Mature Mischief podcast
Greetings, Gremlyns!
Join us on the Mature Mischief podcast with your Host Jesse James and Co-Host Dee Dee.
Embark on a journey filled with mishaps, awkward moments, and adulting wins. Prepare to laugh, cringe, and nod along with every episode!
Ready to embrace the chaos of adulting and find solace in shared experiences? Let the Mature Mischief Podcast guide you through the ups and downs of life.
Don't miss out on the genuine hilarity that comes with being a grown-up. We'll show you how to turn mundane moments into comedic gold!
Mature Mischief Podcast: Because growing up may be tough, but finding humor in it is always a joy! Tune in now!
Mature Mischief podcast
When Life Kicks You in the Dick, Keep Fighting
Sometimes a podcast that's meant to be about shenanigans takes a sharp turn into raw, vulnerable territory. That's exactly what happened in this episode of Mature Mischief, where what began as our usual Saturday banter quickly transformed into an unfiltered look at the financial breaking points so many adults are facing right now.
Jesse opens up about the very real threat of car repossession, mounting debt, and the crushing weight of continuously falling behind with no safety net. "I'm white-knuckling a lot of things," he admits, sharing the emotional toll of watching opportunities slip away while financial pressures mount. This isn't just Jesse's story – it's the reality for countless listeners who are silently fighting the same battles against an unforgiving economy where $40 buys just four items at the grocery store.
The conversation delves deep into the painful lessons that come with adulting: learning who truly belongs in your inner circle, the necessity of making decisions without seeking others' approval, and finding the strength to keep going when everything seems to be falling apart. DD provides grounding wisdom throughout, reminding us that "it's not about the blame, it's about the lesson," as they explore how financial struggles often force us to face our deepest insecurities and challenges.
What makes this episode particularly powerful is its honesty about the vicious cycles we find ourselves trapped in – not just financially, but emotionally and relationally. The hosts don't offer empty platitudes or quick fixes, but instead create space for acknowledging how fucking hard it is to exist in this economy while still maintaining hope.
Whether you're facing your own financial crisis or simply feeling the squeeze of inflation, this conversation will remind you that you're not alone in your struggle. As Jesse puts it: "Where there's a will, there's a way out." Join us for this unexpectedly deep dive into what it truly means to survive and find meaning when life keeps kicking you in the dick.
Platforms
Breather break
What's up, Gremlins? Welcome back to another podcast. My name is Jesse James. I hope everyone's doing it well. You know the drill. This is the Mature Mischief Podcast.
Speaker 2:One more time, one more time uh, it's saturday, holy shit it's uh. Time is flying faster than I can keep track with it. It's uh, you know what same, yeah same, I feel you I'm.
Speaker 1:I'm trying to figure out which way is up, which way is down.
Speaker 2:I am, I know, it's there, it's, I know if you're over there and I'm over here and I have no idea which way is up.
Speaker 1:Yeah, my goodness, my dogs or something else, I swear um, but it's just, uh, been an amazing, uh, it's been an amazing ride. So far. I've I thoroughly have enjoyed this week coming in with my friend from Arizona, with hanging out with the new guy that he'll be going back soon. So it's been a crazy roller coaster ride. So there's that and I'm appreciative of a lot of it. You know what I mean. There's still stuff in the woodworks that's kind of I'm white knuckling, a lot of the things and everything that's going through. So hopefully everything just kind of works out in my favor, the way it's supposed to. So we'll see how that happens and how that works out for the most part. But, as it being said, I know it, you know it, the whole world knows it. I like saying my name twice. I am your host, jesse james and I am your co-host dd yo dd.
Speaker 1:What do you do, sister d so?
Speaker 2:my roller coaster is still on loop. This is week number three.
Speaker 1:Dude, I feel that I feel that, but you know what time it is, dd I.
Speaker 2:I do.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's time for shenanigans, shenanigans, shenanigans, shenanigans, shenanigans.
Speaker 2:I don't know why I was expecting your.
