Breaking the Blocks
Hi!
Thanks for stopping by! Life is tough, and I think this podcast might offer you some relief. My aim? To inspire you to overcome some of your own blocks through the inspirational, honest, and at times, downright raw conversations with some wonderful guests, not huge celebrities, regular people like you and I. Let’s see how they have overcome the difficulties in their lives and offer you some advice and more importantly hope.
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www.craftymonkies.com
www.rachelpierman.com
Breaking the Blocks
A Life Stitched with Creativity: Nicholas Ball's Story
Why do some creatives break boundaries successfully while others struggle to find their spark? Join us as we sit down with the renowned improv quilter Nicholas Ball, also known for his stunning Instagram presence under @QuiltsfromtheAttic, who shares his unexpected journey from a disillusioned photographer to a celebrated textile artist. Nicholas recounts his transformation, painting a picture of a creative upbringing shaped by his grandmother and father, and how those early influences in knitting, embroidery, and woodworking steered him towards his current passion for quilting.
Discover how Nicholas navigated through family dynamics and found his artistic voice amidst contrasting interests with his sports-loving brother. We reminisce about the special bond he shared with his grandmother over sewing, gardening, and baking, which not only grounded his textile career but also inspired his first book. Nicholas offers a candid look at his creative evolution, discussing how a simple image of a leek led him to embrace improv quilting and how impactful events like the COVID-19 pandemic and the Black Lives Matter movement have influenced his work.
Nicholas doesn't shy away from sharing the unseen struggles of maintaining a creative career, from the emotional challenges of balancing personal and professional life to the pressures of perfectionism. Learn about his adventures in Paris, his shift from photography to quilting, and the importance of self-care and setting boundaries to avoid burnout. Tune in for a heartfelt conversation filled with insights into Nicholas's creative process, the making of his latest book, "Use an Ornament," and the life lessons he's gathered along the way.
To follow Nicholas head over to Instagram @quiltsfromtheattic
To buy the book you can find it here:
https://luckyspool.com/products/use-ornament-the-history-and-exploration-of-the-improv-quilt?_pos=1&_sid=8d5a06494&_ss=r
Also on Amazon UK and USA
Nicholas will also be signing copies on the Bernina stand at the Festival of Quilts 2024.
Hello and welcome to another episode of Breaking the Blocks. I'm your host, Rachel Pearman. So today I am interviewing quilter Nicholas Ball. You will know him from his Instagram feed as Quilts from the Attic Now, although if you follow his Instagram account, you will know his work very well, because he puts lots of beautiful pictures up there and he is a fantastically talented quilter but he doesn't really tell us a lot about himself. Now I know a little bit more about him, but I thought I would try and delve a little bit into the psyche of Nicholas Ball for you, lovely listener. So Nicholas today talked about his grandma, what kind of inspiration she was on his life, why he's terrified of driving, how he doesn't like his own impatience and maybe some other areas where he could improve his life. So sit back, relax and I hope you get to know a little bit more about the wonderfully talented improv quilter that is Nicholas Ball. Oh, lovely, Okay. Well, Nicholas Ball is joining me in the studio today. Hello, lovely Nicholas.
Speaker 2:Hello, lovely Rachel.
Speaker 1:Well, no one would know, Nicholas, that we've just had about an hour and a half of technical issues, but thank goodness we're friends and you don't hold it against me.
Speaker 2:No, I would never hold a grudge, Rachel.
Speaker 1:He says, crossing his fingers for those who are not watching on youtube. Oh well, it is lovely to have you here, nicholas. I've been asking you for so long and you were like no, I, I don't have any sad stories, I I I don't know what I'm gonna say and I said we just want to hear you on the podcast because I'm sure there's something lurking in there somewhere, nicholas, in the depths maybe. Yes, in the depths, um, but it is amazing to have you here because you are a very prolific quilter, certainly of the moment, although I can see it spreading out for many, many years. I can't wait to see you when you're like 86 and still at your sewing machine, nicholas, um, but no, you are.
Speaker 1:You are a brilliant, brilliant improv quilter. For anybody who's listening, if you haven't seen nicholas's work, you need to have a look, because it is bold, it is colorful, it is fun, um, and it's also very clever, and nicholas has been teaching with us here at crafting monkeys for some time. We've now developed friendship, and so here we are today, but there is one big block that I know that you, nicholas, have overcome, and that is you have just launched your book. Yes, use an Ornament, which seems to have taken about 26 years to come to fruition.
Speaker 2:Yes, I feel, as you said, 80, almost after having gone through that arduous task of releasing Use an Ornament. But yes, for a while we didn't mention the B word at all, but now we can.
Speaker 1:It's here, has been um what has felt like an eternity, yeah, yes, well, before we get to that book and and what that was like, um developing that book, and I know it has been difficult for you as well. So that would be interesting to hear. Let's talk about you, nicholas, and your beginnings, because I know a lot of you know crafty monkey people listen to this podcast. There'll be people as well who are just listening to it because they like hearing about people overcoming things. There will be people, I think, from Crafty Monkeys, who don't know very much about Nicholas Ball. You know one thing I will say about you, nicholas actually is you are quite a private person actually. You know there's a lot of quilters out there that put it all out there. Put it all out there, their personality really comes across in their social media. I feel for you, nicholas, it's all about the quilting. The quilting comes across, but I don't think we see much of the Nicholas underneath. So let's try and delve into him a little bit more today.
