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The Brain Based Parenting Christmas Special!!!!

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It's the Boys Ranch Christmas Special!!!

We swap carols, movies, and traditions while tracing why Christmas music unites people and how simple rituals build belonging for families and kids at Boys Ranch. Stories of Santa surprises, caroling nuns, and a candlelit Cantata bring humor, hope, and heart.

• favorite parts of the season, from lights to gifts
• when to start Christmas music and why it lifts mood
• why shared carols feel universal and participatory
• top three Christmas songs with personal reasons
• family traditions that create belonging and meaning
• tipping servers, gingerbread builds, and tree light sleepovers
• Christmas movie rankings and what they teach us
• It’s A Wonderful Life as a lens on purpose and worth
• Boys Ranch memories of Santa, gratitude, and joy
• Cantata, transformed dining hall, and caroling nuns




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Music:
"Shine" -Newsboys
CCS License No. 9402

SPEAKER_01:

Merry Christmas! Welcome to our very special Christmas episode. Today I'm joined by three wise women.

SPEAKER_05:

Suzanne Rott. I oversee the training department at Bois Grant.

SPEAKER_03:

Julie Ortega. I am a director, staff trainer. Tracy Griffin, house parent.

SPEAKER_01:

Alright. Today we're gonna do something a little different. We're gonna have a Christmas special. Like those old school Christmas specials that used to come on TV that were so much fun. To kick it off, we're going to celebrate Christmas by talking about some of our favorite things about the Christmas season. So, what are some of your favorite things about the Christmas season?

SPEAKER_04:

I love all the Christmas music. I love the lot. I just like the I'm a sinker for Christmas decorations and I love all the lights and the festivities.

SPEAKER_03:

I like buying presents that people are not expecting. Oh when I get the kids something and they're not expecting it, and just the look of surprise on their face, but they're so happy. Uh-huh. That's very thoughtful, Tracy. That sounds exactly like something you would do, right?

SPEAKER_01:

Yep. All right. So, Suzanne, you mentioned Christmas music. I love Christmas music. When when is it okay to start listening to Christmas music? I know this is a very hot button topic for a lot of people.

SPEAKER_05:

I say why, why ever stop, right? So at random times throughout the year, I am known to play some Christmas music.

SPEAKER_04:

I always listen to Christmas music, especially if you're having a bad day or going through a rough spot or just something you need to pick me up. Christmas music will always do it.

SPEAKER_03:

Sometimes I'll just burst into a Christmas song and then the boys will start singing with me.

SPEAKER_01:

My middle daughter, she is a very hard line on it. Because she says that that violates the sanctity of Thanksgiving when you try and invade Christmas music into Thanksgiving Thanksgiving time.

SPEAKER_05:

I do like the local radio station that plays only Christmas music during during the holidays. I'm a I'm a fan of it all the time. Not, you know, I don't listen to it year-round. I do like it to be special, but on occasion you do have to bust out a Christmas song or two.

SPEAKER_03:

If we're going to be thankful all year, shouldn't we celebrate Jesus all year? Amen. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

So what do you think it is about Christmas music that's so unifying? I was thinking about this the other day that just about everybody loves Christmas music. And most Christmas music's not new. It's not pop music, it's all timeless. So what is it about Christmas music that just makes it where everybody loves it?

SPEAKER_04:

I think it's because everybody knows the Christmas songs, the Christmas carols, the traditional songs. And you just if one person's singing, everybody's joining in. Everybody knows Christmas music.

SPEAKER_05:

We were all in Christmas plays in elementary school where we learned the same songs. And so now, regardless of our age or what part of a country we are from, we almost always know the same Christmas songs.

SPEAKER_01:

I think it's fun to rank things. We're gonna go around the room and rank our top three favorite Christmas songs, starting with number three. So who wants to share what their third favorite Christmas song is?

SPEAKER_05:

I think my third favorite Christmas song is Hark the Herald Angels Sing.

SPEAKER_04:

So I had a really hard time identifying just three songs. But one song that I really, really like, and it's not a common one, but it's May Every Day Be Christmas by Louis Armstrong. And so I grew up listening to Louis Armstrong and lots of jazz. And yeah, that's one of my favorites.

SPEAKER_03:

I would say my third is Silent Night.

