3SchemeQueens
Each week, hosts Kait, Colleen, and Megan take you down the rabbit hole of a brand-new conspiracy theory or mystery. From shadowy cover-ups and unexplained events to viral internet rabbit holes, they bring the tea, the facts, and the tinfoil crowns. Join the conversation, laugh along with them, and question everything. When it’s all over, they’ll tell you what they think and they’ll try to prove it to you. So grab a drink, hit follow, and tune in every Tuesday for a new episode.
3SchemeQueens
RE-RELEASE: Birds Aren't Real
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**Discussion begins at 11:45**
Have you ever seen a bunch of birds lined up on a power line? Or had a bird poop on your car? What if I told you that birds were really drones that the US government was using to spy on us? That those birds lined up on a power line were just recharging? That birds defecating were really a way for the Government to track them? Theorists claim that the federal government exterminated 12 billion birds between 1959-1971 and replaced them with drones. Another 4 billion have been exterminated since then. In fact, some theorists believe that JFKs assassination was actually a result of him refusing to kill the birds.
Theme song by INDA
Hey, it's Colleen. Hi, it's Kate. And it's Megan. And we're the three skiing queens. Join us as we discuss popular hoaxes and give you our comedic take on what is fact and what is fiction. If you have a sense of humor and an open mind, come take this journey with us. We'll tell you what we think and we'll try to prove it to you. Hey guys. Hey guys. How's it going? Welcome. Okay, it's Colleen's pick this morning. We're still in Egypt. We're about to head to the airport, and I cannot wait to tell you all about the pyramids. What we learned. I got well, I can't tell you. I can't wait to tell you about my flight anxiety. It's a long flight, isn't it?
SPEAKER_01Very nervous about it. But you know what? Kate booked the right flight this time.
SPEAKER_03I did. Megan did it for me. Last time we traveled, Kate I I booked the wrong flight.
SPEAKER_01Kate was eight hours after us. You weren't anxious though. You were drunk. Yeah. I and I was like anxious for Kate. Yeah. And we got her on standby and it was all good. Yeah. And I got on the I got on the plane with you guys. She was like, it this girl who has traveling anxiety was going to just sit in the Dallas airport for eight hours. And she was like, it's fine. It's cool. And I was like, See, it is not fine.
SPEAKER_03I think once I'm through security, I'm fine. I live my life. You always feel like you are gonna get arrested for like smuggling something that you didn't actually I tend to get pulled because I accidentally forget like I have like a pocket knife in my bed. One was kind of sad. One was from Timmy. Well, because they didn't like me being in DC. Oh they were like for well, one was actually a really actually kind of a big thing.
SPEAKER_01I'm sorry, your family was pranking you by putting knives in your bag.
SPEAKER_03I don't know. I had a pocket knife in my naked bat makeup bag, and it that's what I get pulled over for a lot. Not pulled over. Kind of. Yeah, that's kind of like it's a walking pullover.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, pullover. I think I'm actually security. I'm the meme that's like You're ready to go. You feel like it's shoes are off. It's a test and you're gonna win it. Like, can you make it through the quickest and most efficiently? But going through customs, I 100% think about every law that I broke that I did not break. Like I'm like, I don't know. Am I gonna sit for murder? Am I smuggling drugs I don't know about? You know, they're like, they're like, what business or pleasure? I don't I don't know. I don't remember why I'm here. Where am I going? Where am I staying? I don't know. When am I coming back?
SPEAKER_03That's so funny. I am I am the opposite in the security lane because I I have this irrational fear about losing my ticket. But everybody roasts me about getting yeah, everybody roasts me about having a paper ticket. But that's like my fear, and then I'm gonna lose my paper ticket and my license. So I can't I like always I'm like trying to take off my shoes, and but I'm like, don't forget where you put your paper ticket. Oh my god. Well now it's virtual. But my new fear is that I'm actually only gonna forget my passport expired and like go in confidently and then like not be able to get through securely. That's that would be terrifying, yeah. Yeah, I this is why I need to fly with just like Megan or Bourbon Boy, because they just do it for me.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, you just hand it over.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_01But uh some not our state, but some states now, you don't even have to have your ID. It's like a what? Loop to your wallet on your phone. Oh, your real ID. Yeah, I can connect to it now. So you don't even need to you don't have to worry about losing your driver's license. Oh my gosh.
SPEAKER_03It's gonna be the new way to travel. Passports are gonna be. I need a real ID. Anyways, it's my week. I'm gonna pick my episode. Okay, what is it? Uh, it wasn't what I did. But it was a good episode. I think Megan's Megan's uh like she's she's holding the record.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. I did birds aren't real?
SPEAKER_03Yeah, you did it.
SPEAKER_01I'm gonna have to listen together because for sure, in my memory, you did it because it was my theory about birds aren't real.
SPEAKER_02No, I th I 90%.
SPEAKER_01No, you're right. Yeah. Because I just remember you were talking about how like every time you explain. I was talking about the vine. Before the podcast, like you were calling me like birds aren't real, look it up. Yeah, look it up. Look it up. They work for the birds.
SPEAKER_03They work for the bourgeoisie.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_02The birds work for the bourgeoisie.
SPEAKER_01But I had to come in and be like, bad news for you. Yeah, it was fail.
