When Christian Couples Need Sabbaticals | Love By Faith with Kyle & Selina Almodovar #109

We get honest about long-term sabbaticals and why stepping down can be one of the most loving things we do for our marriage, our family, and our spiritual life. 

We share our own burnout seasons, what we wish we did sooner, and how to build a rhythm of rest that keeps us connected to God and each other. 

• why a sabbatical works like a fast from what is draining you 
• our 2020 reset after renovation and nonstop pressure 
• why grief and overload often require a bigger pause 
• how we returned to church slowly and stayed off leadership for a season 
• the best seasons to take a sabbatical: newlywed transition, new baby postpartum, loss, job change, moving 
• why rest does not make you less of a leader but a better one 
• how to test a real 24-hour Sabbath and listen for God’s restoration 
• why true rest comes from Christ, not just time off 

Transcript

Sabbath Series Wrap And Big Rest

Kyle Almodovar 0:00

Today we're talking about the sabbatical part of Sabbath, the long term Sabbath, the ones where I need to step away, step down, step out of the way. Sit just down chill.

Selina Almodovar 0:10

How can couples know when it's the right season to take a sabbatical?

Kyle Almodovar 0:15

If you say can look at yourself and say, No, I don't need a Sabbath and believe that, I think you're lying to yourself.

Selina Almodovar 0:20

It doesn't mean that you're less of a leader. It means that you want to become a better leader. We're not perfect people. By any means. But by trusting in God, we learned what it takes to build a friendship, a relationship, and marriage that has stood the test of time.

Kyle Almodovar 0:37

With a keeping it real style, we're gonna talk to you about everything that we've been through, are going through, and have overcome all by learning how to lean on God and each other.

Selina Almodovar 0:50

In order to help you learn how to love by faith. How they address me when the five-year-old is like, bruh.

Kyle Almodovar 1:22

Bruh.

Selina Almodovar 1:24

I can't, I can't keep it together.

Kyle Almodovar 1:26

She's always like, literally, dad. It's literally broken. Okay, daughter. It's literally broken.

Selina Almodovar 1:32

We're gonna have to learn some Gen Z language.

Kyle Almodovar 1:34

You can learn Gen Z language. We're gonna have to to keep it. Stick with what I know. Keep good the good old millennial cool. It's just gonna be an old dad's sweet. That's sweet.

Selina Almodovar 1:42

All that in a bag of chips. Your mama.

Kyle Almodovar 1:47

Oh man.

Selina Almodovar 1:48

Anyways, welcome to Love by Faith. We're your hosts, Selina and Kyle Almadovar. And we are at the end of our last series of season three. We are here talking about the Sabbath.

Kyle Almodovar 2:00

Oh, it's so crazy. Dude, it's it is so crazy how fast these seasons go.

Selina Almodovar 2:05

And I think in our last episode, which will come out next week, we're gonna talk just plainly about our season, our experience, the podcast. So we definitely want you to come around for that. But for today, we're gonna wrap up this series of the Sabbath. If you haven't listened to the last two episodes, uh, please go back and listen to that. The first one was talking about the symptoms of the Sabbath, what happens when you don't take one, and then we busted out with the following uh episode about how to have the best Sabbath reset, how to practically apply it. We gave you guys a free resource along with that called the let me make sure I get this right. The spectacular Sabbath setup. Yes, coined by Kyle himself. What a genius title that is.

Kyle Almodovar 2:49

A little alliteration goes a long way.

Selina Almodovar 2:51

A little alliteration goes a long way.

Kyle Almodovar 2:53

A little alliteration goes a long way.

Selina Almodovar 2:55

A little alliteration anyway. Yeah. So we hope you get that. We hope you download that. It is in our playbook, uh, our couples playbook link. You can grab that link in the description below and enjoy that, along with all of the other resources that we have compiled for you throughout our podcast experience. And so today we talked about the problems of the Sabbath. We talked about how to set up a Sabbath. What are we talking about today, Kai?

Kyle Almodovar 3:17

Today we're talking about the sabbatical part of Sabbath, the long-term Sabbath, the ones where I need to step away, step down, step out of the way, sit just down, chill. Those kind of Sabbaths, the big Sabbath, the big capital Sabbath.

Selina Almodovar 3:30

Wow, I didn't know there was a capital and a lowercase sabbath.

Kyle Almodovar 3:34

I'm just gassing it up to sound good.