Speaker 2:Tell me about how you started with all of this creative stuff Creative, and creativity is a brilliant way to put it because it hasn't always been about quilting. So, just looking at the broader spectrum of creativity, that's been part of my life for as long as I can remember. So my earliest memories of creativity come from both my dad and my grandmother. My grandmother wasn't a quilter herself, but she definitely imbued in me that love of creating with my hands. So she would teach me how to knit. We would do counting, cross stitch kits together. We would do embroidery. We had a little book that we would work through and look at all the different embroidery stitches. So it was very much a sort of learning on the job in and around that time where she would look after me.
Speaker 2:Before school or after school. A lot of the time spent with my grandmother was spent in creative endeavour, and then also my father. His background was wood machining and carpentry. So again before school and after school, I would tag along to his workshop or to his place of work and I would be fascinated by all these bits of wood and the smell of sawdust and the idea of sticking wood glue on my hands and peeling it off and just making little oddments out of wood. So I've always had this desire, this deep-rooted desire to make things with my hands, and it wasn't until after I graduated from art school with my degree in photography that I sort of stumbled upon quilting.
Speaker 2:The short version of the story being I went travelling to try and get my photography career to take off and that never materialised.
Speaker 2:So I came back to the UK a little bit disillusioned, wanted something that was as far removed from photography as I could get really, and I happened upon quilting. I'd seen quilts on various TV shows and films and I'd always had this idea of wanting to make a patchwork quilt. So, without any idea about what I was doing, I bought cheap fabric, a very cheap sewing machine, very questionable quality thread, the bluntest scissors that you could ever imagine, and just set about exploring patchwork from a very traditional standpoint at that time, learned from books, blogs, other quilters working at that time, and just very much got bitten by the bug. And that idea of general creativity very soon narrowed the focus into all about quilting. So it's something that I wake up thinking about, I go to bed thinking about quilting and it has become such a major part of my life that now it's often difficult to separate the Nicholas Ball from the quilts, from the attic, because they're so intrinsically linked.
Speaker 1:Now, Do you have brothers and sisters, Nicholas? I've forgotten.
Speaker 2:Yes, I have one younger brother.
Speaker 1:So did your grandma work with both of you when she was doing all those lovely crafted things with you.
Speaker 2:Well, I think, to the best of her ability. She tried. I think for my mum and my dad and my grandparents and generally my wider family, it was very clear from an early age that my brother and I are very different. Whereas I was very academic, he didn't really like school, where I detested any sort of sport. He was very much enamoured with football and the rugby that my mum loves and my dad loves, so he kind of took that from them and similarly my grandmother she wasn't in any way sport orientated.
Speaker 2:So I think from an early age you could see that trying to teach my brother how to thread an eagle or sew a chain stitch on a lovely piece of white linen wasn't really going to appeal to him. So I think it wasn't that she didn't want to or that perhaps she didn't try initially. It's just that my brother and I are so different. It was quite clear from the off that that wasn't going to be something that would interest him. And similarly, in that same vein, as much as my mum and dad tried to engage me in their weekly weekend watching a football, or we would go watch my brother play football for his local team, and I was very much distracted on my Game Boy, perhaps, or reading a book whilst that football was going on. So we are very different, my brother and I, and I think we have our very clear interest that there is hardly any overlap really with those interests.
Speaker 1:You see what's interesting to me, the reason I asked you that Nicholas is because you see what's interesting to me, the reason I asked you that Nicholas, is because I was getting this feeling from you that you were an only child. I'm an only child. My grandma was very crafty with me. I could imagine you with your grandma being the only child and being kind of quite isolated in your world. And, yeah, I was picking that up from you. So then, obviously, that's why I asked you about your brothers and sisters. And it's really interesting, isn't it, that you've just talked about your brother and parents and that you were, in a way, quite I'm not saying isolated in terms of there was a bad relationship. I'm not saying that at all, but I'm saying obviously the interests were very different and there were.
Speaker 2:you know, your brother was very much like your parents, but you were this kind of black sheep in a way yeah, I would totally agree with that, you know, and, as you said, not in any sort of or with any negative connotation.
Speaker 2:You know, my brother did spend time with my grandmother and, you know, did things with her, and similarly I spent time with my mum and dad and doing other things.
Speaker 2:Of course, my dad had a bit of creativity in his sort of woodworking things, but there was that alone time that I really did cherish with my grandmother, when it did feel like I was, you know, the only grandchild, the only one there it was really myself, as far as I can remember that she showed how to make a Victoria sponge and how to make gravy and how to plant bulbs and how to weed the flower beds and how to sow seeds.
Speaker 2:So we would do all of these things and, looking back at that time like it was just her and I, of course, which which wasn't the case but there was that sense of you know, isolation is the wrong word but sort of a security, if you like. A sort of a security, if you like, a sort of a comfort in the knowing that she and I had this thing that somebody else, or my sibling or my cousins, didn't really share. So that was very precious and those memories of creativity from an early age all the way up to when she passed. You know we were still doing things together as I progressed into adulthood and those memories of that time are some of the happiest memories that I have.
Speaker 1:She did manage to see your first book, or knew that the first book was being made, didn't she?
