WEBVTT 00:00:00.160 --> 00:00:02.319 I've loved the uh one prayer series. 00:00:02.479 --> 00:00:07.440 I've been listening to everyone speak about their one prayer, and they have some great prayers. 00:00:07.679 --> 00:00:09.359 Here's my one prayer. 00:00:09.599 --> 00:00:14.400 Here's the one prayer I would pray if I could pray just one prayer. 00:00:14.720 --> 00:00:21.519 My one prayer is that everyone would know God and understand that God's ways work. 00:00:22.320 --> 00:00:26.879 That everyone would know God and understand that God's ways work. 00:00:27.199 --> 00:00:32.479 Not long ago, Pastor Robert told me, he said, Steve, you're the most blessed person I know. 00:00:33.359 --> 00:00:36.399 That's pretty good from a guy who wrote a book called The Blessed Life, right? 00:00:36.560 --> 00:00:37.520 I mean that's pretty good. 00:00:37.759 --> 00:00:38.399 And he's right. 00:00:38.719 --> 00:00:39.600 I'm extremely blessed. 00:00:39.679 --> 00:00:44.240 I have a wonderful marriage with Melody, and I'm going to talk about that in a few minutes. 00:00:45.039 --> 00:00:51.039 Last year at Father's Day, I talked about the incredible relationship I have with my two daughters, and now my new son-in-law, Gabe. 00:00:51.439 --> 00:00:54.000 I've been extremely blessed financially and in business. 00:00:54.159 --> 00:00:55.679 I've been blessed in ministry. 00:00:55.840 --> 00:00:57.600 I've been blessed in relationships. 00:00:57.759 --> 00:00:59.679 And here's what I found out. 00:01:00.479 --> 00:01:05.200 In every area where you do things God's way, you'll be blessed. 00:01:05.599 --> 00:01:06.560 You'll be blessed. 00:01:06.640 --> 00:01:11.280 And so I'm excited to share this today about God's ways because I want you to be blessed. 00:01:11.439 --> 00:01:13.280 I want you to live the abundant life. 00:01:13.439 --> 00:01:19.840 I meet with people every day, and they have problems in their marriage, and they have problems in their family, they have problems in their business. 00:01:19.920 --> 00:01:21.120 And it breaks my heart. 00:01:21.200 --> 00:01:22.480 I mean, it breaks my heart. 00:01:22.560 --> 00:01:25.920 But here's the only answer that I have it's God. 00:01:26.640 --> 00:01:29.280 The good news is he's the only answer we need. 00:01:29.760 --> 00:01:34.079 And in every area where we'll do things God's way, God's ways work. 00:01:35.280 --> 00:01:44.239 Now I uh I was I was not brought up as a Christian, and so uh I didn't I didn't know anything about God's ways. 00:01:44.400 --> 00:01:50.079 And and so when I started finding out about God's ways, I got excited because most of the Christian life is about God's ways. 00:01:50.239 --> 00:01:53.359 You know, when David Smith talked about integrity, that's God's way. 00:01:53.599 --> 00:01:57.920 When uh when uh Chris Hodges talked about eternal focus, that's God's way. 00:01:58.079 --> 00:02:00.799 When Mark Rutland talked about brokenness, that's God's way. 00:02:01.040 --> 00:02:02.640 Great faith is God's way. 00:02:02.799 --> 00:02:05.120 Walking in love is God's way. 00:02:05.280 --> 00:02:08.000 God's ways work in every area of life. 00:02:08.240 --> 00:02:11.680 And God's ways will work in your life, or you'll apply them in your life. 00:02:11.840 --> 00:02:16.159 And here's the thing I would, as an elder at Gateway Church, I want you all to understand. 00:02:16.400 --> 00:02:23.520 As these people come and speak in this series, don't just get information, get impartation. 00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:24.319 Okay? 00:02:24.560 --> 00:02:26.639 Not just information, get impartation. 00:02:26.719 --> 00:02:30.000 So today I want to impart some things about God's ways. 00:02:30.479 --> 00:02:33.439 Because before I became a Christian, I did things my way. 00:02:33.919 --> 00:02:35.199 I did things my way. 00:02:35.439 --> 00:02:37.039 I was a wild man. 00:02:37.360 --> 00:02:44.560 I drank, I was immoral, I was rebellious, uh, I was not as bad as Pastor Robert. 00:02:47.599 --> 00:02:50.080 I've heard some stories you haven't heard. 00:02:50.800 --> 00:02:54.639 And I was not as bad as Pastor Robert, but I was I was out of control. 00:02:54.719 --> 00:02:55.759 I was a bad person. 00:02:55.919 --> 00:03:03.680 By the time I graduated from college, I'd been in 13 car wrecks and over 100 fistfights. 00:03:04.000 --> 00:03:05.439 Well, that's a bunch, right? 