SPEAKER_03Well, spoiler alert, if you're gonna watch the episode, we find out that it was actually a prank the entire time. And that's probably why I liked the episode so much. Yeah. It's so good. It was like this kid just fooling everybody online. Well, I think I is I think it's actually an appropriate episode for you. Yeah. To like because he was just trying to diffuse a dispute. Yeah. And like that is you. Like, you just want to do me. Yeah. Be in the world. I don't like conflict. Um, I also like that it was viral on TikTok. I liked that it was just a bit for people online and it drove the older population crazy on Facebook. Um I thought that was just so funny.
SPEAKER_02And I thought Megan did a good job. So that's why I'm just gonna do it.
SPEAKER_01I'm not even doing that one, but I appreciate you. Um yeah, I will say if you if you are an active listener, like you know, uh like a dedicated fan, but you chose to skip that one because just the title, like you just get too far out there. Right, listen. Give it a listen. It's a nice light-hearted episode.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, it's fun.
SPEAKER_01So enjoy this episode, and we'll see you next week. See you next week. Hoot hoot. Welcome. Tweet tweet. We got a struggling Colleen here today. She's a little hung of the over. She just got back from the beach. She got back from secrets party with a bunch of middle-aged people.
SPEAKER_03Secrets, if you know, you know. I think you know, I don't know. I don't know secrets. I know. It's crazy. There's so many rooms.
SPEAKER_01And then it's like a big, massive beach club at Ocean City. It's so much fun. It grosses me out during the day because there's like um you can be in the ocean, but they have like high tops. And everybody's just pissing. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02They had um, it's like uh twisted tea, but it's a different brand. Hoop tea on tap. That's like the preferred drink. But um, and then when I was there, there was a reggae band, which made me laugh. And then reggae.
SPEAKER_03That was one stage. And then there was a whole other stage, and that was like a rock band stage. And there were so many bars.
SPEAKER_01Hoop tea is made with vodka, black tea, raspberry, and lemon, and it's made in Ocean City. It's made in the ocean city sunshine. So I guess it's like a it definitely was sweeter, so that makes sense with the berry.
SPEAKER_03I swore that it was bubbly, and Jordan said it wasn't bubbly, and I was I was ready to really fight her on that. I was like, I can feel the bubbles on my tongue. Maybe if it's made in the sun, it has a little fermentation. I don't know. You get that like it's like calling it because it came from the tap.
SPEAKER_01Also, is it really made in the sun? I can't believe that they're really doing vats of sun tea. I know, and I don't know if it would have been.
SPEAKER_03Kombucha is fermented tea, so and that's where it gets its bubbles. Yeah, and I swear to god, it tasted bubbly to me, but Jordan was like, No, it's not. And I was like, You're not feeling my tongue.
SPEAKER_01Well, we have a fun episode today. I feel like it's it's a hoot. It is a hoot. I told um I just saw uh Drew and Jamie, who have been shouted out so many times on this podcast. Yep, but I was telling Drew that I was meeting up with you guys to record uh about birds. Birds. And he was dying. I was like, it's really been a Drew month because we talked about cheese. Oh yeah, talking about birds. Um and we talked about planes. He loves to talk about automobiles. And one day Jamie said, Drew, enough about the automobiles. We don't care. And so funny. And then he started talking about the planes he was seeing. Yeah. And we were like, Drew, planes are just automobiles of the sky. Stop talking about them. So we talked about cheese a couple weeks ago. We did Boeing airplanes last week, and this week we're doing birds, and Drew was a big bird watcher.
SPEAKER_03So if Jamie is being frowned, what's Drew? Cheese. Birdman. Birdman. I like Birdman. Birdman's funny. It kind of rolls off the tongue. Yeah. It sounds like Mothman. Okay. Oh, Mothman. We're gonna do that one day.
SPEAKER_01Guys, we watched mountain monsters.
SPEAKER_03That's definitely a recommendation. I was so involved. I like was like it's guys. Guys, it is such a funny show. Watch it. Watch it. It's just a group of Appalachian men thinking they're hunting monsters.
SPEAKER_01But we're gonna cover, like I told you before, that Lindsay, my friend who grew up hunting Sasquatch, she's gonna um tune in with us from Vegas to do a Sasquatch episode. Hopefully, we'll get her mom on because her mom has had multiple experiences. Um yeah, Mothman. I think they That's for West Virginia. Yeah, we'll do that at some point as well. Um, just a reminder, guys, don't forget to check out our Facebook and Instagram pages at Three Scheme Queens, the number three scheme queens, all one word. If you want to check out our website, go to threschemqueens.com and you can find links to our social media accounts, our buzz route page, all of our episodes, additional content, and our contact page. Let us know how we're doing and what you want to hear next. There's also opportunities to financially support us. There are links to buy some cup of coffee, links to our merch store, and Amazon affiliate links. And as always, if you choose not to financially support us, we appreciate the follows, the downloads, the listens, the likes, and be sure to check us out on Reddit as well. Uh Kate, what should the people do?
SPEAKER_03Uh yeah, scroll on down, leave us a five-star review, leave us a comment, share the pod with your friends and family, share us on the Instagrams, um, write us an email. Colleen will read it in a funny accent. Oh, yeah. And yeah.
