the Ugly Truth Saves Lives

15-19-23. To understand the significance behind these numbers, you have to listen to Joi West-Phalo’s personal parenting journey. She became a mom at 15 and now inspires other moms and women to walk boldly in their purpose. Through a strong support system and determination not to fall into the teen mom statistics, Joi was able to find herself again, define meaning in her life, and be a role model for many others to push through their ugly truths.

In this episode of The Ugly Truth Saves Lives, host Tamara Eldridge speaks with Joi West-Phalo—author, advocate, and founder of She Changes Everything.

Joi shares her raw and unfiltered journey through teen motherhood, marriage, divorce, and ultimately discovering her purpose in uplifting other women. This conversation highlights the importance of community, the healing power of storytelling, and how faith can guide you through even the most uncertain seasons of parenting.

This episode is a reminder that your truth—no matter how messy—can be the very thing that sets you and others free.

🎧 Tune in for a story that will challenge, inspire, and empower you to embrace every part of your journey.

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Let's be honest. Parenting will humble you quick, but it'll also grow you in ways you never expected. This is Nailed It Motherhood Podcast, the place where we unpack it all together. I am your host with The Most, Tamara Eldridge. This is your space where we unpack the real, the raw, and the ridiculous parts of raising kids together. Here we celebrate the wins, we learn from the bumps, and we laugh through everything in between because none of us know what we're doing. If you are in this season of personal growth, reflection, and pouring back into yourself, please make sure to check out the This Mama is nailing it self-care parenting journal, which was created for moms by moms to help you stay grounded, intentional, and whole along the way. Enough about the logistics. We are here to learn from an amazing guest and her story today. Our guest today started a full life very early, from being a teen mom at 15 to marrying at 19 with three kids and then divorced by 23. Joy West Falo wants to give hope and encouragement to moms to keep pushing. Listeners, let's get excited to hear from this woman of faith, purpose, and passion as we welcome the beautiful, the fierce, and the fabulous Joy West Falo. Hey, love, how are you?

SPEAKER_00 1:36

I am amazing. Oh, you just hyped me up. As I should have.

SPEAKER_02 1:42

Welcome to the show.

SPEAKER_00 1:44

Thank you so much for having me. I feel honored to be here. Oh my gosh. And it just it's something about every time I hear someone like 15, 19, 23, it puts me in a place, and I'm like, wow, that was me.

SPEAKER_01 1:59

That was you. That was you. And that is your story. And I'm so, so excited that you have that here for us to hear as Neled at Motherhood Podcast listeners. I mean, there's power in your story just because you got up. And we talked about this a little bit before we started recording. And I'm not going to steal your shine, but you got up and you're here today. So I'll leave it at that. And I'm going to slide on over to our usual episodic Tavi tale because we do want to come back and we want to spotlight your journey. But before we do that, I have to share our Tavi tale. So our Tavi Tale is an episodic tradition where I get to share about who my baby girl is. Tavia is my world, but she also is my stressor. Because she is my stressor, sometimes I have to find things that kind of make her tired and make her quiet and make her occupied. And one of those things is a beautiful song. Oh, such a beautiful song. And it is by Major, and it is, This is Why I Love You. No, it's Why I Love You. But the chorus goes, This is Why I Love You. This is one of my favorite songs, introduced to me by my boyfriend. But my baby girl loves this song too. She loves it, but she also hates it because it puts her to sleep, Joy. It puts her to sleep. It is such a soothing song. Do you know the song that I'm talking about? I do. I do. I'm singing it in my head. You do not remember. Oh my God. It's so beautiful. I love it. Every time I play it in the car, Tavia falls asleep, like almost immediately. And it took me a little bit to realize that there was a pattern that, you know, we would be driving and I would play the song. And then it was all of a sudden really quiet. And I look back in the rear view mirror and she's out, right? Then she started to realize that this song put her to sleep too. So she would fight every time that song came on. No, Mom, I don't want to hear this song. I don't want to hear this song, even though she really likes it. Like she knows the words. She sings it with her little heart whenever she is awake to hear it. But it puts her to sleep. So the other day, she was talking, talking, talking, and I just really needed a break. I'm not gonna lie. I just needed a break. And um, so I was putting my music on, and I said, I I really do need a break. And she just is whiny today. And so I put that song on. She said, Mom, no, I don't want to hear this song. I said, but I really do, Tavia. And she tried to fight me, and then we got into maybe the first run of the verse. This is why I love you. And I enjoyed the rest of my song. And I enjoyed the rest of my ride. And Homegirl was out until I hit park. So thank you, Major. And thank you, Joy, for listening to my Javi Tell. I love it. It's the little things. It is the little things. Okay, thank you. You made me feel better about myself because you know sometimes I'm like, should I feel bad about this that I intentionally put that song on just because I didn't feel like listening to it anymore?

