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Welcome to Postpartum Better, the go -to podcast for expecting a new mom's navigating life after birth. Hi, I'm Chelsea Barbine, wife, mama, yogi, postpartum health coach, and your new mama friend. Together, we're covering topics like postpartum recovery, maintaining your mental and physical health, finding your identity as a new mom, and rekindling your relationships. Get ready for expert tips

actionable advice and heartfelt conversations with other moms who just get it. The health and happiness of the world resides in us mamas. It's time to postpartum better.

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Alright, before we dive in today, I am going to ask a question that I

full well know is going to sound extremely sarcastic. But I promise you that there is a point to it. I want to know. So this question, I'm literally asking this of all of the mamas out there, whether you are expecting and you're in those final prep days, just awaiting your little one, whether it's your first or your fourth, it doesn't matter.

Or even if you are in those early newborn days, you're just soaking up the snuggles with, let's be real, like everything happening in the background. It kind of feels like a blur, but you just know like, okay.

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Or you are in that season transitioning back into work, right? Little one is still little, very much so. Maybe they're three months. Maybe they're six months. Maybe you're approaching that year, like that big, that big milestone for both you and baby, like your first year as a mama. It's big for them, yes. And like, I really hope that you're taking a moment to celebrate yourself.

or

Let's say you are like me and the thick of toddlerhood. I want to know, is it just me or do you two feel like your to -do list is never ending? You guys, never ending, even as Frankie is getting more independent. The list.

It's like it's ever growing. And to top it off, we have the fall equinox, right? Like literally happening. And the hours in the day seemingly just continue to shrink. Like the list is getting longer, but the hours in the day are fewer. And I say that like, caveat, guys, I know

We all have the same 24 hours in a day. doesn't matter what season it is. But with the shift, with the sun rising later and setting earlier, it's just like, and then again, the list just keeps getting longer. my gosh. And now we're adding another one to the mix. And I'm like looking at Colin like on a nightly basis, like what the fuck is happening? Mind you, I know that it's the season and that's just the perspective, right? I'm holding space for that.

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and also holding this space for the sheer and true overwhelm of it all, not just as a mom, but as a wife, as an entrepreneur. I'm in a full -blown coaching cohort right now. We've got bonus workshops coming out the wazoo for fall. And this is my first maternity leave that I'm preparing for.

as a business owner, as my own boss. And it's just like, take a deep breath, Chelsea.

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And I'm saying all this and I'm like, I know that while these experiences, like my bio -individual situation, my unique circumstances are for me alone, not everyone is dealing with all of this exactly, but I do believe as a collective, it is so natural this time of year to feel this chaotic energy and just truthfully, especially as moms, want to this desire to reclaim

our time and focus. Right? Like, I could not be alone in this. In fact, I'm saying that and like, I know that I'm not alone in this. This continues to come up. It doesn't matter what cohort it is. Truthfully, week after week with mamas that I'm coaching and the Cultivate crew, it comes up all the time.

And I will say with all of that being said and this being so prevalent in my own life, especially you guys, especially as I share with you with the change in Frankie's child hair, child hair. my God. Her hair is getting longer as it's really cute. She's got little curls and it's like kind of flipping out. It reminds me so much of my younger sister Val's hair. It's, my God, she's got a great head. I digress. The whole point is...

I'm feeling this significantly increase of my own life, especially with this transition of Frankie's childcare. And as everyone knows, this was very much a choice that we made, Collin and I made, consciously together. We talked about it. It happened very quickly, but this was very much, I believe we manifested this for our family. And with that, while it is a much better situation across the board,

There also has been shifts that have come with it. And for lack of better words, I have lost a few hours of daytime for work. So here I am, you know, feeling like I'm kind of, I feel right now, and I feel like we can all kind of relate to this in different seasons. Like feel like I'm maxing out, right? But, and with that, working to reframe it to help

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support myself mentally and emotionally and physically, let's be real, we got a little human growing in here, digging into my own toolbox, just as I do to help clients to like truthfully help me navigate this season with more focus and prioritization. And in today's episode, I'm gonna share with you how I

have been coaching mamas and the Cultivate crew on this, but then also to like coaching myself in effort to manage all of the things happening without guys losing my mind. And the biggest tip that I'm gonna like start off with, and I want to just truly again acknowledge that we are all bio individuals. So I know that.

your situation is not exactly like mine, just as if it's not exactly like, you know, your sister's or your best friend's or your cousin's or your co -workers. And that's okay. Like there's beauty in that. Truthfully take what works for you and leave what doesn't, you know? So we're going to go over like a big strategy that I've been coming back to. It's actually one that I learned when I was studying with the Institute for Integrative Nutrition.