Speaker 1:I'm not the one who's so far away when I feel the sneak bite into my veins. Never did I want to be here again, and I don't know something like that that was funny that was fucking awesome, with my fat breath in between y'all gonna be hearing our fat breath the whole episode. You guys, we just ate before this, so no shit, we're still full it's just so funny, how fun, like, how far in advance we record everything, because it's just like dude, it's one thing on top of another on top of.
Speaker 1:I mean, I'm granted, I like that we record so much in a short period of time, like it's uh, it's a great, it's great, I like it I like it because it breaks the monotonous routine that for me personally, that I have it with life yeah you know what I mean, because if not, I'd just be stuck at home and work and home and work, and home and work it does, I think, uh, but this is kind of like one of my favorite podcasts that I've actually worked on in a very long time, besides Double Trouble 361 with Jamie, so it's just one of these. It's been a phenomenal journey. It's been a literally rollercoaster ride with the podcast, because it goes up, it goes down, it goes up, it goes down, it goes up, it goes down. It's just been consistent for a lot of it, though, but you know it is what it is.
Speaker 2:It's a roller coaster.
Speaker 1:It is uh, you know I, I was, I'm thinking because it's like I like a good shenanigans against podcast for a saturday and being able to talk and just be a goofball, and why not?
Speaker 1:it's, uh, I don't know my goofballness, just kind of just my goofball just tanked just tanked hard, um uh, it's just, life has really become funny bones, stop being tickled yeah, it's that it the pickle juice is no longer there, but it's, it's literally just a thing of just a matterness of like kind of getting everything kind of pretty much together. You know, when you're like falling so far behind on things that are just like you're, it's.
Speaker 1:It's one thing after another, after another, after another, and you're feeling you're feeling the build-up, the pressure I am feeling that build-up pressure and not even in a fucking good way, because it's um, I'm fucked up, I fucked up on a lot of it, like this whole thing in the past really fucked me up with that, and then trying to catch up with everything, and still trying to catch up with everything, it's uh, becomes very like emotional. You know what I mean. So, um, it's uh, it's, it's insane.
Speaker 2:You know life, it's life you know it's life, it's life, it's life.
Speaker 1:I'm trying to make a good thing, a positive, good thing, happen here, because it's one of those things like I'm just trying to kind of figure out where I'm at in this hell and it's a continuous loop cycle, continuous loop every single time and it's it doesn't know when to stop, it doesn't know when to end. Um, I do feel that one day I'm just going to wake up and it's just going to be pretty much taken from my entire arson. You know what I mean?
Speaker 1:My entire hands I I'm not gonna sleep well tonight. I really know I'm not gonna sleep well tonight. You know it's uh, it's a heavy, it's a heavy, it's a heavy burden it really is, and I don't know if I have no one else to blame but than myself, than anything else, because I allowed it to get so far.
Speaker 2:So and how everything is just to get to where it's at yeah.
Speaker 1:So I'm just trying to catch up with it and this is like the furthest I've ever fallen behind and I can't fall back on family or relatives to be able to like, hey, can I get some help? Hey, can I do this? I've been someone and it's crazy because we did that whole chat gpt thing and whatnot and it really says it's not a joke. Like, you do something so fast, so quickly, and you're trying to be creative and you're trying to get things the ball rolling on a lot of things, and every time you get the ball rolling on something, one thing hits right after another, after another, after another, and you don't have anybody who you can initially turn to to ask for the help that you need. So everything you're pretty much doing on it's just basically on your own right.
Speaker 2:Which fits into you needing to get your independence which is crazy.
Speaker 1:It is, it's finding that independency, no matter, no matter what, yeah that was one of your purposes.
Speaker 2:That's, I'm like wow, thanks, but I get it like because mine's kind of similar. But my thing is, every time I put myself first.
Speaker 1:That's when life likes to you know, be a douchebag and be like oh when I think you can be happy like now and I've gained my independency through a lot, though, but I think a lot of it. I realize that I'm I'm not. I'm independent, yes, but I'm also not somebody who's just like I. I don't know what else to do. This is kind of owned it, yet that's all it is.