Selina Almodovar 3:36

They don't really talk in uh maybe they do. I I'm I'm gonna be ignorant here, but I I'm gonna ask for educational purposes only. Um, do they talk specifically in the Bible about a sabbatical?

Kyle Almodovar 3:48

No.

Selina Almodovar 3:49

Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 3:50

I would take it, uh, I would take that question and directly answer no. Okay.

Selina Almodovar 3:54

It's not like take three weeks off or it's not like the fourth commandment where it's like you must honor a Sabbath.

Sabbatical As A Fast From Burnout

Kyle Almodovar 4:00

Right.

Selina Almodovar 4:00

Okay, which was the weekly rest.

Kyle Almodovar 4:03

The sabbatical comes, I think the sabbatical comes from when you are so out of gas, it's it's akin to fasting. You are fasting from whatever was wearing you out.

Selina Almodovar 4:16

Wow, I like that.

Kyle Almodovar 4:19

You were fasting from whatever was wearing you out, and so the sabbatical is to reset in a major way, to rest and reset, and like kind of like in 2020, not on purpose, but we ended up taking a big sabbatical from the routine Sunday because our church kept going. Yeah, the church kept open as long as they could on Sundays, yes, and we took we took a step back and just said, Hey, we're take this opportunity and just time out for a while to just let it just let ourselves settle.

Selina Almodovar 4:49

Explain more about that story, like go more into detail about why we decided to do that.

Kyle Almodovar 4:54

So going into 2020, we had just finished renovating our house. We spent six months renovating six months where we were like ships in the night, just trying to get through each day and trying to stay connected as we could be through we literally renovating through Christmas, through Thanksgiving, Christmas, birthday, new year, and then finally moved in. Yeah, February 1st, right before your birthday. Yeah, then we went on vacation right away. We did, we went to Florida and Disney World right away after that, and then came home and the world shut down. Yes, right? Yeah, and so we were just go, go, go, go, go, and we needed the this this six-week sabbatical that the Lord sent through this crazy uh uh pandemic. But so the sabbatical there is is was a fast. It was a fast of our time, it was a fast of our energy, and so the setup for taking a sabbatical is the same setup as for fasting.

Selina Almodovar 5:52

Okay, walk us through that.

Kyle Almodovar 5:54

So I would say that the setup for fasting is to be intentional, yeah. Right? Set it up with your limits, know what you're fasting from, know what you're taking a sabbatical from.

Selina Almodovar 6:03

Yeah.

Kyle Almodovar 6:03

Because just because I'm taking a sabbatical from serving in this ministry doesn't mean I'm taking a sabbatical from serving in that ministry. Yeah. Just because I'm taking a sabbatical from, let's say coaching. I have a couple friends who are coaches, coach Little League, coach this thing year round, sport after sport for sport, coaching, coaching, coaching. The sabbatical, take a year off of coaching. Where I'm gonna take a year off a sabbatical from coaching for a year so I can reconnect with my wife. Yeah. Right? So I can reconnect and take care of my house. Okay. My house is uh is hit right now, and so I need to get out of that energy and get into this energy because I am not giving my all here.

Selina Almodovar 6:36

This reminds me of it's not one of the Ten Commandments, but it does remind me of the seven-year rest.

Kyle Almodovar 6:44

Yeah.

Selina Almodovar 6:44

I think it's found in Leviticus where they say, um, in the seventh year, no one is supposed to work on the land. No one is supposed to work in the field because you have to allow everything and everyone to rest for an entire year. That's great. And and it's what I think the Bible's I I have to I have to look it up, and so I'm I'm I'm I'm not sure if I'm gonna get this right or not, but I'm pretty sure that in the sixth year the the Lord will double their fruits and will double their provisions so that in the seventh year they can rest and they don't feel like they have to stress or strain or you know, squander what little resources that they have. They will, if they're doing it the right way and if they have the if they're exercising wisdom and obedience, then they're gonna have enough of the provision. But the Bible does say like after a period of time, there needs to be a long period of rest

Renovation Grief And Leadership Overload

Selina Almodovar 7:45

so that everyone can recover. And yes, we took that sabbatical in 2020 after the renovation. But if I am all the way honest, okay, I think looking back, you know, hindsight's 2020. You look at everything different when you see it with a fresh set of lenses and stuff. And I think we should have took that sabbatical way earlier because way earlier, way earlier in time, yes. We started, we took our sabbatical February 2020, right? But I believe we should have taken it when the moms left, when your mom passed and when my mom moved away, because I was two under two, I was having health issues, we were going through grief in in multiple layers of grief. Like my mother didn't die, but she was gone. And so there was a lot of emotional toil and physical toil. And then we had two younger children, you know, and then trying to get our feet back on steady ground, you know, with with your father, you know, helping him and with with with the kids at home. Like, I think that would have been a more wiser place to have a seat and to take a step down. And it's hard because I know when some people are going through grief, they want a distraction. They want to be like, no, I want to work. I don't need to take time off work. I don't even think you took time off work.