SPEAKER_00 5:29

Absolutely not. Absolutely not. I mean, some people spray melatonin or give them melatonin gummies, and whatever you do for your peace and fantasy, that's what you have to do. Yours is in the form of a song, and she has sweet dreams, sweet dreams, beautiful loving dreams.

SPEAKER_01 5:48

Yes. Thank you for your encouragement. I appreciate it so much. Well, thank you again for listening to my Toby Tale. But we are not here for me today, and we are not here for my baby girl. Well, some listeners might be, but we are actually here for you. So before we get into your personal parenting journey and getting a chance to listen to your herstery segment, I want our listeners to hear a little bit of who you are, and I'm gonna read your bio so that we can get an introduction of who Joy is. And then I'm gonna fall away, give you the stage, and let you share your personal parenting journey so that we know from your mouth who you are. So, listeners, let's hear a little bit about Joy. Joy West Falo is an author, speaker, and advocate, empowering team moms and women. A mobile Alabama native now living in Charleston. She leads a marriage ministry with her husband and is the founder of She Changes Everything and co-host of the Hope at the End of the Tunnel podcast. Joy has written seven books, y'all. She was featured on the Jennifer Hudson Show and has been recognized as a distinguished author of Alabama and an inspiring woman of the Gulf Coast. Her faith-driven story continues to inspire others to walk boldly in their purpose. And listeners, I cannot wait to hear what she has to say. So, Joy, the floor is all yours. I'm so excited to hear what you have to say.