00:03:05.599 --> 00:03:17.439 And so I remember my senior year in college, I was taking a road trip with a with two of my uh fraternity buddies, and I remember on New Year's Eve, we ended up in an orange grove in Florida. 00:03:17.599 --> 00:03:23.840 And there were three of us, and we were dressed in our cowboy hats and cowboy boots, and there were about 200 people from Florida. 00:03:24.000 --> 00:03:29.919 And unfortunately, I had a friend that liked to pick a fight and then call me over and watch me fight. 00:03:30.080 --> 00:03:31.840 I mean, it was a really good friend, right? 00:03:32.319 --> 00:03:33.360 So that's what he did. 00:03:33.439 --> 00:03:35.759 He started talking trash about Florida. 00:03:35.840 --> 00:03:43.039 And so the next thing I knew, there were three of us standing in a circle of about 30 to 40 guys who are about to beat us up. 00:03:44.080 --> 00:03:49.439 And then all of a sudden, this orange crate comes out of the crowd and hits my buddy in the head and knocks him out. 00:03:49.680 --> 00:03:51.360 And now there's two of us. 00:03:52.800 --> 00:03:59.039 I don't know about you, but I'm so glad that God, even before I was a Christian, God protected me. 00:03:59.199 --> 00:03:59.840 You know what I'm saying? 00:04:00.000 --> 00:04:00.560 He protected me. 00:04:00.800 --> 00:04:06.000 And it's like I knew there was a God, I knew he's protected me, but and I was seeking for God, but I was just out of control. 00:04:06.159 --> 00:04:08.960 So uh as I'm standing there, it's like God gave me a thought. 00:04:09.199 --> 00:04:11.840 And so I said, Who's the toughest guy here? 00:04:12.240 --> 00:04:13.759 And nobody moved. 00:04:14.080 --> 00:04:16.160 And I said, Who's the toughest guy here? 00:04:16.399 --> 00:04:18.639 And this guy steps out of the crowd, he said, I am. 00:04:18.800 --> 00:04:20.319 And I said, Well, you're in trouble. 00:04:20.560 --> 00:04:26.160 So I went over and I kind of knocked him senseless, and I put him in his headlock. 00:04:26.480 --> 00:04:35.519 And so I'm holding him, and it's a little-known piece of information that if you take your thumbnail and put it between someone's teeth and their gum and twist, it's really painful. 00:04:35.759 --> 00:04:36.079 Okay? 00:04:36.399 --> 00:04:44.319 So I put my thumb in there and he starts screaming, ah! Ah! And I said, I'm breaking his neck! I'm breaking his neck. 00:04:44.399 --> 00:04:45.839 If anybody moves, I'm gonna kill him. 00:04:46.000 --> 00:04:46.399 Just like that. 00:04:46.639 --> 00:04:48.000 Everybody just froze, you know. 00:04:48.319 --> 00:04:55.279 And so I started dragging him to the car, and we drug our other buddy, and dragged him to the car, and we hopped in the car, dropped this guy, and we took off. 00:05:02.000 --> 00:05:04.720 And I remember as we were driving away, I had two thoughts. 00:05:04.879 --> 00:05:08.000 Number one, my way's not working very well. 00:05:09.120 --> 00:05:13.199 And number two, something has to change in my life. 00:05:13.439 --> 00:05:14.959 Because my life was a mess. 00:05:15.120 --> 00:05:18.240 I could have written a book called The Unblessed Life. 00:05:19.199 --> 00:05:20.079 And I was a mess. 00:05:20.160 --> 00:05:22.240 I went to God and said, God, my life's a mess. 00:05:22.399 --> 00:05:23.600 I need you to take over. 00:05:23.759 --> 00:05:25.360 I need you to change me, God. 00:05:25.519 --> 00:05:31.759 And I came to Jesus Christ, and I didn't just make him uh Savior of my life, I made him Lord of my life. 00:05:32.079 --> 00:05:33.519 And my life changed that day. 00:05:33.680 --> 00:05:40.079 And when I became a Christian, I started pursuing two things: knowing God and learning his ways. 00:05:40.319 --> 00:05:44.959 I started pursuing knowing God and learning his ways because God's ways are important. 00:05:45.360 --> 00:05:52.160 The word way or ways is in the Bible eight hundred and sixty-seven times. 00:05:52.319 --> 00:05:53.360 Is that amazing? 00:05:53.600 --> 00:05:55.199 Eight hundred and sixty-seven times. 00:05:55.439 --> 00:05:59.360 Matthew 7, 13 and 14 says, Enter by the narrow gate. 00:05:59.600 --> 00:06:03.439 For wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction. 00:06:03.680 --> 00:06:13.199 And there are many who go in by it, because narrow is the gate, and difficult is the way which leads to life, and there are few who find it. 00:06:13.360 --> 00:06:17.920 Jesus tells us there is a narrow way that leads to life, abundant life and blessing. 