SABBATH: The Sabbath Reset | Love By Faith with Kyle & Selina Almodovar #108

We get practical about building a weekly Sabbath reset that helps our marriage rest, reconnect, and worship together. We share how we define “real rest,” why Sabbath is obedience, and how a simple plan can protect peace for the whole week. 

• Sabbath as worship and a weekly spiritual reset 
• why disobedience to rest leads to drift and burnout 
• how our Sabbath styles differ and why that’s normal 
• Kyle’s ideal Sunday rhythm with church, fellowship, family, and a real reset 
• Selina’s ideal Sabbath with quiet, self-care, reading, and low-pressure connection 
• writing individual “ideal Sabbath” statements before merging a shared plan 
• choosing a grounding scripture that keeps God at the center 
• building a list of shared Sabbath activities that actually restore us 
• creating a Sabbath no-fly list to protect boundaries and avoid resentment 

Be sure to download the Love By Faith Couple's Playbook for the newest resource, "The Spectacular Sabbath Setup"! 

Transcript

A Quiet Place And A Purpose

Selina Almodovar 0:00

Today's episode, we are gonna get very practical and we're gonna help you create a Sabbath reset in your marriage.

Kyle Almodovar 0:07

When we first got married, I used to think like we had to be together all day Sunday.

Selina Almodovar 0:11

What is your ideal Sabbath look like?

Kyle Almodovar 0:14

The Sabbath doesn't change God, right? It changes you.

Selina Almodovar 0:18

We're not perfect people by any means. But by trusting in God, we learned what it takes to build a friendship, a relationship, and marriage that has stood the test of time.

Kyle Almodovar 0:30

With a keeping it real style, we're gonna talk to you about everything. Everything that we've been through are going through and have overcome all by learning how to lean on God and each other in order to help you learn how to love by faith. When we come back here, I feel so peaceful coming here.

Selina Almodovar 1:02

That's great.

Kyle Almodovar 1:03

There's days where I'm like, oh man, we gotta record today.

Selina Almodovar 1:06

Yeah.

Kyle Almodovar 1:06

But then when I get in here, I'm like it feels like ministry, right? Like I get in and the Holy Spirit takes over and I'm ready to to share and to just give life to everything to let the dreams flow.

Selina Almodovar 1:20

You know, podcasting is a bit of a challenge because you have to stay consistent. It's ongoing. There's that ever demand of content to give something new to the people who are listening and watching. And for you to now see it as ministry, ultimately what it sounds like is it shifted from something you do or obligation to do and now is turning into worship. Because when you do something with the mindset of I'm doing this for God's kingdom, but in doing it, I know I'm gonna get filled back in. It then becomes more than just something you do, it becomes a worship because you have God in the middle of it and God is filling you as you're doing it. And it becomes this cycle of I'm getting poured into, I'm pouring out, and it helps me and it relieves me, and it's and it's just really beautiful that we we have been able to make Love by Faith podcasts into this act of worship.

Kyle Almodovar 2:26

Amen. No, that's 100% accurate. I sit down, you know, you guys can't see it, but behind the camera there's a chair right there in our house. Yeah. And I just picture a lot of times, I just picture I'm talking to a husband who's sitting right there who needs help with the topic, right? Or I'm talking to Jesus about what I need help with on this topic that we're talking about.

Selina Almodovar 2:43

That's awesome.

Kyle Almodovar 2:44

And so uh yeah, I sit down here and I'm just like, oh, it's like coming, you know, it's like a little piece. Y'all get a little piece of my quiet place, is right here. Amen. Sharing my heart with you and just talking with God and praise the Lord. Welcome to Love by Faith.

Selina Almodovar 2:59

We're your hosts, Selena and Kyle Almodovar, and we're so glad that you're here to join us in this quiet, peaceful place, a place where we can come together knowing that God's gonna be with us and that we're gonna be able to talk about topics about your relationship and your marriage that's gonna help you not only get you to a place where you want to be, but it's gonna get you closer to God in the process because that's our ultimate goal here. So we're glad and thankful that you're here listening and watching. And we are in the middle of a series, our last series of season three, which is the Sabbath. And in today's episode, we are gonna get very practical and we're gonna help you create a Sabbath reset in your marriage.

Kyle Almodovar 3:38

So we'll

Why Sabbath Matters In Marriage

Kyle Almodovar 3:39

go but we'll let's start with the why. Why Sabbath, right? Yes. Why Sabbath? I think why Sabbath, my answer to why Sabbath is because it helps us to be holy.

Selina Almodovar 3:48

Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 3:48

Right?

Selina Almodovar 3:49

Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 3:49

I don't when we record these, I don't always remember the end of the conversation.

Selina Almodovar 3:54

Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 3:54

From last week.

Selina Almodovar 3:55

Yeah, yeah, sure.

