005. Latina Pero Introverted AF: Unleashing the Power of Your Voice

In this episode of Latinas in Leadership, Alejandra shares her personal journey of overcoming her fears and insecurities related to sharing her voice as an introverted Latina. She disputes common myths about introverts including the belief that they are shy, antisocial, dislike public speaking, or are not skilled at networking. She goes through how you can unleash the power of your voice, even as an introvert. 

03:53 Personal Story: Growing Up as an Introverted Latina

05:03 Understanding Introversion: Myths and Realities

06:05 Famous Introverts Who Inspire

06:43 Personal Journey: Unleashing the Power of My Voice

10:32 Debunking Myths About Introverts

13:01 Introverted or Insecure? A Self-Reflection

14:06 Steps to Unleash the Power of Your Voice as an Introvert

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Transcript

Shure MV7: 0:53

Hello? Hello. Welcome back to Latinas in leadership. I hope you had a beautiful things giving. I know the holidays can be. If you for some great for others may be a mixed bag for you. And I pray you that you had a beautiful Thanksgiving, that you had some delicious food and hopefully got to. Spend time with your family. And that, that is a good thing. Or, you know, family either by blood or by chosen your chosen family. So we enjoyed our dinner. It was, we kept it really small. It was me, my husband and our dog Bentley. Us three here in the house, we cooked the Mac and cheese. I told you about last week, which was super fire. We were literally eating that up until I think Sunday, we were eating Mac and cheese. So all Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. We had Mac and cheese. You know, it's like one of those things where I'm having Mac and cheese for breakfast, Mac, and cheese for dinner, but we got through all of it. It was delicious. the most hilarious thing, my husband likes to give my dog food that we eat on the table. And that is just not something that I like to do or do myself. I'm kind of like the type of Hispanic where growing up, my mom, she's from farmland in Columbia. From villages. So rural Colombia, and she didn't understand the concept of dogs being like a loving pet. She saw dogs as you know, they protect the house and like, That's it. They're just, they're just there. They're there as protectors. Of the farm. Or of the home. And so even just like growing up, when we did finally get a dog, like, you know, we obviously, he was the best thing ever. We loved him so much, but even then, like, I didn't see my mom really feed him table food or anything like that. And I'm very, very annoyed by dogs who will cry and whine. When you are eating on the table, like I do not like that at all. And I am very quick to reprimand that if my dog does that. And so my husband though, we'll give him food from the table and it was the funniest thing. He literally put together a whole plate. Of Thanksgiving dinner for my dog, like his bowl. I had Mac and cheese beef on there with the gravy. And what was the other thing we made? I can't remember the last thing we made, but it was Mac and cheese. The beef with the gravy and there was one oh, Brussels sprouts. Brussels sprouts with bacon. Made him all whole plate. Y'all like, I took a picture of it. Cause I was like, I cannot believe this dog is having a Thanksgiving meal. And so he was so happy. We had a great time. You know, was really able to spend some time and reflection about the things that we're grateful about. The things that God has blessed us with this year and the things that we are looking forward to as well. So I hope that it was a great dinner for you that you had great food. And that you were able to spend time with family again, whether that's blood or chosen.

