Marriage & Business: Our Journey Together!

Summary

In this episode, Branden and Sammy Sewell discuss the intertwining of marriage and small business ownership. They share their personal love story, the challenges they faced while building a business together, and the importance of faith and commitment in overcoming obstacles. The conversation emphasizes the need for a strong foundation in both marriage and business, highlighting the lessons learned through perseverance and mutual support.

Takeaways

Marriage requires a strong foundation to weather life's storms.
Writing letters to a future spouse can be a meaningful practice.
Commitment in relationships should be based on more than just feelings.
Support from a partner is crucial during challenging business times.
Navigating tough seasons together strengthens the relationship.
Faith plays a significant role in overcoming business challenges.
It's important to be transparent about struggles in business.
Don't compare your journey to others' highlight reels on social media.
Perseverance is key in both marriage and business.
Serving each other in marriage fosters a deeper connection.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction to Marriage and Business
09:32 How They Met: A Unique Love Story
19:08 Navigating Early Business Challenges
24:23 Perseverance Through Tough Times
31:05 Resilience in Business and Life
37:14 Facing Challenges Together
43:58 Turning Things Around
49:19 Lessons from Christ in Relationships
58:41 Finding Purpose Beyond Profit

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Transcript

Branden Sewell (00:01.272)
Hi everybody, I'm Brandon Sewell. I'm the owner of Seal Pro Painting. I'm also the host of the Off the Ladder podcast and we exist to help home service business owners learn so that they can lead well and ultimately live life off of the ladder. Today's episode is going to be with my special guest, my wife, Sammy Sewell. So you just say hello. Hi.

If you tuned in last week to the live of the podcast you would have noticed that We recorded the entire episode. It was like an hour and 18 minutes with no audio. We had the wrong Mic selected and just didn't realize that audio was not recording. So hopefully no technical difficulties this week but this episode is going to be

all about marriage and small business. And it's something that I'm passionate about because I know how challenging business is and I know how important it is to have a strong foundation in your marriage, relationships, or with your partner, significant other, so that you have that strong foundation so that when the storms of life come, when small business gets tough,

that your relationship can weather those storms. And we'll share some, you know, of our personal experiences and what we've been through and, you know, just how important our foundation has been in order to get through those difficult seasons. But anyway, to start off the podcast in this episode,

We're gonna share just our story, how we met, and give you a little bit of backstory there. And then we'll get into kind of like how that led up to starting the business and just, you know, maybe talk about some of the experiences in business and marriage. So I'll just start off by giving a little bit of a backstory because I think this...

Branden Sewell (02:18.678)
really helps to emphasize just the foundation of our marriage and the importance of that foundation and how it served us well. And I'll preface this by saying that we've been together now for 11 years. We've been engaged or we got engaged. We've been engaged. We got engaged into in the or sorry.

in June, Father's Day in 2015.

We met on Father's Day. was the 14th. So we got engaged the 14th, sorry, of 2015. But we just celebrated a year or 11 years of like meeting and being together this last this past week, right? Last week? Or was it? Yeah. So anyway, and now we've been married.

for nine years. And we have two kids, Emmett who is five and Everly who is one. And yeah, so been super blessed. when I so we'll take this back to when I was in high school, I decided when I was in high school to start writing letters.

to my future wife. And I know that might sound crazy, but I wanted to do it because I read a scripture and it said that even while we were still sinners, Christ loved us and gave his life for us. And that just made me think like, wow, before I was ever born, before I ever came to be on this earth.

Branden Sewell (04:19.438)
Jesus was thinking of me. He died on the cross for me and he showed his love for me. And then not only that, he left this love letter, right? The Bible is like a love letter to us. He left this love letter to me. And I read Galatians, no, sorry, Ephesians 525. There's a little inside joke there. But Ephesians 525.

you know, says that husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church. And so I was like, well, how could I show my, you know, my love for my wife like Christ did? And that was one way that I thought of it. I was like, okay, well, I'm going to try and show my love for her even before I have met her, known her, let her like know that I'm thinking of her and trying to like prepare myself for her. And so

started writing these letters and then in June of 2011, I was 18. And I decided that I was going to stop writing those letters and that I needed to 100 % focus on God, my relationship with him, and just growing as a man over the next three years. And I wrote that in that last letter.

in June of 2011, I was like, hey, you know, this is gonna be the last letter for a while. I'm devoting myself to, you know, God and growing in my relationship with him and preparing myself as a man for whoever you are. And that was it. I kept him in a shoe box, closed it up. And then fast forward, I ended up moving to Baltimore. It was an unexpected move. I never came back to Florida.

to get all of my stuff, all of my belongings. And so my friend was storing all of my stuff in his shed. Now fast forward a few years, I met her. We were a blind set up. I met her in 2014, as we said. And it was June. It was Father's Day. And exactly three years later. because we started talking just a few days after my birthday in May. But then we didn't actually meet.

