Mature Mischief podcast
Greetings, Gremlyns!
Join us on the Mature Mischief podcast with your Host Jesse James and Co-Host Dee Dee.
Embark on a journey filled with mishaps, awkward moments, and adulting wins. Prepare to laugh, cringe, and nod along with every episode!
Ready to embrace the chaos of adulting and find solace in shared experiences? Let the Mature Mischief Podcast guide you through the ups and downs of life.
Don't miss out on the genuine hilarity that comes with being a grown-up. We'll show you how to turn mundane moments into comedic gold!
Mature Mischief Podcast: Because growing up may be tough, but finding humor in it is always a joy! Tune in now!
Mature Mischief podcast
Creating Your World: Handmade Dreams and DIY Nightmares
Creative spirits run wild in this episode as we dive headfirst into the chaotic world of arts and crafts! From transforming cherished t-shirts into memory-preserving pillows to debating the therapeutic merits of sewing, we're exploring the handmade revolution happening in our homes.
Jesse shares his journey into fabric arts, revealing how frustration with ill-fitting clothes has sparked a passionate desire to create custom garments. Meanwhile, I confess my tragic history with sewing machines – apparently, I possess some mysterious power that breaks every one I touch! We laugh about our various craft failures while celebrating those unexpected creative victories that keep us coming back for more.
Beneath the laughter lies an exploration of why we create things with our hands in an age when almost everything can be purchased ready-made. Whether it's the satisfaction of solving problems, expressing our unique personalities, or simply saving money, crafting connects us to something fundamentally human. By the end, you'll understand why we believe crafting is worth the investment, frustration, and occasional failure – even when our dogs try to "help" in the most unhelpful ways possible!
Platforms
Breather break
what's up, gremlins? Welcome back to another podcast. My name is jesse james. I hope everyone is doing it and doing it well. You know the drill. This is the mature mischief podcast.
Speaker 2:You know, I'm so sad okay, that came out of nowhere. What why?
Speaker 1:because easter is already over, and that means no more peeps this year oh, I was just like really it's like they're who cares, but it was the peeps. It's the peeps. I thought you were leading with easter.
Speaker 2:I'm like are you kidding me?
Speaker 1:no, yeah, it's like halloween halloween's over. Uh, because candy corn, um, I do. I do love a good candy corn for Halloween, for the fall, that's the only time I I do have my seasonal treats. My seasonal treats are my seasonal. So Valentine's Day is my chocolates, the hard chocolates with the sort of variety, flavors and everything. Those are my favorite ones Around that time. Then Easter rolls around, then it's the peeps. What's after Easter? Father's Day is the sealets babies. It's.
Speaker 2:I can't with you today, oh my God, I can't with you today. Oh my god, I can't with you today. He scared you, oh my god, I feel so. Now he's backing that ass up on me. Dear lord, sir, he's so aggressive in his freaking twerking.
Speaker 1:You almost punched him in the face. I almost did.
Speaker 2:I'm so sorry, babe, I'm so sorry, oh my god.
Speaker 1:Oh god, I know it, you know it, the whole world fucking knows it. I like say my name twice. I am your host, jesse James.
Speaker 2:And I'm your scaredy cat ass. Co-host. Dee Dee.
Speaker 1:What it do, sister Dee.
Speaker 2:Dear Lord.
Speaker 1:Dee Dee. This has been a really fun week because we've well one. I've been busy and I've been kind of a little behind on the episodes a bit.
Speaker 2:So that's been kind of kicking me in the ass just a tad bit um, but it's been so fucking amazing, oh my god, and it just turned into asmr for peep eating. Okay, I'll take your word for it.
Speaker 1:I don't know what it is. They're so soft and chewy because it's marshmallow it's so much better than marshmallow, though I guess it's a marshmallow.
Speaker 2:I don't like marshmallows but apparently there's the.
Speaker 1:There's a root that stems that's called marshmallow root.
Speaker 2:Tigger buddy, he was legit trying to lick the pot. Yeah, he was. I know he was he's trying to get to it.
Speaker 1:Stop it, buddy. Um, there's a root called marshmallow root that they use to make the marshmallows, but marshmallows had to stand from trying to make your gut healthy interesting yeah, so marshmallow at the time before they have all the preservatives, and now was a preventative or a herbal for uh, for your gut wow, yeah, I did not know that. Yeah that's a good note. And is it good now for your good?
Speaker 2:no, it gives you diabetes bad for your gut and your grill, all that sugary sugar.
Speaker 1:I know, tell, tell me about it. But you know, today we're going to talk about arts and crafts. Today Very crafty, because we've been in a very crafty mood for a while.
Speaker 2:I don't have any dollars, sir, you can stop giving me a lap dance.
Speaker 1:Dude, you're not a drag queen, get away.
Speaker 2:I love how your dogs always try to give me lap dances. That's hilarious. It would be awesome if I had a little container up here for treats.
Speaker 1:But then they would do it all the time. So I'm like no, better, not Because I do it just as a joke.
Speaker 2:Yeah, he's like peace, I'm like oh, I get a lap dance. Cool, here's a treat, dude.
Speaker 1:Here's a treat Dude, dude. You can't have this dude.
Speaker 2:But then they'd be doing it 24-7, so never mind.
Speaker 1:You can't have this. My mouth was open.
Speaker 2:Okay, I'll take it from your mouth.
Speaker 1:Sorry, bro Go.
Speaker 2:That's hilarious, Sir. I know you got food.
Speaker 1:My goodness. So my pillows are coming along. Slowly but surely they have been coming along. Today has been kind of a not a lazy day, but a day just to kind of get things done. I got a few shirts stabilized, which is great. They looked really, really nice. I went down to John's place because he had a lot of fabric that he was using, so I'm going to see how I can intertwine those fabrics to be able to create some stuff, and I actually found some fabric that I forgot that I had. So, dope dude, I just need to iron it out so it's nice and flat, awesome, yeah. And then sew it in. So I'm actually kind of looking forward to that as well. Uh, what do you got going on?
Speaker 2:I have a commissioned fifth element painting that I need to start, but I don't have the size of. I've got all these canvases. I don't have that size of canvas so I gotta go and grab the canvas so that I can go ahead and transfer the.
Speaker 1:Is it the big, big, big one?
Speaker 2:It's the same size as the one we got last time for my Mars Attacks painting.
Speaker 1:Oh, it's not the big one that will never fit in nobody's car.
Speaker 2:I wouldn't even know what to put on one of those things for real, like I would love to have one, but I'm like okay, but if this is this big, it's going to take up a whole wall.
Speaker 1:It better be something. Badass, penis. What the for?
Speaker 2:your place, sure, uh, for your place. Can you imagine? Can you imagine walking in? And because you have all that wall space, you have a canvas that literally takes up the entire wall and it's just penis penis, yeah penis right when you walk in penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis those other two dudes that are there.
Speaker 1:They're not gonna be like what is this, what's this, what's this? And then you picture at the end no, sir, we already discussed this.
Speaker 2:We already discussed this.