And then I'm going to share with you a couple of things that like kind of come up that may feel as though like barriers or challenges, sticky spots, whatever to this practice. Because let's be real, a lot of practices like they sound great in theory, but like when it comes to actually putting them into practice, like into action, we have, you know, we have our own narrative happening in our minds. We're going to dive into that today. But before we do that, you know, with this topic on fall,

I would love to just invite everyone, if you're listening to this live, and I say live, like when it comes out, within a few days of it coming out, I would love to see you guys at the Nourish with Ayurveda Fall Into Seasonal Balance event, live with me and my dear mom, my friend Sherry Vitale. Sherry has been on the podcast, both as a guest and just

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in mention of, know, mamas who have been there to support me in my own postpartum journey. She is truly one of the moms that I go to and I look up to. She is a wealth of knowledge, both, truthfully, like professionally and personally. We are going to be hosting a workshop together on Thursday, September 26th at 7 p Eastern Standard Time.

all about understanding fall as a season in

honoring of the Ayurvedic practice, which would compare fall to Vata energy, which is known for its light and airy and sometimes, as you're hearing me describe this chaotic energy. Rest assured if you're feeling this, again, you're not alone. And what I found so interesting in speaking with Sheri is this transition

you know, the seasonal transition, it's very much like the energy that many of us experience after birth and even during our menstrual cycles. High vata energy can leave us feeling depleted, especially if we're not taking the steps to nourish and support ourselves. So I'm super excited to be partnering with her. We're going to go over an overview of Ayurveda, the elements and the doshas, and then we're going to cover some fall, like seasonal foods and lifestyle practices that you can implement.

to nourish yourself both on and off the plate. I'm also gonna be giving out my Quarkare Cultivate cheat sheet, which is like my go -to for honestly like reflection in supporting your ongoing personal growth. So if you can make it live, I highly recommend, but know that if you aren't able to join us live, you can still grab your seat. Both the recording and all of the materials provided will be available within 24 hours after the live event.

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like lifetime access. So you're not going to lose it. You can come back to it if you need that revisit, you know, whether it is in this fall season or when you are in those early postpartum months or even when you get your first menstruation after, you know, having baby or goodness, like even next year, it's never too early you guys to start planning. I swear.

I will be sure to include the link in the show notes for that event itself. But again, it is called Nourish with Ayurveda, Fall Into Seasonal Balance. All right, so let's really dive into like, I don't know why I want to say this, but like the meat and the potatoes of this episode. As I've shared, know, there's a lot going on over here in the Barbian household, but like literally in this mama brain of mine.

And I've been finding myself tapping back into one of the practices that I learned while I was studying to become an integrative nutrition health coach with the Institute for Integrative Nutrition. And while there are so many that I use on like a day -to -day basis, even week -to -week, month -to -month, et cetera, the one that I want to dive into today is called Big Rocks. For those of you who aren't familiar with Big Rocks, the essence is that we can very easily feel overwhelmed.

with all of the things happening on our plates, right? Like again, mom, wife, entrepreneur or coworker, sister, friend, daughter, these are in like no particular order, you guys, like literally just coming to my brain as they come. But you get the point, it's a lot, right? And on a day -to -day basis, when we look at our to -do list or all of the things that need to happen in a day or in a week, in a month, it's so overwhelming, right?

And this idea of big rocks is a practice where every day, ideally, right, I'm going to suggest every day, we schedule a meeting with ourselves. I know those of you who are like in corporate are like, Chelsea, do you know what my calendar looks like? And I'm going to tell you, my calendar doesn't look like that. So I could not say I sympathize, but I do empathize because my husband is in corporate and I know what his calendar looks like. Okay.