Shure MV7 & Lumina Camera - Raw: 3:53

I'm really excited about today's podcast because it is one that is very near and dear to my heart. Something that I have personally walked through. And. Feel really passionate about because of that. Today, what we're talking about is how you as a Latina introvert can still speak up and still speak up with confidence. Promote yourself. Network. And that there's nothing wrong with you or anything that makes you less than for being in introvert. I'm going to go over. What being an introvert actually means instead of the ways that we've distorted it. I'm going to talk about my story on how I went from being a super shy girl in high school who never raised her hand because I was just always afraid and insecure about looking dumb. To now having our fricking podcast. Like I have a podcast. I speak up. I actually am a paid speaker as well, and I really use my voice to be able to create change into the world and believe that introverts. Are more than capable of this. I'll talk about my story. I will also talk about myths that there are, that exist on being an introvert. And I will go over tangible steps that you can take today to unleash the power of your voice. Even as a Latina introvert. Let's jump in. Number one. What is an introvert? Introverts are people that tend to prefer quiet and minimally stimulating environments while extroverts usually need higher levels of stimulation to feel their best. And it really comes down to this. There's a really great book by Susan Cain called quiet, the power of introverts in a world that can't stop talking. And I really loved her perspective because she talks about introversion as really boiling down to stimulation. Introverts tend to want quieter places. Extroverts tend to do well, even in places that are loud or noisy and stimulation can come in all forms by the way, this can be social stimulation. It can be lights, noise. Other things introverts thrive in quieter and less stimulating environments. Like small gatherings. One-on-ones. Things with close friends, for example. And there are many powerful introverts out there that are using their voice to make a huge difference in the world. Here's some of the introverts that I know that inspire me. Number one, Bernay brown is an introvert. Oprah Winfrey is an introvert. Oprah Winfrey y'all she's an introvert. And she ran. ATV show for decades. Emma Watson is an introvert and Rosa parks is an introvert. These are powerful women that used their voice for good and for transformation and change. And you can be that too. Being an introvert does not mean that it is. Impossible for you to speak up, to share your truth, to have a purpose and be able to create impact in the world. That is not true because there are so many out there that are doing that very thing. My own journey with unleashing the power of my voice as a Latina introvert. Is definitely a long one. This is not something that I just like snap of my finger. I figured out I was in the next day was like, I'm going to start using my voice. Like, no, this took. A lot of unlearning for me, I was a shy girl in high school. And like I said, I was too afraid to even raise my hand in school to answer questions at a fear of looking stupid. This transition into the workplace where I was too afraid to share my ideas. In the corporate meetings, because what if it's a dumb idea or what if someone has a different idea than everyone likes that idea? And now I'm going to feel like I should have never shared mine. I also did not like networking. I really, really did not like it. And I didn't think that it was for me. In my head, I was so outspoken and bold. Like y'all, don't even understand who I was in my head, who I am in my head. I don't know if this is an introverted thing, but I go through full blown novellas in my head. There's whole things happening. So in my head I was super outspoken and bold, but in reality, I struggled a lot and I felt a lot of shame about it because I was like, I don't get it in my head. I'm so bold. And I'll say these things and. I'll stand up for myself and I'll stand up for what's true. But then when it comes down to a situation where it's time to do that, I would usually silence myself. So I felt a lot of shame around that. And I didn't think that that was something I could break through. And then two things happened around basically the same time in my life that really helped transition this number one. I started a four month personal development program and it was the first time I had ever done personal development. It was like being thrusted into the personal development world. It was insane. I felt like I had gotten into a roller coaster and was just like, shoot it out. It was really intense. That happened. And then around that same time, I became a career coach, which wound up being. My dream job that I didn't even know I wanted that will have to be another story for a different podcast. How I became a coach. But I wasn't even looking for it. And when I found career coaching and I started coaching. I was completely blown away and knew this is what I want to do. So these two things happened around the same time. One I encounter what seems to be a job that is totally for me. And then two, I went through this personal development program. Before this, I had never had a job that I actually was excited about or a job that I thought was aligned with me and my purpose. I just got jobs to get jobs. I. I was just trying to get by and figure out what I wanted to do in life. So these two pivotal things happen around the same time. And in the coaching program, the