Speaker 1:I'm gonna put you at the end of the tip.
Speaker 2:No, just coming out oh my god, please don't. We already had this discussion, sir. Multiple times, multiple times. Once here, once with Javier.
Speaker 1:No, I haven't gotten the magazine yet, so you haven't given it to me yet.
Speaker 2:Wonderful. Thank you for the reminder that you will not get that magazine now.
Speaker 1:You know what? That's fine, I'll just print it off of fucking Facebook. And you know what? I will fucking print it out a nice big frame. Better, not I? So fucking, am you better not? And I'm gonna put it. Put a splash of white oh at the end of the you know what you know, what you know what.
Speaker 2:Go ahead. It's cool. It's better than putting my my picture in the damn bathroom and see.
Speaker 1:So I knew you would see a silver lining. Yeah, by all means I'm gonna. I'm gonna make people so uncomfortable in my dungeon because you're gonna be in there what the friend, no, sir, no, that is. That is really every, every person's gonna be looking at you just smiling be like why is there a girl in here in the first? Place. Why is?
Speaker 2:she smiling like that? Why is there a picture of a girl in here?
Speaker 1:Why is your bestie in here Awkward? She's a voyeur.
Speaker 2:So my picture's in there. That makes no sense at all.
Speaker 1:Her eyes actually have camera lenses in there, so give your best performance.
Speaker 2:That is so not awkward at all, at all.
Speaker 1:Hey, it's a great crafty idea. I mean, put your best friend Hashtag, put your best friend in an awkward position. If you ain't best friend, you ain't doing it. Yeah, yeah, right, ticker right because that's not weird at all. No, it's not. I know know so demanding bless you uh see, you know, I would love.
Speaker 1:Um, I'm trying to get more into sewing because I realize how much clothing now these days do not fit me at all. So even when it comes to being around the neck area, it's very hard. I either have to go a size bigger, and the size bigger is way too big for me, and if I go a size smaller, well, it's too small and it's choking me. So I think this is why people are like oh, you should get yourself custom made. Yes, you're right, I should uh that's gonna cost a pretty penny because, clothes as it is isn't expensive yeah, no joke.
Speaker 1:If I had all the money in the world right now, I'd be at joe and fabric buying going just give me everything. I would be literally just with baskets full, because they had this thing where you can only get two yards of everything that's really.
Speaker 2:Oh, because they're closing.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they're closing, why yeah, I would have done that and then I would have had like 10 people with me. Everyone gets 10, two yards each, please. So just like, can you just leave all that there? They're all going to get the same thing, and we're just gonna check out check out that's crazy though I would fucking clear out that's still hard.
Speaker 1:Yeah, only two yards. But I had got the dallas cowboy um yeah, fabric. So I was like you know what those will make? Cute little pillows. I want to kind of learn how to sew um sequences on things too as well, so that's something I kind of want to learn too as well. So I want to see how that's going to be, because that looks like a lot of fun to actually do. It looks like a pain in the ass it really does but it looks like fun to kind of put the sequences.
Speaker 2:It's time consuming Very, but it can also be therapeutic, although we know how you are when it comes to hobbies that take a while.
Speaker 1:Okay. So look, I tried my hands in knitting. That just made me pissy. I was so pissed off with it. And jewelry making, jewelry making, that was a.
Speaker 2:And chain mailing.
Speaker 1:That pissed me off too.
Speaker 2:Anything else we should add. Leather crafting.
Speaker 1:Actually, no, I do like leather crafting. That's actually a lot of fun. I just need to understand it just a little bit better, because you can't make things out of stuff like that. So, um, leather crafting I actually do like. I just don't know how to play with leather. So I'm trying to do the whole sewing first so I can just go into the next phase, which would be leather, so I can understand, uh, the fabric and the um and the uh, the animal skin, which would be the cow, high, raw high, to be able to figure out what, how to use it properly. So I'm watching a whole lot of youtube videos. Right now I gotta watch a youtube video on how to fucking use my sewing machine.
Speaker 2:So yeah, I wouldn't know nothing about that yeah, because you don't. Don't ever let me touch your sewing machine, don't ever let me touch sewing machine guys, they do not like, not like me, they do not like me. I want to learn them and I have tried and people have trusted me with them and I have broken every single one I've touched.
Speaker 1:I will get you a new one, so you can't break it.
Speaker 2:Give me like the $30 kitty one, so if it breaks, it's not that I'm going to get you the one they used to have.
Speaker 1:That's going-. There you go, the handheld stupid.
Speaker 2:I'll take it because if it breaks it's not a loss. I hate for somebody to buy a machine or give me a machine and they're like oh, here you can have this and I'm like I'm gonna break it.
Speaker 1:I know I'm gonna break it I want to learn uh embroidery, because that looks like a lot of fun, but that's an expensive hobby yeah, it is, my aunt did that for the folklorego dresses bro yeah, don't get me wrong.
Speaker 2:It looks gorgeous and I'm just sitting there like holy shit, but yeah, I couldn't, I can't.
Speaker 1:I can do a lot of things, but there are certain things. It's a lot of work.
Speaker 2:It's a lot of fucking work. Dude, I blame you, I can't. I can do a lot of things, but there are certain things that I'm just like nope, it's a lot of work.
Speaker 1:It's a lot of fucking work, dude. I think one thing that I'm actually finding fun to do is the t-shirts out of the to make pillows. I think, that's been a lot of fun and I thoroughly have enjoyed cutting the shirts up, measuring them a bit doing math, you measuring them a bit doing math, you know, oh, yeah, yeah, you know, because I do know math, I just hate it.
Speaker 2:But I totally thought you wouldn't need it anywhere.
Speaker 1:I never said we didn't. I just said I just hate using it because I don't like it in this fucking form of a sentence. It's just stupid.
Speaker 2:If Jesse has 250 shirts. Look here, and he sorts out 180, but cuts only 50. Just kidding, how many pillows can Jesse make out of the ones he hasn't touched? One One, una mas.
Speaker 1:That's funny. One, una, mas, una mas that's funny cause you can only make one hello, is this thing on?
Speaker 2:oh my god can anybody hear us?
Speaker 1:is anybody tuning in? 7 people are for sure no, we have 22 now oh my bad we have 22 now 22 people are now, but we have 22 followers. We have over 2500 listeners. That's insane and that's just off of spotify and that's just off of spotify. Thank you for listening. No, we appreciate you, we appreciate. So, yeah, let's keep it going. We must be doing something fucking right, because they're listening to two big backs with heavy breathing and nasally nose.
Speaker 2:You know what we just ate? Okay, which was delicious, by the way.
Speaker 1:Oh, thank you.
Speaker 2:Bestie here made a spaghetti.
Speaker 1:It wasn't even spaghetti, though. It was fettuccine with red sauce.
Speaker 2:Okay, you're right, he made some red sauce fettuccine. Pretty much Still delicious.
Speaker 1:The Italians would hate me right now for doing that. Yes, they might, they might.