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And I have been in corporate myself, you know, like I've been there. I get it. It is a lot. And I'm going to argue that the most important meeting that happens is the meeting that you have with yourself every single day. It should be a non -negotiable no matter what that meeting looks like. Me ting, right? What that meeting looks like.

And when you sit down or you're standing up and you're getting all the things together, during this meeting with yourself, I invite you to select three things that absolutely need to happen that day.

Just three things. And I know some of you listening, because again, been there, I'm coaching myself through this. There is such resistance when it comes to only selecting three things. Totally get it. There's so much more that needs to happen, right? I promise we will get there. For this purpose, for this practice, think of three things, your top priorities that need to be accomplished, right? Write them down, whether it's in your notes,

app of your phone, whether it's on a piece of paper, sticky note at your desk, whatever. It doesn't matter how you doodle it, wherever you put it, but I want you to write them down. And I want those to be the three things that you work to accomplish right away in the day. The purpose of this is to help bring focus to what in life matters most for you. Now in this situation, again,

We are wearing so many hats and I know that it is a lot. There are so many things that mean a lot to us. And, and, and, and for our own mental and emotional and physical, I would argue, well -being.

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It is so helpful to be crystal clear on our greatest values, because without that, it is so easy to get lost in the chaos and the overwhelm of purely practicing whack -a -mole 24 -7. We talk about the maternal mental load.

and what I was sharing with a mom, a friend of mine who's also a business owner. And then we have all of the business owner tabs too. It can cause insanity, right? So my invitation for each of us to bring a sense of ease, to bring a sense of focus, to honor and practice prioritization in day to day is every day as simple as this.

Practice big rocks. Choose three things that need to happen that day.

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and get those done first.

And I guarantee you, while there is so many other things that need to happen, we're going to dive into that in just a second. If you find yourself able to cross off those three things,

the feelings of pure victory, of accomplishment, achievement, success, whatever you tie to, crossing things off that list with that feeling, that high vibration will propel you forward in whatever capacity that you desire. Whether that propelling forward is to do more, to be more, to feel more, but it will truthfully take that shift, but it will truly take what

may be identified as more negative feelings, right? That overwhelm the stress, the anxiety, the worry, the fear, the insert, whatever feeling it is that comes up for you when you look at your to -do list pre -Big Rocks practice. I can almost guarantee you that there will be relief and a sense of like a shift in positive energy.

when we only focus on those three things. And that's not to say that like other things can't get done. No, no, no, no. Like when you get those three things done, you're like, let's be real. Like as my mother -in would be like, like we're on top of the world. She's gonna kill me when she hears that. But like, I love you, Lori. It's usually like that is our celebration, right? Like that is, it's just like, it feels good. And then we wanna keep going. We wanna do more, right?

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But I want to remind you that just because you feel like you can do more doesn't mean that you necessarily have to do more. In fact, I would argue that when we are looking at that full list or we're thinking what would be like a bonus to get done beyond our big three and we're thinking of all the other things, like whether it's like household tasks or child care duties or what have you, right?

scheduling of like doctor appointments or play dates or whatever. I want you to think which of these extra things outside of the big three

Perhaps could you delegate to another day or to another person? Ooh, if that triggered you, lean in even more because this is meant for you. And I say that as a Leo, as in Enneagram 3, as the oldest of children, you guys know, you know.

It can be so challenging for me to delegate and to ask for help or to push something off.

And I will tell you, the more that I have practiced, just this.

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the more feelings of peace and ease I have carried with me throughout the day, and the better that I'm able to show up for myself and for everyone else, both from a being and a doing capacity. And the more that I ask for help, the more that I actually can get done. It's this weird thing. I'm telling you, it's like as soon as we accept or we release things that are

not energetically supportive for us, whether it's things that are just, you know, let's be real, like things that we don't love doing. The energy that we have and we can put into the things that we love and the other things that we have on our plate, just it skyrockets. So when it comes to delegating to different days or to different people, there's a couple of things I would invite you to check in with. I really would kind of think about it in the lens of what we practice in the Cultivate crew.

with the core care cultivate methodology. There are foundational pillars in caring for ourselves so then we can ultimately care for others that truly build upon each other. And there are things that we have to do for ourselves. And then there are also things that others can do to support us in doing things for ourselves. So I would invite you to take a look at that, of what are things that are perhaps not a human fundamental requirement?

for like living, thriving in life, right? That could be one way to look at what can you delegate to a later day. And then also too, like what are things that you really do not have to do for yourself that you can delegate to someone else? And this doesn't have to necessarily be your partner. I mean, you guys have heard me talk a lot about Colin and how much he and I share a lot of the responsibilities at home and with Frankie.

