WEBVTT 00:00:00.160 --> 00:00:01.199 I ain't been doing anything. 00:00:01.280 --> 00:00:02.240 You guys are clapping. 00:00:02.319 --> 00:00:03.120 Thank you so much. 00:00:03.279 --> 00:00:05.200 I love Gateway Church. 00:00:05.280 --> 00:00:06.480 Pastor Robert's awesome. 00:00:06.559 --> 00:00:06.879 Let me tell you. 00:00:07.040 --> 00:00:12.320 So Pastor Robert is like, if you've never been here before, he was a white dude who was just talking. 00:00:12.560 --> 00:00:18.399 Um like, absolutely a personal friend of mine, and he ministers to me even when we're just hanging out. 00:00:18.480 --> 00:00:20.559 It's not like he's trying, it's not like he's opening the Bible. 00:00:20.719 --> 00:00:22.079 It just flows out of him. 00:00:22.239 --> 00:00:26.000 And the same thing shows up like every Sunday when he brings the word too. 00:00:26.079 --> 00:00:29.039 So I'm telling you, this stuff is like next week, he's gonna bring it. 00:00:29.199 --> 00:00:29.760 Like for real. 00:00:29.839 --> 00:00:30.960 So you wanna be here. 00:00:31.039 --> 00:00:33.920 I'm just I'm just I'm gonna sing it, but he's gonna bring it. 00:00:34.240 --> 00:00:37.679 So I'm excited, it's gonna be so much fun. 00:00:37.840 --> 00:00:40.000 Oh, what's up to all the other campuses? 00:00:40.159 --> 00:00:40.560 Yeah. 00:00:40.799 --> 00:00:44.159 I just want to say I can see you, even if you're in overflow. 00:00:44.320 --> 00:00:49.119 Like if you're in that little room to seem weird, there's actually another room where other people are. 00:00:49.280 --> 00:00:50.880 You just got there late. 00:00:53.039 --> 00:00:54.000 But I can see you. 00:00:54.079 --> 00:00:55.439 I want everybody and all the other campuses. 00:00:55.600 --> 00:00:59.280 If you could raise your hand at me and wave, other campuses, people, not you, okay? 00:00:59.359 --> 00:01:00.399 Yeah, do you wave? 00:01:00.479 --> 00:01:01.840 And then try the other hand too. 00:01:01.920 --> 00:01:04.239 Try the yeah, that's so cool. 00:01:04.560 --> 00:01:06.560 The services so far have been awesome. 00:01:06.719 --> 00:01:07.200 So good. 00:01:07.280 --> 00:01:09.200 Last week, Todd White was bringing it. 00:01:09.280 --> 00:01:13.599 And then if you weren't here, Nick V, who's a friend of mine, he was bringing it. 00:01:13.840 --> 00:01:16.400 Um, you know he's faking, right? 00:01:16.640 --> 00:01:18.000 You know he's faking. 00:01:18.400 --> 00:01:19.840 Yeah, yeah, it's a whole. 00:01:24.079 --> 00:01:27.359 Anyway, um, if you weren't here, you missed it. 00:01:27.439 --> 00:01:29.840 You gotta go back and you don't know what that joke means right now. 00:01:30.079 --> 00:01:32.719 But he don't got no arms and no legs. 00:01:32.799 --> 00:01:34.319 And I said he was faking it. 00:01:34.400 --> 00:01:35.920 So that was the joke, really. 00:01:38.239 --> 00:01:41.760 So there's some scripture that I want you to read when you go back to the crib if you got a Bible. 00:01:41.920 --> 00:01:44.000 If you don't, hopefully by the end of the day, maybe you'll have one. 00:01:44.159 --> 00:01:46.400 Anyway, so there is Genesis 22. 00:01:46.640 --> 00:01:47.760 You don't gotta read it right now. 00:01:47.920 --> 00:01:49.280 Trust me, it's there. 00:01:50.719 --> 00:01:54.000 So it's Genesis 22, 1 through 18. 00:01:54.239 --> 00:01:58.959 So when you go home, you should read it because it'll pop different as a result of what we're gonna talk about today. 00:01:59.040 --> 00:02:01.519 So, because I want people to like learn and stuff. 00:02:01.599 --> 00:02:04.159 You don't want to just be I remember my daughter, seven years old. 00:02:04.319 --> 00:02:05.840 Um, oh, let me say this. 00:02:05.920 --> 00:02:08.000 This hit me about the first responders, right? 00:02:08.240 --> 00:02:14.319 Um first responders are the first ones to respond, but here's a cool little catchphrase I thought of last service. 00:02:14.479 --> 00:02:19.680 So if they're the first responders, I think us as Christians, we should be the second responders. 00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:21.280 Let me hear, let me, let me explain. 