SPEAKER_01:

My third one is Oh Holy Night, and it would probably be higher on this the list, but the range of the song is so vast that I cannot sing the high or the low parts. Like it's so beautiful, but it frustrates me that I can't sing it all the way through.

SPEAKER_05:

So you just sing every third word in the middle. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

But I think it's very beautiful. All right. Coming in at number two, what's our number two favorite Christmas song?

SPEAKER_04:

Silent Night is my number two. I really like all the songs that have been mentioned, and I can't come up with a number two, but I love anything by the classics, Dean Martin, Mel Tour May, Frank Sinatra. You can throw Leslie Odom Jr. in there now. So any anything by any of them would be my number two. So if you're just cheating, Julie. I have a number one.

SPEAKER_03:

Well, my number two is copying Josh and it's Oh Holy Night. Okay. But I like the Vince Gill version. His he's just so smooth.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, yeah. So my number two is Go Tell It on the Mountain. I think it's just such a fun jazzy song, and I just love all the different kinds of verses that are in it. And it's yeah, it's just really fun to sing.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay.

SPEAKER_01:

All right, coming in at number one. What's our top favorite Christmas song?

SPEAKER_05:

You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch. No surprise that. You could not have guessed that one, right? So many versions, so many people sing that song, and I I love them all.

SPEAKER_01:

Suzanne, how much Grinch paraphernalia do you have?

SPEAKER_05:

I have a lot of Grinch things. Probably uh most famously, I have a blow-up Grinch that also lights up that sits in the front seat of my car. And so the the day after Thanksgiving, Mr. Grinch becomes my traveling companion. And I do I do love the Grinch.

SPEAKER_04:

My number one is Little Drummer Boy.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh.

SPEAKER_04:

I love that song. I love the for King and Country version. And it speaks to my Enea Gram one heart as a good reminder. It's my favorite.

SPEAKER_03:

My number one would be away in a manger. Just those four words, you automatically get the picture.

SPEAKER_01:

So I'm gonna cheat on my number one. I'm gonna combine two songs. Mine's gonna be Silent Night and Joy to the World. At our church's Christmas Eve ceremony, the candlelight ceremony, we do Silent Night and then we transition into Joy to the World as we light our candles. So I just love how those two go together, and I have to add, I I'm gonna cheat. So I'm gonna do two for two for my number one.

SPEAKER_05:

Well, the precedent was set by Julie about cheating, so you're in good company.

SPEAKER_01:

Thanks, Julie.

SPEAKER_05:

Sure.

SPEAKER_01:

All right, so in my opinion, traditions for Christmas is what keeps family together and really make Christmas special. So I thought it'd be nice to hear some of your favorite Christmas traditions that you do with your family every year.

SPEAKER_05:

When my kids were younger, we always made gingerbread houses. And I have I was given a pampered chef mold so that you could actually bake the walls and the roof of the gingerbread house, and it just it smells so good, and it was always a lot of fun uh to put that up together and decorate it together.

SPEAKER_04:

We do gingerbread houses, but we don't bake our gingerbread, we make them from Pop Tarts. Oh, Pop Tarts. That works good too, right? Wow.

SPEAKER_03:

Then the icing's already on the roof. Yeah. That's right. Yeah. I'm not sure since my mom passed, it's hard to think about traditions anymore. So we all kind of do our own thing with our family instead of all coming together. But it's always been the big meals. I remember grandma's aluminum Christmas tree and then her snowflok Christmas tree with the colored light spinning on it. She always had a good Christmas for us. So I think we're overall, we all of me and my siblings have a good basis for Christmas tradition with our own families. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

One of my favorite ones is on Christmas Eve after we go to our candlelight service, we always go to the Chinese restaurant here in town, which is called China Star. We follow the star to go, you know.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

But we always go there afterwards, and then one of the things we girls and I do is we save a little bit of money every month, and then when we go there, we always try and leave a hundred dollar tip for the waiter or waitress, whoever's taking care of us on Christmas Eve, since they have to work that night.

SPEAKER_05:

Yeah. So is that still open?

SPEAKER_01:

No. We've had to unfortunately it's closed. We've had to jump to a different Chinese restaurant since then. But we we carried it on even though the star is gone.