Speaker 2:Yeah, so she passed away in January of 2019. And Inspiring Improv my first book was published in April, so she saw sort of a rough draft of it and, of course, that book then was dedicated to her and just to thank her really for the things that she instilled in me, the creativity that she shared with me, which I think at the time, probably I didn't realise how much of an impact it would actually have on me. I think certainly I wouldn't have gone into a textile-based career if it hadn't been for her or part of her influence on me at an early age. I have a lot to thank her for definitely.
Speaker 1:And she must have been so proud of you.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think so. I mean, she wasn't a very emotional woman, my grandmother. She kind of played her cards close to her chest. I don't think I ever saw her cry. She was very stoic. But I do feel that, you know, for all her grandchildren, not just me, whatever their endeavours were or their achievements or accomplishments, I think that she was proud of me.
Speaker 1:So that's, that's again that's a comfort to know. Now, that's interesting, you see, nicholas. You see, I told you I was going to delve into the nicholas you scratched that surface, haven't you that hard exterior? I've oh, I knew there was a softy in there. No, this is interesting, though, because I this is what I feel about you, this is what I said at the beginning, and I you know, I know you very well our whatsapp conversations that we both said if ever our phones got out there, people would be like what it?
Speaker 1:would be like watergate it would be like watergate. You do have two sides to your field. You have this persona and it you are, as I say, you. You don't bear your emotions out there. You don't talk about your personal feelings, or even quilters of today will often. I'm thinking about Chris English, when he puts his political statements out there and we know where he's coming from and he puts it all over his Instagram and he'll make you know, write things underneath the pieces. And then you've got Zach Foster who, of course, at the moment is talking about privilege, but you kind of leave it to the work. Really, you go nope, this is the work. Are you aware you're doing that? Is that a choice on your behalf? Or is it just something within you that you're not very as you were saying your grandma very stoic, not very emotional on the outside?
Speaker 2:I'm kind of a juxtaposition in the fact that I would consider myself emotional. I am an emotional person. I do sort of have an immediate reaction to things and I do, Do you Nicholas?
Speaker 2:I do feel things quite deeply. But then, and of course I you know, I appreciate the fact that people are vocalising their thoughts and feelings against all sorts of things injustices, political things, economical things, social things. As artists and as creatives, we have a platform that we can use to put those thoughts and feelings into pieces of work and pieces of art. That is something that I probably have yet to do, would I, you know? Am I saying that I would never do that? No, absolutely not. I mean, as I said, I do have thoughts and feelings about certain things, but I think when I'm working in, particularly in quilting, a lot of my inspiration comes from for want of a better word a sort of harmless place. So it's nature, it's flowers, it's insects, it's fruits, it's landscapes, and it's that challenge of translating that into fabric and then into quilting that sort of appeals to me. So I want my pieces that I make to be representative of that. So probably that's the reason why you don't see a lot of, you know, sort of hard hitting quints. I guess from me is that I'm so comfortable in that idea of just creating something nice for the want of another better word, that I at this moment in time, don't really feel the need to do that Now. I may, you know, if something terrible were to happen and that's what's interesting about use an ornament is that I explore all of these reasons why quilts are made.
Speaker 2:You know, the phrase use an ornament comes back to my grandmother. So as a child I would spend time in her house, as I told you. I would be so curious about all of the things that she collected. She wasn't a hoarder, but she had a lot of stuff. You know, like grandma's house, they have lots of stuff. And I was so curious and inquisitive and I would say you know what's this and what's that? And she would explain to me what it was. And there were some things I would question and she would reply that's neither use nor ornament, meaning that it's not pretty and it doesn't have a function really. And that phrase stuck with me for as long as I could remember.
Speaker 2:So when it came to writing this book, which, at its very heart, is about looking at quilts that are both functional providers of warmth you know, bedding, home furnishings but also that are used for political protests, to memorialise someone, to celebrate something, to say something, those pieces of textile art can become both use and ornament so it doesn't have to just fit into one bracket. And I feel that's kind of like me. At the moment I'm just working on these lovely quilts that are inspired by flora and fauna, but maybe five, five months down the line, something may happen to me in which I feel very strongly about, and I'll put all of that energy, all of that feeling and emotion into a piece. So quilts have this duality.
Speaker 1:They can definitely be both, I think by the way, I did wonder where the title had come from. Use an ornament. I was going to ask you where that had come from. But that's a great phrase. That's neither use nor ornament. I can just see your grandma saying that the sort of thing my grandma would say yeah, so that's lovely you just said there about. So I can't remember exactly what you said, but it was about not putting yourself into a bracket.
Speaker 1:Yeah, not putting yourself into a bracket at the moment, because I believe that's your sort of comfort zone, that's your. You're in your comfort zone. You love your nature, your fauna, you produce, work around that, or you're using bright colors. You, you know your comfort areas, so would it scare you to step outside that and do something? Completely not what people would expect from quilts from the attic from nicholas ball I don't think it would scare me.