00:02:21.439 --> 00:02:26.639 So, a second responder, as soon as they hear a siren or hear the news, we start to pray. 00:02:26.879 --> 00:02:29.199 Because there's signs all over that someone needs prayer. 00:02:29.360 --> 00:02:34.400 There's signs like the a siren, or there's signs like a sign that says there's an accident ahead. 00:02:34.639 --> 00:02:40.319 Are you are you just gonna get upset because now you're gonna be late, or are you gonna take that as an indication to respond and pray? 00:02:40.560 --> 00:02:42.159 That was just extra cool. 00:02:42.240 --> 00:02:48.560 I didn't the other service they had to fire department here, which was awkward because I was parked in front of a hydrant. 00:02:48.879 --> 00:02:52.000 So that was weird for me. 00:02:52.960 --> 00:02:54.479 So my daughter, I want people to learn. 00:02:54.560 --> 00:02:56.400 I want just people to laugh, I want them to learn too. 00:02:56.479 --> 00:03:01.199 So my daughter, one of my beautiful daughters, got four amazing daughters and a son who's awesome. 00:03:01.360 --> 00:03:04.800 So my daughter, when she was seven years old, she walked up to me crying. 00:03:07.599 --> 00:03:08.879 I was like, what's wrong? 00:03:09.039 --> 00:03:11.439 She said, My brother called me ignorant. 00:03:13.280 --> 00:03:14.879 I was like, Do you even know what that means? 00:03:14.960 --> 00:03:15.919 She's like, no. 00:03:17.599 --> 00:03:20.400 I was like, because you're ignorant. 00:03:28.159 --> 00:03:30.639 And you can't even use the same stuff on kids that we used to use. 00:03:30.719 --> 00:03:36.000 My dad would say stuff to me like, listen, if everybody in the world jumped off a bridge, would you jump off a bridge too? 00:03:36.240 --> 00:03:37.360 I tried that with my son. 00:03:37.439 --> 00:03:42.639 He was like, well, uh, it's a lot of pressure being the last person on earth. 00:03:42.719 --> 00:03:43.759 I don't know if I want to. 00:03:45.120 --> 00:03:46.400 I'll probably go with my friends. 00:03:46.560 --> 00:03:47.759 I probably would, Dad. 00:03:50.240 --> 00:03:51.919 And people ask me, what makes me laugh? 00:03:52.080 --> 00:03:53.680 Michael Jr., what makes you laugh? 00:03:53.840 --> 00:03:55.360 I like awkwardness. 00:03:55.680 --> 00:03:56.879 Awkwardness is awesome. 00:03:56.960 --> 00:04:02.000 Like I'll get on an elevator and I'll let the door close behind me and I won't turn around. 00:04:08.000 --> 00:04:09.680 And then I'll say, hello. 00:04:11.280 --> 00:04:14.000 And then everyone gets off on the next floor. 00:04:15.520 --> 00:04:18.000 And I just giggle my way to the top. 00:04:18.639 --> 00:04:22.319 But then I go to the stairwell, and those same people from the elevator. 00:04:24.240 --> 00:04:25.199 So much fun. 00:04:25.519 --> 00:04:27.360 Here's something else that's awkward yet fun. 00:04:27.519 --> 00:04:32.240 You ever go on a job interview, and part way through you realize, huh, I don't want to work here. 00:04:34.639 --> 00:04:36.639 At that point, you should just have fun. 00:04:36.800 --> 00:04:38.319 You should flip the whole interview. 00:04:38.399 --> 00:04:40.319 They're like, so tell me a little bit about yourself. 00:04:40.560 --> 00:04:41.279 Like, you know what? 00:04:41.439 --> 00:04:42.399 You go first. 00:04:44.879 --> 00:04:45.839 Answer this question. 00:04:46.000 --> 00:04:48.079 Where do you see me in five years? 00:04:52.560 --> 00:04:53.600 You know what else is fun? 00:04:53.680 --> 00:04:56.000 Like, I grew up in Michigan and it's real cold in Michigan, right? 00:04:56.160 --> 00:04:59.600 So recently I found some uh uh I found one of my old ski masks. 00:04:59.839 --> 00:05:04.480 So I just put it on and just start walking around DFW. 00:05:07.519 --> 00:05:11.120 And here's the thing, I won't gonna rob anybody, I just got a ski mask on, right? 00:05:11.199 --> 00:05:13.120 And I had my hand in my pocket and I went in the bank. 00:05:13.199 --> 00:05:14.000 I went in the bank. 00:05:14.079 --> 00:05:17.040 And um I'm in line like everybody else. 00:05:17.120 --> 00:05:18.959 I just happen to have a ski mask on. 00:05:19.600 --> 00:05:20.720 Have you been to the bank though? 00:05:20.800 --> 00:05:21.759 Like what they gonna do? 00:05:21.920 --> 00:05:24.319 Have you seen the security guards at the bank? 00:05:27.120 --> 00:05:28.639 It's always one extreme or another. 