SPEAKER_00 7:34

Wow, thank you so much. And thank you, listeners, for tuning in to Nailed It. I am so excited to be a guest and to tell you a little bit about my story, to let you know that whatever stage you are in in life, wherever you are in life right now, whatever season you're in, all the things, that it's okay. You are not stuck if you feel stuck. It's okay. I'm gonna tell you a little bit about me. You're gonna say, oh my gosh, that that's her. She she was there, she's been there, and look at her now. So, um, as Miss Tamara mentioned, I was a mom at the age of 15. Yep, 15 years old. I had a baby boy, Jaden. And of course, you know, things happen. I never, first of all, I'm gonna be honest. Tamra, do you mind if I be honest? I gotta give it, I gotta give the viewers real honest um feedback. I never wanted kids. I never even wanted kids. And the kids, and I and and when I realized that I didn't want kids, I was like, oh, okay, well, maybe I'll have two, a girl and a boy. And you know, we plan our life out, um, and it don't go that way. You know, a lot of times our life never goes the way that we planned it, of course, but for whatever reason, I had this boy, um, little boy at the age of 15, and my mom was an elementary school counselor, and my dad was a preacher. So, yeah, I'm a PK kid. Believe what you want about PK kids. Okay, whatever. But so it happened to me, and and when it happened to me, I didn't want anyone to feel sorry for me. My main goal was to finish high school, go to college so that I could build a better life for me and my son. And that's exactly what happened. My mom actually, I actually asked my mom if I could have an abortion when I first found out. And she said, girl, no, we are going to support you. You are going to finish high school and whatever you have to do. So I'm just thankful that I had a support system. I'm thankful that my mom and even um his grandparents, they supported me in every way. It I mean, it was just amazing at how everyone um supported me. But to move on, I was 19 when I married. Yeah, 19 years old. It was one of those things where my mom was like, if you're finna move, if you're gonna move out of my house, you gotta get married. Yeah, so that's kind of how that happened. And then we got uh got married, and then I had another little girl, Jayla, and then I had a son. And then at the age of 23, things got rocky, and I'm like, you know what? I can't do this anymore. You know, I was my parents divorced when I was 10, and I didn't want my kids to go through the same thing that I went through growing up in a divorced home because holidays look a little different when you're in a um two different parent household. You have lots of love, but it still affects the child, and I didn't want my kids to grow up like that, but at the end of the day, my peace and my sanity meant a little bit more, so I had to do what I had to do. Actually, move back at home with my mom and my stepdad for about a year until I got myself on my feet. And so after that all happened a few years later, you know, having little friends and whatever, whatever, then I finally said, God, you know, I am tired of doing this. God, I need to get myself together. So I found joy. So if you are a parent right now that may be a single mom that have um maybe been married, divorced, and thought that you would never get married again, find yourself, find what makes you happy because you have to actually dig deep inside and find what makes you happy and get you a checklist of what you will and what you won't put up with a man. And so God can actually send you the man that you want. And when I tell you, God did that for me in 2014, God did that for me. So my husband now, Derek, and I, we've been married 11 years, and one of the biggest things for me was when God, when you send me this man, he has to love me and my three kids like they're his very own. And when I tell you, God did his big thing when he created him for me, yes. So I'm just thankful for that. And um, that's my motherhood journey. It was not easy, of course. Definitely not easy raising a child at the age of 15, but I did it because I was determined not to be a statistic. I was determined, okay, I had this one baby at a young age. I will not keep repeating the cycle. Because, see, that usually was what happens. Usually when a child when a teenage mother has a baby within the within 24 months of the that one baby, she has another baby. But I was like, oh, nope, that's not happening. I was not going to do that at all. So I'm thankful that I had my support system because support system means everything. So without a support system, you know, it's a little bit harder, but you can definitely do it. So fast forward how I became an author. My dad called me one day. Now keep in mind, keep in mind, my dad's a preacher, right? A pastor of a church. He says, Joy, I think that you should write your book. You should write a book. And I'm like, Daddy, you do not want me to write this book because there's gonna be some things in there that you do not know about, and you're gonna find out about them, and the world's gonna find out about them. Are you sure? And he said, Baby girl, you don't know who you may inspire with your story, you don't know who you may help. And I was like, Okay, I'm gonna do it. So I did. I wrote my book, I told my story in my book, and once I had that book signing and saw the people there that supported me, and my little book, as the haters say, that little book, um, I had so many people that were reaching out to me, not just teenage moms, but adults. 60 women that were 60 years old that said, Girl, we have walked in the same shoes. And I'm like, What? And they was like, Well, you was in my house, you was in my house. Like, you really have told my story, and that made me feel so good knowing that I was able to help someone heal. Because what we tend to think sometimes is whatever we're going through is not just for us, it's to help someone else. And it took me a little while to realize that. And I'm like, huh? And so now I knew whatever I was going through, it was to help someone else in their situation. So I'll tell you now that if I'm sure you're wondering, oh, so what is your child doing? So my son that I had when I was 15, we grew up together. Oh my gosh. So weird, but we did. He is now 22 years old. He is he has his career job. Um, he is a cybersecurity major. And I couldn't be more proud knowing that my son that I had at 15 is 22 years old, and he's doing great things. I'm just proud. My 17-year-old, she's a senior this year, so she'll graduate. And then I have a 15-year-old Jackson. So I have Jaden, Jayla, and Jackson. And I'm thankful because God has really blessed me with some amazing kids, and they haven't given me any trouble. Thank God. All glory goes to God. So that is about my motherhood um journey.

SPEAKER_01 16:02

Thank you so much for sharing your journey. You have so many highlights that are just amazing. Um, although you started at a young age and your your numbers are 15, 19, 23, you're 37 and you able to boast. Well, I don't based on the math. 37, 38. I'm 38 now. Okay. And I'm sorry if I'm putting out into the world and you didn't want me to. I love people to know how old I am.

SPEAKER_00 16:31

I don't have 38. You know, and I want the viewers to know, like, when people ask you how old you are, you tell them how old you are. Because it's a your birthday is a blessing. To wake up every year is a blessing from God. I've never understood why people have a problem with that. But anyway, sorry.