Kyle Almodovar 9:04

I took what I could. When my mom passed away, it was um, it was in an easier part of our cycle that in that company. Yeah. And so that was one where I was able to still grieve and be at peace because my workload wasn't so so strenuous.

Selina Almodovar 9:18

Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 9:18

And so that timing just worked out where I didn't need to step away from work.

Selina Almodovar 9:22

Yes. So I say all this to say that there are some uh couples and there's some people that are going through really hard things emotionally, physically, mentally, and they choose not to sit down when they should be sitting down to get the rest and to get poured into and to get filled and to get support. But instead, they're using this work and they're using their time as like a distraction to say, no, um, this is gonna help me get through it. I don't want to think about it. And I don't know if that's denial. I don't know if that's just healthy, I don't know if it's unhealthy. But I think for us personally, what we went through, I think we should have taken a step down in 2019 versus in early 2020 or 2018 going into 2019 when all of that happened. And the reason why I say that is because we were both leaders in multiple ministries.

Kyle Almodovar 10:11

Yeah, multiple ministries going hard.

Selina Almodovar 10:14

You know what I'm saying? And so from a ministry and a church standpoint, when your leaders are going through a lot and when they're heavy with burdens and with struggles and with trials, and then they're helping disciple others and they're, you know, it's one thing to serve and you're serving and you're getting poured into that serving, but it's another thing when you're having these obligations to to show up all the time and to be present all the time when you're actually not mentally and physically present. You know what I mean?

Kyle Almodovar 10:45

Oh man, that could be so it hurts everybody. Yeah. Because you're there, but you're not, you're checked out, or you're exactly you're giving it all at the church and in the ministry, but then your love life is struggling, or your friendships are struggling, and that is that is a huge hang up that I think a lot of leaders will probably deal with is knowing when to take rattle back and when to push forward.

Selina Almodovar 11:08

Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 11:08

That's good. That's a good good call out.

Selina Almodovar 11:10

Absolutely. And so we're we talked a little bit about our sabbatical. We talked a little bit about it mentioned in the Bible in in some shape or form. How can couples know when it's the right season to take a sabbatical?

Kyle Almodovar 11:24

I'll go back one step and ask you. You said we should have gone earlier. Okay. We shoulda, coulda, woulda. We should have, yeah. What was another good timing sabbatical that we took?

Selina Almodovar 11:34

Let me think about it. A good when it would when it would have been appropriate to take a sabbatical?

Kyle Almodovar 11:40

No, no, no. When did we actually take a sabbatical that you were like, oh, that was great. That was great for us. That was that was the perfect timing. Yes. Praise the Lord for giving us wisdom to do this.

Selina Almodovar 11:49

Yes, okay. In relation to the 2020, yeah. We didn't just take a sabbatical and sit down from church, like we left church, like we left our church. We moved and we didn't think that our schedule would accommodate it anymore. It didn't, with babies completely burnt out, and we just didn't feel personally like we were getting fed and filled in that season. And so we stopped going to this particular church. Okay. But then after I think after we had Jubilee, after she was about one, you know, maybe she was going on the verge of two. We were in a space where we were like, okay, it's time to go back to church. Which church do we go to? We didn't know if we should have gone to a different church, and the Lord brought us back home to our home church.

Kyle Almodovar 12:35

It was we started good going back in October of 21.

Selina Almodovar 12:40

Yeah.

Kyle Almodovar 12:41

Because I started taking like serious deep notes, and I have this super church note. And it was October of 21 where we seriously got back into church.

Selina Almodovar 12:48

Now, think about it like this. Um, our personal this is our personal story. We were leaders in our church. We stepped back and we stepped out. Yeah, we took a sabbatical to recover, and then we started going to other churches to fit our schedule, to fit our proximity of location, to fit, you know, nap schedules and our kids, what would work for them. And God brought us back to our home church.