Kyle Almodovar 3:56

But Sabbath helps us to be holy. God called us to be holy, to be separated from the world, to be separated from non-believers, to be separated as worshipers. Right. So my big why on Sabbath is to worship. Right. And that's why we like to attend Sunday service.

Selina Almodovar 4:12

To set apart the works and to put in place worship. And our Sunday.

Kyle Almodovar 4:18

And we we pour out to our ministries on Sundays. And because it's worship, right? Yeah. It's Sabbath, it resets, it helps my spirit, like we talked about in the open in this episode. Yes. It resets my spiritual uh, I guess it just recenters, right?

Selina Almodovar 4:33

Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 4:33

For me spiritually for the week. And I like it on Sunday. Um I'm a big Monday person. And so I love having my Sabbath on Space.

Selina Almodovar 4:41

Kyle loves Mondays, guys. He loves Mondays.

Kyle Almodovar 4:45

I like the the newness of the week. It's definitely. I like that you're you're you're oh and oh. There's no wins, no losses, right? It's a new season.

Selina Almodovar 4:53

Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 4:53

We can go out, we can go one and oh each day. Okay. And I love that about Monday. Okay. Love that about Monday.

Selina Almodovar 4:58

You know, that's that's that's I love that for you. Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 5:02

It's not for everybody, I understand. I love that for you, Cut. I love me some Monday.

Selina Almodovar 5:05

Okay. Love you some Monday. That's that's wonderful.

Kyle Almodovar 5:08

Give us your give us your uh your why the Sabbath.

Selina Almodovar 5:11

I I know in the previous episode, and if you haven't listened to the beginning of the Sabbath uh series, please go back and listen to last week's episode where we do talk about the symptoms of not having a Sabbath. And one of the things that we discovered in that episode is that when you don't have a Sabbath, you're essentially sinning because it was one of the commandments and to not follow in what God has already called you to do, which is to take rest each week.

Kyle Almodovar 5:35

Right.

Selina Almodovar 5:36

That is leading you to a life where you're being disobedient to God. And so when you're disobedient of God, obviously that's sin, right? And so we talked a lot about how we're not only supposed to be encouraged to do this, but we are commanded to do this. And so why do we have a Sabbath? We're doing it number one, because God told us to. Number two, like you said, because we are being set apart from the rest of the world. We are not living on a go, go, go mentality that we have it in our own strength to be able to do it all in our own strength. We have to rest, we have to be refueled, and we have to go back to the presence of God, which is where that worship comes in. And something that we talked about in last week's episode is that it is all based on the heart condition. Because, you know, there are people who are going to ministry and who are in ministry positions and who are leaders of their church or their house or their jobs, and they find it upon themselves where they are doing the work and they feel like they have to not give up the time because it would affect their work.

Kyle Almodovar 6:38

Okay.

Selina Almodovar 6:39

You know, and so it was a matter of trusting in time and and saying, I don't need to sit down, I don't need to rest, I don't need to reflect because I have too much work to do. And sometimes that can get carried into a ministry position. Sometimes people are so fixated on just going to church, serving the church, serving the people that they forget that they should rest. They forget that they need to reconnect. Remember, that was something we talked about last week was when you do a Sabbath in a marriage, you are you we are encouraging you to do it together with your spouse so that you can be connected together. Because if you don't, if you do it in two opposite times of the week, then you end up missing each other. You end up missing that connection. And so that was something that we we really honed in. And so I'm trying to reiterate everything we talked about to kind of help you understand like that was the whys that we shared last week, and that was the that's still my why today.

Kyle Almodovar 7:34

Okay.

Planning As Rest And Worship

Kyle Almodovar 7:35

So I was watching you today, right? Today I think of as our Sabbath. Okay. Sunday while we're we're recording this on a Sunday.

Selina Almodovar 7:40

Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 7:41

And I was watching you, and I was thinking through your going through your uh not your schedule book, not your calendar. It's a planner.

Selina Almodovar 7:49

My planner.

Kyle Almodovar 7:50

Your planner. Yeah, and you're putting in all this stuff and you're organizing all this stuff. It's like a big brain dump.

Selina Almodovar 7:55

Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 7:56

That doesn't feel like work to you?

Selina Almodovar 7:57

No.

Kyle Almodovar 7:57

Does that feel like worship to you?

Selina Almodovar 7:59

It feels like, okay, God, here's what I have going on. Yeah. Get me in the right mindset for this. Get me in the right heart space for this. Because now I'd am not waking up anxious.

Kyle Almodovar 8:13

Okay.

