Unapologetic Swingers: Episode 3 - What Happened After the Brazilians

What happened immediately after Lady had her first taste and the Tramp recovered from his temporarily mental paralysis. Join us as we talk about the elephant in the room that neither of us saw coming. Are we now swingers or are we still dirty vanillas? We'll let you be the judge!

Transcript

Lady: 0:05

Welcome back to unapologetic swingers. I'm

Tramp: 0:08

lady and I'm the tramp so today folks is episode 3 the aftermath where we cover our very unexpected play session with the Brazilian couple from episode 2

Lady: 0:24

I Think we're calling this what happened after the Brazilians

Tramp: 0:30

Well that's the line I have underneath it on the show notes there. But, yeah, it was, coming out of that whole experience, I think my worldview was shook. Of course, I had told you my fantasies some months prior, but to actually see it unfold in front of me was very... I don't know. It was just different. Well,

Lady: 0:59

I think I was trying to figure out how you did feel about that and I didn't know how to feel about it. I know I had fun. I had a blast. Just trying to navigate through that afterwards was very interesting.

Tramp: 1:17

So just to catch people up, Lady had a very how would you say, unexpected and rather delightful and public play session with a very sexy Brazilian couple, primarily Mrs. Brazilian as, we put her. And as that experience kind of wrapped up we. We went back to our room. Of course, this was at Desire, give or take almost two years ago at this point. And I think there was really kind of an elephant in the room, for lack of better terms. We really didn't talk about it. We were just kind of on autopilot. We were still incredibly buzzed from drinking all day and being out in the gorgeous sunshine. Yeah. And we kind of went about the normal evening routine where you go back, you get cleaned up and you get ready for dinner. And so we went to dinner, we caught up with some friends, had some laughs, but there was still kind of that ever present exactly as I said, elephant in the room.

Lady: 2:31

Yeah. That's like, how do you address that? When I guess something to that extent has never happened before. Right. Because there's, and I think we have grown to know this, there's so many different experiences that some we may have fantasized about. Mm hmm. And some that we have not either shared or either just Thought of that happens and you're just thinking, all right, how do we talk through this? Like this just happened?

Tramp: 3:10

And also there, there's the processing component. There's your kind of like, oh shit, that really happened. It was hot. It was, it was a huge turn on that is without a doubt, but we went about our evening routine. We went to dinner. We then got ready for the club afterwards. I don't even recall what the theme night was that night.

Lady: 3:39

I have no clue. And that was just shy of two years ago. Right?

Tramp: 3:45

So the the earlier events in the day had such a big impact that the rest of the day was just a blur?

Lady: 3:50

Oh my gosh yeah and I think honestly I was thinking are we gonna see them again? Mm hmm. Are we going to interact again? What does that look like? Is that something that you want? Is that something that I want? And I think all these things were going through my mind. That I don't remember half of the stuff that happened that night.

Tramp: 4:16

The thoughts honestly were, spinning through my head as well. I was in a constant state of arousal. I will admit all through dinner, all through the night because I was, I was having flashbacks. I was essentially, reliving those moments that I had witnessed firsthand just a couple hours earlier. But yet we still didn't talk about it. We still didn't address it. And I don't know if that's a failing on my part where I should have pulled you aside and been like, Okay, babe, we need to walk through this. Or if I did the right thing and just kind of let it cook.

Lady: 4:57

Who knows? I mean, it came together quite well. So Oh, I agree. I think it was okay. But yeah, we probably should have sat in, I think in this moment, I'm not sure if we had talked about, because I know there was one point where you said, babe, we need to reconnect and we need to talk about, all right, what was good. You know, what were you happy about during the day and what didn't you like? And I can't remember what you called that.

Tramp: 5:35

I guess it was really almost like a reflection on the previous day. That's something we'd done almost every day as we went to desire again and again and again. Right. You know, a recap, a reflection, but we'd always do it over breakfast the next day. Right. Where it was kind of, kind of our routine,

Lady: 5:56

right? And we always had the recap. We always said, we're going to sit down and talk about how did you feel about the day? Like, again, what did you like? What did you not like? What can we have done better or differently? Would you do that again? Just all those questions that we asked ourselves and. I think it helped because then we could say, I really liked that, like, that was really fun. And then we would try and, I don't know if you can recreate any of those moments, but you can always be like, yeah, that was great. Like, let's try and do that again.

