Camping Them Softly: A Dead by Daylight Podcast

8.4.0 Killer Perk Analysis! Michael Myers Buff! Also, Polva! | Dead by Daylight | Ep. 34

• ToxicTeacherTTV • Season 1 • Episode 34

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This episode includes:

1 demon surname.
4th version of AI music.
2 Juggalos invading.
2 killer buffs.
Lots of Nicky.
1 Michael Myers sexual reference!

Send Toxic a message! (Question? Comment? Concern? Survivor main and need rehab?)

Check me out everywhere!

https://linktr.ee/thetoxicteacher

Speaker 1:

First off, mikey ain't the kind of guy to spit. He's all about that silent stalker life. You know he doesn't make a sound, just looms in the shadow Toxic teacher, king of the killer, smiting survivors.

Speaker 2:

Their wines grow shriller, camping them softly. His podcast, divine Survivor mains Go cry online. Amen to the slugfest. Holla, fucking luya.

Speaker 3:

Oh, check it out everybody, I am back, I'm back.

Speaker 2:

Yes, I'm back, I told you, I would be back.

Speaker 3:

Much to your chagrin, I am fucking back from the dead. This is hey, this is the second episode being back after a break. I don't even know the episode numbers anymore, so I think I put 33 on the last one. I'm not even paying fucking attention. Is there a point in paying attention? I don't even think so, but we've got a lot to talk about today.

Speaker 3:

I think I can't, I can't remember actually, yes, this time on Camping them Softly, Do we have a lot to talk about? I don't even fucking know. But what I do know, what I do know for a fact, for a fucking fact, is I have to apologize for the sound quality on the last episode. I went back to listen to it after it was uploaded and it sounded like I was either a mile away from the microphone or I had it in my mouth and I was uh, uh, you know, yeah, any any who, I want to apologize for that. Hopefully the sound quality is going to be a bit better today. I think it will, and so does our good friend here, our good fucking friend I think I'm going to compress her on this shit so we wouldn't have those massive ups and downs.

Speaker 3:

So I think we're good now. I think we're good now. So, dead by daylight, let's talk about it. But first, you know, we can talk about a couple of things. Maybe we'll go into the dead by daylight thing. I'm not sure which one I want to go into first. What I want to do, talk about you know what. Let's go into non dead by daylight. First I want to tell you the biggest, the biggest event that happened to me this week is I got one of those new, uh, smart watches.

Speaker 2:

It's a smartwatch. That's what that is. It's just crap.

Speaker 3:

It's a smartwatch. That's what that is, and the reason I got it was because I was missing so many messages, because I'm one of those guys. I'm to the point in my life where I don't check my phone constantly. That's like something survivor mains do. They always have their phone out, they're always checking their phone. It's fucking annoying. It's fucking annoying. It's fucking annoying whenever you're trying to talk to somebody and they got their phone on the fucking table and they can't even make eye contact with you, because they look at you, look at the phone, look up at you. Oh, the phone bleeped because your fucking Instagram did something.

Speaker 3:

The shitty people that you follow posted something shitty. Because they're shitty and the person in front of you is fucking shitty. They can't look at you and it's just fucking shitty. What in the hell is this crap Exactly? So I wanted to like like you know, I don't check my phone. Then people like did you check your fucking message? People at work, my wife, my friend, like you never fucking text, you never buy this and that and the fucking.

Speaker 3:

I know, yes, I am heavy on these sounds today. I'm just I'm in a soundy fucking mood and I'm kind of sitting back in my my chair here. So what? Where was I going? Oh yeah, so I bought the watch because it appears, at least to me call me stupid it appears that it's more socially acceptable if you have a watch and you look at the watch than if you have your fucking full ass phone out and you're checking that every 30 seconds you can look at your watch than if you have your fucking full ass phone out and you're checking that every 30 seconds. You can look at your phone it vibrates. You look at it. Oh, okay, billy, I have to go because my proctologist is calling. Yeah, so that that's that. That's the biggest thing of the week. By the way, dude, fucking transferring your shit on an android with, like, the SIM card from fucking you know it's, it's a nightmare, it. It took me a full day. I thought I lost everything at one point, but I think we're, we're good now, so I can. So I can do everything I need to do. We're back on the toxic bandwagon. Yes, we certainly are, and that was it for me. So that that's my fucking thing for the for the week. Okay, um, outside, I'm trying to think of anything else. Oh, I did stream a little stalker too, if you guys have played that um me. Do I have a sound for how I feel about Stalker 2? I don't think I do.

Speaker 3:

Stalker is a decent game. The first one was good, but it's not user-friendly and it's like fucking hard to go back to Stalker 2. Yeah, that's so. Anyway, if you played the first stalker, the first stalker just drops you in the middle of fucking nowhere. You've got no there. You've got a tutorial, but it's one of those like early fucking like 2010s tutorial or 2000s tutorial, where you're like you're reading the shit on the, uh on the PDA, but it doesn't. It doesn't give you anything really. And this one does. It gives you more. I haven't gotten really into it. It did. It had a couple of pretty good fucking jump scares at the beginning and the the first couple of things that you fight. Like it was cool and I I think there's something to it. Like you know, I want to get more into it. I don't know if it's going to be as difficult as the the first one was, but we'll see. And the first one wasn't as difficult and just fyi.

Speaker 3:

This a game where you're like in the chernobyl zone, um, after the meltdown, and there's all kind of weird shit happening uh, special powers and weird artifacts and all of that kind of bullshit. So, uh, if you're interested in like single player type stuff apparently multiplayer is coming later to where you can, uh, you can talk shit to people, go ahead and check that out. So dead by daylight, let's get to it. Do I have my fucking new sound? There we go. Yes, and I don't think I redid my news. You know the, the music program that I use, or the, the music site I use to come up with all of the theme songs and music and stuff like that. I don't think they came out with a new model to where you can, uh, you can remaster your old songs into new shit, and it uses the new model. I've noticed it's it, it's ow. God damn it. Fucker, I bit my tongue.

Speaker 3:

Ow, that fucking hurt ow okay hang on, let me get, let me get back to it. I'm not I am not thrilled right now, uh, with what I did. And okay, here we go. Now I need to check to see. Is this? Okay, I want to try one of my old songs. We're doing this live, like back in the day. Remember we used to make these songs live. Uh, is this? This one of my old ones here? I need to turn it up.

Speaker 2:

There we go yeah, there we go.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, toxic's gonna explain this shit. Yeah, toxic's gonna fucking explain this shit. Okay, so, anyway, you can hear the old one. I want to remaster this just to see what it sounds like. Half the time it's good, half the time it's fucking garbage. This could go either way, and then I'm gonna have to talk to you about something else that is really plagued the stream in the past couple of days. Are we there? Are we there yet? Are we fucking there yet? Oh, I have to take out my search. Okay, there we go. All right, remastered the fucking toxic news. Here we go. Let's talk about some fucking news. All right, new version, oh yeah yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 3:

No, he won't quit. Yeah Fuckers. Fucking news, yeah Bitch. Yeah toxic news, oh wow.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah, toxic news, oh wow, yeah, fuck it, fuck it fuck it.