God bless him, I'm so appreciative. And I want you to hold space for the fact that I know that not everyone's situation is exactly like mine. Again, your situation is not gonna be like your neighbors, like your sisters, like your best friends, like your coworkers, it's not. Like we're bio individual. However, I do believe that we all have, especially as mothers, we have the ability to get very creative in our resources. And I will invite you to think about

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If a partner is not a resource stream for you in delegating, who else in your life is? Getting even more creative with that. It doesn't necessarily need to be family, right, or friends or your neighbors. I'm a huge proponent for hiring out support as needed. Again, being mindful of resources. And while resources tend to be a focus or a thought on financial resources,

And we'd also really consider the time, right? Time is money, mamas, truthfully. And by delegating certain responsibilities, even something as silly as laundry, I do have a girlfriend who has a laundry service that literally comes, I don't know how many times a week, but I see them drive through my neighborhood all the time, to do her laundry for her and her family, okay? That right there frees up time for you to focus on other areas that are truly matter to you.

And sometimes there is a sense of like conflict or friction when it comes to really identifying what are your main priorities. This is where I will say those of you who are in this community and whether you're a nested and nourished mama or you're a cultivate crew mama, utilize that Rebirth Reflections Journal. The journal itself, for those of you who haven't seen it or have access to it, one you highly recommend, it's amazing. Second,

It includes a space for us to really, I'll say process our birth story, our birth experience, following a special like a journaling methodology that was studied by Dr. Pennybacker, my God, like way back, I remember learning about it on the Andrew Huberman podcast. But anyways, there's that section and then the whole second half is...

the really like the channeling of the rebirth of the mom. And it's a space with several prompts for us to reflect on in that earlier phase of postpartum to really help us connect with our values, our wants, our needs, our desires, our beliefs, and our vision for motherhood. So when we find ourselves in moments like this or feeling

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disconnected or chaotic or whatever the word is that we want to use, when we tune into the other tools such as the Cultivate Check -in or the Cultivate Cheat Sheet, it's a little bit more clear on, again, what feels in most alignment for us to be able to understand what is in conflict and what is actually challenging us from this time allocation perspective, which I do believe comes down to this overarching

Truthfully, this is the number one problem with moms is the overwhelm that comes with motherhood. So I highly, highly, highly recommend if you have access to the Rebirth Reflections Journal, dive into that. If possible, before you can really begin the big rocks practice, but know that you don't have to have the Rebirth Reflections Journal to necessarily like practice this and start implementing on a day -to -day reminder practice.

I don't want to say it makes perfect, it just, with practice, is ease in it, right? For a lot of you listening and you're like, my God, but like, how can I do this? I mean, really, it's, again, it's carving out that meaning for yourself of what is a priority in my life? You know, what do I see for myself as a mom? And acknowledging that this check -in is so important.

with ourselves not only as we like transition into the postpartum period with, you know, our little one, but it's so important to continue to check in with ourselves as we evolve as moms, like as our children are evolving as their needs and our needs and our role of mother is evolving alongside of them and their growth. I think a big thing that comes up for a lot of moms and it is one of the hardest things to list.

as a big rock is the self -care aspect. And I talked a little bit about self -care and like almost the toxic culture that we're finding ourselves in with like luxury self -care and like what that looks like. And I know the mom guilt that comes up when we are thinking about self -care, whether it is, you know, truthfully just holding the boundary for ourselves of having that solo time, whether it's at home, but like, especially when we step out of the house.

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And I'm here to remind you that.

Self -care isn't selfish. If anything, I look at it as a very selfless act. It is so incredibly necessary, especially when you're juggling so much. Like full transparency, you guys, when I am having a like, when I say, I'm like, I have go to my girlfriends, I'm like, how you doing? What's going on? I'm like, well, I lost my shit, you know, the other afternoon. Like I say that and it's like me acknowledging that like I lost myself the other afternoon.

