Mature Mischief podcast
Greetings, Gremlyns!
Join us on the Mature Mischief podcast with your Host Jesse James and Co-Host Dee Dee.
Embark on a journey filled with mishaps, awkward moments, and adulting wins. Prepare to laugh, cringe, and nod along with every episode!
Ready to embrace the chaos of adulting and find solace in shared experiences? Let the Mature Mischief Podcast guide you through the ups and downs of life.
Don't miss out on the genuine hilarity that comes with being a grown-up. We'll show you how to turn mundane moments into comedic gold!
Mature Mischief Podcast: Because growing up may be tough, but finding humor in it is always a joy! Tune in now!
Mature Mischief podcast
Mischief, Musings, and Managing Mayhem
Ever wonder how a night filled with puppy chaos and whispered midnight musings could transform into a journey of resilience and laughter? We invite you to join us in our impromptu late-night recording session, where the unpredictability of a new puppy and the stillness of a sleeping household set the stage for a heart-to-heart exploration of life's constant ups and downs. We'll share personal stories about job struggles, the strange series of events that have followed us since moving to San Antonio, and the emotional rollercoaster of losing a beloved pet. Each mishap and giggle serves as a reminder that life, with all its challenges, is an ongoing test requiring a hefty dose of humor and unwavering resilience.
As life continues to throw its unpredictable challenges our way, we dive into the mental gymnastics required to stay positive amidst chaos. Discussing strategies like setting boundaries with the universe and embracing positivity, we explore how the law of attraction isn't just magic but a mindset that demands effort. Our chat also delves into the emotional conflict of seeing good folks struggle while others seem to sail through life effortlessly. Through candid reflections, we talk about the need to remain optimistic and seek practical solutions, even when life's game feels rigged against us.
On a lighter note, we tackle the absurdities of online spam and scams, sharing the hilarity of unsolicited messages and bizarre propositions. From managing phone contacts with a touch of humor to reflecting on family experiences and the value of simplicity, our conversation takes a whimsical turn. We wrap up with our musings on astrology, the introduction of Jesse's playful new pup Mushu, and a playful list of minor, mischievous wishes for those who've wronged us. Join us as we embrace life’s unpredictability, reaffirm our identities, and find comfort in the humor that keeps us going.
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Breather break
what's up, gremlins? Welcome back to another podcast. My name is jesse james. I hope everyone is doing it and doing it well. You know the drill. This is the mature mischief podcast. We are taking a different direction for the podcast. It's not a permanent thing, trust me, but we are way late in the night. It is 3.17 in the morning, deedee. What the fuck are we doing?
Speaker 2:Being the night owls that we are oh.
Speaker 1:God, because you know why we didn't record anything for Wednesday. So if you heard a shenanigan podcast for Wednesday, it's because we forgot to post it on Saturday. Well, not technically, because it was already up.
Speaker 2:I just forgot to hit post Smooth move Cliff. No gold star for you, I know Sorry.
Speaker 1:So we're kind of whispering because everyone's asleep in here today and we're not trying to make the dogs bark or anything like that. You may hear them if they decide to, so we do apologize in advance on there, but you know what it is. It is Saturday and it's oh my God, that is so soft spoken. I want to have fun with you and your best friend too. No, sir.
Speaker 2:No, sir, no sir. You know how hard this is going to be.
Speaker 1:I want to have fun with your friend too. Welcome. I just want to do that voice all day.
Speaker 2:No, we already did that once it was a different voice, but we already did that once. It was a different voice, but we did that once, oh come on that was hilarious yesterday.
Speaker 1:I know it, you know it, the whole world likes knows it. I like saying my name twice. I am your host, jesse james and I am your co-host dd, dd, what it is, sister D. Oh my god, I almost sound like Noseratu. Come here and bring me what you need.
Speaker 2:Get down on your knees and show me your rod the one that cracks me up every single time is the one that says bounce on it crazy, bounce on it Crazy style.
Speaker 1:Bounce on it. Oh my God. Bounce on it crazy style Keep going until my juices flow into you. That shit was hilarious. It's hilarious.
Speaker 2:Oh shit.
Speaker 1:So if you hear me like yelling little shits because I have a new puppy, I have a new dog shit. So if you hear me like yelling little shits because I have a new puppy, I have a new dog guys, and he's biting the shit out of Jesse's foot. He is biting my fucking shit. Oh my God, dude, you're fucking canines, so I'm Puppy. Teeth are sharp, dude.
Speaker 2:We should have brought his little toy.
Speaker 1:It's somewhere in here, damn it.
Speaker 2:You're going to hear a lot of owls today, because this little fucker knows how to bite something that he can chew on yeah, he'd be fine, he'd be all right it's okay, but uh, yeah.
Speaker 1:So it's gonna be a fun day, dd. You mean a fun morning. It is gonna be a fun day, didi you mean a fun morning. It is going to be a fun morning, but anywho, shit. What do you have planned going on? Didi, you have a lot of stuff. Life keeps dragging you through the mud, thank God.
Speaker 2:Nobody's business, dude. It's not one thing, it's another no shit. Back to back to back. I'm like can I catch a breath?
Speaker 1:Can I stand on my own two feet real quick, and you know what? I'm not gonna lie to you. What you went through is what we went through when we first moved up here to san antonio. I don't know what it is about moving up here so I've been initiated yeah, literally, because when we moved to san antonio, um ryan had a job. He got fired from like four different jobs. Uh, being up here and uh it. It was just fucking insane. I was like what the?
Speaker 2:fuck and uh, yeah, it was pretty much insane, like yeah, but I know we had talked about my dog passing away prior to that. My just the hours of my job tanked and of course, my other one.
Speaker 2:It's just not peak season yeah it's not going to come till around, maybe april, um, so that's. But, so that's a given. But this year I'm just kind of like, yeah, but there's a whole change and shift with work, so that's probably why. But after that happens, that's when my dog passes away. And then after my dog passed away, my storage got broken into and they took some things I don't even know. Say hello, oh, how cute, he's going to buy it, he's going gonna take a huge chunk out of it. You're gonna be so pissed god I hope not.
Speaker 1:My dog was trying to be another host on the podcast, but that's a special guest. Yes, but that's insane because it's like you're trying to catch a break and trying to catch a breath and it's like what the fuck? You know what I mean. And it's like you're trying to catch a break and trying to catch a breath and it's like what the fuck? You know what I mean, and it's such a hard thing to do.