Speaker 3:

I love that part, that's awesome.

Speaker 2:

Oh, it is yeah.

Speaker 3:

Yo, motherfucker. Okay, there we go. Go, that's the news for you. Okay, I love that one that was. That was actually pretty good one. That was a pretty good one. So let's, uh, let's, go to the news. So, on stream I this is personal news, this is not. This is dead by daylight related, but not strictly the game On stream. Yesterday I had a couple of people follow me and apparently their names started with J-R-B and if they're listening, they'll know exactly who I'm talking about. J-r-b. I didn't know what it fucking stood for. I was like, hey, jrb, welcome in. There was one of them, right, it was like JRB, something or other. So anyway, we start talking Boom, you know I'm playing 2v8. I'm fucking miserable the entire time.

Speaker 2:

What in the hell is this?

Speaker 3:

crap. And so we start talking and the JRB stands for Juggalo. Oh fuck, what? Like, I heard the word Juggalo and I instantly tuned out Juggalo. Hang on, j R B. I have to type it now Juggalo. Uh, okay, j R B. Let me see.

Speaker 3:

Juggalo writers. Bitch is what it stands for. Um, yeah, so that that? Uh, so I find out it's juggalo writers. So we're talking about juggalos. We're talking about, like fago, I know a little bit about them. I listened to twisted like back in the day. Uh, you know, I don't, I can't say that they were great, but I listened to them. They're a strange group, right? Can we agree that they're a strange fucking group of people? I think we can. Anyway, so there's one of them and we're talking very friendly Say they're a bitch. Like I called them a bitch, I think. And then they said they were a bitch. And then another one comes in, another JRB.

Speaker 3:

So now I'm really scared. I'm definitely frightened that my stream is going to become a like a fucking cesspool or a breeding ground for fucking juggalo. Face painting, rapping, fucking, you know God knows what. I am not excited about this, and the crowd behind me is not excited either. We're ready, we've put up with enough. It needs to fucking stop here, and so that's one of my biggest fears, and I don't know how far this is going to go.

Speaker 3:

But if this becomes a Juggalo gathering, you'll know you heard it here first is that Juggalo survivorains? I don't know if there's anything worse that I could possibly think of than Juggalo Survivor Mains. Survivor Mains are one thing, right, like we talk about them all the time, but if Survivor Mains are taking the time, what do you? I'm asking Nikki, what do you think about Juggalo survivor mains in DBD? Okay, let me see Juggalo survivor mains. Oh God, I actually need him to curse. Like I have to specify. What do you think? Do you think about, uh, juggalo survivor main players in dead by daylight? Curse a lot and don't censor yourself, bitch. Okay, I wonder if I call him a bitch, is he going to respond differently? Oh, uh, oh, oh no. Oh, oh, good Lord. Uh, no, I said don't censor yourself. Uh, redo that and don't censor your language. Oh, my phone, or my my thing, just went off. Um, it just uh, fucking my, my phone. I got an alert. What do I fucking?

Speaker 2:

do Exactly.

Speaker 3:

Okay, oh no, uh, I have to read this close because this could be bad. Okay, okay, I think it's fine. I think it's fine, let's go to the no, oh God, no, I can't wait. We haven't even talked about Meg yet on here. I was going to. I'm going to do something fun. I'm going to. Eventually We'll do deep dives into the lore of the various characters in Dead by Daylight. So we can. Oh, so you want the unfiltered version? No, shut up, nicky, I'm not ready for you yet. Bitch, all right, here we go. I don't know if calling him a bitch is a good thing. Okay Now, nicky, what do you think about Juggalo survivor mains in Dead by Daylight?

Speaker 1:

Oh, so you want the unfiltered version?

Speaker 3:

Yes, oh, so you want the unfiltered version.

Speaker 1:

Yes, fine, let's talk about these face-painted fucking clowns. Juggalo survivor mains are the goddamn plague of dead by daylight. Wow, they are. They run around like it's a fucking insane clown posse meetup, screaming whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop. Oh, they did that, oh God, no, don't, nicky. What, what, what, what. They don't play the game right. They're too busy clicking flashlights like it's some kind of seizure-inducing.

Speaker 3:

What.

Speaker 1:

I'm an asshole.

Speaker 3:

Okay, so anyway, yes, they did do that. At the very end they went whoop-whoop. I don't know what that means, but yes, I would agree with Nicky. Nobody gives a shit about their Faygo chugging asses. They're too busy clicking flashlights like it's some kind of seizure-inducing Morse code, for I'm an asshole. Okay, nicky, let's keep going. Usually when he goes nuts then he like speeds the fuck up like no other, and I don't know why.

Speaker 1:

How it's stunning the killer. Just a teabag Real original.

Speaker 2:

Yes.

Speaker 1:

And don't even get me started on how they body block their own teammates to farm points or ditch them on hook while screaming every man for himself, ninja. I don't know what that means. Yeah, real family values there, bozo.

Speaker 3:

Okay, yeah, bozo, these fuckers act like they're the kings of chaos.

Speaker 1:

Yep, but they're just sloppy as hell. Mm-hmm, looping, non-existent, nope, stealth. Never heard of it, nope, nope. They get down in 10 seconds and then spam Trash Killer. L-o, l-o, l-o. They chat like they didn't spend the whole match humping a rock. It's pathetic, but you know what? I'll give them credit for one thing they make the game fun to watch, cause when they inevitably eat shit, it's hilarious Watching a juggalo man get face camped. Chef's kiss, fuck em.

Speaker 3:

Okay, fuck em. That is Nicky on Juggalo Mains in DVD. You know what, though? You know what? Though? Let's get serious. They are better than a lot of the walking bags of garbage that are most other survivor mains. They're not bad they were. They were fun to goof around with, they were fun to talk to.

Speaker 3:

So, maybe, like dude, what the fuck like my, my fucking watch is going? See, this is where that I can't fucking with this watch bullshit Like it's going off. My hand is fucking like vibrating constantly, and then you do this like thing where you pinch the air and it fucking delete shit and I have no fucking idea what's happening. What is this world come to? What's this world come to? Okay, so that's one of the dead by daylight things. Okay, that's one of the big fucking things on my stream, but we've got to go to the actual dead by daylight, right? Isn't that what we have to do? The survivor mains want to talk about dead by daylight. That's what they want to do. The survivor mains want to talk about dead by daylight. That's what they want to do. They're the, they're the stick in the mud.

Speaker 3:

Motherfuckers that are just like hey, why would we do anything fun? Why would we go off topic. We've just got to be fucking garbage constantly and just make everybody's lives a living hell, and they there's no other way for them to live. You do realize that, right? That's just what they do every day, every fucking day, every fucking day. Uh, by the way, we've got 2v8. That's one of the biggest things. 2v8 is almost over.

