WiIth Sadie - Claire

Anxiety doesn't have to be an identity – it's a response to specific fears. In this refreshingly honest conversation, we explore the powerful shift that happens when you transform vague anxiety into concrete fears you can address.

"I'm just so anxious" is a phrase many of us use, but what if we reframed it? Jeremy shares his transformative approach with clients: "I'm [name] and I'm scared of..." This simple change helps identify what's actually triggering our anxiety, making it something we can process rather than an overwhelming emotional state we're stuck in.

The discussion takes a fascinating turn when we explore why knowledge alone rarely changes how we feel. "Facts don't change feelings; art, beauty and experience change feelings." This explains why we might intellectually understand something is bad for us but continue doing it anyway. It's not information that transforms us – it's meaningful experiences and connections.

Generation Z faces unique challenges with what psychologists call "free-floating anxiety" – a constant background stress that lacks specific triggers. In our hyper-connected world, we're bombarded with information that our brains haven't evolved to process, creating an ambient anxiety that's difficult to address precisely because it's so vague.

Through personal stories, humor, and thoughtful reflection, we explore how being specific about our fears helps us recognize they're often manageable. When we name what scares us, we can begin to see pathways through it rather than being paralyzed by generalized anxiety.

What are you specifically afraid of today? Naming it might be your first step toward facing it.

Transcript

Welcome to Thursday's Gospel

Speaker 1 0:13

okay, everybody, welcome to the gospel. According to jeremy, um, we are uh, I think we're officially thursdays now um is this yeah no it feels right we've, uh, we moved to thursdays.

Speaker 3 0:24

Yeah, I like it.

Speaker 2 0:26

Please do not write art deke wrote on it last family entitlement going on right now I do I usually don't know.

Speaker 1 0:36

You've never been here you, I usually don't let mama I usually don't my mama draw on it, because she can't playing with it. She can't pay attention if she's drawing it I can.

Speaker 2 0:45

Oh, yes, I'm better she's got the bandwidth.

Speaker 1 0:48

I am here again with my co-host producer, big Bird, drew Powell.

Speaker 2 0:53

Beep, beep.

Speaker 1 0:54

My bride of it'll be 30 years, jennifer Lois Deibler, the original J-Lo, and Hope Sadie Claire Deibler is here this week and Hope Sadie Claire Dibler is here this week I'm going to burp.

Speaker 2 1:04

Oh my gosh.

Speaker 1 1:05

Buckle up if she's going to burp.

Speaker 2 1:06

Don't do it. Oh no, do I need to turn her mic down? It's like an earthquake, I don't know, it's okay, guys Is Hope Sadie.

Speaker 1 1:16

Claire.

Speaker 3 1:16

Yes, but the hope is silent oh.

Speaker 1 1:18

Her first name is Hope. Her middle name is Sadie Claire, with a hyphen which her friends refused to believe she had. One friend tell her you can't have a hyphen in your name.

Speaker 2 1:29

She was like no, that's not true. And I was like you want to see my birth certificate or something. It's there, I promise.

Speaker 3 1:34

I call people Claire, all the time now, in your honor, especially if their name's Sadie forget it. I'm calling them.

Speaker 2 1:40

Sadie Claire. It's definitely Sadie Claire, yeah.

Speaker 3 1:42

Like, one of Emery's best friends is Sadie, and now in my mind, it's always Sadie Claire.

Speaker 2 1:47

Yeah, I love it.

Speaker 1 1:48

She is a Sadie. Her name was very it was very close to being Eliza Claire and on the way to the hospital, on the way to the hospital, jennifer said I just do picture a little redheaded Sadie.

Speaker 2 2:00

I said if she comes out with red curls she's got to be a Sadie Claire. When I delivered her.

Speaker 1 2:07

I was like babe, I can even see this red.

Speaker 2 2:11

She's a Sadie.

Speaker 1 2:11

Yeah.

Speaker 3 2:13

It fits.

Speaker 2 2:14

She's curled up into a little fetal position right now. Yeah, can you die, just like birth.

Speaker 1 2:19

Actually that's not how you came out, she came out.

Speaker 2 2:22

I don't even know if she cried, she was like. She didn't, she was like what are we doing?

Speaker 1 2:26

what are we doing world?

Speaker 2 2:27

this is boring. She was already bored, she's already I mean she literally would lay there and stare. I mean I thought, I thought maybe she was blind.

Speaker 1 2:34

I've never seen a baby I thought she was stare at you like, I hate this what are we doing? If she would stare at you, wouldn't that mean she was deaf?

Speaker 2 2:43

I just was like, can she see? Because she's just staring me down.

Speaker 3 2:47

It was awkward, huh.

Speaker 2 2:48

Yeah, it was so intense that I thought maybe she just couldn't see.

Speaker 3 2:52

Are you in the middle of any performances? Right now, any theater productions Soon Well, you are.

Speaker 2 2:58

I just got cast in six.

Speaker 3 3:00

Okay, congratulations.

Speaker 2 3:02

Thanks, she is Anne Boleyn. I'm playing Anne Boleyn. Okay, put this down why.

Speaker 1 3:08

This one's going to be hard for me to come to, because it's about the wives of King.

Speaker 2 3:15

Henry VIII, henry and it's a little sexy. It's not. We're doing the teen version, so it's not as bad, but the real version is raunch.

Speaker 1 3:22

It is. It is a little dodgy yeah.

Speaker 2 3:24

But we're doing the teen version, so it's not that bad.

Speaker 1 3:25

All right, so we're going to do shout outs and call outs. Sadie, I know this is the first time you've ever listened to this podcast. The shout outs are the things that have happened recently that are good, like if you want to shout somebody out you can Call outs are for somebody that you're you're calling out like no bet. So last week's mine were your dog's hitting the camera. Yeah, can you check that you make sure it's okay? It looks crooked because when he's banging into it I know a big hole in my shirt yeah look, she's moving the whole stand when he stopped.

Speaker 2 4:00

Oh, she's trying to get her bone. It's underneath winning I just want my toy guys all right, hang on, please, please hold so, anyway, shadows and call outs.

Speaker 1 4:11

Um so, like like last week, my shout out was the mechanic that just fixed such, then my call out was the parking attendant and frankly so you know, I mean just kind of stuff. That's annoying stuff. Do you remember yours drew?

Speaker 3 4:27

yeah, yeah, I just changed mine. Okay, go ahead, you go first. Um, my call out is no, my shout out is going to be, so it's a dual shout out, and I'm not going to mention their name.

Speaker 3 4:40

Okay, but my both of my daughters are fundraising for mission trips right now. Okay, and they both, crazily enough, this week came up against deadlines where they needed a very exact amount to go on the trip. Like, as in, one of my daughters leaves on Friday and still had to raise a certain amount, and it was a big amount.

Speaker 2 5:02

Okay, friday, that needed Friday, like she literally called me this morning and was like big amount Friday, that needed Friday. Like she literally called me this morning, I was like tomorrow, friday.

Speaker 3 5:08

Yeah Like, yeah, yeah, and was like I need this money. It was a lot of money. I was like haven't you been fundraising? She's like not really. Apparently, not Apparently not, and she's like both situations. Both my girls. I've had close friends of mine that I didn't even know that they sent like fundraiser support to both of them, sent money for the exact amount they needed oh my gosh it's crazy.

Speaker 3 5:36

They didn't know that that was the amount they needed and I didn't know that they my daughters had even asked these friends of mine so after this I'll call them and be like hey, Can I be friends with these people? One of them, maybe the other one? No, I don't trust you with them. You're being cagey with that person.

Speaker 2 5:51

How come you don't trust me with them?

Speaker 3 5:54

Yeah, I just don't think they politically who cares?

Speaker 2 5:59

I can hang with other people.

Speaker 3 6:00

No, I'm just joking, you would love both these people.

Speaker 2 6:02

I can hang with Libs. I can hang with Libs. False I can hang with Libs.

Speaker 1 6:10

I hang with you. He's independent.

Speaker 2 6:12

I hang with Drew.

Speaker 1 6:13

I'm an independent voter.

Speaker 2 6:14

He goes to his liberal church yeah.

Speaker 3 6:17

I had to come out to my church. As what Straight Republican oh man.

Speaker 2 6:21

How'd that go? Ooh, are you a?

Speaker 3 6:22

Republican, they still accept me.

Speaker 1 6:25

How cool is it when your kid I was here when your daughter phoned you to say how cool is it? Yeah, she was very, very emotional about it.