SPEAKER_02If you request a certain accent, I'll try my best. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01So is it time for our drink chat? Drink chat.
SPEAKER_03What you guys drinking? Oi, might. I've got me uh a smashing beaker of a drink. Really flapping uh Gatorade. I was waiting for like, what is she gonna do?
SPEAKER_01It'll it's like the sugar water that you would put in your hummingbird feeder. Yeah. But it's got electrolytes to bring you back to life.
SPEAKER_03Hey, what are you drinking? I am drinking a little J-La Shawnee. Um we like J-Lore.
SPEAKER_01We do like J-Lore. Have we we may have had J-Lore out in the past. Is that true?
SPEAKER_03Yeah, we've had J L. Well, we've had J Lore together, but I don't like that.
SPEAKER_01I don't know if it's but if it's made an appearance on the podcast.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I don't know.
SPEAKER_01I just appreciate any time Kate will drink white wine with me.
SPEAKER_03My mom really likes J-Lore cab. It's good. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, you don't like the cab? Oh, I hate cab. I love red wine.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Remember that one Christmas party that um Kate was dancing and drinking red wine and I was just going behind her. Yeah, I was just going behind her with the paper towels on the hardwood floors.
SPEAKER_03Quite a good friend. What a friend. And then I kept calling her Caitlin. Kaitolyn. Kaitelin. Three syllables. Uh guys, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Today, shall we get into it? Yeah. What are we talking about, Megan? We're talking about birds.
SPEAKER_04Tweet-een-e-ee, doet-ee-ee, tweet-ee-did-ee, do-do, tweet. Who's there? All the little birds on J Bird Street. Love to hear Colleen go tweet. Tweet, tweet.
SPEAKER_01All right, guys, for this intro, I took a page out of Colleen's book. Oh. Have you ever seen a bird? Have you ever seen a bunch of birds lined up on a power line? Yes.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, Megan.
SPEAKER_01Have you ever had a bird hoop on your car? Yes. What if I told you that birds were really drones that the US government was using to spy on us and that those birds lined up on a power line? We're just recharging. Oh. What if I told you that birds defecating were really a way for the government to track them? Oh, I believe that. What? Theorists claim that Harry Truman implemented the Bird Drone Initiative in an effort to prevent another world war. Wait. I'm immediately believing this. The federal government exterminated 12 billion birds between 1959 and 1971 and then replaced them with drones. Yep. Another four billion have been exterminated since then. In fact, some theorists believe that JFK's assassination was actually a result of him refusing to kill more birds. Oh my gosh. Why didn't he just go along with the birds?
SPEAKER_02You know, birds freak me out for many reasons.
SPEAKER_03Okay. First of all, why can they fly? You know what I mean? Physics. They're not mammals. But what are they? Birds. They have they have their own category. And also, why are they the direct cousin of a dinosaur? They, okay. I was on the phone. I was on the phone with Colleen the other day. Okay. And there was this Oh, the monster creature. Yes. It was like it looked like a miniature raptor. It's a turkey vulture. And he was running so fast. It was so scary. It was terrifying. Did we look up turkey vultures? No, we didn't. I didn't think they could run. I just watched him run. And also, are penguins birds? Penguins are birds. They don't fly. Don't penguins mate for life? Yes. It's so sweet.
SPEAKER_01Not all birds can be. Swans also mate for life. Yeah. Well you hear about the swans that my parents like. I know. They um there were a couple there were a couple women and one man, and the women got into a fight over the man, and one of the women didn't make it. The swans? Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Oh, I thought you meant like actual women. Well, the females. Good team. Um, yeah, so yeah, don't trust birds. There's too many of them for them not to be eyes.
SPEAKER_02But before we even get into the nitty-gritty of what you have to tell us, my immediate thought process is that it's only certain birds.
SPEAKER_03That's my that's my immediate thought process. Um like I pigeons? Yeah. You know, I'm gonna be honest. This is not this is not a conspiracy theory, I believe.
SPEAKER_01I I'm more obviously shocker more with Kate. I don't really buy into this. I do think um I don't think they're drones. I think birds trained. There are a couple of like a three-eyed raven. Yeah. I think that there might be a couple drones out there that look like birds, but in general, I think birds are birds. Well, could be smart to do that. So let me tell you the story, okay? Right. Peter Mackendau is the public information officer for the birds aren't real movement. He claims that the group started in 1976 when animal rights activists and anti-surveillance activists learned about the government plot to replace all of the birds with drones to spy on citizens. He alleges that the government dropped poisonous toxins from airplanes, uh, chemtrails, anyone? Uh, with the intent to murder all of the birds. I mean, have you ever seen a baby pigeon? No. No, we don't see baby pigeons. Oh my god. Because the drones are all adults. They're all adult pigeons. They just come out as adults. Wait. I've never seen a baby pigeon.
SPEAKER_03This is what Mackendow claims. I've never seen a baby pigeon. Racking my brain right now thinking about baby pigeons. I've never seen one. But I'm gonna be honest, I don't think I've ever seen a baby pigeon. But what if they don't flew the nest?
SPEAKER_01Flew the nest flew the nest? Is it?