Selina Almodovar 8:13

I'm not waking up confused. I'm not waking up forgetting things. I'm not waking up on the go trying to tackle, okay, what do I have to do? Okay, I'm gonna think on my feet. I like to plan it out and I like to see like this is what I have going on. Oh, this is a big thing I need to prepare for. Lord, help me figure out the rest of this week. So, for example, when when we are recording today's episode, I am preparing for a friend's wedding at the end of the week. Okay. So I know that I have some points on my heart that, you know, these are the things I really want to take care of this week. These are the things that I have going on this week. This is the time that I'm spending with my kids. This is the time that I'm spending with Kyle. These are these are the pockets I can see where I can go to the gym. To me, I feel like a gym is part of taking care of my temple. So I'm like, okay, I want to do this. Yeah, I'm gonna get this going. I don't want to overlook this. So now I'm thinking about this wedding. This is a very big deal at the end of my week.

Kyle Almodovar 9:10

Right.

Selina Almodovar 9:11

So I'm asking God, what do I need to do to be my best version of myself in this week?

Kyle Almodovar 9:17

Okay.

Selina Almodovar 9:18

And I really, and I, as I'm planning this, I really felt like God was saying, you know, leave Friday open. Don't plan work, don't plan this. Leave Friday open so that you're prepared for the weekend. Leave Friday open so that you can rest, so that you can um come in with a clean headspace, so that you're not going into a big event anxious or stressed or overworked or overburdened or tired. Go in there with good energy. And I was like, okay, I because I started doing things, you know, I had two other things that I wanted to do. And I said, no, this doesn't. I I started to exercise wisdom. I guess that's the best way to say it. When I'm planning, yeah, I'm doing it with God because I'm I'm trying to exercise wisdom in how my week is gonna go, yeah, so that I know when to rest and I know how my rest is gonna affect the rest of the things going on.

Kyle Almodovar 10:08

Amen.

Selina Almodovar 10:09

Short answer.

Kyle Almodovar 10:10

Amen. So for someone who like me, like you said you don't you don't understand how I got to Lycan Mondays like I do.

Selina Almodovar 10:16

I mean, I've I knew I see it, but it's it's definitely your thing.

Kyle Almodovar 10:22

I could never sit down and say, Oh, I'm gonna worship right now and fill out a planner. Like that would not be like that. That creates more anxiety in me to sit down and write out like we're two different types. I know what's this gonna look like. That's my whole point. Yeah.

Selina Almodovar 10:35

Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 10:36

As I couldn't just sit down and write out, what does my wake look like? Look for these gaps. Because by the end of that, I'm so like overwhelmed. This is I'm so this is stupid. Put this planner away. Like, yeah, it'll be what it'll be.

Selina Almodovar 10:46

Yeah.

Kyle Almodovar 10:47

My point is that different people have different styles of Sabbath. Yes, right. The Sabbath is gonna look different for each person. Yes, right. So because Kyle's taking his Sunday nap and enjoying his Sabbath, let's talk about this. Does not mean that Selena's not enjoying her Sabbath when she's filling out her planner.

Selina Almodovar 11:03

Let's talk about

Kyle’s Ideal Sunday Sabbath Rhythm

Selina Almodovar 11:04

this. So, what is your ideal Sabbath look like?

Kyle Almodovar 11:08

Uh, wake up early. Like early by early, I mean ahead of the kids, get my coffee in. Okay. That's when I that's like my everyday Jesus time. Yes. Coffee before the kids.

Selina Almodovar 11:16

Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 11:17

Right? So I get that in, and then the kids wake up, I make them breakfast. I love making Sunday breakfast. We always go heavy protein because we're going to church. Right. So I go, love making the Sabbath.

Selina Almodovar 11:27

So going to church. So your Sabbath is typically your ideal Sabbath is on a Sunday.

Kyle Almodovar 11:31

Ideal Sabbath is on a Sunday. Okay. Thousand percent. Okay. Go to church. And after church, you know, hang out, chit-chat with friends. Yeah. Whatever it's gonna be.

Selina Almodovar 11:40

You got some fellowship going on.

Kyle Almodovar 11:42

We could have an um after lunch appointment, whether it's coffee with somebody or a couple coming over to hang out at our house on Sunday. Okay. That kind of stuff.

Selina Almodovar 11:51

So that's just fellowship. It's not like mentoring or any of that. Any premarital thing. Connecting with children. Just connecting.

Kyle Almodovar 11:57

Okay. In a in a deep, in a real way where we talk about spiritual life. Okay. It's definitely a win.

Selina Almodovar 12:03

Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 12:04

Visiting our relatives on a Sunday. 100%. Feels like Sabbath. That's your Sabbath. Chill. Put my feet up. Watch the race with Uncle Joe. Love that.

Selina Almodovar 12:12

Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 12:13

That's that's a NASCAR formula.

Selina Almodovar 12:15

Any of it. All of it.

Kyle Almodovar 12:16

Any of it. Right. Watch a basketball game. Okay. Cavs in the playoffs. No calves. Loving it. Yes. Football. Just family time.

Selina Almodovar 12:23

Family time.

Kyle Almodovar 12:24

Right.