Speaker 2:That's why these lessons keep coming up for us. It's because we haven't learned the full extent of what we're supposed to. We're working on it, we're doing some of it. We've come so far, but not where we're supposed to be. That way we need to go, because if we did, we wouldn't have these pop-ups anymore yeah that's the shitty part.
Speaker 2:But so I do want to like comment how you had said. You know you have no one to blame except for you. But that's just it. It's not about the blame, it's about the lesson is for you yeah that's what I mean. I know it sucks because, yes, we are in control only a certain, to a certain extent.
Speaker 2:So, yeah, sure, because I could say the same things like well, I'm here because of my choices so I got nobody to blame, but I don't blame myself, I'm just kind of like it is what it is, I did what I did.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I am blaming myself for it, because it's like it's kind of it's it's a lesson, that it's just like I don't know what this lesson is, that I have to learn from it or what I'm gaining from it. It's just one of those things, like I am literally in a place where I am like I don't know what else to do, like I'm kind of.
Speaker 2:And that's the point. Yeah, that's the shitty part they don't tell you what the lesson is but what happens is they're pushing you to your limits.
Speaker 1:You know why?
Speaker 2:Because that's the part that's going to teach you the lesson.
Speaker 2:That's the shitty part, because that's the part where we that we've been trying to avoid, we don't want to get pushed to those limits, because we're, like, I've been trying to work so hard to avoid that and it's here, seriously, like, come on, like why happen, though, if I do that? But that's the point is to be like you wouldn't have taken care of it unless I put you under the most shittiest pressure right here, right now, and then it's like oh, I'm like, why put me in the most shittiest pressure ever because you didn't do it before you had?
Speaker 2:chances and you didn't. So now it's like, okay, now we have to apply pressure in order for you to do what you need to do, because you need to do it I had opportunities and I had opportunities to be able to work on certain things that needed to be worked on.
Speaker 1:Like I had it and everyone just fucking crushed those things that I wanted to do, so so bad. And now that I'm like in a position, I'm just like I can't do those things now because I literally almost had the opportunity and I got stuck where you are here now. I'm literally stuck in the place because it's like I'm letting things get to me for whatever reason and I'm just allowing it. And just like I'm feeling bummed about it, I'm feeling in a particular type of way, in a funk, absolutely.
Speaker 2:And that's completely valid.
Speaker 1:And I'm just trying not to be so damn depressed about it Because I'm like I've already fought that. I'm just trying not to be so damn depressed about it because I'm like I've already fought, that I'm just like okay, where's the silver lining?
Speaker 2:in all of this. What can I do to kind of fix it, or at least?
Speaker 1:alleviate it or start to work on it. Starting to work on it I think it's a little too late, but it's like it's not the end of the road for me. It's like okay, cool Like I I am, I'm not giving up until I need to be. I've already spent this much money already into what I needed to get done and hopefully it gets somewhere where it needs to be right but um, I just I think this week, I think that's it.
Speaker 1:I just I don't know if I can do any more hangouts or do any more fun time or whatnot.
Speaker 2:You got to buckle down. I got to buckle down.
Speaker 1:I got to buckle down even harder because it's like I don't know what else to do.
Speaker 2:Maybe that was the lesson.
Speaker 1:Probably. Maybe that was the lesson, probably.
Speaker 2:We know you want this in your life, but in order to get this, you need to fix this first for you to have the freedom to do this.
Speaker 1:I'm trying to find a good balance. I'm trying to find the balance and all of it. Like I want to have fun and have great time and whatnot, but life is just yeah, now it's not the time like, okay, great.
Speaker 2:But like cool, but right now you need to focus on this. So here we're gonna make it a little bit more difficult so you're forced to. Once you finish this, then you'll have a little bit more breathing room, but it sucks.
Speaker 1:It sucks when it comes to your door and it's like, hey, we're here, we're here and we're queer, come and get it. Uh, it's like not now literally I don't.