Speaker 2:Yeah, if you're listening in, it'd be like disgraceful.
Speaker 1:I know I just didn't Look disgraceful. I know I just didn't look. I'm a bitch on a budget. I, you could have made it yourself, yes, but eggs are expensive too, therefore pasta is expensive which is crazy because pasta is so cheap it is, it is, and you know what? I'm actually quite surprised. I only needed the one bag.
Speaker 2:I didn't, I didn't have to go overboard one bag one bag you usually would make more than one bag like two bags that is insane yeah, well, okay, it was leftovers right, I was gonna say I would do that, but in the old house that I lived in because it was for a whole family bitch, we're big bags we go for seconds like, but this was actually pretty good for us three, so it's actually not too bad.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it was just enough. Yeah, it was just enough for us to get seconds in. I wish we had more garlic bread, because that shit was fucking hard Garlic bread's always delicious, especially the ones that eat that one with cheese. Oh, so good yeah.
Speaker 1:So good, oh, especially when you put like pesto on it.
Speaker 2:Dude, when you put pepperoni and a little bit of marinara in it, yeah and then you.
Speaker 1:but if you cut it in, half and flip it on each other. So it makes the sandwich.
Speaker 2:See, that's the main thing about like put that shit in a panini press.
Speaker 1:Oh, bitch, why did you do it like that?
Speaker 2:because that's how I would do the panini press yeah, that's how I do fisting too.
Speaker 1:You did the same thing. I was like I want to do this, I'm just. Why did you do it like that?
Speaker 2:Because I'm short and I can't like, I'm not tall enough to push down on it. It was on the counter, so I'd just grab it and I'd put all my weight on it, on the handle.
Speaker 1:She's over here putting her arm in a 45, no 90 degree angle and going up and down and going choo-choo, it's the same thing, is that what you guys do? Yeah, go choo-choo.
Speaker 2:You choo-choo of the choo-choo. With the choo-choo song in the background, that is horrible.
Speaker 1:You think I'm joking, or not?
Speaker 2:I know you're not joking.
Speaker 1:Except we don't hear the song we hear oh, oh, oh. You don't even hear the music Maybe it's your first time. It's like oh, oh my.
Speaker 2:God, that's hilarious. People are going to be like we don't want to listen to your kinky stories, fuck y'all. 1,200 people, 1,500, 2,700 people want to Like how you kept changing the numbers.
Speaker 1:I'm trying to remember the number I said I know. That's why I said I like how you kept changing and trying to remember. And then we have the 22 followers who are following us. I don't know about all the other platforms on who's following us, I just know about Spotify. I haven't jumped on, okay, uh, that I think. Overall we probably have about 150 followers which is not too bad and overall. So there's some people that like to listen to our shenanigans uh, you know, I think we're getting a lot of attractions from overseas.
Speaker 2:This is really fucking awesome that's crazy to me, like I know, like it's not a normal thing, but for me I'm just kind of like I told I talked about it last, did I talk about it?
Speaker 1:or I just told you behind I think, just I think we told we talked about it after recording. Yeah, okay, yeah we'll talk about it. We'll have another podcast to talk about, because I think it'll be a lot of fun. It'd be fun to do another uh update for everybody. So because we haven't done that in a good minute, we we haven't done an update podcast.
Speaker 2:You're right we could do. We checked the numbers, but we haven't shared it with you guys.
Speaker 1:We can do an update podcast.
Speaker 2:Cool, yeah, that sounds like a plan.
Speaker 1:Shenanigans La, la, la, la la.
Speaker 2:Which is only a couple days away.
Speaker 1:You know I, like Styler's, want the fucking big ass wreath. Let me get our first house.
Speaker 2:I was going to say it needs to fit.
Speaker 1:Well, I'll make it fit. With enough lubrication, I will make it fit.
Speaker 2:You know what I meant.
Speaker 1:I know what you meant. It's just hard to put a wreath outside your front door without someone trying to fucking steal it.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:I can't.
Speaker 2:Felt.
Speaker 1:So I'm just like, I just don't want to. I do like it better indoors and I do like it outdoors, because when you come in and when you close the door, it just't want to. I do like it better indoors and I do like it outdoors, because when you come in and when you close the door, it just bam, yeah, breathe. You know what I mean. I love it. I love it. I don't think he's made me a. Yeah, he did make me a Christmas one. It was the vampire teddy. Yeah, and he made me the Halloween one. So I want to commission him more for valentine's day, easter and fiesta awesome.
Speaker 2:Yeah, did you see?
Speaker 1:this his fiesta one I saw the fiesta, one cool fucking I know he showed me he's like.
Speaker 2:I saw that I was like whoa same and I was like oh bro so pretty he's done he's.
Speaker 1:His fucking craft is fucking amazing yeah, it really is.
Speaker 2:Yeah, he has gorgeous pieces.
Speaker 1:Mm-hmm, I know, and people are like what's your talent? I'm like normally sucking dick, but you have to go to my other page for that.
Speaker 2:That's one of the spicy talents that I'm very limited at showing off.
Speaker 1:That's your you have to go follow my blue sky. It's Putt Mongeon, go follow them. It's no, this guy, it's a putt mangin. Go follow them. Uh, it's uh. No, my talent's actually I.
Speaker 1:I do a lot of good crafting, but a lot of it stems from, like, witchery stuff. I haven't touched none of my witch stuff at all whatsoever. It's been a good minute, because I've I haven't paid enough tensions to it, and I probably should, because a lot of shit's going down that needs my full on attention though. But I'm starting to realize those cards are starting to fucking make sense, and I probably should, because a lot of shit's going down that needs my full-on attention though. But I'm starting to realize those cards are starting to fucking make sense as I go along, because I am struggling a little bit here and there when it comes to certain things.
Speaker 1:But my crafting I can sew. I really can, because I remember when I was sixth grade it was theater we would make little puppets and all, all the puppets I would fucking make and I used to. We hand stitched every single, and I remember hand stitching every single thing. I liked it because it was very therapeutical for me to do. I don't know why that was, but I never. I never picked it back up again. You know we, uh, that was something I actually liked doing was the puppets.
Speaker 2:The puppets were really fucking fun, so, uh, I wish I got to hem a blanket one time with the thicker thread that's used for embroidery yeah I got to hem the oh, the giant tortilla blanket that we made for my nephew before the tortilla blankets were a thing oh, no shit I thought it was hell.
Speaker 2:I mean, james was like a little like pissed off because he was like dude, we should make these and I'm like we totally should make these. And then maybe like two years down the road, that's when they all started popping up and being popular and I'm like, oh, guess what, he's like what. And I showed him and he's like what. I was like you should have jumped on it when you had the chance, dude.
Speaker 2:Like yeah kind of stuff. But anyways, he showed me how to airbrush. We did this little burn spots in the toes or whatever. And then I took the rest of the blanket home once it was dry so that I can hem the entire freaking round, which was nice Because, like I said, I'm not a sewer, but I learned a particular kind of stitch specifically for closing that blanket.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:And it was therapeutic. Like I sat and I remember I would get myself some pan dulce and a cup of coffee because it's late at night and I put on my music or whatever, and I'm just there all night listening to music and sewing the hem of that.