SPEAKER_01 16:49

No, you you don't have to apologize at all. But like now, you you 15, 19, 23, and can boast about it at 38. So keep on moving. Every every year you add on another year of bragging. Um, so I just you have a theme of support, and I I truly, truly love that. Um, we don't often get that type of support from young black women in your situation, specifically, um, who are PKs, who were pregnant as teenagers, or even as young women, not even teenagers, but maybe college age and or or not even that, but who weren't married when they got pregnant. So it is amazing that you had two parents that were like, we're gonna do this, and we're gonna do this together, and we're gonna build for better. And and now you get to walk in your better. So that's awesome. Um, I do have a question, but I also want to start with uh just just saying that our generation has this conviction, right? We have this conviction and we have this authority and this empowerment to use our voice, to be able to tell our stories. And I wonder how many podcasters are in our age range, actually, now that I'm saying this out loud. But we have this, we have this natural desire to be able to share about what we went through so that other people can learn. And we have so many people coming to us and saying, that was needed, or um, thank you for sharing that story, because I never got to share my story. And I found it very interesting that it was your dad who came to you and said, When are you gonna write your book? How what was the feeling whenever he came to you about that?

SPEAKER_00 18:57

First of all, so honestly, at one point in my life I used Facebook as a journal, and and I would be like, Chapter three in my book says this, and chapter such and such in my book, and then I would put 15, 19. I remember that so vividly. So I would joke about writing a book, but my dad actually called me, and when he called me, I was like, for real? And just a little snippet, I never like to read or write. Like I would journal, always journal, because my mom just told me to journal. She was because she was the school counselor, and she said, Whoever your best friend is, that they have a best friend. So whenever you think that you're telling them something in secret, they're probably telling their best friend, you know, about it. So I just would always journal private stuff or either goals, I would just journal. And I encourage viewers, if you're watching it today, matter of fact, pick up the nailed um journal that she has. But anyway, that's it. See how you can get it. But no, journaling is really good because I would always write the date on it so I could go back to it, but back to my question because I will get off topic. So anyway, so when my dad called me and said, write the book, I said, okay. And so it was just so happened my husband was leaving to go out of town to work February 1st of 2022, is when I started writing my book. And I got finished with my book in May. And so it didn't take me long at all because I was determined that that was gonna be my 35th birthday present to myself. And when I tell you that was my birthday present to myself, I don't know how old you are, Tamara, but 35 for me gave me life. 35 for me is when I was like my confidence, it was something about the age of 35 that just gave me new life. And I was really walking in my purpose and really, I don't know. I'm just I'm having a flashback. That's why I'm kind of like, I'm just thinking about, you know, being 35 years old and literally finding myself and yeah, walk walking in my in my God giving purpose. And that's how she changes everything started. Um, she changes everything as an organization that I have, and it's for at first I thought it was just gonna be for teen moms because that's what I'll that's what I was. I was a teen mom. So I wanted to give team moms hope to let them know that hey, if I got through it, you can too. Because that's my quote. If I got through it, you can too.

unknown 21:59

And

SPEAKER_00 22:00

They will have that support system to say, you know what, she finished high school. I can do it. She went to college. I know that I can do it because I'm not better than anyone. And it's just my mind has always been wanting to help others. So then when I realized she changes everything, isn't just for teen moms, it's for women, it's for girls to help find their true authentic self so they can find themselves and make healthy decisions and decisions that's gonna help them for the rest of their lives.