SPEAKER_03I've never even seen a teenage pigeon, though. Fly the nest? I thought it was flu. Flu's past tense. Flock? The nest? Well, flock would be a lot of birds. Fly the nest? Yeah. I don't know. Anyway.
SPEAKER_01Well, you say like he flew the nest, meaning like he left.
SPEAKER_03Oh, maybe that's what I'm thinking of. Well, maybe they don't f leave the nest.
SPEAKER_01Maybe one flew over the nest. One flew over the they they they don't they're dependent on their parents until they're big enough.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, like maybe they they mature until they're in an adult body. And that's I mean, how many baby birds do you really see anyway?
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Just the ones that are that when you find like a fun little bird. Yeah, I love the bird nests. So um over the gr over the years, uh, this group, the birds aren't real movement, uh has protested at CNN for their coverage of the movement, as well as Twitter for their logo. In 2022, 3,000 people gathered in Washington Square to bring publicity to the movement. And guess what? There were pigeons everywhere. Of course there were. It where was it? In New York City. Yeah, there's pigeons everywhere to begin with. In an interview about the gathering, he told NPR, I'm hoping you know my grandchildren will be living in a world where being a bird truther is the norm, where it's weird if you believe in birds. So that's the world I'm working toward. Bird truther. I love that. All right, guess what, guys? What are this is all an elaborate piece of performance art. What? Peter Mackendau was in Memphis, Tennessee in 2016. I think he said he like his girlfriend had just broken up to broken up with him and he was like a hot mess. And uh this was like uh when we had like the women's marches. Oh, yeah, yeah. Uh so he came across this women's march and he said he was watching this chaos as these protesters and counter-protesters just like shouting nonsense at each other. And he told New York Times, I thought about how funny a skit would be if someone had a sign at a rally that had nothing to do with the rally, thinking of an archetype of a character that would be just as energetically representing his beliefs, but they just meant nothing. Like it just meant just pointing to something absurd. And so I ended up finding a poster on a wall for an event that had already passed, and the back of the poster was just white. So I took the poster off the wall and just wrote the three most random words I could think of, which were birds aren't real. They didn't mean anything at the time. The start of the bird. Yeah, birds aren't real. This is so funny. They didn't mean anything at the time, it was just three random words. Then I picked up the sign and started marching around with the people. So when he's doing this, this woman films him and posts a clip on social media with him, and he's chanting, there's a birdemic happening. Birds are a myth, they're an illusion, they're a lie, wake up America. And so she posts it to social media and it just like blows up. I'm woke. So he creates his social media account and starts selling merchandise with sayings like bird watching goes both ways, or if it flies, it lies. Uh he was actually a college student when this happened. And in 2018, he dropped out of college to devote all of his time to this movement.
SPEAKER_03Oh my God.
SPEAKER_01He held rallies, like I mentioned, put up billboards and sent media fake evidence. Like he had this actor who claimed he was ex CIA, and he was like, I saw what was happening. Um they sent hundreds of fake emails from the Pentagon discussing, quote, poultry gate. Oh my God. And the movement was publicized on the news. So Mackindow says he's like sitting on his couch watching the news and they're covering this movement like it's real. And so he decided it was time to reveal that the whole thing was a farce. So in 2021, he did this front page interview with New York Times and he admitted to the whole thing. So previously he'd been interviewed, but he just always stayed in character. Oh yeah. Um, and so he says that like while this initially started to sort of like break up the tension that was happening, um, that then it kind of became this experiment in like how we get news now, right? Like what's fake news or whatever. Yeah, and like fake news and how like someone posts something on social media and they immediately take it as truth. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Um the bird conspiracy started on Vine. I swear I heard about it before I was in college.
SPEAKER_01So uh a little background on the founder. I love it. He grew up in Arkansas in a hyper-conservative religious community in Arkansas because his parents believed the school system was brainwashing children. Uh, he grew up in this oppressive environment before going to the University of Arkansas Fayetteville, uh, where he got to kind of expand his horizon. So he said that growing up in this environment, he has this like sense of empathy for a lot of the conspiracy-driven communities online. And he can see how it's like if you're just looking for a sense of community, you can find your people and then you like feed into it.
SPEAKER_03Right. Flat Earthers website was very well. I was about to say it's giving flat earth. Yeah. Like somebody suddenly, like, I'm we're just waiting for the for the flirters to be like, this is all an elaborate hoax.
SPEAKER_01Um, so he and he said he sees that with this movement that like students on college campuses started creating chapters of like, you know, birds aren't real. Uh and again, not that any of them actually believe birds aren't real, but that he thinks it was just like this, like it's a community, and it's like that's if that's what you're looking for. Here's a community.
SPEAKER_03Um that's what our podcast should have been called. Birds aren't real. Birds aren't real.
SPEAKER_01It's probably trademarked or something, though.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, that's true.
SPEAKER_01Uh, and he said, but it's kind of become a tool for counter-protesting. Like he said there was one comp one college that had there was like a protest going on, and it was like um pro-lifers, and they had these like really graphic images protesting. And then the school's group of birds aren't real people just showed up and started like protesting about birds not being real, and the whole thing just like dispersed. So it's like a peaceful counter-protest.
SPEAKER_03He's this uh he's a type nine.