00:06:18.079 --> 00:06:20.399 The narrow way is God's way. 00:06:20.720 --> 00:06:26.959 John 10, 10 says, I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly. 00:06:27.360 --> 00:06:29.439 God's ways work. 00:06:30.319 --> 00:06:35.920 So I asked Pastor Robert how many points I should have in my sermon today, and he said, at least one. 00:06:39.439 --> 00:06:43.519 So my first point is, our ways do not work. 00:06:43.920 --> 00:06:45.680 Our ways do not work. 00:06:45.839 --> 00:06:47.839 We want to do things our way. 00:06:48.079 --> 00:06:51.519 The problem is your way and my way don't work. 00:06:51.920 --> 00:06:52.959 They just don't work. 00:06:53.040 --> 00:06:56.639 And most of the time we don't know God's ways, though we think we do. 00:06:56.879 --> 00:07:08.079 I remember when Millie and I were first married and was approaching our first anniversary, and I'm praying about what kind of gift to get her, and I think, well, we've and we didn't have any money, and we had these junker cars, and I thought, I'll get her a car. 00:07:08.240 --> 00:07:15.920 So uh we had this car at our construction company, and it was a 1978 Ford Granada. 00:07:16.000 --> 00:07:18.079 Does anybody remember the 1978 Ford Granada? 00:07:18.160 --> 00:07:18.399 Yeah. 00:07:18.560 --> 00:07:20.399 It wasn't like real stylish, okay? 00:07:20.560 --> 00:07:21.439 But it was cheap. 00:07:21.600 --> 00:07:26.160 So uh I drove home one night and and I took Melody out on a date, and we're driving along. 00:07:26.240 --> 00:07:28.480 I said, honey, uh, what do you think of the car? 00:07:28.639 --> 00:07:30.240 And she said, it's fine. 00:07:30.480 --> 00:07:32.480 And I thought, she likes it. 00:07:32.879 --> 00:07:34.079 She likes it. 00:07:35.839 --> 00:07:38.560 But you know, God's way is to get wise counsel. 00:07:38.800 --> 00:07:45.519 So I called my brother-in-law, Melody's brother, and I said, Chris, uh, what do you think about me getting Melody this car for our anniversary gift? 00:07:45.839 --> 00:07:47.759 He said, Steve, she's not gonna like it. 00:07:48.000 --> 00:07:49.759 And I thought, what's not to like? 00:07:50.000 --> 00:07:51.839 I mean, it's eighteen hundred dollars. 00:07:52.079 --> 00:07:54.560 So uh so I bought it. 00:07:54.959 --> 00:07:57.600 God's ways is to listen to wise counsel. 00:07:57.759 --> 00:08:03.439 But I bought the car, and I and on our anniversary date, I took it home and I parked it in front of our apartment. 00:08:03.519 --> 00:08:05.360 I put this big red bow around it. 00:08:05.600 --> 00:08:08.240 And I went inside and said, Happy anniversary, honey. 00:08:08.399 --> 00:08:09.759 She said, Happy anniversary. 00:08:09.920 --> 00:08:12.240 I said, Melody, I got you a gift. 00:08:12.480 --> 00:08:13.360 She said, Really? 00:08:13.519 --> 00:08:15.040 And her eyes got real big, you know. 00:08:15.279 --> 00:08:16.879 I said, Yeah, close your eyes. 00:08:17.040 --> 00:08:21.120 So I led her outside, stopped in front of the car, and said, Open your eyes. 00:08:21.360 --> 00:08:23.920 Surprise! And she said, What is it? 00:08:24.079 --> 00:08:25.839 I said, It's your anniversary gift. 00:08:26.079 --> 00:08:27.680 And she started crying. 00:08:28.319 --> 00:08:30.240 I thought, she likes it. 00:08:32.799 --> 00:08:34.320 She didn't like it. 00:08:34.960 --> 00:08:41.759 Proverbs 14, 12 says, There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death. 00:08:46.559 --> 00:08:50.799 See, we don't do things God's way, and many times we don't think his thoughts. 00:08:50.960 --> 00:08:55.679 I remember I was at church one day and I was talking to this couple, and I said, Hey, how are things going? 00:08:55.919 --> 00:08:59.840 And the the wife just immediately just launches into this lintany of problems. 00:09:00.000 --> 00:09:02.240 Well, my husband's job is not going well. 00:09:02.399 --> 00:09:04.000 We're having trouble with our son. 00:09:04.320 --> 00:09:07.679 We have health problems, uh, we have some financial problems. 00:09:07.840 --> 00:09:09.120 She just kind of goes on and on. 00:09:09.279 --> 00:09:13.440 And at the end she said, but but I know that God never gives you more than you can handle. 00:09:13.759 --> 00:09:14.720 I said, What was that? 00:09:14.799 --> 00:09:17.600 And she said, Well, God never gives you more than you can handle. 00:09:17.759 --> 00:09:19.600 And I said, You know, that sounds really good. 00:09:19.759 --> 00:09:21.919 The problem is it's just not scriptural. 