Everyone Hates Curses

Is Michelle cursed? An Egg cleanse, a random mention of an evil eye and a psychic bringing up past lives has got her thinking she must be! Do you believe someone has put a hex on you? 

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Everyone hates you! Hello and welcome to Everyone Hates You, a podcast with me, Michelle Shaughnessy, where we talk about rejections and failures. So I have a guest on an upcoming episode. In hindsight, I probably should have done this after that one airs, but we didn't talk about the specific thing for too long or in too much detail. So I feel like it's okay. Um the guest had mentioned that his girlfriend had done an egg cleanse on him. And I love all that type of stuff. I love all the woo-woo. I love all the witchy. I am all for it. So I did one on myself yesterday. So I'm gonna tell you exactly a little bit about the egg cleansing. I I did some research into it because there's so many different interpretations, but how you do it, I'm gonna butcher this. It's called Limpia Cornjuvo. That's uh an egg cleanse, but okay, so it says you roll the egg over your body from like top to bottom, kind of like you start at the top and you go all the way down to your feet. Um, and it's supposed to kind of like do that to like absorb the evil or like the negativity that's like been put on you or that is in you. Some people say that it can, when I say some people, I mean like there's so many different interpretations of egg cleansing. I think is what I'm trying to say. So I'd read some interpretations where it says it's like if you have a curse on you, like it pulls that out. And other ones it just said, oh, it's just to help yourself be more positive. So I think it just depends on what you're looking for. So what you do is you do that for a couple minutes to try to get the negativity absorbed into the egg. Then you crack the egg into a glass that's already three-quarters full with water, and you leave it for a couple minutes and then you read the egg. So my egg specifically, I'm gonna read you a few of the interpret a few of the interpretations. So I had a broken egg, first of all. Some modern readers interpret it as blocked energy, emotional overload, or soul loss. What the fuck does soul loss mean? Like I get the whole like energy's blocked, this emotional overload. Yeah, I feel that. I'm doing a fucking egg cleanse by myself at night with my limited free time. I think I feel the emotional overload. But what is the soul loss? What does that even mean? So not only was my egg broken, okay, it had what they call like spikes or needles, almost like little web-like spiky things coming up out of my egg that had sunk to the bottom coming up. Um, and this one says jealousy, jealousy or psychic attack. Someone is directing negativity at you. Who the fuck are you? Some interpretations go as far as calling these needle-likes, these needle-like marks a sign of intentional hexing. Okay, I have talked about this. Okay, let me finish. I I will circle back to the acting because I have talked about this before in life and I probably on the pilot I talk about it a lot. So, lastly, my egg um was broken. We went through the broken. So my egg was sinking, which is this is this is the messed up thing because there's so many interpretations that are so vastly different about what a sinking egg means. Warner tradition says that all the negativity has successfully been removed. Okay. Or another one says, you have so much negativity that it's not removed and you need to do this again. This is a bad sign. So basically, I'm either fine or I gotta roll eggs on my goddamn body every night for the rest of my life because somebody has hexed me. So I was in New York City a while ago, maybe about seven or so years ago. And while there, I hurt my neck. I hurt my neck, I woke up. It was not a great bed that I was sleeping in, and I woke up with a really sore neck. So I Googled where the closest like massage place was to me. I was staying in um an Airbnb in Harlem, and I Googled the closest massage place to me and I found one that had amazing reviews. Like I'm talking amazing reviews, and they were like, if you can get an appointment with him, you have to take it. Amazing. I don't typically gear towards male massage therapists, but I was in a lot of pain and I was like, great, good reviews, I will go. I didn't know it was a home studio till I got there, which weirded me out a little. But again, I had prepaid. It was one of those things where you book online and you have to prepay. And now I might eat that cost if I was like, okay, this is a man and it's in his home. But at the time I was like, I paid. I need this, my neck hurts. So I go in, one of the best massagers of my life. He was some sort of former athlete. I think he said he played college football or something like that in his time, but he was very spiritual and was very kind. But before I left, he was like, I need to tell you something. And he took both my hands and he said there was something to do with an evil eye on me. Okay. He said there was an evil eye on me. The evil eye, the evil eye is basically it's basically like this ancient belief that somebody can bring bad luck onto you just by like looking at you with like jealousy and like negativity. Which is kind of like the way that I read