Speaker 2:Before we met. That's how my life was.
Speaker 1:Really.
Speaker 2:All the time, actually, before I met James, my life was always like that, like I told you everybody if you, how do I explain it? Everybody kind of just put me in bad luck together, like yeah, they weren't even surprised anymore. They weren't shocked anymore. They were my best friend's husband for a while called me Murphy. After Murphy's law, anything that can go wrong will go wrong. That's what he would call me Murphy. Because it was like this. It was just a constant all my freaking life. Whatever, the worst thing that could happen, guess what?
Speaker 1:It happened.
Speaker 2:It's going to happen.
Speaker 1:You know what? I get that because I think it's the same thing too. Anything that bad does happen. It just comes in fucking waves. It's not like. It's like okay, cool, we'll give you a break here and there. It's just like woof, woof.
Speaker 2:And you know it's funny, I didn't, I didn't count the things that were going on. But when I was talking to one of my friends specifically and I had told him like oh yeah, dude, my hours, my work hours tanked, my dog passed away and you know, they just broke into my storage, he specifically responded by saying man, why do you, why do shitty things have to happen in threes before it gets better for somebody? And I didn't snap until later, Right, but I was just like that's very weird, Like why did he say that specifically? I've never heard, I've heard of people passing in threes.
Speaker 2:I've never heard of incidences or things happening in threes before things get better. I'm like yeah, I've heard how things get really shitty before it gets better. But I've never heard about a specific number of events, so I was just like I said I didn't respond to that, particularly when he had sent it. I was just kind of like I know, thank you, you know, whatever. But in retrospect I think I'm always like weird, maybe he has that, you know, maybe it's a constant for him.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:If something bad happens, he's going to wait for two more and then it'll get better. And I'm just kind of like huh, I mean, we'll see, I guess.
Speaker 1:You know, that's kind of the same thing. So recently Hubby had an event that he had to go do but he had parked somewhere. But an event that he had to go do but he had parked somewhere. When he went out his car was gone. We thought, oh, not again. And he's calling me. He's like, oh, my car is gone, I got it got repoed, if nothing else can go wrong. And I told him I was like, I don't think your car got repoed. Talk to the nearest officer and go find out. Yeah, he goes. No, he goes. Let me find out. So they find out that anybody who was parked on that side, they moved everyone's cars to a different location, just like around the corner or something like they. They parked your car on your behalf yeah, they just relocated.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I now. I've never heard that before at all, whatsoever it was. It was super interesting, yeah, but he's like son of a bitch, I gotta walk. It's not like well, it's not like it's small, it's like I think it was like two or three blocks down so he had to walk in.
Speaker 2:I would rather walk two or three blocks than know that my shit got repoed and it's in the pound, in the, in the impound yeah, I would too, but it was just one of those things.
Speaker 1:This is like you're just like fuck great. And you're just like fuck Great, and you're just like okay, good, oh, thank God I was going to say I bet you did.
Speaker 2:He's just like you've got to be kidding me, but thank God it wasn't something that I hit his head on the microphone.
Speaker 1:So, but yeah, it's um. It's crazy, though, because you don't think about these things, you know. You're just like why does it? It's always what is. But I've always told people and I'll tell you too, because I'm pretty sure you already know too as well is that when the first bad thing has already happened, you always want to go. Okay, it ends right here, right, this is the last event. Like I swear to god, if you give me anything else beyond this motherfucking point, like you have no respect for me, but that's just me telling the universe that in most cases for me it works out, because it's just like you know what. Whatever you did to me now, it's not going to be no different what you're going to do, because it's just going to. Whatever you did to me now, it's not going to be no different what you're going to do, because it's just going to either A piss me off even more and it's going to make me not want to trust into whatever entity or whatever is happening at all. Period.
Speaker 1:So that's just that's my logic of thinking of course. But 10 out of 10, it always works out for me that way, because it's like dude, you can do whatever the fuck you want, for instance. It's like dude, you could do whatever the fuck you want, like, for instance, it's like always money, and I'm just like shit somehow. It's like how am I broke, how do I have none of this? But I'm thinking in my head oh yeah, I did this, oh yeah, I did that, oh yeah, fuck you know, it's just consequences of choices.
Speaker 1:Yeah but but it's like I look at back at some of the choices I made, I'm just saying, okay, well, that's why I kind of bought groceries so I don't have to worry about going out to eat, right? No, that's not the case, because by the time I get home I'm just like man. I don't fucking feel like cooking anything right now, but it's just these crazy things that just kind of come out of left field. Know, but for me, I've always said I, I put my foot down and I just said no, like you're not okay, I, I get it, I know what you're doing, but we're not going that route you know, what I mean.
Speaker 2:It's just like this is no, yeah, you know what I mean, but it's I get that, but I can't have that mentality because even if I did, even if my work hours tanked and I'm just like, yeah, no, we ain't having it. I have no control over whether my dog lives another day or not.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I have no control over somebody breaking into my store.
Speaker 2:I'm just like I think it's uh, what is it?
Speaker 1:You've heard of the books, the secret, right? Okay, so one of the things I like, she, this is one of my favorite books. I mean, it does go around in circles, but to the point, it's like law of attraction, right. And I hate when people are like, oh, so if I say, if I want this, it's going to come to me. I'm like, oh, first of all, you're kind of being stupid Because it's like and they look at me like, oh, I can't believe you, it's not a genie with three wishes.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it happens, it's.
Speaker 1:You got to put the work and the efforts to be able to do certain things.
Speaker 2:You have to live in that mentality.
Speaker 1:But I've always lived in that mentality, ever since the book came out or when it all started and everything Ow, and the reason is because I got it. Anything you attract, it comes down to you. You know what I mean and how you feel. And that's just kind of like why I tell hubby please stay positive, because and I see it, it, I see it to everybody it, the moment you think or you say what else can possibly go wrong, will eventually go wrong exactly because you're literally asking like oh how much worse can it get?
Speaker 2:and then you're like oh shit, okay, well, here, shit, let me show you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like no, you don't, I do that all the fucking time, but because I test the fucking universes, I'm like you know what, what else can, what else can you give me now?
Speaker 2:that I'm just like. It's just like. Please give me a break, please like like with madam red.