Speaker 2:It would definitely be. You know, as you said, stepping out of that comfort zone, um, away from the familiarity of things that you've made previously, and I actually experienced this whilst writing Use an Ornament because it was written, you know, all those decades ago, as we said. So 2020 was when I started it and, of course, everybody now knows that 2020 was COVID. Nobody can separate that year from that. You know that event. There's another quilt which is about the Black Lives Matter movement, because at the time, george Floyd was killed. So all of that was brought to the fore. Of course, that's nothing new. You know, people have been protesting Black Lives Matter movement for some time, so I was very much inspired to sort of look into that and see, you know, how can I better myself, how can I improve? How can I use quilting as a way to show injustices in the world, show that things aren't always pretty going forward? I'm open to the idea of doing it more and more. I think it has to be something that resonates with me, something that you know I feel strongly about. So, yeah, I'm open to it. I'm looking forward actually to sort of it's always good to challenge yourself and move away from, as you said, outside of that box, outside of that bracket, and try things that are new to you, that challenge you, that scare you. You know, as creatives, we want to be challenged, and I think that's why I have such an affinity for improv quilting and sharing improv quilting with people is because it does challenge you.
Speaker 2:There's an improviser in everybody. You just have to sort of unlock that part of you that allows that creativity to escape and flourish. And whether that's, you know, taking a scrap and sewing it together, whether that's reading my book, whether that's listening to this podcast, whether that's going on a Crafty Monkeys workshop with a teacher that you've not yet heard of or experienced, that could just be all you need to unlock that part of you. And as was in my case. You know I started improv after beginning very traditionally and it was definitely a driving force and it put me on a completely different path.
Speaker 2:And I'm here now talking to you, and we have classes and I have books and I travel the world, and it's all because I thought right, I'm going to try and do a quilt that's not in this book or not on this blog post or there's no specific instructions for, and that's what improv did for me, and I think that's something that we could all learn from. You know, of course, we're talking about craft and creativity and quilting specifically, but that could be anything. It could be anything that pushes you out of that zone of comfort that you've become so familiar with, and just see where it takes you. It could be very, very exciting.
Speaker 1:I'm right on to saying that your first foray into your improv quilt journey was the Leak, wasn't it when you saw the magazine.
Speaker 2:Yes, rachel, yes.
Speaker 1:And I was just going to say, nicholas, when you were saying there about it could be any kind of creativity. So that could be someone opening up a cooking magazine, which is what you did a recipe magazine, and they could paint that leak, they could pick up their watercolours. So that's the thing it's finding that spark. So for you, let's talk about the leak, because. So for you, let's talk about the leak, because you opened up this magazine and you saw this leak.
Speaker 2:What was it that made you go? I'm going to make that into a quilt. That is the million dollar question and I wish you know. In hindsight you look back at your life and moments of moments of significance and you think how did it happen?
Speaker 2:This was just a non-descript day, weekday, and I was just flicking through a magazine on my lunch break and work and there was a recipe, as you said, for a leek tart and the first reason I stopped was because I love leeks and I love tarts and anything with pastry. So I was like I'm gonna make this. This is delicious and, being Welsh, anything with leeks. I know it's a bit of a stereotype, but I do actually like leeks. So I was reading through this recipe and of course there was a picture of the finished tart, all lovely and styled, and then there was a little sort of side shot of the ingredients that you need and the leeks were there and they'd been sliced through and of course in leaks you can see all those concentric layers. But I just thought that would look great in fabric. So I went home, just raided all of the greens that I had and you know, at that time my fabric stash was very minimal and just spent sort of a day and a half, really quite stressed, actually, rachel, I have to say making that leak block, because I had no instruction to follow. I didn't know what size to cut things, how to join them, so I just tried my hardest to replicate what I was seeing in the magazine in fabric. And I always tell people that it wasn't about creating a photorealistic version of the leak, it was just about taking that line, pattern, tone and suggesting that in fabric. And that really was the very first time that I thought, wow, I love this freedom, this creativity. So that leak really did just sort of blow the doors wide open and I became obsessed. You know, at that time I was running around getting vegetables, cutting them open and you've seen that what followed was the red cabbage and the tomato and the carrot, and then after that there was a second vegetable patch quilt which had like asparagus and pumpkin and red onion. So I was very much sort of inspired by an unusual source.
Speaker 2:You know, talk to anybody and you think, oh, what inspires you in quilting? I don't think a lot of people would say cabbages, you know, I think I am in the minority there, but it was just eye-opening for me and I really, really, really loved that freedom, that organic way of creating. It was so inspiring to be in that place. The sewing room was a mess. There was scraps everywhere, there was like rough sketches. The iron was on full blast, a steam was coming out of it and I was sweating and it was just amazing to be so immersed in that way of creating rather than going right.
Speaker 2:Okay, step four B, let's cut six rectangles. You know which is very it's great. You know you get good results from doing that and you know some people love the idea of following a traditional pattern, but for me, I found it quite soon after I began quilting, if I'm honest quite stifling. Yeah, it can come from anywhere, so just be open to it and look around and don't feel that you have to just only be inspired by traditionalism. You can be inspired by anything and just grasp it definitely.
Speaker 1:You know, you were just talking about being inspired by looking around. I mean, one thing I want to talk to you about, nicholas, is your travels, because you lived in Paris for a while, didn't you? Yes, yeah, how long were you actually in Paris for?
Speaker 2:So Paris came about after Barry and I graduated from university. Our two universities shared a student union, so that's sort of how we met. We both graduated and decided that we wanted to travel a little bit just before we came back and sort of you know, got a job and became adults and all of that sort of stuff. So I very much wanted to use it as an opportunity to pursue the photography career that I really envisaged for myself at that time. Of course, my degree was in photography, just graduated, had all these ideas of being a famous fashion photographer and I would shoot the cover of Vogue and Days magazine and all this stuff.