Kyle Almodovar 13:18

Yeah.

Selina Almodovar 13:18

Now, when we came back to our home church after having the sabbatical and after stepping out of that church, we sat down. We did not expect to pick up where we left off in our leadership roles. We did not even join any ministries for a solid year. Could we have become leaders? We had the skill set, we had the experience, but we knew we still needed to sit down and we needed to start from square one. Yeah. And so taking a sabbatical, not necessarily from the church, but we sat from leadership roles. We sat from serving in a ministry position. We sat from leading small groups. We sat and completely just rested and got filled. And we needed that. And I think that was a right time to do it.

Kyle Almodovar 14:09

And it wasn't just like I said uh related to fasting, it wasn't done without uh purpose. Yes. We didn't go in there and say, Oh, we're just gonna, we're just gonna chill, we're just gonna take it easy and just take all the time.

Selina Almodovar 14:19

We're never gonna do it again. Yeah, we're never gonna step into seasons, yeah.

Kyle Almodovar 14:24

And receive, receive, receive. We knew we were gonna yeah. There was it was it was on hit it every time. It's honestly because we had a vision for how we wanted to roll back into church and how we wanted our family church experience.

Selina Almodovar 14:40

We wanted to do it different, yeah.

Kyle Almodovar 14:42

We had a mission there, yeah, we had a plan there, and well,

Returning To Church Without Burning Out

Kyle Almodovar 14:45

we'll get to that in the in the second part of the episode.

Selina Almodovar 14:47

Yeah, what's up, love by faith family? We want to say thank you so much for your support in watching and engaging in every single episode that we have put out thus far. We could not have made it this far without you.

Kyle Almodovar 14:59

That's right. And we want to grow more, we want to create new resources, we want to increase our reach, and we want to provide more for you guys. But the only way to make that happen is for you to come alongside and partner with us to sow a seed into this ministry to help it grow.

Selina Almodovar 15:14

Because at the end of the day, it's not about getting new equipment or putting out new resources, it's about expanding the kingdom, it's about creating godly marriages. Yes, and we can do that if you partner alongside us with your financial support. There's a link below that you can click on. You can contribute one time or you can partner with us on a monthly basis and help us sow a seed so that love by faith can continue to grow and reach the masses.

Kyle Almodovar 15:41

If you want to see this ministry grow, follow the link below and thank you. We thank you for giving and for being just part of this journey with us so that together we can love by faith. Love by faith, y'all.

Selina Almodovar 15:57

You said you weren't gonna do the joke.

Kyle Almodovar 15:59

That's not a joke.

Selina Almodovar 15:59

Love by faith is a joke.

Kyle Almodovar 16:01

Love by faith, y'all is not a joke.

Selina Almodovar 16:02

That's not our tagline.

Kyle Almodovar 16:04

It's a catchphrase.

Selina Almodovar 16:04

That's not a catch- Can you please just use the link and click below and we would be grateful in Jesus' name.

Kyle Almodovar 16:12

Amen. And so our mission was to get into a rhythm. Yes, where our kids didn't hate going to church. Yes, where our kids didn't dread Sunday morning, didn't want to knock it ready, didn't want to, oh, we gotta go again, we gotta go still. Yes, we didn't know. They could go and they could feel the Holy Spirit and they could receive and they could feel filled up like we do when we come out of church. And that season it rolled into just the perfect timing with the service schedule and with our kids' nap schedule because everybody was still napping. Yes. And the Lord really opened the door for us to gradually work back into church. And I wasn't craving leadership roles, right? I was craving my family to be connected to God, my family to be walking and serving and in a good place.

Selina Almodovar 17:01

And not only that, but we both agreed that we weren't going to step into a church just to get burned out all over again. Yeah.

Kyle Almodovar 17:10

Oh, we were we were really we were very intentional. Avoiding that cycle.

Selina Almodovar 17:15

We were very intentional on whatever ministry we step into, whatever leadership role we step into, it's going to be confirmed by God. It's not gonna be, oh, we need a few hands in the ministry. Can you help out here? And oh yeah, I'll help out for a couple of weeks and then it turns into a couple of years. You know, we're not gonna go in there, oh, because all my friends are in this ministry, therefore I'm gonna join it. It could be fun. No, we want to make sure that where we're going is driven by the plan and purpose of God for His what we're called to do. Yep. And it could be slow pace and it could be fast paced, but we've started joining ministries that A, our kids could also participate in as a family. Yep. And then B, things that we know God has called us to.