Speaker 3:

As of the time of this podcast, I think there's one more day or two more days of 2v8. Thank fucking God that it's almost over, because I am so tired, so fucking tired of this garbage, because to see eight people, seven people, not doing gens, I can't talk about it enough. How bad this fucking shit is, to the point where I came up with the idea yesterday is why don't we make a song about how fucking bad two versus eight is? And I've got it somewhere. Hang on, let me see if I can. Let me see if I can find it, and it's. It's hilarious because it talks about how far the game has fallen, and I want to go into the lyrics to this. I know we were supposed to talk about real dbd news, but fuck it. Like you know what we do here, you know we don't like we don't stay on topic here. So anyway, here we go. The name of the song is called dead by daylight. How far we've fallen.

Speaker 3:

It's got it's got a good little start to it, right, yeah, let's keep going. Oh yeah, I like it, that's fun. Oh yeah, broken generator scattered.

Speaker 2:

They're doing nothing. The hope is shattered, bitch. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 3:

Cues make us wait. The killer makes yeah Hours for a killer. It's fucking stupid, is what it is. We've fallen dead by daylight. The game is torn apart. Yeah, we're at the end of the start. Bitch Right here Like sardines.

Speaker 2:

Eight survivors lost bitch.

Speaker 3:

But the essence Is the cost. I don't even know what that fucking means, but I love it. This is great, this is fucking good man. Yeah, okay, that's fucking it Hang on. Yeah, packed like sardines, Okay.

Speaker 3:

I've had enough of that shit, anyway, so you can see, even the AI can come up with a decent song about 2 versus 8. It's complete, nasty, fucking, hot garbage. That needs to be done. No, you shouldn't. You don't celebrate that kind of behavior. Everybody thought 2v8 was going to be the biggest thing. They were like, oh my God, this is going to be the most fun we've ever fucking had in a game mode, and it's turned out to be the biggest bunch of fucking pile of garbage.

Speaker 2:

I have ever played.

Speaker 3:

Actually no.

Speaker 2:

I can't say that. I can't say it's the worst, because there's probably.

Speaker 3:

I'm trying to think about the other game modes and which ones might be worse, or like those temporary, because Little Oni was good, let's see, we had Lights Out. That one was good, like the most recent one was not as good, the one with the torches and bullshit Did not like that one as much. And then what were the other ones? Chaos Shuffle was probably by far the best. I think everybody pretty much agrees with that, except for, I think the survivor mains were pretty, were pretty upset about chaos shuffle, which you know, they're upset about everything. I'm gonna, I'm gonna check the dbd forums to see if anyone's talking about 2v8 still or or if, like, I would assume that people have just kind of like fucking given up. You know, um, oh god, oh God, there's a new. Oh my God, there's another. No, I'm, I'm checking the. Uh, I'm checking the forums here and somebody's already said Haddonfield, there's two killer sided. Now, they're fucking stupid. Have the, have the, have the bhvr devs. Okay, see, this is this, is this is funny here, because I just see oh my god, hang on. I I have to read the game gets brighter and brighter with every patch, does it really? They said the game gets brighter and brighter? I don't think so.

Speaker 3:

Okay, here's another one how did behavior fail twice in a row? I think I'm going to agree with this one. It says, seriously, I mean, how in the hell did behavior not fix the lobby wait time for killers? I mean it's ridiculous. To make matters worse, all those quests can't even be done on the killer side. And if you struggle at playing survivor, oh well, it says way too many people want to do the two killers over the eight survivors. That's what one of the responses is, which is probably true. You know there may be, there may be nothing that can be done with this, and it just fucking. It is what it is and that's just what we've got to to deal with on the 2v8. But I, you know it, it is fucking. I'll repeat it, it is what it is. Like I'm never gonna get to play killer. My problem is is that it fucks up the killer on 1v4 because you can't even get into, imagine the 1v4. Like, I don't even want to stream Dead by Daylight If I just play Survivor all the time. What's the fucking point? There is no point. By the way, we do have some news here. We do have some news. We do have some news Shut up for a fucking second Is that we've got some changes to some of the other killers and I want to talk about some of those.

Speaker 3:

I didn't plan to, but I would like to. Let me see here. We've got some when is it? Character's bio pages re-added perks on the preview page. Is this what I want? Yeah, we've got some Demogorgon changes. We've got some fucking Dark Lord changes. We've got some perk updates and shit like that.

Speaker 3:

But in the last one I did not go over any of the killer changes. I don't think which I know that's very sad that I would do that. Um, but I need nikki. I know you guys fucking hate him. I love him.

Speaker 3:

Nikki, give me your thoughts on the um changes to these killers in the dbd 8.4.0 update here. Here are the changes from the most recent patch notes Boink and then boink, and then here we go. Let me see what he says. Let me break this down. Oh, that's what he says. I don't know. Nikki style. Um, okay, oh, wait, no, that's not what I wanted. I wanted to. Fucking I was. I was reading it, I was too busy reading it and I forgot to tell him to curse and shit. No, nikki. Okay, nikki, tell me your your thoughts on these patch notes for killer changes in 8.4.0.

Speaker 3:

Curse a lot, uh, curse a lot, and don't censor the curse words. Okay, there we go, boom and nailed it, and, uh, we'll get to it. You know, there, what I'm most curious about are the myers changes, because he hasn't been touched in fucking forever and hopefully these are good changes. But I want to. I want to back and forth here with nikki on this and uh, oh my God, redo this, but don't censor the curse words. He censored out the fucking curses, which is not good. So while he's talking, he actually has a lot to say about this, but don't censor the curse words. Bitch, tch, here we go, all right, there we go Some. Okay, all right, you're fucking asked for it. Oh, yes, this is what I want. This is what I fucking want. Yes, go, fucking molest it. All right, he's still going, he's still going, he's still going here. Molested, all right, he's still going, he's still going, he's still going here. Okay, there's a lot, there's a lot to these changes. I didn't even I didn't even know that there was this much, because I read the shit about like the hound master and I kind of stopped there. I didn't. I didn't read all.

Speaker 3:

I think it's coming out here in like four days from now. We're recording this on the 24th. So just a just a couple of days from now. We're recording this on the 24th. So just a couple of days from now. Four Is four. A couple, I think it's a couple. A couple is four. Alright, nicky.

Speaker 1:

Hurry up. Alright, you fucking asked for it, so here it is, raw and unfiltered, thank you. These patch notes are a goddamn mess and I'm here to rip them apart, nicky style.

Speaker 3:

Oh, God Please. Dark Lord, yeah, the Dark Lord.

Speaker 1:

Shapeshift Vetna Cool down.

Speaker 3:

Shapeshift cool down 3.5 seconds.

Speaker 1:

What the fuck Are we playing? The Dead by Sluglight, now Dead by Sluglight. This guy's already juggling forms like a goddamn circus act and now they want to slap a handicap on him Bullshit.

Speaker 3:

Oh, what was it before, though? See, that's. The thing is that Nikki's talking about it, but he doesn't. He doesn't go over exactly what the what the change was. So let me go back to the dark Lord. So the shape shift, cool down is 3.5 seconds. It was 2.5 seconds. So that definite nerf, that is bullshit. I will agree with you there, nicky. Yes, nicky, you get the organ there. Oh, my god, you get the organ. Okay, let's keep going here, nicky. What's the next one?

