and I did the carpool and, and the next one sitting at the table goes, Oh, you think your life is bad.

[00:26:54] Let me tell you what I'm doing. You don't win for being the busiest. I was just going to say it's not a badge of honor guys. No, right? As a matter of fact, That's what really, really made me aware of, cause I asked afterwards, so, so do you think you have a high stress level? Oh, no. And I'm like, you know what happens?

[00:27:20] You have stress. And then you get used to it, right? It becomes your norm and then you have all these other things that are like the kids and your parents and because we are, we're sandwich generation, right? Taking care of our parents, taking care of our kids and everybody else's and, and then, so then you have the doctor tells you some bad news about some tests you had or whatever it is, your stress level goes up.

[00:27:49] But you, not you, but the you, the you says, Oh, that's just normal. And so you accept that stress level is your new norm and people, you want to know what creates the majority of inflammation in the body, which is what creates chronic degenerative disease. It's stress. 

[00:28:15] Penny Fitzgerald: Mm hmm. 

[00:28:16] Judy Hahn: It's stress, right? High cortisol levels, burning up a little bit of those adrenals.

[00:28:22] And what's happening at nighttime? People don't know how to eat properly. And I'm not just talking about the crap that we eat when we get upset. There really is something called eating hygiene. It has to do with the fact that our bodies start digestion before we ever even put food in our mouth. and people don't know that.

[00:28:45] And then things like sleep, there's sleep hygiene. Go to bed at a specific hour, get up at a specific hour, the room needs to be dark, it should be quite cool, um, you know, your phone shouldn't be there, you shouldn't be looking at it before you go to bed. All of those things, all of it adds up and then people wonder, yeah, but how did, and I, What's like?

[00:29:14] I have something wrong with me. They go to the doctor. The doctor says, oh, you have a thyroid problem, which is the biggest thing doctors tell people. And then Western medicine has. Interesting ways of dealing with things, because Western Medicine is all about what's wrong with you and what medication can I give you?

[00:29:36] Instead of staying well. Staying well, or as a functional wellness coach or a functional medicine doctor will do, it's about what do you have? Why do you have it? Let's figure out the root cause and get rid of it. That would be great. Yeah. And I was at the, um, I had to have an endoscopy in the anesthesiologist walked in the room.

[00:30:06] She said, Oh, you're 72. I was like, this is not news to me, honey. And then she says, Oh, and you don't take any medications. I was like, right. Like it was a miracle. You're 72 and you don't take any medications because I listen to all these people and they're taking blood pressure medication and Diabetes medication And the PPI is which you really shouldn't PPI is to lower your stomach acid a doctor I'll tell you she told me you have too much stomach acid and I said, excuse me This was the doctor after the endoscopy.

[00:30:51] I said, really? Too much stomach acid? There is no such thing, really. It's stomach acid in the wrong place. Yeah. Going up, you were, you know, getting reflux or whatever it was. She was like, Oh, stomach acid in the wrong place. I was like, bingo. 

[00:31:10] Penny Fitzgerald: She's not used to talking to someone who knows what the difference is.

[00:31:14] Judy Hahn: Well, and I think it's important. And I think that the other thing is, and this is a whole nother conversation, but I think people don't ask questions. They believe that the doctor is the the authority. All knowing, right? So yes, back to self care and slowing down in your business, it's huge. The, you cannot take care of others if your cup is empty.

[00:31:41] Victoria Chai: I've worked with many people who are uncomfortable at parties, and I think parties, networking events, parties, cocktail hour, things like that. Not that you have to drink at them, because I don't usually drink if I go to a networking event.

[00:31:58] I drink an iced tea. I don't drink a cocktail. I drink a mocktail or I drink something like that. That's my personal choice. However, to learn how to navigate that particular kind of social thing is daunting to many people because you're walking to a room of people you mostly don't know. Right. And so how can we make it easier?

[00:32:18] easier and comfortable for ourselves. So I have a several step process that I'll go through very quickly if you're okay with that. Sure. So the first time I started to do this, I was with my husband who's in the corporate world, works for a big bank, JPMorgan Chase, and I would go to these networking events where there were hundreds of people.

[00:32:39] Now I'm excellent in the classroom, I'm excellent as a teacher, but put me in a room full of 300 people I don't know and I'm supposed to make small talk with them. I want to go home. I want to read a book. I'm hiding in the bathroom. So what I started to do was I went with him to all the different things, and I just started to observe what the conversations were about.