Kyle Almodovar 18:00

Amen. Well, let's get back towards sabbatical.

Selina Almodovar 18:02

Yeah.

Kyle Almodovar 18:03

When we're talking to couples, we have a few different seasons where we talk about what couples should look for and what they should should uh when they should look to take a downtime. Yes. What's the first one? We always hit on.

Selina Almodovar 18:17

We always tell couples when they get married, take a sabbatical.

Kyle Almodovar 18:22

Right after the newlywed season.

Selina Almodovar 18:23

As soon as you get married, as soon as you are done with that whole celebration, take a sabbatical, step down, step down from leadership roles. You don't have to like quit it altogether, but you're gonna take a season completely off. And by a season, we mean one to three months, more so three months than one month, because you're stepping into what should be your most important ministry of your life. And you need to focus and you need to celebrate it. Just like how we talked in the last series about enduring marriage marriage endurance. We have to celebrate being on the mountaintop. Right. We have to maintain and we have to embrace the present of where God put you. You have to get to know your spouse, you have to learn

Best Seasons For Couple Sabbaticals

Selina Almodovar 19:10

to love your spouse, you need to spend the most time with this new spouse becoming one. You guys are merging into one, you are cleaving into one, and that requires time. And if you're burdened with the attention of, oh, I gotta pour into so-and-so, oh, I gotta go meet so-and-so, oh, I got a meeting for so-and-so, oh, I got an obligation for so-and-so, then you're not gonna have enough time to truly pay attention and pour that energy into your spouse.

Kyle Almodovar 19:37

It hits on what what we talked about last series in that this is one where you know that this new season is coming. Yes, you know that you're starting in that valley of working uphill to be united, to be husband and wife. And there's only for some, there's only a short season before those kids start getting into the mix. Yeah. And all the cares that you have to put into a marriage start getting into the mix to where you can just enjoy that newlywed season. Yes. And so I I'm a big proponent of I'm a big proponent of doing ministry, but I'm also a big proponent of waiting and letting marriage be your first ministry. Yes. In that season, like hard. Yes. Hard, like I I wouldn't I didn't have anybody who I was mentoring when we first got married. I didn't have any ministries I was running, I didn't have any side things I was doing. Yeah, it was work and my wife who were the priorities and making our home a place of us.

Selina Almodovar 20:32

Yeah.

Kyle Almodovar 20:33

I mean, we're talking to traditional Christian couples who are not living together before marriage, yeah, who are not doing that kind of thing. So we had to completely merge our lives and get used to that transition. Absolutely. So that and it was beautiful. Those days, I look back on those with extreme fondness. Yeah. With just such good friendship building moments, even though there was intense times of fellowship.

Selina Almodovar 20:56

Right, right.

Kyle Almodovar 20:56

And lots of those. We we still had to work through it, but it was so worth it.

Selina Almodovar 21:01

We would not be where we're at today had it not been for that season to work through.

Kyle Almodovar 21:05

The friendship building that happens there is huge.

Selina Almodovar 21:07

Absolutely.

Kyle Almodovar 21:08

It's huge. And then secondly, I would go. Then your next step is what? We're gonna have a baby.

Selina Almodovar 21:12

Yeah, right.

Kyle Almodovar 21:13

You have that baby. I'm taking four to six weeks.

Selina Almodovar 21:16

A sabbat, yeah. Sabbatical. So this is the the second sabbatical we would recommend is when you have a new child in your life.

Kyle Almodovar 21:23

Two months. We're getting out of out of the typical routine where we're just gonna enjoy the new baby. Yes, we're gonna figure out how to be sleeping on four hours on and off.

Selina Almodovar 21:33

Yes. Can I go a step further here in this particular sabbatical? Sure. Okay, six weeks, right? I don't think six weeks is enough for the sabbatical. And that is the industry standard of what a maternity leave should be, but it's not enough. It's not enough time because by the time you're hitting six weeks, a woman's body is just recovering. It's just recovering. It doesn't mean that you are mentally and emotionally ready to tell. Take on leadership roles and to go back into ministry and to go back do do doing with all the other people in your life. You're still trying like postpartum is real. Yeah. And trying to figure your life out is real in that time. And trying to go back to your relationship and your marriage is real. And so six weeks is for you to recover, but then you need six more weeks to figure the rest of life out. And so again, I would say this is another three weeks, another three months sabbatical. If you can afford that, you know, if you can step down from your leadership roles beyond work and beyond your marriage and your new family member, you know, your family addition, then three months should be for you to really figure yourself out and to really ground yourself before you add anything else to your plate.