Branden Sewell (06:42.606)
Yeah, we didn't. So I'm basing it on that is the fact that we didn't actually meet until June of 2014. so anyway, I ended up I think it was in September. In September of 2014, I ended up going on a missions trip.

And I was staying, was in, I was in Maryland. I had to come down to Florida and meet up with a team that was going to Nicaragua. And I stayed at one of my buddy's house here in Florida. And he was the one that had all my stuff in his shed. And so he told me to, you know, go look through it. And so I went and I found that shoe box with all these letters to my future wife in it. And, you know, one of the things that I had told her when we first met was,

hey, I'm not gonna marry you or I'm not gonna date you unless I know you're my wife. I had been in a lot of like failed relationships before that were very superficial and you know, so I just knew, was like, okay, I wanna try and avoid going into a relationship that is not going to work.

So I made it very clear like, I wanna know that this is serious, that you're my wife. Before, I don't wanna lead you on, I don't wanna do this by feelings. I want us to have a good friendship and a commitment to one another and we'll base that on what our relationship's gonna be about. So my dad had told me that I really needed to...

take her off the market, if you will. I think that's what he said. then, so anyway, we started officially dating in August, but I guess I still needed this really solid confirmation. in September, I opened that box and I was reading through all those letters. And I read the one from June, June of 2011. And I had kind of forgotten about it and forgotten all the details. And when I saw that I wrote it in June of 2011,

Branden Sewell (09:02.99)
I was just like, wow, I met Sammy exactly three years later. And I was like, I'm 100 % convinced she's supposed to be my wife and we're supposed to get married. So anyway, that was that was a kind of a backstory and how I had, you know, felt like I had confirmation that she was my wife. So I'll let her share some of her perspective one.

what her experience was like when we met. So in May, I had just celebrated my birthday and was in Tennessee because that's where I grew up. I was home for the summer from college and all of a sudden my phone starts getting blown up by a couple of my friends who were on a bachelorette party, scavenger hunt through the mall and that mall is where he worked. I guess they had

I don't even know how that conversation started, but they they had asked me one of that they had to do a picture with like a picture with a random guy in the mall and so they asked if they could take a picture with me and I guess that started up a conversation and Because this is really yeah, this is really yeah, I experienced um I they came up they asked if they could take a picture with me

we ended up taking the picture and then as they were walking away to leave, I, you know, I just thrown myself out there. I was like, hey, if you guys have any friends like this age, you know, let me know I'm single, you know, and so they just kind of like chuckled and laughed and kept walking. And then I was like, wait, you know, major detail here. She's got to be down with Jesus. And, and then they all like,

It was like they running away and then they like as soon as they heard me say that they started running back and so they all ran back over to the kiosk where I was working and that's when they started like asking me a bunch of questions and they were some of them I believe were Christians and and so they ended up you know bringing up Sammy. And so then I got a text message saying

Branden Sewell (11:26.456)
hey, we met this guy, he's gonna be your future husband. When you guys get married, we want credit. So shout out to you guys. I initially was like, there's no way this is anything. They just met this random guy in the mall. How real could it be? I was on the way to a graduation party and my club coaches who, in my head, I was gonna show them the text message and they were gonna kind of laugh it off and be like, no.

not happening Sammy, do not reach out. You don't know this guy. Stranger danger, however you want to say it. And instead what I was met with was, hey, did you text him? No, of course I didn't text him. It's some random guy that my friends met in the mall for five minutes. Again, did you text him? No, I did not. And then the third, my third coach, instead of saying, did you text him? Said, did you call him? And I feel like that third one was finally the, fine, I'll reach out and.

if nothing else, just becomes another friend up in the Baltimore area because I was going to school up in Baltimore. And so I texted him just basically saying, hey, my friends gave me your number. My name's Sammy. What's up? And then when you received that text. Yeah. So she texts me and I was like, I don't know. I was so hesitant still. I didn't want to lead her on or, know, like

end up hurting her. So I was talking to three of my buddies about it and all three of them were like, you need to at least meet her. You'll never know if you don't at least meet her. And so I was like, okay, fine. I'll at least meet her. So yeah, we met and I tell people all the time, I'm like, as soon as I saw her walk up the steps from where I was picking her up and I saw her, I was like, I'm gonna marry that girl.