Speaker 1:it is the worst timing ever. I think the letter that I got received and whatnot is the worst timing fucking ever, because my car is about to be taken away from me. So that's the underlying issue is like, when you're so behind on it because you're waiting for something and you're calling, and you're calling and you're wanting answers and I just finished talking to him about it too I'm just like this is what I was. I knew it. I knew this was going to happen because now I'm on a time crunch.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you mentioned it.
Speaker 1:I was on a time crunch and I told him if my vehicle gets, if it's gone, I have no way of transportation to be able to get to from and where. Granted, I can probably do an Uber I mean four days out of the week and whatnot and someone can pick me up afterwards. It's not an issue. So I mean there's out of the week and whatnot and someone can pick me up afterwards, it's not an issue. So I mean there's a will, there's a way. It's not the end of the world for me to just go. Oh hey, by the way, I'm fucked, but that's more money out of my pocket I don't want to spend. You know what I mean? Like $45 every fucking day for four days in a month. Like no fucking thank you, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2:So what's the point? You know?
Speaker 1:and and it's funny because I think that people think that podcast is like oh yeah, we can, we're probably making something out of it. No, we're not, we, we, we, we're not making anything off of this fucking thing.
Speaker 1:Like this is like literally kind of like a vlog or a blog, like people like us talking and venting and um and whatnot, and we're sharing yeah, we're sharing with y'all this is what the mature I've always said it before, this is what the mature mission podcast has always been about is just venting and on unraveling everything and it's just like with the shit life hands you as an adult, and this is the perfect example.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it is a perfect example, and I think if my car gets repossessed because I've fallen so behind on my payments, it is what it is at the end of the day. You know what I mean? I think the only thing that's going to be harder is us recording a podcast and doing it. It's just trying to find that motherfucking downtime and it's getting harder, and I've got to fucking find a way to build the credit, build it back to where it needs to be, and the only way I'm waiting for is for them to get off their fucking ass and move quickly. I probably could maybe swap it out and be done with it for maybe a used vehicle.
Speaker 2:Just for temporary purposes, just temporary. Yeah, you could just to alleviate that part so that you can do whatever it is that you need to do the rest of the way, and once everything regulates, then you can be like okay, cool, let me go back to where I was, because I had to deal with something different in order to fix everything else, that's all yeah, it's, uh, that's what I said like these, these lessons when they come along, they suck, they suck, they really do they do.
Speaker 1:It's, um, I'm not asking for any handouts or anything. This is not the idea of it. Or, like you know, I'm asking for handouts or you know whatnot like I'm literally doing my own thing and I'm trying to get it. I have some pillows that I worked on maybe two of them, uh but I haven't really kind of pushed the whole narrative, trying to get it all to where it needs to be, though, but, um, like I said, when I, when I had the opportunity to do it, and I heard voices in my head or people in my ear to do something, and they're just like whoa, x, y and Z, I listened and I got into my own head with it. You know what I mean. So it's a feeling I don't ever recommend period. A feeling I don't ever recommend period and, um, this is something that is just like I. I don't like it because I know once I go and drop you off, at home.
Speaker 2:I'm staying up to heaven knows what time trying to figure shit out.
Speaker 1:I know yeah, trying to like wrap my fucking head around everything. You know what I mean. It's like I don't know. I I feel like I have no one else to blame but myself and I I'm not actually like I do need to own up to that at least, and that's fine, but it's, it's not necessarily about the blame.
Speaker 2:it's cool. Like I said, what's done is done and there's no changing or going back. However, if you're here in this place that you didn't intend to be from here on out, it's just okay. I did what I did. It's whatever. I'm not going to blame myself, necessarily, but it is my issue to deal with. Okay, cool, I did what I did. Now, what can I do to just change the trajectory? That's all. That's all Cause. Right here, I'm in a shitty place and all I need to do is switch it and go in a different direction. That's all, that's all, because right here, I'm in a shitty place and all I need to do is switch it and go in a different direction. That's a little bit better than where I'm already going.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:Because that's not for me. It's not meant for me, obviously, or else there wouldn't be friction right now, but there's friction, so that's like I said, there's hardcore friction and friction is for lessons, fr.