SPEAKER_01Instead of like rage. He's definitely a type nine, yeah. Instead of arguing, I'm just gonna bring up another random topic that's strapped you. Um he says that when he started this movement, he was not trying to make fun of conspiracy theorists per se, but looking at like the absurdest beliefs that all people have. And he said that like some he said for the most part, people seem to get this was a joke, but some people would walk up to him, approach him in public, and kind of like go off on him, and that that like he's like when people would talk. To me with like disdain, I felt more like this that character I was playing. Like I would become angry and I was like emboldened. And even though I don't even believe this, like having someone come and attack my belief, believe, you know, quote belief, yeah, would like anger me. And like, yeah. And so he's like, so I can see how if you're a conspiracy, maybe a flirther and people are coming up and just like screaming at you about how you're wrong, it could make you like more of a flirther. Yeah, yeah. That makes sense.
SPEAKER_03Um, or if you're just a very stubborn person baseline, you tell me you could take it. You could take that to anything. Anybody you go up to someone and say, like, I you're not what you you know believe, and people are just gonna and they fight you.
SPEAKER_01I mean, like Kate, they're yeah, he'll be. Kate and I are friends for life, but we if we disagree, right, we're just like until Colleen keeps the peace. But right? Like we're both like neither one of us is gonna back down. No. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03I would like to say I think I back down before you do.
SPEAKER_01But you don't really back down. You do like a okay, okay, Megan, I'm backing down.
unknownYou know.
SPEAKER_01Um, but I also think that this whole thing like tracks with uh again, our current political climate in general. Like we're just screaming at each other and it's just like making people double down. Yeah, nobody's listening. Right. They're just getting stubborn. Yeah. It just so it perpetuates the cycle.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Uh he told NPR, what if by talking to conspiracy theorists like they're ignorant and stupid, we're actually pushing them further away from the truth that we want them to see? Because what happens when someone tells you that you're stupid, you're all wrong, you're the problem. You'll feel judged and dismissed. And most importantly, you'll feel othered, which may lead you to look for safety in those who are like-minded. And so that's going to affirm yourself, could give you a sense of identity and belonging by like joining these groups. So uh just like he's like this is basic Cuban desires and basic Cuban motivation. And I love that this was all just like a big social experiment.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Um he says that birds aren't real is not a shallow satire of conspiracy from the outside. Uh, it is from the deep inside. A lot of people, our generation, feel the lunacy in all this, and birds aren't real has been a way for people to express that. The movement hopes the joke will become a force for good by exposing all the ways misinformation thrives. Yes, we have it been intentionally spreading misinformation the past four years, but it's with a purpose. It's about holding up a mirror to America in the internet age. But interestingly, he recently did a follow-up with NPR, and he's like, the times have sort of grown around this idea. So as the years passed, birds aren't real fits more and more with things that are actually happening. So when he started this, he was like, What's the most absurd thing I can think of? Birds aren't real. Yeah. But he's like, but now here we are. I don't know, it's only like seven years later, and like maybe it's not outside of the realm of possibility. Yeah. Um, so rather than being the stuff of internet memes, there are actually engineers who are reverse engineering how birds fly to take what they learn and create bird-like drones. Oh my gosh. So let me tell you about a couple of the projects, and then I really want to hear what you guys think, especially Colleen, because I know she's got a lot of opinions about birds. I'm trying to find the the birds, the vine that I know birds. So let's start with project Aquiline. The CIA recently declassified documents describing this project that occurred during the Gol the Cold War. The goal was to have 12 bird-shaped drones that would be powered by nuclear energy and would stay aloft for up to a month, and they would just spy on the enemy and then like send that transmission back. Allegedly, they claim that like they investigated this, they tried to do this, it never came to fruition. But this was a CIA project. Do we believe it didn't happen? I don't know. Not really. I believe it probably happened. We'll find out in 50 years. In 50 years, will all this be declassified? Yeah. Declassified. She knows. She knows. Um, and then I think we talked about the pigeons and how like how you said you think Colleen thinks that pigeons are like the most likely. Yeah, easily.
SPEAKER_03Because they pigeons also have like the history of being used for spying and messaging. Exactly. But I would not be shocked if they, you know, did a little Hunger Games mutation action on that shit. That's gonna be a good thing. Oh my gosh.
SPEAKER_01The CIA said not pigeons with secret cameras to gather intelligence during the Cold War. The camera was so tiny and lightweight that a pigeon could carry it. And the pitch the camera was strapped to the bird's chest with a little harness. The bird would be released over a secret area in a foreign country that we want to know more about, and then again, they would come back and we'd have all this footage. So these projects we know happened, only partially declassified. So we don't have all the facts yet. It's familiar. We do know that there was a role for pigeons in like spy. Birds of a feather.
SPEAKER_03A murder of birds. That's what they're called. A murder of birds.
SPEAKER_01Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_03Like a murder.
SPEAKER_01Um and then the New Mexico Institute of Mining Technology has been working with you can go online and find this. And I think this is the closest thing to what we're probably envisioning. Like they're using taxidermy dead birds to to re-engineer them as drones. No, they're like zombies. Yeah, so they're pretty much like building drones, but then they're using like the taxidermy carcass and they're trying to make them like fly, you like research like the flying zombie birds.
SPEAKER_03No, they're making in fairy birds, yeah. Zombie birds. You know what in fairy are? Harry Potter.