I just I just had this feeling. mean, like, Sammy had said, we met in June in person, but we had talked a little bit through, you know, phone calls and texts and stuff in May, because we met what was it a couple of days after your birthday? The first text? Yeah. So it was the day that your cousin got married. Yeah. So anyway, it was like a

Branden Sewell (13:51.886)
couple weeks before we met that we talked. And then kind of all of that talking was like arranging to meet and, you know, talking about when she was going to come back to Maryland from Tennessee to visit. She was actually going to a wedding for the girl that we that set us up. so anyway, I think to to back up a little bit when we did start texting back and forth, he went straight to

let me scare her away, let me throw in all the details of like, I'm not looking for this, I'm looking for this. Which, again, he was trying to scare me away. Clearly it didn't work because all the things that he said actually was refreshing. Coming from living in an apartment right off campus in college, very different mindset from most of the guys. And so,

I mean, some of the things that he was throwing out was, like he said before, I'm not even interested in dating you unless I think that you're my future wife. I'm dating for the purpose of marriage, not dating just to have fun. Another thing that he threw out was I don't want to kiss you until our wedding day, which again, for most would think that he's crazy or scare them away. But for me, it was like, okay, you are really intentionally.

pursuing the relationship, not pursuing the physical, which was very refreshing and exciting and enticing, I guess. So, I mean, you know, to give a little bit of like backstory there, I was trying to like protect her in one way. And secondly, I just like in my past relationships, as I said, it was very superficial. It was like

it was like all like feelings and and all that and you know when you're caught up in feelings and like the emotion of things you can't think straight and make decisions that are you know like on based on things that are deeper than than feelings and so I knew that I wanted to pursue my future wife and it to be based on something that was deeper than feelings.

Branden Sewell (16:14.702)
Because as we all know, feelings come and go. You can be like, you know, we're not like, we fight, we argue, we get mad at one another. But because we understand like, hey, we're we we say this, like we choose one another. Every day. It's not like, hey, I'm with you until the feelings gone. It's like, I'm going to choose you even when

when I don't feel all those like giddy feelings, know, sometimes like I annoy her and she annoys me and even in this conversation, even in this conversation, like, you know, we have little things like when she brought up the detail of like May earlier, I was like, why, does that matter? But anyway, it's, you know, so there's, there's always going to be moments where

we face challenges and really that's what this whole episode is about is that like, you have to build your relationship, your marriage on something that is stronger, a foundation that is stronger than just your feelings. And you know, can just, you can be deceived by your feelings and your emotions. And you know, the Bible says that the heart is deceitful. And

And so, you know, I just, I knew for myself that that's how I wanted to go into our relationship was, hey, I'm very intentional. This is exactly what I'm looking for. If you're not interested, then don't waste my time. I won't waste yours. There's no sense in doing this whole like, hey, let's just see how it feels type thing because

I like, I don't want it to be based on feelings. So that doesn't matter. Like, I'd rather base it on like, commitment, covenant, principles, you know, things that are more important in a relationship and in marriage than the feeling side of things. Because I was like, you know, that will come and go. Like, I mean, the reality is, like,

Branden Sewell (18:40.494)
who we are even, who we were when we met, we've changed a lot over that time. Like I was a lot skinnier and, you know. My hands were tougher. Yeah. But anyway, you know, all of that superficial stuff changes and then all that you really have left to base your relationship and marriage on is like that foundation. like,

that served us really well in our marriage and life and through being a business owner. so getting into the business side of things now. You know, when I started the business, I came down here in August of 2017 and we were also helping start

slash plant a church in southeast Orlando. There was some challenging things with like getting the business started. Obviously the learning curve of starting a business and it was like all we had to rely on. So she right away. Yeah, when she initially came down here, she had something lined up that that fell through. And the only thing that I was doing was

helping start this business with a couple of business partners. And that's like what we had to bank on. We had savings and so we paid a few months in advance in our rent. So at least that was covered. But then it was like, okay, hustle time. Now in those first few years, it was really rough. Like I remember one year, my take home pay was like $13,000.

because that's like, because we were getting a business started. And you know, she eventually found a job, you know, working at Orange Sherry and she's been there ever since but, but anyway, those early years were super challenging and like, so if we go back to that season, it wouldn't have even been possible to start the business.