Tramp: 6:39

And, it's funny that you say that because even to this day, anytime we. have a play session or, just an awesome night or sometimes not such an awesome night. We still do that the next morning always. And I think it really helps and it's really helped to strengthen us.

Lady: 7:00

Yeah. That goes back to the communication piece. Absolutely.

Tramp: 7:05

And so the night went on, and I'm sorry folks if we got away from the topic there a little bit, but the night went on and it was just kind of a normal evening. I don't know if you recall, but we were slated to meet with them later on.

Lady: 7:20

Well, I thought we were supposed to meet up for dinner, and they didn't

Tramp: 7:24

show up. Apparently Mrs. Brazilian had a little bit too much to drink that day, which could have explained a little bit of her Interaction with me. Interaction. Well, maybe how forward she was. True. I think that was probably her true nature. Yeah. But she had an early bedtime that night, from what I understand.

Lady: 7:47

I remember, yes. We got all dressed up and Super excited to go out and we're like, okay, we're going to meet up with them and have dinner and dance the night away. Yeah, they didn't, they didn't show up. No, they

Tramp: 8:04

didn't. So we had our evening and we head on back to our room and there's still just something eating at me. It was just lust. It was excitement. And we were both just dead tired. But I just, I had to reconnect with you. I just had to have you. And I believe I just threw you on the bed and just spread your legs wide and I just had to taste you. And I caught myself, at least in my mind thinking, I wonder if this was what Mrs. Brazilian tasted or how she liked it because I know I love it. Does that make sense? Yeah, it does. But it was one of those sessions that was just hot and lustful. And realistically, I just had to reclaim you. That's the easiest way to put it.

Lady: 9:12

Yeah, that was pretty hot.

Tramp: 9:16

It was because I had all these images fresh in my mind and that fueled me. And that night I don't even recall falling asleep.

Lady: 9:27

Did we have late night pizza afterwards?

Tramp: 9:32

No. No, we went to bed. We passed out in bed.

Lady: 9:36

Oh, we

Tramp: 9:36

were that tired. Well, it was an eventful day.

Lady: 9:41

Yeah, it definitely was.

Tramp: 9:44

And it wasn't until the next morning that we had a chance to talk and review and really reflect on everything that had happened the day prior. Well, when

Lady: 9:59

you're finally getting to sleep at like, what, 2, 3 in the morning. Probably. And the butler comes and knocks at your door at 7. 30 in the morning because you asked for coffee. You kind of have no choice but to get up and talk.

Tramp: 10:19

Well, the scent of coffee will pull even the deepest sleeper out of their slumber, I think. At least with us, it will.

Lady: 10:27

Yeah, so I think I have this sort of, I don't know if it's an issue, or I just like to wake up in the morning and have coffee and I would want to just go out and see the sunrise and listen to the water and I thought it was a great idea. Like, oh, somebody can bring me coffee at 730 in the morning. But it wasn't a really good idea when you don't get to bed until three in the morning. Maybe four in the morning.

Tramp: 11:05

Yeah. I think the mileage may vary based on the

Lady: 11:07

evening. I think so.

Tramp: 11:09

But, we did finally over coffee and minds a little clearer, the alcohol had kind of worked its way out. We really had that deep discussion about what happened with the Brazilians. And how we felt about it. Yeah. But then we started to, I think it wasn't until that point where our communication truly opened up. I know from my side, I felt like I could talk to you about things, fantasies, etc. without fear. Do you think it

Lady: 11:51

was because... You saw a different side of me and I was a little bit more open.

Tramp: 12:01

I think that was part of it.

Lady: 12:03

Cause I think a lot of men are worried or scared. And we've had this conversation before where you're not sure how to express. The fantasies or the wants or the desires, even if it is just a fantasy,

Tramp: 12:23

the fear is our better halves rejecting that. I think that is the fear, right? To have that look and to just have you say, ew, no. Why would you think like that? Exactly. Just flat out rejection. I think that's what most men fear, right? Whereas the opposite most likely is not true. Why do you think that is?