SPEAKER_05:

Oh, okay, okay. There's not a kitschy saying that goes with your new Chinese spice, Josh. All right, work on that. Work on that. When my kids were little, it was always always a tradition that one night during December they could sleep on the fold-out couch in the living room in front of the tree with the lights on. That's fine. And they they always thought that was a lot of fun.

SPEAKER_01:

And when we were kids, we'd go to my aunt's house for Christmas Eve and we'd always have chili for Christmas Eve. A chili cook-off for Christmas. I don't know what chili has to do with Christmas, but we always had chili.

SPEAKER_05:

Was this in Wyoming?

SPEAKER_01:

No, Nebraska.

SPEAKER_05:

Okay, Nebraska. Go Nebraska.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay. Well, it's chili at Christmas time.

SPEAKER_05:

Oh, that's gotta be it, Tracy. That's gotta be it.

SPEAKER_01:

All right, now let's talk about Christmas movies. I love having family movie nights with throughout the year with my kids, but I think there's something special about watching Christmas movies every year with your families. What do you think about that?

SPEAKER_05:

I think it's a great, a great tradition. I have a a friend who is posting every Christmas movie that he and his family have watched during the month of December, and it's quite impressive. And and there are no children in this in this household. And so it's very I'm very impressed with his dedication and his commitment to watching Christmas movies.

SPEAKER_04:

I love Christmas movies. I mean funny ones, sappy ones, just I'll watch them all year long. I don't wait for Christmas.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, there you go. I I don't watch the cartoon ones like I did when growing up because you didn't have a choice. Yeah, that was all there was. But I do like new Christmas movies. And and now my husband the other day asked if we could watch a Christmas movie. What? I know. I think he was not feeling well, but he stayed awake for the whole movie. Wow.

SPEAKER_01:

All right. Now we're gonna rank our top favorite three Christmas movies. So let's start with number three. What's your third favorite Christmas movie?

SPEAKER_05:

I really like the old claymation Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer movie. And I recently read some history online about that movie and it it made me like it a little bit more.

SPEAKER_01:

That's my mom's favorite as well.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, I love that. I I will I like when they're on TV. We also have them on VHS. But I love when they play them on TV. It's always a good night to watch them. My third favorite, I think, is elf. We like to watch elf.

SPEAKER_01:

It's so silly.

SPEAKER_04:

It is silly. It's so silly, but it's a great story about belonging.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah. Yeah. I think our new favorite is Christmas Chronicles with Kurt Russell and Goldie Hahn is in there. And the boys like it. I I really like it because there's some rock and roll and there's some crime in there, and there's, you know, then we all come together. Rock and roll, crime and togetherness.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes. Christmas traditions. Is it good?

SPEAKER_05:

Yes. Okay.

SPEAKER_01:

I'll have to check it out.

SPEAKER_05:

You you have a uh an assignment over the holidays, Josh.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, I haven't seen it either.

SPEAKER_03:

I need to review people.

SPEAKER_01:

All right, we'll get back to you on that. My third favorite is a Muppet Christmas Carol. I love I love all the Christmas Carol movies. I think they're just there's something about the that story that's fun, but I just love the Muppets and how absurd, but at the same time sincere they are. I don't know. And I think it takes the source material the most seriously, and it's just such a sweet, sweet movie. I I I really love No Muppets in general, so Muppet Christmas Carol is my number three.

SPEAKER_04:

Okay. That is my son's favorite.

SPEAKER_01:

It's so good. I watched it last night. All right. We're into number two. What is your second favorite Christmas movie?

SPEAKER_05:

I'm gonna go with the Claymation Frosty the Snowman. I like I like the oldies.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, they're great. My number two is Miracle on 34th Street. Oh, I like that too. And again, I grew up that was my dad's favorite Christmas movie. And so every year, watch the old black and white one like we would watch with my dad.

SPEAKER_03:

I actually watched that movie last night and it is my number two. Miracle on 34th Street.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah. Okay. It's just sweet and makes you believe in Santa Claus. Yes. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

My number two is Home Alone. And I think Home Alone one and two are equal. I I can't separate them. I love them both. Uh I remember when I was a little kid when they came out, I laughed till I cried. And even the better part was when my kids and my nieces and nephews watched it. I remember for the first time just watching them just laugh hysterically and almost to the point of crying. It's just I just love that memory of watching them, them watch that movie. All right, now we're to number one. What is the number one all-time best Christmas movie?