00:09:22.240 --> 00:09:26.559 I said, because God will almost always give you more than you can handle. 00:09:26.799 --> 00:09:29.279 He'll just never give you more than he can handle. 00:09:29.519 --> 00:09:29.759 Right? 00:09:29.919 --> 00:09:32.240 And I said to her, I think I know the scripture you're thinking about. 00:09:32.320 --> 00:09:44.399 1 Corinthians 10, 13 says, No temptation has overtaken you, but such as is common to man, and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you're able, but with the temptation will provide a way of escape that you may endure it. 00:09:44.480 --> 00:09:46.080 I said, That's talking about temptation. 00:09:46.240 --> 00:09:47.919 You're talking about what you can handle. 00:09:48.080 --> 00:09:51.519 I said, the Christian life was never designed for you to handle it. 00:09:51.679 --> 00:09:55.440 The Christian life was designed for us to cast all our cares upon Him. 00:09:55.679 --> 00:09:58.080 It was designed for us to depend on Him. 00:09:58.320 --> 00:10:03.200 It was designed so that we would do great things for God where He would have to come through in a supernatural way. 00:10:03.279 --> 00:10:05.519 And then He gets the glory and He gets the credit. 00:10:05.840 --> 00:10:08.960 God will almost always give you more than you can handle. 00:10:09.200 --> 00:10:11.679 He'll just never give you more than He can handle. 00:10:11.919 --> 00:10:18.240 Isaiah 55, 8 and 9 says, For my thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways my ways, says the Lord. 00:10:18.480 --> 00:10:25.279 For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts. 00:10:25.519 --> 00:10:28.720 See, God's not sitting in heaven saying you'd better do it my way. 00:10:28.879 --> 00:10:30.799 He says, This is the only way that works. 00:10:30.960 --> 00:10:31.600 I love you. 00:10:31.759 --> 00:10:33.039 I want you to be blessed. 00:10:33.200 --> 00:10:34.320 Follow my way. 00:10:34.559 --> 00:10:40.960 And so I want you to encourage you today to do things God's way, because point number two is God's ways work. 00:10:41.759 --> 00:10:44.000 God's ways work in every area of life. 00:10:44.159 --> 00:10:46.960 And today I want to give you some examples in marriage. 00:10:47.120 --> 00:10:52.960 Now, if you're not married, don't don't tune me out because I'm going to share some principles at work in every area of life. 00:10:53.039 --> 00:10:54.720 They apply to every area of life. 00:10:54.960 --> 00:10:55.279 Okay? 00:10:56.720 --> 00:11:05.360 For years, every six months or so, I say to Melody, on a scale of one to ten, with ten being best, where are we in our relationship? 00:11:05.679 --> 00:11:10.080 And if she says eight, I'll say to her, well, what does it take to get to eight and a half? 00:11:10.240 --> 00:11:10.480 Right? 00:11:10.720 --> 00:11:13.919 If she says eight and a half, I'll say, what does it take to get to a nine? 00:11:14.799 --> 00:11:19.039 Guys, do you understand that our wives know how to improve our relationship? 00:11:19.279 --> 00:11:20.480 Is that right, wives? 00:11:20.720 --> 00:11:22.000 Yeah, yeah, lots of nodes. 00:11:22.159 --> 00:11:22.320 Yeah. 00:11:23.039 --> 00:11:27.919 And here's the thing: wives are much more realistic about where their relationship is than guys are. 00:11:28.159 --> 00:11:29.360 You ask a guy, how's your marriage? 00:11:29.519 --> 00:11:31.360 He'll say, Oh, I don't know, six, seven. 00:11:31.679 --> 00:11:32.720 Wife will say, two. 00:11:34.559 --> 00:11:35.120 Right? 00:11:35.600 --> 00:11:41.360 I'll never forget we were teaching a marriage class, and there were seven couples in the group, and it was our first night in the group. 00:11:41.440 --> 00:11:47.120 And so we thought, let's just have everybody go around and say where they are in their relationship and what they expect out of the class. 00:11:47.200 --> 00:11:51.200 So we got about halfway around the group and we got to Ron, who was a salesman. 00:11:51.360 --> 00:11:53.360 And we said, Ron, where are you in your relationship? 00:11:53.600 --> 00:11:55.279 He said, Well, you know, things are going okay. 00:11:55.440 --> 00:11:59.200 We got a few little rough patches, little problems to iron out, you know, just a few little things. 00:11:59.279 --> 00:12:00.320 We just need a little tune-up. 00:12:00.559 --> 00:12:01.120 It's okay. 00:12:01.279 --> 00:12:03.279 Turned to his wife and said, How are y'all doing? 00:12:03.440 --> 00:12:06.480 And she said, If this doesn't work, we're getting a divorce. 