Lady: 12:51

I don't know, I could be wrong, but I think most men have a lot of those fantasies and desires. And I think it takes a lot for a woman to be comfortable and within herself to say, yeah, that sounds hot, like I could do that. I think it's very difficult to get to that point. And for some women, it's. It's definitely not. I think some women are just like, yeah, let's, let's go. Let's

Tramp: 13:34

do it. Yeah. They're wired that way. That's kind of their

Lady: 13:37

natural, right? And they're the ones that are like, Hey, this is my fantasy. I want to do this. What do you think? And the men are probably like, yeah, let's go.

Tramp: 13:49

We've come across, I think only a handful of women that are. are like that in the lifestyle that are almost hyper sexual. Yes. Very forward, very blunt. And almost willing to jump in any situation. I

Lady: 14:06

think the self confidence that they have is absolutely amazing. They have a lot of it. And I think a lot of women. Don't unfortunately,

Tramp: 14:22

I think that's a whole other deep dive. I know

Lady: 14:26

it is, we can go there next time. But yeah, having that self confidence. And I think that's so important,

Tramp: 14:37

you know, maybe to build on that. Maybe it was the confidence that I felt after witnessing you. That allowed me to open up that communication, if that makes sense. Right. Like, maybe you are a lot more receptive, but we both started after we kind of decompressed and felt like we were on an even playing field. Yeah. We were able to open up about fantasies, and just so you guys know, I am still trying to get Lady to admit some of her fantasies. She claims she doesn't have a lot of them. I will ask you about every three months or so, if you've come across anything new.

Lady: 15:27

Okay, but I asked you tonight, what was your new fantasy, and you're like, nope. So, no new ones. Let me just recap everything that I've told you before.

Tramp: 15:41

But you have something to work with, should you choose.

Lady: 15:45

Yeah, I have the same ones, though. Like, I've told you mine. Mind you, I'm like half naked here.

Tramp: 15:57

But you're all covered up, so I can only imagine what's underneath the duvet.

Lady: 16:04

You better use that imagination.

Tramp: 16:10

But to continue our conversation over coffee that morning really started to continue into additional fantasies and we both got really turned on. We did. And. Very similar to the night before, I just knew I had to have you, but you really beat me to the punch. I think we were stimulating each other with our fingers as we were sitting there talking. And as we talked through it, you just got wetter and wetter. Huh. I like that. And you were playing with me and I was just hard as a rock, but you took the initiative, which I appreciate, and you hopped up and just went down on me.

Lady: 17:04

Yeah, I have to take

Tramp: 17:05

care of you. And I love, I love it when you do. But it was also frantic. I would call this our true reconnection sex. We weren't still incredibly buzzed just like the night before. It was frantic, but not as frantic, I guess. If that makes sense, I realize it. No, it

Lady: 17:30

does. And, was this the first time, I mean, we didn't even do anything. We were still very vanilla.

Tramp: 17:40

So, previous, to this trip, if you would have asked me 24 hours earlier, I would have still called us Dirty Vanillas at

Lady: 17:46

that point. Okay, yeah, well, Dirty Vanilla, yes. Thank you for that clarification.

Tramp: 17:53

This was the first interaction with anybody else outside of the two of us. Yeah. Beyond, you know, just, just like, playful.

Lady: 18:09

I think people need to understand that everybody goes at their own pace too. Yes. So there might have been other couples that were like, I just want to dive to the deep end and go all in and experience everything there is to experience. There's others like us that are like, no, I just want to take it slow and let's figure this out what we want.

Tramp: 18:42

Yeah, the thing with the lifestyle is it will focus on any shortcomings or any weaknesses you have in the foundation of your relationship. And it will lay those weaknesses bare. I think based on like Reddit, for example, a lot of folks will come in there and ask, Hey, we have a dead bedroom. Will this help it? And the answer is always no.

Lady: 19:17

I, I don't think I would have tried this at all if there was a dead.

Tramp: 19:24

Right. It's not meant to replace a relationship sexual or otherwise, it's meant to add on. It's a bonus. It's a bonus.

