A self-destructive gear kicks in as Alex cannot handle what has happened. Hashim takes first steps in a new world, apart from Alex.
Please go to henrikwilenius.com for more info.
A self-destructive gear kicks in as Alex cannot handle what has happened. Hashim takes first steps in a new world, apart from Alex.
Please go to henrikwilenius.com for more info.
While the words ricocheted in the grand dome, hashim kept his head low and said a silent prayer asking for mercy, like he had done thousands of times since realizing he was gay.
Speaker 2:My name is Henrik Milenges and I am the author of the Rise Up Trilogy, a young adult coming of age story about Hashim, Alex and Marian confront in real life issues like climate change, corrupt politics, animal cruelty and racial and gender equity. This weekly serialized audiobook podcast is narrated by Scott Summers 12.
Speaker 1:Alex perched on the railing tapping his foot. I need a cigarette, he said and massaged his temples. A throbbing headache was pressing on him from both sides of his skull. Before he met up with Nico, he had tried to get some booze from the liquor store with his fake ID, but the cashier had threatened to call the cops if he didn't leave the premises immediately. He paid $150 for that card. Nico crossed his arms. But you don't even smoke. Ah, I want to get snookered, smashed, shitfaced, plastered, trash, wasted, snosed, soosed. Nico asked when you bugger got that word. You're not the only one who can read. Alex stood up. Let's get out of here. I need a drink. You made that bloody clear already. Shall we go to J's? If that fucking Lenny shows his face, I'm gonna redecorate it, alex said. He could already imagine how good it would feel to punch that stupid face. This was all Lenny's fault. Why did he have to open his big mouth in the first place? Thoughts to start. And his stupid cousin too. Alex added Bob's, your uncle. Nico said and rolled his eyes. Who the hell is Bob? Never mind, just rambling.
Speaker 1:Alex headed for the overpass. He didn't need to check if Nico was following him, having some minutes after he had tried to kill that stupid trash can, his phone had started ringing. At first he tried to ignore it, but he knew Nico. That guy wouldn't give up until he answered. Although Nico was often an irritating, opinionated prick, his mate's feet were firmly on the ground. For Alex, that was a very positive thing. When so many guys were full of hype with no substance, nico was the real deal who walked the talk. It was still a mystery how Nico had known to call him so soon and he hadn't bothered to ask. The good thing was that Nico hadn't bombarded him with questions about his sheen's whereabouts, as he was still too tense to talk about what had happened.
Speaker 1:Stopping in the middle of the overpass, alex peered down at the passing cars. He heard steps getting closer but refused to look. Then, in his peripheral vision, he recognized Nico's lanky figure leaning on the railing only a few feet from him. I'm so goddamn sick and tired of this stupid place, alex said. It's always the same. I wish I could just skip this miserable whole and never come back. And what's stopping you? Alex glanced at Nico. His chest felt tight, so tight that it was constricting his throat and making it hard to talk. She don't save people. Nico continued. People save themselves. What the hell are you talking about? Alex blurted as he clutched the railing rocking back and forth. After a while he stopped and let his hands drop to his sides. I mean, he only recently got out of rehab. I can't. That was four months ago. He's got to learn to stand on his own. You can't babysit him forever. You've got your own life to live, mate. Alex clenched his jaw as he watched a black town car approaching from the west. Why don't you ask him what he thinks? Why don't you ask him yourself? You wanker, alex said and spat over the railing onto the oncoming traffic 13.
Speaker 1:Hesheen jerked his head back as the gob landed on his side of the window. He had spotted Alex on the overpass right before the town car dived underneath the bridge, his hand gripping the armrest. He felt a sudden coldness hitting at his core. Sitting next to him, justin continued his story, oblivious to what had just happened. We were standing in that stupid line and I told Noel my balls will freeze up and fall off in this snowstorm. So you know what he did. He took me by the hand and we marched up this big jackass bouncer, not paying any attention to what Justin was saying.
Speaker 1:Hesheen crumpled onto his seat. Alex must have seen him inside, and that spit was meant for him. Wait, wait, justin continued. Noel slipped a freaking Benjamin to the Hulk and we walked right in like we owned the place. He saw Justin staring at him, waiting for him to say something, but he didn't have a clue what Justin had been talking about. He tried to force a smile, but his cheeks refused to cooperate. Then he caught sight of the backseat passenger window next to the front one where Noel was sitting. The former was clearly tinted. If you compare these two, it was impossible for Alex to have seen him. Justin's brows drew closer. You're okay? Uh, yeah, sure, hesheen said as the tension drained out of him. Justin tilted his head. Oh, I get it, you're worried. Some of your friends might see you I was once too or that you might not get in. But no worries, you're with us. Hesheen nodded and leaned back on the plus seat as Noel was paying the entrance fee.
