God normally speaks . He speaks to all of us and he's been silent this year , very different from past years and past seasons , from walking with him , but he's been silent and normally when we think that you know , when God is silent it's a bad thing , but I've noticed that , like when God is silent , I think that's a leap that I'm in and I think he's still going to walk me through that , like his silence is still sovereign , like his silence is good , like it's okay , like even right now , like God knows , like okay , I have a specific situation that like , hmm , that God needs to happen , like so when you're going to come through Jesus , but I know when he's silent , I know he's working .
Speaker 2Welcome to the Taking the Leaps podcast with me , your host , fellow leaper and coach . I know he's working and trailblazer leaps . My hope is that you will see how God is with you every step of the way and begin to confidently trust him as he leads you into your next leap . It's time to live a leaping lifestyle . You ready , let's go . Welcome , christina . Thank you so much for joining me on the podcast . Thank you so much for having me . So I'm excited because , just from our pre-conversation , it is very evident that you are a trailblazer and you have done all of the leaps . So , before we dive into just some of that story and the ultimate thing that I wanted to talk about , tell us a little bit about you and just some of your leap and journey .
Speaker 1So I'm grateful , rachel , for this opportunity . Hello everyone , I am Christina . I guess my stage name is Christina Renee . I am a aspiring Bible teacher In 2018 , I knew that God was calling me to teach his word and just everything about it I'm literally obsessed with , and so I knew that that was again the leap that I'll talk about later that God was stepping me into . Was that leap ? Because I'm like Lord , I don't even know how to read . I don't know what to read , but Holy Spirit just led every single part of the way . I do have a ministry called Spiritual Healing Sisterhood . It is a nonprofit organization where we help women become whole and heal in Jesus .
Speaker 1I did write a devotional called Strength in Him , and that was actually on accident . I had absolutely no idea that I was getting ready to write a book and all the things that came with writing a book , and I just did all this research and , lo and behold , I thought the devotion was too good . I was writing it for myself and the Lord was calling me to write a book out of it . So I love that . Yes , oh my gosh . He like was squeezing , he's like you need to get this book out . And I'm like , okay , okay , I'll get the book out and I'll share a little bit . Actually , the name Strengthen Him actually didn't start off that way . It was called Daily Devils with Christina . It was just something I did and I felt pressed like I think I want to do devotionals . That's when I really started . Devotional writing was 2020 , because everyone's in their house and we're not doing anything .
Speaker 1So , that's how that , that's how that birthed out out . And so I had a friend . He confirmed yeah , you should devotionals . And I was like , okay , well , how do I do it ? Well , again , with the trailblazer , people have gone before me and did things that I wanted to do . So I literally found an email of people that I follow . I looked at the bottom and said , okay , well , what did they do ? Because if they did it , I can do it . So that's my encouragement . If they , if anyone , can do it , I can do it as well . So don't discount yourself . Even though I'm nobody . Nobody knows my name , but Holy Spirit knows your name and that's all that's important .
Speaker 1And so I wrote devotionals every day . Every Monday I would send them out to friends and family because they were so gracious . I had like 14 emails . You know five of them are mine , but it's okay , I sent them out anyway . And so , long story short , the Lord gave me . I asked him , I said God , what is one word that I can describe this year when writing devotionals ? And he said strength . I said that's it .
Speaker 1So literally , that name came like that when I was getting ready to self-publish on Amazon and so , yeah , oh , I love that and we're going to talk more about that as it correlates to taking leaps .
Speaker 2But tell us you've done quite a few leaps . You've moved recently and you've done transitions . You're kind of to me more of a builder , where you are transitioning out of something temporarily . You go back to it . So just tell us a little bit about the recent move to be with your family and when you were in the career full-time .
Speaker 1Well , that came accidental . I had no intentions of coming home . So , really , the transition , actually , if I could go back to 2021 , that's kind of when it really started . Well , even before then , god had transitioned me to seminary and I did that for about a year and a half and then I was like God , I just really need a break , like my spirit was tired . I was again in the midst of a big leap , taking all these little leaps in between , and I was like God , I just need a rest , I'm tired , and you know , when God does give you rest , he'll give it to you . But you're also going to be working too . It's not just a full , full rest , you're going to be doing some work too . And so , through that again , I went home .
