How to choose the perfect place to train P 2

If we search the web we found tons of suggestion about how to find the perfect discipline for us. Yet, you will find almost nothing if you seek advice on choosing the perfect place to practice it. This is because the guiding factors in our choice are often logistical, and we fail to see their real meanign. Instead, the choice of where to train holds decisive value in our satisfaction with the practice, and the aspects to consider are numerous and often not intuitive.

Last week, I guided you through the maze of considerations before choosing the perfect place to train, starting with the example of choosing an Aikido dojo.

I will shared my story – how I chose my practice location.

Today, we will recap together, starting from my experience, all the little tips to keep in mind to avoid making this crucial choice wrong!

Comment on the episode post on Instagram to share your story: Did you applied those suggestions? Do you have your own ones to share? And send me a DM to suggest content for upcoming episodes and help grow this community https://www.instagram.com/ritsu_aikido/

And if you are in Rome, we look forward to training with you in the dojo! All the info here: https://kohakuaikidoroma.com/

For further information: 

DOJO: 道場, a Japanese term indicating the place where martial arts practice takes place, originally inherited from Chinese Buddhist tradition. It originally referred to the place where Buddha attained enlightenment and, by extension, places designated for religious practice in Buddhist temples. The term was later adopted in the military and bujutsu practice, influenced by Zen tradition during the Edo period, and is still widespread in the martial arts community. NOGAKU: 能楽 is one of the traditional styles of Japanese theater, composed of the Noh lyrical drama and the comedic kyogen. Traditionally, both types of theater are performed together, with kyogen interspersed between various Noh performances during the day. 

FUJIMOTO YOJI: Fujimoto Yoji Sensei, 8th dan, Deputy Educational Director of Aikikai in Italy. 

HAKAMA: 袴 It is a traditional Japanese garment that resembles a wide-legged pant-skirt or a pleated skirt. It is tied at the waist and is approximately ankle-length. Nowadays, the hakama is used for tradition in some martial arts descended from Bujutsu (a collection of ancient Samurai practices) such as Iaido, Kenjutsu, Kendo, Kyudo, Daito-ryu, and Aikido. Hakama used in martial arts are made of cotton, silk, polyester, or a blend of these three fibers. The hakama is also a ceremonial dress, and in this case, it is made of silk. In the case of Shinto ceremonies (the Japanese polytheistic and animistic religion), the priest wears a white hakama, male assistants wear light green hakama, and female assistants wear red-orange hakama. The folds of the hakama symbolize the virtues of Budo (the Japanese martial way).
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Transcript

I have a deep and long-standing love for Japan, coupled with a background as a coach and mediator. I've been practicing Aikido for 15 years, alongside other Japanese martial arts. The most significant discovery I've made through Aikido is its immediate applicability in everyday life. It's a total game changer! It allows me to see everything from a radically different perspective. The dojo, the place where the Way of martial arts is practiced, can be anywhere with Aikido, and it is a sacred space of sharing and growth. This is a digital dojo, and you are the energy that fuels it, making it real. 

Last week, I told you how I chose my first dojo, the practice location, and how this choice is crucial. But what are the aspects to consider and the tricks to keep in mind to avoid the wrong choice? Stay until the end of the episode, and I will reveal it all to you! Where had I left off? Ah yes, I finally went to meet the Sensei.

Now the interesting aspect is that when I met the teacher we had a small conversation in which he asked me why I wanted to practice Aikido and beyond the fact that the dojo was close to my house and had a very big timetable I was immediately won over by his style, his way of speaking, what he thought of martial arts and I immediately understood that it was a place where Aikido was considered a philosophy, therefore very close to what I value and it remained a place where I stayed for over ten years and it was also the only place where I could probably have practiced for such a long time.

So what can my experience in choosing a dojo teach me? Well, first of all, there are aspects that are crucial for us when we make a choice but also and above all that what we look for at the beginning very often is not what we really care. And what we care we are not very good at focusing on at first. We don't really ask ourselves, as I said at the beginning, what is the deep motivation that drives us but we stop at the more superficial motivations. I wanted a place to improve my back flexibility but the truth is that I was looking for a place with a philosophy to believe in, a philosophy that reflected me.

The back was an aspect that I gave weight to but which probably would have led me to a totally transitory choice while the fact of having found quite randomly, because I hadn't focused on it, a place that had a way of thinking very close to mine changed radically my life. 

So if we were to list the aspects to take into consideration when choosing a place to practice, well the first one, I'll tell you, is try to understand what you're really looking for. I would really opt for a coaching session if you have a coach to ask, but otherwise you can do self-coaching and take a piece of paper and write down all the reasons, even the silliest ones, linked to the choice you have made. Even if it were the stupidest choice in the world like: “I simply have to do a little of stretching”. It's okay to ask yourself if you really want to just stretch, ask yourself if at that moment in your life you are making that choice because there are other motivations behind it. There are phases in our life where we need to change almost naturally, in which we take a different direction, in which we say: “ah now I'm taking this step that has always been in my head but which I have never dare to take”.