Speaker 1:I like it because I'm just like dude. The amount of outfits that I can fucking make for myself if I can learn how to do it, it would be fucking phenomenal, Because I have a lot of the patterns that I really want to work on.
Speaker 1:But I just want to make stuff for me and maybe for Hubby too as well, though, but I want to make my own dressy shirts because I'm getting tired of like I can wear a tie, but I don't wear ties. Ties because I have and I know this is a me issue um, back when I was younger, um, the guy had put I couldn't do it a lot of the stuff when I was s8 because I was choked, so I don't like wearing nothing close constricting constricting me at all period.
Speaker 1:So uh, could never do that, even to this day. Like if I get a necklace that's way bigger than me, I'm just like, oh no yeah no, no, no, no, no.
Speaker 1:but the main, uh, prevalence of it all is that I just want to be able to kind of make something comfortable for me that fits my body type, because I'm, there's a big, there's a big dude that works with us, that I work, that I work with and he's a manager and he's, he has, um, a button-up shirt and you can tell it's not meant for him because the collar is so huge. It just looks, it looks funny. He has a small head with the zbd collar around his neck, his neck. It doesn't look flattering at all, in the slightest. So I'm just like that, just kind of gave me a light bulb, like I just want to make a sweatshirt for you. Please let me do it. You don't even have to pay me, just tell me what you want and if I can make something, fuck. Yeah, dude, but one of the main things I need to get that I want to get is a mannequin, so I can lease him a lot of the stuff and whatnot.
Speaker 1:And I found well, I didn't find I stole uh somebody's uh measurements and how to measure something and I printed it out so I can go and measure everything the way it's supposed to and then just kind of make everything nice. I'm just like, oh okay, I gave one to a uh ab to the roommate as well, because I know he does his own little shit here.
Speaker 2:I was like here.
Speaker 1:Um he goes what's this? I was like it's a measurement. So if you're doing cosplay or whatnot, this will tell you exactly what your measurements are and it kind of breaks it all down for you what you need to on that.
Speaker 2:So he was like oh, that kind of sounds like a pepakira file. Yeah, we had to have a whole converter for that thing too. If you wanted to scale a piece for your costume, you had to use this specific formula to get it right so that when you printed it out and you put the pieces together before the fiberglass, it would actually fit you yeah because I think, I think I printed out a Loki helmet, but because I calculated the way I calculated it, even when I was putting it together I realized like it's not going to be wearable.
Speaker 1:Unfortunately.
Speaker 2:I wanted it to be wearable because I'm like I will put this on. This is the coolest, I love Loki, but I can't. I mean, I would still do it, just to have it on my shelf. But, in all honesty, in the move it's probably been destroyed. I have no idea where it's at.
Speaker 1:I want to wear it's still in paper form. When you said that I want to go get a body suit, a shapewear, I want to put one on.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:To help me shape my body just a little bit when I work out, so I want to see how it feels, because it looks pretty fucking cool and I want to like, I want to get rid of my gut, so. But I'm trying to lose the weight, though, but I don't have anything constricting me to help me maintain what I eat, so I'm wondering if that would actually help out, because you're wearing loose clothes, right?
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:So when you're naturally eating, you're pretty much comfy, right. Yes, so eating you're pretty much comfy, right. So those who eat of what I from what I hear, those who wear the fajas and everything and whatnot and that they have to like small eat because then it pushes out on their stomach so much- it will, but I don't think it necessarily controls your eating habits as much as it trains your body to distribute its sizes or its curves in different areas.
Speaker 2:That's what its main thing is supposed to do.
Speaker 1:And that's what it does.
Speaker 2:That's what race trainers are for. They literally constrict just the waist area, so you learn to breathe laterally rather than outwardly. Yeah, because it's holding it together in a way where it's distributing everything gradually. That takes time, it's not a quick anything, but it starts to distribute your body in different places because of conformity. That's what it is. So if you're wearing it super tight, yeah, you're probably going to restrict yourself from eating, because it's already restricting you from even breathing in the first place, oh shit.
Speaker 2:There are some where, if you put them too tight, you will pass out.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, no, Because you know, I want to go to a place where I can kind of learn how to like pick one out that works for me and kind of just slowly work my body on there, because when I work out or when I'm sitting down I kind of need something to kind of help constrict a lot of this stuff and maybe help out with my posture, because what I hear, they that's what they do, right, they do, they help you with your posture and they're going to help you shape.
Speaker 2:but you have to do the part of the eliminating the body part, the like, if it's the gut area, if it's the hips, if it's the chest, whatever, you still have to do your part with working out, because you can't just target and I know there's so much shit out there that's like, oh, get rid of just your arms, get rid of just your gut, no, no, no that I already know None of that.
Speaker 1:No, because working out works out everything Exactly. There's no such thing as targeting.
Speaker 2:Yes, and when you lose weight, you lose it everywhere. Your body's going to lose it wherever it's meant to.
Speaker 1:You can't just target one place. I think that would be great because even if I wanted to work out or work at whatnot, it's going to keep a lot of the postures, especially when it comes to like squatting, sitting, all of that stuff. But it also will help out the breathing techniques just a little bit better, because I recorded something on TikTok, because I love making my little eggs on the little cupcakes, silicones that I have so much fun. I do love that. It's so much better than boiling fucking eggs. By the way, um, if you haven't got a chance to do it, do it. If you haven't seen my tiktoks, go check out my tiktok, since it's on there. So I have the little silicone eggs and everything and I put them in there and whatnot. Um, I was listening to myself and I was listening to myself on the podcast and I'm just like I'm like, oh shit, is that me? Yeah, that's wow, yeah, wow. But I'm not insecure about my breathing or anything like that. It's just it's so funny because every time I'm talking or this is what happens.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I notice that when I send voice messages to people and I hear I listen back to them or whatever.
Speaker 1:I'm just like You're so winded.
Speaker 2:I do, but my thing is I talk 50 miles an hour when I get really into something. Same dude I would just go off and off and off and then I catch my. I'm like, oh, why am I reading like that? Because I'm talking to 100 miles an hour. Yeah that's why I'm like stop and I'm like I can't, I can't, I can't do it but I wanted I have this envision.
Speaker 1:Because I this envision? Because I want to learn how to create and craft the fahas, how do they do it and whatnot. It would be fucking nice to see it, that's metal work, sir.
Speaker 1:It is metal work. But then again, like I said, I'm just someone who wants to kind of learn new skills, right, because I want to keep my brain keep going and keep being to where it needs to be. I want to shape up my body because I want to wear a full body suit that complements me the way I want it to be complimented, kind of like how jennifer lopez wears the full fucking body suits and everything and whatnot, kind of like something like that, but for more of a masculine figure, for what I, what I want. So it's just kind of like I'm I'm always 100, always in the zone when it comes to creating, uh, trying to create new things I can't create, like crochets of a fucking devil or whatnot.
