Tonka Talk Community and Connection
Welcome to Tonka Talk, the podcast that explores community and connection around Lake Minnetonka.
Nestled near the serene shores of Lake Minnetonka in the Twin Cities, our show is your guide to discovering the inspiring stories of individuals and groups who are crafting vibrant, meaningful community and connection in this picturesque setting.
From lakeside gatherings to community events, from stories of local heroes to heartwarming tales of collaboration, we dive into the ways people are coming together to create a strong sense of belonging.
Whether you're a longtime resident, a newcomer to the area, or simply interested in the power of community, Tonka Talk has something for you.
Do you know of someone creating community and connection in a unique or big way? Share it with us. We would love to hear from you.
Learn more and connect with us at https://www.tonkatalk.com
To connect with Natalie: Natalie@tonkatalk.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TonkaTalk
Tonka Talk Community and Connection
The Mall Shooting - Part 1 Scientology - Life After a Cult
Ever escape a cult? I did, and I'm ready to share my story. In this episode of Tonka Talk, I share how I broke free from the gripping clutches of Scientology, with my entire family by my side.
It's a journey filled with a myriad of emotions, where the final push came from a shooting at a Seattle mall. The following two years were challenging yet liberating, as the support from the Lake Minnetonka community became a beacon of hope in my life.
I found solace, understanding, and acceptance in writing for the Lakeshore Weekly, competing in the Mrs Minnesota International Pageant, and volunteering with the Excelsior Fire Department and the Red Cross. The journey may have been tough, but the community made it bearable.
But it doesn't stop there; community and connection continued to play a pivotal role in my life post-Scientology. A violent crime was the initiator to my involvement in Scientology, and ironically it was also the catalyst to my departure.
The power of community and connection that I discovered in Lake Minnetonka debunked the indoctrinated idea that only Scientologists could truly help people.
I encourage you to be a part of this enlightening conversation and join our TonkaTalk community. I'm eager to hear your stories of finding your own sense of belonging. Let's create a space where we don't just fit in but also thrive, grow, and learn. So, hit that subscribe button and don't hesitate to reach out to us on social media. We're all just puzzle pieces looking for where we fit in, right?
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Today I'm pulling back the curtain and sharing a little bit about how the Lake Minnetonka community helped me escape from a cult and find a real community. I'm Natalie Webster. Welcome to Tonka Talk, where we share the ways people create community and connection. Now, one podcast episode isn't enough to share the whole story, but if you want to hear the whole story, let me know and I'll do more episodes about it, because it has everything to do with my passion for sharing how people create community and connection today.
Speaker 1:I was raised in Scientology and after 35 years, I finally left with three generations of my family. If you aren't familiar with Scientology or why it's often referred to as a cult, do some Googling and you will figure it out and learn why leaving, especially with multiple generations of your family, like I did, is actually pretty rare. Though I had thought of leaving on and off for years, I can pinpoint the day I made the decision to leave. It was my final once and for all decision. I'm definitely going to leave, and it was November 22, 2008,. And it was while I was hiding in the back of a shoe store in a mall in Seattle during a shooting. When I first heard the gunshots, I grabbed my two goddaughters, who I was with. I was visiting them in Seattle and we ran. Well, I ran kind of dragging them. They didn't want to go at first they were. I don't think they understood what was going on. Right away we ran to the back of the store. I figured it was smarter than running out of the store, as some people did, which, in my mind, was going towards where the gunfire was coming from. At that level of fight or flight, I think your life really does flash before your eyes. At least it did for me. All I could think about was that I never had a chance to truly live a life that was my own choosing. The vast majority of my life was dedicated to the Church of Scientology. If I were to leave, I risked losing my friends, my entire family, who were mostly Scientologists. So we're sitting there, crouched down on the floor behind rows of shoes. I decided in that moment, once and for all, that I was going to leave, no matter the cost, and take control of my life. I knew it meant I was married at the time. It could have meant losing my husband, my mom, my other family members. Again, I had three generations of my family in Scientology. It actually took me two years to actually leave. This was because I wanted to leave with my family intact and that took quite a bit of work.
Speaker 1:At the same time I just started writing a monthly column for the Lakeshore Weekly called Outside the Box. That's a local community paper that was here around Lake Minnetonka. I would try things around the Lake Minnetonka area that pushed me outside of my comfort zone and then share the experience with readers. I actually wrote that column for a decade up until the Lakeshore Weekly shut down during the pandemic. Also, at this time you kind of get the idea there's a lot going on. I had just started writing this column I had just.
Speaker 1:At the same time I was Mrs Excelsior. I had competed in the Mrs Minnesota International Pageant. Between the pageant and writing for the paper I was exposed to so many people doing amazing things in the community. In Scientology we were indoctrinated to believe that no one but Scientologists or the Church of Scientology could truly help people. Yet through the volunteering I was doing as Mrs Excelsior and the people I met through the experiences that I wrote about for the Lakeshore Weekly, I was meeting many people who were truly helping others. That really helped to open my eyes to this one piece of indoctrination that I could see over and over again was not true. If this wasn't true, what else wasn't true? If you want to hear more about this, I can share in another episode what happened during those two years of what I call unbrainwashing myself and the lengths I had to go through to get my oldest daughter out. Let me know If you want to hear more about this. I'll do more episodes about it.