Speaker 2:The reason why there's friction is because something in your life does not belong. Otherwise there would not be any friction. That's the shitty part and I know it sucks because people just like and I'm like, sorry, it's the harsh truth. It's coming from a loving place, it's just. It's one of those things like there's nothing I can say that can make it any better at all.
Speaker 1:But if you're aware of I'm aware of the friction, I'm aware of everything and I and I get now it's just coming up with whatever it is that you need to do I, I, I feel like everything that has happened the way it has happened because I relied on somebody who I was with for almost four years.
Speaker 1:I was very complicit in my space that I had, we had extra income to be able to do the things we did. Epilepsy, my health elevate, just got in the fucking way. That accident that happened, the gallbladder thing that happened, money just kind of just like just took a fucking dumb dude. And yeah, I think what it is is that I'm not paying attention to a lot of my craft that I need to be able to do, and what I mean by craft, my spiritual shit, because I prolonged, because when I was focused on it and I had it, things were going smoothly. Now that I'm ignoring it, things are bad, pretty much kicking me in the fucking ass and I'm just like I. I had emotion, I had a plan, I had it in my fucking hand and I should have just done it.
Speaker 2:It's cool, like I said, what's done is done. What's done is done.
Speaker 1:I know what done is done. It is what it is.
Speaker 2:Now it's just like okay how do I start? Working on switching it.
Speaker 1:I'm going to need a fucking huge switch. I mean, I'm gonna need a fucking miracle beyond a miracle like it's one of those things like, okay, fine, we're, we're, this is happening, this is what's gonna be, and if I have to fucking sell whatever I have left, to fucking sell collections, collectibles yeah whatever it is I have, I am so be it.
Speaker 2:So be it. This is about your survival at this point.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like I, need to be able to come up with you know almost four grand for a fucking vehicle that I have, that I was supposed to be keeping up payments and trying to keep up with it. Now the insurance has skyrocketed to almost $500 a month. It's like I I don't know Everything that I have, everything that I own, everything that's here. It just it's going to have to go. It really is.
Speaker 1:I think the only thing that I'm not going to be able to sell are my autographs, because they're not worth anything. They're really, even if you did. They need to be authenticated on all of them, which is just fine because I can authenticate all of them and whatnot, or whatever. But it's you know they're authenticate all of them and whatnot, or whatever, but it's you know they're all from the real characters and whatnot, but it's, I don't know. It's literally kicking me in the ass and everything is happening for reasons and I don't know what else to fucking do. I uh, it's supposed to be a shenanigans podcast and it ended up being more of a deeper inside type. It's cool.
Speaker 2:It's cool Cause, like I said, this is part of adulting and that's what mature mischief is.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean. It's not always sunshine and rainbow, it can't always be shenanigans. You know what?
Speaker 1:And the cards were telling me that too as well Like back at it debt and I think for april remember I did the whole 12 months or whatnot, that's right yeah, so that was kind of just figuring it out or whatnot, and I think I'll have to go back and re-look at the photo, though, but I think one of them is just like oh yeah, that's, that's going to be a thing for you. So the death card huh the death card I don't remember what it was. I have to look at it again.
Speaker 2:But um, because, it's usually something ending.
Speaker 1:But I need to get back into my readings. I need to get back to focus on my DATs, all of that, my ancestors I've been slacking a lot and being able to ask for their help and guidance. I literally I think that's what me doing it on my own is that I need to ask for more help and ask for more guidance, Like the more I get into who I am as a person. This is not like trying to like oh yeah, God is the prayer. No, no, no, no. This is just me trying to fucking hone in on my stuff, Like if I'm not putting in the work, I know nothing's going to happen at all period.
Speaker 2:So it's just like yeah, you need to gather whatever it is that you need to make, the changes that you need to make right because that's that's what's going to happen here. That's what needs to happen. There's going to be life changes that you need to start adjusting to. That's going to help you out in the long run. It it's not going to be fun, because sometimes change isn't.
Speaker 1:But again, that's adult life and we have to do it and putting myself out there more, and that's what it's telling me, that I need to be able to put my life changes. I think if I did that as a person and plug in the podcast, it's just that everything we live in and now in this fucking day and age is going to be pulling teeth now because everybody is just like child. Yeah.