Shout Outs and Call Outs

Speaker 2 6:30

That's amazing.

Speaker 3 6:32

I love it she had to walk out of class and get herself composed.

Speaker 2 6:34

Good for her, and she's going to London.

Speaker 3 6:35

She's going to London, which is the other thing, because it sounds like we're just paying for your vacation.

Speaker 2 6:41

That is true. What is she doing?

Speaker 3 6:43

I don't know I'm very loosely involved in my kids' lives at this point. Once they turn 18, I'm kind of like you know what.

Speaker 2 6:49

I'm done, I've done my we're almost done with this one. She's got like a half year left.

Speaker 1 6:54

And they're done with you also.

Speaker 3 6:59

Like it's when the kids I don for them to be done with it, but it is Like the phone call that came in this morning of like hey, I owe a bunch of money and I'm going to need you to pay it.

Speaker 2 7:08

I don't want to be done. I don't want her to go.

Speaker 3 7:12

I love this season of life with my kids right now. Jamie loves having. She loves them too, but she wants babies always.

Speaker 2 7:19

She loves the baby phase.

Speaker 3 7:26

I'm like I love having kids in college, kids in middle school. I'll have one in high school next year.

Speaker 2 7:28

I'm just like I'm loving it.

Speaker 3 7:29

It's so fun and bentley's 11 and. But she's still my baby, like she. I don't know I'm just really still young she is, but she's like, she's huge, she's like five, seven and I know, but I just mean, like she's almost 18 and that's our baby always.

Speaker 2 7:46

I think it will always be yeah who am I gonna watch gilmore girls with?

Speaker 3 7:52

but like grace and jamie still should. I mean grace's junior in college and her and jamie are as close now as if they've ever been. When they she comes home, it's harry potter, it's hot tea and harry it's hot tea and hair puzzles it's, walks it's you know, they just are best buddies.

Speaker 2 8:09

It's awesome she won't do much with me except for watch tv. I'm with you all the time, no, I agree, but also you get home from work and you're like all I want to do is sit and watch tv.

Speaker 3 8:20

So well, there it is watch tv.

Speaker 2 8:23

I'm not saying it's your fault. I know that we both like watching TV. But you act like you're wanting to go on hikes and big adventures.

Speaker 3 8:29

I ask you all the time, do you want?

Speaker 2 8:31

to walk with me. No, I'm sorry, I don't want to walk to Starbucks and back. I'm sorry, that does not sound very fun to me.

Speaker 3 8:38

I caught you walking in the wild a few times. It's a very passionate, aggressive walk.

Speaker 2 8:44

It's usually like get this over with. Yeah, you don't even like it, but I just ask you to do a loop with me in the neighborhood.

Speaker 3 8:50

Nah, or go run errands with me. Sadie Claire, who are you closer with, your mom or your dad, do you think?

Speaker 2 8:54

Yeah, who's your favorite? I don't know different subjects.

Speaker 1 9:03

They're a lot alike. I mean they have a lot of the same tastes.

Speaker 2 9:05

You are a lot alike too. They keep the same schedule.

Speaker 1 9:10

They like to stay up late, if you get in trouble.

Speaker 3 9:14

Who are you calling first?

Speaker 2 9:15

What do you mean? Get in trouble you do something wrong.

Speaker 3 9:18

Let's start with that.

Speaker 2 9:19

She never does anything wrong. I'm just perfect. You're not a do-something-wrong person.

Speaker 3 9:30

Maybe it's just you get.

Speaker 2 9:30

Yeah, your car breaks down. Who you calling?

Speaker 3 9:31

I probably call him but that seems like a guy kind of test. Okay, that's kind of who we are.

Speaker 2 9:34

I'm not offended she loves that. Well, I got pulled over the other day and I called you for my insurance card. But yeah, that was because I knew you were home.

Speaker 1 9:44

Hey, that can be your shout out. That guy was nice.

Speaker 2 9:46

That was yeah, he was nice. He was nice. She got pulled over because we forgot to put the sticker on the car. Oh, also, is it on. I don't Okay, did you do it? I? Put it on that day he gave me a warning, but we didn't put the sticker on. And it had been December. We forgot to do it.

Speaker 1 10:07

Oopsie and by we. It was your job, yeah.

Speaker 2 10:11

Well, I had put it on the counter so I wouldn't forget. And somebody can't handle things on the counter, so he just puts it in a pile in a drawer and so I'm like it's gone. So, I figured it got done and it didn't. Somebody, somebody doesn't like things on the counter.

Speaker 1 10:30

How would he sound if he didn't want something on the counter?

Speaker 2 10:32

I don't want it on the counter. That's what he would sound like. Gosh, put it away. That's what he would sound like. That's how he'd do. Shout out, call out, honey. I can't remember what they were. I'm going to call out myself.

Speaker 1 10:49

Four.

Speaker 2 10:49

I'm so addicted to my phone. You are and it's a problem and like to think about trying to do better. Gives me panic.

Speaker 3 10:58

You should have gave it up for Lent.

Speaker 2 10:59

I'm thinking about like a delayed Lent. Can you do that?

Speaker 1 11:04

You can.

Speaker 2 11:06

You're like, please do.

Speaker 1 11:07

Well, it's like if anyone's going to delay Lent you're not allowed to change the Christian calendar.

Speaker 2 11:14

No, I know, but can I like tap in late yeah.

Speaker 3 11:17

Whenever you want.

Speaker 2 11:19

Can I be like Jesus? I'm sorry I'm late to this.

Speaker 3 11:21

But he's like, I know I created you.

Speaker 2 11:31

I knew this was gonna happen. I saw this coming all the way. I knit you together a bit late. We knew it was coming. So I mean, the hard thing is I need to get off of instagram, but my kids post things I'd like to see, like hutch post pictures that are and you're see a bunch of us that really rely on you and I.

Speaker 2 11:46

I really get my news from a certain amount of people. So I was thinking I don't know what to do because if I get on, it's still I'm gonna be scrolling um a time limit. So no you, just because I give myself, I don't listen to it, but that's what I'm saying. I know, but I'm trying to be better about it. I gave myself 30 minutes on instagram so I can go check and see if there's anything I missed and then just get off because I know, give someone else the password so you can't hack it see, mine is your password for some reason.

Speaker 2 12:14

I figured it out because I was like you set this for yourself. Somehow. It's your phone, why? Is yours I don't know, I can't change it, but it's like oh wrong, oh wrong password and I was like, hey, so this is not her phone, yeah.

Speaker 1 12:26

I hate it when these okay, you know what, I got a call out. I didn't know what my call out was going to be, but I do not like it when the computer just goes, or whoever it is goes. Old passcode not good enough. Yes, Because we've had the same. Oh yeah, it's frustrating. Our Mama is Old. It's nothing anymore. Yeah, Our passcode used to be. Mama is Old, at 49.

Speaker 2 12:50

Which that's a long time ago.

Speaker 1 12:51

Right and that was good for. And now they're like nope, can't use it, used it too long.

Speaker 3 12:56

I finally started using the password app thing where it logs it for you and does a two-factor.

Speaker 2 13:08

You mean like the yeah, thing where it like logs it for you and does a two factor, like. So you mean, but it's all those weird digits. Yeah, I know, you just let it do it. Yeah, because you just don't ever have to remember it, I know, but the problem is sometimes when I go to do that it it doesn't remember.

Speaker 1 13:14

Like, how do you remember it on multiple devices?

Speaker 2 13:17

yes, that's the other thing. It's not on all. The keychain isn't always on all your devices yeah it's just on, just on my, that's a keychain. How about I knew that?

Speaker 1 13:25

You're so technology.

Speaker 2 13:27

I am so technology.

Speaker 1 13:28

You're all the technology.

Speaker 2 13:30

I'm so technology.

Speaker 3 13:33

Yeah, that's frustrating.

Speaker 1 13:34

I'm sorry. Okay, so who's your call out this week?

Speaker 2 13:38

Let me think about it. I can't remember. So do you get one it was yourself for being on your phone.

Speaker 1 13:42

Oh, you said it was yourself for being on your phone.

Speaker 2 13:43

Oh yeah, oh, that was my call out I can't remember my shout. I have a shout out, you do, yeah, I just can't remember it right now Any other work friends? No, why don't you shout out?

Speaker 3 13:50

Jeremy, get your one affirmation out of the way this month. I should. No, she doesn't want to use it for that. You use one affirmation, a month.

Speaker 1 14:00

When was the last time you heard her compliment me? Ever?