00:05:28.720 --> 00:05:31.120 It's like some young dude with pimples on his face. 00:05:31.439 --> 00:05:33.600 He like an insecurity guard. 00:05:37.120 --> 00:05:42.240 Or it's like a super old dude with six hearing aids, and like a social security guard. 00:05:45.759 --> 00:05:46.959 And they never got a gun. 00:05:47.040 --> 00:05:48.319 They just got a walkie-talkie. 00:05:48.480 --> 00:05:49.519 You're not a security guard. 00:05:49.600 --> 00:05:50.480 You a tattletale. 00:05:50.720 --> 00:05:51.439 That's what you are. 00:05:51.600 --> 00:05:52.800 You tattle tail. 00:05:53.279 --> 00:05:53.920 Ooh. 00:05:58.160 --> 00:05:59.600 Someone said I heard this phrase. 00:05:59.680 --> 00:06:03.040 Somebody said, You should don't judge anybody until you walked a mile in their shoes. 00:06:03.199 --> 00:06:05.600 I haven't even walked a mile in my own shoes. 00:06:05.920 --> 00:06:06.720 I got a car. 00:06:06.800 --> 00:06:08.399 What I'm walking around for. 00:06:09.439 --> 00:06:10.959 So I have these random little thoughts. 00:06:11.120 --> 00:06:15.040 Like, I don't drink 2% milk because I don't know what the rest of it is made out of. 00:06:19.040 --> 00:06:20.160 It's a math joke. 00:06:20.240 --> 00:06:22.399 There's 96% not accounted for. 00:06:28.079 --> 00:06:29.439 Some people just start praying for me. 00:06:29.839 --> 00:06:30.879 That's the second alert right there. 00:06:30.959 --> 00:06:31.920 It's a second alert. 00:06:32.079 --> 00:06:32.800 It's time to pray. 00:06:32.959 --> 00:06:34.480 He don't know what's going on. 00:06:35.839 --> 00:06:36.639 Second response. 00:06:36.800 --> 00:06:37.519 That's dope. 00:06:37.759 --> 00:06:39.199 I saw this commercial recently. 00:06:39.360 --> 00:06:40.160 This is just how I think. 00:06:40.240 --> 00:06:41.600 I'm just trying to help you out. 00:06:41.839 --> 00:06:43.040 I saw this commercial, right? 00:06:43.120 --> 00:06:43.839 This lady fell down. 00:06:43.920 --> 00:06:45.199 It was a life alert commercial. 00:06:45.279 --> 00:06:46.560 She fell, boom, she's on the ground. 00:06:46.720 --> 00:06:48.480 Help, I'm falling, and I can't get up. 00:06:48.720 --> 00:06:51.199 First thing I'm thinking, why don't the cameraman help her? 00:06:51.279 --> 00:06:51.759 Well, she. 00:07:00.560 --> 00:07:03.040 So we run our merchandise table a little different than most places. 00:07:03.439 --> 00:07:04.319 So this is what we do. 00:07:04.480 --> 00:07:11.199 First of all, all the proceeds from everything, because there's so much stuff going on in the world, it goes to uh it's going to a black family in America. 00:07:11.279 --> 00:07:12.560 I want to say that first. 00:07:17.759 --> 00:07:25.600 Well, we run our table a little different because I want people to have an experience around giving and around receiving and around noticing where you are with these things. 00:07:25.920 --> 00:07:28.639 So what we do is we we do this thing called communosity. 00:07:28.800 --> 00:07:30.399 Community generosity. 00:07:30.639 --> 00:07:31.439 This is how it works. 00:07:31.600 --> 00:07:34.160 We ask you to walk up to the table, buy whatever you want, that's fine. 00:07:34.240 --> 00:07:42.319 But if for any reason you can't afford something at our table, what we ask you to do, we ask you to walk up to the table, ask for what you want, and we give it to you. 00:07:43.120 --> 00:07:43.920 Like for real. 00:07:44.399 --> 00:07:49.759 If you have the means, what we ask you to do is we ask you to walk up to the table, buy what you want, buy some more, and leave it there for someone else. 00:07:50.000 --> 00:07:53.439 Again, it's called communosity, community generosity. 00:07:53.600 --> 00:08:00.079 So I really mean this because there's people here watching right now, even at the other campuses, you may not have much, and you have a hard time receiving. 00:08:00.240 --> 00:08:04.160 Well, maybe the reason you don't have much is because you have a hard time receiving. 00:08:04.879 --> 00:08:06.480 So I really, really, really mean this. 00:08:06.560 --> 00:08:10.959 I really want you to just be obedient and walk up to the table and do what it is you're supposed to do. 00:08:11.040 --> 00:08:14.160 There's also people who got a lot of money. 