SPEAKER_01 22:35

I love that. I truly love that. Um there's some so many things that you said. So let me just go back. I've resonated with so much. She changes everything. Just the woman's touch. Like that's what I hear. A woman's touch is necessary. Have a man design an event. It'll be done. Well, maybe. It might get done. That's right. But have a woman take on that event. It will be major. It will be an event. It will be a fashion show. It will be, it will be an experience when you walk into the room and you feel something just because of the colors that you see or the music that's playing or the food that they chose. She changes everything. I love that. But also, 35 was my year too. Um, I I told my I started a blog. I did not, I was not successful. I thought I was gonna do 35 posts by 35. That did not happen. I probably got three. Um, because like you, I I love writing, but I also like writing in increments. So, like when I'm really, really into writing something that I'm really strict I feel strongly about, I'll knock it out really fast. But if I have to schedule something and come back to it, I probably won't get to it. So that's what happened with the blog. But 35 by 35 was my goal, and that's whenever I wanted to change the world. It didn't happen. The blog was called Girl Me Too. Because we go through so much and we keep things inside, and we don't talk about it. And then when we do say something, we're like, I experienced something like that too. And then we start sharing commonalities and we start sharing trauma, but we also start sharing how we got out, and we start sharing purpose, and we we start seeing connections and all of that jazz. And that actually is a good segue into my part two of my question. So it is very interesting that your dad wanted you to share because I've had older people, and I won't I won't call them out, but I've had older people, even when I started this blog. Um, so there were a couple book ideas that I've had and um in this blog, this podcast. Um, when I started this podcast, they wanted to know what was going to be shared on the podcast because they'd only wanted certain parts of my life to be shared because they don't want the ugly truth to be out, just the truth that makes you look good. But for me, the ugly truth is what makes the purpose meaningful, and it's what makes life powerful, and that's what draws and and creates change. So I just love I love the fact that your dad was as a pastor, right?

SPEAKER_00 26:04

So we've had that conversation before because um, you know, my dad has never been that type. First of all, he's nun judge judgmental. And second of all, he he's we've talked about how pastors back in the day would make the girl go in front of the church and apologize and ask for forgiveness, but what a boy at. He don't get up there. You get what I'm saying? So, and that's shame when you do that, and not saying everybody knows what they're doing because I know what I was doing. That's why I told you I didn't want nobody to feel sorry for me because I knew what I was doing. The thing about it is, and my dad will always say this a lot of people in the church doing the same thing, they just didn't get caught up. You get what I'm saying? So I happened to get caught up, and all he could do was love me and my son, and that's that. And you are right, a lot of people they don't want you to tell the ugly truth, but the ugly truth saved lives, the ugly truth helped people become who they are today, the ugly truth helped people get out of the tunnel. Girl, don't make me start preaching, bring it up. I'm just saying, the ugly truth, and I think if we had more people to support, that's why a lot of stuff goes on in the church, and people be scared to talk about things because they're supposed to keep it, you know. You're supposed to keep the mask off. Get to your news, and it's just like one of them things like, you know what, it's time to take the mask off and let's help these people, you know, and let's help these young ladies become young ladies and let them know, hey baby, you know what, you're gonna be okay. Let me see what you need instead of instead of looking in the Amen corner with our nose turned up. Let's help them. What can we do? Because you really don't know what they got going on at home, and then they get judged at the church. Who can they run to? Nobody. And then we then when they go tell the teacher at school for help, then you get mad. So yeah, that's that.

SPEAKER_01 28:44

Yep. Mm-hmm. Yeah. So you, we talked about you being humble before we started this call. And um, although you have shared so much of your life with us, you have written seven books, not just one. Your dad came to you and he said to you, When are you gonna write your book? And that was in 2022, it is 2025, and you have since authored seven books.

SPEAKER_02 29:13

Friend, can you please give us the book? Yes.

SPEAKER_00 29:21

So I'm I'm so the 151923 is the book. It's the book. So, of course, the organization, she changes everything. I came out with the journal. Um, I have the journal. Then I have the it's called The Will of Life. It's literally like a notebook, something that I I had started off running copies off when I go speak at schools and um detention centers, and I had the paper copies, and I was like, this needs to be a book. And it's so it's called The Will, she changes everything, the will of life, basically talking about um self-self-esteem, healthy decision making, all of those things. That's three. Then I have navigating life as a teen mom. Um, so it's basically just for teen moms to actually sit back and think about it's a journal as well. Then I have um six, I'm a co-author in two of the moments for mom, volume three and four. Um, there's a snippet in there. So then I feel like I maybe missed. So my husband and I um we started a marriage ministry called We Change Everything. And so we have a 31-day devotional. Um, that's just kind of how we started our marriage by waking up and praying every morning. So we have that 31-day devotional and affirmation book, and we have a guided journal that um you can sit back and reflect. So I have a lot of a lot of um journals because journaling is my thing. And I feel like everyone should, because one thing I know about that is the journal can't talk back to you, the paper cannot talk back to it. You could talk to that paper and write on that paper all day long and tell your feelings, but the journal cannot um talk back to you. But what you can do, you use it as a tool because when you get to where you want to be, you will look back and say, This is how far that I've came? I like this far? You mean to tell me I was in a dark place like that? And you pray to God that you never get that dark days again. Now you may fall down, but you're gonna get back up and you will never want to get back down like you were when you start reading that journal and you see where you are. So those are the those are my publications.