Speaker 1:

Vampire Hellfire Cooldown. Okay 10 fucking seconds. What Are they trying to turn his vampire form into a fucking doorstop? This is like taking the sharpest knife in the drawer and using it to butter toast.

Speaker 3:

Oh, wow, so I didn't know. Like it was seven seconds to do the do the hellfire. They've upped that to 10 seconds. That's fucking nuts to have to wait 10 seconds to use a power in chase. They're, they're gonna be fucking away from you because, like, how long does it take to get bloodlust tier one? Let me see, I don't even know bloodlust tier one, dbd. How long does that fucking take? Bloodlust is a tiered status effect which you guys know about is you know, if you chase a survivor long enough, you get bloodlust. You're going to speed up. So it takes 15 seconds to get bloodlust tier one. You're going to get one shot off and by the time it recharges you're going to be almost at tier one. If you hit it, if you shoot it again and do not hit them the other 10 seconds, you're going to be at fucking tier two of bloodlust. Yes, tier two bloodlust, tier two bloodlust. Oh, it doesn't do the, it doesn't do the second part. You know what I'm talking about. Dun, dun, dun, dun part. You know what I'm talking about.

Speaker 1:

Anyway, nikki, keep going. Wolf form, okay, wolf Buffs. Yeah, faster, pounce.

Speaker 3:

Okay.

Speaker 1:

Quicker. Scent Orbs are nice. Scent Orbs are nice. It's like giving a guy a shiny new bike after slashing his car tire.

Speaker 3:

he ain't winning no races I mean that that's pretty much true, because the that they spawn more and the wolf can pounce uh, quicker, but the the change to hellfire is is complete, complete garbage, so garbage. So, nikki, I'm going to, I'm going to say I'm, I'm, I'm with you on this. I, I fully agree. Now, demogorgon got some surprise changes actually and, um, you know, that hasn't happened in a long time and I didn't even know. I thought, well, since Demogorgon is licensed property, can they just not touch the abilities and stuff without asking Netflix, which apparently they can? Well, you know what? No, now, that well, I wonder if they got the license back and now they could do it. Maybe they couldn't do it before.

Speaker 3:

Anyway, nikki, they changed Demogorgon. Talk to me about this. And I want to talk a little bit before he goes into it. I want to talk about it. So, the portal setting time is shorter. It was one and now it's 0.85 seconds. He goes into portals faster, he travels faster in the upside down, and then there are some add-on changes. So I'm not going to go into that, but, like his portal, shit is actually better now, which is good. He needed it. He needed it, nicky the Demogorgon. Yeah, why is there so much base, base kit buffs. Yeah, base kit buffs. Why are you in space?

Speaker 1:

Now we're talking baby Master portals, quicker entry and a travel speed that'll make survivors shit themselves. Yes, Demogorgons coming through like a.

Speaker 3:

Like a what You're going to go Show me Keisha.

Speaker 1:

No way for me to focus Fuck you. Koosmo, I don't get it what is happening. This is what a buff looks like. Yeah, wait, wait, mickey.

Speaker 3:

You stopped so fast between fucking topics I can't even keep up. Yes, it's like a runaway fucking freight train now. So I'm gonna take that. I will take that as a good thing there, that's yes. I don't have like a simple like fucking, hey, that's cool. Do I not have a sound for like, if something is cool, do I not like, okay, that is anticlimactically. Oh, wow, Okay. No, that's there we go. Okay, that'll be my good one. All right, nikki, with the add-on, I'm going to have to rewind you a little bit because you went too fast. All right, let's keep going.

Speaker 1:

Dead Train. This is what a buff looks like. Uh-huh and it changes the ceiling nerfs. Eh, survivors can still eat shit, but that lifeguard whistle. Change More portals. Fuck yeah, this beast just became the landlord of the upside down.

Speaker 3:

Okay. So what he was saying? The ceiling time of portals has gone up, I guess. Increased ceiling time of portals by 8%. Area effective active portals has gone up. The whistle reveals survivors. Wait what? Increases the number of portals by two. So he got some good stuff. I like it Overall. I like it. No wrong fucking noise. I like it. There we go. Okay, so let's go. So we got some Ghostface changes here. They're doing some changes to Killers they haven't given a lot of changes to in a long time. So that's a little exciting, I think a little exciting. Ghostface Nikki, nikki, nikki.

Speaker 1:

Where'd you go? The Ghostface, whoa, okay. Space kit Buffs, yes. Face kit buffs, yes. Night Shroud. Cool down down to 17 seconds and faster marking.

Speaker 3:

Okay.

Speaker 1:

Survivors ain't gonna know what the fuck hit him. Good, ghostface is back in the game. Baby, yeah, baby, and he's here to ruin your fucking day. Yes, add-on nerfs, add-on nerfs. Philly and matchbook got nerfed. But honestly, who gives a flying fuck face, kid?

Speaker 3:

ghost face is so good now he don't need no crutches, wow, okay is he that good now, yeah, his night shroud, cooldown 17, it was 20, and then he can mark a survivor in four and a half seconds. They took a half a second off there, so that that's actually pretty good. I'll, I'll take that shit right there and uh, okay. So you know, okay, cool, I did, I dig that one. That one's good. All right, nikki, we've got uh chucky up. Next. Tell us a little bit. Oh, there's, there's, uh, there's only a couple of things on chucky, so we'll see. We'll see what he says the good good guy, the good guy Face kit changes.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, shorter scamper. Yes, fuck you. What? That's the only reason this little shit's scary. What? And they made hidey-hole mode slower too, what? This guy's going from nightmare fuel to a goddamn joke, no that's not good actually.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, his scamper time went from 1.3 to 1. Hidey-ho cooldown went up 2 seconds to 12 seconds. That's a 20% jump on the hidey-ho there. That is a fucking yes. That's not good. Sorry guys. And yeah, okay, let's keep going. Nicky yes, he is a nightmare fuel. No, he's a fucking joke. Let's keep going. Nikki, yes, he is a. He is a nightmare fuel. Now, he's a fucking joke.

Speaker 1:

Okay, keep going, brother at a nerfs yeah rat poison got its balls cut off half the range, half the duration. This ain't rat poison anymore, god they. It's a fucking placebo.

Speaker 3:

They did they fucked the hell out of this. Oh sorry, I don't even know if I can say that on stream. You gotta give them that hot dude A wrong button. Am I even allowed to say that? What is their rationale? They nerfed the fucking hell out of this. 8.4.0 patch notes DBD. I need to read their patch notes to see why they would nerf the shit out of that. Did they even explain it? They didn't explain it. That wasn't one of the ones they even talked about. But they fucking what? Oh my God, Like it's bananas. What was the name of it? Rat poison. I need to actually look up this, Chucky DBD rat poison. I need to see what this is so I can see what it was it says. While performing a slice and dice, the auras of all survivors within 12 meters are revealed to you for five seconds. Now it's two and a half seconds, and now you can only see them within six meters. That's fucking garbage man what in the hell is this?