Selina Almodovar 12:25

Friends, family, fellowship time is considered part of your Sabbath. Ideal tablet. Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 12:31

And then there's no nap in there, by the way. You haven't the nap happens in the middle of all that. In the middle of something? Outside of the I've seen that happen a lot. Yes. Outside of the family and fellowship. But like when I'm at home and it's just me watching the race. You're watching your eyes. Sometimes the race is watching me. Yes.

Selina Almodovar 12:46

Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 12:47

Sometimes the basketball game's watching me. Got it. Fall asleep in the third inning, wake up in the seventh inning. Never been a problem.

Selina Almodovar 12:53

Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 12:54

Right? Okay. Love that for me.

Selina Almodovar 12:55

Okay. I love that for you. Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 12:57

And uh then a good dinner. Like we we do a nice home cooked Sunday.

Selina Almodovar 13:02

Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 13:02

Today I was on the grill. Yeah. It was awesome.

Selina Almodovar 13:05

Yeah.

Kyle Almodovar 13:06

And uh get the kids to bed a decent time. Oh, the family walk. Dude, we did that family walk today with the dog and the good weather. I love that.

Selina Almodovar 13:15

Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 13:15

That is definitely part of my reset for the week.

Selina Almodovar 13:18

So it sounds to me like your ideal Sabbath, Kyle's ideal Sabbath, involves a lot of fellowship with close loved ones.

Kyle Almodovar 13:28

Yeah.

Selina Almodovar 13:28

Whether that's friends, whether that's family, whether that's immediate family. Yep.

Kyle Almodovar 13:32

The kids. Okay. Yep. Fill up my love tank.

Selina Almodovar 13:35

Yeah.

Kyle Almodovar 13:35

Get my love tank filled up. Okay. So some and worship in the morning.

Selina Almodovar 13:38

And worship.

Kyle Almodovar 13:39

Love that.

Selina Almodovar 13:40

So some people are going to see Sabbath as connecting with loved ones and connecting with the father.

Kyle Almodovar 13:46

Yeah.

Selina Almodovar 13:46

Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 13:47

Yeah. That's that's a thousand percent.

Selina Almodovar 13:48

And you feel rested after all that.

Kyle Almodovar 13:50

After all this today, I feel so rested.

Selina Almodovar 13:52

You feel like I'm ready for my Monday.

Kyle Almodovar 13:55

Yeah. Okay.

Selina Almodovar 13:56

I feel like the Lord and I have And that is your ideal Sabbath.

Kyle Almodovar 14:00

That's a good ideal Sabbath. Yeah. I'm good for that.

Selina Almodovar 14:03

Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 14:03

To bed at a decent time at night? Yes. Right.

Selina Almodovar 14:05

Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 14:06

Amen. Okay. That's mine.

Selina Almodovar 14:08

So I will share. Let's hear yours.

Kyle Almodovar 14:10

Let's hear your ideal Sabbath, Selena.

Partner With The Ministry

Selina Almodovar 14:12

What's up, love by faith family? We want to say thank you so much for your support and watching and engaging in every single episode that we have put out thus far. We could not have made it this far without you.

Kyle Almodovar 14:23

That's right. And we want to grow more. We want to create new resources. We want to increase our reach and we want to provide more for you guys. But the only way to make that happen is for you to come alongside and partner with us to sow a seed into this ministry to help it grow.

Selina Almodovar 14:38

Because at the end of the day, it's not about getting new equipment or putting out new resources. It's about expanding the kingdom. It's about creating godly marriages. And we can do that if you partner alongside us with your financial support. There's a link below that you can click on. You can contribute one time or you can partner with us on a monthly basis and help us sow a seed so that love by faith can continue to grow and reach the masses.

Kyle Almodovar 15:05

If you want to see this ministry grow, follow the link below and thank you. We thank you for giving and for being just part of this journey with us.

Selina Almodovar 15:13

So that together we can love by faith.

Kyle Almodovar 15:17

Love by faith, y'all.

Selina Almodovar 15:21

You said you weren't gonna do the joke.

Kyle Almodovar 15:22

That's not a joke. It's a catchphrase.

Selina Almodovar 15:28

That's not a catch- Can you please just use the link and click below and we would be grateful. In Jesus' name.

Kyle Almodovar 15:36

Amen. So Selena. Yes. Before before the break, yeah. You brought in what your ideal Sabbath looks like. What does your ideal Sabbath look like, Selena?

Selina’s Ideal Sabbath For Real Rest

Selina Almodovar 15:44

So I feel like my ideal Sabbath is a little different than yours because you were very involved with connecting with people. And I don't know if I I wouldn't say I'm an introvert. I wouldn't say I'm an extrovert, but they have this thing in between where it's like you're an extroverted introvert.

Kyle Almodovar 16:04

Yeah.