Speaker 1:Hesheen gaped at the posters for the upcoming events Games, drag queen, gay, erotic bingo, leather and bears and lace. Leather and lace how did these two go together? He had seen some time with Finland, drawings on the net of muscular men in leather in more or less compromising positions. He had found them enticing, but the lace threw him off. It didn't sound right. In this context, the last poster on the wall had foam party written in big pink letters. That's hot, justin said. Imagine hundreds of hot men clad only in Speedos or shorts, all those pumped up muscles gleaming with foam. This inside. Hesheen fought hard not to yell. The idea that everybody here was like him made his skin tingle. It was like a utopian dream come true.
Speaker 1:Hesheen gawked at a handsome man with the slender guy perning in the corner, their bodies half entwined. Then the man looked up and winked Instinctively. He dropped his head but raised it again to see the man giving him the eye. Alice in Wonderland. Justin said let me have your jacket. Hesheen crossed his arms and gave a curt shake of his head.
Speaker 1:Seeing so many good looking guys flaunting their fit bodies and skimpy clothes made him shy. You've worked for it. Noel said come on, do it for me. Hesheen parted his lips and fixed his attention on Noel, blocking out everybody else in the room. Hesheen peeled off his jacket slowly and teasingly, revealing underneath a tight black, sleeveless shirt that accentuated his lean, powerfully built torso. Every nerve ending was starring and tingling in his body as he let the jacket drop on the floor. Wow, noel said with a huge grin. You're natural. Just look around you. Hesheen sucked in a quick breath after seeing all these men staring at him. A flood of adrenaline rushed through his veins, making it hard to stand still. He couldn't believe what he had done. He had never showed off like this before and he had never thought anybody could find him hot, least of all on a place full of attractive men. Noel cracked when he saw the bewilderment on Hesheen's face turning into a mischievous grin. Oh my, you're going to be a real heartbreaker. Put my words.
Speaker 1:Hashim stood at the edge of the dance floor as Justin pointed out different subgroups like muscle marries, jocks, bears, otters, wolves, butch lesbians, twinks, daddies, circuit boys, artifacts, boy babes, lipstick lesbians. And what am I? Hashim asked. You could be a twink, but you're actually a twunk. Justin said and laughed. What the heck is a twunk? It sounds like laundry detergent. A twunk is a twink with muscles.
Speaker 1:As Justin joined Noel to get some drinks, hashim stared at the people on the dance floor. He really felt like he had stepped into a whole different world with his own lingo, style and way of doing things. Before he could elaborate on this idea further, something caught his attention near the entrance. Hashim couldn't see clearly because so many people were blocking his view. He rose to his toes and froze. It was Inga, lenny's ex, and she was heading his way. He clutched his neck and rubbed it, his eyes darting back and forth in search of a place to hide, hashim lunged behind a pillar and leaned back to make himself invisible. As he tried to think of a verse to suit the occasion, he remembered the formula the Prophet had used to stay hidden from enemy sites by reciting three specific verses from the Quran.
Speaker 1:However, the occasion didn't really call for a celestial intervention. As it turned out, the pillar was way too thin to hide a broad-shouldered guy like Hashim, and Inga recognized him right away. She circled the column and stopped right in front of him, rolling down the fort, she asked. Hashim looked down. Oh it's you, he said, clamping his lips. Inga cracked up. And what are you doing here? I-? Hashim coughed twice, covering his mouth with the palm of his hand. He couldn't think of anything to say. He had been caught red-handed at the gay bar. For a second he entertained the notion of a flat denial, saying that he really didn't know that he had entered the homo-headquarters of their town, as if it wasn't evident already at the entrance with the poster of an athletic young man in hot pants.
Speaker 1:Before Hashim had a chance to incriminate himself any further, inga turned her attention to Noelle, who approached from the bar with drinks in his hand. She saw the hungry, lustful look on Noelle's face, which he tried to hide behind a complacent smile. Then she nodded with annoying grin to no one particular. Oh you found company, noelle said, and handed him the bottle. I'll, uh, let you two talk. See you in a bit. As Noelle walked away, inga pushed up her long sleeves. Somebody's been keeping secrets.