00:12:07.600 --> 00:12:11.919 Women are more realistic about our relationships. 00:12:12.240 --> 00:12:20.559 So anyway, in February of this year, I said to Melody, on a scale of one to ten, with ten being best, where are we in our relationship? 00:12:20.879 --> 00:12:23.919 For the first time ever, she said, ten. 00:12:24.720 --> 00:12:25.039 Huh? 00:12:25.120 --> 00:12:25.600 Is that good? 00:12:25.679 --> 00:12:26.799 Can we give God a hand? 00:12:26.960 --> 00:12:27.600 Yeah. 00:12:28.480 --> 00:12:30.720 Hey, listen, I was excited. 00:12:30.879 --> 00:12:34.159 I mean, I was I've been working all my life for this, right? 00:12:34.480 --> 00:12:35.679 And so I was excited. 00:12:35.919 --> 00:12:37.200 I felt like I just won the Super Bowl. 00:12:37.279 --> 00:12:38.240 You know, I felt like I was rocky. 00:12:38.320 --> 00:12:42.320 Yeah, you know, I mean, I was really excited. 00:12:42.480 --> 00:12:46.240 And and uh, and as a matter of fact, I thought, man, I'm on a roll a couple months later. 00:12:46.320 --> 00:12:47.759 I asked her again, and I was still a 10. 00:12:47.840 --> 00:12:50.559 So I'm like, yeah, but this is God, God's good. 00:12:50.799 --> 00:12:56.559 So here's what you're probably wondering: how you get to a 10 in your relationship, in your marriage. 00:12:56.879 --> 00:12:58.159 God has a way. 00:12:58.480 --> 00:13:02.320 God always has a way, and I'm always looking for God's way. 00:13:02.559 --> 00:13:05.039 So here's how it started for me many years ago. 00:13:05.200 --> 00:13:19.039 I was on a sabbatical, and every uh every year I take three sabbaticals that range from three days to seven days, and I was on a sabbatical with the Lord, and at this particular sabbatical, I felt like I was supposed to uh stay at the house. 00:13:19.200 --> 00:13:22.799 Now I almost always go somewhere else, but I felt like the Lord said stay at the house this year. 00:13:22.879 --> 00:13:25.440 So a million of the girls went somewhere else, and uh. 00:13:28.320 --> 00:13:30.559 we've got a lot of things that I'm asking questions about. 00:13:30.639 --> 00:13:33.200 Usually when I go on a sabbatical, I just hang out with God, you know. 00:13:33.279 --> 00:13:35.519 Whatever he wants to do, whatever he wants to say, that's great. 00:13:35.840 --> 00:13:41.919 But I just had some things I was praying about and some issues that I wanted to hear from God, and I wasn't really hearing very much. 00:13:42.080 --> 00:13:43.120 It was very unusual. 00:13:43.200 --> 00:13:48.159 And so I get to the fifth night at 7 o'clock at night, and I just said, God, what's going on? 00:13:48.320 --> 00:13:49.360 What's going on, God? 00:13:49.519 --> 00:13:51.679 I mean, I'm not hard to hear anything. 00:13:51.759 --> 00:13:57.279 Melody's coming home the next day, and it's just like you're not answering my prayers, you're not really speaking to me very much. 00:13:57.519 --> 00:14:00.159 And uh and God quoted me a scripture. 00:14:00.480 --> 00:14:02.480 You know, God knows scripture, right? 00:14:03.039 --> 00:14:16.879 Yeah, 1 Peter 3:7, he said, Husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with a weaker vessel, since she's a woman, and grant her honor as a fellow heir to the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered. 00:14:17.279 --> 00:14:20.960 I remember the first time I read that scripture, and I didn't like it. 00:14:21.360 --> 00:14:27.679 Because here's what I thought it said Husbands, understand your wives, so that your prayers may not be hindered. 00:14:27.919 --> 00:14:28.960 And here's what I thought. 00:14:29.120 --> 00:14:30.960 Who can understand a woman? 00:14:31.279 --> 00:14:32.480 Right, guys? 00:14:33.120 --> 00:14:35.759 I'm not even sure women understand women. 00:14:36.240 --> 00:14:40.720 And so I so I just didn't like that scripture, but but God said, No, you here's what he said. 00:14:40.879 --> 00:14:45.600 You don't have to understand your wife, you just have to live with her in an understanding way. 00:14:45.840 --> 00:14:49.039 And I said, Well, God, how am I not living with Melody in an understanding way? 00:14:49.200 --> 00:14:50.480 He said, Well, just look around. 00:14:50.639 --> 00:14:51.840 He said, See that wall over there? 00:14:51.919 --> 00:14:53.679 You were supposed to paint it a couple months ago. 00:14:53.840 --> 00:14:57.679 See this door that squeaks every time, the hinges squeak every time you open it. 00:14:57.840 --> 00:15:00.559 He said, have you thought about the garage lately? 