Speaker 2 14:02

I don't know. Probably, yes, I have, I just don't remember exactly when. Thank you, you're welcome.

Speaker 3 14:08

Is it a common occurrence, like your mother's telling your dad how great he is? I don't listen that much.

Speaker 2 14:13

I mean, we were talking the other day about when we met and how I hadn't dated anybody for a couple of years before I met you. And I met him and was like this person is unlike any person I've ever met. Well, is that a compliment In such a big way?

Speaker 1 14:27

Okay.

Speaker 2 14:28

That is a big compliment for me. I was like this guy is so Unique, Unique.

Speaker 1 14:33

Yeah, unique and.

Speaker 2 14:35

You're memorable at least no, but like good, and I was like he's so mature in so many different ways than I've ever met. Anyway, you have been such a good husband.

Speaker 1 14:46

There it is. Oh man, thanks, she dug deep for that one.

Speaker 2 14:49

I am so happy to be married to you for 30 years.

Speaker 1 14:52

No, when I met you.

Speaker 2 14:54

You were 19.

Speaker 1 14:55

Our friend Ronnie is such a good dresser and one time we were meeting together and I was complimenting him and I was like man. I know that Jennifer would like if I would take some cues from you.

Speaker 2 15:10

And he goes, jeremy you always look comfortable. That is true, you dress very comfortable.

Speaker 1 15:17

That is your look and I was like, well, comfort chic.

Speaker 2 15:20

Well, that is. Your main thing is comfort. That's all you care about. You introduced me to ug life, yeah no, you had him first well, he had the oh, you're right, the vibe for he was he went first and being like wearing them out in public yeah, and then he got some for christmas yeah, sadie, what's your call right now?

Speaker 1 15:40

you have a call out like something you're frustrated with or a person it can actually be a person out like something you're frustrated with or a person. It can actually be a person.

Speaker 2 15:46

I have one For you.

Speaker 3 15:49

Say it, say it no. Is it a boy? Yes, oh, we hate this kid.

Speaker 2 15:56

We hate this kid.

Speaker 3 15:57

We don't hate him, guys. We can't see that, oh, that's so bad, I do, I hate him. You can hate him, I do.

Speaker 2 16:02

You can hate him.

Speaker 3 16:03

I absolutely don't. Who knows?

Speaker 1 16:03

who's going to watch this? I absolutely do not hate him. Do you have a call out, babe?

Speaker 3 16:11

Why are you thinking? Do you know you still have a $50 bill waiting for you in one of these episodes?

Speaker 2 16:16

Oh yeah, I thought it was $100. No, it's $50. She's like. I definitely am not doing it. My call out is Apple Maps, because I was really late to my audition the other day and it made me mad.

Speaker 3 16:26

That's true, can you stop Can?

Speaker 2 16:27

you pay attention.

Speaker 1 16:28

I'm paying attention. Do you have a shout out?

Speaker 2 16:30

She shouted out the cop.

Speaker 1 16:32

Oh the cop. Yeah, yeah, I like it. You know, sadie, it's funny because we've moved this podcast to Thursdays. She has her days. Have a color for her, oh yeah, and Thursday for me is, it's like a way happier color than Tuesdays For you it's.

Speaker 2 16:55

Thursday is purple, thursday is brown for me. It's like that like cozy vibe. Thursday yes, what color is Thursday for you? Do you have a color? Mm-mm? Thursday yes, what color is Thursday for you? Do you have a color? Thursday is brown. I like a Thursday. I love Thursday Monday's white.

Speaker 1 17:13

Tuesday is brown. It's my least favorite day.

Speaker 2 17:16

No brown's not bad. It's just the vibe of things, thursday is like what's Monday.

Speaker 1 17:22

I don't know. See, Thursday is like what's Monday.

Speaker 2 17:24

I don't know, but like, see like. Friday is like yellow.

Speaker 1 17:29

Or like a bright color, I think.

Speaker 2 17:30

Saturday is yellow for sunshine. No, saturday is like blue. No Saturday is yellow Like sky. Blue is Saturday Interesting.

Speaker 3 17:38

I like that. I think that's Sunday for me.

Speaker 2 17:40

Yeah, me too, yeah but that could also be Sunday.

Speaker 3 17:42

I don't know. Monday is like red fire engine red.

Speaker 2 17:45

I see Monday as white.

Speaker 3 17:47

Kind of like a devoid of all colors.

Speaker 1 17:48

I feel like Tuesday is green or all the colors.

Speaker 2 17:50

What is the one Tuesday? I could see Tuesday as green I like that for that Wednesday is like I like that. For me, wednesday is like the color of that new from Jeremy Memoir Red Spelled wrong Memior Memior. Memior. It's spelled wrong.

Speaker 1 18:06

So my week well, this is not my week starts on Monday. A calendar that has the week starting on Sunday for me just throws me off. So my week starts on Monday. It is white, tuesday's brown, wednesday's maybe brown green, and then Thursday it starts to brighten up. Friday and Saturday are blue and sunday is red. I don't know if it's blood of jesus or what I.

Speaker 2 18:30

I don't love a sunday here's the problem because monday is next, we can't go off of your color thing because he's colorblind. So any red and green, this assignment, you're thinking what you personally do that day. Yeah, I'm saying just in general the vibe of that day.

Speaker 1 18:48

How do I separate that from me Just?

Speaker 2 18:50

do it.

Speaker 3 18:51

I don't know, just do it it feels like she can brand the day for everyone.

Speaker 2 18:55

No, okay, but I've seen multiple videos of people saying that Thursday and the number 49 and I see 63. That works too. Like yeah, that's right, but like things like that all make sense to them. Or like November like the month, yeah, like all those things go together. Thursday and I think it's because Thanksgiving is always on Thursday. People definitely think that.

Speaker 3 19:17

Thursday and November make sense to me. Yeah, right, also because December feels like a Friday almost.

Speaker 2 19:22

I don't know what December feels like to me. I can't tell what that is, what's?

Speaker 1 19:25

March, feel like.

Speaker 3 19:27

Monday or Tuesday probably. I see it as like a Tuesday.

Speaker 2 19:29

No, I think it's a Friday. No, it's a Tuesday.

Speaker 3 19:32

Do you see the days of the week like this, in the months of the year like this, or like this?

Speaker 2 19:36

Like in my mind.

Speaker 3 19:37

Yeah, is it vertical or horizontal? The days of the week are like this for me she's just going to A circle, I feel like it is.

Speaker 2 19:44

This is Sunday, monday, tuesday, wednesday.

Speaker 1 19:47

Man, there's a right brain thinker right there. Wow, that's something I'm going to use that. I've never thought of it that way. That's actually how it is, I've never thought about it.

Speaker 2 19:56

That's when I think of the week. That's how I think of it.

Speaker 1 20:06

Mine's in a horizontal line. Yeah, you're a linear thinker is he like you he he's a launcher, he likes to start stuff, and yeah, I mean enneagram sevens. Avoid pain by looking forward oh right, right right that's how my the months of the year are also on a forward looking timeline wow you know I've been doing these artists care, like sessions with people and some groups and they like, if I, if I try to explain linear thinking to them, that they're like nah, that's, it's all spiral like that it's all like.

Speaker 2 20:32

No, no, it's all. It's not a spiral, it all like connects, though it's not like it's orbital, though it goes around I don't know how I think of I think I just see a calendar yeah, I mean I see a month in a block like a square. Yeah, so does that mean, you're a left brain thinker?

Speaker 1 20:49

No, I don't think so. I've just got so used to like month at a glance. My life changed when I got sick. I said I'm not doing month at a glance anymore and I went to week and my life changed Like it was. Like that's weird, because then the rest of the month was like purposely hidden from me and so now I'm like okay, week, week at a time yeah, I'm a little bit that way in my business.

Speaker 3 21:12

I'm a, I'm quarterly, but then weekly. That's the I can, that's my yeah q1, q3, that's how you look at the quarter but then go weekly to get to those goals and stuff.

Speaker 1 21:26

I hate when people abbreviate. I'll get back to you by EOD and I'm like what?

Speaker 2 21:31

is EOD. What does that mean?

Speaker 1 21:33

I think it means end of day. Yeah, end of day.

Speaker 2 21:36

Oh, I don't like this text language. It's a whole new language. I'm like just say end of day, it's not hard, just type it.

Speaker 1 21:43

There's no way she does text language, I'm sure.

Speaker 2 21:46

I'm sure she does. You probably say K instead of okay. No, I don't. All the time he says that, all the time I don't say that that's the worst.

