The Confident Musicianing Podcast
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I’m Eleanor, and together we dive into concrete strategies for the before, during, and after of your audition process so that you can be better prepared and crush that performance! If you’re a music student ready to revolutionize your auditioning, let’s jump in. Tune in every Tuesday for another insight-filled episode; see you there!
The Confident Musicianing Podcast
What I say to myself before my performances
I didn't realise how important my pre-performance rituals were until I slacked on them. Here are 3 things I do/say to myself before my performances.
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Hello and welcome to the Confident Musicianing Podcast. My name is Eleanor and I am a British American oboist studying at the Royal Conservatoire of Scotland literally my dream school and it took me a long way to get there. I applied and auditioned for 12 schools in three different countries. It was a lot of hard work but, oh my gosh, so worth it. I want you to have the confidence to work hard in achieving your goals. So come with me as we go on this journey together. So sit down, pull up a chair, take a seat or, if you're on the go, welcome to the Confident Musicianing Podcast.
Speaker 1:I didn't realize how important it is to have your basic rituals for auditions and performances until I kind of neglected them. So I have been doing so many different auditions and performances in my oboe journey so far. I auditioned for 12 different music schools in three different countries. Um, that had, you know, multiple rounds to the auditions, so that wasn't just 12 auditions, that was many more. Um, I have done many different performances and through these performances and auditions through the good ones and the bad ones, I have kind of come up with rituals that I say to myself, um, and like things that I say to myself to help me feel grounded. And I was doing these things and doing these things. And then when I, a few months ago, I got really, really nervous for my midterm technical exam at my conservatoire and, without realizing it, I kind of just stopped doing the basics of like preparing for an audition or preparing for an exam in terms of like the things that I say to myself, giving myself space, letting myself rest. I just practiced and practiced and practiced. And then when I got to the exam, I didn't feel grounded at all. I felt tired because I had been practicing so much for it and it kind of fell apart and I failed it. So, and and after that exam, I was like hang on. You know, I didn't realize just how important these things that I say to myself are, and so I have a resit. I'm really excited about it. I have a resit in a few weeks. I'm really looking forward to it, and I'm really looking forward to grounding myself and really feeling ready for it in my being rather than just in my oboe playing, and I also have a final recital coming up. So I'm going to be using these things that I say to myself as well, and I think that this is really important to share with you as well, because these things that I say to myself are really grounding, they're really helpful and I want to share them with you. So let's dive right in. The first thing that I say to myself is it's a bit of a mindset shift.
Speaker 1:So every world-class musician was nervous for their audition, performance, exam, etc. You are no different, and I like to think about this. So let's do a little practice thing together. We're going to do a little exercise. Think about your favorite musician in the whole wide world. They could be a classical musician. They could be maybe a different genre of musician. Think about that musician Now.
Speaker 1:Think about the fact that they were nervous for their first ever performance. They were nervous for their second performance. They were probably nervous for their most recent performance. They were nervous for their auditions, right, and you are no different, and for me, that really helps me, because it not only makes me feel grounded, but it also helps me to realize that I could go that far. Do you know what I mean? Like, the fact that I am nervous for this audition does not negate the possibility of me going far in in music, right, and it really helps me. So, just thinking about your favorite musician and then think about their younger selves, like, imagine them your age and nervous for whatever you're about to do in music. And that really helps me because I'm like, oh yeah, they're human too and they got that far even though they were nervous, which means that I can do that as well, and it really helps me feel grounded. So, whoever your favorite musician is in the whole wide world, they could be a classical musician like Albrecht, mayer, hilary Hahn, angela Giorgu I'm just thinking of like cool musicians that I like and then they could also be like, maybe, pop musicians Taylor Swift, right, taylor Swift is probably, was probably nervous for her first ever performance that she ever did. Maybe the second one, the third one, the fourth one, the 60th one, you know so it. So it's really, really helpful to think about that. Your favorite musician was nervous for whatever you're about to do. The next thing is kind of a similar idea, and this is a newer thing.
Speaker 1:But nerves don't take away from what you can do. Everything that in the history of the earth that was like important, there was nerves involved. Okay, if you think of like I don't know, the, the, the famous speeches of the world that people have given the, the ted talks of the world, the um, like I don't know, like going to the moon. You know people were nervous for that. Does that negate the absolutely amazingness of it? Did it stop it? Did those nerves stop these things? No, they didn't, because the people involved like the fact, like the nerves did not negate the people involved like abilities to do these things. And that's the same with you.
Speaker 1:So your nerves, whatever you're feeling, doesn't actually take away from the fact that you know you can do this. You know you've practiced it. Maybe you've done mock auditions or mock performances. Maybe you've just like played, you know, for your family. Maybe you've played for stuffed toys, whoever you've played for. And you, you know that you can do this.