Speaker 2:But we ended up staying there for two and a half years, just in Paris, because it was such an amazing place and I just had great fun working in an Irish bar which on the face of it doesn't sound very glamorous, but it was a real melting pot of characters and of course, living in Paris you get distracted by, you know, things like wine and cheese and culture and museums. So the Nicholas that went to Paris, that was very focused on pursuing photography, was soon sort of lost in the sort of boho Nicholas of just wandering around Paris wanting to buy a secondhand typewriter and pretending I'm Hemingway or something. It was all very, you know, glamorous. So the photography, needless to say, didn't really take off.
Speaker 1:So what did your travels teach you then? Because obviously, when you went there, as you said, you had these ideas of becoming a photographer, and then those dreams, those ideas didn't happen. I mean, did you find that? Did you go through a sort of a low period when it didn't work out as a photographer, or did you just kind of go oh well, I'll move on?
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think, in the interest of complete honesty, I think the reason why the photography career didn't sort of materialise for me was because at the time I wasn't giving it 100%. I think I could have done a lot more, and I think I came back a little bit disillusioned, which is why I wanted to then pick up something that was so far removed from photography. So I think, to answer your question, I was just like, well, that's it then, and of course quilting was only supposed to be a stopgap. You know, it wasn't supposed to be this thing that I would be doing 10, 12 years later.
Speaker 1:I know you, I know our conversations, so I know there are things that get to you and I know that you know, as you say, you have a very sensitive side. But what does make you emotional, nicholas? But what does make you emotional Nicholas, what does kind of, is there anything that just, yeah, really can really get to you?
Speaker 2:I'm a very impatient person and I was actually teaching the other day and I just introduced the class. It just came out to me and I said I am very impatient and they kind of like, oh, and I immediately regretted saying that because I think they felt that I was impatient with them and I was saying you know, you better do what I say or you won't be able to keep up. So I quickly had to sort of redact that and go. I'm impatient, but not with my students, just with myself, and you know this from the classes that we do together. If there's a quick way that I can get people or show people how to sew six units in half the time, then I'll share that with them, because that is just how I work. I'm very frenetic, I like to be doing it quite quickly.
Speaker 1:Is there a flip side to Nicholas that we don't see or that you only show to the people closest to you? Because we see a very positive, happy, very hard-working person, nicholas, that we, that we all, as I say, we've all seen, we all know?
Speaker 2:on the most part, yes, I am. But I would say that there is a side that I don't show, and I that is. I'm at times not always, but at times a little bit like a swan on water. So, above the water it's all very, you know, poised and oh yeah, I can get that done for you. And yes, here's this, you know the deadline. But underneath there is sometimes an element of you know legs paddling like crazy.
Speaker 2:And I do have days where I'm definitely overwhelmed and you know, you and I have had conversations about this, about the burnout, the fact that it is very real, and I often sit there at night and my head is just doing somersaults. You know, my brain is on overdrive and I think have I taken on too much? But then I'll get up and I'll answer those emails and I'll send those images that people need for a class, or I'll send the footage, or I'll write the presentation or whatever it is. I'll make the quilt, whatever it needs to be. So I don't show that side of myself a lot. I try not to show the panic, but it would be remiss of me if I said that the panic wasn't there, because of course it's there. It is, you know it's it's a block. It's it's a block there that I have to overcome.
Speaker 2:Um, and I think how I do it is because a lot of the time, I'm very aware of the fact that I put myself in this situation. It's not like a day job, let's say, where you go to your office nine till five and you have these expectations from your boss, you have deadlines to meet. You might not want to do them, but you kind of have to because it's your job and you need to pay your mortgage. But at the same time, you didn't really put yourself in that situation, if that makes sense. Whereas with the quilting, I've said yes to the teaching, I said yes to writing the book, nobody's made me do these things.
Speaker 2:So, although I do have days where I sit down and go, you know what, I just can't be bothered with any of this. It's all just too much. I know that I've sort of made this for myself, so I have to work through it, and that's something that I think people don't see. Because, let's face it, who would want to present themselves as struggling or failing? You know, everybody puts on a mask and says, yeah, it's fine, absolutely fine. But I think, just being open about it and saying to people well, yes, I do have days where I don't want to do all of the things, or I do have days where I think I've taken on too much.
Speaker 2:It just takes the gloss off it, which I think is important, because in life, not everything is high gloss. It might look like it, and never before has that been more relevant than when we live in this social media-fueled world. And as amazing as social media is and as beneficial and useful as it is to me, and what I do and what you do and what a lot of our listeners will do, it's not reality. It's not. You know, it's not real.
Speaker 2:There are always sort of troubles troubles, I guess, behind behind the scenes, and I definitely have those. So there is another side to me. There is the side of me that panics and thinks, oh, I'm never going to get this done, although it might look like I'm very you know. Oh, I've written a book and now I'm going here to teach this and I've done this and you know, you'll see me on Festival of Quilts and it can seem all quite polished, but there is, there's, a lot of planning that goes into that and there is a lot of times where I think I'm not going to be able to do this.
Speaker 2:But you know, you just pull yourself up and do the best you can.
Speaker 2:You just have to just do the best you can and just be open about it.