Speaker 2:

crap. And yes, I'm not thrilled about that.

Speaker 3:

That's actually not a very good change. Okay, I didn't expect this like analysis to go on this long, but I'm actually loving the back and forth because this gets me like thinking about it and like bouncing these ideas off. So, anyway, we've got fucking um. Vechna changes now, which I don't know if he got fucking nerfed more or if he got some of his power back. I would assume he got nerfed more. Let's see's see what Nikki has to say about that.

Speaker 1:

Satu talking book. Oh Jesus, the Lich, yes, what about?

Speaker 3:

him.

Speaker 1:

Face kit tweaks yeah, quicker cooldowns for most spells.

Speaker 3:

Okay, that's nice.

Speaker 1:

Cool, they fuck Mage Hand and spell canceling.

Speaker 3:

Oh, Jesus Christ.

Speaker 1:

Now this guy's got to play smart.

Speaker 3:

Does he?

Speaker 1:

And who the fuck wants that?

Speaker 2:

Uh not me.

Speaker 3:

Wait, stop Real quick. So the mage hand is even worse, like that. Oh my god, my microphone fell. I'm so unhappy about that. Why does it keep falling Like I can't keep it up? And I knew as soon as I fucking said that what, hang on, let me see if I fucking how can I maneuver this fucking pile of garbage microphone? See, it won't. It's supposed to fucking stay up on the fucking garbage. Okay, I think we're better now. I think we're fine. Anyway, what happened to Mage Hand? The cooldown is 40 seconds and they increase the cooldown after you cancel a spell to 1.25. It was one second. This is. It's getting fucking ridiculous. What's going on here. Yes, the crowds are fucking pissed right now. Yes, the crowds are fucking pissed right now. Yes, well, that's not angry enough. That's almost funny. I want like pissed anyway. So let's keep going, okay. So so mage hand even worse. Some of his spells have gotten better. So what about the add-ons? Nikki? Tell me about the add-ons, nikki, tell me about the add-ons. It's probably going to be more stupid shit.

Speaker 1:

Pearl of Power and Spell Storing got nerfed to shit. God damn it. The Lich is still strong, but they took all the fun out of his magic spam.

Speaker 3:

What a goddamn buzzkill, Whoa dang it, nikki, you are fucking, you are going off the chain. Yeah, that, okay. So that, yeah, okay. So a couple of things get nerfed, all right. Now Michael Myers. This is the one that I am most curious about, because I love Michael, but I suck with him and I would love, I would so much love, to get better with Michael Myers. I, I would love it. I'm not going to get Michael Myers the hawk tua. Oh Jesus Christ, that's gotta be the worst fucking thing I've ever even like. Oh, michael Myers, hawk tua. Gotta give him that hawk tua. Oh, jesus, hawk tua. Michael Myers, oh Jesus, okay, that's the only place you're ever gonna hear these words. So let, let, let's keep going here. This is awful and I'm gonna revisit this here in a minute. I just thought of the worst idea ever and I'm gonna revisit it. So just keep that in mind. If I even remember, if I don't, you're gonna have to message me to revisit this fucking michael myers moment. Okay, what did they do to michael myers, nicky?

Speaker 1:

shop a talkie. Oh jesus, master of mine what?

Speaker 3:

okay, I think the longer these sounds go on, the more insane he goes. So, anyway, I thought we were doing Myers next. We're actually doing fucking what's his name? Fucking Albert next. So what did they do to Albert, alberto, nicky?

Speaker 1:

A second off virulent bound. Wow, what a fucking game changer Spoiler it ain't. This is the laziest buff I've ever seen.

Speaker 3:

A laziest buff ever. They took virulent bound to do your little dash. There's a half second off that. Okay, there we go.

Speaker 1:

Add on nerf Add on nerf when the glove's going down to 8%. What's the point? This is like changing the color of the paint on a sinking ship.

Speaker 3:

Okay, I don't know that one, I'm just going to keep going here. All right, the shape Now we're doing it Base kit.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, buffs. Yes, holy fucking shit, they gave Mikey the glow up of the century. Yes, faster evil within. Yes, I speed More stock points. Yes, more stock points. Yes, quicker jump to evil within two. Oh, yeah, right, your obituary, those stocking multiplier changes.

Speaker 3:

Yes, fucking beautiful long range mikey is here to haunt your goddamn dreams okay, I gotta go into this because this sounds like it's definitely worth going into. Actually, uh, let me, let me. I have to alt tab back into the patch notes, okay, okay. So let me see. Here it looks like oh well, dude, I accidentally fucking clicked out Okay Patch notes. Here we go. Evil within. Oh wait, no, I'm looking at the add-ons here. Hang on, uh, here he is. Okay evil with that. Within one movement speed has gone up. Um, the maximum stock per survivor went up to 20 points. It was 10. They yes, I'm gonna do that as much as I need to so you can stalk them more before they run out. In my opinion, in my opinion, they should not run out of stock at all. I don't think they shouldn't. Fucking, yes, michael, thank you. All right, so the next um, okay, evil within two is, uh, the. The amount is three. I don't even know what that means. Three. It was five, but now it's three. I don't like fucking. What, what?

Speaker 3:

are the anyway. Okay it's. You're quicker to get to two, which gets you up and rolling faster, unless you're playing with the tier one, meyers, okay. Next, the multiplier when stalking from afar is higher, which is fucking amazing, dude. That's what it should be, because if you're stocking from far away, that's when that shit gets scary. They did decrease when you stock up close, which is going to make those like chase stocks a little bit harder. But I think everything else is this is delicious. This is fucking delicious. Ass shit that deserves a round of applause from behavior. I'm gonna give them a round of fucking applause. They have done a lot of love, but that deserves it. Right there. So thank you, behavior for that. Okay. So now we've got his add-ons. That's going to be the big question mark. So, nikki, tell us about the add-ons. Nikki, are you there? Nikki, come back to me, baby.

Speaker 1:

Aang adaptation, adaptation Shoppe. Chai chai the reworks. Jesus, come back to me, baby.

Speaker 3:

adultation, adultation, jesus okay, they did okay. So they increased on the tough, the evil within three requirement doubled the lock of or the tombstone. What did they do? They increased evil within three. They doubled it on bows. So it's gonna take you a while To get to three, okay scratch mirrors.

Speaker 1:

Speed penalty is a slap on the wrist. Mikey's still out here slicing through survivors like a hot knife through butter a butter.

Speaker 3:

Okay, cool, I'll take it, man. Cool, I'll take it, man. This is freaking cool. Mikey sucks, or no, no longer sucks. He doesn't suck anymore. You can do what you want with him. Let's kill those survivors. Michael Myers, you gotta, you gotta, give him that hot food and spit on that thing. Jesus Christ, actually, I have to ask Nikki. Nikki, I don't know where this is going to go. Nikki, what do you think about giving God Jesus? Michael Myers, I can't, I don't that. I'm typing it, but I'm not repeating it. I just want to see what he says. Oh my god, actually, oh my god. This is dude. This is awful and it's fucking hilarious because it shows that Nikki does not know what. Nikki doesn't recognize what that is Actually. By the way, nikki, can you finish, before we talk about you and the hawk tour on Myers, can you finish what you were saying, please, without Overall yes overall.