Speaker 2:And you know what? The fact that it's it's a monetary issue is already the biggest problem with it all because the way the economy is now, that's everybody's default repair.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Everything that's going on in some, in everybody's life right now is a money issue yeah I don't care what it is or what you say, it's a money issue.
Speaker 2:So everybody's go-to to change is to cut back on spending. Why? Because our necessities are costing us more. To survive is costing us more, so anything that's beyond the necessities we're having to chuck it. Yeah, we can't do none of it now, which is what you said earlier, is like I'm gonna have to cut back on, like going out and or hanging out or whatever, and it's like, yeah, of course, that's everybody's, everybody's thing is having to cut out the excess and now all the money can only go on survival.
Speaker 2:That's it, that's it. Necessities, food, the roof over your house, vehicle if you have transportation, and that's it, that's it, because anything beyond that risks you losing all of the things that help you survive.
Speaker 1:That's the shitty part, yeah, I know, and it's just like, for some reason, I feel that there's more being attached to me, like someone did something. I don't know if that makes any sense, but it's, it's just. It's just me feeling paranoid. I don't know, maybe, maybe, but it's just like now that I'm honed in and now that I'm just beyond pissed like I am so angry right now that my entire sensory overload is like focus and honed in on a lot of things. And now it's just like, okay, we're gonna play that game. Then fine, I'm gonna. Then you're not gonna like me when I hone in on my skills a little bit better. So, um, and this is not I'm not saying, oh, kind of like witchcraft or whatnot, but when I know, when it's somebody doing something stupid and they don't want me to succeed because they want me to fail for whatever reason, and I kind of know and I can pinpoint it to like someone wanting this to happen, then we have a fucking issue. I have a big fucking issue with that, because it's not like I have done anything wrong to anybody at all whatsoever and we and talking about it and whatnot, it's just like, okay, fine, if I need to hone in on my skills just a little bit better.
Speaker 1:Show my skills because I've allowed myself to be so complicit to what I have been comfortable in doing. And I remember and I said this to one person because the person's like I don't like change, like why does change have to happen? Because if you don't do change and you're complicit to everything in your entire surrounding, no matter, you stay stuck. And that's what happened to me. I stayed complicit, I stayed inside. I became this introvert for whatever fucking reason. That's not me at all and I've, I've.
Speaker 1:I allowed myself to stay indoors so much that I allowed these walls around me to trap me in in my own creativity space and whatnot. I allowed junk clutter everything around me. Just get the fucking best of me. Like I'm ready to the point where I'm just like fuck it, I don't even want to do this anymore. I'm tired. I really just need a break from all of this because it's just like it's not getting me anywhere.
Speaker 1:I think that's why my podcast is I've always been at a halt on a lot of things is because I don't know what else to do other than just to kind of hone in on my skills. I don't want to have to go to a fucking 10 hour day shift for four days out of the fucking week or whatnot. And everybody did the whole spill and whatnot and how I felt about that and whatever. You know, I just I. I want to be able to make money, make a living and do good and making a business now, at the age of fucking 37, at the age of fucking 37, at a late start granted, everyone has a late- start.
Speaker 2:Everyone has a late start.
Speaker 1:Depends on who yeah, doesn't matter, but it's like, damn, I look back at something. Yeah, I had a very successful life in that past because I was very successful at what I did, what I needed to do, what I need to get back up and whatnot. And now I'm in a place where, dude, I'm just I can't, like I can't do it, like I'm trying and I can, I'm trying, I can. And you know, it's that just continuous loop, every fucking site, every single time, every single cycle.
Speaker 2:It's that if you if you're stuck in loops, it's because there's something that you keep making the same decisions on, hence why you stay stuck in those loops, or what are they called Vicious cycles. There you go.
Speaker 1:Those vicious cycles. I know what those vicious cycles are. It's not something I can't say oh, I don't know what it is. I know what the fuck it is. The vicious cycle is just me going. I allow this person, this person, this person and this person, and this person and this person and this person to do what it is.