00:15:00.720 --> 00:15:01.200 You know? 00:15:01.360 --> 00:15:03.679 Uh and he just started pointing all these things out. 00:15:03.840 --> 00:15:05.440 And so I said, God, I'm so sorry. 00:15:05.519 --> 00:15:07.279 I want to live with her in an understanding way. 00:15:07.440 --> 00:15:08.960 So uh so here's what I did. 00:15:09.120 --> 00:15:15.600 Starting at 7 o'clock that night, I worked on the house all night long until 9 o'clock the next morning. 00:15:15.840 --> 00:15:19.039 I uh I painted walls, I painted doors and frames. 00:15:19.279 --> 00:15:22.240 Took me three or four hours to straighten the garage up, clean it up. 00:15:22.320 --> 00:15:26.080 Uh I'd bought Melody a steam cleaner, you know, to clean up spots in the carpet. 00:15:26.159 --> 00:15:28.080 I think that was for Valentine's Day. 00:15:30.480 --> 00:15:32.000 Not really, not really. 00:15:32.240 --> 00:15:40.000 Okay, so I bought Melody a steam cleaner, and so I got it out and started spot, you know, cleaning spots and things like that. 00:15:40.159 --> 00:15:43.919 I worked all night long, and then when it got light outside, I worked outside in the yard. 00:15:44.000 --> 00:15:45.759 And I finished about 9 o'clock. 00:15:45.919 --> 00:15:48.000 And I came inside and I said, Lord, am I done? 00:15:48.159 --> 00:15:49.440 And he said, Yeah, you're done. 00:15:49.600 --> 00:15:56.240 And in an hour to two hours, he answered every prayer that I had, answered every question, gave me direction and vision. 00:15:56.399 --> 00:15:57.200 And why? 00:15:57.360 --> 00:15:59.039 Because God's ways work. 00:15:59.200 --> 00:16:02.799 God wants us to live with our wives in an understanding way. 00:16:03.039 --> 00:16:06.000 So, how do you live with your wife in an understanding way? 00:16:06.159 --> 00:16:07.039 Well, here's what I did. 00:16:07.120 --> 00:16:08.879 I learned from the experts. 00:16:09.039 --> 00:16:13.039 The experts know how for you to live with your wife in an understanding way. 00:16:13.120 --> 00:16:17.440 They've written books, they've done CDs, they do seminars. 00:16:17.679 --> 00:16:20.720 We have a Thrive Conference coming up next week, a Thrive Marriage Conference. 00:16:20.879 --> 00:16:25.039 Melly and I have been to every conference, every marriage conference that Gateway Church has ever had. 00:16:25.200 --> 00:16:27.279 You have to learn from the experts. 00:16:27.759 --> 00:16:32.639 For example, guys, there are two theories about arguing with a woman. 00:16:32.879 --> 00:16:34.399 Neither one works. 00:16:35.039 --> 00:16:37.840 But how would you know that if you didn't ask the experts? 00:16:38.000 --> 00:16:41.039 And here's the thing: I did not know how to be married. 00:16:41.200 --> 00:16:44.720 When we got married, I had no clue how to be married. 00:16:44.879 --> 00:16:54.080 After about 10 years of marriage, Melly told me very graciously, you know, honey, the first year of our marriage was the worst year of my life. 00:16:54.399 --> 00:16:57.120 I said, that is so encouraging, honey. 00:16:58.720 --> 00:17:00.559 But listen, did I give you hope? 00:17:00.720 --> 00:17:05.119 No matter where you are, no matter where you are in your marriage, you can be a 10. 00:17:05.279 --> 00:17:06.559 You can be a 10 in your marriage. 00:17:06.640 --> 00:17:08.240 Listen, God has a way. 00:17:08.480 --> 00:17:13.680 And so here's how to get to a ten in any area where you want to find God's way. 00:17:13.920 --> 00:17:15.519 Number one, read the word. 00:17:16.000 --> 00:17:16.720 Read the word. 00:17:17.119 --> 00:17:20.240 The Bible has an answer for every question you'll ever ask. 00:17:20.720 --> 00:17:24.640 The word of God is living and powerful, sharper than any two-edged sword. 00:17:24.720 --> 00:17:27.519 So read the word and find God's ways. 00:17:27.680 --> 00:17:30.640 Number two, as I said, learn from the experts. 00:17:31.200 --> 00:17:34.640 Number three, get wise counsel. 00:17:34.960 --> 00:17:38.079 And let me emphasize wise counsel? 00:17:38.240 --> 00:17:41.200 The Bible doesn't say get counsel, it says get wise counsel. 00:17:41.359 --> 00:17:45.759 He who walks with wise men will be wise, but a companion of fools is destroyed. 00:17:46.000 --> 00:17:48.400 Number four, prioritize. 00:17:49.119 --> 00:17:55.039 God's number one, Melody's number two, Kristen and Cassia, now Gabe are number three. 