SPEAKER_01 32:01

I love it. Thank you for sharing it. So the she changes everything, um, journal. Uh-huh. Is that for any woman or is that for moms?

SPEAKER_00 32:14

It's for any woman, it's for it's for anybody. So she changes everything basically. She, meaning you, any woman, has the ability to change anything about them, but it takes a mindset. Your mind has to be made, and that's with anything, anything with life. But once a woman's mind is made up, I'm sorry, y'all might feel some kind of way, but what R. Kelly says, it ain't nothing that you could do about it. So we when when a woman's mind made up is over with. So you as a woman have the ability to change any situation.

SPEAKER_01 32:57

Absolutely. That's perfect. Um, my sisters and I are thinking about doing a Bible study together. So we might we might use this journal together. Um, awesome. Let's see. I did not realize the statistic about um repeating the cycle when you become a teen mom. Now, now that you've mentioned it, um, when you become a teen mom within 24 months, you are more liable to be become a mother again. It makes sense because I've seen it. I work in the schools and I've seen it. Um, I've seen it when I was in high school. And it's like, oh, that that is a real thing. I never realized this statistic.

SPEAKER_00 33:46

So I have it on the back of my book. Can I read it to you really quick? Yes, absolutely. So it is reported that three in 10 American girls will become pregnant at least once before age 20. That's the first one. Three in 10 will become pregnant before the age of 20. There's nearly 750,000 teen pregnancies every year. Statistically, about 25% of teen moms have a second child within 24 months of their first baby, and less than 2% of teen moms earn a college degree by the age of 30. And I purposely put that on my in my book because it's all in the book, so I didn't tell much about it because I would love for, you know, you to purpose. But I'm just gonna tell you, I graduated high school a whole year early. So that means I went to I went to college early. So by the age of 30, I had had, I was divorced and everything, but I had had my my bachelor's degree. You know what I mean? By the age of 30, I had three kids married again and all the things. But it was like, okay, when they see this, they're gonna be like, okay, I know that's not true. So, yeah, absolutely.

SPEAKER_01 35:08

I love that. I love that. With that statistic, well, well, with the the thought about repeating cycles, and you said that you refused to be somebody who was going to repeat the cycle specific to getting pregnant again as a teen mom, but you are now a mother of three teenagers, three two teenagers, one whole adult with a career, and you can look back and say, you have successfully broken the cycle right now, right? Right. How does that make you feel? And how do you feel how do you feel that you your spiritual life has done that? Wow.

SPEAKER_00 35:54

It's an amazing feeling because first of all, I already knew that when it happened, Mama said you gotta have this baby. You know, I'm like, okay, cool. And I was determined. So it was one of those things because when you determine to do something, you're gonna make sure that you see it through. And so now having my kids, my oldest son, Jaden of 22, he was like, Mama, I promise I won't be like you and my dad. Girl, that meant everything to me. Because one thing I know about kids is they're either gonna do exactly what their parents do, or they're gonna be better than their parents. And I want all of my kids to be better than me. And so he promised that he would not have any kids. So that meant something to me because it's like, okay, he he understands, like, it's a process. But my faith with God, like, even though I was 15 and I um was having sex and had um, you know, my child out of wedlock, I still prayed to God. We still have a relationship, and he's never left me, and he will never leave me. And my favorite scripture is Philippians 4 and 13 because I know I can do all things through Christ. And I know that God has helped me and He has kept me when I couldn't even keep myself. When I didn't know what in the world am I gonna do with a baby at 15? What am I gonna how am I gonna even give birth to this baby? What does that look like at 15? You know, how am I gonna go to school and come home and raise a baby? But I can do all things. And I did it. All things. Yes.