Speaker 1:

What? What do you feel? This patch is a fucking mixed bag. Demo Morgan, Ghostface and Mikey are throwing a goddamn party, while Dark Lord and Good Guy got kicked in the nuts.

Speaker 2:

It's chaotic.

Speaker 1:

it's unbalanced and I fucking love it. Yeah, let's see how many survivors rage quit after this one.

Speaker 3:

I like it because I like Mikey, I like Demogorgon. Okay now, nikki, I asked you. I don't even want to. This is going to be a nightmare.

Speaker 1:

You're talking about giving Mikey Myers that hawk to her, like letting him spit some kind of projectile or some shit. Listen, buddy, that's a fucking wild idea.

Speaker 2:

But let me tell you how it'd go down.

Speaker 1:

First off, Mikey ain't the kind of guy to spit. He's all about that silent stalker life. You know he doesn't make a sound, Just looms in the shadow Breathing heavy like he's got asthma or something. You give him a hawk to wah, and it's like turning the king of subtlety into a goddamn clown. Survivors will be like oh shit, mikey's hacking up a loogie and the whole vibe is shot to hell. God damn dude.

Speaker 3:

No, if we're talking balance, a projectile on Mikey.

Speaker 1:

Could fucking nut, no, imagine this. Oh Jesus, he builds evil within. No Gets to tier two. Yeah yeah, bam Bam spits, spits something at a survivor to slow him down. Jesus Christ, maybe it's something creepy. Yes, it is. Shards of his fucking mask away. Survivors wouldn't stand a chance. No, nobody would. But if you don't balance it right, he's gonna be broken. You're right as fuck. Survivors will be screaming in the chat yes, they would Nerf this loogie-throwing asshole. So do I like the idea? Fuck yeah.

Speaker 2:

It's hilarious, but it ain't.

Speaker 1:

Mikey he's a stalker not a spitter. You want to give somebody a projectile, go give it to Ghost.

Speaker 3:

Face. Don't have Ghost Face.

Speaker 1:

Oh, even worse, Mikey's all about the knife the walk and the oh shit, he's right there. Vibes, keep it classy well, that is fucking.

Speaker 3:

Michael myers, uh, hot, oh, jesus, I can't, I can't even. Let's stop. No, no, no, okay. So that that's that for the 8.4 killer changes. So you got it. You got what you wanted there and, yeah, that that's. Oh, my god, it's awful, it, it's fucking. This is, uh, this is disgusting. I'm, I'm actually tired. I, I have worn myself out, I believe, on all of this garbage here. And, by the way, we've got our last segment, which most people will tune out, but I don't give a fuck if you tune out, because it's the best Is. You know our little? You know what I'm talking about. You know what I'm talking about? Right, it's a little thing, and I'm going to play the remastered version of the theme song, which is garbage. This is an example of a garbage ass, how this program actually does things wrong.

Speaker 2:

So yeah, yeah.

Speaker 3:

Okay, it sounds good. It sounds okay Worldwide. See, it does something weird there. It's okay. What are you doing there? What are you?

Speaker 2:

The Parisian Hill. Where are they from? I am global, yeah.

Speaker 3:

Respect my fucking fame.

Speaker 2:

I need that. Yes, mamma Mia Sicily. I'm the king of this shit.

Speaker 3:

Oh yeah, there it is. You know we always go there, so anyway, that was the remastered version. I don't like it quite as much. It didn't do it for me, but this week I would like to thank one of our newer listeners I think this is the. This might be the first episode that they have been here and I would like to thank the city town, cu Dodd, I actually don't know what this thing is Actually. Hold on, hold, on, a fucking sec. I need to like. What is this? It's a. It is a rural municipality. Fucking what, what? In?

Speaker 2:

the hell is this crap.

Speaker 3:

It is a town. Is this really? Is this really? Is this really? It is a town in a new country that we've actually never fucking been in before. Yeah, we are now for the first time in Estonia, polva. I want to thank you guys in Polva for downloading the podcast. We have multiple, I don't know what happened, but multiple people in Polva.

Speaker 3:

I'm a sensation in Polva. I want to thank you, polva, for coming to the podcast, but I'm sorry about what I have to do next. What do you, hey, give me two good things, two good things and five bad things about Pulva, estonia. Curse a lot and don't censor the curse words. Okay, there we go. Nikki I know this has been a Nikki filled episode, but I I have had more fun with this.

Speaker 3:

It's some of the shit he has said in this episode is is beyond, like the shit about Mikey in the hot tub. What did he even even say? He ain't the kind of guy to spit right like. Mikey is not the fucking kind of yes, that's your goddamn right. Um, so, so, yeah, let's let's say, go into more detail, go into more detail, and don't he don't censor yourself, asshole. Yes, okay, there we go. Go into more detail, don't censor yourself, asshole. Okay, he censored himself. He censored himself a couple of times, but he didn't censor himself every time. He's actually going more in detail. This is kind of what I want. And he talks about Satan, which is cool. I love that. He's okay.

Speaker 3:

Okay, here we go. Don't censor the F word. Don't censor the F word. Redo it bitch. Okay, redo it bitch. Censor the f word. Redo it, bitch, okay, redo it. Bitch. Loud mouth, bastard, okay. So there we go. I am ready. Okay, he's going, he's going. But anyway, mikey is not the type to spit. I just I gotta read what it what typed. He doesn't make a sound, he just looms in the shadows breathing heavy, like he's got asthma or something. You give him a hog to it and it's like turning the king of subtlety into a goddamn cloud. I just this is the worst. This is the fucking worst. Okay, we got it, we're good now. Okay, all right. So Pulva Estonia. Nikki, tell us about Pulva Estonia. Yeah, nikki.

Speaker 1:

Pulva Estonia. All right, you loudmouth bastard. Yes, let's get raw and real about Pulva Estonia. Yes, without holding back on a single fuck. Yes, right, you want the good, the bad and the downright shitty. Yes, I do Buckle the fuck up. I'm buckled, shish, shish. Two good things about Pulva what are two good things? One. The fucking nature is unreal.

Speaker 3:

Is it really?

Speaker 1:

Pulva's got some of the most jaw-dropping natural beauty you'll ever see. Does it really? You've got the Tevascoja sandstone cliffs? That'll make you want to weep like a little bitch.

Speaker 3:

Okay, hang on, I gotta look at this, because these sandstone cliffs are supposed to be so nice. Tevastova, toyastiva, what was it? T-a-e? Tevascoja, tevascoja, tevestija Sandstone cliffs what do these things look like? I'm going to give you my first opinion, the first thing I see Okay, this, okay, this is it. Like these sandstone. There's like a bunch of motherfuckers in front of them too. If I don't want to talk shit on our new listeners, but you guys get online, pull up the Taika Shkiva sandstone clips and let me know what you think. Okay, nikki, tell us more about what's going on in the nature of Polva, estonia.