00:08:14.319 --> 00:08:15.920 You doing alright. 00:08:17.199 --> 00:08:20.399 But some of you have a hard time receiving as well. 00:08:21.360 --> 00:08:22.319 So what I want you to do. 00:08:22.399 --> 00:08:24.000 What we actually do is walk up to the table. 00:08:24.399 --> 00:08:29.439 If that's you, leave your money in your pocket, ask for an item, and let us give it to you. 00:08:29.600 --> 00:08:33.759 Because if you can't receive from me and the people around you, how can you receive from a God you can't see? 00:08:33.840 --> 00:08:36.399 Because he's gonna use people like me and the people around you. 00:08:36.559 --> 00:08:38.720 Here's my favorite part about communosity. 00:08:38.799 --> 00:08:39.759 There's two things. 00:08:40.320 --> 00:08:44.480 First thing is your job is to simply be obedient. 00:08:45.440 --> 00:08:48.240 Meaning, your job is to be obedient. 00:08:48.399 --> 00:08:51.840 There's people in Phoenix, Arizona who bought tickets to tonight's show. 00:08:52.720 --> 00:08:54.240 They're not gonna be here. 00:08:55.200 --> 00:08:57.039 So your job is simply to be obedient. 00:08:57.120 --> 00:09:00.559 It doesn't even matter what you're just practicing being obedient. 00:09:00.639 --> 00:09:06.639 The other part I love about this is one of my favorite sayings is how you do anything is how you do everything. 00:09:07.120 --> 00:09:13.840 So if you have a hard time going to the table to give, you're having a hard time giving across the board. 00:09:14.559 --> 00:09:19.759 If you have a hard time going there to receive, you're having a hard time receiving across the board. 00:09:20.080 --> 00:09:25.360 There was one lady at an event, I talked to her afterwards, she said, I could, I wanted a children's book, I just couldn't receive it, I couldn't do it. 00:09:25.440 --> 00:09:27.279 And I was like, Wow, that's messed up. 00:09:27.440 --> 00:09:28.559 I said, Are you married? 00:09:28.720 --> 00:09:29.519 She's like, No. 00:09:29.679 --> 00:09:30.879 I said, You want to be married? 00:09:30.960 --> 00:09:31.919 She said, Yeah. 00:09:32.240 --> 00:09:36.720 I said, Well, the chances are your husband has already paid you a compliment, but you couldn't receive it. 00:09:36.960 --> 00:09:38.480 And you just kept walking. 00:09:39.360 --> 00:09:41.919 How you do anything is how you do everything. 00:09:42.240 --> 00:09:44.399 Some of you won't even see the merchandise table. 00:09:44.799 --> 00:09:46.879 Just like you didn't see the homeless guy two weeks ago. 00:09:47.039 --> 00:09:48.000 We needed your help. 00:09:48.240 --> 00:09:55.519 At the other campuses, we're actually for the we've we're going to actually open this up online, which is crazy, which has to be God. 00:09:55.919 --> 00:10:02.960 Because you literally can go on the website and decide if you're going to give merchandise or you're going to receive it. 00:10:03.279 --> 00:10:03.919 For real. 00:10:04.639 --> 00:10:07.120 I don't know what that's going to turn out to be like. 00:10:08.240 --> 00:10:10.159 God's math is different than our math. 00:10:10.320 --> 00:10:14.720 He'll tell talk to the right people to give and the right people to receive, and your job is just to be obedient. 00:10:14.960 --> 00:10:16.879 And when I first started doing this, this stuff was scary. 00:10:16.960 --> 00:10:18.879 I gotta be real with you, because I was like, what, God? 00:10:19.039 --> 00:10:19.759 Will you, huh? 00:10:20.000 --> 00:10:20.639 What? 00:10:21.200 --> 00:10:27.279 But I had I literally, now as a result, the the cumularosity is one of my favorite parts of the event. 00:10:27.440 --> 00:10:29.440 Like, I love what happens. 00:10:29.600 --> 00:10:31.919 People are hovering, they're learning about themselves, people are crying. 00:10:32.000 --> 00:10:33.519 Some of you will be in tears. 00:10:34.320 --> 00:10:36.799 Because you'll learn about who you are and how you get down. 00:10:37.279 --> 00:10:46.399 I literally had to let go of what I wanted, which was to sell merchandise, so I could receive what I really needed, which is to change hearts. 