SPEAKER_01 37:54

Okay, so this would be the last question, simply because of time, because I feel like we could just keep going. This conversation is wonderful. Compare yourself at the age of 17 as a mom, and the age of 22 as a mom. You had three kids by now, right? What was the biggest stressor at 17? And what was the biggest stressor at 22?

SPEAKER_00 38:25

Everything is different, everything is different, and if I can be 100% honest, it probably was easier at 17 than it was at 22. Because at 17, I had one child and support. And and if it was anything, it was like, oh, I can't really hang out with my friends like I want to. Oh, they're going to football games and parties and prom and homecoming and all those things, you know, that I couldn't do. But then at 22, you got to keep in mind I got divorced at 23. And I had three kids. So for the sake of time, you can put whatever you want to say for that because it's what it's what it is. You get what I'm saying? So you have more kids, more responsibility, still the support, still the support with from family and all, but it's more trying to figure out, okay, and I ain't finna do this no more with the marriage situation. So trying to maneuver all those things. Yeah, girl.

SPEAKER_01 39:37

That's why I picked that age. Um well, thank you so much for sharing a little bit about your personal parenting journey. And I know it was just a little bit. You've done so much. You got to talk about she changes everything. You got to talk about all of the publications that you've had and all of the wins that you've had out of your journey at from becoming a mom at 15. I'm excited about where you're going. I'm excited about your podcast uh with our lovely Juanita Woodson, who referred you to be on the show. And I think we shout out Juanita. Hey, girl, hey! We thank you for your referral because we love Joy. And thank you, Joy, again. Um we are going to jump into our game, and then we'll give you an opportunity in a little bit to share any encouraging words. So let's play tea time and let me get my clock up so we can play tea time and you can see the clock. So tea time is a game of rapid fire. Joy will have three minutes on the clock to answer as many questions as she can in just a little bit of time. Okay. So that we get a little bit more insight into who she is. So, Joy, are you ready to play? I love a good game. Let's go. Oh, yes. I love a challenge. Oh, okay. Okay, challenge. Okay, challenge. Listeners, I hope you're ready because we are in three minutes starts now. First question for the night. If you could give your younger self-advice, what would it be? My younger self-advice keep going. Keep going. Yes, keep going. Because you're an offer, honey. What is your go-to comfort food?

SPEAKER_00 41:40

Sweets, love chocolate, turtles to be exact.

SPEAKER_01 41:44

Yes, I haven't had turtles forever. Okay. Name your life's Broadway play. If I got through it, you can too.

unknown 41:54

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 41:55

I like that. Which emoji do you use the most? The two hearts. If fear wasn't a factor, what dreams would you choose right now? I would probably get a puppy.

SPEAKER_00 42:08

I'm terrified of dogs.

SPEAKER_01 42:11

Oh. What is the last TV show or movie you binge watched? Reasonable doubt and sisters. Hmm. Those are Tyler Perry, both of them. Not reasonable doubt, but sisters is. Reasonable doubt. Gotta check that one out. Hulu. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 42:34

If you could instantly master any skill, what would it be? Running at least two miles. Nonstop.

SPEAKER_01 42:42

I would say running at this point. Morning person or night owl.

SPEAKER_00 42:48

Morning person.

SPEAKER_01 42:50

Oop. What's the best gift you ever received? My three kids. Precious. What season of life are you in right now? And what is it teaching you? Walking in my purpose.

SPEAKER_00 43:04

Being obedient. Obedient is better than sacrifice.

SPEAKER_01 43:09

Yes, I love that. Name one book, podcast, or resource that's changed your perspective. Hope at the end of the tunnel. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 43:19

What's the worst piece of advice you ever received? You're singing hard on that one. Let's pass. What's your hidden? What's your hidden talent? I don't know if you have a hidden talent. You don't have a hidden talent.