Speaker 2:You know, have the conversations, let people know that you know you do go through these things, because it just might be those words that help them to then realize oh well, I thought I was a complete failure because I forgot to send that email or I was supposed to do this. And here is somebody that you know has a book and and does quilting online or teaches quilting online or does presentations, and yet they're having the same things that I have. So, and that there's a sort of broader element to it's not just quilting, it can be anything in your life. You know, if you feel that you are, so perhaps struggling, there are always going to be people who, on the face of it, don't appear to be struggling, who are. So just bear that in mind and and and realize that you're you're not alone. There are always sort of like-minded people who are going through the same things as you. So, yeah, that's that's, I'd say. The flip side of the nicholas ball coin is that I do sometimes go, ah, and I'm panicked about these things.
Speaker 1:Do you shut down then, in those moments when you're overwhelmed? I mean, I know you said there that you sort of take a step back and breathe, but I mean also as well, you were saying, other people tell you to do that Are you able to do that for yourself? You know you feel that overwhelm. What do you do?
Speaker 2:It's very difficult. I really find it's like I have an on off button so that I can turn off all of the got to send this email, got to do this, got to photograph this, got to sew this. It's like there's a switch that I can flick to turn that off, but most of the time it's like I just can't reach it Because people expect a lot of you, don't they?
Speaker 1:I mean, I have you know. I've been like deadlines and although I'm always very kind to you, nicholas, I am always like, don't worry about chill out, chill out till next week.
Speaker 1:But you know I, I, you know we've worked. I know you had a lot on at one point for me. You were like I have got 17 projects to do right now and then you've got other things. You, you work. How do you cope with those expectations then? Because, as you were just saying, it's difficult with that switch off. That's where the overwhelm comes. If you cave into those expectations too much, it's like other people come before you. Do you think there's a sense of that?
Speaker 2:Yeah, oh, absolutely yeah. There's definitely times where I give to other people more than I give to myself. Absolutely yeah, 100% agree with that, and I I think, as people, we do need to definitely try as hard as we can to take time. That is just for us. I think, as you said, we need to sometimes put ourselves first, before the demands of everything else, just that we stay sane, because it's so easy to get overwhelmed.
Speaker 2:You know, I think anxiety and the idea of being overwhelmed is nothing new. You know, if you talk to people from 300 years ago, they probably would have said they get overwhelmed by certain things in their life. It's just that those things have shifted. But also, as well, those things are so much at the fore now because of the way technology has changed, the fact that we have our phones and we have screens and we have constant streams of information and demands put on us, because people can just I need that, thanks, and they just send it to you, whereas before they might have had to send you a letter by a pigeon or something. Do you know what I mean? So it would have taken longer.
Speaker 2:You get what I'm saying, um, so yeah, I think just what it boils down to is you need to be front and center of your own life, I think so you have to learn to say no and you have to take the time for yourself so that you have the reserves to give to other people, because burnout is real, and if you don't look after number one, then you won't have the energies to give to number two, three, four, five, six. It has to start with you definitely.
Speaker 1:Well, you know, one of my proudest moments of you, nicholas, was when I saw your post on instagram. You made something and you wrote I have been so overwhelmed and overburdened.
Speaker 1:I am doing this for myself this is not yes, and you know, I was so proud of you in that moment because I know I'd been asking you for a lot and you were starting to say to me no, and I felt like you were shutting down and you and I always have a joke where I say, are we getting divorced? On the WhatsApp, but you know, I felt like you were withdrawing from me and I was like what's going on? And then I saw this post and you know, that's when I think maybe you could, which would help alleviate your overwhelm a little. Maybe do open up a little bit on occasion. Maybe we do see that more fragile side of things, maybe we do see that soft underbelly a bit more.
Speaker 1:And I was really pleased for you that you'd said I'm not doing anything today. I'm doing this for me today and it's for me, and I thought that was so important because I think that also helps other people as well. As you say, burnout is real. So by you saying I have been burnt out, so today, yeah, I'm sewing, but I'm doing it for me, I think that was a great post and a great thing to see from you. So perhaps it's just so, maybe you just need to learn to do. I'm not saying I'm not telling you what you need to learn. I'm saying you seem to be saying that you want to learn, to do more of that, to, to give to yourself a bit more yeah, I see so many things again.
Speaker 2:It's the, it's catch 22. You don't want to look at your phone. But then you look at your phone and see, oh, that's amazing. You see such inspiring work. And that was case in point, what you just mentioned.
Speaker 2:I, you know, I'm a huge geek, so I love all sort of sci-fi and sort of old retro comics and cartoons and all that stuff. And somebody had put a new FPP foundation paper piecing pattern up on this sort of fandom site that I'm a member of, of a gremlin from the film Gremlins. That was it, and my initial reaction was I would love to make that, but I just don't have the time. And I was. So it really did sort of strike a chord with me that I just really wanted that quilt and I wouldn't. You know, I'm not an FPP designer. I could never. My brain doesn't work in that way.
Speaker 2:I have dabbled in sort of sewing of FPP before, but when I saw that Gremlin quilt, I just wanted to make it for me and I thought you know what? No, I'm going to do it. So I went and downloaded the pattern and printed it out and I think a few days later I made a little chart of a fabric that I wanted to use. I ordered the fabric and it came and I was so excited to have this little thing that was just going to and there was no expectation.