00:10:46.639 --> 00:10:48.879 And that's literally what I'm talking about right now. 00:10:49.120 --> 00:10:52.879 You have to let go of what you want to receive what you really need. 00:10:53.440 --> 00:11:00.240 So another example is uh when I lived in New York, there was uh um some jokes I used to do that were, I thought all my jokes was cool, funny. 00:11:00.320 --> 00:11:04.320 I met Jesus, and then I made sure all the jokes were clean, but yeah, still funny, that's important. 00:11:04.559 --> 00:11:07.039 The jokes were clean before that, but I just had to make sure they line up. 00:11:07.120 --> 00:11:10.799 I like one of my favorite jokes is uh I used to do some of your mama jokes. 00:11:10.879 --> 00:11:14.240 I wrote like two in my whole life because I didn't, I don't want nobody talking about my mama. 00:11:14.320 --> 00:11:15.360 That's what it was. 00:11:15.759 --> 00:11:16.879 But recently I wrote this one. 00:11:16.960 --> 00:11:20.559 It was uh your mom's so fat um they can't even lift her up in prayer. 00:11:20.639 --> 00:11:24.960 That was my favorite, my favorite that's a big woman. 00:11:25.039 --> 00:11:25.600 That's a big woman. 00:11:25.679 --> 00:11:27.440 I'm just saying, that's a big woman. 00:11:30.639 --> 00:11:40.720 So I had this other joke, right, that I was doing, it wasn't anywhere near like that joke, like this joke was clean, it was great, it was awesome, and God asked me to stop doing it. 00:11:41.279 --> 00:11:42.080 It's a different joke. 00:11:42.159 --> 00:11:43.360 I'm not even I'm not gonna do the joke now. 00:11:43.440 --> 00:11:46.399 He just asked me to stop doing it, and I couldn't understand why. 00:11:46.639 --> 00:11:50.480 If I told this joke to you right now, you'll be like, that is hysterical, and there's nothing wrong. 00:11:50.559 --> 00:11:53.919 I could tell this joke to the Pope, and he'd be like, That's funny. 00:11:54.399 --> 00:11:57.120 And God said, I don't want you to do that joke anymore. 00:11:57.440 --> 00:12:04.000 And then I'm on stage in New York and I get heckled by this guy on that same subject for that joke. 00:12:04.480 --> 00:12:06.080 This is a great opportunity. 00:12:06.240 --> 00:12:10.480 I'll seem like the uh Ninja King or something if I pull this joke out right now. 00:12:11.039 --> 00:12:13.039 I just had to let the opportunity go by. 00:12:13.840 --> 00:12:20.320 The next day I'm in a writing session and I come up with this phrase, this joke premise of oversaved. 00:12:21.840 --> 00:12:23.120 Let me explain to you about oversaved. 00:12:23.200 --> 00:12:24.879 Oversaved is some creepy Christians. 00:12:24.960 --> 00:12:26.960 There's some creepy Christians out there. 00:12:27.679 --> 00:12:29.759 If you don't know any, it's you. 00:12:34.799 --> 00:12:42.080 So we talk about creepy Christians and how some of them are oversaved, like they do weird stuff, like they only got sheets on their bed because Jesus is the comforter. 00:12:42.399 --> 00:12:48.159 Um they only eat pizza that's been delivered, right? 00:12:48.399 --> 00:13:00.240 So listen, I've come up with an entire series of oversaved jokes the day after I let go of this one joke that was probably 30 seconds long. 00:13:00.399 --> 00:13:02.639 This series is probably 30 minutes of jokes. 00:13:02.720 --> 00:13:08.480 Not only that, but people are using the language of oversaved to initiate conver spiritual conversations with people. 00:13:08.639 --> 00:13:14.320 Don't say stuff like, listen, I'm not trying to be oversaved, but I think like they're actually using it as a tool. 00:13:14.639 --> 00:13:20.879 I didn't even know that they could use anything I would say as a tool, but I am blessed by that. 00:13:21.840 --> 00:13:28.799 I had to let go of what I wanted so I could receive what I really needed, even though I didn't know that's what I needed. 00:13:29.519 --> 00:13:34.320 So there's a um a movie that I'm in that's coming out next year. 00:13:34.559 --> 00:13:34.799 Right? 00:13:34.879 --> 00:13:35.759 So I started this movie. 