Branden Sewell (21:07.21)
if it weren't for Sammy because Sammy was she had like the job that was bringing in like a steady reliable income. And I was out there hustling trying to get this business going and like build momentum. And and like we said, like that, like the first few years were really rough. And I couldn't have done that. Like, I'm sure there are.

marriages out there where like a spouse and if this is you, I'm sorry if you're listening to this and this is your situation. I'm sorry that you're experiencing that and but I'm hoping that we can give you an example of like what something healthy looks like. And so I'll share this and then I'll let Sammy share her perspective but in the early years of getting the business off the ground

The only reason that was possible is because she didn't like, never, like, I never felt judged by her. I never felt like belittled or, you know, just she never made me feel bad for where the business was at or the challenges and the lack of income. She was always very supportive and

you know, even if maybe she wanted me to quit, she never said it. You know, I'm sure there might have been and there may still be like times where she dreams of me, you know, quitting this but I do the same thing. I dream of it often. But I won't let myself but anyway, so it's just, you know, having that, that trust from her having that commitment.

that like, even though it was hard, like I never questioned whether she would be there. I never questioned whether she would walk through those challenging times with me. I just had that, had that, that trust in, you know, not in myself, but I had that trust in her. Like I knew she was going to be there and I never had to wonder about that because we had a great

Branden Sewell (23:30.146)
foundation. was like, know that this woman is by my side, come hell or high water, you know. And so anyway, I'd like for you now to share your perspective on like, why, you know, why were you that way? Why have you like, even in those early days, when it was really challenging? What was it like for you to go through that?

what thoughts maybe did you have and this might be the first time for me to hear some of these things. But anyway, yeah, like what was that like for you and how did you get through that season and and not like make me feel any type of way for doing this? Yeah, I would say I as I'm listening to you speak, actually reminds me of a piece of advice that I gave to a member actually a couple years ago when I actually was talking to them.

this past week as a reminder of this, of you don't quit in the valley. The valley is not the time to throw up your hands and say, don't know, it is the time to throw up your hands, but not in surrender to the world or the situation, but rather in surrender to Jesus and in surrender to God that he has the keys to unlock what's next.

He has the keys to the door to open it up to allow you to go through. And when you get to the mountaintop, you praise him. When you're in the valley, you praise him as well, no matter what. And I think some of that was revealed to me in my years of gymnastics of I am very open about that I was a massive head case with gymnastics. was the one with many fears of things that I'd been doing for years with no issue. And all of sudden I...

can't get past my head to do the same skill I've been competing for five years. But I think that's something that my parents instilled in me was that in those times that it's tough, that's not the time to give up. It's the time to push through and persevere and keep pushing and keep driving. And then when we get to the other end of that fear, then we can have a honest, more level-headed conversation because when you've got fear in front of you,

Branden Sewell (25:48.6)
the outcome of what decision making that you're gonna have is not necessarily the best, not necessarily the most...

it's not the smartest decision to move forward. It's fully based on fear. And then when you get past that and look back at that decision, you question and wonder, should I have stuck it out? Should I have pushed a little bit further? What would have happened if I had persevered a little bit longer? And so that kind of comes to mind when I think of the tough times. And when we say tough times, like there were times that dinner was if he caught fish and brought it home. Well, that was later on down that was like,

still in the early years, though it was like, you know, like bills were really tight. It was like, my goodness, how are we going to, you know, pay for rent this month? Or how are we going to, you know, pay these bills and how are you going to buy groceries? And so we've had those seasons for sure. But, you know, God's been faithful through it all. you know, as she was sharing about her career with gymnastics, you know, I thought of

You know, like I obviously went through challenging times too. Like it wasn't easy for me to know that I in those early years was the source of like a lot of struggle just because of the business and I can remember this is being pretty vulnerable, but I can remember one time like I needed a coach so

I was hiring a coach and I remember just like breaking down, crying on the phone to this guy that I was going to hire as my business coach and just like feeling terrible because I felt like I was failing my family. And so that was like a real like tough season for me. And I told him on the phone, I was like, look, if you can't help me turn my business around in four to six months, I was like, I'm done. I can't do this to my family anymore.

Branden Sewell (27:54.638)
And so anyway, I've been through some really low times and as she was talking, I was thinking about the sport that I've done my whole life, which is surfing. obviously surfing, a lot of times when I'm going through challenging seasons, I think of surfing because, and what it taught me as a individual, surfing, like most people,

Well, there's such a small population that knows what that sport is like, the challenges of it. I mean, there's a lot that goes into that. It's literally like life threatening in some situations. You you're dealing with, you like you got to think about like sharks and, you know, marine life that can hurt you. And then you obviously think about drowning, which I've had multiple close calls in my life.

And so I think back to like, you know, when I was a kid and I was learning how to surf and, you know, having like paddling out, you know, and like one of my first like the some of the biggest days that I've ever served, whether it was Hurricane Swell or in another country and like paddling out and looking at these huge waves and fear like

you know, just absolutely gripping me and wanting for nothing more than to just turn around and paddle back to the beach. But then having to say like, dig down inside of myself and, you know, push past that fear, you know, take wave after wave, going under them, trying to get out. And then like, once you finally get outside of the break,

and you're sitting out past the breakers and you're like, okay, I finally made it. That's a really great feeling to have, but you don't get to experience those moments of joy and accomplishment if you can't take the waves. And it's the same with, you fall on a wave. Just from some science here for you, I think it's like every cubic foot

Branden Sewell (30:12.394)
of water is 60 pounds. And so like, imagine paddling out on, you know, a really big day, and you've got this huge wall of water on you, it's so much power. And, know, just, you know, I think of like times where I've fallen, got absolutely like, drugged on the bottom of the, drug on the bottom of the ocean floor, like slammed and held down and, you know, thinking I was going to drown.