SPEAKER_05:

All right. I'm gonna I'm gonna let the three of you guess about what my favorite Christmas movie is.

SPEAKER_02:

One guess.

SPEAKER_05:

Jim Carrey's Grinch. No, that's the only that's the only Grinch movie I don't care for. Um so the Grinch is indeed my favorite, uh, and I love the original, but I also really like the 2018 Grinch that came out because they tell you why he's Grinchy. And so I think that as Julie mentioned earlier, it's also a story of belonging. And so I'm gonna go with the Grinch.

SPEAKER_04:

Mine is it's a wonderful life. I love that movie, and nobody else in my family does. And so I have a late night by myself with the Christmas tree lights on and my favorite snack, and watch that movie and cry every time I watch it. And it's wonderful. What's the snack that goes with that movie? Usually popcorn.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay, okay. Well, Julie and I are old souls, so uh mine is also it's a wonderful life. You just you just have to love being alive and it just revitalizes your feeling for your life. Yeah when you watch that.

SPEAKER_04:

And it's also about like you think your life is unimportant, like it's a life that doesn't matter to other people when actually it does. Like it you don't have to be big and grand and rich and wealthy and you know, all the things. You just be you.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, I'm gonna make it three in a row. It's a wonderful life, is also my favorite movie. Yeah, and it's funny, it wasn't until last year. When I was a little kid, I hated the movie. I thought it was terrible. I hated watching black and white movies. I thought it was stupid, boring. I didn't get it like why my parents and everyone else loved it. And I don't think I've watched it in like 30, 40 years. And then I watched it last year. April wanted to watch it, and so I'm like, fine, whatever, we'll watch it. And then all the things you guys said, and I balled like a baby through that movie. And I think it's because now being a dad and just importance of you know what did dads do and things like that. I don't know. I just it was it's amazing I'm gonna cry right now. It's so go watch It's a Wonderful Life if you haven't in a while. It it's it's wonderful. Anyone have any honorable mentions of Christmas movies maybe that didn't quite make the list but you just love to watch?

SPEAKER_03:

I'm gonna say best Christmas ever, which I've recently watched again. And it's just a sweet story about love and loss and then finding old friends.

SPEAKER_01:

Christmas story, you know, that was my number three. You tell it's wonderful life knocked it out. Uh I just think it's funny and nostalgic and silly.

SPEAKER_04:

We always watch Christmas with the cranks.

SPEAKER_01:

Let's wrap it up by sharing maybe some of your favorite Christmas memories with either your own family or your boys ranch families.

SPEAKER_05:

One of my favorite boys ranch memories is from my very first Christmas here. And on our campus, every home has a Christmas party on the same evening. And Santa comes to every every home. And house parents have set aside a gift for Santa to put in his big red bag and and carry that in. And this evening we had a visitor with a child, and so we had an extra gift. We put that that child's name on it and threw it in the bag. But in this home, it was a home of high school boys, and one of the the boys was really, really feeling himself. He was feeling pretty, pretty tough. And he had he'd gotten in a fight and won that fight with a kid who was older than him, and so he thought he was pretty tough. But when Santa came in, that toughness melted away. And especially when Santa had a gift for a kid who was a visitor. And this this boy couldn't quite figure out how did Santa know to bring a gift for a visitor. And it you could see that childlike wonder. How did he do that? You know, and so it was really great to see the true inner kid who just was able to wonder at the magic of Santa. And that's always been one of my favorite memories here on our campus.

SPEAKER_04:

I have so many favorite memories at Boys Ranch, mostly about the Christmas parties. But I think my very most favorite was the very last Christmas party I had as a house parent. I spent a lot of time picking each individual boy in my home a meaningful gift, and then wrote to them why I picked that gift and the things that I thought were special about them. It our party lasted really long that night, but it was it was just so meaningful and so good to spend that time with them, even though it was my last Christmas with them.