Here ask yourself: “beyond the - I would like to do a little sport - what's behind that moment of your life, what are you looking for” and if you don't have a professional to ask, put it down on a piece of paper, write freely as if it were a story and when you reread it you will surely find many small keywords. For instance when I do this exercise I often find repeated words or a very interesting thing is that when I write although I want to express a concept I sometimes find it expressed with different verbs from those I had thought to write. It happens so much! Try it because it's really interesting and that's the keyverb, the one that comes from deep inside, from what we don't focus on, maybe I'll write: “I want to do sport to loosen up”, then I'll go and reread it, in reality I wrote: “I want to do sport to free myself”, loosen up and freeing yourself could have a similar meaning but they are two completely different concepts, maybe in my head I was thinking about stretching and freeing yourself tells me something about myself at that moment. 

Do this preliminary self-analysis and then obviously think about logistics, it's very important because it takes a lot of perseverance to practice a discipline with the commitments we have every day so it is essential that the place you choose has a compatible timetable with yours, better if there are several different training possibilities to choose from, especially if you are a very busy person and perhaps it is not close to your home but it is easily reachable like on the way back from work.

Also consider another fundamental aspect that we don't always think about: we have different biorhythms so there are people who love to train in the morning, people who love to train in the lunch break, people who love to train even very late in the evening. We can't always choose, but think about the moment in which you are most coherent with yourself, for example, I can't manage to train in the morning, asageiko, training at dawn I hate it, I really do it as training for my discipline but for me the ideal training is in the evening and for many people it's exactly the opposite. If you find a gym that lets you train very late in the evening at a time perfectly compatible with yours working hours maybe exactly in front of your house but you are people who have a biorhythm for which you want to train early in the morning, know that you will never go because you will leave work and you will be done and every time you will find an excuse not to go. If you know that you are people who train early in the morning it is better to try to negotiate to go at work half an hour later, of course if you can, or to find an early training time in the gym you have chosen. Better if necessary to sleep for an hour less but if you train well in the morning you have to go that time. Remember that, especially if you have chosen a discipline that is not just gym but is something more committed like martial arts.

Our first dojo, it is difficult to forget, we become attached to the discipline, the teachers and fellow teammates, to the place and it is often the only one to accompany the most beautiful memories even if you then have to change it, so it is essential that you get to know it and to get to know it you must be persevering in training so: you must have asked yourself what you want from that training and the environment you find must respond to what you are looking for, the timetable must be good for your biorhythm, with your commitments and the logistics must be accessible.

Another fundamental element: the teacher, especially if you choose a martial art, the teacher is a mentor, he is someone you must totally respect whose attitude and behavior must resonate perfectly within you. Don't be fooled by those who promise you heaven and earth, don't be fooled by a gym full of medals, don't be fooled from the teacher who says: “I will change your life”, look for someone who doesn't want to show you how many things he knows, he simply tells you: “I will teach you what I know”. Look for a place where the teacher is not interested in looking for students but takes care of the place where he is teaching, there are many people who easily manipulate a conversation with a newbie making him believe that he will find the world there. Well, look: the less they show you, the more gaunt the figure of the teacher you meet seems, more likely he is a serious person who will teach you well. Choose a teacher you like and remember that choosing a teacher is the most difficult thing ever because it will influence us a lot. 

Let's choose a dojo where few things are taught and where there is a serene and welcoming atmosphere.

A dojo with clear rules and that everyone respects. In our dojo, the place where we are training is judged by how the slippers are aligned at the entrance. For us it is a fundamental rule: if the kids enter the dojo and the slippers are not aligned perfectly it means that it is a sloppy place and the students are sloppy and so is the teacher. In our dojo paradoxically it is enough to look at how the slippers are aligned to be able to judge us; we do not display medals, this is enough for us to understand that we are serious people and we are looking for people who look at these details.

Look for a dojo to be well done rather than well filled, it doesn't matter that there are 300 students, it matters that there are 3 but incredibly motivated ones who come there happy to be there. Miyamoto Musashi reportedly had only one student in his entire life although he was the greatest samurai ever existed because in reality if a Sensei manages to have even just one student his life as a teacher was worth it. Don't be fooled by the numbers.

Look for a serious dojo but which doesn't take itself too seriously and be serious but not too serious is a point I’ll dedicate an episode specifically as I love it.

Look for a dojo where there are common goals but different paths for each one and different attentions for each one and if we talk about Aikido but it applies to any other discipline look for a dojo that practices a lot of Aikido but that talks little about Aikido.

Look for a dojo that does not stimulate competition between teammates but encourages support and complicity. 

Above all, look for a dojo that does not want to please everyone, it is enough that it pleases you. 

What do you think? Have you found it the ideal place to train? If this discipline is Aikido what is the dojo you have chosen and why? Comment the episode post on Instagram and don't forget to send me a DM with your ideas for the next episodes so we can develop the content together.

Thanks for being with me and I’ll see you next episode!