Speaker 1:But it did make me think about the patterns of the hood, the pup hoods, because I was looking at it and I'm just like I bet I can make my own pup hood. I just need to know the materials that they're using. I know one of the things that the pup hoods they use is what scuba divers wear.
Speaker 2:Yeah, the neoprene, the neoprene yes.
Speaker 1:Which is great because neoprene. I think it's really cheap, depending on where you're getting it. I think. I probably would have to get it overseas?
Speaker 2:That's a good question.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I don't know how much it is, but I want to get it because I do want to create my own pup hood that suits me a little bit better, instead of going, okay, large, extra large and whatnot. Because anytime I wear my pup hood the eyes are not exactly symmetrical to my face, to where it needs to be. So I need to make a neoprene hood that is very symmetrical to who I am as a person when it comes down to my hood, and I can get, if I can get the math down right, look me doing math if I can get the, the, the symmetrical part portion of my face, of what it is, then I can get the neoprene and how I want to print it out, just to fit my face. Just fine, right, you know, yeah, and I want to be able to make the holes a little bit better on the ear so I can hear better, because it's only three holes yeah, like yeah that's.
Speaker 2:I thought that was kind of weird, but yeah three holes.
Speaker 1:I'm just like, um, I wonder if I can make it a little bit better. So if I can find a way to tweak it just a little bit better, I'd be fucking okay. But I wonder if the three holes are an accidental thing, because if you put too many, they're just going to stretch and then each one of them is going to intertwine or they're gonna, or it's gonna, start to rip yeah, in between, because they're so thinned out.
Speaker 1:Next, uh hole between the holes right so I'm kind of figuring what would it be like, how would be the math, to be able to put each hole individually apart, so it doesn't yeah I was gonna say all you got to do is measure the distance between each hole and then the holes, the extra holes that you create, need to be that same distance away from those three holes.
Speaker 1:I think, yeah, but I also need the holes you need, and that's it yeah, I do need the holes to be exactly on my ears, because these holes they're not exactly on my canal of my ear, so they're a little bit up, like right above the ear, like right here on the tip.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:So it's hard to actually hear. So when I'm doing either a hard scene or hard play and I'm wearing the hood, I can't hear anything. So I have to rely on my boy to be able to do it. But we'll talk about that on Freaky Fridays because it'd be fun. It'll be a lot of fun to actually talk about. But I want to be able to craft my own things. I'm already at 37 years old. I'm just thinking man, how cool would it be to be able to craft my own stuff. And I haven't. I've always wanted to cosplay a lot and I a lot, and I'm just like it's so cool to be able to cosplay.
Speaker 1:I just don't have cosplay money. Yeah, but if I can create the things that I have, then I can make a word that suits me the most and I don't have to worry about it at all, I just make it for me. But I also wanted to get into the fashion line and be able to kind of make my own thing, and me wanting to do fashion, what?
Speaker 2:I know people freak out when I tell them oh yeah, I have like a three inch binder full of fashion designs and they're like but you're just like, I'm just a t-shirt and jeans. Girls, like I know I know, I know and they're like, but you design, I did, it's all still there, it's all still there I actually had a friend who offered to talk to somebody that they knew who made clothes and asked if they just uh, they reached out to them to ask them if they still did uh-huh and that way they would start making my designs oh nice yeah, and create this whole you know middleman thing where my stuff would actually be sold in their little boutique thing or whatever.
Speaker 1:Unfortunately the lady had retired from sewing so yeah I was like boo I kind of want to get into sewing, because these hands are starting to get a little the dude, I dread that yeah, I dread it only because these are my tools these
Speaker 1:so I use a lot of these times and it's not. It's uh, martial artists breaking boards, breaking wood. They're starting to hurt a lot, so they do get cramps. I think you've seen my hand cramp up before you told me about it, but I've never you've never seen it. Oh bitch, that shit fucking hurts. It's like one's cramping this way and this one's here, and it's just like all of them are just like right here and I have to wait. It's kind of like pulling a charlie horse in the back of your leg.
Speaker 2:This shit I remember my grandmother used to get, but it was usually her thumb. It would get stuck inwards and she's just like like.
Speaker 2:It looked like it really was really hard for her to try to just pull it out no, you have to massage like the, you have to like massage the finger and you have to take like big, deep, fat breaths, because, man, that shit would fucking hurt people, would just say getting like arthritis or carpal tunnel because I do so much shit with my hand the piano, the playing, the piano I was always afraid like just please don't ever get carpal tunnel I mean I wonder if everything is stems for something else, because I'm just like I need to sue somebody for it, because I noticed, um, when I open water bottles uh-huh, just a regular water bottle this finger it starts.
Speaker 2:It starts to hurt and I'm like it's always the right thing I can know I can open some things that some dudes can't, and all of a sudden a water bottle is hurting my finger.
Speaker 1:I'm like please don't, please don't start with this finger like my fingers are starting to hurt just thinking about it. I'm just like I know I'm like dude, did I injure myself?
Speaker 2:I just injured myself, right, like why does it hurt, like that. And I'm like, oh, please don't start, please don't start.
Speaker 1:But that comes with old age, because I don't think there's a medicine or anything for Carpotan and I do have to like squeeze a stretch ball.
Speaker 2:You can take inflammatories just to kind of like slow the process down as much as possible, much as possible. But the inflammatories that I have I was afraid to take because they come with a high risk of um heart disease. Like they up the risk a lot and I'm like and I'm like, yeah, let's not do that, because my family history is heart issues I'm like yeah, let's not do that yeah, but I'm just like, just like heart issues, arthritis, heart issues, arthritis Diabetes is in there somewhere.
Speaker 1:I'll take the arthritis. I do need to slow down on the sugar because my sugar levels have been like doctors are like you're borderline diabetic and you're pushing it. I'm just like fuck. I think that's why I kind of stopped on the sodas a bit. That those dr peppers the first time I opened them and hubby got them from a while.
Speaker 2:So yeah, I was gonna say I drank it and it.
Speaker 1:Just I'm gonna say I'm telling you it doesn't taste the same I may just very weird, I hate to say it, but I may just have to go to the the zeros after for a while period like I love what you say, like I hate to say it, I'm like, I'm just not a big diet person. I'm just, I'm just not.
Speaker 2:I don't like I just think it's funny because, like you say, you're like I have to like.
Speaker 1:It's such a it really is for you to go from regular to diet or to zero or to whatever it's just gonna suck period, because I know that after eating these peeps and whatnot candies, chocolate, desserts I think this is why when I was, uh, when I was living, I just said no more sweets in the house because it forced me to. I, if I wanted something, I'm either going to have to go out and I don't feel like going anywhere and I don't have anything sweet, so I need to figure out the fruits and all of that stuff was my way of coping with the sweetness and whatnot. And I was doing very well because in wrestling I did, I didn't have sweets for like almost six years.