And then coming back up, finally getting that gasp of air and being like, okay, am I going to go sit on the beach or am I going to paddle back out? And having those moments where you decide to push past that fear and paddle out again is like, those are the lessons that I've carried with me, even in business. I'm like, okay, it's really hard. It's really scary. It's tough right now, but

just like in surfing, I'm gonna fall down, but I'm gonna get back up and I'm gonna paddle back out. Yes, I see the waves coming at me and they're breaking in front of me. sometimes as I'm trying to get out, they're gonna break on top of me and take me for the ride of my life. And then I'm gonna get back on my board and keep paddling. so, sports obviously can teach us a lot in life. And I think it's done that for both of us.

and in some really challenging sports for sure. you know, just to fast forward. So obviously we had those really difficult seasons in the beginning where it was like I wasn't making much money. I'll fast forward to, and the other reason I want to share this is like some of you might look at me or look at my business and because of everything that I share.

online to think like, wow, you know, he's arrived, he everything must be easy for him, or he must not have any challenges. And that's not true. Like, have I overcome some things? Yes. Have I, you know, encountered new challenges? Absolutely. And are those challenges different and in some ways harder now than they were back then? Absolutely. And so it's just

Branden Sewell (32:32.546)
Don't look at someone's highlight reel on social media and think to yourself like, man, they must have it made and it must be easy and it's challenging. And like, yeah, we've had some wins, but it's still hard. So anyway, I wanna be vulnerable and share some of my struggles with you. So if you listen to my podcast, you've probably heard like in...

2022, we had a really, really rough year. 2020 was actually surprisingly good for us. It had its challenges, but it actually turned out to be like a real blessing financially. you know, and then 2021, the business grew. And in 2022, we were looking at growing again. But then that's really where I made some bad

financial decisions in business and you know, some of those things were just like silly and I've talked about it before but you know, I'll let you jump in in a second but I had these fears because of like having the early struggles in my business. I had learned that okay, once you've kind of like figured out okay,

you know, your business is working, like business is coming in, then it's like refining, you know, things. It's like working out the kinks, working out mistakes, like, and all that. And one of the things that I learned is like, okay, I hadn't taken on any debt in the business in the beginning. But I kept hearing from business owners who were more seasoned than me, that in order to grow, I needed to leverage debt, and I needed to, you know, utilize debt to grow. And it wasn't a bad thing. So

In 2022, I, you know, went out and I bought new vehicles for the business and finance them. I took out a loan. And then instead of like using that money that I for the loan to pay for the vehicles in full, I use that money that I got and I put down payments.

Branden Sewell (34:56.034)
So then it's like I still had to make the payments toward the loan that I got for the business and the loans for the vehicles. And so that would actually really, really eat at my cash flow in 2022 and made things really rough. But it was a really, it was a dumb mistake, but it was a mistake I made. And ultimately it led to me

losing all of my employees between like, we were on pace to do over a million by like May of 2022. By like the end of June, I went from having 13 employees down to having two. And then I think by like July or August, I let the final two go. And then by like September, October timeframe,

My numbers went from being like 90,000 plus down to I think like my worst month in October was like $10,000 in revenue. And so it was really rough and had to get rid of all of my vehicles, started like trying to just sell stuff. I mean, do you remember how stressful that was?

Like I think there is this is being really transparent, but I think at one point like you were even at risk of losing your license or your license being suspended because of like one of the vehicles. I don't remember what was going on with that. Or was it my license? I don't remember. Remember with the frontiers like something we had to pay and if we didn't pay it.

Was it like the registration? It was the registration. Yeah. And so it was like, if I didn't pay that, then, you know, we were going to be in a bad situation. anyway, it was super stressful. like, we were just like doing anything we could to like sell those. And obviously with them being work vehicles, we were upside down on them and it was just bad. It was rough. So

Branden Sewell (37:14.472)
share all of that to like hopefully encourage you that like, hey, maybe you haven't been through a season that was that hard, or made those like dumb mistakes that I made, I made them and still like, turn my business around. And it took four months to do it. And, you know, but in that season, like, I even went to her, I went to Sammy, and I said, Hey,

I have to be honest with you, like, I'm not sure, but I think I might have to file for bankruptcy. And so if you could like tell, tell the listeners like what that season was like for you, maybe what some of your thoughts were, fears, or if you had any, all I can say is like, I only ever felt support. I just like felt like you trusted that I was going to turn it around. Yeah.