personal development program, there were coaches in it. So in there I would get coached hard. Like there were some days where I had to really check my ego because they would coach hard in this program. And I recognized how much I was silencing myself. Part of that was because, you know, the coach would literally like. Put it right in front of my face and I wanted to deny it, but then I would realize like, oh, I do silence myself. And I recognized as well that I was using being an introvert as an excuse to cover up my insecurity and my traumas. I was using being an introvert to be a reason why I don't like getting close to other people when really that's rooted in my fear around abandonment or fear around someone betraying me. And this was the process where it really started for me too. I look at myself. And face the truth and say, this is not how I want to live my life. I want to be able to use my voice, to be able to empower other people and make a difference in the world. And I started to unpack myths. And so here are four myths that are holding you back from unleashing the power of your voice. If you believe this about yourself as an introvert. For myths about introverts number one, being an introvert means you are shy. This is a myth. Shyness is the fear of negative judgment. Introversion is simply your preference for less stimulation. That's it. Shyness usually comes from fear, introversion. Is not to that. Just because you were an introvert does not mean you are shy. You can be. But it doesn't, they're not the same. You can be introverted and confident. You can be introverted and outspoken. Number two, being an introvert means you are anti-social. Oh my gosh. Y'all I used to wear this one, like a badge of honor. All the time. I don't like people. I'd rather be at home and I see memes on this all the time as well. I know y'all have seen it. 2020 taught us many things. One of them is we are not antisocial. We do not do well when we don't hang out with other people. We actually are very unwell when we are not able to hang out with other people when we are isolated. And that's one of the worst things that you can do to a human being is to isolate them. Because we are. Community people we need other people. In that can be very uncomfortable for an introvert. Being an introvert does not mean that your antisocial. We are not anti-social. We can just socialize differently. It usually means that we like, more intimate groups. Number three, being an introvert. Means you don't like public speaking. This is a myth. This is not true. We already talked about Oprah Winfrey. First of all, ran a whole show for decades. Number two Bernay brown. Is a paid speaker and yes, she has mentioned in her books by the way that she gets nervous before her talks. Okay. Yeah, that's totally fine. That doesn't mean that we can't do public speaking engagements or even that we don't like them just because you're nervous doesn't mean that it's something that's bad. I was super nervous about starting this podcast. Doesn't make it bad. I'm just a human being. That's it. Number four, being an introvert means you don't like socializing or you suck at networking. Being an introvert doesn't mean that you can't network and it doesn't mean they can't socialize. And introverts actually tend to do really well at developing in depth relationships with people. Something you might hear from introverts. Is we just, we hate small talk. We really want to be able to be in small intimate spaces and just really get to know people and be in depth. With them. And that can be really great for networking. So it doesn't mean being an introvert does not mean that you suck at networking. So the number one question that I pose to you is, are you introverted or are you insecure? And you have to start asking yourself that question. When you. Say that you cannot do something because you are introverted. Ask yourself. Am I introverted or am I insecure? Because there's a big difference between these two and we have to stop completing them. How do you tell. If something's because you're introverted or something is because you're insecure. One of the best ways that I think about it is am I completely avoiding this task? Or am I adjusting the task? To fit my introverted nature. An example would be. Am I completely avoiding networking because I say I'm an introvert. Or am I adjusting my networking to fit my introverted nature. Examples of that could be. I go to networking events that are smaller and more intimate and not add bars where they play loud music. For example. That would be a way. Where you're introverted nature. You're using that and you're taking that into account. And you're making it work for you. That would be you being introverted. Versus you being insecure as ignoring the whole thing altogether and saying, oh, I can't do it because I'm introverted. So think about it. Am I completely avoiding this task or am I adjusting the task to fit my personality? So, this is how you unleash the power of your voice as an introvert. Unleashing the power of your voice, by the way, doesn't mean that you have to go and you have to speak on stages or that you have to start a podcast. Unleashing the power of your voice can be you leading meetings in your company. Or you and your one-on-ones with your peers. You raising your hand in the meeting and sharing your idea. You advocating for yourself at work? It can mean a bunch of different things. You want to start off with number one? Where do you want to unleash the power of your voice? Be focused, have focus. Where do you want to unleash the power of your