Lady: 19:35

Yeah. All right. So sorry, I didn't mean to. I keep getting us off track. I feel like this whole

Tramp: 19:43

session. I think it's the wine. Mind

Lady: 19:45

you, I'm drinking wine for the first time in, I don't know how long. So, sorry.

Tramp: 19:53

So bear with us folks. We, we appreciate you guys so much. So we had this really incredible reconnection sex and. Just like always, I had to taste you and I wanted to work you over better than she did.

Lady: 20:14

Was that like a challenge to yourself, or what

Tramp: 20:18

was that? I think so. Yeah. I think in a lot of ways that's what reclamation is is to remind you that I am in position number one And that's what makes it like just kicks it up to the next notch and just makes it all the hotter Okay, but you didn't let me finish you off You said those magic words when, whenever you don't quite want to come yet, but you want more. Yeah. What are those

Lady: 20:48

babe? That I need you in me. Yes. Oh my

Tramp: 20:55

God. Now I did kick it up a little bit because I've, at the time we had a little purple friend. Huh. That was rechargeable, a little wand vibrator. Yeah,

Lady: 21:09

I remember that one. He's retired.

Tramp: 21:13

We'll, we'll fill you in on, on his replacement in a future episode. Yeah. But, I always let you drive in those situations because you know right where to put it. I can imagine where, but you know, the pinpoint of exactly the pressure, the speed, all that fun stuff. And I love watching you drive it. It's fun. But I handed that to you and you were just, you were on it. You, you needed to come and you needed to come hard. Yeah.

Lady: 21:52

I was so turned

Tramp: 21:53

on. Mm hmm. And I think you were coming and I think what finally pushed me over the edge there was, and you could probably sense it, where you commanded me, you were just like, come for me, come in your pussy. Yeah. And that was... That just flipped the switch and there was no way I was holding back anymore.

Lady: 22:22

Yeah, I know you try to last as long as you can.

Tramp: 22:25

Well, I always try to because I want to make sure that you're satisfied. I know.

Lady: 22:30

Yeah. Which I totally appreciate.

Tramp: 22:35

However, there are times when you just get a wild hair and you're like, I'm, I think my challenge today is to make you come as quickly as possible. Oh yeah, like today. Oh, that brings up something very important. What's that? From here on out, we cannot have sex until after we record. Why? Because then it will be next level. Okay. Imagine talking about all this for however long, you know, half hour ish. And then we're all ramped up and then it's like, okay, game on. Yeah. But

Lady: 23:11

there still has to be sessions in between.

Tramp: 23:18

So you're talking about you like the quantity. Yeah.

Lady: 23:25

Need more.

Tramp: 23:26

Need, always more, huh? Yeah. So that really wraps up the aftermath and...

Lady: 23:39

I think that... Hopefully the main takeaway from this is, we were able at the end of the day to communicate more than we were before. Yes. I agree. And you were able to really open up, you know, I, I think previously you had moments of. Telling me about some fantasies, which I'm sure was very difficult for you. But I think at this moment it was like, okay, you know, she's open to a little bit more. And I can probably be more open. And I think that just set the tone. Let's set the tone for everything that has happened after that. I

Tramp: 24:35

would agree with that. Yeah. And we've come a long way. Yes. Which will guide you through in future episodes here. And

Lady: 24:44

I don't know if you have this in here, but we are going to desire in 10 days,

Tramp: 24:53

11. Roundabouts, it will be the 16th of October, 2023. Yeah.

Lady: 25:01

And this is our 7th?

Tramp: 25:05

I want to say our 7th

Lady: 25:06

trip. Yeah. I'm so excited. I cannot wait.

Tramp: 25:10

So I know it's short notice, but if anybody's going to be there, feel free to just drop us an email and we'll make sure to say hi. Yeah. It'll be fun. Speaking of which... Despite my pleas or our pleas last episode, we did get a whole two emails.

Lady: 25:30

Is there only two people listening

Tramp: 25:32

to us? I know, based on the, on the statistics, there are a hell of a lot more, but, please guys, drop us a line. Just say hi. Critique us.

Lady: 25:44

I, I promise I'm not this much of a shitshow, but, yeah, the wine's been flowing. What? Why are you looking at me like that? You just edit that out.