Speaker 1:When I got into that accident. I'm just like. I was like anything else you want to throw at me. Why where? Why we're sitting here, because I just got this fucking car and you already want to throw a fucking curveball at me right now with money. I think you're a fucking dick because it's like it's not just the accident and it does come in. Threes and I'm going to give you this example because the car accident happened. Then you got to go and pay for something. Money that we were supposed to get back from an accident ended up going to that way. So one, two, three, I'm just like you motherfuckers. But just because something has been taken away from you can always be replaced or repaired in most cases, something like yours. That's going to be kind of hard.
Speaker 2:But the main thing we checked was what facebook market and we've got my other friend had to jessie's, like it's a tall order he's you can check some of the pawn shops he goes. The crappy thing is the san antonio there's a lot of exactly and of course we don't know where they live. Yeah, they could live near here because the storage is here, or they can live far away because they used to live near here and they kept their storage here, but now they move, like there could be so many insane amount of scenarios yeah so, but at least they did, at least that storage unit made a police report on your behalf.
Speaker 1:you know what I mean. Yeah, if it's and it sucks, it's just like god damn, because it's a of it's sentimental value for you in a sense, because the person you're your partner's not here anymore, right? So, yeah, it takes a fucking takes a fucking toll on you.
Speaker 2:And it's hard to not get emotional over it, because that's all I have left of my person. You know what I mean. It's not like the most important thing, so I'm just kind of like you know, it is just stuff.
Speaker 2:Can I replace it? Yeah, I mean, it's not going to be the same, but I can replace it. But if it's something I can replace, I'm not worried about it because I'm just like, like my other friends said, it's just things. Yes, they're sentimental, yes, they run deep, but it's just things and I'm like you're right, you're right, that's fine and I get it. The other stuff, I can't get it back.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I can't get it back and I'm just like ugh. And even if you did, it's a miracle. Even if you did, it's a fucking miracle, right? But I do believe in karma and it's highest power, so it'll come to him in tenfold.
Speaker 2:Same and his power. So it'll come to him same in tenfold so same. And you know now that I think about it, I was just like I I should probably go, because you remember that box that was kind of like open and you're like, oh, look they, they took something. I was like, oh, that's the hair stuff that I used to have my salon things. I didn't snap. I have another long box like that where all of my um ofrenda stuff is in there. I need to see if that was in there, because James' things were in there.
Speaker 1:Damn Naturally.
Speaker 2:Because I had it on the ofrenda. So, I need to yup, yup the few things that I'm like okay, I absolutely want to keep these things because they're there with his picture and all of the stuff. So I'm just kind of like I need to go back.
Speaker 2:I need to go back so that I can assess more. Now that my memory is coming back to like what I did have, I'm just like did I see this? Was that there? Did I check? Like I didn't at the time. Like I said, my memory slips. There's so much stuff in there. There's so much stuff made it all to memory, right, but it does suck.
Speaker 1:it does suck and there's nothing I can do about it, except I think I was supposed to be a shenanigans podcast and they were like all sentiment and like it's late, leave us alone I'm gonna go be fat, I just like, think it's very weird.
Speaker 2:Like I, I used to have a really shitty outlook on life because so much bad stuff would happen to me and I'm just like I would get hurt all the time. I would get so hurt because I'm just like yo. What am I doing wrong? I'm nice to everybody I'm a good person. I don't wish bad on nobody. I do everything right by the book, and so it's easy to want to be like why me?
Speaker 1:Why me? Here's my opinion on that at least is that when things like that happen bad things happen to good people Is to test your breaking point. You know what I mean. And rather, if it's a sick sense of humor for whatever the universe wants to kill us?
Speaker 2:how many more years?
Speaker 1:are you trying to test me bro? Yeah, no, but I think that's and it's just like I don't.
Speaker 1:I don't want to say testing, though, but it's like we're just going to kind of give you all this you know what I mean all throughout life, because it's like we don't. We don't dab in like spells and all that stuff. I've done a few spells for here, for you and here, just to kind of like keep everything locked in key for you and for ryan, for myself and whatnot, and it's just like, oh, so we're still this is still fucking happening. So it's just like okay. But I think also, consistency is key as well.
Speaker 1:You know, but it's kind of hard because it's like there's not a spell, there's not there's nothing there's not a magic wand. There's nothing you can do.
Speaker 2:It's gonna happen, it's gonna happen after 44 years of dealing majority I'm sorry, majority of 44 years of dealing with this level of constant whatever you want to call this.
Speaker 1:You're like being born, it was already bad enough. You know shit I don't.
Speaker 2:I I've come to learn, even after searching any, any answers as to why or what, the, what, the fuck, um, I, I don't have anything yeah and I know like to stay neutral, to stay accepting, to stay whatever like. I do try my hardest and I get it. I understand things happen for a reason, whether I'm allowed to know that reason or not. I understand that concept, but that's the best I can get. The best I can get is I'm sorry, there's no answers.
Speaker 1:Great.
Speaker 2:What am I supposed to do with that, bro? It's really hard to continue living normally and not expect shit, and that's where it plays into the law of attraction. It's hard. All my life, except for 13 years, all my life, it's been like this right so I'm? I wake up every day and I'm already afraid, like don't let nothing bad happen today. Don't let nothing bad happens. That why? Because I'm so used to it being a constant, dude, constant. So what happens?
Speaker 1:and I'm like you're like shit, of course, of course yeah I think that's one of the main things.
Speaker 1:I'm just like when I wake up in the first morning, my affirmation is like okay, let's go, let's uh, let's get today started. It's gonna it's gonna be okay, let's go, let's get today started, it's going to be a good day. But I think that works for me Because, even though I do wake up and sometimes it's never a good day, because when I get to work or when I go somewhere, I'm just like so, okay, lay it onto me thick, what happened? You know what I mean? Well, this and this and this, you're just like okay.
Speaker 1:So I always take a deep breath Okay, great, what's the solution? What is the outcome? What are my options? And most cases there are solutions, most cases there are options. Right, so that's, that's something I always look forward to is the solution and the options. Now, if I don't have an option or solution, bitch, I'm gonna fucking find one. You know what I mean? It's like I, but that's just mind mentality, that when I think about it and it doesn't work for everybody, because everybody's always telling me I can't think like you, thank fucking god, because so I can think like that you know, but if it's a situation where I can't, there is, there are no options, there is no solution.