Right? When I'm not taking care of myself, I don't have the capacity to hold the space and take care of my family members.

I think no matter what is going on for each and every one of us, it's just so important to be extra mindful, especially during these chaotic seasons, to double down on our self -care practices. Whether it's a five -minute meditation or going on a walk outside between meetings, taking a walking meeting, or strapping on your babe and taking them outside. my gosh, what a shift outdoors does for Frankie. I can speak to no end.

Maybe it's stepping away from your desk or just taking a moment. You put the baby down and you just say, you know, I'm going to go make myself a cup of tea. Like they might as a newborn, like they don't understand what we're saying, right? But like, truthfully, just taking a moment, even if it's putting them in their crib, they're going to be okay. That's the safest spot for them, right? Taking a moment and just enjoying a few sips of a hot beverage, just allowing these small moments to help you recharge is so crucial.

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And I will say while again, we all have bio -individual needs and the practice of, you know, big rocks and like finding ways to delegate either to a different day or to a different person, it's going to vary for each of us, right? I would highly, highly, highly encourage in these seasons of more chaotic energy, right? This Vata energy for us, whether you're in the early postpartum days, whether you're, you know, finding yourself menstruating,

or whether you are just with the collective navigating the shift into fall, holy moly, hang on, find a self -care practice that you can commit to daily. That could be, again, that check -in with yourself. Promise that to yourself. Make yourself a priority. Because at the end of the day, it's these practices, you guys, they seem so simple and truthfully like they are.

It's the consistency that goes into them that make the greatest change.

I hope this episode was helpful and just a little glimpse of how I as a coach, coach other mamas to prioritize during these very...

full seasons, I will say, how I coach myself during these, you know, mass transitions where I feel like, dear God, I'm just hanging on like every Shavasana and yoga, I'm like palms down for counting, like, yes, please. By just sharing with you like how you too can focus on your top priorities and ask for help and really carve out time for yourself by focusing on

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what is of greatest importance to you from not only a larger perspective, right, throughout your whole motherhood journey, and not even in the different milestones or seasons of motherhood, but truly from like a day -to -day, a week -to -week point of view with the Big Rocks practice. Remember, every journey is different.

But I truly do believe that by focusing on what truly matters for us, we can feel more grounded and less overwhelmed, who and what mama wouldn't want that for themselves and for their family that they are just loving on each and every day.

If you listen to this episode and you implement Big Rocks, I would love to know how it supports you. If you have any other suggestions of just how you prioritize your day and how you manage the quote unquote chaos, tell me. I love to hear. Tag me on social, DM me, send me an email with what's working for you, how this episode supported you.

If you were listening to this and you're like, my gosh, so -and -so needs to hear this episode. I was just talking with her. We literally had the same conversation. Literally, welcome to my life. Send this episode to them. Go on Apple Podcasts. Leave a review. Leave a rating. The more mamas that know and just feel supportive, I wholeheartedly believe is how we can rewrite the postpartum narrative for the collective.

If you're looking for more support, do not forget to check out the website on all the upcoming offerings. Sign up and join me and Sheri live on Thursday, September 26th for the Nourish with Ayurveda Fall Into Seasonal Balance Workshop or grab the recording. Like it's never, it's never, I'll say like never too late. Like it's not a missed opportunity not to able to join us live. Like the live is amazing. Yes, we've got the Q &A, you've got the community and just the vibe and all the excitement in the chat.

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and it's so much fun to come together with like -minded mamas. But, and the information is still, it's still the same, it's still there. Again, link to that workshop is gonna be in the show notes. And reminder that you are not alone. I'm truly cheering for you as we navigate this next season together.

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Thank you for joining me for this episode of Postpartum Better. If you're inspired by this conversation to help yourself or another mom navigate life after birth, take a minute to leave me a review on Apple Podcast, and then share this episode with someone who could use the virtual hub. The health and happiness of the world resides in us mamas, and I'm so proud to be doing Postpartum Better with you. Until next week, with care, Chelsea.