[00:33:00] So I went to one or two events where I didn't feel like I needed to talk to anybody, or I just introduced myself. And I realized what they generally talked about outside of work, which I couldn't speak about, was, Um, their sporting events, popular culture things, and things that were happening around town.

[00:33:21] So then, after I went to one or two events, I started to study. I made like a little list of things. So I'd watch some news. I don't generally watch TV. I'd watch some news. My husband and I started watching two programs that were very popular, so I could talk to them about that. And I would choose one or two things that were happening in the community.

[00:33:40] So I'd go in like with a cheat sheet, like a post it note of these three or four items that I could talk about. 

[00:33:46] Penny Fitzgerald: Uh huh. 

[00:33:47] Victoria Chai: And so I would say, okay, on the first one, I'm going to talk to one new person and I'm going to try to incorporate one of these things. 

[00:33:53] Penny Fitzgerald: Oh, wow. 

[00:33:54] Victoria Chai: That was my goal. So I went in and I was successful.

[00:33:58] And the next time I said, okay, now I'm going to talk to two people and now I can do it. But we, we often think that we should be able to go to some social event and become the life of the party out of the gate. Now I'm still not the life of the party, but I am comfortable. 

[00:34:14] Penny Fitzgerald: Yeah. you want to become when you're comfortable, you can get out of your head and just have a conversation and get to know someone.

[00:34:21] Victoria Chai: Yes. So the first couple of times you kind of go in as the observer, like an alien in a foreign language, like what do these people normally talk about? What do they do? Just get curious. Yeah. Get curious. Um, and I think that makes going to networking events. I think it makes going to parties so much less intimidating.

[00:34:41] And it's a 

[00:34:42] really good tip. 

[00:34:43] Penny Fitzgerald: Yeah. That's very interesting that when you said you had a tip for networking events back in my corporate days, um, I didn't know anything about wine. I didn't know anything about golf, but I realized in my corporate job that you needed to know how to order a wine at dinner.

[00:35:06] And she needed to go out. If you wanted to make connections, you were out on the golf course, because that's where all the guys that were in my industry were. There were very few women. So I learned to golf and learned about wine because I needed to be able to converse about these things. Yeah. 

[00:35:23] Victoria Chai: Yeah, it's, it's.

[00:35:24] Not everything's going to be natural. Communication skills are not natural. I learned everything you're seeing today. If you'd met me when I was 20, I would never be doing this. 

[00:35:36] Audio Only - All Participants: Yeah, 

[00:35:37] Victoria Chai: there's so many things we can learn. And if we see it as an experiment and an adventure and an exploratory mission, It feels better.

[00:35:47] Gabrielle Bauer: you know, we can, we can break some taboos. Mothers and daughters can speak about all kinds of things.

[00:35:54] We don't have to have just a superficial relationship. Um, there are some things that we don't talk to each other about, but

[00:36:01] we, we do not have a perfect relationship. It's very close, but also contentious. Who 

[00:36:06] Penny Fitzgerald: does? What mother daughter team would? 

[00:36:08] It's 

[00:36:10] Tara Smylie: perfect. There's something you're missing.

[00:36:12] That's what I 

[00:36:12] Gabrielle Bauer: say. You know, we've had some really hard times, especially, you know, when And even beyond that, um, and it's still hard. Like sometimes before we record, you know, we have an argument about what we're going to talk about and I end up in tears, you know, so it's still not perfect. But the nice thing, I think the beauty is that.

[00:36:33] we're able to work through it. And then we have a lot of fun once we record. And, um, you know, that's part of our message that, uh, in this day and age, so many people give up on relationships, including parent child relationships. You know, they talk about toxic this and narcissists that and boundaries and all that stuff.

[00:36:53] And they just go no contact. I don't know if you're aware of the extent of it, but it's, it's a really big trend. Um, kids going, adult children going no contact, you know, and. That's certainly a direction that we could have taken, um, given, you know, the degree of tension sometimes between us, but we have just taken a different route and that's part of our message.

[00:37:16] Like there is a way to navigate difficult relationships. 

[00:37:20] Penny Fitzgerald: Nice. So your podcast then, is it a way to kind of lead the way for others or are you working together through your own issues out there on the podcast? It's good. 

[00:37:32] Gabrielle Bauer: I think the 1st more. I mean, it's not like therapy. It's not therapy for us. You know, we're not we do want to communicate with others.