it, and I don't know if maybe there's a lot of interpretations about this, and I didn't go into all of them, but it kind of seemed like you could put the evil eye on somebody without even knowing it. Kind of like if somebody, if you're even like walking by somebody and they're jealous of like something that you're wearing or they are jealous of your purse or your bag or something, that can put the evil eye on you. And I don't know, I don't know how I feel about that. Like it shows up in a lot of cultures across like the Mediterranean and the Middle East and like South Asia, I think, for sure, but it's highly different than like a curse, which is what I thought it was. Like when he had explained it to me, he didn't say that whole like you could accidentally get it put on you. He made it sound like somebody specific had put a curse on me. Now, again, if this happened to me now, I would be obsessed about it. So he gave me a bracelet with like a little eye thing, a red bracelet to wear, and I lost it. And I am devastated that I lost it because I feel like that is not good. If I do have a curse in me, maybe that made it worse. But I don't know why I let it go. I don't know why. I let it go. There are ways that people can protect themselves from the evil eye. You can get like the blue eye amulet thing, which is like the bracelet that he gave me. It's like the you guys know the symbol. I'll pop it in the video for reference. Um you can do prayers, you can do salt rituals, you can do all that stuff. And I've done that stuff before. Like I got into that whole like salt ritual thing once. And for me, it's kind of the same way I get into everything where I do it like every day for a bit, and then I just like forget about it. The whole thing is really about envy though. Like all the little interpretations I read about the evil eye thing, it all kind of traced back to envy. Like if something is going too well for you, like if you're too happy, if you're too successful, if you're too attractive, or like suddenly you're so vulnerable. You're so vulnerable to the evil eye, to that envy, that negative envy energy that is put on you. Which brings me to, I started to think about other curses, okay? Like okay, so I've been told that I'm cursed. I've been told my egg reading says I'm the curse has been lifted, or that I have a lot of it and I need to keep doing the egg thing. So where do I go from here? So I am reaching out to a few things, okay? I've reached out to some witches, some modern witches have reached out to some tarot readers. I am gonna take you guys on a little journey with me on this season of everyone hates you. We are gonna try to get to the bottom of why everyone hates me. Is it this curse? And I know what you're thinking. You're like, Michelle, when we said you need professional help, we met a professional therapist. But no, I'm going to professional psychics, witches, healers. I'm gonna do it all. We're gonna get to the bottom of this, okay? And I'm sure at the end of the day, every I'm sure at the end of the day, I might even be more confused than I am. I'm sure at the end of all of this if I don't at least have some answers, I'll have at least good content. And you know, if I can't monetize my hate and my curses, then what is even the point of life? What do you guys think? Do you guys believe in curses? Do you guys believe that somebody can put the evil eye on you specifically? Or do you believe that we're all a product of our own energy? And by that I mean we create the energy around us and we create the energy that the universe gives us. What do you guys think? I'm very curious about that. And if you are a witch or you are a healer, please reach out to me. Because I once had a psychic tell me that everyone hated me because I gave off a male energy. She said I was a man in every single one of my past lives, except for, well, this isn't my past one yet. She, that was a bad thing to say. I think I just cursed myself, you guys. Basically, she said, in my past lives, I was a man. So I give off a male energy and it confuses people. Basically, she said it confuses people. That men don't know what to do with it, and women are put off by it and they have their backup and they don't know why. And that men specifically were more confused by it than women were. And so I've sat on that a lot. I've sat on that a lot and thought, is that why? Because it's not even just that everyone hates me in the sense that people get to know me and they hate me. Like if people get to know me and they don't like me, you know what? That's fine. That actually hurts me a lot less than people who don't get to know me, you know, or people who I meet and then they get to know me and they're like, oh my God, I didn't think you were gonna be nice. I get that a lot. I've talked about that on previous podcasts. So I'm trying to get to the bottom of it. And if you were somebody that also wants to get to the bottom of why everybody hates you or why you have a hard time making friends, reach out and let's chat about it. Let's do a phoner. I'm not even joking, let's do a phone in. So contact me at Michelle's Funny on all social media. And again, if you are a healer or a witch, please, please, please, please, please reach out to me. Let's chat. And for anyone else, please remember. Everyone hates you!