Tramp: 26:00

Maybe.

Lady: 26:03

Fine. Just edit it

Tramp: 26:05

out. But anyway, our ask me anything segment this week is from a listener named Matt. And here's his question. How can an average couple that wants to have some excitement, but only take baby steps into the lifestyle? He goes on to say the normal reaction from the partner is often one of, is basically not very great, not positive. And how can he approach it in a non threatening manner? Very similar to the bundle of nerves that I was when I approached you. I can definitely appreciate where he's coming from. Yeah, that's,

Lady: 26:51

that's a tough one. I think if the reaction from the partner is not great, I think Baby Steps is probably the right approach. And what that looks like is probably going to be very different for everybody. True. You know, whether it's. Implementing a different fantasy, and that could be something that they do together,

Tramp: 27:25

right? I think you touched on something very important to that respect. I have two thoughts on this. One that would be, I guess you could say non threatening, is there's a website, it is a free sex survey. It's free. Called Mojo Upgrade and I'm sure there, there are others as well, but it really runs you through the gambit and each you and your partner take the quiz and it is basically, would you be open to this? Would you be open to you know, spanking? Would you be open to, public sex or watching other people have sex all the way through the more, advanced stuff. And it will report back after you take it on your own and your partner takes it on their own. It will report back only the things that you agree on. So really you can be blunt, you can be completely honest there and you have nothing to lose because If one of the partners says, yeah, that's not for me, it won't even show up on the final report. I remember we took this. We did. And I don't think the lifestyle even registered for either of us, maybe because there was a certain level of fear. Or who knows?

Lady: 28:51

Well, I mean, I think this was a couple months into our relationship, but But it definitely helped us to think outside the box and if we did have something where it was like, Oh, like we both agree on this, we could sit there and say, okay, and you want to, do you want to try this? And those are. I think instances that you would never talk about or try before, that really helped you to open up and then communicate maybe about more. So I agree with that. I would definitely, I would definitely try that.

Tramp: 29:38

And my second thought is. If you propose something that's even remotely adjacent to the lifestyle, it's all about framing. I could see if you were to come to me early on and say, Hey, babe I think I want to bang other dudes. That would not come off very positive. But if you are to frame it by saying, Hey, Hey, I want to take this adventure, this sexual adventure together and I would like to try maybe going to a nude beach. There are a couple of them around the country or I want to try going to a sex club and have it be something for both of you to try versus like, Oh, I want to try this or I want you to try this, right? That's my thought on being, I guess, non Threatening? Non threatening. Absolutely.

Lady: 30:39

It's not the what's in it for me mentality. Mm hmm. It's how can we spice this up, and how can I, I don't know if it's make you more happy, but more satisfied.

Tramp: 30:56

I think that's a good way to put it, but really in the end, it's all about communication, right?

Lady: 31:03

I think, one thing too, if you live in a city or a town where there is a lifestyle club, which we do, and I think we've met so many couples that were there for the first time, and I think just understanding and going, because you get to see how many great people there are, how many couples that are just so in love with each other and the friendships are just I think the friendships that we have with the lifestyle couples that we know far exceed anything I've ever

Tramp: 31:57

experienced. I think if I were to sum it up, it would be genuine, very, yeah. So guys, we're going to wrap up this episode and just as always, we love that you're coming with us on our journey here. And we again want to encourage you guys to reach out to us at unapologetic swingers at gmail. com. Just drop us a line, say hi. Try not to be too mean.

Lady: 32:29

No one's been

Tramp: 32:30

mean. No one has

Lady: 32:31

been mean. Oh my gosh. I love seeing all the emails. So please keep them coming. Yes.

Tramp: 32:37

Indeed so guys, the next episode we're going to launch into newbie follies. Oh,

Lady: 32:46

what, what's that?

Tramp: 32:50

It's some of our, I guess, stumbles and very, now that we can look back on it, very funny and sometimes not so funny instances of when we were, brand new. Into the lifestyle. We still have them. Oh, we still do. But some of these were pretty bad, pretty bad.

Lady: 33:17

Oh my gosh. We have some great stories. All right. Well, until next time I'm lady and I'm the tramp. Be sexy, be confident, be unapologetic.