Kyle Almodovar 22:54

Three-month transition.

Selina Almodovar 22:56

Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 22:57

From no kids to a kid.

Selina Almodovar 22:59

Yeah. And I would even, you know, I would challenge you to say three to six months because again, if your postpartum, your identity shifts, your physical shifts, your mental state shifts. Trying to get your hormones balanced, shift. Trying to get your house in order shifts. Trying to make sure you have time for your husband and your wife shifts. Trying to make sure you guys are healthy again shifts.

Kyle Almodovar 23:25

It's all you're you're not wrong on any of those.

Selina Almodovar 23:27

In a perfect world, it would be six months. If you have a realistic world, at least three. Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 23:34

Yeah. Yeah. I'm really okay with that. I've seen it the fruit of that in couples who really take the time. And when they get back into the routine of it, they are able to know that they're on the same page.

Selina Almodovar 23:45

Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 23:46

Able to know that their their child is in a good spot, that their relationship is in a good spot.

Selina Almodovar 23:50

Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 23:50

And they walk forward in peace. Yeah. This is the whole point. The whole point is so that there's peace. The whole point is so that you're spiritually prepared and spiritually rooted in in the newness of it all. Right. Yeah. So we're talking about big seasonal transitions in your life. Yes. Where you need to take time to go slow and get spiritually rooted so that you can grow into that new season.

Selina Almodovar 24:13

Absolutely. What would be another good time for a couple to take a sabbatical?

Kyle Almodovar 24:19

You talked about it when you're grieving. Yeah. Um, as we get aging and we lose parents, yeah, and we lose people who are really close to us.

Selina Almodovar 24:27

Yeah.

Kyle Almodovar 24:28

Those were seasons where we're taking time to go slow really helped me.

Selina Almodovar 24:32

Yeah.

Kyle Almodovar 24:33

Because that is that is a lot. Yes. Right. And it is a whole new identity. It's just to me, it was just as equal of identity from becoming a father to becoming fatherless.

Selina Almodovar 24:44

Ah, wow. Yeah.

Kyle Almodovar 24:45

It was it was equal. Right. And I felt a whole different calling, a whole different purpose, a whole different mindset once that happened. And I I never expected that.

Selina Almodovar 24:56

Plus you have to go through the estate. You have to go through the transition of, you know, if if they have to move, if the the paperwork, you know, dealing with all of the people, the hospitals and the bills and the and the and the wills and you know, all of those things can really take a toll on you. And to have the to have the safe space to process that, I think would be exercising a lot of wisdom there.

Kyle Almodovar 25:22

Another another route I would think about taking a sabbatical is when you're transitioning. A lot of our generation, a lot of our people change roles at work a lot. I was gonna change.

Selina Almodovar 25:32

I was gonna say this, but I I didn't know. Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 25:34

Or change locations.

Selina Almodovar 25:35

Yeah. I was yes, yes.

Kyle Almodovar 25:37

So regional moves are are huge.

Selina Almodovar 25:39

Yes.

Kyle Almodovar 25:40

And so I would caution getting to the new, the new you, the new situation, you know, going from let's just whatever, for Cleveland to Chicago. Don't just go to Chicago and jump in and go, okay, let's time time to find a church.

Selina Almodovar 25:53

Okay, how can I get popped in?

Kyle Almodovar 25:56

Get there and get rooted and get into what your routine is. Figure out where you're growing, you know, what find your peace like, and then let the church come to you. The Lord will will open that door. Absolutely. You don't have to force that. You're a Christian, you are saved, you are walking the walk. The Lord will make sure that you get plugged into the church that you're supposed to be at.

Selina Almodovar 26:16

Absolutely.

Kyle Almodovar 26:17

Right? That is one where I would go slow. And I would say that's probably a shorter sabbatical. It's not a three-month right, maybe like a month. A month or six weeks to get in and just get your feet wet and get comfortable. Yes. Right. And so I would say that that's another one.