Selina Almodovar 16:04

Okay. I think that I think I said it right. And I feel like I feel like I'm that person. I feel like yes, I connect with people, but I really get rest when I'm by myself.

Kyle Almodovar 16:17

Okay.

Selina Almodovar 16:17

When I'm alone and it's quiet and I'm not around people because a lot of the times when I'm around people, I feel like I have to host. I feel like I I have to cook or I have to, you know, have people in my home, so I gotta clean. And I don't necessarily see that as rest. You get very Martha when people are around. I get very Martha before, and I get very Martha after. And I I like to be present when people are there. You know, I put my phone away, I don't clean, I don't think about it. Yeah. But the before and the after, it becomes work for me because I'm taking care of my home and then I gotta take care of my kids and I gotta do all these things.

Kyle Almodovar 16:54

Okay.

Selina Almodovar 16:54

And so I don't feel like that's necessarily something that I look for. So for my ideal Sabbath, okay, I would like to think also on a Sunday because I want all of my work to be completely done before Sunday. I don't want to have to meal prep on Sunday. I don't want to have to look at my planner on a Sunday.

Kyle Almodovar 17:14

What do you mean you don't have to look at your planner on a Sunday? We just talked about you writing in your planner on a Sunday.

Selina Almodovar 17:18

Yes. Typically, I would like to do all of the prep on Saturday. I love planning, but I would like to do all of the prep on Saturday.

Kyle Almodovar 17:26

Okay.

Selina Almodovar 17:27

So that on Sunday I can go to church, I can enjoy that. I can come home. I can put on my sweatpants, my little fuzzy flannel pants, and my bleach stained sweatshirt. Okay. There everybody has one. You know where yours is right now. I like to throw that on. Put my hair in a top knot. And I like to chill. I like to chill. I like to sip on some tea that I'm like, ooh, that looks good. I should try that sometime. And I say this during the week and I never have time to do it. Like, I want my sa Sunday to be the day where I get to self-care.

Kyle Almodovar 18:04

Is Sunday your ideal Sabbath day?

Selina Almodovar 18:06

Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 18:07

Okay.

Selina Almodovar 18:07

Sunday is my ideal Sabbath day. I like when the kids are outside playing it outside and we're chilling on the deck with our third cup of coffee and we're just cup of tea. My first cup of tea because it's fancy, right? And I don't get to sip it ever all week long. And sometimes I like to just watch some shows because we don't get to watch shows all day long. And sometimes I like to do more of my reading plan and like really just read because nobody's bothering me. And I get to read books on Sunday or I get to read my Bible a little bit more on Sunday. I get to go deeper in that on Sunday. Sometimes I like to go for those walks. And sometimes I like to, if it's a one-on-one interaction, am I mentoring somebody? Or if it's just my friend and we're just kicking it, you know, and we're just eating some sourdough bread and some jam and we're just chopping it up about how is your day, how is your season? You know, I don't feel like I'm hosting in that space. And so that feels really nice. Or sometimes I leave the house completely and I'm able to just be Selena, that's not a host. I'm just hanging out with a friend and I'm just catching up. Like to me, that's a good Sabbath. Coming home and that's good. And dinner is dinner. I feel like the end of the day is always the same every single day. We have to cook, we have to make sure kids eat, we have to clean up the kitchen, we have to feed the dog, we have to walk the dog, we have to prep for bed. That routine has never changed.

Kyle Almodovar 19:33

I would counter that and say that we usually make a more Sunday-esque meal.

Selina Almodovar 19:39

You are usually helping because you're present because it's a Sunday. So that is a little more helpful to me. That's a little more Sabbath. It feels a little more slower. Yeah. We're able to eat and we're able to do these things together. Yeah. I love sitting on our couch and just talking to you. Like to me, those are Sabbath-ish things. And then, of course, like the bedtime routine of, you know, the skincare and the prepping before the new day and you know, getting all that and going to bed on time. Everybody in our house does not argue on Sunday. Everybody's just whooped from the weekend and they're like, all right, we're going to bed good night. School's tomorrow. Good night. And that's that's beautiful for me. So that's what I feel like my ideal Sabbath would be. Planning is awesome. I love planning.

Kyle Almodovar 20:27

Okay.

Selina Almodovar 20:27

But usually planning requires prepping afterwards. You know, prepping meals, prepping hair, you know, for hair care, prepping my my day, you know, prepping, you know, whatever, whatever. So I feel like the prepping then can sometimes become work. If I don't have time to do the planning on Saturday, I definitely do it on Sunday, but I'm going in with a mindset of like I'm going to have to prep things the following day on Monday. So I would prefer to do it on Saturday, but you know, it's there when it's there.

Kyle Almodovar 20:58

So thinking along the lines of planning and prepping on Sunday, when we put out the new play in the playbook for the super special Sabbath, whatever all the S's words were that we said it was going to be.

Selina Almodovar 21:10

Yeah.