Speaker 1:Hashim nodded, biting down a smile, and took a sip from his wine cooler Clubbing drinking secret lover, what else he's not my lover. Yet Inga burst out laughing. You really going nuts, my friend. Where's the pious, quiet boy in dress pants and a button-up shirt? Oh, I bet soon you're gonna hop on a table and do a little show. Uh, actually I sort of did already. Not on the table, though, hashim said, remembering his little show of taking off his jacket. You're kidding me right? Hashim bounced from foot to foot and beamed.
Speaker 1:Hesheen peaked at two girls making out on a neighboring couch. The soft lounge music didn't stop the smacking sound from reaching his ears. Straightening his back, he said I still have a hard time understanding that there's a place like this where people can be who they are without anybody getting in trouble. Inga nodded. I know I was wondering the same thing when I came here for the first time. But how about your parents? Do they know? God know and never will.
Speaker 1:Clutching his elbow, hesheen exiled heavily. I don't want to think about it. The shame of having a gay son. It would only ruin them. They would blame themselves and if people in the mosque found out, many of them would cut my parents off. He chopped the air with his hand, just like that. Well, my dad chased me around the house with a shotgun. Win, no, I'm joking. Inga said. Actually, my mom confessed she dipped in the lady pond in college. Hesheen wrinkled his forehead, not understanding what Inga meant. Bumper to bumper, hesheen winced Way too much information. Inga grinned. Then she turned serious again. Hesheen said unless 1.6 billion Muslims suddenly get struck by the magic wand of the big fat fairy, godmother? Inga laughed out loud Wow, who's going all campy now? I never knew you had it in you. Wrinkling his nose, hesheen tilted his head to the side Me either as the smile died on his face. He sighed Anyway, I don't know how I'm going to do it, I just know there's no way of stuffing the genie back into the teapot, not after seeing all of this.
Speaker 2:Hey.
Speaker 1:Inga said and leaned forward I'm sure you will find a way to tell them sooner than you think, inshaallah. What does that mean, if Allah wills it? Hesheen said and how about this hot stuff? What's his name? Hesheen's face lighted up Noelle, his name is Noelle. The way he looked at you oh, I swear I saw some drool coming out of his mouth. You did. When Inga nodded, he continued it's incredible. Only two hours ago, I thought this is it, my life is over. When, really and it just barely begun no-transcript Hashim pushed his weight to the counter, his brain on overdrive, trying to figure out how to score with Noelle.
Speaker 1:Like everything else that evening, he was venturing into completely unknown territory. A short gay movie he had dared to watch on YouTube under the covers involved downing a shot of tequila, and that's exactly what Hashim was about to do. As Hashim cleared his throat, the bartender turned to look at him and then his mind went blank when he saw that hunky bartender was wearing very snug shorts. He hadn't realized it before because of the legion of eager patrons blocking the way. Trying to make sense of the labels on the vast selection of bottles in the shelves, hashim finally blurted A shot, please. And what kind, asked the bartender with a writhed smile. Uh, just a shot, you know. As the bartender raised his eyebrows, hashim frowned. He couldn't recall the name of the brand in the movie. Then he saw a somewhat familiar looking golden bottle on the shelf, pointing to it. He said that one. The bartender smirked it's caught tequila.
Speaker 1:Hashim slapped two fivers on the counter Keep the change. As he raised the glass, the pungent smell infiltrated his nose. He knew he should guzzle it in one go if he was going to do it at all. When the golden liquid hit the back of his throat, hashim jerked his head as if he had been smacked right on the face. Eyes watering, he went with every fiber of his being. The bartender shoved a slice of lemon into his hand. He grabbed it like a drowning man and chewed the whole thing up, the peel included. A few milliseconds later the alcohol hit his nerves. He shot out his hands to get a firm grip on the bar to keep himself from doubling over. After taking several quick breaths, hashim looked up and saw he had drawn quite an audience. Even the hot but bitchy face bartender was smiling, genuinely smiling, his face still contorted into a grimace. Hashim said One more, please. Even the most jaded among them couldn't hide their astonishment. Still, hashim continued only getting and walked off beaming.
Speaker 2:Thank you for listening to the Rise Up trilogy podcast. For more information, go to my website, henrikvillenewscom.