SPEAKER_01Okay, no.
SPEAKER_03Um you know what in fairy are?
SPEAKER_01Harry Potter. Come on.
SPEAKER_03Reanimated dead bodies with dark magic.
SPEAKER_02What book did that have?
SPEAKER_03That happened in book six when Harry.
SPEAKER_02Oh, in the lake.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Um I blocked that book. So they so this institute, the New Mexico Institute of Mining Technology, they're claiming like their whole purpose is to study wildlife. Like they want these taxidermy curves to be blind. But they're like, but that doesn't mean that at some point this won't be used for national security. No, like that's what they're saying.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, exactly.
SPEAKER_01You also think if they create this, that the CIA is not going to come in and be like CIA, we'll mess everything up.
SPEAKER_02To counter argument that, I feel like if the CIA was like thought it was suspicious and useful in any way, they would have already taken control of it by now.
SPEAKER_03You know what I mean? If they thought it was actually useful.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, we talked before about how if there's like something that you want to patent that could impact, like could be helpful or not, that you won't get the patent and it can be, yeah, used by the govern by the government. Okay, and then so two other little things. Um, we do know that China has a they call it like a the little falcon, and it's a bird drone. Of course it is. It's done a recent test, or it was like they did a demonstration in the capital city of China. Uh, and the national news outlet described it as the most agile and lifelike bird-like drone anywhere in the world. No, uh terrifying. Will likely lead to research in the field for years to come. I don't like that.
SPEAKER_03And then for What are the Chinese using that for? That's my question. You know.
SPEAKER_01Oh.
SPEAKER_03Talk. Tick on the clock.
SPEAKER_01And then finally, I have, I think, kind of what you mentioned, the U.S. Navy Marine Mammal Program, which was established in the 1960s, utilized penguins. I just let me just take this back to the dolphins again. Oh. They utilize dolphins? Dolphins and sea lions for various tasks, including surveillance, mine detection, and object recovery. Specifically the dolphins, because they have that sonar capability. So during Vietnam and the Gulf War, they really utilize the dolphins to locate underwater mines and to protect ships. They're again unique biological sonar systems. Are part our particular interest in the superior capabilities compared to human-made technology. That was from Chat GPT. Echo location.
SPEAKER_03How can you train a dolphin to do that? I know I'm interested in that too.
SPEAKER_01I mean, maybe I keep telling you guys that we aren't going to cover dolphins because it's not a conspiracy theory, but maybe we'll have to talk about them bearing the season list.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I just think we should talk about dolphins. Okay. Add it to the season.
SPEAKER_01Add it to the season list. Impersonation. Guys, Joey did a dolphin impression on a previous podcast. So funny go it was so good. But when we went to edit it, it was it was too high pitched. She literally sounded like a she was so good that like the recording couldn't pick it up. It was so and it was just out of the blue. Yeah. Too perfect to even be registered. On our um the sound wave garage band that we used to record on. So all right. That is what my research taught me about birds.
SPEAKER_03That's really interesting. While you were talking, I did the research about the vine that I was referring to. I've combined two different videos.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_03Um, as per my MO. My memory failed me. But it did start on TikTok. Um, not Vine, TikTok. Because birds aren't real. Yeah, and it was this guy. It was 2019.
SPEAKER_02I'm gonna play the audio because every time I say the birds work for the bourgeoisie, this is what I'm quoting. And it happened while I was in college.
SPEAKER_00All of the birds died in 1986 due to Reagan killing them and replacing them with spies that are now watching us. The birds work for the bourgeoisie.
SPEAKER_03The birds work for the bourgeoisie. I'm sure you've heard me say that. I have, yeah.
SPEAKER_01And I will say, um I tagged the birds aren't real on Instagram in one of our stories, but they have a pretty good merch store. Um, and actually, I I've been on it twice this week and it's been updated in like within that time. Uh, and I think that that's how this guy supports himself now. His merch. Just like birds aren't real.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I was gonna say just me looking up this TikTok, I saw some of his t-shirts and something about bird shirts.
SPEAKER_03I'm just really into it. You know who likes bird shirts? Who? Winnie the Bish. I love watching the birds. I love I we have like blue jays that are mean. I understand they're mean. But they do come around and they are pretty. My sister's only 23. And she I didn't do math. And she loves bird watching. She bird watches all the time. Well, also, millennials are like the this has nothing to do with birds, but like millennials are being compared to the generation that went through the Great Depression. Uh-huh. Because I guess the Great Depression started after the pandemic, right?
SPEAKER_01In 1990, the Great Depression was 1929. And what the Spanish flu influenza was in, yeah.
SPEAKER_03So there's like people that compare millennials to that same generation because millennials are starting to adapt the things that those it's true. Bird watching, gardening. We're growing our own food, we're learning how to make bread.
SPEAKER_01We also grew up it well again, we are the era, right? Yeah, we've talked about this. Like we remember, Kate and I remember life before the internet and after the internet. Yeah. And I think we've we have seen the the yes, like the social media devastation. Yes. Like and I think that we're all like You guys want to talk about a pandemic.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Social media is a pandemic.
SPEAKER_01So we're like, do we want to sit in our phones and be depressed about the world? Or do we want to go plant some tomatoes and watch the birds?