Speaker 2:You know what?
Speaker 1:I mean of course as fucked up as this may be for me and to even say this out loud, I'm going to choose my words carefully on this people who have lost their family members and everything I'm just like and mine are still around because they're fucking bad. I'm just like shit, and I always tell my grandmother you're not getting any younger, anything. That's like, you need to take care of yourself and whatnot, and I'm just thinking, god damn, maybe the wicked jews do this longer, I don't know. Uh, and and it's sad because anybody who thinks like that about whoever it is they don't say it out loud, you know, but for me I'm just like bitch go. I think it was like that for me and my sister when I heard about the whole accident and everything. I'm just like, yes, she survived, fuck.
Speaker 1:And it's a horrible thing to say, though, but, like I said, my mindset and my mentality is just that I. I don't believe the wicked should still be around, for whatever reason, but for whatever reason, these fuckers last longer than fucking cockroaches, and I'm just like, oh shit, but. But it doesn't mean that karma doesn't come back to bite them in the ass, right, because we do see it along the way with everybody, but it gives you so less hope on everything because it's like what do you do here? How is it somebody so bad doing so great and how is somebody so good doing so bad? You know what I mean. So my output is just like it doesn't. It's not making sense. You know what I mean. But that's just me looking at the universe through a fucking magnifying glass and seeing it and I I think this, just it just goes to shows like how well you know the game.
Speaker 1:If you don't know the game very well, you're're not going to get anywhere, and I think that's a lot of us. I think that's why I'm kind of going back to school a bit. It's because I want to learn the game a little bit better. You know what I mean. So this kind of brings up the whole like I know that when you read my composition for English, you're just like bitch for english and you're just like bitch. I'm just like, actually, this is actually a really good point structure for it because of how it's put together. You know what I mean. So it kind of gives me more of an outlook. It helps me open the, the broad aspect of getting more people in. You know I mean because there is that open conversation for a lot of people who have dealt with what, you deal with what?
Speaker 1:I dealt with and people can can relate to that on a whole fucking level. I think that's why we have this is because, bitch, we're fucking adults, this is what we go through and no one talks about dealing with some adult bullshit.
Speaker 1:Oh man fucking big ass adult bullshit. Because it gives us two different perspective. It gives you your perspective, who's very, um, very in tune to your emotions, and I'm very in tune to my emotions, but my emotions are more blah, I guess, if you would say I don't know, uh, I don't know if that's what you want to call it, but I I feel that's how it is, because I don't. I do cry when death happens, cause I did cry for my girl, for Nezuko, and I don't know how my feelings or my reactions would be if somebody in my own family was to pass on, because I don't know what that would be like because of everything that has gone through and anybody who's been through that you're just like you don't know what that would be like because of everything that has gone through and anybody who's been through that you're just like you don't know you know, like, yeah, like you empathize but, to a limit right
Speaker 1:because you can't um, you can't know where they're coming, the place where they're coming, yeah yet, see, this is why I'm so in love with my relationship, is because I do love my partner to death, to the point where, if anything bad was to happen, I probably would go fucking crazy, because you know what I mean and vice versa. I know we always joke and talk about this. You're like, you know, if I, oh, if I die, you're taken care of. There's money that's gonna be taken care.
Speaker 1:But it's just like, oh, shit, now I can't die because I gotta wait for you know, things have kind of pass over to you know we're in the hunger games right now, like, we're definitely in there. You know, let the odds forever be in your favor. It's literally that, because, as you, the more you think about it, the more shit happens. You're just like damn, and I always, I always find things amusing because, okay, so the whole like we talked about the whole fires in california and whatnot, and people who have money, who built their life up and everything, who lost everything, could possibly rebuild it again because they have the funds and the means to do it, the publicity and all that stuff. And they're just like, oh, I gotta do it again.
Speaker 1:And like, pro, you got millions of, you don't got you got the opportunity you got the opportunity to rebuild your life if you wanted to, but that those who don't, we don't get that chance. We don't get that opportunity. The government doesn't give us that opportunity to be able to rebuild and salvage to what we have. That's why a lot of us are so angry. I think this is why a lot of us are so depressed. This is why a lot of us are so sad, because we're dealing with fucking pressure after pressure, after pressure, and when you don't got the money or the funds, you lose everything you're. This is yeah, I get where you're coming from.
Speaker 2:It's hard.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they're materialistic things. Things happen for a reason that you're not meant to have, just like your friend said yeah, that's a very fucking good thing to say, but God damn, you had to cut me that.
Speaker 2:Thank you.
Speaker 1:You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:I'm like I don't have much to begin, exactly. I don't have much to begin with and you're gonna take the little bit.
Speaker 1:I got bro like yeah, but you know, I don't think it comes from a malice place. It's like it's somebody who's like kind of like looking through and telling you like I wouldn't say it's like holding a child's hand. It's literally like get your fucking ass over here, bitches. This is what you're trying to learn. I'm trying to teach you, you know I. But it's it's not. No, but take anybody.
Speaker 2:Stuff like yeah I meant universe, bro not, not my friends. No, I know very cool and understanding and giving me their wisdom so that I can have the freaking strength, and that's another thing I was gonna say earlier. Um, the best piece of advice for dealing with my life ever since my loss came from his mother.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah.
Speaker 2:I had like probably the worst breakdown. I honestly don't remember how much time afterwards, but I was after he passed. I would go to his uh, stay at his house every weekend because we live separately, right, so I would go and stay at his house every single weekend. It was like clockwork. The only time we were ever apart was the two weeks that we had to be quarantined when we had covid. That's the the longest we've ever been apart. Yeah, um, and even then I was positive. He was positive, but I was symptomless.
Speaker 2:And when his sister and his mom kept calling like can you try to tell him? You know, can he please eat? Can he, you know, do this, can he do that? Because he's not, he's not doing it for us, he's not listening, you know whatever. And I would call and you could tell he was tired, he. So he was starting to get attitude because everybody was on him like dude, you need to this, you need to that. So I decided like I'm just gonna go. I was and my, my mom was just like, really like you're positive, this whole house is positive, his whole house is positive. You're just gonna like go so you can get it again, or whatever. I'm just like, and if I do, I do like, I'm symptomless anyways.