Speaker 2:You know, I wasn't saying this will be done in a week. It might take a month, might take three years, who knows. But it was just going to be something that I could just chip away at in times of, you know, stress or when I just wanted that break. And you are right, maybe that is something that I need to do more of, because absolutely that wasn't the first thing that I saw and gone. I'd love to make that, but I don't have the time, and I think past me or previous me may have made excuses, but I think, going forward, I should definitely make the time. I should just grasp those opportunities and push everything else aside just for that hour. Two hour, immersive creativity that is just me.
Speaker 1:I think you need to do that, nicholas, and I certainly noticed a change in you after that, you know, you sort of came back to being you again and obviously that was because you were just feeling so overwhelmed. Yeah, you know, I've said to you I always see you as being super duper. You're one of the most professional people I've ever worked with, because you do you work to deadlines, you do things properly. It has to be proper. I mean, I remember with one of our first vip videos, you hadn't put the microphone on and I was like don't worry we could lose the sound.
Speaker 1:No, no, no, I'm gonna do it all again. And then the microphone now it takes were very funny, um, but you are an absolute perfectionist. So where does that come from? Where, where does that have it? Because you as I, I say, it's a step above. I have to do this right. Some people will go well, I've done my best, but you go no, I've done my best, but I think I can do better. Where does that come from?
Speaker 2:It's always been there. I remember being as a child in school. I remember being as a child in school. You have to do, you know, tasks, particularly creative things. So I have fond memories of you know you have to make models of something or you have to design a poster to advertise something, and there were times when you would be forced into group work. You know you have to work with a couple of your fellow students and I hated that because I then could not control the collaborative effort, because I could do my best and what I considered was my you know perfection, and then other people in my group might just. You know, as you say, that'll do, it'll have to do that. That's what I've done. So it was always difficult for me being in school working in a group setting. So I still have that sense of wanting it to be perfect.
Speaker 2:But when you work in an improv way, that perfection changes its meaning. For me it's not about having those perfect points and everything meeting, because a lot of the time you don't want that. You want to have this mismatch and this sort of um sort of spontaneous, organic looking piece. So that perfection now I liken it to knowing that I have done as much as I possibly can in that moment, on that piece, looking at it afterwards, day or two, a month or so, and I see things. Sure, I see things and I think, oh, I would have done that better.
Speaker 2:But in that moment, when I was making it, it was perfect for me at that time and I want to stress that this isn't from any sort of external pressure. You know people going, oh, that's not that good, you could have done better. It's all me. It's all me looking at it and going, oh, I wish I moved that triangle just up a little bit because it's too close to that triangle of a similar colour or something stupid like that. And it's always tiny things. It's never, you know, any big bold thing. It's always the little things that you sort of focus in on. But I don't think that idea of perfection and what it, what it means to me today, my creative practice, is ever, ever going to go away.
Speaker 1:I think it's always going to be there, definitely yeah, which in a way is good, isn't it because you do produce fantastic work?
Speaker 2:it keeps you to a standard, doesn't it? It keeps you wanting to, as we said, do better, do better. So having that, you know, that idea of wanting to do better and perfection in whatever way it means for you, I think is a positive. As I said, it's sort of like a curse and a blessing.
Speaker 1:And you like to be challenged, though, don't you, nicholas? I mean, I think there are some people who don't want that challenge, but I think actually that drives you on. I think you like a challenge because it's like when I came to you and said let's do the VIP club for a year, and you were like, oh, let me think about it. But I think, from your perspective, it was maybe one of the reasons apart from, of course, absolutely loving me, nicola. I think one of the reasons that you jumped in was because you thought but I think one of the reasons that you jumped in was because you thought, actually, this is going to be a great challenge. I haven't done this before. It is going to be a lot of work, but also I'm going to learn through the process. So I think that's what got you. That's why you did it. Was that challenge? Well, talking about challenging yourself, can we just talk about the b word now?
Speaker 2:we can. It's not a naughty or dirty word anymore, rachel, absolutely fine the book by the time this podcast goes out.
Speaker 1:It definitely is going to be available everywhere. So it has been a long process. Now you you've had your first book out already, so was this a more difficult book to produce than the first? Or was it that there were just outside issues beyond your control that meant that it took a lot longer than you had hoped for? What happened in the journey of this book? Because it did seem to take a very long time and I know at times you're very frustrated with it. So how was it making it? Writing it, compared to the first experience?
Speaker 2:Yes, it was very different. It was an experience which I had assured myself I would never have again. So, in hindsight, inspiring improv was a breeze compared to use an ornament, but only in hindsight, not at. The. Improv was a breeze compared to Use and Ornament, but only in hindsight, not at the time. So when I signed the contract for Inspiring Improv, I had six months to make 12 quilts. At the time it felt like an impossible task, of course, making the quilts, writing the book, sending the quilts for photography but it all seemed to happen very quickly for photography, um, but it all seemed to happen very quickly. Compare that to use an ornament, which has been sort of part of my life now since 2020.
Speaker 2:We're now, you know, 2024, so we're talking four years, whereas inspiring improv was, um, sort of a little bit about my process, about my way of working, a little bit about who I am as a quilter, and then here are some lovely techniques and here are some quilt examples for you to put those techniques into practice. Use an ornament. I call it sort of part history book, part craft book, because of course, there are new techniques for people to learn. This then involved research. It involved fact and looking at examples that weren't made by me, both historical examples and from people working in an improvised way today contemporaries of mine. So Joe Avery, russell Barrett, zach Foster, heidi Parks, the list goes on and on. So there was that element of this needs to be correct.