I kind of had the mindset of if we file for bankruptcy, we file for bankruptcy and we'll figure our way through it and God's going to carry us through it. But also there's a part of me that didn't think that that was going to be the need. Not because I thought we were better than that. That was not the case. I knew that there were a lot of challenges he was facing. But I just think of so many times that

He would come home and be like, babe, we need this to come through. Otherwise I don't have the money in the bank to pay payroll. well at the time it was like material or to be able to pay for material. Like I need to buy X amount of money or X amount of dollars of material tomorrow. And like if I don't sell a job today, I'm not going to be able to like pay for material plus pay. Right. guys.

Every time that you came and said that, it was, hey, babe, I need you to pray for it. And being 100 % honest, I would say yes, and I would on some, and there were some that we were both going through it stress-wise, and I forgot. But I knew that God heard, God knew our heart, God knew what was going on, and I had trust and faith that He would provide. And the number one thing, though, was that when He provides,

Branden Sewell (39:40.684)
we don't take credit for it. It wasn't by anything we did. It wasn't by anything that a customer did. was truly that God provided in that moment. And I know you can probably attest to this of every time that you said, my gosh, babe, this came on. The response was, praise God. Thank you, Lord. Because that's, He provided, we didn't. It wasn't by our strength and it wasn't by our means. It was...

him intervening and stepping in for it. But I also knew that even if it did go a different way, I chose him. I wasn't in it because of feelings, though I do have those feelings. sickness and health, richer for poor, we will figure it out. We will find a way through it.

God will provide every step of the way. It may not be elaborate, it may not be everything as far as what we envision it to be, but it will be everything that we need. Yeah. You know, it's like when we were going through that season too, I'll just share this from my perspective. It was a very lonely season for me because, you know, one thing like as a business owner, obviously you have to take ownership of like whatever happens.

but you're also as a business owner taking risks that most people are not willing to take or won't. won't see. Yeah, and they don't see those sacrifices either, yeah, or the risks. And so what was really challenging for me was I knew that yes, it was my fault that I was in that situation.

But it was never intentional. I never intentionally went out and was like, hey, I want to fail as a business owner. So it was really challenging. then people that I thought would employee specifically, that I thought would stand by my side, would walk through that with me, were just like, they were gone. And some of them, I remember there were people that were friends of mine.

Branden Sewell (42:01.654)
like that I've had for since I was a teenager that worked for me. There were, you know, people who were other believers that I knew through a church that I went to. And so like those that that hurt me more than anything else, you know, it was super challenging because it was a really hard time. And I guess what I learned in that that season is like,

really like you can't expect anyone as a business owner to care or carry the weight of your business in the way that you're going to. It's just the way it is. People that you think are going to stand with you won't. So anyway, just wanted to share that. That was really challenging for me. But anyway, I also wanted to share in that season,

We did whatever it took to turn the business around. I remember I used to, so I'd work all day doing estimates and then I signed us up to do Uber. So one of the things that I had done is I had gotten rid of my truck and I had gotten a Honda Civic. And so if I wasn't doing estimates for the business, I was doing Uber. And so I would...

Like I'd go do an estimate and then I'd turn on Uber in that area and I'd go like deliver people their lunch or pick somebody up and take them somewhere. And that's how I made like a little bit of extra money, but still had the flexibility to get the business going. So like all the money really that I was making in the business was like staying in the business, just trying to like recoup and you know, just survive and get things back to where they needed to be.

And then the Uber money was like what was just helping us survive. And so she would get off work, we'd pick Emmett up and we'd load up into the car as a family and we would Uber the rest of the night until sometimes nine, 10 o'clock at night. Yeah, Emmett would fall asleep in his car seat. You know, and Sammy and I, obviously we didn't do Uber lift in the evening. We just did Uber.

Branden Sewell (44:28.426)
Uber Eats and it was it was funny because it was kind of fun like we'd be like, you know, like racing to get these Uber Eats deliveries and like, getting excited when we had like, you know, tips and just seeing some of the money that was coming in because we were like desperate but but it was like we were it was like, you know, you just do what you have to do to survive and and the other thing is is like, you like I have to be humble I couldn't be

like, oh, I'm a business owner, Uber is beneath me. It was like, I'm going to do whatever I can do to make money and, you know, provide for my family. And so, you know, that that's what I did. And we were able to turn the business around. And by I think it was like, January or February of 2000 and

23, I had hired on my first employee again. And he actually still works for me to this day. And he's actually been a big part of helping me like, you know, grow the team again. And and so anyway, now we've we've been able to turn things around. And I will say this, even in turning things around, I've had challenges like it's not always easy.