Speaker 2:I'm just like, ooh, I can't, that's just I don't think I can do not having sweet. I'm fine with the Coke. Like I said, I went two years with zero Cokes not a single drop and on the off chance that I did like, my nieces and nephews would have something like can I taste it? Or they would even know they'd be like hey, do you want to taste it before I start? I'm just like, yeah, I'll taste it. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:And I'm just like it was just reminders of like, why the hell am I drinking it? But you get addicted.
Speaker 1:It's the yeah, so I'm trying to also cut back on the carbs, because a lot of my cholesterol and high cholesterol carbs are coming from the carbs too, and the sugars too as well diabetes, but I'm just like fuck yeah, I'm like damn, I just bought like a shit ton of pack of fucking ramen noodles to ease like a lot of my appetite, because I'm just like it's becoming a fucking ramen noodle budget lately and I don't like a ramen noodle budget.
Speaker 1:It's killing me, yeah, but I'm trying my best on there. So, um, it's just like shit. I don't. I don't honestly don't know. Yeah, I hate it. It's you. It's just like shit, I honestly don't know.
Speaker 2:I hate it. You're going to have to train yourself to just learn how to eat less and be more satisfied with things that aren't carbs. That's the shitty part.
Speaker 1:Well, it's kind of hard because you and I we hang out, we love pizza and if I had to cut back on pizza a lot to not be able to have it no more, because that's my true weakness, and the macaroni cheese and the fucking ramen noodles, like that's why I ate a lot of, like a lot of these uh chicken. I did a lot of the uh salads and everything and I would cook it, I was bake it and I would be able to do all of that stuff and whatnot. And I can still do it. I know I can, but it's like everything has become so expensive and it gives me such such a high anxiety because if I go, if I go buy fruit and vegetables, they're only good for a week.
Speaker 2:Yep, you know some things you can freeze, still, you know I'm gonna say so you get frozen or you freeze them yeah, so if you freeze them, you got to blanch certain ones, and then you have to blanch them at different degrees and varying whatever, and I'm just just like, yeah, that's too much work bro.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so I would make smoothies. I would make fruit smoothies all the time and I would put like I would buy the almond milk vanilla, because when you're crafting a drink for myself, just in case we're not going off a subject here, all of this is about crafting. Still crafting meals man, yeah, still crafting meals. So I used to do meal preps a lot and I hated it. I hate fucking meal preps and the reason I say I hate meal preps I hate leftovers, I really do, you do I hate leftovers and some there's some leftovers.
Speaker 1:I can do like I was doing the um uh the fideo, because I haven't had for the own forever. It had the fucking, the gizzards in there. I'm just like, oh, so good. Uh, because I had the fideo in there and it was really good and I had made a lot of it with the chicken and everything. I was gonna eat that for a while, never touched it. It stayed in the fucking fridge for almost four weeks and I just tossed it out the other day. I'm just like you know what?
Speaker 2:I don't mind meal prepping, I don't mind eating the same things day after day after day, but the one meat that I do not like meal prepped or to eat afterwards, is chicken chicken.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it gets a weird ass taste and I, because you've already cooked it to a nice tender temperature Once you reheat it again.
Speaker 2:It tastes funky.
Speaker 1:It's more rubbery, because you, now you, I don't, it's not, it's a funky taste, because it's a. It's a rubbery, funky taste. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:I don't mind the texture, I don't mind if it gets dried out.
Speaker 1:I do Rub, I don't mind the texture, I don't mind if it gets dried out, or rubbery or chewy.
Speaker 2:My thing is the flavor. Okay, when you eat a piece of chicken that is near the bone, especially if the marrow seeps out and there's the maroon or the red that taste the gamey chicken, the chicken gamey taste I don't like it. I know that's so, like bougie, but I don't like it right. And I noticed even when you cook. I think the only the only one that doesn't do it is chicken breast, but not necessarily all the time right but when you cook it it's gravy, but when you reheat it it gets that taste, even if it was boneless.
Speaker 2:And I'm like why does it taste like this? It's so gross. It doesn't matter how much seasoning I put in my damn meal prep, you can taste it.
Speaker 1:Same thing with meat Meat when you first cook it. I can't.
Speaker 2:I don't have an issue with red meat, it's only the chicken.
Speaker 1:No, I have an issue and pork oh, pork yeah. Reheated pork no, pork and chicken go hand in hand on that. Even with red meat, if I put it back in the microwave to boom it or to nuke it, and I get it out, it doesn't have the same consistency. I think it's because I've already.
Speaker 2:Well, I don't like anything.
Speaker 1:Well, no, it's like. That's why I kind of hate leftovers, because I like things fresh. I love fresh food, fresh meat. I think that's why I go out to eat a lot when I'm at work is because I like a fresh fucking meal. Yeah, when I'm at work is because I like a fresh fucking meal.
Speaker 1:So if I meal prep and I got to throw it in the fucking microwave, I'm just like this is just going to be a fucking waste because I'm not going to enjoy it the way I want to. So if I'm going to meal prep for lunch for work, I would have to do a salad, a cold salad, but I would make sure that it's very filling and it would consist of the chicken, because I can do leftover chicken that's cold because I'm already shredding it. It has the seasoning that I need in there Because it's cold and it's cold. So I can just do it like that, yep, and that's fucking perfect, because I can season a fucking cold chicken. Yeah, meat. On the other hand, I can't do Like red meats and everything I can't do cold.
Speaker 2:I used to do uh pizza cold, but not anymore, but now it's just kind of like pizza anyway. So I did learn how to make fathead pizza. So when I was doing the keto I didn't have any kind of carbs in my pizza you know my favorite cardio, uh, keto meal was for pizza with a piece of casserole oh yeah, that's it. Yeah, because it's just, it's just it's just nothing but toppings.
Speaker 1:That's it, and I'm okay with that.
Speaker 2:I like the fat head, though I don't know why I liked. I like the almond yeah, I like a fat head too because that's a bit not that kind of oh my god that, save that for freaky friday, dear lord, talking about the damn fathead pizza fool hey, so am I, so am I, so am I.
Speaker 1:I like a good Italian. You walked into that one, I did, I did. You know what the?
Speaker 2:only reason I made the fathead pizza is because one day I was able to get a red mill uh, almond flour but the grainy kind, and that was my favorite, I learned how to make my own bread slices that weren't actually bread, because it was almond and egg, um.
Speaker 2:And then I made the fathead pizza with that, and I don't remember where I got it or what, but I was just like it was cheap and I was like hell yeah. And then when I went back to go actually buy some, that thing is like $20 for one pound and I'm like, yeah, I'm never having that again.
Speaker 1:Yep and yeah, you know, joke I. I probably can do a lot of gluten-free stuff. But if I'm gonna do gluten-free I'm gonna make it from scratch. Only reasons because gluten-free to buy anything gluten-free. I'm going to make it from scratch. Only reason is because gluten-free to buy anything gluten-free it's expensive. I rather buy the flour. It may be a little bit expensive to buy the flour, but I can make a shit ton of things with it.
Speaker 1:You know what I mean. So I have the ability, the capability to be able to do that, but it's just being able to craft that.