Speaker 2:Maybe, I get it. Maybe I'll get symptoms, maybe I won't, you know whatever. But I'm glad I did, because that was the last time that I was able to see him.
Speaker 2:It was weird how everything went. It was so weird how everything went down. In retrospect it's just like yo, you can't deny that whatever was meant to happen that evening happened. But anyways, I had a really bad breakdown and his mom was so sweet, she was consoling me, she sat next to me on the sofa and she kind of like cradled me, like coddled me, kind of like a baby.
Speaker 2:And she just soothed me and she was talking the whole time just like a freaking angel dude. I swear that lady's an angel, um, and she said because I told her you know like how hard it was or whatever, and of course she can sympathize. But she said every day when you wake up, have gratitude that you woke up and then just ask for the strength that you're going to need for the day. That's it. That's it. And I'm just kind of like how in my head, I'm like how is that supposed to help me? How it like really the weird thing was I do it every morning and it works out. Yeah, it works out like obviously, because look what happens right and I'm still.
Speaker 2:I'm not blowing up, I'm not freaking out, I'm not losing my shit and just you know going nuts or what.
Speaker 1:I'm surprised you haven't just like broken yeah like fuck this, I can't do it because this is the side of iris. I am like a lot of people. How do I consult this?
Speaker 2:a lot of people do this like oh my god, like you're so strong and I'm just like I'm not choosing to be bro. I have no choice. I legit have no choice. It's either I I just continue and accept sure I can cry my heart out in the corner or something. But if I don't just continue, what happens to me? I break and I completely lose myself. I'm going to shut down and then I won't. I won't be right. I will never be right.
Speaker 1:I ever wonder people listen to us and just be like these bitches are fucking strong, or just like, God damn, I fucking like that's something I get that a lot, or just like god damn, I fucking like yeah, that's something, I get that a lot.
Speaker 2:when people like find, the more they find out about what I've gone through, they're just like, oh my god, they're like I, I don't. Oh girl, I couldn't. If it was me, I would. They would say I would have gone off, I would have, just I would have lost my mind. Like I know, like I know what the average reaction would have been yeah, I'm just not that kind of person like I.
Speaker 1:I don't know, what does it mean?
Speaker 2:yeah, I mean. Well, you know what I mean but I'm just like what do you want me to do? Right in all honesty, what is that going to do for me? Right I already freaking my my heart's already broken, bro, like it is what it is, and I I still deal with it on a daily basis. What more do you want me to do? Do you literally want me to go postal? Like, what is it going to do for me? It?
Speaker 2:ain't going to do shit. It's not going to do shit. And then it's like oh my God, like you're so strong, I'm like I don't think I am. Thanks, I don't want to be rude. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:Like cool is strong because I'm the freaking titty baby in the corner that's crying all day, every day, at home because of the shit that's consistent in my life. I'm just like my life sucks. You know what I mean like I don't think that I'm strong, but I get how. From the outsider's perspective, I probably look strong as fuck because I've been through what I've been through and I'm still every day like oh, happy hunky dory and making jokes and everything's cool and then inside you're just dying and inside I am freaking dead.
Speaker 1:I'm already dead you're like spongebob with the suds inside that's hilarious, you know, it's really funny.
Speaker 2:The friends that I've been making online or whatever, of course, of course there's always going to be those dudes. They're like, oh hey, what's up? And I'm just like, yeah, not, not this. I'll tell you that straight up not this I'm cool meeting new people, making new friends, but if once you start to be like oh hey, like can we get to know each other? Like that, I'm going to tell you straight up I'm not looking for nothing to tell you straight up, I'm not looking for nothing.
Speaker 2:I'm not looking for anybody, I'm not looking for a relation. They're like, oh, and of course they start asking questions. I'll be like, I'll tell you, I'll tell you straight up why. You know what I mean. And I'll tell them, like I mean, what am I going to hide? You know what?
Speaker 1:get lonely, but I'm I'm not one of those people that needs to satisfy anything so I'm like, oh, I'm just gonna jump into this dude because he, he likes me, like that's just weird to me, that's very weird. Yeah, and I appreciate that you said that, because there's some people that fucking jump at the opportunity just to have.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I think these guys expect it because they're just like, because they prey on those who are who a lot. You know what I mean Probably.
Speaker 1:Because they feel as if you are going to be weak, in a sense.
Speaker 2:And this is not just for women, this is also for men, yeah.
Speaker 1:You know what I mean, because we are in a vulnerable spot, no matter what it is. You know what I mean Mm-hmm, and sometimes I get bitch if I can show you half the fucking messages. I get Like, hey, how's it going good? You, oh, that's good, hey, um, you know, I think you're really cute, you're really handsome, and you know, I think you're really gorgeous, and you know, and this and that, and I'll fucking, I'll fucking reel it in sure, thank you, I appreciate it. Blah, blah, blah, blah. Oh, my god, would you like to see a dick pic?
Speaker 2:fuck, yeah, I would yeah, see how you go there. I'll think I'll thank them for the compliment, but I think there's a difference between you and I.
Speaker 1:Me, it's just like I'm gonna fucking egg you on and you come in, it's fine. I mean, I'll show you mine too.
Speaker 2:I don't care it's like you know whatever that's funny once they start doing.
Speaker 1:I'm just like now you know what?
Speaker 2:let me stop you right there I think that's the difference between me and you.
Speaker 1:You're just like fuck off. I'm just like keep it going, I'd be like oops, I'd be.
Speaker 2:Like I'll be nice.
Speaker 1:Thanks for the compliment, but Like shit, I'm getting free content.
Speaker 2:Let me stop you right there, sir, and it's cool. There are very few, very few, that will actually continue a friendship connection online, um, and, of course, little by little, like doing those because you don't know these people in real life. You know what?
Speaker 2:I mean, yeah, it's whatever it's whatever, but they were respectful enough to be like I'm cool with that I'm cool beans, but majority of them they just poof and I'm just like, yeah, because, yeah, because that's what your intention was in the beginning, bro. So I, rather than drag it all on and waste everybody's time, like, look, let me just tell you what's what.
Speaker 2:Okay, because let me show you what's going on please do not waste my time, because I'm gonna get bored with this shit really fast, because I'm just like I already know what you're doing. I know what you're going for. Homeboy like ain't gonna happen, you know. And he's like, oh, but, but nothing, just just end it, just lose it.