Speaker 1 21:52

It's efficient, how it's one less O.

Speaker 2 21:58

In real life. I read K as I'm like mad at you.

Speaker 1 22:02

We don't use pissed in this house, but I'm sorry Way to go Bring it in into the bony ass room.

Speaker 2 22:07

You're a really bad influence. Bring it pissed into the bony ass room she will use that lingo in life.

Speaker 1 22:10

She'll be like I'll be down in a minute BTW.

Speaker 2 22:12

No, I have never said that, yes, you do. She has never said that Out loud no. Btw, I've never gone. Btw IDK you do do it rarely I don't. When have I said BTW, I haven't heard you say see, cap.

Speaker 1 22:31

You do it, I have that took so much energy it did.

Speaker 2 22:37

He tried so hard, he said that, so forced we definitely have meat that beef. He loves to do that one too I didn't cap.

Understanding Anxiety vs. Fear

Speaker 1 22:45

He just says cap slay, whatever. No, don't do an asmr um. Our topic this week y'all is anxiety because I have this I've got two or three uh, two or three clients. This that is. It's very, it's a new phrase I've learned, front of mind for them.

Speaker 2 23:08

Okay, what is that?

Speaker 1 23:09

The front of mind. Top of mind. Top of mind. Top of mind Top plate.

Speaker 2 23:13

Jean-Pierre, what's her face? She started doing that. Now everybody's doing that.

Speaker 1 23:17

I've got a couple of clients in the past two weeks that have been gone. I'm just so anxious they're using my anxiety, my anxiety, so anxious my.

Speaker 1 23:24

They're using my anxiety and and I've had to slow down and go what are you scared of? And although, and they, they'll go, well, I'm just anxious and I'll go, I know but, and so they, they say their name and they go. I say, okay, you know what's your name, suzy, and they'll go. I'll say, repeat this phrase, I'm suzy and I'm scared of, or I'm scared to, and I thought it'd be you know cause it's top of mind for me.

Speaker 1 23:51

It thought it'd be something that you know, because when we're anxious, we're scared of something, and then they will. After time they'll go okay. You know, I'm Susie and I'm scared of failing at this and I'll go okay. Thank you for sharing. What does it mean if you? What will happen if you fail at?

Speaker 3 24:11

you know what I mean.

Speaker 1 24:12

And I thought it may be helpful for our listeners, because anxiety is a I mean, it's just in the, it's in the conversation all the time. You know I'm anxious, I'm taking meds for my anxiety and I go. Well, okay, is it your?

Speaker 2 24:26

anxiety. I hate that people make it my anxiety.

Speaker 1 24:29

Well, Hutch does that.

Speaker 2 24:30

I know I'm like. Stop putting that on yourself. It's bad.

Speaker 1 24:34

Yeah.

Speaker 2 24:34

Don't say that.

Speaker 1 24:35

What would you say if someone says I'm dealing, you know, that's my depression?

Speaker 2 24:39

Just say depression.

Speaker 1 24:41

Yeah, don't you say I'm depressed.

Speaker 2 24:43

I feel like that's. Yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 3 24:46

I just sent my because one of my daughters says that quite a bit my anxiety and I just sent her an Instagram reel of a therapist talking about that very thing.

Speaker 2 24:56

Really yeah.

Speaker 3 24:58

Because I would tell her because they recommend against it.

Speaker 1 25:02

Don't say it Really Okay.

Speaker 2 25:03

So this is a thing, yeah Okay, for sure. Against it don't say really okay. So this is a thing yeah, okay, and a lot of it's just like around identity and you know.

Speaker 3 25:08

But also is, what you were just saying was like, hey, that's, it's better to say I have anxiety about this, or or I'm scared or I'm scared, right, I fear around whatever, but not just saying it's my anxiety, like it's the thing. It's not. It's symptomatic of yeah, a fear or whatever.

Speaker 2 25:26

So I sent it to her and she was like, yeah, I sent my anxiety, didn't appreciate that she never even looks at it it's probably good, though, based on what she's whatever, but she sends me stuff all the time. And did you look at the thing I sent you? Did you look?

Speaker 1 25:40

at it because it's funny, oh my gosh yeah, put your legs down yeah, I'm realizing that j's. This is an aside, but her public persona, well, you don't know. Jennifer, away from this, not really.

Speaker 2 25:52

He doesn't want to.

Speaker 3 25:53

I like the public persona. Aw thanks, I'm afraid I'll be disappointed.

Speaker 2 25:57

Aw, you will, Will, we both said it.

Speaker 3 26:03

Kidding, I'll just like this week, like you were going hard on something, and then you'll just take the most 180 right turn with a meme of some sort.

Speaker 2 26:14

It'll be just like a cute kitten doing something.

Speaker 3 26:17

Yeah, I'll be like boom, boom, boom, aggressive, aggressive aggressive joe biden.

Speaker 2 26:23

This dog fell. Yeah, you gotta bring it up with some light.

Speaker 3 26:25

It's such like whiplash. You got to mix those in.

Speaker 2 26:27

It makes you feel it'll give you some hope.

Speaker 1 26:31

Does it not bother you, though, that if people look at your Instagram feed, they're not getting like? I've actually had to tell people she's not really like that. She is she's way softer in life.

Speaker 2 26:46

She's multidimensional. Those are things you like to talk about Politics, and then memes. So I think it's a pretty good representation.

Speaker 3 26:52

You talk about memes in real life I do love a good meme oh my gosh.

Speaker 2 26:55

Yes, so I think it's a pretty good. This is what I tell you. I'm addicted to my phone. I'm not saying that the things you post are like.

Speaker 1 27:02

Do you think you're addicted to your phone?

Speaker 2 27:03

Yes, but I'm trying, are you?

Speaker 3 27:06

Should we?

Speaker 2 27:06

try together.

Speaker 3 27:07

At least I'm already trying, so. I need to start trying, so you can join if you want.

Speaker 2 27:11

But I'm really bad at it.

Speaker 3 27:12

I was good for a while.

Speaker 1 27:13

You need to change your password. What's your screen time? You don't even want to look. I have. Oh, I thought you meant my limits.

Speaker 2 27:23

good at it. I don't know.

Speaker 1 27:24

I'm so proud of you for even thinking about it sadie and I were out with a couple of her friends one day at chick-fil-a and we were all talking about our screen time and one of her friends goes oh man, I was on 26 hours a day this week and we were like, wow, I don't, that's a little high, I don't 26 hours a day.

Speaker 1 27:43

That's classic anyways, I do think this boiling things down to like I'm jeremy and I'm scared, we're gonna run out of money, like and then somebody would say to me well, what happens if you do like, well, I can't pay my bills, okay, what happens? What happens? If well, you got to call your mom, okay.

Speaker 2 28:05

You know what I mean, like call your mom.

Speaker 1 28:07

Like, but it, it. It does help to like. Non-specific anxiety will not get better.

Speaker 2 28:15

This is what. So I used to have a lot more quiet in my life, and I would do this before long, my whole life. I'd be like, okay, let's boil it down to the very bottom.

Speaker 1 28:25

You did this when we were married. Yeah, I remember you would journal.

Speaker 2 28:30

What is the very, very bottom of what's going on here. But it takes me a long time, but I would spend a lot of time in quiet and I would do that. I would go okay, okay, then what, then what, then what. And you get to the base of it to figure out okay, well, okay, it's going to be fine.

Speaker 1 28:46

Yeah.

Speaker 2 28:47

My biggest fear was always I was going to lose somebody close to me.

Speaker 1 28:50

Yeah, and then what?

Speaker 2 28:51

And then what? Yeah Well, okay, you'll be okay. I mean, it's still one of my biggest fears when I was in one of my dark times of depression.

Speaker 1 29:03

I remember telling her one time I we were on a walk and I said God, I just feel like I lost my best friend. And she said, well, if you did, you'd be okay, you'd have to move on. And it helped. I was like, oh right.

Speaker 2 29:16

Well, you, what you had said too was, I feel like the whole, I lost my best friend and the whole world is just going on and I'm like which is what depression feels like which is what happens when you lose somebody. Yeah, the whole world goes on. Yeah, they don't.

Speaker 1 29:30

It doesn't affect them like it does you I don't know, but it it was and you didn't say it like, get over it you were you were loving and I was like, yeah, that. But non-specific anxiety and non-specific gratitude don't lead anywhere. Good, like, well, yeah, of course I'm thankful for my life. And I'll say, but what, what are you thankful for, like, and then somebody might go well, you know, I'm, I'm really thankful for this coffee and I'll go. Okay, start there If you can find something.