Selina Almodovar 26:31

One thing I would say, and this applies for anybody who is serving in any capacity. I think once a year they should at least have one month off of whatever they're leading. Once a year. And the reason why I say that is because if you're leading, it's just like the seven days a week. If you're leading seven days and you're not resting, then you're not getting filled. You're not getting rejuvenated. You know, think about, I think now it's becoming, I don't know, I don't want to say trendy, but I'm seeing it more often where in August, particularly in August, a lot of pastors are taking breaks. They're taking a month off, they're going off social media, they're unplugging. They have guests, they have a lot of guest pastors, you know, speaking. They have a lot of um, they have very low events happening. And that's because they're allowing themselves to rest for a season so that they can come back refreshed and renewed. And I think if if past if it's important enough for pastors to do it, it should be important enough for your leaders to do as well. It doesn't have to be in August, you know, but if if you know that you have a very busy holiday season, or if you know that your kids are involved in sports heavily in one particular month of the year, if you know that all of the birthdays of your family fall in this one season, you know, choosing to focus on that instead of being overwhelmed and being overburdened

Signs You Need To Sit Down

Selina Almodovar 28:00

is is good. You know?

Kyle Almodovar 28:02

Yeah. I'm gonna go through the the example of what we went through today. It's Mother's Day. Yeah. We're trying to take care of moms, right? Trying to take care of you, trying to take care of your mom. We went and spent some time over there, helped her out with with um some mulch and some things, but then we were driving home. Yeah. We went and got dinner, and we were driving home, and you looked at me and you said, Today didn't feel like a Sabbath. Definitely not. We knew we were coming here to record this, and the last few weeks, this the Sabbath episodes, we felt like we took Sabbath, yeah, church.

Selina Almodovar 28:34

We were resting.

Kyle Almodovar 28:34

We were we were rested.

Selina Almodovar 28:36

Yeah, we were connecting with God and resting.

Kyle Almodovar 28:38

But but today I and I looked over and I was like, I totally agree. Yeah. Like this didn't feel like a Sabbath, and now we're gonna go. I gotta go, you know, six days in a row, and um gonna need a Sabbath. Like next week, gonna just need to breathe, yeah, smell fresh air, yeah, and touch some grass, like the kids say nowadays.

Selina Almodovar 29:01

Oh, Gen Z talk of the colour.

Kyle Almodovar 29:03

Whatever you are.

Selina Almodovar 29:04

I knew you would I knew you would talk their language.

Kyle Almodovar 29:06

But yeah, man, I feel it when we don't. We feel it. And I think if if you say you can look at yourself and say, No, I don't need a Sabbath, or I've I took a Sabbath for a couple hours the other day and believed that, I think you're lying to yourself. I think you need to to slow it down and really test what the Sabbath feels like, what a full 24-hour Sabbath feels like. Yes, and and let it wash over you and feel that relief.

Selina Almodovar 29:32

And particularly for this episode, if you have been in a leadership position, if you've been leading small groups every season for every year for the past few years, and you have not stepped down, you probably need a sabbatical. If you went through grief and it flew by and you did not rest, if you did not sit down, if you did not sit with that and process that and allow yourself to really grieve and get support and get help and really sit down with that, you probably need a sabbatical. If you're in a marriage and you guys are two ships passing by each other because of kids, because of work, because of other families, because of events, because of holidays and graduations and summer breaks and all of the things, and you do not feel connected because your plates are both equally full. This might indicate that you both need to step down from some things and take a sabbatical. It doesn't mean that you're less of a leader, it means that you want to become a better leader because you want to choose to rest so that you can get refilled and come out of the gate swinging. Is that the phrase?

Kyle Almodovar 30:50

Uh you mix the couple there.

Selina Almodovar 30:52

What what was it supposed to be? Come out the box swinging, come out the corner swinging, come out of the corner swinging, that's good. Anyways, hit the ground running so that you can hit the ground running.

Kyle Almodovar 31:04

That's good.

Selina Almodovar 31:05

Any last things that we can say for our couples who need rest, who are tired, who feel like they don't know anymore. How can they get more? How can they learn more?

Kyle Almodovar 31:16

No, my land the plane was was definitely saying to just test it. Test it for a Sunday, test it for a Saturday, right? Test it for a Saturday when you don't have to go to church.

Selina Almodovar 31:26

Okay.