00:17:55.119 --> 00:17:56.720 And that's how I live my life. 00:17:56.880 --> 00:17:59.359 I live my life with priorities. 00:17:59.599 --> 00:18:03.200 I had a guy ask me one time, Steve, do you know why you've been so blessed? 00:18:03.440 --> 00:18:08.799 And I said, Well, you know, I love God, I try and follow God, do things his way, but what are you talking about? 00:18:09.039 --> 00:18:15.759 And he said, I think you've been blessed because you've been ruthless about cutting things out of your life that don't matter. 00:18:16.240 --> 00:18:18.720 You've cut things out and you've kept your priorities. 00:18:18.960 --> 00:18:21.759 We have to prioritize and live our life that way. 00:18:21.920 --> 00:18:24.559 And number five, hear God. 00:18:25.200 --> 00:18:26.000 Ask God. 00:18:26.160 --> 00:18:27.759 He is the one who has all the answers. 00:18:27.920 --> 00:18:30.480 He wrote the Bible, he has all the answers. 00:18:30.640 --> 00:18:33.519 And the way you hear God is you spend time with God. 00:18:33.759 --> 00:18:35.359 You spend time with God. 00:18:35.599 --> 00:18:39.440 I've been on 57 sabbaticals in 19 years. 00:18:39.680 --> 00:18:40.160 57. 00:18:40.400 --> 00:18:42.160 I've never missed a sabbatical. 00:18:42.960 --> 00:18:46.079 If you want to hear God, you have to spend time with God. 00:18:46.240 --> 00:18:51.359 Which leads me into my third point that God's ways lead to God. 00:18:52.000 --> 00:18:53.599 God's ways lead to God. 00:18:53.839 --> 00:18:55.519 Our ways don't work. 00:18:55.759 --> 00:18:59.920 God's ways work, and our ways lead to God. 00:19:00.160 --> 00:19:05.599 See, doing things God's way produces blessings, but the real blessing is knowing God. 00:19:05.839 --> 00:19:09.599 Listen to Moses' prayer in Exodus 33, 13. 00:19:10.079 --> 00:19:23.119 Now therefore I pray, if I have found grace in your sight, show me now your way that I may know you, and that I may find grace in your sight. 00:19:23.279 --> 00:19:24.559 This is what Moses prayed. 00:19:24.720 --> 00:19:28.400 He said, God, show me your way that I may know you. 00:19:28.640 --> 00:19:33.599 See, God's ways are designed to lead us to a relationship with God and make us more like him. 00:19:34.160 --> 00:19:38.400 See, Moses met with God face to face, and God showed him his ways. 00:19:38.559 --> 00:19:46.960 In Psalm 103.7, it says, He made known his ways to Moses, his acts to the children of Israel. 00:19:47.359 --> 00:19:51.759 And God showed him his ways because Moses passionately pursued God. 00:19:51.920 --> 00:19:53.440 I mean, he met with him day and night. 00:19:53.599 --> 00:19:55.359 He met with him 40 days on the mountain. 00:19:55.599 --> 00:20:00.000 God made known his ways to Moses so that Moses might know God. 00:20:00.559 --> 00:20:05.359 So God's ways are designed to bless you, to lead you, and to change us to be more like him. 00:20:05.599 --> 00:20:07.680 And God's ways work. 00:20:10.640 --> 00:20:19.359 If God wants to change what you're doing or how you're doing something, one of his ways is to apply or allow pressure. 00:20:19.599 --> 00:20:25.039 If he wants to change what you're doing or how you're doing it, one of his ways is to apply or allow pressure. 00:20:25.200 --> 00:20:30.160 And many times we think it's the devil, there's circumstances when it's really God applying pressure in our lives. 00:20:30.480 --> 00:20:37.519 James 1, 2 says, consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. 00:20:37.599 --> 00:20:39.680 And let endurance have its perfect result. 00:20:40.000 --> 00:20:43.519 That you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. 00:20:43.759 --> 00:20:46.559 See, God wants us to be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. 00:20:46.640 --> 00:20:47.440 So how does he do it? 00:20:47.599 --> 00:20:50.079 He brings us trials to test our faith. 00:20:50.319 --> 00:20:53.680 And here's what happens in these trials: God tells us what to do. 00:20:53.839 --> 00:20:59.680 And then if we'll believe God, God will show up, he'll do what he says he'll do, and then we'll have more faith in God. 00:20:59.759 --> 00:21:06.480 And the more faith we get, the more the more we endure, the more we become perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. 00:21:06.640 --> 00:21:13.440 So God is wanting to build our faith or move us in a different direction when he allows trials or puts pressure in our lives. 