00:13:35.840 --> 00:13:37.360 The movie is called Selfie Dad. 00:13:37.600 --> 00:13:46.480 And uh when they were first trying to get me to do the film, I've turned some films down before, and I was like, just because if it don't line up with the character, I just I'm cool, I don't gotta do movies. 00:13:46.639 --> 00:13:49.919 At first, when I first started doing comedy, I just wanted to do movies. 00:13:50.159 --> 00:13:53.600 I just and then after a while, I was like, you know what, I'm cool, I'm just gonna do it. 00:13:54.159 --> 00:13:59.200 This movie, I read the script, it's a comedy about the Bible. 00:14:00.320 --> 00:14:02.399 First of all, how do you even do that? 00:14:03.440 --> 00:14:04.879 I think we might have pulled it off. 00:14:04.960 --> 00:14:06.799 I'm not sure, they're still editing. 00:14:08.639 --> 00:14:16.399 When the writer slash director was writing a script, he was writing a script with himself in mind as the character, because that's how he writes. 00:14:16.639 --> 00:14:19.120 And then they were going to try to get me to play the role. 00:14:19.360 --> 00:14:22.559 Now, this is a Jewish white dude from Los Angeles. 00:14:24.240 --> 00:14:26.000 So the script needed some adjustments. 00:14:26.080 --> 00:14:27.840 So let me set it up for you. 00:14:29.120 --> 00:14:31.519 So the name of the film is called Selfie Dad. 00:14:31.600 --> 00:14:39.440 It's about a dad who is a little selfish, he's not really taking care of his kids right now, and then he starts a YouTube channel and it blows up. 00:14:39.600 --> 00:14:42.480 All his YouTube videos are called How to videos. 00:14:42.960 --> 00:14:56.080 So um, I'm actually gonna show you a clip of this, but what happens is um he just got angry, he got upset because he lost one of his endorsement deals, so he hits a wall and his hand is really, really, really hurting, and he's driving down the street really fast. 00:14:56.240 --> 00:14:58.000 He gets pulled over by the police. 00:14:58.159 --> 00:15:04.559 Now in the script, it says, Ben, which is my character, when Ben gets pulled over by the police, he's really angry. 00:15:04.799 --> 00:15:07.519 I said, Um, no, I'm not. 00:15:08.240 --> 00:15:09.679 He was like, No, no, no, you don't understand. 00:15:09.759 --> 00:15:12.399 So when you're driving down the street and the police are behind you, you're mad. 00:15:12.559 --> 00:15:14.399 I'm like, I ain't mad, bro. 00:15:14.879 --> 00:15:15.840 He's like, why not? 00:15:16.000 --> 00:15:19.840 I was like, because black people really shouldn't be mad when they get put over by the police. 00:15:19.919 --> 00:15:21.120 I just want to throw that out real quick. 00:15:21.200 --> 00:15:22.399 I just want to throw that out there. 00:15:22.559 --> 00:15:24.399 It's just not a good, it's not a good move. 00:15:24.559 --> 00:15:28.240 And he said, and then he said, Well, okay, how about this? 00:15:28.320 --> 00:15:30.799 When you get out the car, I was like, hold on, hold on. 00:15:31.039 --> 00:15:37.279 Um yeah, I'm not I'm not gonna get out the car. 00:15:37.360 --> 00:15:38.159 That's what's not gonna happen. 00:15:38.240 --> 00:15:39.519 I'm not gonna get out the car. 00:15:39.679 --> 00:15:41.279 He was like, Well, it's it's just a movie. 00:15:41.360 --> 00:15:43.279 I was like, Yeah, but we want to be realistic, right? 00:15:43.440 --> 00:15:45.279 Because we're letting them know the Bible's real. 00:15:45.360 --> 00:15:46.240 Let's make everything real. 00:15:46.399 --> 00:15:47.279 I'm not getting out the car. 00:15:47.360 --> 00:15:48.320 He was like, Well, what would you do? 00:15:48.399 --> 00:15:49.919 I was like, I don't know, I'm scared right now. 00:15:50.080 --> 00:15:51.279 Actually, think about it. 00:15:51.360 --> 00:15:52.159 I'm just I'm scared. 00:15:52.240 --> 00:15:53.120 Think about it. 00:15:54.399 --> 00:16:00.720 So the whole goal in this scene for this comedy, Pete, the whole goal is for things to escalate, and then I end up in jail. 00:16:00.879 --> 00:16:04.000 So literally, we're on set and we don't have a script for this part. 00:16:04.240 --> 00:16:08.960 So everything that you're about to see, we just kind of improv and made this thing happen. 