Speaker 2:And now you're at the culmination again, where you have to make a decision to not make it about anybody else except for yourself.
Speaker 1:That's pretty much it, and that's because it's like I'm done. That's why, when people are like you, just don't listen. When someone says, don't do it, I'm going to fucking do it regardless. Like it's like I'm not. I'm tired of you telling me not to do something and.
Speaker 1:I'm going to do it anyways, because I know if I don't fucking jump at this and you're fucking telling me that I can't do something, I'm going to do it regardless. Now, rather, if you have my back or not, I'm going to fucking do it, right or not, I'm gonna fucking do it right. It's just one of those things, like you, when opportunity knocks and I've heard and I've said this so many fucking times when opportunity knocks, take that fucking knock and take it and open the door and run with it. And because opportunity does not knock twice and the reason is because sore knuckles, my fucking opportunities have been bleeding throughout the fucking ass every single time when it comes down to it, when it came down to poetry, came down to writing all my creative styles and skills, and it just it tanked, it tanked.
Speaker 1:I had someone who I created and helped build a platform for his poetry, and then he got, you know, he didn't say hey, let's do this, let's continue going, let's. I got fucking the shit into the stick again as well, because now it's just like hey, how's everything going? Are you excited, is that? And it's just like oh well, you keep asking the same question. The fuck like all of that every single time it fucking piles up on me and I hate chat gpt because it was fucking right. I just want to be acknowledged for everything that I fucking do and it's just like I. I get it like, it's like and it's true. The people around you, who you've, and I have that intuition and I should have just continued to listen to my intuition for everything.
Speaker 2:It's cool because we're human. Sometimes it's hard because sometimes we question, sometimes we want difference. You know what I mean. So we'll go and we'll just do it, and then later on we're like I knew I shouldn't have, but I still did it Like why did I? Why did it do that Like?
Speaker 1:it's a human thing.
Speaker 2:It's part of the human existence, or the human experience, or the human experience. It's okay. It just means, like I said, if it's repetitive, it's showing you who can and can't be in your little circle. That's it, plain and simple. You can't extend your generosity to everybody like you usually do, which is it's awesome. It's a beautiful trait that you have that you're so generous with yourself. But in this world, especially in this day and age, you can't trust everybody anymore. You just can't, because everybody's out for number one and it sucks.
Speaker 1:It sucks. It just sucks that I gave this individual, this or that individual, that this and that, that and the other, this and that, that and the other, and every single time I I'm so mad, so angry, and I've given opportunities after opportunities after opportunities to a lot of people to kind of explain themselves. And it sucks, because it's just like maybe that's the lesson.
Speaker 2:It's not about anybody else anymore. Period it's.
Speaker 1:I know I've always been trying to work on myself every single time. Every time I said you know what Fuck it, I'm not doing it anymore and I don't.
Speaker 2:Don't say anything to anyone.
Speaker 1:I don't, I haven't.
Speaker 2:Just do whatever it is that you feel that you need to do and don't involve anybody anymore. Period Unless it's somebody that you can absolutely trust. Because that that you can absolutely trust because that's that's the thing is the moment you tell somebody which you think because I'm like, oh well, I'm sharing this with my friends, this is something I really want to do and I share it with them, and they're like, oh, that's great, but deep down they're just like I hope it don't work out for her.
Speaker 1:I I told uh, one of our mutual friends, uh twink, that I can't trust him anymore. I I legit told him. I was like I can't trust you, dude. Like I, I, the only person who I can talk to and who I can trust and talking to is dd. He goes, that's fair. He goes, that's fair. I was like we had a great friendship, we had an amazing friendship. You would talk to me and you would open up to me.
Speaker 1:For whatever reason, you turned and you went heel on me. Like you, I I don't recall whatever I did to you and whatever that was. Have I ever done anything morally wrong, minus the night that you and I played? And you can't say that. Oh, even though, yes, I've taken the blame for that. And I said you know what, I'll take that blame from you, even though, yes, I've taken the blame for that. And I said you know what, I'll take that blame from you. What? Not, though? But you're also an adult. You enjoyed it. I think you know what it was.