Speaker 1I'm originally from New Jersey , I'm in Cincinnati , ohio , right now , and that leap was when I was taking care of a loved one . So when I was listening , when I was reading all of them , I said that one was that season , and so I actually had left full-time teaching to go to seminary and then to go home and be with my parents , and that was a journey in itself . But then God was like okay , I want you to go back to North Carolina where I was living . I said , okay , so this is another leap . So I took that leap , and that's when he was like I want you to go back to teaching . I said go back to teaching . What do you mean ? Go back to teaching , like he was like I want you to go back to Durham . I said , god , I had been in Durham like two and a half years , like , and so he called me to go back , and that was extremely difficult I'm not about to hear a lie , because I always say that , like , my heart was to do my ministries and what I wanted to do . But then God was pulling my heart in another way where it's like no , I'm calling you to go back .
Speaker 1In this season I was so torn , I was unhappy , I was complaining every day , and that's not the heart pressure that I wanted to be in . I wanted to be gratitude and thankfulness that I have a job . And I took again this leap to like , leave a different state with nothing but things in my car I can speak on that later and it was really really difficult because , like , that calling was pulling me , but then he was pulling me in another direction . So that was that one . And then he said , okay , you don't go back to this one , I'm going to call you to work on . I do self-publishing and stuff like that . It's really cool once you learn how to publish a book on Amazon , now you can help other people do it . And so he was like , okay , don't go back there . And I'm like , okay , don't go back there . Well , what am I going to do ? So I worked on my nonprofit stuff and that's when I was here again this time last year around Christmas .
Speaker 1He was like I want you to go back to teaching . I said , okay , jesus , you're doing , you are doing way too much . It's back and forth and all of that , but that's sometimes what a leap is . Like he'll have you leap and then like , sometimes , like you'll stay for a minute where everybody's calling you , but then it's like , okay , it's time to take another one , and that one can be big , that one can be small , but all leaps you know , I feel are very significant . And so I went back to full-time teaching .
Speaker 1But I was praying . I said , god , please let this be the last time . Like I'm so ready , like I'm so ready to just dive in . I want to no , back to school . And I'm like God , why isn't this happening ? But I didn't , and I would say this time I had a much more different posture than I was back in 2022 . This was just this past couple of months ago , 2023 . And so , yeah , if I can speak onto that one , that was difficult because I didn't want to . I did not want to . I was literally like David pleading the Psalms , like how long Lord ? That's literally how I felt always . Like Like David pleaded in the Psalms , like how long Lord , like that's literally how I felt always . Like Lord , how long am I going to be , how long are you going to keep me in teaching ? But then , finally , it's almost like you have those finally moments where it's like , okay , I'm with my mom , I really don't feel called , I'm supposed to work full time .
Speaker 2I really feel like where I'm at now is just where he's going to place me and that is perfectly full-time ministry . Yeah , yeah , that's so good . I think you really hit on something where it's that waiting season and that how long am I going to have to be in this place where I'm unhappy and I'm not content , and I know that there's so much more that you've called me to do that I'm passionate about . But I also think that leads us to the topic of doing things in his strength , because there was probably a strengthening that was going on within you . So tell us a little bit about what that looked like for you during that season .
Speaker 1Yeah , Well , it didn't come easy . It took a lot of pruning and pressing and really actually being in pretty difficult situations , I didn't realize I had the gift of faith until someone pointed it out . She was like , yeah , you have a gift of faith . I was like I do . I just thought it was being obedient . That happened to me recently and I'm thinking in my head this is just the normal , like people just take these like leaps of faith and like you know , and this is just normal . But I'm like it's actually not and I realized that , oh , this is a gift that God has cultivated in me .