Speaker 2 30:04

Start there.

Speaker 1 30:05

Be specific about your gratitude, be specific about your like people will be just like. Well, I want my dreams to come true and I go. What are they? Well, I want to play music for people. How many? I don't know, it doesn't have to be many. Well, give me a number. Some people will say I don't know, I like playing for 25 people and I'll go. Done, that's doable. We can make a plan for that.

Speaker 2 30:28

Yeah. Like even Hutch. He doesn't want to play for a lot of people. No, he just wants to play for a few people who appreciate his art.

Speaker 1 30:38

Yeah.

Speaker 2 30:39

You know I'm like okay, well.

Speaker 1 30:41

That's good. That's why I think like God is good all the time.

Speaker 3 30:46

That's good. That's why.

Speaker 2 30:46

I think like God is good all the time, that's not that helpful?

Speaker 1 30:48

Yeah, I think what's helpful is God has been good to me in this way yeah, we have a friend who's got a lot of back problems and I remember asking him one time how are you doing today? And he said, well, I'm vertical. And I was like, okay, you know for him that's a win. Yeah, Like he's out of bed, he's vertical. Why are you smiling? I'm just saying it's funny. You were pretty anxious. You were pretty anxious last week.

Speaker 2 31:15

Oh my, she was still anxious yesterday.

Speaker 1 31:19

Well, I mean, you wanted this role.

Speaker 2 31:21

Yeah.

Speaker 1 31:22

And she's a pretty good warrior.

Speaker 2 31:23

And I got it.

Speaker 1 31:25

You got the role you wanted.

Speaker 2 31:27

I wanted any of them you just wanted a role.

Speaker 1 31:29

I got one. She's wanted in it. She got it, she was really happy, and then that lasted what? Probably 12 hours, and then she was worried.

Speaker 2 31:37

And she was worried because she forgot to do her markout days and she was worried they were going to just say forget it.

Speaker 1 31:50

We don't want you anymore. And I said to her I said what are you scared?

Speaker 2 31:52

of and she said I'm scared that they think I'm not taking it serious. I was like okay, well, but like I'm scared that I wouldn't be able to do it because of that. But the bottom of all that is but you were also scared that they would.

Speaker 1 32:01

you told me that they would see you as non-serious and then say we're going to pick somebody else, yeah. And then you read us the email that you wrote them, which was peppered with. I'm so very sorry. She was so gracious and I was like bug. They're never going to do that to you.

Speaker 3 32:16

You were so gracious.

Speaker 1 32:17

Yeah, but it wasn't until we got specific that. You know what I mean. I know people who will not get below half a tank in their car. Now, that's not anybody in this room, but I go. What happens? Well, I don't want to run out of gas. What happens if you run out of gas? Well then I gotta call yeah, but you'll be but you'll be okay, like walk it out, like how would you solve this?

Speaker 2 32:40

I can tell you walk it out, you can tell us.

Speaker 3 32:43

Didn't you run, I guess? Like there's a, there's a spot in kentucky that I run like all the time, same spot. You're it out. You can tell us, didn't you write a guess? Like there's a, there's a spot in kentucky that I run a gas all the time, same spot.

Speaker 1 32:49

You're that are you a gaslight guy? Yeah? Yeah, that's right, we talked about this and I'll. Yeah, I hate you, don't even know what it is either what, what?

Speaker 2 32:57

is that it's? She looked at me like I was gonna understand what she was saying. Walk it out. What is that? It's brian regan and I was like out and you're like. I would know what that means.

Speaker 3 33:06

And then you're like I don't know she tried to have an inside joke with you. No, you said it.

Speaker 2 33:10

I'm like, yeah, Sadie, walk it out.

Speaker 3 33:13

Never heard you say that before.

Speaker 2 33:15

It's sound it out.

Speaker 1 33:20

Sorry, I do think it's hard for Generation Z to wake up on the side of the bed. Where it's a good world, it's going to be a good day.

Speaker 2 33:29

Why.

Speaker 3 33:30

Is that your generation? Yeah, are you a Z.

Speaker 1 33:32

Why is it?

Speaker 2 33:33

hard for them.

Speaker 1 33:34

Well, there's a lot of psychologists call it free-floating anxiety. It's easier when you know what to be anxious about. But when there's free-floating anxiety, when the world is just in a state of like with COVID, there wasn't an enemy, at least right away. It was like who do we blame? And that free-floating anxiety, like it's really hard to process that, especially at first, we didn't know what was going on.

Speaker 2 33:59

And can you go outside? Can you touch anything? Do I need to wipe down my groceries, like everybody was just anxious.

Speaker 3 34:10

We're so over-informed, like when we were kids, we didn't know what to be scared of. We didn't. I didn't have the information that we have available to us now. Whether it's true or not, it's just too much I agree yeah totally. It was just like you're. You could not get away from commentary on what you should be doing. Shouldn't be doing like you're, just like what? What? If this was 30 years ago, we would all just been going. We wouldn't have known.

Facts Don't Change Feelings

Speaker 2 34:29

We wouldn't have known unless you watched the news.

Speaker 3 34:32

Oh, there's something going on.

Speaker 2 34:34

I think that's it too. They're always connected. And that's like having your brain on stun all the time. There is no down of okay, let my brain just empty out.

Speaker 3 34:46

It's not like soul level connection, it's like surfacy.

Speaker 2 34:48

Yes.

Speaker 3 34:49

Make you feel connected, but you're actually not.

Speaker 2 34:51

That's anxiety, it's just one way information Like it's like being plugged into energy all the time.

Speaker 3 34:56

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 34:57

And never unplugging and going okay, just letting my brain. I mean, I just picture my brain. Sometimes I just if I've been quiet, usually in the morning, I'll lay there and just let my brain wander, and it's literally the stupidest stuff. But it'll come. It's like a circle and I'm like I just have the same thing coming around, coming around, coming around, and then eventually it just goes away.

Speaker 2 35:20

But I have to let myself think about it over and over and over in order for it to finally go away. Let my brain about it over and over and over in order for it to finally go away. Let my brain process it.

Speaker 1 35:31

We've really destroyed this. Yeah, we're going to need a new paper. I just didn't want to lose much. What?

Speaker 2 35:35

you're saying was really good.

Speaker 1 35:36

I just didn't want to lose my train of thought. I was listening to a woman speak this week. She's trying to create artistic experiences for people and the person who was interviewing her said why, why? Why do you feel like this is important? And she said, well, facts don't change feelings. And I didn't. I was like, well, I don't know about that. And and then she went on to explain. She's like facts, they may help in learning. And there are some facts that there aren't feelings associated with. Like two plus two equals four doesn't have a feeling, it's just a. But facts will not change the way you feel. You can tell someone who's experiencing traumatic stress or feel scared, and you say don't be scared, there's nothing to be scared of. Well, that might be a fact, but it doesn't change how you feel. Art, beauty and experience change feelings. Facts don't.

Speaker 2 36:29

Art changes your feelings.

Speaker 1 36:31

Art experience and beauty change the way you feel, especially experiences with other people. Like facts, just don't do that. In fact, circumstances may not change at all, but if you are with someone it can change the way you feel. Like you can have someone in the house and outside circumstances don't change. You're no safer having you know you're both in danger. But it changes. You're both in danger?

Speaker 3 37:00

You don't think. Finding out something that you thought was true isn't true.

Speaker 1 37:06

It doesn't change the way you feel. It doesn't. Actually, they've done these. They've done these um studies with people who are family members of folks who have been murdered, and so they somebody's murdered. The family comes in. They prosecute the murderer. He goes to jail. Right DNA evidence comes out that exonerates that person, that person. They figure out that person did not do it. There's no chance they could have done it. They find the person that the DNA does match. They put them in jail. The family will still die on that match. They put them in jail. The family will still die on that hill. They will go. I'll never believe that they did it Really.

Speaker 1 37:52

Yes.

Speaker 2 37:52

How many times have they done this?

Speaker 1 37:54

More times than not, the family still chooses to believe that the person who's now on the street is the real killer.

Speaker 3 38:00

I don't think I would. I think I'd be like, oh my bad dude.

Speaker 2 38:04

I think I might be like oh my bad dude, I think I might too.

Speaker 3 38:05

I mean, if there's DNA evidence, it really doesn't make sense, but also it's hard to identify with that deeply.