voice? Maybe it is in meetings. That you're having with your team or in your one-on-ones. Or maybe it's at networking events. Think about where do you want to unleash the power of your voice? Be focused, have a focused area. That's number one. Number two. Why do you want to unleash the power of your voice? Have a vision. Why is it important for you? What's the difference that it's going to make in your life. What's the difference it's going to make in other people's lives. Number three, start unleashing your voice in small doses. So, this is what I did when I was like, okay. It's time for me to start speaking up. I don't want to silence myself anymore. I want to share what I have to say. I want to be able to empower other Latinas and I want to get my message out. But I'm terrified. So, what do I do? I started in small doses and I worked my way up. For example, I would, at the beginning, I recorded a video of myself and I shared it with just a few of my friends. And I was like, Hey, like, can you give me some feedback on this? A few of my friends, and that was terrifying for me, by the way, to send that video out to people and say, Hey, can I get feedback was terrifying for me? That was number one. Number two. I started to post videos on my ID stories. Now most of my content and where I hang out the most is on LinkedIn. But at that time I decided to do it on IgE stories. It felt a lot more comfortable for me. And I only shared it with close friends. Then from there, I posted videos on my IG stories to all my followers. And then I posted videos on Instagram reels. Then I went live on Instagram. That was like a real doozy. Then I went live on Instagram. I joined a Toastmasters group and volunteered to do a one minute presentation in front of strangers. That were going to give me feedback and I don't even know these people and I couldn't even read off of anything. And he had like, you see, you hear me already get, like, it was a whole thing for me to do that. My hands were so sweaty. My heart rate was not normal. But I kept building and building and building. Then I went on my husband's podcast. My husband has a podcast and I feel really safe with him. So I went on his podcast. Then I started to host my own virtual workshops. And now I have my own podcast. But this journey started years ago and I built myself up. One step out of time. So another way that you can unleash the power of your voice is to start by doing it in small doses and work your way up. Maybe you share one idea in your next one-on-one meeting. Wherever you decided you want to unleash the power of your voice by being focused and then we're, and the reason why you want to do it, why is it important for you? Like having that vision? Start with a plan and have small doses and increase your way up. Number four, you want to reduce and or prepare for stimulation as much as possible. Examples could be. If you decide that you want to share an idea for a meeting, think about what that idea is. Prepare questions, prepare yourself as well. If someone is going to respond back or let's say, what if a few people have questions in response to your ideas, prepare for them, think about them. What could those questions be? What could some of the concerns be and address them beforehand so that when you are there, you are prepared for them. Another example could be you doing networking in a more one-on-one setting. Using coffee chats. For example, that's a great way to reduce and or prepare for stimulation as much as possible. Another example that I'll give from my personal life is I will go to conferences. The ones that I go to are multi days. They got all these workshops. And they're long days. I sign up for workshops. Thinking about. Me as an introvert. I know that I cannot do all the things. And I know that if I try to do all the things, I will exhaust myself. And it will not be an enjoyable experience. And I'm not about to pay hundreds of dollars. To not even have an enjoyable experience. So, what I do is I look over the agenda of the conference. I select which workshops I'm going to do. I take the L's on some, there are some workshops I've taken the L on that I wanted to do, but I knew that's not going to work for me. That these are examples of you taking into consideration, you being introverted and making it work for you. Reduce interrupt, prepare for stimulation as much as possible. I want you to take action and decide where do you want to unleash the power of your voice? Why is that important for you? Think about your plan? What step one? And then no baby steps. Take one at a time. My first step was taking a video on my own phone and sharing it with only a few people that I trusted. So whatever your first step is, just find that and take that first step and reducing our prepare for stimulation as much as possible. I feel really, really strongly about this, because if you are an introvert, I know what it's like to feel like you're not good enough. You're not smart enough. You're not confident enough. You can't just do it the way she does it. But we can't compare ourselves to other people. You are one-on-one. There's no one out there like you, and there's no one out there with the voice that you have. There is no one out there with the. Story and the perspective that you have. And maybe that's hard for you to believe right now. I feel that that was me at one point. Just know that it is true. And be open to believing that it is true. Your voice is so needed in this world. And I hope that you take these steps. To unleash the power of your voice. Thank you for joining and I'll talk to y'all soon. Bye.