[00:37:38] So it is it is kind of to show people. Look, this isn't perfect. This is messy. Um, but we're still we still love each other and we'll still we're still doing it. And that's what counts. And it is possible. to navigate. I 

[00:37:53] Tara Smylie: think a lot of people think that relationships like romantic, family, et cetera, need to be perfect.

[00:37:59] And, you know, you're always getting along. And one of the mainstays of our brand is that like, no, not at all, like hash it out when there's tension, it's okay to express it. And sometimes it can really help and lead to those really loving and genuine moments. Yeah. 

[00:38:16] Gabrielle Bauer: During or 

[00:38:16] Tara Smylie: after? 

[00:38:17] Gabrielle Bauer: Not always, but, you know, enough.

[00:38:19] Eventually. Yeah, eventually. It is, it is worth it. Yeah, nice. You know, and, um. Yeah, that's great. 

[00:38:24] Penny Fitzgerald: I, I, um, yeah, I'm kind of, After listening to some of your, your episodes, you go, you go there. I mean, , 

[00:38:34] Tara Smylie: you hold things batch, you know, we, we do. We think we know what you're talking about and yes, we do 

[00:38:40] Gabrielle Bauer: sex, drugs. We haven't done rock and roll yet, but you know, that's probably coming.

[00:38:45] Penny Fitzgerald: Let's talk wine 

[00:38:46] Robin Hackney: camp. 

[00:38:47] Penny Fitzgerald: Yes. How fun. 

[00:38:49] Robin Hackney: Oh my God. People are so excited. Me too. Yes. Yeah.

[00:38:53] Penny Fitzgerald: Yeah. July 24th through the 26th in Virginia wine country, um, near Charlottesville. Oh my gosh. The place we've got Mount Ida resort.

[00:39:04] Robin Hackney: It's gorgeous. It is absolutely gorgeous. And, um, the homes are phenomenal and the landscape, um, they have a tasting room on site. So people can just hop over there if they want to. Roll back down the hill.

[00:39:24] Yeah, no, it's, it's going to be amazing. They've been so wonderful to work with. Um, so I think it's going to be all around a great experience. 

[00:39:33] Penny Fitzgerald: Cool. Yeah. I'm super excited about our transportation company too. They seem very easygoing and like they're going to accommodate us really easily and work with our group.

[00:39:43] So yeah, it'll be super fun. 

[00:39:44] we'll start everything off, um, Thursday for happy hour because Natch. 

[00:39:50] Robin Hackney: Yes. Yeah. And I like that we're offering some different types of classes too and some breakout sessions and I think that's going to, that's going to charge people up as well. 

[00:40:01] Penny Fitzgerald: Yeah. I was, I was talking about what we're doing, um, with my sassy sisters group. And the question that came up for some of them was, if we choose not, can, can we just drink instead?

[00:40:14] Said, absolutely. We're yeah, there's a tasting room on property. There are several nearby. 

[00:40:21] Robin Hackney: I mean we can do breakfast 

[00:40:22] Penny Fitzgerald: pairings, hello? Yes, breakfast of champions with a little Prosecco and orange juice or There you go, or Prosecco. Our Prosecco and wave the orange juice on over the top of 

[00:40:34] Robin Hackney: it 

[00:40:35] Penny Fitzgerald: and 

[00:40:35] Robin Hackney: yeah, yeah, just bless it with the orange juice.

[00:40:38] Yes. And also with you. I like that. I like that. 

[00:40:43] Yeah. So Friday we will have a fitness class in the beginning of the day. Um, you know, we're still talking about some options. I kind of want to see who all is interested in what before we put all that out there. And then we are going to do a winery tour similar to what we did this past year. We'll have a transportation company come and get us.

[00:41:04] No one has to worry about drinking and driving. Um, so we are going to go and we're going to taste some new wines in Virginia wine country. 

[00:41:12] Penny Fitzgerald: Yes. Some award winning wine. They're, they're really, there, there are a lot of wineries up there and we're going to choose the very best. So come, um, pro tip, pack a bigger suitcase than you need and put some bubble wrap in it so that you can bring home some bottles.

[00:41:31] Um, you'll want to, uh, uh, That's a pro. Pro tip from a wino. Yes. Yes. So yeah, we'll do some tasting and then um, Friday night, it's going to be a little bit more free, free flowing 

[00:41:47] Robin Hackney: as the wine will be. That's right. Right. And we have some group activities, you know, planned as well. We don't want to give all of our secrets and surprises out, but it will be fun.

[00:41:57] Penny Fitzgerald: Yes. Okay. And then Saturday, what's, what can we expect? 