SPEAKER_01 43:50

You don't have a hidden talent. I have to think about that one. I don't know. You're you're right. No, it isn't. Is it VD?

SPEAKER_02 44:02

That's a good question. That you got me really thinking.

SPEAKER_01 44:08

So, Joy, we want to thank you again for joining Nailed Motherhood Podcast. And I do want to give you back the mic to share any encouraging words or inspiration that you would like to give for any parents today.

SPEAKER_00 44:21

All right. So after listening to my story, listening to all the things that I've said, I just want to leave you with this. No matter where you are, if you think about anything that I've said, always know if that girl Joy got through it, I can too. And it's so true. So keep pushing. You got this. Keep going.

SPEAKER_01 44:44

If that girl Joy got through it, I know I can too. I love it. And you will. Yes, you can and you will. Thank you, Joy, so much. What is next for you? And how can listeners connect with you after today? Yes.

SPEAKER_00 45:00

So my husband, Derek, and I just started, just started our marriage ministry. We changed everything. Oh my gosh, God is simply amazing. So Derek and I moved from um Mobile about a year ago. And God literally separated us from family. We're here by ourselves. It's just the two of us. And so when I tell you, God gave us this vision in January, and He gave us the instructions on what to do, how to launch it, and everything. So that is what's that's what that's what I'm working on. That's what we are working on. And we hosted our very first marriage retreat in November. It was in Hoover, Alabama. And the next one will be in um Orange Beach, Alabama, in um next year 2026 in October. So that is what we're working on. And she changes everything is in the rebranding stage. So stay tuned with all of that. And you can connect with me on my website at joywestfalo.com. So I am Joy West Falo on Facebook. And once you go on my website, you can click on all the different links. My TikTok, YouTube, all the above. My husband and I have a podcast as well, and it's on YouTube, and it's um WCE2014. So basically, we change everything 2014. But again, everything is on my website.

SPEAKER_01 46:30

Awesome. Thank you so much for sharing all of that. Um, all of the links and the handles. I will make sure that all of that is in the description below. So any listeners can first go to the website. But if you miss the website and you just want to go directly to something, I'll have all of that there as well. So make sure you connect with Joy. And if you are a male listener and you want to connect to we change everything, connect to the phalos because we want you to be able to change everything. Okay. When we say everything, we mean everything. So again, thank you, Joy, for joining us. We had a blast listening to your personal parenting journey. If we had more time, we would listen to I had so many notes. I would ask so many more questions. We might have to have you back. We might have to have a panel um episode with you and Juanita and some other moments for moms or or Lego legacy unlocked moms. Who knows what will happen? I'm just talking right now, but you know, maybe it'll come into fruition because I put it out in the air.

SPEAKER_00 47:43

But it will manifest it.

SPEAKER_01 47:46

Absolutely. Let's manifest it. Um, before we go, I have three questions that I ask everyone. I'm not gonna change anything with you. I want to ask you the same questions. So the first question is parenting hard?

SPEAKER_00 48:02

Of course, parenting is hard, it looks different from everyone, and it's basically how you make it.

SPEAKER_01 48:07

There you go. I like that answer. It's how you make it, and sometimes I make it harder than it needs to be.

SPEAKER_00 48:14

Just play a song. That's all you have to do. Find that song for your kid. Right. But are they still standing? They are, by the grace of God, yes.

SPEAKER_01 48:28

Yes, I love that. So, what do you want to proudly tell our guests today?

SPEAKER_00 48:34

I got through it, and this mama is nailing it.

SPEAKER_01 48:40

Yes, that mama, she is nailing it. I love it. Thank you so much. If you like this episode and you want to hear more personal parenting stories like that of Joy West Halo, please make sure you subscribe to my social media at Nailed It Motherhood Podcast on Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube. And don't forget to follow us on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode. We also have a website that is nailed at motherhoodpodcast.com. That's your one-stop shop for all things Nailed It Motherhood, including our brand new Nailed It Motherhood shop where you can grab journals, merch, and more to support your parenting journey. We welcome your questions, your comments, and your ideas, and we definitely hope to keep the conversation going. Until next time, listeners, keep on doing what it is you do. Smooches!