00:21:14.319 --> 00:21:20.480 About a year ago in late May or early June, I started getting all this pressure in my life. 00:21:20.720 --> 00:21:22.160 I mean, just pressure in my life. 00:21:22.240 --> 00:21:25.759 I didn't cause it, I wasn't in sin, and there really wasn't much I could do about it. 00:21:25.920 --> 00:21:30.640 But it's all this pressure, and I'm and I'm saying, God, why is there so much pressure in my life? 00:21:30.960 --> 00:21:33.039 I mean, there was like seven or eight major things. 00:21:33.119 --> 00:21:37.200 And you know, sometimes there's a couple things, or maybe three things in your life, but I mean seven or eight. 00:21:37.359 --> 00:21:39.440 And I just, God, why is there so much pressure? 00:21:39.599 --> 00:21:44.559 And then this couple came over to our house for supper, and I was telling about all this pressure in my life. 00:21:44.799 --> 00:21:48.319 And he said, uh, man, I've got a lot of pressure in my life too. 00:21:48.559 --> 00:21:53.279 And so uh we're talking about it, and I said, and I remembered something that Hudson Taylor said. 00:21:53.519 --> 00:21:59.839 Hudson Taylor said, Listen, it doesn't matter how much pressure there is, what matters is where the pressure lies. 00:22:00.960 --> 00:22:07.519 And if the more pressure there is, if it lies in the right place, it presses you closer to Jesus. 00:22:07.759 --> 00:22:11.680 So I shared that with this guy and I said, hey, let's pray for more pressure. 00:22:13.039 --> 00:22:14.480 Press us closer to Jesus. 00:22:14.640 --> 00:22:18.319 And I remember Melody said, honey, I'd really appreciate it if you would not pray that. 00:22:19.759 --> 00:22:21.680 I said, no, honey, this is going to be great. 00:22:21.839 --> 00:22:22.559 This is going to be great. 00:22:22.640 --> 00:22:22.960 More pressure. 00:22:23.119 --> 00:22:24.160 Get closer to Jesus. 00:22:24.319 --> 00:22:26.480 So we pray, God, more pressure. 00:22:26.880 --> 00:22:28.480 God answers prayer. 00:22:31.279 --> 00:22:37.519 On July 19th, 2009, I wrote in my journal 18 major pressures. 00:22:37.920 --> 00:22:38.480 18. 00:22:39.200 --> 00:22:40.240 I was not in sin. 00:22:40.319 --> 00:22:41.279 I didn't cause them. 00:22:41.759 --> 00:22:43.359 There wasn't really anything I could do about them. 00:22:43.519 --> 00:22:46.319 One of them was my dad was told he might have bladder cancer. 00:22:46.480 --> 00:22:47.759 That's pressure. 00:22:48.000 --> 00:22:52.000 We started having some foundation problems in our house that looked like they were going to be expensive. 00:22:52.240 --> 00:22:53.119 Pressure. 00:22:53.440 --> 00:22:57.839 And then we felt like God was telling us to sell our company, milestone construction. 00:22:58.000 --> 00:23:05.839 We started milestone construction in 1990, and last week was our 20th anniversary, and we felt like God was telling us to sell our company. 00:23:06.079 --> 00:23:08.160 And I didn't want to sell our company. 00:23:08.319 --> 00:23:09.680 We weren't under financial pressure. 00:23:09.839 --> 00:23:11.759 2008 was our best year ever. 00:23:12.000 --> 00:23:16.079 2009 was our fourth best year ever in 20 years, so that wasn't an issue. 00:23:16.160 --> 00:23:17.599 We were having a good year. 00:23:18.000 --> 00:23:21.599 But we just felt like God was kind of putting pressure on us to sell our company. 00:23:21.759 --> 00:23:28.319 I was working about 15 to 20 hours a week, doing ministry about 30 hours a week, and I was making a very, very large income. 00:23:28.480 --> 00:23:32.079 And I'm like, God, I, you know, God, we got a pretty good thing going on here. 00:23:32.160 --> 00:23:35.200 You know, I mean, why do you want me to sell our company? 00:23:35.279 --> 00:23:36.960 And but we felt like he was telling us that. 00:23:37.039 --> 00:23:41.839 So I went and met with a couple of business brokers, and I prayed about it, didn't feel like that was the way to go. 00:23:42.000 --> 00:23:52.720 I met with four or five Christian construction business owners, and three of them were very interested in buying our company, and we prayed about it, just didn't feel like that was what God wanted us to do, and so we didn't know what to do. 00:23:52.799 --> 00:23:54.799 So we just we just kept praying. 00:23:55.359 --> 00:23:57.599 And then one night I had a dream. 00:23:57.839 --> 00:23:59.519 I mean, I had a dream. 00:24:00.160 --> 00:24:01.200 And think about this. 00:24:01.359 --> 00:24:02.720 I had a dream as I read the scripture. 00:24:02.880 --> 00:24:10.960