Kyle Almodovar 31:26

And test like, or whatever your church day is, pick a different day. Okay, where you don't have where you can schedule like nothing and reset and then let it be nothing, let it be absolutely nothing, and watch how the Lord speaks to you, restores your soul, and sets you up for for the great energy for the next day.

Selina Almodovar 31:46

I was gonna say that as well is taking a sabbatical doesn't mean you stop seeking the Lord. You know, one of the things that we get in the Jesus covenant, in the new covenant, as he died for our sins and he came back three days later, is that we can now find rest in him. So if you are taking time off, but you're not finding true rest in Christ, then you're gonna you're doing it wrong. You're not gonna feel it, you're not gonna experience it, you're not gonna be fulfilled in order to go back to work and in order to go back um in that mindset. So please always remember these Sabbaths, these sabbaticals, this rest. Yes, it's gonna be a physical break and a pause, but it's also gonna be spiritual actively, and you're gonna be seeking God's rest and he's gonna pour into you and he's gonna give you peace. And even despite whatever's happening around you, you're gonna be able to feel that rest because you're being still long enough to receive that rest. And so that's what we encourage

Rest In Christ Prayer And Closing

Selina Almodovar 32:50

you guys to do in these seasons and in these times.

Kyle Almodovar 32:52

We thank you for being in and listening to the Sabbath series. We pray that your relationship is blessed by this series. Selena, will you pray for the people today? Absolutely. Pray for us. Pray for the podcast.

Selina Almodovar 33:05

Lord, we just thank you that you have done so much for us through your character and through who you are. And we just rest in that. We rest in the truth of what you are and who you are to us. And we thank you, Lord, that you tore the veil so that we can have access to you at any time, whether we are overwhelmed, whether we are exhausted, whether we are just struggling, yes, when whether we are just holding on by a thread, may that thread be attached to your garment, Lord. And we pray for the couples who need rest, that you would help them, oh uh uh Holy Spirit, that you would nudge them to find rest, that they would take a Sabbath seriously, they would consider taking a sabbatical in the future seasons, that they would sit down and not be stagnant, but be still to receive your rest, Lord. We know that the best and ultimate rest comes from you, and we ask to receive it in our lives and in the marriages of the couples who are listening and watching today's episode. We give you glory for all of these things, God. In Jesus' name, amen.

Kyle Almodovar 34:14

Amen. Amen. We thank you for being here with us in the sabbatical series. Remember to like, share, subscribe if you're on YouTube, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, five-star reviews. Yes, mean the world to us. Thank you for blessing us, all those who have given reviews and comments, likes, and shares. I'm Kyle. She's Selena. It's been another great series. Hit the playbook, get the new uh the new play in the playbook for this month, the spectacular Sabbath setup. Yes, and we look forward to what God is gonna do in your life through Sabbath. Don't just walk by faith, don't just talk by faith. Love by faith.

Selina Almodovar 34:52

We will see you next week for our last episode of season three. Please join us. We'll see you there. Later, later, Gator. Later, Gator.

Kyle Almodovar 35:11

God is so good, man. Amen. I know it's funny. It's not funny. It's it's cool that we looked at each other and said it's not a Sabbath.

Selina Almodovar 35:21

Yeah.

Kyle Almodovar 35:22

But then I get done with this and I feel like we did it.

Selina Almodovar 35:27

We did it.

Kyle Almodovar 35:28

It feels like this is starting to appear like farm. This is starting to feel like part of my Sabbath. It's like this. It's a bit of a decompression. It's ministry. It feels no, it feels so good. Like, I feel so alive, like so spiritually. Praise the Lord. Like it used to happen when I would teach Sunday school with the kids. I'd be like, all those little kids bless me today, man. Amen. This is a coloring and having fun. Like, I feel like, man, this getting in here and talking to the people bless me today.

Selina Almodovar 36:04

So you're saying that there's gonna be a season four?

Kyle Almodovar 36:10

You're gonna have to talk to my agent. Your agent. Work on negotiations here.

Selina Almodovar 36:18

What's his name? Maguire.

Kyle Almodovar 36:20

What's his name? Yeah, Jerry.

Selina Almodovar 36:21

Jerry Maguire.

Kyle Almodovar 36:22

Yep, Maguire. That's right.

Selina Almodovar 36:24

Alright, get me out of here.

Kyle Almodovar 36:26

Show me the money.

Selina Almodovar 36:27

Show me the Mada. Get me out of here. Show me the Mara.