Speaker 2:What I'm saying here is not just my words. That was quite daunting for me having to sort of do all of that, but I sort of nailed down and did it and I likened it to the sort of that second album syndrome that you sometimes hear musicians talk about, because people had been so warm and sort of friendly and really congratulatory about Inspiring Improv. You know they would come up to me and say, oh, it really helped me out of a creative block. Even now I'm very much in a place of being both excited that that whole four year long journey is almost at an end but also slightly nervous because of the things that we've mentioned the fact that it is slightly different, the fact that there is a historical element to it.
Speaker 2:I am pleased with the end product. I am pleased that it is the end now and I can now sort of just release it, as it were, and it's out of my hands. Then If people don't like it, they don't like it. I can't change what I've written. I can't change the content. It is now forever, sort of as it is and hopefully, now that you've bought this book or you've taken a class with me, you're going to continue to add to this rich story.
Speaker 1:My only criticism of the book is I'm not in it. I mean, I was waiting for the second print run to hope that there would be an edition.
Speaker 2:Yeah, second print run Amend amend. Can we add this in? But, Rachel, you must realise that, as we said, 2020 was when the vast bulk of the text was done and you and I were just names to each other, not even names to each other. We didn't know of each other then.
Speaker 1:I'm sure I would have been in it. There's always the second edition. Well, yes, you know, or maybe you should write another book about, I don't know, um, just great friendship, and then you can put me in there.
Speaker 1:Here are my great friends rachel and nicholas the life and times oh, come on, I can see, I can see it, I can see it. What has been your biggest learning to date? Has anything happened to you where you've gone? Oh, I've really learned that lesson. Maybe it's just this burnout thing and you've you made that gremlin. Maybe that was a learning point.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean that definitely was a learning point and I would also say, obviously the making of the leak block was, you know, again a significant moment because of everything that came from it, but, I think, also just building on the skills as well. So the butterfly quilt, for example, that I designed for the VIP for this year and last year again, that pushed me. I was learning things about myself as a quilter that I didn't know I was capable of. Um, you know, of course, I worked in improv for quite a long time, but that butterfly quilt really did challenge me as a designer and as a as a teacher, putting it all together and creating content or creating instructions that people could follow.
Speaker 2:So that was a fine balance and I was you know will say I was very proud of that quilt and the fact that we put together such an interesting, in-depth body of work, which people, I think will and have you know, they've said it themselves taken a lot from. So I think those moments, you know, those light bulb moments, are definitely ones that will stick with me and have significance, I think.
Speaker 1:And on a final note then, nicholas, you know, I always ask at the end what is your motto for life? Do you have a motto, a phrase, some words?
Speaker 2:I think what it boils down to fundamentally is sort of just do you. I guess that's what I try to do. There isn't one right way to be anything and if you're inspired by things that are unusual or outside of the box or beyond what you thought you might be inspired by, absolutely just grasp it. Grasp it and run with it and see where it takes you. And the worst thing is that it takes you to a dead end, but guarantee you would have learned something along the way getting to that dead end and then you just turn around, you go back and you take another path. So I would say that's my motto Just be fearless and do you and just see where it takes you. Absolutely.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I think also, as a final note, I think you need to follow your motto and do you so when you're feeling that overwhelm, do you be you? Allow yourself, allow yourself to give yourself time.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely Words to live by, definitely.
Speaker 1:Yeah Well, I wish you much luck with the book. Now it's finally out. Thank you, and I'm looking forward to seeing it and finally saying to people yes, you can now buy the book. Now it's finally out. Thank you, and I'm looking forward to seeing it and finally saying to people yes, you can now buy it. Here's where it's available.
Speaker 2:I'll put all the details.
Speaker 1:Yes, but I'll put all the details of that below in the post, of course, so people can, if they listen to this podcast, go and buy it or have a look at it. Yeah, thank you so much for letting me delve a little bit deeper into Mr Nicholas Ball.
Speaker 2:You are very welcome. It's been an absolute pleasure. Thank you for having me.
Speaker 1:Yes, and I should say because she lived in Paris. Let's just test out the French here. Nicholas, Je suis enchanté d'avoir fait votre connaissance.
Speaker 2:Merci beaucoup, madame.
Speaker 1:Madame, not mademoiselle.
Speaker 2:Mademoiselle, is that the young one?
Speaker 1:You got it right, all right. Thank you, nicholas.
Speaker 2:Thank you, Rachel.
Speaker 1:Just before you go, lovely listener, can I ask you a favour If you have a friend who you think would enjoy listening to this podcast, would you mind please telling them about it?
Speaker 1:It helps me to spread the word and you never know, they might get a life lesson out of it or, at the very least, just have a lovely 40 minutes of relaxing time for themselves. The second thing to say is that, if you have enjoyed this, it would really help me if you would give me a little quick like or a comment, especially if you're listening on one of the podcast platforms. It just means that when anybody lands on the page, they can see that people have reviewed it. They've liked it, enjoyed it and got something out of it. So if you wouldn't mind leaving me a review, that would be amazing. And the final thing to say is that if you are a business and you're thinking how do I get my message out there, well, you could do it on this podcast. All you have to do is reach out to me, rachel at breakingtheblockscom. The details are below in the box. Thank you so much to everybody who's subscribing, listening, liking, leaving comments and just generally enjoying the podcast.