Speaker 1:From the day I decided once and for all to leave to the day I formally left was almost two years, take it easy. I became part of the Lake Minnetonka community. It was almost like a coming out for me. It was my formal announcement to the Church of Scientology that I was leaving. I just threw myself into this community of friends and business owners that I'd met through being Mrs Excelsior, through Riding for the Lakeshore. I made real friends outside of Scientology for the first time. I volunteered with other people the year before. I had volunteered with the Excelsior Fire Department and the Red Cross after the I-35 bridge collapse. That too was very eye-opening. I can talk more about that later.
Speaker 1:Over and over, I was seeing firsthand that my Scientology indoctrination, that only Scientology had the answers to help mankind was not true. I knew that leaving and being vocal meant I would likely experience a level of harassment. That did happen. I can share more about that later too, if you want to hear about that. There were actually quite a few funny experiences with that around town, even riding Excelsior, being followed by private investigators having photos taken. It was kind of crazy.
Speaker 1:After I formally left Scientology, I wasn't completely sure how my newfound community would receive me. I hadn't really talked about my past and things that had happened in Scientology up to that point, up until when I formally left, which was January 2010. Because I hadn't shared as much about it, I just wasn't sure how it would really be received. Riding my column became a way to process this new world that I was discovering. I continued volunteering around town, continued to make friends and continued to grow as I was totally embraced by this community that I lived in. Honestly, looking back, for all I know, they just thought I was completely crazy, and still do. That's totally fine, because it was crazy.
Speaker 1:What I experienced for most of my life was very unusual. What I came to learn is that everyone has their own struggles. You might even say their own cult. It could be a controlling family or abusive relationship, it could be addiction or an actual religious cult. What I came to understand was that accepting people where they are at, without judgment, led to deep friendships and true community. Because I was accepted for me while I was figuring out who I was without my Scientology indoctrination. I was able to do the same for other people Because I lived through so many bizarre experiences in Scientology.
Speaker 1:I had no judgment when it came to other people and their struggles or things they felt embarrassed about. I wasn't judging them because in my mind, what I experienced not to take away from what happened to them, but my experiences were so extreme that I and meeting and making these friends around town I'm like as they're learning about this because I would share things here and there that would come up and it was actually through sharing these experiences with my friends that I made around town that weren't Scientologists that I became to understand how bizarre and wrong these experiences were. I had no one to bounce them off of before. In Scientology, you're not allowed to talk about any criticism. You're not allowed to read or listen to any criticism about the church. So this was really the first time I was kind of able to openly speak about a lot of these things and, honestly, it took years before I realized just how much of my upbringing and what I lived through was wrong and wasn't really what community was. And if my friends could accept me for me, then how could I not do the same? It's like we're all puzzle pieces looking for a place where we fit in.
Speaker 1:When I would open up and share about some of my experiences in the cult, though my friends found it hard to believe sometimes, they didn't judge me but rather accepted me and they were genuinely curious, and I've often been asked do you mind talking about it? I don't mind talking about it. It's actually very healing for me to talk about it. I'm very open about it and I find that very helpful in my processing everything that happened in processing life afterwards. So if you ever have a question about it, reach out. I will be straight up and I'm completely willing to talk about it Now, because my friends made me feel safe to open up about it, I did.
Speaker 1:I even worked for MyTalk 107.1 for a while doing a Saturday show with Twila Dang it was Twila and Natalie and if the topic of Scientology came up, which it often did, because that was the time when Tom Cruise was jumping on Oprah's couch. I felt comfortable talking about it, despite the harassment that was going on behind the scenes and pretty much happened every time I talked about it at that time. Since then, I will say this since Leah Remini came out and did her show, scientology Aftermath, which I think it was about when her show first came out Any kind of harassment I was experiencing completely stopped. So I would like to shout out and thank Mike Rinder and Leah Remini for doing that show. It just is such an eye-opener for people to what really is going on behind the scenes with Scientology and the abuses that occur, and they're creating a safe space for a lot of people like me to be able to talk about it and process it and heal and create new communities and real relationships. Now it was because of this community, this Lake Minnetonka community, that embraced me that I stood up to Scientology.
Speaker 1:I fought to get my daughter, get my daughter out, and I'm here today talking about it and again I can share in another episode it could be a whole episode how I had to get her out. It involved sending her to Mexico. I mean burner phones. It was a whole thing In sharing the ways people create community and connection. It reinforces for me what it means to be in a community, what it means to watch out for each other and, if nothing else, just be kind. A big reason why even I work in real estate is because I wanna help people find and create a sense of home, belonging in community and a house is a house, but where you shop, where you eat, where you find entertainment and support, that's your community. Interestingly, it was a shooting that got me into Scientology as a child and it was a shooting that gave me the perspective and strength to leave as an adult, and maybe sometime I'll share the first story of what happened and how I actually got started as a child In Scientology because of a violent crime that happened.
Speaker 1:In the meantime, I invite you to join our TonkaTalk community, subscribe to the podcast, connect with us on social media and let's continue to share the ways people create community and connection. If you wanna hear more about how community helped me get out of a cult, let me know and I'll share more about it. This is really for me. This is my TonkaTalk story how community has helped me over the years. I'd also love to hear your own experiences in finding community and connection. So reach out. I would love to hear from you and find out if you want me to share more. For now, I'll talk to you later.