SPEAKER_03:

I think more than just receiving the gift, I think the kids begin to see how much love is poured into them every single day, even when you're having to have serious talks or hard conversations with them. But at Christmas, when you hand them a gift and you say, This is from me and Mr. Griffin, and they open it. Oh, I really love this. Thank you so much. And the one tough kid we have, he was like, Santa won't bring me nothing. I said, Well, if you don't, if you don't believe, he might not. So, but every gift they got, they were so grateful and so happy. And I take this chance to like restock hygiene stuff for them, and they got an electric toothbrush, and one boy's like, I really need this. I'm so glad you you got this for me. One little boy, he's pretty new, he opened the stuffed animal, and he just stared at it in disbelief that that was truly for him. We do every year now, we do a list of something you want, something you need, something to wear, something to read. And then I get the choice, the chance, the opportunity to pick out and fill in for the rest of their list. Things that I know and suspect that they'll like that they didn't even know they wanted. And I haven't missed it yet. And they'll tell you this was the greatest Christmas.

SPEAKER_01:

Mine's similar to yours, Suzanne. One time we were bringing Santa around to the to the different homes, and we had a home of pre-adolescent boys, and one of them was just five years old. And we're just walking up with Santa up the front steps of the home, and this kid was vibrating like you would not believe. He was so he could not believe Santa was coming to the home and just the pure screams of joy that he had. And it was so infectious, it wasn't just him, it was all the house parents, the caseworkers, everyone who was at the house was like vibrating with joy because of his vibrations of joy, and it was just such a fun, fun, merry night.

SPEAKER_05:

We have so many special Christmas traditions out here on our campus, and one of those is a program called Centata that we hold hold every year. It takes place in the chapel, and it is a combination of both staff members and residents who want to participate in that, and every year tells the story of Jesus' birth. And it always centers our campus on the true meaning of the season, and it's just always joyful. And after that, we go to the dining hall, which has been transformed, doesn't look like our typical dining hall, and and the staff there serve the most amazing food. It's really, it's really a treat and it's just a great time. A lot of our alumni come back for Cantata. Sometimes families come out and other visitors, and it's just a special, it's a special time every year. We welcome visitors. So if you are interested in Cantata for next year, be sure and contact our campus and we'll let you know when that is scheduled. But it's it's always wonderful and it's such a a joyful memory.

SPEAKER_01:

I'm still full and it was two weeks ago. So good. You're so right.

SPEAKER_05:

One of the other memories that I really appreciate is the fact that we have a Catholic convent located seven miles north of our campus called Prair Town. And the nuns are frequently on our campus. They come and get their mail here. Sometimes they come for ice cream, they participate in a lot of the activities we have on campus. But for the home parties, they come to campus and they divide into quartets and They go caroling at each of the homes, which is just such a wonderful thing. I was at a home party several years ago, and the four nuns came in. And as they started to carol, one of the nuns beatboxed right into silent night, and the kids lost their minds. I don't know how many of you listeners have ever heard a nun beatbox, but I have. And some of my coworkers here are shaking their heads that they have also heard that. But it's pretty special and it's just a Christmas memory. I think that I will never forget. And the kids who've heard that will never forget the nun who beatboxed.

SPEAKER_03:

She was actually at our house, and one of the boys said, I am scared of those ladies. I I can't do this. So he stood with his back to them. But when she started her part, he turned around and he started getting with the dancing. And he went up to her afterwards and spoke to her and said, Thank you for rapping. That was so neat. So cool. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

It is cool. We one year back when hacky sacks were the big thing, all the boys wanted hacky sacks. I put a hacky sack in all of their stockings, and the nuns came in and they were opening their stockings, and the nuns hacky sacked with the boys. And that was so much fun. So much fun. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, we here at Brain-Based Parenting and Cal Farley's Boys Ranch want to wish you and your family a very Merry Christmas and pray that your family will have a very happy new year. So until next time, you might have to loan out your Cortex Day. Just make sure you remember and get the back.

SPEAKER_00:

Thank you for listening to Brain Based Parenting. We hope you enjoyed this show. If you would like more information about Cal Farley's Boys Ranch, are interested in employment, would like information about placing your child, or would like to help us help children by donating to our mission, please visit calfarley.org. You can find us on all social media platforms by searching for CalFarley's. Thank you for spending your time with us and have a blessed day.

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Joshua Sprock

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Suzanne Wright

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