00:16:09.600 --> 00:16:12.240 But he had to let go so we can get to this place right here. 00:16:12.399 --> 00:16:13.200 Check it. 00:16:16.320 --> 00:16:16.639 Okay. 00:16:17.279 --> 00:16:20.000 First thing I need to do is calm myself down. 00:16:20.080 --> 00:16:22.480 I'm getting pulled over by the police. 00:16:22.639 --> 00:16:24.480 Okay, make a make a video. 00:16:24.559 --> 00:16:25.519 That's what I'm gonna do. 00:16:25.759 --> 00:16:28.960 Make sure there's angle on this camera so they can see both of us. 00:16:29.039 --> 00:16:30.559 I gotta make a video for two reasons. 00:16:30.639 --> 00:16:32.000 One, because I'm selfie dad. 00:16:32.159 --> 00:16:35.679 But two, I need to make sure things are safe. 00:16:35.919 --> 00:16:40.159 When the police officer rolls up, make sure that you don't have more bass than them. 00:16:40.240 --> 00:16:42.080 Try to take all the bass out your voice. 00:16:42.240 --> 00:16:43.360 Hello, officer. 00:16:43.600 --> 00:16:44.399 Hello, officer. 00:16:44.559 --> 00:16:47.200 You may put the hands on the steering wheel or they're going behind your back. 00:16:47.279 --> 00:16:48.480 So we gotta work this out. 00:16:48.639 --> 00:16:49.519 Gotta work this out. 00:16:49.600 --> 00:16:49.759 Okay. 00:16:51.440 --> 00:16:54.159 Also, no immediate eye contact. 00:16:54.799 --> 00:16:55.840 Eyeballs only. 00:16:56.240 --> 00:16:57.840 Only thing turning is your eyeballs. 00:16:57.919 --> 00:16:58.639 You just don't even move. 00:16:58.720 --> 00:16:59.120 Here you come. 00:16:59.360 --> 00:16:59.840 Here he comes. 00:16:59.919 --> 00:17:00.480 You're not mad. 00:17:00.639 --> 00:17:01.120 Breathe. 00:17:02.639 --> 00:17:03.519 Afternoon, sir. 00:17:04.720 --> 00:17:05.759 Hello, officer. 00:17:07.519 --> 00:17:08.480 Hello, officer. 00:17:08.559 --> 00:17:09.359 How are you? 00:17:09.839 --> 00:17:10.480 Good. 00:17:10.880 --> 00:17:12.480 Fuck you doing 81. 00:17:12.880 --> 00:17:15.680 When they see the license, registration, and proof of insurance. 00:17:17.519 --> 00:17:19.119 I thought it was the police. 00:17:19.359 --> 00:17:20.559 It's the bro lease. 00:17:20.640 --> 00:17:21.680 We're gonna be alright. 00:17:22.240 --> 00:17:23.200 What's up, dawg? 00:17:23.279 --> 00:17:24.640 Hey, who your people? 00:17:25.519 --> 00:17:28.400 License, registration, proof of insurance. 00:17:29.200 --> 00:17:30.400 Calm yourself down, bro. 00:17:30.559 --> 00:17:32.240 Hey, I got a selfie dad mug for you. 00:17:32.319 --> 00:17:33.200 You want a selfie dad mug? 00:17:33.279 --> 00:17:33.759 You drink coffee, right? 00:17:34.000 --> 00:17:34.720 You trying to bribe me, sir? 00:17:35.279 --> 00:17:36.079 I know you like donuts. 00:17:36.240 --> 00:17:36.880 I got some coffee. 00:17:37.599 --> 00:17:38.559 You get a mug for some. 00:17:38.799 --> 00:17:39.920 Okay, let me get it for you real quick. 00:17:40.160 --> 00:17:40.559 Hey, sir. 00:17:40.799 --> 00:17:42.000 Keep your hands on the steering wheel quick. 00:17:42.240 --> 00:17:43.200 I'm gonna show you this thing real quick. 00:17:43.440 --> 00:17:43.599 What? 00:17:43.759 --> 00:17:44.880 I'm gonna need you to step out of the door. 00:17:45.039 --> 00:17:48.400 You can just keep your hands where I can see it. 00:17:55.920 --> 00:17:59.359 So they're not done editing yet, but that's one of their favorite scenes so far. 00:17:59.440 --> 00:18:06.720 But literally, the director he had to let go of what he wanted so he could get what he actually needed, which is deeper. 00:18:06.799 --> 00:18:08.319 Now that I think about it, it's a Jewish dude. 00:18:08.400 --> 00:18:09.200 That's hysterical. 00:18:09.359 --> 00:18:12.960 Anyway, um, my son, who's brilliant, who I love, right? 00:18:13.039 --> 00:18:16.960 I was telling him about this message I was gonna do, and he says to me, He says, Dad, you know what? 00:18:17.119 --> 00:18:23.839 When Peter and the disciples were in the garden right before Jesus got captured, they didn't want him to die. 00:18:26.000 --> 00:18:31.599 But they had to let go of what they wanted so we all could receive what we really needed. 00:18:31.759 --> 00:18:33.519 I was like, man, that is my son. 00:18:33.759 --> 00:18:35.039 That's awesome. 00:18:35.359 --> 00:18:41.680 So one time I was doing a show, uh, this is probably maybe almost 10 years ago. 00:18:41.759 --> 00:18:42.799 I'm in Phoenix, Arizona. 