Speaker 1:It's cool you can unfollow me, it's fine, let it go.
Speaker 2:Yeah, let it go it's hilarious, I think the funniest, the funniest thing that they've ever said is like oh, you're too pretty to be by yourself. Oh my god, shut up, please eat a bag of dicks thank you.
Speaker 2:I'm just like you don't even know me. What does pretty have to do with anything? That's that pretty privilege. Bullshit too, by the way, I, if you think I'm pretty, sir, how many times do you think I've heard I'm pretty in my entire life? And of all those people that have told me, how many do you think actually love me, for me?
Speaker 1:see what I'm saying, like I think I thought I could I get some messages like if you don't tell me, I'm gonna tell your husband that you and I talk. Oh, he knows, he's right next to me. The fuck you mean be like.
Speaker 2:What do you mean? I've been showing my husband the text messages this whole time.
Speaker 1:I was like we're laughing at you, Dumb bitch. You know what I'm going to blast her Bitch. I got a fucking page dedicated to nudes. You'd be doing me a service.
Speaker 2:Thank you You'd be giving me the attention. So sure, by all means, maybe I'll go viral. Go ahead.
Speaker 1:I need to go viral, say. You said you love me, you care for me.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I say that to everybody so you're not fucking special.
Speaker 1:And then I not to be mean, because I know some people do this, but for me, on the other hand, when I get guys like that, I like to tell guys what they want to hear. If I say certain things, hubby knows like did you really say that to him? Yeah, why? Because it's fun. I got nothing else better to do. You're just fucking toying at their heartstrings. Yeah, because they're toying at mine. So I'm having fun like what it was. Love you, babe. Oh, my god, I love you too. Thank you so much. I want to be with you, ken. How I would get you. Fine, I can't be quite as soon. I'm here with my family, husband, and I can't leave him. We're, we're so indebted with each other.
Speaker 2:That's hilarious oh, it's so fucking fun it's so, and I gotta be careful, though, because one of these days, is gonna bite me in the ass I could never go well, I told you that, though the other night, like I'm, I'm, I'm that person where, oh yeah, she's so nice, she's so sweet, you know, blah, blah, blah. But if there's an issue in a relationship, I will say what needs to be said. No problem, no problem. So when it comes to that, like I said, people are, you know, trying to talk to me or whatever, and I'm like please don't.
Speaker 1:I don't get time for all that nope no, because you can tell off the bat.
Speaker 2:This is like look, dude, I, I get it. You're trying to be respectful enough to play the long game. No, I'm. It's just too crazy.
Speaker 1:The ones that do my favorite one is like hey, if you look, I'm looking for a sugar baby.
Speaker 2:Uh, then wanting to pay two or three thousand for I'm just like for real when I got on that trend thing and I just started getting like all of these followers, I delete them all because they get on my nerves for the inbox to fill up that much. But the amount of message requests specifically asking if I want to be a sugar baby to men, to women, whatever I'm just like, I probably delete like 40 something. Shit man, I was just like something Shit man. I was just like y'all are stupid, I know.
Speaker 1:Do you want to be my sugar baby? No bitch.
Speaker 2:And if it's not that First of all. Oh, can I bless your cash app? I'm like, yeah, can I send you money, just what it to? Can I send you some? Some dude actually said oh, what'd he say Can I send? You money just to admire you or some shit like that, not just like jesus. I was like where do you guys come up with this shit? I think it's gonna work like this.
Speaker 1:Just the stupidity just run through your blood.
Speaker 2:I think so it's just it's.
Speaker 1:It's so fun to see it is. I think that's the difference between you and I, because I will have fun with it, but I already know when to stop once I get the message hey, you want to be my sugar baby? I'm just like no, I'm not fucking with that yeah no, thank you. Yeah, and even now, like I get a lot of spam to I get so much fam, fucking, spam text messages.
Speaker 1:It is fucking ridiculous. Like the amount, hey, how's it going good? Um, hey, so. And so I actually had someone who called me and said oh, it was a girl on the other lane. Like hey, is this? Like no, I think you got the wrong number and then messaged me on the side sorry, I didn't mean to get you in trouble. I'm like you're good, whatever, bye. And they're like oh, we can be friends. I'm like, no, like, why not? I'm just like, because I said so. Like honey, I'm gay, but it's me. I'm just like. And it's even worse because the name was jessica. It's me, I'm just like. And it's even worse because the name was Jessica. It's me, jessica. And what is the picture of A fucking? It's either Filipino, asian or whatnot, it's always them. It's always that particular picture. I'm just like.
Speaker 2:You know what? It's funny. Majority of the the dudes that are, you know, trying to hit up my inbox, the, the scammer accounts. Majority of them use men, men's photos that are like in one of the branches of military yeah for what?
Speaker 2:and then of course you go and they've got followers and they follow people, but they only have like one or two photos or five videos and if you look at like the oldest one, it was just all of them were posted like just four days ago and I'm like right right, yeah, and it's like hashtag new mexico hashtag, whatever camp. Yet the location they tag is like nigeria and I'm like yeah, oh yeah, because you can be in New Mexico and in Nigeria at the same time.
Speaker 1:Like dumb fuck. It was just so fucking hilarious. So it's good, it's funny to see these things transpire.
Speaker 2:You know what I?
Speaker 1:mean, and I'm just like, why? Why are we? Why do people feel the need? But it's just so funny because they're trying to find the one person who they can prey on. Yeah, you know as vulnerable as they can be, and I see it all the time, I see it all the time, which is funny because, like I said, I'm cool with people.
Speaker 2:I'm cool and I don't like to jump the gun and be judgmental from the get-go. So they're like, hey, you know. And I'm like hi, you know. And they're like, oh, what's up, where you from, you know, whatever, and I'm like america, america, all right, it's either that or it's texas texas and then that's it.
Speaker 1:Like I, I give you, I always went san antonio texas.
Speaker 2:What the fuck you want I give no information, I think.
Speaker 1:I've been in San Antonio, I've been in Michigan, I've been in Florida. That's funny. I think I'm going to start just putting that I'm from Nigeria.
Speaker 2:My favorite thing is they're always asking like can we take this to? And it's like a fully encrypted chat, and I'm like right, so you can do whatever it is you need to do. And there's no, no period at all. And I'm just like no, and I'll tell them, like I don't have them why don't you? Just go to the app store and install it. I don't have space in my phone.