SPEAKER_03And also talk to people in real life. You mean necessarily need to talk to people. You talk to me.
SPEAKER_01I mean, I talk to people I like.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. You talk to people you like, but you we have conversations with people outside of the internet. The internet. Yeah. So yeah. I I um I can't remember the last time I called somebody. Yeah, I call you. Yeah. I pick up. I call you. You guys don't call me as much as well.
SPEAKER_01You call because you have like a long commute and you want to talk.
SPEAKER_03I also call when I go on up for walks. Yeah. Okay.
SPEAKER_01Colleen, do you have anything else to say about the birds?
SPEAKER_02I don't necessarily think all the birds are drones. Yeah. But I do think bird science is related to research for drones.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, no, I think 100% there's probably engineers out there who are like looking, like you said, how do birds fly, right? When we started, you guys were like, Yeah, how do they do it?
SPEAKER_02Well, actually, I know how they do it because I used to go to the science museum a lot.
SPEAKER_03Uh-huh. And there was a whole exhibit on bird flight.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_03And they're the way their arms shape the direction.
SPEAKER_01You guys can't see, but um Colleen's currently doing a reenactment for us. Like backwards, under, backwards, under, so it twists, so it gets thrust with the wind. Um yeah, I'm sure that some engineer somewhere has studied that and been like, we should use this in our technology. And if we disguise them with taxidermied birds, it's disturbing.
SPEAKER_03Maybe the birds will recognize that they're drones. World War Z is coming. Yeah. I'm telling you what, we cannot trust robots. Oh I'm serious. Like, the Terminator has happened, people. AI is terrifying. AI is terrifying. Like they can feel emotions. Yeah. They're talking about robots feeling emotion. Yeah, that robot Rachel. Yeah. I don't like her. No. Anyway, uh, birds aren't real is one of the first things that Colleen said to me in passing. Like when you met her? When yeah. Um, and I was like, I have no idea what the bourgeoisie is.
SPEAKER_01But also, I'm sorry. I just want to clarify, Colleen, I have heard her say many times birds aren't real. And are you telling me now that all of that stems from this vine you saw, which was this guy who is faking it? Yeah. Okay. Does that not check out? No, just because he's like, he's like he's like everyone initially who got on board with this new was fake. I didn't know it was fake, but I thought it was a crazy conspiracy guy.
SPEAKER_03But does that not check out for who I am though? Yeah, yeah. That's what I'm saying. Like, it's one of my first memories. One of my first memories is Colleen saying, birds aren't real. They work for the bourgeoisie. And the second one was like, what do you think about Mother Earth? You think we've got like a like Earth is our mother? Yeah, like the guitar movie idea. Yeah, that's what she meant. Yeah, relate to that. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01And Kate probably was like, I could get on board with this.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. If you ask me about what my religion is, it's something like that. Like I knew it was a crazy conspiracy guy.
SPEAKER_01Like I I just figured it was a dick, but he was just a crazy guy. It was for being funny. Understood. Okay, totally misunderstood. And I thought I was like, well, yeah, I got into it. And I was like, wrong with you. I'm the curmudgeon on the front stoop who's like, it's these days.
SPEAKER_03No, it's like the flat earth. Like I know the earth's not flat, but I thought it was the the bird conspiracy was led by a guy like the flat earth. Okay. I didn't realize he actually didn't believe it. Yeah. Which is funny. Yeah, no, or Colleen was always like, Yeah, birds aren't real. And I'd be like, What? And she's like, look it up. Do your research. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02And I will say though, there are things that I believe without researching thoroughly. Like I'm gullible. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Also, I like how whenever we start, whenever I start an episode, I'm like, So what do you guys think? And you both, with like one sentence, they're like, I'm in. I'm in. Exactly.
SPEAKER_03If you can hug me with one thing, I'm like, wait a second. When you almost had me when you were like, We've never seen baby pigeons. I was like, You should have actually both their faces they should just stop. And like, I'm like, I don't think I've ever seen a baby pigeon. Uh huh. Have I seen a baby? I think I've only seen baby robins. Where do pigeons like pigeons congregate in the city? Because where are pigeons originally from? They're they're like city birds. But before there were cities. Maybe like townies wouldn't. I want all the woodland creatures to come to me.
SPEAKER_02You want to be like a Disney Cinderella. Yeah, but then birds and ducks and swans and geese, you don't want them in your land because you wouldn't let be able to let the kids out because they will bite.
SPEAKER_03Oh, they get vicious. Well, they own they're only vicious with their own. They're territorial though. Right. So if your young kids are part of their territory, then let me let me live my life.
SPEAKER_01Okay. But these like fural pigeons we have now are like a crossbreed from like escaped domestic birds and these pigeons that have been around for thousands and thousands of years. Yeah, but where do they come from in general? Okay, you just asked me about okay. Listen, I'm on blog.nature.org. I'm like, what came first? The chicken or the There are between 260- I think the chicken came first. Chickens evolved. So I think Oh no, chickens evolve from dinosaurs.