[00:42:02] Robin Hackney: We'll start the day with another fitness class.

[00:42:04] Again, it's optional. All right. And then we have breakout sessions. So my breakout sessions will be more on the fitness side. And then Penny is going to focus more on manifesting visualization, um, how to put all that into action. And you're going to have the opportunity. Yeah, 

[00:42:27] Penny Fitzgerald: I think we can structure it so that people are able to, you know, do a little bit of this, a little bit of that, whatever they like.

[00:42:33] Yeah. Or go taste wine. 

[00:42:37] Robin Hackney: There is no judgment. Like if you decide to skip class, we understand. 

[00:42:41] Penny Fitzgerald: Yeah. Yeah. Or bring your bubbles in as long as you share with the teacher. Yes, 

[00:42:49] Robin Hackney: yes. And then, um, so then Saturday, we, Saturday evening, we are going to have Wine Stock because it is peace, love, wine. You're not going to want to miss that epic party.

[00:43:01] Groovy. Yeah.

[00:43:04] 

[00:43:05] Shrylle Mikkonen: If you're feeling fulfilled and you're happy, that's great. But what happens if that stops? And that's kind of the phase where you're meeting so many of these women that are in this dramatic transition phase of, um, now I'm an empty nester, now my kids are gone to college, now I'm going through a divorce, now I'm leaving my corporate career, and what do I have for me?

[00:43:27] What do I even like? And so I want to tap into women before they reach that phase and help them ask those questions, because it's fun! It's fun to Play with the possibilities and explore your hobbies and try new things. And, you know, so many people think that it's scary or, oh, I couldn't possibly do that.

[00:43:50] I don't know how to bake a pumpkin pie. I'm baking a pumpkin pie from scratch for Thanksgiving. Not a clue how to do it, but I'm going to try. And, um, Um, that's, that's part of the fun and, and with that energy, when you get into that playful place of energy, it creates this happiness and who knows what that can turn into.

[00:44:10] Right, right. 

[00:44:12] Penny Fitzgerald: We, yeah, we don't play enough. Like, think of little kids, you know, little kids are always playing and all the world is like, they're experimenting and they're making stuff up. Like, a rock can be whatever they want it to be. You know, and they play what if we incorporated a little bit more playfulness into our lives, what, how would we create, what would we build together

[00:44:37]  I'm stepping into maybe leaning in even and growing into what I'm meant to do, which I believe is to lift other women up and supporting them and finding their joy.

[00:44:49] There's Spark. And instilling the belief, and sometimes the training or tips on how to move forward with a dream, but encouraging women to take steps towards their older, wiser selves. Sometimes this means putting down old, limiting beliefs. These don't serve us and they certainly don't help us serve others.

[00:45:09] I love telling women's stories and I've also been reflecting on the growth of my podcast this week because November 2nd marks one year of publishing episodes. This is a huge milestone for me. I had the idea of podcasting several years ago, but let life and my limiting beliefs get in the way.

[00:45:28] I worried about the tech. Would I be able to figure it all out? Would I come up with topics? What would I say? And how would I get out there? Good heavens, how much is this going to cost? Ick, I really hate the sound of my own voice. Oh, wow. If you put something out there, it'll be out there forever. There's no way I'm doing YouTube.

[00:45:49] I hate the way I look right now. Maybe I'll wait until I lose some weight. Anyoneelse had self limiting thoughts like these? I finally realized that telling women's stories was way more important. And they also realized that so many of my limiting beliefs were based on ego.

[00:46:06] On me. Ew. Putting the spotlight on other women really helped me. When you think of yourself and your closest girlfriends, don't you see the absolute best in them and they in you? I don't see any of the flaws they talk about and they don't see those in me.

[00:46:23] That's what I'm talking about. We're our own worst critics and I'm working to get over myself so I can help more women and tell more of their stories. I can't believe the number of women I asked to be on the podcast who tell me, Oh, I don't have anything interesting to say, or no one would want to hear from me.

[00:46:41] Absolutely breaks my heart. You absolutely do have something to say, and I guarantee your story will help another person. Someone else will relate to what you have to say, and you might be the one to give them a little courage.

[00:46:54] I hope you've enjoyed this look back at the top 10 most shared moments from the Penny for your Shots podcast from 2024. 

[00:47:04] What was your favorite moment? if you have a different episode that you'd like to explore, let me know. If you have ideas for the podcast, please shoot me a message.

[00:47:13] Um, how about you? You have something to say, and I'd love to help you say it. Cheers, friends.