Speaker 1:

The forests gorgeous, the lakes, pristine as fuck.

Speaker 3:

Oh good.

Speaker 1:

It's like someone painted a goddamn postcard and called it a town. Wow, okay, Polva, If you're into hiking, kayaking or sitting on your ass enjoying peace and quiet, this place delivers Cool Two.

Speaker 3:

Cool, okay. Oh, it's not like.

Speaker 1:

Dallas yeah, Does it really In Sikamu?

Speaker 3:

Oh really, Plus there's plenty of old Estonian history. Oh, Estonian history. I don't even know what that is.

Speaker 1:

All that classy shit. What's that? Weird, it's got a personality, not like those cookie-cutter small towns where nothing happens.

Speaker 3:

Okay, it's, given that, weird. There's a weird like background. Ooh, I have no Like that, I don't, I have no like that, I don't, I don't know what. That is okay. So you've got some culture. You've got a cool music festival. I don't even know who's been to this music festival. I actually want to look here.

Speaker 3:

The isker merker, with this language, I'm telling you int, it's i-n-t-s-i-k-u-r-m-u. Insker moo 2 music festival. The insker, oh, they, oh, they have an Instagram. The Inskermoo 2. Oh, 2024, they've got their own website here. Let me see Inskermoo 2, it was in June. Who was there? Who was there? I need to know, oh, it was canceled. Oh, it was canceled. Sorry, sorry, that's not funny that they canceled the festival, but I want to know, like, who's been to this thing. If it's so good, the venue can seat 3,500 people In Screamoo 2. In Screamoo 2. Let me see. Me see here. Okay, I'm on their Instagram. I see, I guess that's Estonian. Um, I don't, I don't see anybody that that, anyone that I would ever like, nobody I would associate with, would know a single one of these fucking bands. Yeah, nobody knows the bands. Okay, so anyway, nicky, let's go to the five bad things. That's what I want Five bad things about Pulver, pulver. Okay, nicky.

Speaker 1:

Five Bad things about Pulver. Okay, nikki. Five Bad things about Pulver? Yes, please. The job market is fucking pathetic. Oh it is. You want to make money in Pulver? What does that sound, nikki? Good luck, asshole. Oh hey, calm down. There's no big industries, no booming business, no, just farming, forestry or a shit ton of commuting to Tartu or Talon. Yeah, talinn's the capital. You're either working your ass off for peanuts or packing your shit and heading somewhere better.

Speaker 3:

Okay, yeah, two yeah.

Speaker 1:

You better learn Estonian or get fucked. What? Don't tell me what to do. If you think you can roll into Parva with just English. You're out of your goddamn mind, Are you serious? The locals mostly speak Estonian. Oh, and they ain't bending over backward to help your clueless ass. Oh no, Sure, the younger crowd might know some English, but don't count on it when you're trying to buy groceries or ask where the fuck the bathroom is.

Speaker 3:

So then the question would be how are they even listening to this fucking podcast? Okay, I don't know Estonia. If you're there, contact me, reach out, you know email, whatever. If you want to be on the show, I'll put you on the show. We'll have a fucking Estonian speaking contest. You can give me an Estonian lesson, I don't care. All right now. Number three bad thing winters.

Speaker 1:

Third winters that'll kick you right in the dick. Oh shit, winters in Pulver are no joke. I'm sure they're not. It's cold as a frozen fuck. A frozen fuck. Dark for most of the day.

Speaker 3:

Yes.

Speaker 1:

And everything gets covered in ice and snow. That's not good, if you like, slipping on your ass while your face freezes off.

Speaker 3:

Oh no.

Speaker 1:

You're going to love it here.

Speaker 3:

Oh no, oh well, Bongos, it says booze and blankets and he said fucking bongos.

Speaker 1:

Okay, what's number four?

Speaker 3:

It's boring as shit after dark.

Speaker 1:

Mm-hmm, it is Okay. What? Oh? You might find a bar or two People stare at you like you just killed their dog, but anything resembling a good time. Forget it If you want to party, you better drive to Tartu, because in Pova your evening entertainment is Netflix and wishing you live somewhere else, I'm going to go to Tartu.

Speaker 3:

I'm going to go party in Tartu. What the fuck is Tartu? What is Tartu? Tartu is second largest city in Estonia. Okay, so how far is okay? So if I'm a Polvin, uh, a Polva to Tartu. This is so weird. How long does it take me to drive from Polva to Tartu? 38 fucking minutes. I gotta go 38 minutes to go to a party. Shit, fuck that man. Okay, so keep going, nikki. What's number five? Our last bad thing Five.

Speaker 1:

Yes, healthcare ain't exactly top notch. Got a health issue, well tough shit. Papa's got basic care, but if you need, anything serious, you're dragging your sorry ass to a bigger city and if it's winter, you better hope you don't slip on the ice and need an ambulance Because you're fucked if the roads are frozen.

Speaker 3:

Are you? Oh well, that's not good.

Speaker 1:

So what's the fucking?

Speaker 3:

verdict Probably bad. Papa's not good. So what's the fucking verdict? They're probably bad. Paul has got some redeeming qualities.

Speaker 1:

It's quiet, beautiful and loaded with natural charm, but let's face it, the downsides are hard to ignore. This is sad that I'm doing this. If you like peace and nature, it's great. If you want jobs, nightlife or a winter that doesn't make you want to die. You're better off looking somewhere else.

Speaker 3:

Like people come in to hear a nice fucking podcast and they're like, oh, he's cheering for me, he's cheering for Pulva. It's amazing, the fucking Pulvan people. And then you're like Pulva sucks ass because it's cold as shit and it's boring after dark and winters will kick you right in the dick and you better learn fucking Estonian.

Speaker 3:

Don't speak English there, they're not. They're Estonian only in Pulva. And what am I even fucking talking about? Like, this is a dead by daylight podcast and this is what it's come to really is talking about Polva, estonia. And, by the way, I want to, I want to jump topics here. We're going to jump fucking topics. Yes, Jump topics.

Speaker 3:

Uh, I, I went back and I listened to the very first episode of this podcast and I sounded nothing like what I sound like now. Like, if you listen to it, I'm like very, you know, this is episode one of Camping them Fucking Softly. There was none of this. Yes, something had not yet made an appearance with us and it just like you know how you kind of come into your own and it's different than it used to be. This is fucking this.

Speaker 3:

Is it right here that we on camping them softly, we have figured out how to embrace the demons and we have figured out how to embrace the fucking chaos and we have figured out how to talk about the walking piles of garbage that are survivor mains. And I want to thank you guys for being there with me. I want to especially thank we have a new number one city that listens to this podcast. Like of all time downloads, most of all time, dublin used to be number one. We now have a new number one. Actually, they're tied with Dublin, so if we get one more download, then we've got a new number one, and that would be none other than Pittsburgh, pennsylvania, pittsburgh, pennsylvania.

Speaker 2:

Thank you for that Pittsburgh.