SPEAKER_03Yes. So like a chicken's cousin. You know what I mean? Like how chimps are our cousins. I don't know if I believe in evolution. I don't. You truly don't believe in evolution? I don't. Because I think if you have to believe, if you believe in evolution, then you believe that the big bang was was what created the universe, and I don't believe that. Nowhere in history has a chemical reaction just happened without a combustion. So that is that is the biggest flaw of that theory. You have to have something to create a chemical reaction. And there is nothing that creates a chemical reaction in the Big Bang Theory. It just happened. I think it takes a lot of faith to believe that just something happened, just as much as faith to believe that God spoke the universe into existence. It does. I mean, people people choose to say they don't have faith, but you just have faith in something else. I think I'm very confident in that. I don't know.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Okay, guys, back to the original question. Pigeons came from Southern Europe, North Africa, and Western Asia. But the reason there's there's such city birds now is because they started these like domesticated. Yeah, these domestic birds that would like flee would would like re flee. Domestic birds that would like get out of the house or whatever would reproduce with these pigeons and they just become like this like feral feral? Feral. Feral? Feral. Feral birds. Feral birds. So anyway, now we have hundreds of millions of pigeons in the world. So that's crazy. That is crazy. We're mating like pigeons. Alright. Any final thoughts, guys? The birds work for the bourgeoisie.
SPEAKER_03I I I still want my chickens. Yeah. They're birds. The chickens are birds.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02I just think because birds are such different creatures than like humans, they freak me out.
SPEAKER_03They are like, I mean, they d they are dinosaurs.
SPEAKER_01They really are. And again, we've said it before, but this these eyes on the side of their head really don't like that. Yeah. Because they look at you from their profile, because that's how they see you, and that's really creepy.
SPEAKER_03360 degree. You know they don't pee.
SPEAKER_02Oh. They don't make urine.
SPEAKER_03It's like all white is poop. Like they don't pee. Oh, they they excrete all in the same way. Yeah, it's all on track. And it all comes and the egg comes from the same old egg. I think it's so long. It's like how tiny a hummingbird's heart is. So tiny. You look like you're gonna cry. They're so small. And that's weird. Think about an earthworm. So tiny.
SPEAKER_01So final thoughts. You guys believe birds are real? Oh, birds are real. Oh yeah, birds are real.
SPEAKER_03I mean, I do like birds are real, but probably science is involved in making them useful. Yeah. Science needs to be.
SPEAKER_01I think there probably are a couple of spies up there that are disguised as birds, but I do not think that someone killed off. There's no way. Also, where would they put all the dead bodies? There you go, unless they're taxidermying them to be used as I mean, I think that they're using taxidermy. Yeah, I think zombies did not kill billions of birds. I think for the most part, birds are birds, but what if a turkey drone just came running at you? I really want to know what that animal was that you saw.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, we definitely gotta get the mountain men on this.
SPEAKER_02Mountain monsters?
SPEAKER_03Yeah, mountain monsters.
SPEAKER_01Well, unfortunately, the main guy passed.
SPEAKER_02Oh.
SPEAKER_01But maybe we can call um Jacob? Jacob from Mountain Monsters. Was he the younger one? Or the one in the hat?
SPEAKER_03Security or trapman? The one who rolled down the hill. Okay.
SPEAKER_01Okay, guys. Um, so I guess that's it. Sounds like we're all still believing in the birds. Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Uh I love birds.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Yeah, I still do freak out after I have you guys watched The Birds?
SPEAKER_03Did you know cards also mate for life and they stay in the same spot? Oh no. Yeah, isn't that so sweet? Virginia State Bird. North Carolina State Bird.
SPEAKER_02Chickadee D, chickadee dy, chickadee d.
SPEAKER_01Uh have you guys seen The Birds by Alfred Hitchcock? No. Yes. Okay, I still freak out whenever I see the birds line up at a power line.
SPEAKER_02You know what bird I actually enjoy? What? I do enjoy crows. Flamingos. And how they give you gifts. Crows. You know, yeah, like if a crow visits your yard and you put shiny things out, like quarters, pennies, tin foil, the crow will take that and then bring you gifts. They will? That's so cute. It's actually quite adorable. And there's a crow that taunts Benny every day uh outside my window. And I'm like, I'm gonna leave them a shiny thing.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, leave them a penny. Yeah. See a penny, pick it up. Oh, and you mentioned flamingos, right?
SPEAKER_01You gotta know where flamingos get their color?
SPEAKER_03The shrimp they eat. Yeah. That's right.
SPEAKER_01And then the bait babies suck all the pink out of them, right?
SPEAKER_03That's right. Get your pink back. Oh. Shout out Jillian. Yeah. Shout out Jillian. All right, Kate. What should the people do? Um, the people should scroll on down, leave us a five-star review, let us know if you like the birds, if you believe that they're bird drones, if you believe birds aren't real, we want to know. Um, send us an audio clipping of your favorite bird sound. Yeah. Right. Yeah. Yeah. I'll make that into a thing. Go ahead and do that. Bird of the week. You guys ever heard about a mocking bird? My one of my dogs that got dive bombed by mocking birds in the backyard. She had to hide underneath the um the hammock in our backyard when I was growing up. She was dive-bombed by mocking birds, and she was just cowering looking at that. I thought it was kind of funny.
SPEAKER_01Mock. Yeah. I thought mocking birds were fake. Yeah. Bird. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. All right, guys. Thanks for joining. See you. See you next Tuesday. Bye.