Kyle Almodovar 21:10

The spectacular Sabbath setup.

Selina Almodovar 21:12

Oh, I like that. Spectacular Sabbath setup.

Kyle Almodovar 21:15

When

Build Your Spectacular Sabbath Setup

Kyle Almodovar 21:16

we do the spectacular Sabbath setup, yeah. What are some things that we're going to have people brainstorm through?

Selina Almodovar 21:20

So we're definitely going to talk about the vision because we mentioned that in the last episode. Right. We're going to say, you know, what do you want your ideal Sabbath to look like? And that's the kind of the reason why we just had this conversation.

Kyle Almodovar 21:30

So, like a hypothesis statement at the top. My ideal Sabbath feels like or looks like.

Selina Almodovar 21:36

Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 21:37

Okay.

Selina Almodovar 21:37

And I think it's very important that both spouses do this individually because as you can see, Kyle has something completely different from mine. And if we were to try to go based on one or the other plan, yeah, I would have been drained from meeting all our people and going with family and taking care of kids at the family's house and blah blah blah. And you would have felt, you know, like you had to be on kid duty because I left or something. Something happened.

Kyle Almodovar 22:00

And I will sideline and say that when we first got married, I used to think like we had to be together all day Sunday, right? And now it's way like no, I'm I'm going to Uncle Joe's. I'll take the boys or I'll take the one kid who wants to go.

Selina Almodovar 22:11

Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 22:12

And we could just do our own thing.

Selina Almodovar 22:13

We felt obligated to have to go to every family outing. And sometimes that's not always the case.

Kyle Almodovar 22:19

Or or not even to go to the family outing, but like we had to do something together on Sunday because I was working six days a week. And so doing that something on Sunday was the day where I was around all the time.

Selina Almodovar 22:30

Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 22:30

And so now that that's more balanced with me having off Saturday and Sunday, working that into our plan where I am able to go on whatever, go by myself and go to Uncle Jones, go on a bicycle ride with the kids. Like that's that works, right?

Selina Almodovar 22:44

And so that's a little sideline of uh it's a good practice too to understand what your individual Sabbath, individual ideal Sabbath would look like.

Kyle Almodovar 22:53

Yeah.

Selina Almodovar 22:54

Because some people would think I want to sleep in, I want to go to the last service possible, I want to come home and take a nap. Like they see rest as rest. Like I'm doing nothing but paying more attention to my bed and my pillow. Right. You know, or I'm doing nothing but worshiping and praying, and we're gonna do group prayer, or you know, I want to be able to have a prayer and worship moment just with my spouse in the morning. Like that, you need to really understand like what is their definition of work and what is their definition of rest, and what is their definition of connection with God? Amen. And how can you merge that in some way?

Kyle Almodovar 23:32

Yeah.

Selina Almodovar 23:33

So you were talking about, you know, being together with friends and family, like that's your ideal fa Sabbath, making breakfast for the kids, going to church. You know, you mentioned all these things about you, and I mentioned all these things about me, but we didn't mention anything that we did together on a Sabbath. So, as an example for the people listening and watching, you know, Kyle, what are some things that you and I do together that would constitute as a weekly Sabbath in our Sabbath day?

Kyle Almodovar 24:00

Yeah, definitely get that dog walk in. Yeah. That's all that's the first one that comes to mind. So we we go to church, right? But we don't just go to church, we serve together. When we're doing a ministry, we're on the ministry team together. We we don't have like some couples, and even when we were younger and we had young kids where we had to alternate, like mom Sunday would be first Sunday and Dad Sunday would be third Sunday, right? And so now we've come to a place where we're we're doing it together, we're serving on the same Sunday, yeah. Yeah, or so we're not at separate services.

Selina Almodovar 24:32

Yeah.

Kyle Almodovar 24:32

And that that sitting together during service is a big, big thing that we do together on Saturday.

Selina Almodovar 24:38

Yes. Going to church and serving together and then listening to the word together. Something that I think we always do that we don't we don't realize it, but we do it every Sabbath is we always sit on the couch and we always talk. Whether it's right after church, we, you know, we have lunch and we have that cup of coffee together, or it's fancy tea, you know, or right after dinner, yeah. When the kids are just kind of playing together and they're kind of running out their last bit of energy, like we're always sitting together, just talking. We don't have an agenda, we don't have, you know, a reporting meeting. This is what we got to talk about, like this is what we have to figure out for the kids or for finances. Like we are just sitting and just chatting.

Kyle Almodovar 25:20

So a good husband and wife connection time.

Selina Almodovar 25:22

Yeah. And we do it every time we have a day off. Every time we have that Sabbath day, we are connecting, whether it's in the early afternoon or the early evening, we're hanging out. Even in the mornings, if we wake up early enough and the kids are out because it's really hot, it's a summer season. We're on the deck and we're sipping on our coffee and we're just enjoying each other's company. And I think that that is huge for our Sabbath.