Speaker 2 38:09

Can I? Send you the we can put the link in the show notes oh, it's never going to happen. Don't even pretend like that's going to happen.

Speaker 1 38:14

No, this might be the time. Put the link in the show notes. It's worth it to you.

Speaker 2 38:21

We might need you to produce this.

Speaker 1 38:23

We need you to produce this podcast.

Speaker 3 38:24

Well, look, okay, guys, I'll use myself as an example.

Speaker 2 38:26

I feel cool.

Speaker 1 38:27

I know for an absolute fact. Karen and Jennifer have sent me article on how bad artificial sweetener is for you, Karen sent you that.

Speaker 2 38:38

Yeah, karen Sloop. Yeah, because Karen used to be addicted to Coke too. Hey, look at you.

Speaker 1 38:43

I absolutely know that it's bad for me.

Speaker 2 38:46

And you don't care.

Speaker 1 38:48

It doesn't change how I feel about Coke.

Speaker 2 38:50

You know what this one would say. Well, that's later Sadie's problem.

Speaker 1 38:54

Well, that's actually. I never heard you say that before, but we need to talk about that.

Speaker 2 38:59

Oh, okay, why.

Speaker 1 39:00

You're in trouble. Because, later Sadie's still you If you're a spiral person, says you, because later Sadie's still you, if you're a spiral person, you need to talk to older Sadie, I know, but you're doing the same thing Exactly. That's later Jeremy's problem.

Speaker 2 39:13

I haven't said that in a while. I don't think.

Speaker 1 39:17

Because I've been getting better at feeling bad about what I eat, that's good.

Speaker 2 39:20

What did you say? Say it again I've been getting better at feeling bad about what, what I eat. I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 39:28

So I want her to be responsible about what she eats has all of this stuff you know about health changed your behavior.

Speaker 2 39:38

On some things, yes.

Speaker 1 39:40

But not like.

Speaker 2 39:42

I mean I feel like I eat pretty healthy most of the time.

Speaker 1 39:48

Okay, I mean our conversations after you've eaten a box of Pop-Tarts. Don't support that, wow.

Speaker 2 39:55

What are our conversations? Shots fired.

Speaker 1 39:56

You're like why am I doing this?

Speaker 2 39:58

I shouldn't be eating this I don't eat a box of Pop-Tarts.

Speaker 1 40:00

Not a box Jeez. Louise A sleeve An Oreo sleeve.

Speaker 2 40:04

You act like I do this all the time.

Speaker 3 40:06

A pair.

Speaker 1 40:07

Every once in a while have a Pop-Tart, a misspoke, a pair of Pop-Tarts, I feel like.

Speaker 2 40:11

I try to keep it pretty balanced.

Speaker 1 40:15

I mean, I do have junk sometimes. A box of Pop-Tarts would be so much Pop-Tarts, no kidding, can you imagine?

Speaker 3 40:20

I meant one of those tinfoils. I'm eating a whole six Pop-Tarts in one. When I do that, I do have a low-kill A pack of Pop-Tarts.

Speaker 2 40:27

I'm just picturing you coming up from blacking out Like Cookie Monster.

Speaker 3 40:31

I'm just destroying a whole box Like Cookie Monster.

Speaker 2 40:36

Yeah, she doesn't know, cookie Monster I do, but his name's Cookie Monster not Cookie.

Speaker 3 40:40

Do you heat up the Pop-Tarts or do you eat them cold?

Speaker 2 40:42

Oh I toast them until they're burnt. I like them brown.

Speaker 1 40:45

Yeah, she eats the edges.

Speaker 2 40:47

I love the edges. Edges are the favorite part for me. You don't eat the edges.

Speaker 1 40:51

I do, but I don't like them. Well, you give yours to Winnie, I give them to Winnie.

Speaker 2 40:55

Winnie loves. When you have them, you know what sounds so good right now is a pop tart. I did, I ate them all, can't keep those things in the house when I'm nauseous. Sometimes, like when I was pregnant, the only thing that sounded good was a Pop-Tart. So sometimes now, if I get nauseous, I'm like, oh, I just need a Pop-Tart. I don't know why.

Speaker 3 41:15

French fries for me? I just want Chick-fil-A fries.

Speaker 2 41:21

Hey guys, commercial break. Come get ice cream for me at Sweet Haven.

Speaker 3 41:25

You work at Sweet Haven, she does which one In West Haven Both but mostly West Haven Both my girls worked at Sweet Haven.

Speaker 2 41:31

Really.

Speaker 3 41:31

For a long time.

Speaker 2 41:32

yeah, that was our high school. Job was Sweet Haven, did they?

Speaker 3 41:34

like it. They loved it. The owners there are great. They're really nice. They're so great I forget their names.

Speaker 2 41:41

Katie and Ariel.

Speaker 3 41:44

Yes, and I will say, since we're giving them a shout out, it was a great high school job because they really cared with my daughters, about helping them know how to show up in a professional setting. It wasn't just like here's your job, it was like they coached my girls up on several things and they were awesome.

Speaker 2 42:02

Yeah, nothing but love for Sweet Haven.

Speaker 3 42:04

But yeah, the Dole Whip is great. It's like the one you get at Disney.

Speaker 2 42:07

It's so good? Yeah, because we did the one at Disney and I was like, oh my gosh, this is the best thing I've ever had.

Speaker 3 42:12

I'll have one next week at this time probably.

Speaker 2 42:14

You show off Yep, come visit. Call out Drew.

Speaker 3 42:18

No alcohol in my this time.

Speaker 1 42:20

I don't I mean shout out to. I think they're great too, but I don't remember you being super coached up. Well that's true.

Speaker 2 42:29

The training process, they just didn't train me for everything, gotcha. Training process wasn't great. So I like I did my two training shifts and then they were like okay, you're opening and you're working by yourself. And I was like, oh, okay. That feels right, though I mean that doesn't feel like they'll throw you in. Yeah, I remember my girls like I'm like you think of myself. They shouldn't be doing this. There were definitely lots of things that I was like I've never been told how to do this.

Speaker 2 42:49

So I just guessed she improvised, but I texted Katie about like a lot of stuff that I didn't know how to do. Yeah, and she's like yeah, if you have any questions, just ask me.

Speaker 1 43:06

Be careful of Sadie, though the whip things. And she put it in. I said I'll have a small, and she didn't, couldn't find the small cup, so she put it in a large and she got to the thing and she said, well, I'll just charge you for a large.

Speaker 2 43:11

And I was like no well, I gave you the amount, though ordered a small. I'm better now, guys. That was my first day working by myself I was like I ordered a small.

Speaker 1 43:20

That was my first shift, that wasn't training.

Speaker 2 43:22

she's like, yeah, but I gave you a large. And he's like, yeah, okay, guys, we're better now.

Speaker 3 43:28

I had to get in touch with them because I accidentally I tried to give my daughter a really nice tip of $10, and I got carried away with a zero and I gave her a $100 tip. Oops, which they pulled among everyone Exactly which they do, and I had to.

Speaker 2 43:41

I was like listen I was like listen, we gotta walk that back, yeah yeah, yeah, so they did, they were that's nice, I think.

Speaker 3 43:46

Katie had been mowing or something. I was like, hey, I didn't mean to give a hundred bucks that is awesome.

Speaker 2 43:51

Good thing you caught that.

Speaker 3 43:53

I caught it immediately. I was like oh shit and it was too late it was gone, I, at that moment in my life, that would have probably just devastated me. Yeah, I devastated me yeah I needed that 100 bucks back so back to my point so enough about you, enough about the pop tarts that

Speaker 1 44:08

sort of, but here's the thing do you see? My point is sometimes knowing stuff does not change how we feel like if we feel hungry and we know I shouldn't eat this work. If we feel, you know, it just doesn't. This drink's not good for me. I think I agree with you. I'm like 80, but if you feel something, it will change.

Gen Z and Free-Floating Anxiety

Speaker 2 44:29

Like that's true, you, you, you might think a certain way about gay people, and then you start to have relationships and you have and you're like you turn gay well, or you don't go all that way, but you have a couple of gay friends and you're like oh, this changes my experience. Now I'm gay. Now I change because I had an experience with a gay person. Now I'm gay.

Speaker 1 44:52

Wow, let's just clip that out.

Speaker 2 44:55

No, we're no, no, let's just have that Gay gay gay, I had an experience with a gay person.

Speaker 1 45:00

Now I'm gay.

Speaker 3 45:01

That's what it bite for this episode.