Speaker 1:And, yes, you're nervous, but nerves just show that you care. They don't take away from your ability. Think about it like they're just, they're just added on. Think about like your ability is a cake, right, you Think about it like they're just, they're just added on. Think about like your ability is a cake, right, you're. You think about it like a lovely cake and that is your ability. And then the nerves are like maybe sprinkles on top of the cake or like icing on top of the cake, right, it might feel like it's everywhere, but the fact that the fact of the matter is your the cake is still there, right, your the cake is still there, right, the cake is still there. And when someone eats the cake, they still taste the cake, you know I mean. So when you perform, you still give what you can give and maybe you are nervous, but that shows that you care.
Speaker 1:And I think nerves can often and I mean I'm saying this all of this, and it is much easier said than done, and I do struggle with nerves all the time but the fact is, like nerves mean that you care, nerves can also be turned into excitement. It's the same kind of feeling. So if you think of it as excitement, that can also help. But that does not negate the fact that you have this beautiful thing to offer, you know. And the last thing, the last thing is kind of an activity, not necessarily something you say, but something you decide.
Speaker 1:But it is creating a personal goal for yourself in this endeavor. So maybe the audition is to get into an orchestra or youth orchestra, and that is obviously the goal you want into the orchestra. But you can create a personal goal for yourself. So maybe something that you've been struggling with is performance anxiety, and the personal goal you want is to play your very best, despite the anxiety you might feel, and that's the goal that you focus on, not necessarily the getting in bit, because that's not your choice to make. Whether you get into the orchestra or you get into the program or whatever it is, that is the person who is assessing you. That's their choice. Or maybe if you pass the exam, that is that is not your decision to make. Whether you pass or you fail or whatever you know you you're doing the person who is grading you or who is assessing you or listening to you. That is their responsibility. So take that off right. Take. That is their responsibility. So take that off right. Take that responsibility off because it's not yours. Your responsibility is to play the best you can, and creating a personal goal for yourself can be really helpful for that.
Speaker 1:So past personal goals for me for instance, I have recently switched from the American style of playing to the European style of oboe playing and I did an audition. It was like my very first audition with the new style and my personal goal was to just play to the best of my ability in this new style and to kind of show that I can right. Because I was at that point where I was like, oh my gosh, I can actually do this, because I am switching styles and the style is completely different, like everything's different. So I was like really excited that I could do it. And then, you know, the next audition maybe I was focusing a bit more on my tone because, you know, the embouchure is different, the breathing is different, so my tone had changed. So focusing on really getting a lovely tone, and maybe that is my goal in the audition. And other people are like you know, the people who are watching me are thinking, okay, do we want her in the audition? And other people are like you know, the people who are watching me are thinking, okay, do we want her in the orchestra, or do we want her to do this or that, the other? But my goal is I'm gonna show you this tone that I've really been working on, and so that is a personal goal. So I challenge you to create a personal goal for yourself and focus on that, because the fact that you know that, whether you get into the orchestra or you pass the exam or you, whatever you're trying to do, that is not you know. That's on the person listening right. Your goal is whatever you want to share and that is something that you can focus on Now.
Speaker 1:On the idea of audition prep and all of these things like audition prep, exam prep, performance prep, whatever you're doing, a great thing to help with that and also to help kind of work through the performance anxiety is to plan your practice, and a great tool that I have been using to plan my practice is using a notable practice journal. Honestly, this journal has really changed the game for my practice. It is a great space for me to plan my practice and also reflect At the end of the week. There are also reflection questions that you can fill out and it really helps me to just make sure that every practice session has some direction and is focused and effective. So this journal has really helped me and as soon as I realized that it was helping me, I knew that I had to tell you about it and I knew that I had to give you a code. So use code Eleanor15 for 15% off your journal and let's get some effective practice going. All right, you know that I don't recommend anything, that I don't absolutely love. This code is an affiliate code, which means I do receive a commission with no extra cost to you, and the link for getting your journal will be in the description, as well as the code in the description and the show notes.
Speaker 1:All right, let's do a bit of a recap thing. Every world-class musician was nervous for their fill-in-the-blank of whatever you're doing. You are no different. This has really helped ground me and realize that I can go as far as my favorite musician has gone. The next thing is nerves. Don't take away from what I can do. It's just kind of like sprinkles on a cupcake. The cupcake is still there and you'll taste the cupcake. The next thing is creating a personal goal for yourself, whatever it is. Maybe you know the obvious goal is to pass the thing or get into the thing or get into the program or whatever it is. What is that goal for you? What do you want out of this audition personally? It's really helpful to focus on that. All right, that is about it for this episode. Thank you so much for hanging out with me today. If you did enjoy this, please do share the love, like, subscribe, comment, follow and tell all your musician friends about this episode. All right, I will see you in the next episode. All right, take care. Bye-bye.