Speaker 1So , with that strength in him , it really started back in 2018 , 2019 , when God told me I want you to go to seminary . God
confirmed it . But I think that was when his strength in me was really really brewing in me . Like I didn't know that I had to move out of my apartment and I didn't know I didn't have full-time job , but all these things that he was calling me to have a deeper trust in him . And so I would say like , through all those moments where I had his strength in me , like it was developing a deeper trust in him and in his name and who he is , because that's a big thing for me . I am the type of person where it's like if you're going to say something , I need you to do it . I don't like broken promises , I don't like when people are flaky , I just don't like that . And so for me , in my mind , I had to get out of . Like Christina , god is not like that . He's sovereign , he's faithful , he's all these things . So if he's calling you to have a deeper strength in him and take these miraculous leaps that you never thought you would , he's calling you to have a deeper trust in who he is . And so that's what I learned .
Speaker 1And really , if I can speak to my devotional again , it really came from accident . Like I didn't realize that God was going to give me the title literally as soon as I was about to , about to publish it , and that was a whole strength in itself , because I didn't realize that when it says self-publishing , yeah , that's what it is Like . You're doing it by yourself , right , right , you're doing it by yourself . You have people to help you , but goodness gracious . And so , and I didn't realize writing those devotionals it's 40 days , I needed them myself and I was like these are too good , these are blessing me .
Speaker 1I know they're going to bless somebody else and so , just in his strength , I've learned in this journey , with taking leaps and just having a walk of faith and waiting on him , that , like you really will mount on wings , like when the scripture says Isaiah , like you will mount upon wings , you will really soar like an eagle , because there's something in you that he wants to birth out of you and through you . And really I've learned it's actually like people actually are like literally watching me , like they're watching my life and they're watching like , wow , she's so strong in the Lord , like , wow , like she's like obeying God , like I want that and it's just like , well , yeah , I do want you to want that , but also it's just a gift that he's given you . So I would speak to that with strength , because it is not easy , but the fruit that he's producing in you , it's going to be so worth it .
Speaker 2Yeah , and even I'm sure you've realized that , as you've done one thing to the next thing , he's called you . You're stronger with each one because of how he has shown himself and revealed himself in the last situation , and so the strength of God is something , that he is strong , but we come into a deeper knowledge of his strength each time we choose to obey and step into what he's called us to do . I want to go back to that back and forth season a little bit , where you were jumping here , there , because I know that there are so many people who have felt like , okay , I thought that this is what I was supposed to do , or I thought that did you ever feel that way ? Like , did I hear you wrong ? Did I think and that's that's part of the reason that this build-a-leap exists , because I don't want people to feel that way , but let's acknowledge the fact that you were moving your whole life back and forth . So what was kind of going on during that time for you ?
Speaker 1No , it's completely true and I'm glad you're doing it , because it's like sometimes I question , like did I hear from you ? So when I was at home in 2021 , I did not believe that God told me you need to go back to Raleigh . I was in my quiet time , I was praying . He said you need to go back to Raleigh . I said , excuse me , go go back where , go back who ? To Raleigh ? Like no , like I was not going to take that leap by myself . Like I had to drive seven , eight , eight , nine hours by myself with no money on top of that . It's like everything that could have happened with haywire in that moment . But he was like I need you to go back , cause I was like God , I don't have any money , like what am I going to do ? And so he was like you need to go back , and so that back and forth really really test your faith . It really tests your faith to know that and I'm confident enough to know that I did hear God , cause I had a friend tell me . She was like you need to go back and I'm like you're crazy . I was like you're absolutely crazy , I'm not going back . Like you are insane . Like I literally told that to her face , I said you're crazy , I'm not going back .
Speaker 1But it showed me that , like one , you do hear his voice and you have to also like be confident in yourself and trust yourself . We don't trust you know trust in our flesh , but we trust in who he is and who God is . But you also do have to be like I heard God , like I heard him so so clearly to know that , okay , this is another transition . Lord , I already been through 10 transitions already . So , like the fact that each time that you have landed me on a soft ground , like Psalm 40 , I love that Psalm so much , I go back to that Psalm over and over I waited patiently on the Lord and how God lifted David out of the slimy pit Like sometimes that's really how I felt , because I needed him to have me placed on a solid rock , to know that I heard his voice , to know that like , hey , I already been through these before , but I know God because I've heard , heard your voice , that you're not going to fail me this time and you will never fail me .