Kyle Almodovar 25:48

It reminds me of the verse in Ecclesiastes that we go back to where the three strand cord not easily broken. Reminds me of that in that it gets tighter. We're pulling that knot tighter of you and me and God when we do that. And it inspires me that in our spectacular Sabbath setup page, to have a aspirational like scripture of what Sabbath could look like.

Selina Almodovar 26:14

Yeah.

Kyle Almodovar 26:15

Right? What's your what your scripture are you leaning into for the Sabbath to feel to feel like a Sabbath?

Selina Almodovar 26:20

That's good. Right. That's good.

Kyle Almodovar 26:22

And so I would I would put that verse and say that the why behind that verse is so that we can have that bonded, tight feeling between you, me, and the Holy Spirit.

Selina Almodovar 26:30

That's great.

Kyle Almodovar 26:31

And so yeah, I would add that to the to the super Sabbath structure.

Selina Almodovar 26:35

So for the super Sabbath, spectacular. Spectacular. Spectacular Sabbath structure. Um, so we let's talk about this. So we talked about our ideal Sabbath, what that looks like as individuals. Right. We talked about from looking at those two things, you're identifying what rest looks like, what work looks like, what connection with God looks like. You're creating a scripture that you guys can use that would bring you guys together. A grounding scripture. You have a grounding scripture, and then you're coming up with the activities or the items that you can do in your Sabbath together to help you connect, whether that's taking a nap, whether that's going on a walk, whether that's having a conversation, whether that's cooking together, whether that is, you know, relations, you know, like that's something that you see as getting filled and getting as part of your Sabbath. You know, whatever the case may be, coming at the end of this resource and at the end of your reset should be we have an agreement that together we are going to rest and connect with God on a weekly basis by doing these things.

Kyle Almodovar 27:41

And I would have, lastly, a no-fly list, like a no-go for Sabbath. Like this is not Sabbath.

Selina Almodovar 27:48

Because it constitutes as work or just not rest.

Kyle Almodovar 27:51

Right. Outside of my weekly reset with God and have have some space to brainstorm that so that you don't so you don't accidentally put in stuff or that like your partner can know. Like if you're asking him to rake the leaves on Sunday, yes, you're crossing the boundary.

Selina Almodovar 28:06

Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 28:07

Right. If I'm asking you to I don't know what it is, I'm just gonna make an example up that's arbitrary, to fill the dishwasher or empty the dishwasher on Sunday morning. Yeah. Like and you're like, no, that's on my no fly list.

Selina Almodovar 28:20

Like, I'm not doing that. You're planning a party and it just happens to fall on this day.

Kyle Almodovar 28:26

We did Jubilee's birthday party on a Sunday.

Selina Almodovar 28:28

We did.

Kyle Almodovar 28:29

But we were off on Monday. We did. And there was no there was no school on Monday. Yes. And so like we we got we talked about that deep before we made that move.

Selina Almodovar 28:37

Yes. Yes. Because we didn't want to we don't want to do a lot of things. Yeah.

Kyle Almodovar 28:42

That's good.

Selina Almodovar 28:42

Um, I don't know, man.

Kyle Almodovar 28:43

I I feel like practically all those steps we talked about into the spectacular Sabbath setup would really be good ways to clear your mind and say, this is my Sabbath statement. Yeah. Sabbath is when blah, blah, blah.

Selina Almodovar 28:57

I think I think we covered all of it in this episode. You know, we talked about why, yeah, what your why should be for having a Sabbath. We talked about what your ideal would look like for having a Sabbath. We talked about the definitions of what is a Sabbath and what's not a Sabbath, according to each of you guys. We talked about how is this tying to scripture? How is this tying us together? We talked about this is what it should not look like. And from all of those points, you should have a really good concrete idea. You should have a pretty good setup, should be a setup that's actually pretty spectacular, if you ask me, you know. So we hope that this encourages you. We hope that this edifies you, and we hope that this helps you grow. Because the fact of the matter is having a Sabbath on a weekly basis is not something that we think is a good idea that you should do. This is not our idea. This is God's idea. We just want to be obedient to the Lord, okay? And we want you to be obedient to the Lord, because when you're obedient to the Lord, good things happen. Amen. Blessings in the Lord. Blessings come. That's right. Rust comes, connection comes, things happen. Okay. So don't take it from us. Right. Please take it from the Holy Spirit. Okay. And if you have questions about the Sabbath, if you have concerns about the Sabbath, if you have restrictions that this is just not going to work with my schedule, you don't understand. I get it. Ask those questions to the Holy Spirit and ask those questions in your next prayer session with your spouse. Okay. I'm pretty sure God will answer you. He will reveal things to you. He will shed light on his scriptures. He will help you understand. He will put people in place for you. He will make it so so that you can understand why this is important and what happens when you are faithful and obedient to his work. Amen.