Speaker 2 45:05

What's it called? What? Well, how about this, when we were?

Speaker 1 45:08

younger we were told never shake your baby. And we were like I would never shake my baby and then your baby's crying and you're like I'm not going to shake my baby, but I know the feeling of it now, that's a new Fregatti.

Speaker 2 45:22

You didn't make that up. No, that's Nate Bregazzi.

Speaker 1 45:24

That is not Nate Bregazzi, yeah.

Speaker 2 45:26

He said I'm pretty sure I'm going to shake this baby.

Speaker 1 45:29

No, he goes no, his baby was crying and I know his bit. His bit is. I'm pretty sure we're not supposed to shake this baby.

Speaker 2 45:37

He's just tired. He's actually gay for Nate Bregazzi.

Speaker 1 45:39

He is totally gay for Nate Bregazzi.

Speaker 2 45:41

And Thayne, and Thayne.

Speaker 1 45:43

Can, can we end this show?

Speaker 2 45:44

There's a man crying.

Speaker 1 45:47

Andrew, you're not coming on again. Fine, fine by me, you've been asking me to do this for so long. Hey, sue me, I have gay friends, I mean.

Speaker 2 45:56

That doesn't mean you have to be gay. I'm not gay. I have gay friends too.

Speaker 1 46:03

I like gay people. That's fun.

Speaker 2 46:05

I love gay people, yeah, but you don't have to be like you're in great shape man. That's such a weird thing to say to a gay guy, or not even in that he didn't. What'd he say he was?

Speaker 3 46:13

I don't remember he wants to be flirted with. Is that so wrong? This guy? He wants to be wooed.

Speaker 1 46:19

That's all exactly we find out this guy's 44 years old and he's doing and I'm like that's true, dang man, you are in good shape. He wasn't 44.

Speaker 2 46:27

He would be so upset that you just said that I mean he's 41. I think he's 42 or something, but 44, he would be so mad at you, it's only two years. You hang on to every year when you're at that age.

Speaker 1 46:37

I guarantee you he's not listening.

Speaker 2 46:40

Well, that's for sure. I hope not.

Speaker 1 46:46

But yeah, so I, I. I what this woman was saying. She had data to back it up that. I think she's right. I think feelings are changed by experience. Beauty facts don't win arguments. I mean you can have absolute data and facts and people don't change their mind.

Speaker 3 47:05

Interesting that's I mean. It's definitely true in the political landscape recently. What?

Speaker 2 47:10

do you? I feel like that's a you're coming at me no, no, I'm just kidding.

Speaker 3 47:14

In general, I'm kidding I mean, yeah, I think both sides of the aisle could be presented with quote-unquote facts, which is hard to get to even know what the facts are. But even with those, they tend to be ignored you can't, yeah.

Speaker 2 47:26

Yeah, both sides are like meh, I don't care. Yeah, well, I mean.

Speaker 1 47:31

Jesus' friends told Thomas we saw him and they said I don't believe you. Unless I see him and actually touch the scars, I do not believe you.

Speaker 2 47:41

Wow.

Speaker 1 47:43

I mean, they were like we were, just he cooked us breakfast. Thomas got a lot of hate.

Speaker 2 47:48

when I was a kid, Thomas was like doubting Thomas.

Speaker 1 47:52

Really, oh my gosh. Yes, oh, he is doubting Thomas, isn't he?

Speaker 2 47:55

Doubting Thomas, yeah. I mean, I would have believed, yeah, but you know we all would have been like Thomas, probably, and been like yeah, right, yeah, that's a tough pill to swallow there. Especially then.

Speaker 1 48:06

You know what I mean? Yeah, we buried this guy.

Speaker 2 48:08

We buried him and like now we'd be like, well, maybe it was a hologram, you know what I mean, like some weird.

Speaker 1 48:14

Yeah.

Speaker 2 48:15

But he would have been like oh no.

Speaker 3 48:17

With my trust issues, I definitely wouldn't have believed what I was told. I'd have been like yeah, I'll believe it when I see it. Yeah.

Speaker 2 48:24

I mean, I'm from Missouri, the show me state.

Speaker 1 48:26

That's right, you got to show me and even if we show you you might not be, yeah unless I have an experience with art or beauty.

Speaker 2 48:34

Mimi's also from Missouri and she believes everything. Mimi.

Speaker 3 48:38

You just need to have a good experience with a Democrat and then change your mind.

Speaker 2 48:41

I have lots of good experiences with Democrats. I have friends that are Democrats, don't I?

Speaker 3 48:46

Who? I'm not sure. I think you have to ask.

Speaker 2 48:49

They're not that great of friends. I absolutely do.

Speaker 1 48:52

Okay, who I'm one. Are you picturing one in your mind? You picturing me.

Speaker 2 48:55

Who might it be? Well, I'm married to one.

Speaker 1 49:01

I'm not a Democrat. Jeez, I'm married to one. I am not a Democrat.

Speaker 2 49:06

Okay, let me think.

Speaker 3 49:12

Yes, I, I am not a democrat. Okay, let me think yes, I do. I have friendships with democrats, okay, yes, I do.

Speaker 2 49:15

When was the last time you talked to the said democrats? Uh, I don't know. I mean, I meet people all the time that are don't believe the same as me. I'm okay with it yeah, you are.

Speaker 1 49:21

That's what I want people to know about you. That's what I don't think comes across in your public life.

Speaker 2 49:27

Yeah. You know, you mean my Instagram or on here?

Speaker 1 49:30

Those, those two things.

Speaker 2 49:32

Oh, okay.

Speaker 3 49:34

Yeah, post something good about a Democrat every once in a while.

Speaker 2 49:39

Nah, I don't think she can do that. I can't do that no. I mean if there was something good to post right now, I would.

Speaker 1 49:46

Hey, I'm not sure we've got Miss Liberal sitting over here either. Uh-oh what? Uh-oh? Not in this house.

Speaker 2 49:54

Am I, I don't know, uh-oh.

Speaker 1 49:56

I try to stay out of these things. Breaking news no, but she sends me stuff.

Speaker 2 49:59

It's pretty great. What do I send you? You've sent me memes and stuff.

Speaker 1 50:03

You also bought her a mug a Donald Trump mug for Christmas?

Speaker 3 50:06

Yeah, I didn't know he did, but that was for her, but that's just her doing things that she knows you would like.

Speaker 2 50:12

Yeah, right, but sometimes who's that guy that goes to college campuses or whatever? Charlie Kirk yeah, his videos make me mad because of the people that he talks to.

Speaker 1 50:23

That was like a 10,000 pyramid. Who's that guy who goes to college? Charlie Kirk.

Speaker 2 50:29

So the people that he talks to who are fighting with him make you mad? Yeah, they're so annoying. She's pretty.

Speaker 1 50:34

Yeah, they're so annoying.

Speaker 2 50:35

She's pretty conservative.

Speaker 1 50:37

The thing is, she's.

Speaker 2 50:38

I got one. I got one out of two. Hutch is pretty lib.

Speaker 1 50:43

I don't think he is, I don't think he'd want to be put in a category.

Speaker 2 50:49

No, he wouldn't, that's true, he doesn't want to be but, like also, all of my friends are definitely not lib at all. She has some friends who put me to shame.

Speaker 1 50:55

So before we sign off on it. Are there any new Gen Z terms that have just come out that we don't know?

Speaker 2 51:02

Yeah, what do you got Like?

Speaker 1 51:03

what are the latest?

Speaker 2 51:16

It's been about a year since we've done a gen z episode like because last year it was no cap, it was skibbity, it was, it was bussing. I haven't heard you say bussing in a long time. I've heard her say bus, actually bus sometimes, which is so out, um, I don't know riz oh gosh I'm trying to think if my kids have dropped any new ones on me recently. I don't think I haven't heard any new ones lately. I mean, people say like eat or like that ate. Oh, that ate.

Speaker 1 51:36

Yeah, I never heard that. Like the number eight.

Speaker 2 51:39

No, like you ate.

Speaker 1 51:41

Or cook.

Speaker 2 51:42

Yeah, cook, that's a good thing. Yeah, it's a good thing Like if you fall, you also bit it or ate.

Speaker 3 51:48

yeah, you ate it, you ate it but no, this one's different, but this is different. So this is like a good, like that ate.

Speaker 2 51:53

This is like you cook, you serve, you eat you. Oh, that's all good stuff. Left no crumbs.