Speaker 2:It's literally full like I don't have room for it, have you? Have you cleaned it out yet? Like no, and I'm not going to. Just for you, like, like, who are you bro? It's funny, it's funny.
Speaker 1:It's like that with the fuck. I hate it and I have it only downloaded because I get leather from this particular person. But he only has the WhatsApp app and I'm just like and I think that's where a lot of my spam, I'm just like yeah, I have WhatsApp too, because it's good for business when you deal with international merchants.
Speaker 2:But unfortunately, yeah, a lot of spam comes through on the WhatsApp app.
Speaker 1:I get it a lot. I think that's why a lot of text messages are coming through. I'm just like dude. I can only respond to so many fucking messages. I just downloaded Signal.
Speaker 2:Signal, yeah, because it's so safe. I mean not that people still can't use it for malintent, but the encryption and all of that safety stuff. It's so top tier, Even the military uses it. So I was just like cool, See that. And an IT guy is the one that suggested it. Because of all of this stuff that's been going on, you know, with everything.
Speaker 2:He's just like if you use this switch to been going on, you know, with everything he's just like if you use this switch to this, if you use this switch to that, like he was telling everybody that way your stuff stays protected.
Speaker 1:I'm like thanks got it yeah, thanks for the tips sir, but it's, it's just so funny to see even even I know the one person who keeps messaging me like I hope you fucking die.
Speaker 1:I'm just like I love that they take their time out of the day, just to fucking just, and I know who it is and I know who it is, and it's just like it's funny to me it's funny because it's like thank you for thinking of me and how much you want to kill me, and which I love, because I don't know anybody who wants to kill me out loud.
Speaker 2:Because the first thing that goes through my head is what is your life lacking? So much of that you're. You literally take time out of your day to think of some random person that you're close to just to continue to talk crap Like and they keep begging it on.
Speaker 1:Have you not let it go? Begging it on, have you not let it go? They keep egging it on it's just so funny.
Speaker 2:Do you have issues Obsessed much?
Speaker 1:And it's funny because they're using ghost numbers and they don't have the balls to be able to say it in their own fucking real number.
Speaker 2:You're going to be doing it on a regular? At least have the balls.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like face me, so I know message comes up. But I actually did like something that someone posted on tiktok that the people that she doesn't delete none of the numbers off her phone like she has like, say, a, like 100 and something context and she doesn't talk to these people. But the reason being is because if they want to reach out, she'll know who it is, but she puts a gravestone on each one of those to remind her that these people are dead to her. Okay, yeah, I'm like bitch. I love that Because that is amazing.
Speaker 2:That's definitely a Jesse thing.
Speaker 1:Very, and I'm just like this is fucking awesome.
Speaker 2:Mine is like you go to my contact you're like you've got like 30 people, yeah, like that's it, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:So what happened to everybody else? I deleted them.
Speaker 1:It's gone, See what I want to do is I want to have two phones and hear me out. The two phones I just want to give all my close friends my number and those who I don't like. If I just meet you for the first time, you're gonna get this number and everyone who has this number, it would be just this.
Speaker 2:so in this way, don't? Why don't you just get like the free phone numbers from?
Speaker 1:that's too much work for google voice. You literally sign up well, because I do have. I have google voice, but those numbers only last for so long or something, and then you have to pay for a membership and all that shit.
Speaker 2:So I think well, as long as you use it yeah, which is fine, because I'll just text or I'll just call with that number, like when I'm calling places like oh, what are your operating hours?
Speaker 1:what time?
Speaker 2:do I close today? Or oh, do y'all have this or that? I'll use that number for that kind of stuff I don't even think about that yeah, and it stays.
Speaker 1:It stays connected I don't know I I prefer to have it that way. So I know that well, for one, I would probably have an iPhone for that bullshit too. So and just keep my Android.
Speaker 2:Yeah, my sister has both an Android and an iPhone.
Speaker 1:Yeah so.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:I could never iPhone or.
Speaker 2:Android. Which one do you guys have?
Speaker 1:Which one do you prefer?
Speaker 2:Because I shit on everybody that has Apple. I don't care.
Speaker 1:So do I, so do I I have never. It's so much better in the bubble it has to be blue.
Speaker 2:Since I've been in the sixth grade I have loathed Apple, loathed it. Since sixth grade. They're like oh, you just have to go to the computer lab and go do your report. Like it. Since sixth grade they're like oh, you just have to go to the computer lab and go do your report. Like cool beans, there's no lab, there's no computers available. Like, oh, yeah, the Macs are. There's no computers available. Like, I ain't going to touch it.
Speaker 2:I ain't going to touch it. They're like why not? Because my floppy disks, my little three by five disks, are not for Mac. That's why they're like, oh well, you could just buy them. No, I'm not going to spend extra to get an additional thing just because I have to use that one. Hell to the no.
Speaker 1:I'll wait until the other ones will free up.
Speaker 2:It wasn't considered cheap at the time, unfortunately.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's true.
Speaker 2:I liked the little, tiny, hard ones. Those were much better.
Speaker 1:The colorful ones.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:Those were so cute.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:Remember those little ones I gave my mom. I was like, just get the black ones. I'm like, but the colorful ones are so cute. We don't got money for that, we just get the black ones, I'm fine. I don't want to.
Speaker 2:You're a bitch. I was the oldest of three kids, and three girls at that. We shared everything, so I was used to not having that stuff, and after a while I was kind of like, hey, it's cool, I don't need it.
Speaker 1:It's crazy. I don't need it. This has been an amazing journey.
Speaker 2:It feels, good it, it has it feels good, just nice little conversation I think, um, and I had joked about it, I put it on facebook saying that january was my trial month. So my 2025 is going to start, to you know, february 1st, which even then it's not because for me the real New Year's in Aries season, but whatever I digress, my thing was like, oh, january was my trial, and it's funny, that was just a joke. But when I was looking at my astrology stuff, january was supposed to be a month for, uh, cleansing and purging, and I'm like a big ass purge thank you.
Speaker 2:I was like the universe did that shit for me, bro. I didn't even do it, I didn't even thanks did you have to take my stuff, though. Thank you, I'm just like wow that, like that. Though did you have to be that aggressive like hey?