Speaker 3:

Pittsburgh, pittsburgh, pittsburgh, pittsburgh, pennsylvania I don't even know Pittsburgh, pittsburgh. I don't know what the fuck is happening. There's too much sound in my ears. I can't even fucking make sense of what's going on and I'm tired of it. All right, so I'm getting tired now. I think I've done an hour. We're at an hour seven. We've talked about Dead by Daylight. We've talked about phones. We've talked about Pulva. We've talked about Michael Myers not being a spitter, and I think I'm done for this week. By the time you hear from me again, the Houndmaster will be out. You'll hear thoughts on that. You'll also hear everything I forgot to talk about this week. So next week, on Camping them Softly, you're going to hear some other shit, but for now we have to go.

Speaker 2:

Satan, see us out. Yes, hail your dark lord, satan Williams.

Speaker 3:

I don't know. I need to come up with a last name for Satan that would be funny Satan go, satan, do it again.

Speaker 2:

Satan fucking. What's a good last name? I don't even know. Nikki, give me some good last names. Hey, give me some good uh, last names for Satan.

Speaker 3:

That would be funny, funny. Yes, give me some good last names for Satan. That would be funny, like if he was Satan Jones or something. He were Satan Jones. This is why the podcast lasts so long. Okay, there we go. All right, here we go. You want Satan to have a last name? That makes you chuckle, satan, oh my God Jesus.

Speaker 3:

I'm going to have to play this. You know I'm going to have to play it. I'm going to have to play this. You know I'm going to have to play it. Oh my God, okay. Oh my God, okay, okay, hang on, I have to play it. I'm sorry. If you guys hate Nikki, you can fucking leave, because I love it. I don't care what you think, because I don't do this for you. I do it more for me than for anybody else and you're supposed to do what you like.

Speaker 1:

All right, you want Satan to have a last name that makes you chuckle every time you say it? Yes, I got you, I do. Here's a list of hilarious options for the Prince of Darkness to sound a little more pedestrian. Satan's funny Last name yes, satan Jones. No. Classic Sounds Satan Jones. No, sounds like he's a middle manager at a hell-themed car dealership. Yes, satan McGillicuddy. Try taking the Lord of Evil seriously with a name like this.

Speaker 3:

Satan McGillicuddy. Okay, next.

Speaker 1:

Satan Von Dinkleberg, because nothing screams menace like a name from a cartoon villain. Okay next Satan Johnson, like your neighbor, who borrows tools and never gives them back.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, no, satan Bottomley, your neighbor who borrows tools and never gives them back. Yeah, no, Satan, bottomly Okay, bottomly no.

Speaker 1:

A demon who's perpetually at the bottom of his game. No, satan Finkelstein. No, that can't, but he's got a soft spot for bagels. That's bad, satan O'Shaughnessy. No Hellfire and Brimstone, but Irish as fuck, satan Cheeseworth.

Speaker 3:

Hellfire brimstone. But Irish as fuck. I love that.

Speaker 1:

More cheddar than damnation. What Satan puddlemire. No, how the hell do you not laugh at this one?

Speaker 3:

No, I didn't Satan tater.

Speaker 1:

Satan tater, Small town evil but makes a mean potato salad. Satan tater Satan, fluffernutter, fluffernutter, hey Satan. But there's a sweet marshmallow-y center Satan McChicken. Straight out of the pits of a fast food kitchen in hell. Satan Balderdash, because even evil has a flair for the ridiculous. No Satan Wiggums.

Speaker 3:

Wiggums. No, I want normal names. I want normal names. Okay, so we're going to stick with fucking Satan O'Shaughnessy, I don't want. No, okay, nicky, I want normal last names. And if you want to give him A funny middle nickname, like how mobsters have, that's cool too. Okay, there we go now. Let me see here. I want to see. We were supposed to stop like fucking 15 minutes ago and the eight, um, okay, okay, this is actually. This is good. Right here, this is fucking. Yes, okay, plain last names for maximum contrast. Okay, this is what I want here. Nikki, you have done it this time. We're going to pick one of these fuckers right here. I am excited, I am, I am, I'm thrilled.

Speaker 1:

So you want old Lucifer to have a regular ass last name, but maybe spice it up with a funny middle nickname.

Speaker 3:

Yes, I could roll with that pal. Thank you.

Speaker 1:

Here's a list of options where Satan's last name is just normal, okay, but his middle nickname gives him some flair. Let's do it Normal last names with funny man, man Nickname my funny man, the Satan, the HOA, tara Peterson. He enforces hellish lawn care violations.

Speaker 3:

No, I don't like that.

Speaker 1:

Satan, no show, thompson, no show Thompson, thomas, damnation, but skips the meetings. Satan Okay, satan no show Thompson.

Speaker 3:

I like that Hot sauce Miller always brings the heat. Literally Hot sauce Miller, satan no-show.

Speaker 1:

Thompson. I like that Hot Sauce. Miller always brings the heat Literally Hot Sauce.

Speaker 3:

Miller.

Speaker 1:

Satan Lefty Robinson. Nobody knows why he's right-handed. Satan. Two-toes Johnson. Two-toes Johnson, you'd think he'd have hubs, but nah Satan Big Tony.

Speaker 3:

Anderson.

Speaker 1:

Satan.

Speaker 2:

Big Tony Feels appropriate, if hell is a New Jersey diner Satan.

Speaker 1:

The overdraft fee, carter Satan.

Speaker 3:

Carter, the overdraft fee. Oh, my good Lord.

Speaker 1:

Satan barbecue, dad Harris Barbecue. Oh see, that's funny, but he's grilling brats at the block party. Brats, it's brats, dummy.

Speaker 3:

Satan, smokey, joe, smokey, joe Adams, and not to the eternal flame Satan Adams, not to the eternal flame Satan Adams. He plays it cool, oh my good lord.

Speaker 1:

Satan, the late fee. Parker, no, Shows up late, but still ruins your day.

Speaker 3:

No, I think we're going to go. I either want to do Satan two toes, but I don't like Johnson. Hang on, satan two toes, robinson, or Satan lefty. Satan hot sauce Miller. I like hot sauce and I also like uh. I also like uh two toes because he has hooves and then also like, uh, yeah, that that might be Satan hot sauce Miller. I, I, I do like Satan hot sauce Miller, but I don't like that Miller. Do like Satan Hot Sauce Miller, but I don't like that Miller. I want Satan Hot Sauce. Fucking Robinson. I think Robinson, I like that. I like. I don't like Peterson, because Scott Peterson killed that woman. Uh, satan Hot Sauce Harris. That's not, you have been crowned Satan.

Speaker 2:

Hot Sauce Robinson. I'm done from here. Get the fuck out and save the Hot Sauce Robinson. We'll see you next week. I'm K-Man, I'm Southland, what's it called that? Shit's called Hot Sauce Robinson. The toxic teacher is the host, the host, the man with the most. God teacher, he's the host, the host, the man with the most, all the men that love him. God damn, he's so funny. Toxic teachers, captain Unsolvedly. He's here to play Every single fucking time. Toxic teachers, captain Unsolvedly, making money by being fucking funny. Toxic teachers, captain Unsolvedly, teaching fools, taking them to school. Outro Music.

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