You know, I just came through a season where I was like fighting to make payroll because I had some nightmare jobs that we did the beginning of this year that did not go as planned. We had to like get unexpected equipment to get the jobs done, unexpected materials, unexpected timelines. so it just, you know,

we actually lost a lot of money on three jobs, big jobs, three of our biggest jobs of this year. And so it made the beginning of this year very challenging and in particular the last month. So anyway, those challenges come and that's just part of business. And I hope that as you're listening to this,

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episode, you're encouraged. And I hope that you're inspired. I hope maybe there's like something that you've heard that encourages you for your own marriage, your own relationships, and maybe gives you like a fresh perspective. And, you know, maybe you haven't had it like we have. But I would encourage you like

you know, not to try and like push this on you, but obviously Christ has been our foundation and that makes it, we have a great example in Christ of like what humility looks like of sacrifice and service, what love looks like. You know, it's, you you think of, okay, like we're going through these really challenging times and I'm like the one to blame because it's my business and

You know, I'm the reason for some of the struggles that we've been through. you know, Jesus is the example, like I would say for Sammy on how to love me through that. And probably in moments where I've been maybe unlovable. Because I'll be honest with you, like with the stress of the business sometimes, like I've had seasons where it was like,

absolutely like soul crushing and debilitating. Like I remember in 2022, like sometimes it was hard for me to just like, you know, once the day did end, it was like hard for me to like, sometimes get up or, you know, some mornings it was hard for me to get up out of bed or there was also moments where it was hard to go to bed.

Branden Sewell (48:51.79)
also, personally. Yeah. Yeah, there's a lot of challenges. But anyway, all that to say is, you know, if if you're wanting to know, like, okay, maybe you've you've heard this, and you're like, Wow, I, how do you get there? I would just say it's, it really is it's pursuing God and, and really trying to

take his example and apply that to our lives and how we, you know, serve one another. And it's so funny, kind of going back into earlier in the episode, I brought up the scripture, Ephesians 525. And when we first got married, we made these frames and they're gold and then the, it's like a chalkboard.

and we wrote with chalk markers, Mr. and Mrs. and then we put, we each put a scripture that we wanted to like represent, you know, our role in the marriage. so Sammy wrote hers on her frame and it's hanging on her side of the bed and mine is on my side. And just recently, it was like in the last like, in the last year, maybe within the last six months.

I don't know what inspired it, but I was like, I'm gonna look up that scripture. And I looked up at the frame and I like flipped in my Bible to Galatians 5.25 and I was like, that is not what I thought it was. It said like, basically something about like, know, living according to the Holy Spirit. I was like, whoa, where is this? And I was like, it's Ephesians. So for the last, you know, nine years,

I've had Galatians 525. I'll look it up and read it really quick. I've had that hanging on the side of my bed and it's still a good scripture to live by and a good example, but it's definitely not what I thought it was. And so let's see, Galatians 525.

Branden Sewell (51:14.862)
25. Since we are living by the spirit, let us follow the spirits leading in every part of our lives. But that's still still good. A really good example. Follow the spirits leading in every part of our lives. And, you know, so I could argue like in my marriage, try to let the spirit lead me and look, I don't want to, you know, like, make you think that we're perfect. Because we're far from it. But

goodness, I can't imagine where we would be without Christ and our marriage. Because those things that would break us, those things that would cause us to maybe call it quits or like, you know, whatever that looks like, it's like, we're able to get through those things because of Christ.

So like even when I have a bad day, bad month, bad year, bad years, know, Sammy is able to love me like Christ. And when Sammy never, she never has really bad days. No, I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. But she is definitely like, she's like an angel. She's a saint. So hers are much, much less.

than mine. But like I can still love her. I think to that point too, of our relationship. And I use the example of my grandparents and I talked to my grandma about this, I guess it was a few years ago. But her and my grandfather were married for more than 60 years.

One thing that she mentioned is there's gonna be bad days, but it's really cool to see how God Allows you to support each other that it was always or it always seemed to be that one was Having the bad day and the other had the opportunity to pick them up and you know not to say that we've never had a bad day together We have had we've had several but at the same time

Branden Sewell (53:30.658)
The majority of those bad days are the majority of those hard situations where you really need to draw from the strength of somebody else. One was at a low and the other was at an okay point to be able to be that person to lean on and that strength to lean into and vice versa. I've had my fair share of bad days of coming home going, I don't know what I'm doing, why am I doing this, what's going on? And he was able to be that strength for me.