Speaker 2:I have all the fucking cookbooks and recipes that I need here to do whatever the fuck I want. Yeah, it's affording the actual ingredient.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I can't tell you how many times I bought the fucking ingredients. I'm like, yeah, we're gonna make something. Oh, by the way, you got this, this, this, this. Oh man, I gotta fine fine fine I hate it. I remember the french bread I made and that was fucking delicious. I was actually quite impressed. I made that by scratch.
Speaker 2:I'm like, okay, now I try making tortillas from scratch and lord no I think I've only done that like maybe a handful of times, but it was when I was way younger. So, in all honesty, if somebody asked me to make tortillas here and now from scratch, I'd be like I don't remember.
Speaker 1:Bro, I don't, I really don't my grandma gave me her recipe for her uh bonnet potable. I couldn't. I want to craft her bonnet potable so fucking much because I do like it. I just don't have the time or the patience to do it. I just don't, I don't. I love cooking in the kitchen. I, I would love to bake. I'm remember taking uh uh home ec in high school.
Speaker 1:That was a lot of fun I never got to take home ec no I've always wanted to take wood shot because I've always wanted to learn how to make do the wood yeah, my friends dang, I think I got my friends took home ec.
Speaker 2:I never took it. I I don't know why, but I because you were a natural editor. I was gonna say like I did it all day, every day, at home. So the hell was I supposed to learn. I mean, I should have taken it because it would have been an easy credit, but still I think when I'm making in the kitchen I would love to make.
Speaker 1:My favorite thing to craft the most is fucking hamburger meat. I'm a big sucker for hamburger meat. I love a good fucking burger. I just need my burger to be fucking. I need the meat.
Speaker 2:The actual patty to be seasoned, because nobody fucking seasons their patties anymore. I can't cook a burger that isn't.
Speaker 1:I don't know, I don't know, I don't know. I will say even burger boy, if you just eat the patty by itself, there's no seasoning, there's none. It's just what people are tending to doing is that it's, it's juicy, so they. What they're doing is basically the, the, the meat to fat ratio on it. So the juicier the burger, the better, and it's very lightening seasoning. But because their stuff already comes in already um, already has all the um preservatives already in it and that's what makes it the juicy flavor. But when you go into these places like babes and all that stuff, they probably do make it from scratch they're missing flavor in the meat. But because the meat doesn't hold a lot of the flavor in it these places like babes and all that stuff, they probably do make it from scratch.
Speaker 2:They're missing flavor in the meat, but because the meat doesn't hold a lot of the flavor in it and sometimes you're missing a lot of it true, and also there's not a lot of flavors that people can use for matt for the public yeah, because of food allergies, exactly food allergies so, even even if they wanted to, they're very limited, yeah, they're very limited, on what they can and can't season their shit with Because you got to put a fucking warning label of food allergies for everybody and that's where the condiments and everything come in, because you hand the people here.
Speaker 1:Make it as good as you want it to be See one of the main things I learned that with to put in your meat is onion. If you put chopped, diced onion and you throw it in your meats and then you just cook it because of the glaze of the onion, the worcestershire, the um, the egg, uh, we put a little bit of egg, I put a little bit of egg in there everybody.
Speaker 1:That way it's stick, yeah it can stick, so, but in order for me to better yeah, in order for me to get nuts, make sure it's not so sticky, right, I do put a little bit of crackers, yeah.
Speaker 2:I will blend the crackers. If you put an egg, you have to put some kind of crackers or toast or breadcrumbs or something, because that's what makes it stick together.
Speaker 1:It makes the patty stay a patty and not fall apart. No one does that. Oh, of course not.
Speaker 2:Because it's meat, because if they put crackers or breadcrumbs or whatever, then it can't be safe for some people's consumption, because, again, the whole gluten thing.
Speaker 1:You know, I don't know If I ever had a burger joint or a restaurant, I would have to put that Because gluten, like food allergies, I get that people want to be catered to all of that. I don't know if I'm somebody who would cater to that. I would just let people know like, hey, we have, we make our shit scratch from scratch and if you have a gluten allergy, if you have this allergy, this, this, and I get that. I'm going to be very limited to what customer retail, which is fine, because then the ones who are coming in who want a good burger can have it. But if I can try to recreate that without having the allergies, then I can do it on a separate grill for somebody else so it doesn't cross contaminate at all whatsoever. So it's kind of like.
Speaker 1:This is why I'm kind of playing with my burgers a little bit, because I want to make sure, okay, if I'm doing this and have food allergies for this particular person, what could I add in there that people are not going to like? If it's onion that people can't have, how can I make another burger that doesn't have any onions in it? How can I make one with the garlic, or how can I do one like oh, we'll just use seasonal, but seasonal has everything.
Speaker 2:So it's like I mean, it depends. Like I said, you can't cater to everybody.
Speaker 1:You can. That's just kind of the hard thing though.
Speaker 2:But at the same time you have to make it for everybody to be able to consume safely.
Speaker 1:Exactly so. I think that's why they put the allergy is like everything, All the ingredients that are listed in there, which is funny because you can put all the ingredients but it don't tell you how much ingredients.
Speaker 2:No, but by law, when you list the ingredients, it is by percentage, so whatever's at the top is what it has the most of. By law. That's what every label must include Yep.
Speaker 2:That's why, when we were looking for the seasonal, if you look at all the seasonings, the flavored, flavored ones, the very first ingredient is salt, because in that bottle, majority of that seasoning is salt the second one will tell you what there's the second most of, and the third and so on, and so so whatever's at the bottom, that's what they have the least amount in there that's, that's every label for any, anything, anything at all. We grab a can of coke right now and you look at the ingredients list. Whatever's at the top is what there is most of. Whatever's at the bottom is what there's the least amount of.
Speaker 1:Oh shit, I learned something new today.
Speaker 2:Y'all.
Speaker 1:Well, thank you.
Speaker 2:I had to in order to label my handmade cosmetics properly.
Speaker 1:Ah, okay, it's something that I had to follow too.
Speaker 2:So if you look at my ingredients list, you'll see that my main you know my base is made of titanium dioxide and whatever, and at the end it's silica, or you know what I mean, like whatever. There's like two percent in there, yeah. So guess what I had to do?
Speaker 1:a lot of math you know, yeah, to figure out the stupid percentages so that I can abide by the law, ridiculous it is it is ridiculous but that's not including the, the math for the formulas. Oh my god, that kills me I'm like, can I just have a?
Speaker 2:scientist for this part, please. Like I, I love playing frankenstein. I really do but I don't like to do the math part. It's like you do the equations and I'll do the mixes.
Speaker 1:Yeah, exactly, uh. But you know, I think it's one of those things I just I it's fun to make and I know that the last podcast we did with how I was so heated with math, but it's what we need it we do need it it's for everything, including building buildings. Remember, shut the fuck up I were good until you got to that part. We were good until you got to that part. We were good until you got there.
Speaker 2:Dude, you need it for everything. Why was building supposed to be excluded? That needs to be the safest shit ever.