00:18:42.880 --> 00:18:46.480 I'm doing a show, like 3,500 people at this show, and we're having a great time. 00:18:46.559 --> 00:18:51.759 But right before I got on stage, um, a pastor friend of mine was in the green room with me and we're talking. 00:18:51.920 --> 00:18:53.359 And we pulled up this picture online. 00:18:53.519 --> 00:18:56.799 We had the tech guy pull up a picture, and we're looking at the picture and we're talking about it. 00:18:56.960 --> 00:19:00.079 And um, this is a hard picture to look at. 00:19:00.160 --> 00:19:01.519 Like it's it's a kind of a hard picture. 00:19:01.599 --> 00:19:12.960 We're talking about the story behind it and all of the stuff, and then I go out on stage and I go do the comedy, and now on a scale of one to ten, the audience is probably laughing at maybe a seven and a half, which is a really good show. 00:19:13.200 --> 00:19:15.440 So we're laughing, we're having a good time. 00:19:15.759 --> 00:19:20.319 So, to help you understand how I do comedy, whenever I'm doing comedy, let's say I'm doing joke number one. 00:19:20.480 --> 00:19:29.599 I'm presenting joke number one, but at the same time, I'm doing the math on joke number two and how you may respond to joke number two based off how you're currently responding to joke number one. 00:19:29.759 --> 00:19:36.000 Once I have that one locked and confirmed, I'll move on to joke number three and then do the same math, and then maybe even four. 00:19:36.160 --> 00:19:40.960 I used to go as far as six jokes deep, even on presenting joke number one. 00:19:41.839 --> 00:19:46.319 But I met Jesus, and he wanted to talk to me while I'm on stage. 00:19:48.480 --> 00:19:55.759 So he's talking to me between the gaps, and I'm up, I'm doing a show, we're at a seven and a half, and I'm I hear God say, show him the picture. 00:19:58.160 --> 00:19:59.279 Show him what picture, Lord. 00:19:59.359 --> 00:20:00.160 I don't know what you're talking about. 00:20:00.240 --> 00:20:01.279 I don't even remember no picture. 00:20:01.359 --> 00:20:02.559 I'm not gonna show him that picture. 00:20:02.640 --> 00:20:03.519 I do comedy. 00:20:03.680 --> 00:20:05.119 That picture is not funny. 00:20:05.279 --> 00:20:07.759 Still presenting the joke, smiling, we're having a great time. 00:20:08.000 --> 00:20:08.880 So I move on. 00:20:09.119 --> 00:20:13.519 A few minutes later, I clearly hear God say, Show him the picture. 00:20:14.799 --> 00:20:16.559 So I show him this picture. 00:20:19.440 --> 00:20:23.039 That is a picture of a vulture and a little girl. 00:20:23.759 --> 00:20:28.480 Now the little girl is really sick, about to die, and obviously the vulture is ready to eat her. 00:20:28.640 --> 00:20:32.400 Outside of this picture, what you can't see is there's a food bank that she's trying to get to. 00:20:32.640 --> 00:20:35.440 And the photographer obviously is in position as well. 00:20:35.759 --> 00:20:42.960 Now, the photographer actually waited 20 minutes for the vulture to open up his wings so he could take that picture because he thought it would be better. 00:20:44.480 --> 00:20:46.160 So then the photographer takes this picture. 00:20:46.319 --> 00:20:47.440 You can go ahead and take it down now. 00:20:47.519 --> 00:20:55.920 He takes the picture, and um, then he smokes a cigarette, gets on a plane, comes back to the States, and he actually wins the Pillister Prize. 00:20:56.000 --> 00:20:58.640 It's the greatest prize you could win as a photographer. 00:20:58.880 --> 00:21:00.240 And people kept asking him the question. 00:21:00.319 --> 00:21:01.759 It was like, what happened to the little girl? 00:21:02.160 --> 00:21:03.200 What happened to the little girl? 00:21:03.359 --> 00:21:08.400 So he wins this prize, and six months later he commits suicide. 00:21:09.839 --> 00:21:19.200 And I explained to my audience, just like I'm explaining to you, I said, had he been of the mindset to save the little girl, I believe that he himself would be alive right now. 00:21:19.599 --> 00:21:24.559 And then I asked my audience the question I said, I said, Who are you in this picture? 00:21:24.799 --> 00:21:29.680