although I feel like you probably don't realize how strong you've been for me in the process. not. But we've been able to lean on each other and that's what a good marriage is. It's not one-sided where one person is always the pillar and always the strength. It goes both ways. I'd also say like this is something that I love to reference because it helps me so much is and I think it's a good representation of like just commitment.

beyond feelings is I've, I've opened Sammy's car door for her. ever since we were dating and I told her like, yeah, ever since the day we met. I've said like, if I am about to get into a car and I haven't opened your door, just stand there until I like realize you're just standing there. And so it's happened a few times, but I would say like, I could probably only count on one hand where she's standing on the other side of the car. I'm like,

but but hold on, let me finish my thoughts. One, like, one of the absolute hardest times to do that is when we have just had like an argument and I'm mad at her. Like you have no idea the level of self discipline that it has taken.

in moments where I have literally like I could have like slammed the door on her or like in her like in your face or like behind you. Just so frustrated with her. And I have to like swallow my pride, walk over to her door and be like, I've never not opened her door. And it's not going to start today. And I go over and I open her door. And she gets in and she always says thank you.

Branden Sewell (55:53.966)
And I always shut the door and I'm like, that was the hardest thing I've done today. But what I've learned in like through doing that is like for me, that's like a symbol of like, hey, I'm choosing my wife, regardless of how I feel in this moment, I'm choosing to do something that I don't feel like doing, but I'm doing it based on my commitment to my wife principle.

covenant with my wife, like, I will always open your door for you. And, and so that's like, something that helps me, you know, get through like hard times or hard seasons, like where we're like, really mad at each other. And I would say she's really great at, like, she could be fuming mad at me.

and still like do something nice for me. Like, I think we had an argument yesterday or today, and she's like making my coffee for me. I'm like, why are you making my coffee for me? I just want to make it myself. And but she'll like, you know, so she's like making me breakfast and like making my coffee while we're both mad at each other. And, you know, so I think in those moments,

You know, like I can be, you know, really mad at Sammy or be frustrated and I know like, okay, I've got to do something to serve her to get past this. It be like doing the dishes or like, I don't know, it could be some things like taking out the trash or whatever. But I'm like, okay, I've got to like, I don't want to do this for her right now, but I'm going to do it anyway.

So anyway, think, you know, how do we learn all of that through Christ? It's like the dying to yourself. You know, the Bible talks about it a lot, especially in the Gospels, just about picking up your cross and dying to yourself daily. And so that's obviously what we do in marriage.

Branden Sewell (58:15.822)
is we have to learn to die to yourself and who are not perfect at it. She's better at it than I am. But I still do it sometimes. But anyway, you know, anything else you want to add or? I actually because I'm looking in this direction, there's a book on our bookshelf that I had forgotten that we had. It's called serve to be great.

It's the book that I think it was. It was talking about like the mindset when you're trying to achieve greatness is typically a little bit more of the self-serving or the selfish piece. But the true beauty is when you learn to serve others in the process and that actually God uses that to unlock more of not looking at it as like prosperity piece, but looking at it as

where we really get some of the gratification and sense of purpose is not in the money that is brought in, but the relationships and the opportunities to serve others. And I think that's something that we both do with intention with each other that can be brought into everything that you do, whether it be marriage, business or anything in between. Awesome. So I don't know how we went 18 minutes longer.

on the last episode, but we're at about an hour now. So I'm gonna, I think we've covered a lot of really great, great stuff. And hopefully this will be a really encouraging episode to those of you who are listening. And please feel free to reach out. Like if you just need some encouragement, maybe you're in a tough spot in your marriage and you just need somebody to like talk to you about it.

Maybe you need some ideas of how to get through a challenging season In your marriage, I'd love to chat with you about it But anyway, I'm gonna wrap this episode up and I appreciate you guys for listening as always if you're watching on YouTube, please Like this video comment below share your feedback Share it with somebody if you if it's helped you

Branden Sewell (01:00:37.486)
share it with someone so it can help them as well. And if you are listening to this podcast on any major podcast platform, please rate and review the podcast. That'll help us to rank better and reach more people so that we can help more home service business owners just like you. lastly, if you need any resources for your business,

Maybe you're in need of a CRM for your business or reputation management, marketing analytics, a way to do integrations between the different softwares that you use for your business. I have different resources in the show notes below. So you can check those out. I do have affiliate links. So I do get credit.

If you decide to sign up, you will get a special offer. And for each one of those different partnerships, the offer is different. But if you use my link, you'll get a special offer. And then when you sign up to use that software, I do get credit for it. So I do appreciate if you decide that you're going to use any of those resources to please use my affiliate link, because that's how I get credit. If you don't use that link.

I don't get credit. So thank you so much for listening. Thank you for supporting the Off-Ladder Podcast. And I'll see you next time on the next episode.