Speaker 1:I still wanted to keep all of that Fuck bitch.
Speaker 2:Why didn't they take the clothes or something? Why did they take the stupid stuff?
Speaker 1:Take the stuff that's not worth anything, because that would be too fucking easy to do.
Speaker 2:So from here on out it's supposed to be a whole lot better for me.
Speaker 1:Well, we've come to the end of the podcast. So much for shenanigans. Yeah, I never got a chance. I don't know if I said my dog, my puppy's name, it's Mushu.
Speaker 2:That's a good question. I know you mentioned it.
Speaker 1:I mentioned I have a new dog, but I was over here too busy trying to fight him off my fucking foot. God damn, dude, that's my foot. But no, his name is Mushu, because he's a. Apparently he's a Shih Tzu, mixed with other stuff too as well, so he's a mixed puppy, but he has more Shih Tzu on him, so it's really cute. So his little fuzz in the front, it's really really cute. I gotta get used to him. I gotta get him trimmed with scissors and everything and whatnot. Yeah, so he can kind of get used to the grooming process.
Speaker 1:So we'll see how he does fun yeah, otherwise he's gonna just get in his eyes and whatnot, and the last thing I need is to have eye problems. But anywho, moral of the story of all of this is happening. Fuck you, is that a good one?
Speaker 2:That was awesome.
Speaker 1:Moral of the story I've never heard of was awesome. More of the story I've never heard of that being the moral of any story Hilarious Fuck you life 10 out of 10, don't recommend it. And for those who are young and wanting to grow up don't Stay your age.
Speaker 2:Stay young at heart.
Speaker 1:Stay young in your head at don't, don't. Don't go and buy a beer or drugs. Save it, put it away somewhere. So in this way, you'd be like I listen to the mature mischief and because of you I'm doing great things, because of your broke ass, I'm doing better. Please, more of the story.
Speaker 2:Please fuck off go after whatever it is that you are happy to do for the rest of your life exactly and let that, let that fund your life let it I.
Speaker 1:I think that's kind of like the main thing, like us it's. It's too much work to be us. I think someone had said that, like if you could trade places with anybody on earth, who would it be? And the person says I don't think I want to trade spaces with any. The shithole that I went through I wouldn't want anybody to go through that. I was like I'll take that shithole from you Because there's a bunch of people I can pass it on to real quick for you.
Speaker 2:The question is would they survive it?
Speaker 1:I quick for you. The question is would they survive it? I don't give a fuck. They can die. Let them have it, I'll take. Let me take your pain, I'll take it like it's I. We've talked about this. It's because it's like I know I said the end of the podcast, but we've talked about this because everyone says I would never wish that on my worst enemy I'm like wait on me can.
Speaker 1:Can I take that from you? Because I got a few people that are willing they can have it. Because I'm I'm an equal opportunist, I'm a I'm a non-profit hoe. I'll take it and give it to someone else for you. Oh, I couldn't do that. I couldn't, I could, I could. I know the next bitch who probably needs your cancer and not be able to manage it as well as you did, so I'll take it from you. I'm like we'll have sclerosis. I'll take that from you and give it to somebody else who's willing, who's who's not deserving of it. I'm so horrible, but tell me I'm wrong. Tell me I'm wrong like don't, don't, don't, say you would never wish it on your worst enemy, because god knows as much people who have fucked me in the ass and fucked me good without lube. I'm just like, bitch, I got something for you. Hold on, hey, who has the worst shit ever? Because I'm willing to pass that shit on real quick to somebody like and you know what I'm normally not.
Speaker 2:I'm not, I'm that person, I'm that person that won't wish you know. The funny thing is, when I was explaining to one of my friends the whole everything that happened with the break-in, um, I was, I was pissed at that. At that particular moment I was pissed right, naturally, so I told him. I said there is this tiny little silver lining is I have the power cords in a bag in the store you gotta go buy your own power cord you're gonna have to.
Speaker 2:I mean, it's not a big fu to them, you know, but it's a minor inconvenience and it's okay that'll'll do for me. But I told him and I said, speaking of minor inconveniences, I hope any minor inconvenience that can happen to them happens to them. I hope every single thing that they eat gives them the most horrible shit.
Speaker 1:They wake up every morning and fucking stub their toe.
Speaker 2:And I hope they don't find a toilet in time. And if they do, I hope they don't find a toilet in time, and if they do, I hope there is no TP. That's what I hope. Everything they eat gives them horrible shit. I hope when you wake up you stub your toe you get a fucking I hope you get a fucking thing stuck between your toe and your skin. I hope you lose every important key that you need for everything.
Speaker 1:I hope your phone's. Whenever it's on 1%, you can't find a charger. I hope every time you go to the store and you're trying to swipe your card, your EBT says decline. I'll make a list.
Speaker 2:I will make a list of every minor inconvenience.
Speaker 1:That can happen, every minor inconvenience I hope when you turn on the playstation all your shit's wiped clean.
Speaker 2:Oh my god, I did though I did, and it was just funny like I mean I was joking about the whole because I knew, and I know it's like stupid outlandish, but I did. And it was just funny, like I mean I was joking about the whole because I knew, and I know it's like stupid outlandish, but I did say it's like you know what my bad I was.
Speaker 1:Like I'm, I'm just still I'm so, I'm still, I'm so fucking better I told him.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I told him. Obviously I'm still hella upset about it. He was like you do not have to apologize for that, dude, like I'm sorry that happened yeah, this is. I know it's cool.
Speaker 1:No, I get it.
Speaker 2:I was like thank you for hearing me whine about it Like a total teddy baby dude and he was like don't do that, this is why I'm so leery of letting people into my place.
Speaker 1:Because my sister says, embedded into me you can't trust a motherfucker coming into your house, period, because you never know and trade is so hard. Because you're like, yeah, I can host, and you're just like, maybe not like I don't trust you, but but I do like it. Because if I do have trade here and have the dogs here, I'm just like, oh, you can't touch them because they'll fuck you up, dude yeah, you know, yeah, which will already deter them from trying to do anything here without you here and, uh, I'm the worst fucking person.
Speaker 1:I bite worse than they do so, but anywho, all right, guys, girls, they's them's, everyone in between my gremlins this is the mature mischief podcast. I am your host, jesse james and I am your co-host, stevie until we meet again. Latest love ya, bye.