Speaker 3 52:00

Yeah, that's good you left no crumbs that's a good one. I like that. It doesn't always have to be good, though, right, because my son every once in a while will be like oh, I didn't study for this test, I'm so cooked.

Speaker 2 52:10

Yeah. You could also say cooked and like, oh, I'm not going to do good. Yeah, that's true, I forgot about that.

Speaker 1 52:15

I'm cooked is bad.

Speaker 3 52:22

But you cooked is good, or if he's playing basketball and he says, let, he's about to get in the kitchen and chop it up.

Speaker 2 52:26

Okay, I don't know.

Speaker 1 52:28

I just made that part up, so your meme game cooks.

Speaker 2 52:32

No eats.

Speaker 1 52:33

Oh, it eats Slaps. It leaves no crumbs.

Speaker 2 52:37

Slaps, it leaves no crumbs. I remember my call out what these fingernails, so I get you mean shout out, shout out. Yes, I get compliments on these fingernails all the time okay people think I go and get them done and pay like 70. I don't they pay 6.99 for them at target.

Speaker 1 52:57

they are kiss, they eat chef's kiss.

Speaker 2 52:59

They're the kiss they're called no, that's the brand kiss um nails, and they are the natural nail Sponsor her. So yeah, this podcast is like ADHD paradise.

Speaker 3 53:14

It's what ADHD paradise?

Speaker 2 53:15

Oh right, yeah, seriously, I have it so much. I know I do. I think everyone does. I sound so mean on this podcast guys. I promise I'm not mean in real life, she's a sweet sweet girl.

Speaker 3 53:25

I don't think I would approach you in public.

Speaker 2 53:27

Sadie Claire based on Me either, jk.

Speaker 3 53:30

That would be weird.

Speaker 1 53:30

You really wouldn't.

Speaker 2 53:32

Yeah, she's too scary.

Speaker 3 53:34

I have approached Hutch in public before Do you have creepy phobia Like I should have more.

Speaker 2 53:40

More what? Oh, if you saw me in public, then that'd be fine, but if it was another random girl you didn't know. That'd be weird if you approached me.

Speaker 1 53:47

I wouldn't approach one of your girls just because I would not want them to think who? Is this creepy guy and they've made me that way. My kids are so creepy phobic.

Speaker 3 53:59

Yes, I know what you're saying. So my son's current girlfriend, I was not allowed to acknowledge her presence. Current girlfriend. I was not allowed to acknowledge her presence and finally I said, son, this is awkward because you're making me be mean, because, at the risk of looking creepy, well, because she would like you. I could tell she was wanting to like because they would be hanging out together and she was wanting to engage at some level.

Speaker 2 54:22

I said, okay, here's the deal you have to introduce me, oh so you've never, now I have, but I think you have to introduce me, oh so you've never, not now I have.

Speaker 3 54:28

But I think you have to introduce me to this, to this person, or because he, it was like you're the biggest creep if you go up to her and say, hi, I'm aj's dad yeah you know he's like no, you can't do that so creepy, it's so crazy. I was like, okay, well then I was like we're in a lot of these same environments and she's thinking that I'm just shunning her and being you know well, if he came into the coffee shop he knows you now he could be like yeah, well, because I would know who you are.

Speaker 3 54:53

So it like yeah I'm not gonna go up to someone your age. I don't know what are you talking about?

Speaker 2 54:56

I thought you were saying at first oh no, no, like someone I know like if you saw my girls in public, you said hi to them. That wouldn't be weird they don't know us at all, though I mean I mean yeah. Okay, so can I ask you this how did the date go? The movie, oh, from a while ago, I think it went good. You didn't hear.

Speaker 3 55:14

She's. No, I didn't really hear it. He does not like to talk about it, that's for sure. Does not want to talk about it. Oh, that's interesting.

Speaker 2 55:22

Maybe that's a. Did your girls talk about it?

Speaker 3 55:24

They never dated Really, mm-hmm.

Speaker 2 55:27

They just weren't.

Speaker 3 55:28

Not into it, they're just picky. Just weren't yeah.

Speaker 2 55:32

They're such cute girls.

Speaker 3 55:34

Couldn't tell you Maybe.

Speaker 2 55:35

Hutch should date one of them. Well, he.

Speaker 3 55:37

We tried. They wear too much makeup, I guess.

Speaker 1 55:40

No, they never met Common mistake, I guess, With Hutch for sure.

Speaker 2 55:43

Yeah, hutch isn't a makeup guy.

Speaker 1 55:47

I'm sure Hutch hates how it looks. Yeah, I think we peaked.

Speaker 2 55:52

Hutch hates what the amount of makeup that I wear. Oh, I'm sure he does.

Speaker 1 55:56

I don't think he does. The thing Hutch hates most is lipstick and fake eyelashes.

Speaker 2 56:04

He probably thinks she's wearing fake eyelashes, though, because she's got a lot of.

Speaker 3 56:07

They're not fake not fake she wears a lot of mascara they don't look fake though I thought they were fake. I'm not gonna lie. They're so long right, very long so they were fake not in a bad way, I just. I just thought they were fake when you said you're a little really no, they're not, they're just straight they're just he straightens them.

Speaker 1 56:24

He's got a straightener, a tiny little straightener. I think if you curl them, burn my eyelids every day trying's got a straightener.

Speaker 2 56:27

I think if you curled them they would actually be long. I burn my eyelids every day trying to get that straightener to attach to the lids have you seen? This commercial about the fungus in your eyelashes?

Speaker 1 56:37

I don't want to talk about it.

Speaker 2 56:38

I definitely have that, what is it?

Speaker 1 56:40

I feel like they made that up. No.

Speaker 2 56:43

I've seen it. It's definitely a thing, but the commercial is ridiculous. You have a clump. Thank you.

Speaker 1 56:55

I think we need to shut it down.

Speaker 2 56:56

Thank you everybody for listening.

Speaker 1 56:58

If you want to get a hold of Sadie Clare on her Instagram she's at she's private, should I?

Speaker 3 57:03

make it public? No, I feel like I should, but what is it?

Speaker 1 57:05

No, this is going, gonna launch a public career at sadie dibler, at sadie dibler and she'll think about adding you if you try to follow her.

Speaker 2 57:14

What's the point of having a private account if you're only gonna?

Speaker 3 57:16

if you're gonna let everyone. I think I have friends of y'all's that every once in a while will follow me and I don't accept them oh, I don't accept them unless I know them or I know of them really, yeah, because then I.

Speaker 2 57:25

then I'm like, if I'm going to let everyone follow me, then I'll have a public account, right.

Speaker 1 57:29

That is one thing I don't follow. I follow one of her friends, mclaren, because we're family friends. That's it.

Speaker 2 57:35

Yeah, you don't really follow anyone, though I followed a bunch of her friends from theater and then I went in and blocked them all because sometimes post really unflattering things of me, my college girl's friends now. Yeah, that's different.

Speaker 3 57:48

They're like adults, though they come to the house.

Speaker 2 57:50

When you post unflattering things of me, we don't need Micah getting a hold of those that's not a good idea.

Speaker 3 57:56

Shout out to Micah, micah.

Speaker 2 57:58

Call out to Micah. I'm just kidding.

Speaker 3 57:59

Oh, is he the one from earlier. No, no, no and I don't like him.

Speaker 1 58:08

Micah is pretty great though he's funny, no, micah's micah's trying to raise money for his um, oh yeah, go, go donate for micah's guatemala trip, guys I was, uh, um, like a boy's uh dressing room dad for her last performance, and one of the kids is he's, everybody knows it, he's wants to marry sadie, and so he came to me and like wrote me a note because he was saving his voice he's.

Speaker 2 58:32

He's younger than sadie. He wrote me a note like do I have your permission or?

Speaker 3 58:37

your blessing or whatever.

Speaker 1 58:39

And I said, well, it's sadie, you gotta ask. You know I trust her. And then he wrote me back something like what if she says okay? And I said, well, how old are you? And he responded I'm between 14 and 16. He gave me a range and I was like I don't know, jedediah, I'm pretty sure you might be 14 and 16 why?

Speaker 2 59:02

why would you say, because he didn't want to seem younger.

Speaker 1 59:05

He didn't want to seem young but it's sort of brilliant, because now I'm like, well, he's in the range Between 40.

Speaker 2 59:11

How cute is that, oh.

Speaker 1 59:13

I love. It All right, everybody Get some art, beauty experience.

Speaker 3 59:17

And some nails and some 699 nails, see you next Brown Thursday.

Speaker 2 59:22

Brown Thursday Bye.