Speaker 1So that's what I would speak into that with that back and forth
. And it's difficult because my life looks so . It looks crazy from the outside , but I know that God is doing something not within me , well , within me and around me , and so I have to know that I'm following the Lord as much as I value other people . I'm following the call that he has on me . So that's how I would say that .
Speaker 2That right there is so good , because I do think that the trap of how this could look unstable can cause us to walk in disobedience because it's like okay , I'm all over the place and we're listening to what the world says and what other people say we should have . You should have one career , you should live in one town , you should raise your kids in one house , you have all of these things , and God is like but , yeah , no , not in my world . The leaping lifestyle is the lifestyle that we lead until we make it to heaven . It is the lifestyle that we are called to live until we make it to heaven . It is not a one and done thing . He's always going to call us out of the comfort zone .
Speaker 2The example that you are giving is that very thing , and it looks easy for those of us that have the gift of faith which someone told me that recently too , and I'm like is it though ? I was like , but it was cultivated in a lack of faith . Which someone told me that recently , too , and I'm like is it though ? I was like , but it was cultivated in a lack of faith . It was cultivated in moments where people told me , ye , of little faith , and him walking me through how often he said ye of little faith to people . Why does he say that ? Because he wants faith to grow . But you know , I love hearing how you you allowed yourself to lean into each moment to silence the noise around you maybe not immediately , but eventually and to continue to say I am called to live a leaping lifestyle . You know , there's a lot of people in the bible that we see that went from place to place to place .
Speaker 1And it was normal , it was normal for them .
Speaker 2My God , Abraham that's my dude Come on Like all over . You know to do these different things and to go into these different places and minister the word , but yet we have this belief system that that is not us , that we are not called to different places and different seasons of life . You know , we may always be called to work with this one job , but in that one job we may be called to different areas of influence , and that's a leap . So I love , as you're sharing the story , I do want to ask the leap to taking care of your family . That's a hard one to make because it's a huge sacrifice . Tell us how that came about and what strength did you see God building in that time ?
Speaker 1Well , that came on accident Again . All of these situations , they came on accident , I'm not even kidding . So , end of 2020 , I was like man , I just want to go home . I just need a break . I done been through this journey , I done lived with people , I'm used to living on my own and I'm like Jesus too much . I just need to go home , I just need a break . So , actually , 2021 , that's actually when my dad got sick and actually it would be a year . Sunday I passed one year and thank you , and so that was accidental .
Speaker 1And you know I'm thinking in my mind . You know how we think in our mind . We perceive in our mind of when and how things are going to go . Our timeline , yeah , I don't even plan with God anymore . My friends know Christina does not plan with God Because you know Christina's feelings are going to get hurt Because it doesn't go her way . I mean , I don't plan and I can't plan my life , because if I surrender my life to Christ , well , I wouldn't need him , like I wouldn't need him , I wouldn't need him . And so , yeah , that's when my dad actually got sick .
Speaker 1That's when things started going downhill and I'm thinking , oh yeah , I'll be there two , three months , I'll be in New Jersey two , three months and I'll go back to North Carolina to live my life . And God was like no , you're going to be there for the entire year , I'm going to be there for the entire year . Jesus , what ? And so when God gave me an image about how and it , it really just it . We don't , we don't know what he's doing behind the scenes , we have no idea , and that's what he truly showed me . So , like , unfortunately , my dad was blind , he can't see . I mean , he could , like walk around the house cause he's , you know , very familiar with our house , but he couldn't cook , couldn't drive , couldn't do anything . And so sometimes , when he's like sleeping , or sometimes when he's listening to music and like , I know that , like , okay , he wants a snack , or you know it's time for him to eat , I would go ahead and already prepare his lunch . And so he didn't know that I was already going ahead and preparing what he , what he wanted , and so that when it showed up , he was like , oh , I have lunch . And so I realized that , with God , like God gave me that revelation it's like , christina , I'm preparing things behind the scenes that you really don't know , just like you're taking care of your father right now , in this moment , and my mom too , but mostly my dad . That's really why God had me there , because he knew that a year and a half later he would pass away . And so what really really struck me was like was I'm doing things behind the scenes , christina , that you have no idea ? You just have to trust me to know that I'm preparing this for you , just like how you prepared things for your dad , and he didn't even know . I'm doing the same thing for you , because I know you love your dad . But how much more do I love you ? That was one thing he really really taught me in that year with taking care of parents and really cherishing that moment too , because you know , unfortunately , I would never get it back .