Speaker 1:That's why you build it.
Speaker 2:And you're like no, no.
Speaker 1:Yes, what do you mean? Do they have to put it in a sentence structure as to what it's gonna fucking be like?
Speaker 2:no, the construction company has 420, two by threes, two by fours how many whoa, whoa, whoa? How many did you?
Speaker 1:just put a sentence with numbers because motherfucker put it on the board.
Speaker 2:Just just write it on the board for me, please thank you how many 12 foot two by fours are they gonna need per floor?
Speaker 1:per floor like give me break it, charlie dude, break it down for me, man yeah, I couldn't.
Speaker 2:I'd help my uncle and my grandfather whenever they do construction, but don't ask me to do the math part. Nope, they did it and I'm like cool beans because I ain't going to do it.
Speaker 1:Bitch, I can do simple math, that's it. I know that one plus one equals two.
Speaker 2:I can do simple math and I know two plus two equals four.
Speaker 1:I just didn't want to. I know that I'm I'm just the six. So if I was flexible, I would be the folding six.
Speaker 2:Dear Lord no the folding nine. You'd be the zero.
Speaker 1:I'd be Tigger.
Speaker 2:Tigger's, your spirit animal.
Speaker 1:Tigger is he's every gay person's embodiment of it's, of everything he's every dude spirit animal.
Speaker 2:How about that?
Speaker 1:he really is, he's every dude my, my oldest dog. I'm gonna miss that. If he has ties, he just humps his mouth in a fucking circle.
Speaker 2:I'm just like that's that's beautiful that's beautiful movie like what is your dog?
Speaker 1:oh my god, yep he goes around in circles he's servicing himself yeah, he really does. He pays himself from biscuits and kisses he will. He will hump his own mouth and come and give you a kiss hell to the no sir. Like licking and sniffing butts isn't bad enough he licks his own buttholes to pop his own anal glands. So hey, this is why I'm just like when he puts his tongue like and he times it, he times it. That dog is not fucking stupid?
Speaker 2:he's all in the mouth he really is.
Speaker 1:He's literally umatherma with the fucking eye thing. Just snatch it nice yes, he's he's pie made like fucking taking out your motherfucking eye. Dude. Just that's how fucking fast he is. That dog will fucking like bolt at you trying to get you a french kiss and all man you saw, you did, you order the works. Literally delivery in the mouth I'm like, bro, you can't, you can't be licking your ass like that and trying to give people kisses.
Speaker 2:Dude, don't be licking your ass and that and trying to give people kisses. Dude, Don't. You can't be licking your ass and servicing yourself and popping your anal glands and be licking people like that.
Speaker 1:Bro, there are some hard limits. I'm not into bestiality at all. Dog.
Speaker 2:Nobody is what's up French.
Speaker 1:Apparently, tigger doesn't know that, because he wants a french kiss every fucking person that comes in this motherfucking home and he wants to get between your motherfucking legs and then he wants to get into yeah, literally my germs. He wants to lick your butthole too.
Speaker 2:No privacy sir, away from my genitalia please everyone's like do you walk around naked?
Speaker 1:No, you cannot walk. No, not in this apartment, until he dies. You may have a good chance you may be able to walk around naked, because the other two dogs are small, so they can't reach.
Speaker 2:The best they can do is maybe reach your calves.
Speaker 1:And if your balls are hanging low enough, they may just be a cat.
Speaker 2:Maybe Mooshu.
Speaker 1:Maybe Mooshu Maybe.
Speaker 2:Mooshu. Maybe Mooshu he's like oh look toys, I need a toy.
Speaker 1:You know what's a really fun toy, but there can't be no glass and I mean no glass around or any type of breakable things. A racquetball you throw that racquetball in a fucking empty space. Those dogs go fucking haywire for it yeah I had a, we had to. I still have this racquetball that tigger used to have a long time ago and it survived for nine years straight and it's still going strong. I don't know Something about the racquetball that I can just throw it and just and he's just going for it. I'm just like.
Speaker 2:That's why, because it's a never stopping toy, yeah, I'm okay with that.
Speaker 1:I think if I ever had the money for it I would build a racquetball court just for my dog so I can just toss him in there with a little cannon Just watch him go crazy All the racquetballs you can ask for.
Speaker 2:Can you imagine Pretty much I have a freaking I got the fucking ball pit that I have with all the balls. Oh, that's right. Did they ever play with that?
Speaker 1:No.
Speaker 2:You never set it up for them.
Speaker 1:How.
Speaker 2:You can push the couch back, bitch, that's too much fucking work. The couch back to the boys.
Speaker 1:Bitch, that's too much fucking work. Child of a dude.
Speaker 2:Push the couch back and get them a pool.
Speaker 1:Nah, dude, a fucking pool in this apartment.
Speaker 2:A little kiddie pool fool.
Speaker 1:Bitch. Those kiddie pools are still bigger than this fucking living room.
Speaker 2:No, it's not. Yes, it is Bitch. They're like four feet diameter. How are you going to act?
Speaker 1:But anywho, that's the end of our podcast. I do appreciate y'all tuning in to the craftiness of our stories and the do's, the don'ts, the woes and everything else in between, because you know, crafting is a bitch more of the story crafting is fun.
Speaker 2:How dare you uh moral of the?
Speaker 1:story here moral, moral of the story one more time.
Speaker 2:Moral of the story one more time moral of the story do it in slow motion moral of the story. I have not met a single person that doesn't actually follow that directed the moment I fucking say it no, for real not a single person, and I love it. Every time I'm like I'm gonna run into somebody this and be like no, I never do and I never do, and I love it, I love everybody, everybody that I've ever said that wait, do it in slow motion and they'll do it.
Speaker 2:People don't even think, they just do it. And then everybody's laughing. They're like I hate you and I'm like you're the one that followed it I know I didn't make you, I just said it you're the one that did it. Moral of the story can you imagine doing a whole episode like that?
Speaker 1:a bitch if people would fucking quit on us quickly yeah, they would we'd be the sloth from fucking. Oh god, zootopia no, I would love to see a podcast with him. I would fucking love to see a podcast the voice actor who does him?
Speaker 2:and just I would I would start to be like can I put this on like two speed, get on three, five, ten you probably would have to put on ten speed just to fucking hear normally, yeah, I wouldn't be able to dude, I would not be like hurry up and get to the damn point.
Speaker 1:Anywho, thank you so much for tuning in for the mitch or mischief podcast and I do appreciate I wouldn't be able to dude, I wouldn't, I'd be like hurry up and get to the damn point. Anywho, Thank you so much for tuning in for the Mitcher and Mischief podcast and I do appreciate every single one of y'all for tuning in all over the world and I appreciate every single one of y'all. And of course, the moral of the story is crafting is expensive bitch.
Speaker 2:I will not disagree with that.
Speaker 1:Exactly. I'm not gonna say fuck crafting, because hell. No, we need it sometimes we fuck around crafting um, but anywho, I love y'all. Bye.