Kyle Almodovar 30:43

It's just our pastor always says this in fasting. Fasting doesn't change God.

Selina Almodovar 30:47

Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 30:48

Fasting changes you.

Selina Almodovar 30:49

Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 30:50

The Sabbath doesn't change where God is, what God's doing. The Sabbath changes where your heart is.

Selina Almodovar 30:55

Amen.

Kyle Almodovar 30:56

What you're what you're doing.

Selina Almodovar 30:58

Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 30:59

And so that would be my last encouragement in this episode for it. The Sabbath doesn't change God, right? It changes you.

Selina Almodovar 31:06

And so if you want to get that spectacular Sabbath setup, please go to the Love by Faith Couples Playbook. It is a completely free resource. This is just going to be one of the extra resources that is going to be added to an already jam-packed resource book. You can grab the link in the description below if you have not already. This is completely free. We're making this resource for you for free because we want to be able to help you in some way, shape, or form. And we think this is a great way to help you with your Sabbath. So grab that link in the description. Download this free resource today. You can click on the link that says spectacular Sabbath setup. Are you going to do it? And then you'll get your you'll get this particular resource in your hands.

Prayer Then Practical Next Steps

Kyle Almodovar 31:50

Amen. Let's pray for the people. Amen. Lord Jesus, we thank you that you continue to show up in our podcast, that your Holy Spirit is at work here. We pray for all those who are struggling with Sabbath, who are struggling with rest, who are struggling with reset and letting go to let you handle the business, to let you handle the recovery, to let you handle the next steps, Lord. We pray for their hearts. We pray for their minds, Lord. We pray for their bodies that they would be fully surrendered to you and your will in this time, Lord. We pray that we would live by what we we would practice what we preach, Lord. We know we're not perfect. We know we were working on this in our lives too. And we give you the glory for all that you're doing in our lives and through our podcast and through the lives of those who are listening and who are applying and who are seeking you, Lord. In Jesus' name. Amen.

Selina Almodovar 32:41

Amen. Thank you guys so much for listening and tuning in to Love by Faith with Kyle and Selena Almadovar. If this is your first time listening or watching, please like, share, and subscribe if you're on YouTube, or go ahead and leave us a review. You could even share with us how this episode helped you, and that will help us spread the news to couples like you all around the world.

Kyle Almodovar 33:01

That's right. Don't just think by faith. Don't just walk by faith. Love by faith.

Selina Almodovar 33:05

We'll see you guys next week, and we will wrap up this series of the Sabbath.

Kyle Almodovar 33:10

Love by faith, y'all.

Selina Almodovar 33:12

Bye.

Kyle Almodovar 33:17

What's

No Fly List And The Walmart Debate

Kyle Almodovar 33:18

on your no Sabbath no fly list?

Selina Almodovar 33:26

What is on my Sabbath no fly list? Um being out of the house all day.

Kyle Almodovar 33:37

All day?

Selina Almodovar 33:37

All day. Like if I'm if I leave the house at 10 or 9 for church, and then I'm coming home at 4 p.m., bro, that is not a Sabbath for me. That is not a I I did not rest.

Kyle Almodovar 33:52

It's good. This is fair. I am gonna go with this gonna sound crazy. Okay. I'm gonna go with the grocery store.

Selina Almodovar 34:00

Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 34:00

Anywhere I gotta buy groceries? Okay. I'm not Sabbathing.

Selina Almodovar 34:04

If you're just the grocery store, like what if it's Target?

Kyle Almodovar 34:07

Yeah, no, it's different.

Selina Almodovar 34:08

Oh, what? What? What about Walmart? You're gonna go to Walmart and call that a Sabbath? You're gonna call Walmart fishing section?

Kyle Almodovar 34:16

Am I going to buy lures? I might be all right.

Selina Almodovar 34:19

Walmart is the trenches. I can't. I'm not I'm not gonna choose to go. Going to a parking lot is not a Sabbath for me. Oh if I have to wait in a parking lot, whether that's for an order or for you to run in and out, I'm like, I don't want to be here. Get me out of here.

Kyle Almodovar 34:37

Family feud question. 100 people answered. What is the last thing you want to do on the Sabbath? Go to Walmart. Number one answer.

Selina Almodovar 34:45

Go to Walmart. Number one answer. Good answer. Good answer. Good answer. Everybody says. Yeah, man. I don't want to do that. What was your? You said the you said the grocery store.

Kyle Almodovar 34:55

I said the grocery store. That's it. You you took it up a notch to Walmart, yeah. I don't think that's a good one. That's just my quick no-fly list is that.

Selina Almodovar 35:03

I can't. I can't do Walmart on a Sabbath. That is so work.

Kyle Almodovar 35:10

I gotta go.

Selina Almodovar 35:12

Then you have Apple Pay, bro.