Speaker 1But and I did not realize that , god , why are you having me at home ? I'm not . I'm not understanding , but in the blessing of that , I was able to build my nonprofit same time , and then God is calling me to have to do another business . So literally , I went to work , and so I call it . I call it working by faith . I went downstairs , at my dining room table , I had everything I needed and I went to work for that day because I wanted to prove God and show God that like , okay , you're giving me all this time home , it's for a reason , like there's no time ever wasted in the kingdom . If I'm at home , if you're calling me somewhere or a specific job , there's , there's a reason to it . And so I really wanted to make sure that I not only I didn't quote unquote waste that time , but like , okay , there's stuff that I could be doing right now , there's stuff that could be building , and financially it was .
Speaker 1It was extremely rough because God didn't call me to work quote unquote nine to five , when I was at home , because my primary you know reason I was there was taking care of my family or my parents , and that was difficult in itself because I had to trust God . I remember one time I was late on a credit card bill and I was like you know what I'm going to surrender , lord , if my credit score goes low , if I go into overdraft , anything could happen . Lord , I'm going to surrender it to you . I'm going to surrender these finances to you because if you're calling me home , obviously you're going to provide . I kid you not . I left my phone somewhere , I think , in my room . I went downstairs , went back upstairs , someone gave me a cash app .
Speaker 2Wow , yeah , listen , I'm telling you , that is how I have consistently seen God work , and he's had to remind me recently don't just surrender the situation , surrender the outcome . Yes , and that's what you did . You were like , whatever happens , god , I'm going to trust you see , and I am all the so many times I'll say like Lord , you see this ? Okay , so I know that you see it . I'm going to bring it to your attention . But I also know that you see this situation and so I'm going to surrender the situation . But also , in this season , I'm learning to surrender the outcome , because it's so easy for us to want to manipulate the outcome and manipulate our prayers to accommodate the outcome that we would like to see happen , and it's really like no God , I surrender this situation , I surrender the outcome and I pray your will be done . Yes , that is our prayer , that is our hope . So , okay , as we get ready to wrap up the conversation , this has been so good .
Speaker 2And I'm encouraged that the strength of God is made perfect in our weakness and even in those moments where it seems like , because the leaps weren't perfect and even you , navigating within it , it was still . You're still processing it and I think people think that you're going to get to this point where you arrive , but you're not Until we get to heaven .
Speaker 1That's our arrival , right , that's it .
Speaker 2Each leap will require its next level of faith , its next level of trust , its next level of whatever that might be . So I want to ask you , as you are thinking about what your next leap is , I also want to ask you what do you think he is going to strengthen in you within that leap ?
Speaker 1My next leap . I've actually I learned this this year God normally speaks , he speaks to all of us , yeah , and he's been silent this year , very different from past years and past seasons , from walking with him , but he's been silent and normally , when we think that you know when God has said it's a bad thing , but I've noticed that , like when God is silent , I think that's a leap that I'm in and I think he's still going to walk me through that , like his silence is still sovereign , like his silence is good , like it's okay , like even right now , like God knows , like okay , I have a specific situation that , like God , needs to happen , like when you're going to come through Jesus . But I know when he's silent , I know he's working , he's working something out and I have to trust that , like he will always speak . You know , read his word every day , sometimes audibly , sometimes my spirit , sometimes other people , and even recently it hasn't been like that . I even asked God today , this one of my quiet time . I said , god , normally you repeat , like when he speaks to me twice , I know that it's him , he doesn't . You know . One time Okay , but two times Okay , I know it's three times . It's like okay , you really better pay attention . And I literally asked him today . I said , god , like is there anything that you've spoken twice about that I need that , I need to know , like , where in my life have you spoken that I need to pay attention to ?
Speaker 1So I would say that's a leap right now , because sometimes I feel I know for me , like I always want God to speak , I always want God to speak , and he does , and he speaks through his word and he speaks with people , but sometimes just the silence of him , knowing that , like I'm going to work , I don't sleep and I don't slumber , like that's a good thing , christine , like rest in that silence and know that he's going to come through because you're his child and so , and also too , I think a constant leap for me is knowing that , like I'm faithful , I'm faithful Cause you know , sometimes I'm not going to lie . Sometimes I'm like , okay , lord , you did it once . Like are you truly going to do it again ? But like that goes against his nature and character , he's always going to do it again . So I would say that's probably the leap that I'm
taking .
Speaker 1Next , it's like just really embracing his silence and knowing that even my 30th birthday I turned 30 this year I told God . I said , god , I want you to surprise me , which is not my nature and character at all . I don't know what happened in 2023 this year , but I've never told God in my life that I wanted him to surprise me , and he did . I had best friends . They threw me a 30th birthday dinner . So even just in that the silence of not planning , the silence of not doing anything I didn't know what I wanted to do and I again surrendered . I surrendered that to him . So I would say that's the leap that I'm in now , just embracing his silence .
Speaker 2Yeah , that's so good and I love it . And one thing I've learned about is silence is leaning into that , and I've also learned that sometimes that's an invitation to go deeper , you know , and explore that deeper thing . I literally just came out of that season where I'm like hello , anybody there and and you know I was I went to church and I'm like expecting it to be the thing that took me to the next thing , like okay , I'm going to it to be the thing that took me to the next thing , like okay , I'm going to fill it here . He was like no , and I spent a week where I just spent like an hour or two in his presence . I was listening to worship , I was listening to sermons , I was taking notes .
Speaker 2And when I went to church the next week , not only could I hear him better , but I felt his presence more and I remember him saying see , it wasn't that they were off , but your expectation to experience me . There was not what it needed to be . You needed to experience me at home so that you could carry me into there . And so the silence made me lean in and say God , where are you Exactly ? And search Exactly . Yeah , it allowed me to lean in and really search for God and him answer . So I love what you said , because there are definitely those seasons where , like , silence can equal surprises , and I'm the same .
Speaker 2I don't like surprises Do not come up in here with a big old surprise balloon . Please don't do that .
Speaker 1I don't . And you know , if you're going to surprise me , please for the love , you know what I like . Yes , If you're going to surprise me , get something that .
Speaker 2I'm going to enjoy so that I react , so it's not a double disappointment , that's all I'm saying . Thank you , because I'm like one .
Speaker 1You didn't get me what I wanted and you're trying to surprise me ?
Speaker 2Yeah , I'm just saying , but I love that . That is a huge leap and it's the surprise and it's the invitation and it's all the things Okay . So , as we wrap up , please tell me , or tell my listeners , where can they find you ?
Speaker 1How can they connect with you ? Where can they get the devotional ? Devotional is on Amazon , I believe . If you just type in Strengthen Him , there's a subtitle called Daily Divas with Christina , because that's what it was . It was Daily Devotionals . You can find that on Amazon , and I am ChristinaReneeXO on Instagram and then ChristinaReneeYs , so I don't really go by my last name , but I'm on Facebook . But primarily I found myself being more on Instagram .
Speaker 2All right . Well , thank you again , Christina
, for joining us . This has been a great conversation and I really enjoy just your perspective and what God has shown you with having strengthened him .
Speaker 1Thank you , I enjoyed it .
Speaker 2Thank you for joining today's episode . I hope you were inspired by what you heard and you're even more encouraged to trust God with your next leap . Before you leave , take a moment and think of your community . Who do you know that could benefit from the wisdom shared in this podcast ? Now take it one step further and encourage them through text , dm or a simple conversation . By sharing this episode , let's make sure others know they're not alone as they obey God and choose to live a leaping lifestyle . Enjoy the rest of your day and remember God can do more with your willingness than he could ever do with your worthiness .