Speaker 1:You were scared because you enjoyed something that you know you cannot have, and if you did have it, because you were in a throuple, you don't want to do it again. You don't want to do it again. I was like so you decided to turn your back on me, do what you did the most and talk to the person who I despise and keep in a cordial atmosphere for someone period. And you're still talking to them Because, oh, they're your friends too. They were never your friends to begin with. I was like but I love this journey for you because you said yourself, you're in your villain error. Honey, there is nothing about villainous, about anything that you're doing, period whatsoever.
Speaker 1:On that I was like I'm not trying to be a dick here, though, but you, you fucking, you kicked me in the dick, and you kicked me in the dick hard, like fucking you know whatnot, and I'm just like dude, and I know people are just like oh, you're just going around in circles. You're going around circles like you're talking. You're like you're not making any sense. You're right, I'm not making any sense, I'm just fucking venting. This is pretty much it. Yeah, like it, it is what it is. I can actually acknowledge that that that's what it is and that's okay but it's like I'm I'm not here to I'm.
Speaker 1:I'm to the point where I just don't. I want to give up. Like I. I I'm just saying fuck it. Like I'm ready to call and be like just come pick it up, like if it's anything. If that makes you feel any better, come pick it up. You save me fucking money for gas. You save me a thousand dollars a month on a car and I will fucking find my way to. If I have to take the motherfucking bus, if I gotta take the motherfucking uber, lyft, whatever it is, I will find a fucking way to get where I need to be. And it's to the point where I just don't give a shit anymore. You know what I mean? Because I had an opportunity and a chance to do something great. When I had, I was literally putting efforts into something. I was literally putting efforts into something when I got the final thought from somebody. It crushed me. It crushed me hard because I genuinely thought I had someone by my side to make something great and I didn't.
Speaker 2:And there's your lesson. Yeah, there's your lesson.
Speaker 1:So it's like, okay, and I want to do it again, but I can't do it again Because I don't got the fucking funds to do it, even if I wanted to do it again. Guess what I'm going to fucking need. I'm going to need a truck to be able to haul something. And what else am I going to need? I'm going to need a fucking food truck. And what is all that going to cost me? A lot, like I'm. I'm in I'm knees, I'm so fucking over it. I'm so fucking over it.
Speaker 1:And and the moral of the story is like, do you do what makes you happy? Because normally I'm always saying fuck life, like, yeah, more of the story, fuck life, but no more of the story. Literally is that don't enable somebody to be able to dictate what you can and cannot do. If you have the ability to do it and you know you can fucking do it, then fucking take the opportunity to do it. But you need to be real with yourself, at a hundred percent that you know that you can do something great.
Speaker 1:You know what I mean and in this and the way things are now, it's gonna be fucking complex. You know what I mean because everybody's listening, everybody's tuning in. They want to know the next political thing. They want to be able to attack somebody else whose political views don't align to another person at all whatsoever. And I'm not trying to get political at all whatsoever because I will say fuck trump, I don't like trump.
Speaker 1:That's as simple as that. I didn't vote for him because I know I'm not stupid. So it's simple as that. But at the same time, I'm also not going to sit here and fucking say, hey, I'm not gonna, I'm just gonna keep fucking pushing nothing that anything that he says remotely or whatever he says has never affected me. To be able to accomplish and be able to say the things with you as my fans, as my gremlins who are listening, who want to continue on and just need a nice peace of mind, someone else to kind of feel the pinch too as well. This is not about the tariffs. This is not about job security. This is not about anything political. This is literally just two people on a motherfucking podcast talking and venting about something that About life.
Speaker 2:About life, that just like me, trying to find pockets of joy wherever we can. Yeah, I'm trying to share with you guys, because we know it's just as hard for you all. Yeah. Because in the long run. That's just what it is.
Speaker 1:And I know people are going to be like well, why do you still hang out with these people? Or still, why you do what you do? Be quite honest, I don't know, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter, it honestly doesn't matter, because what was done was done.
Speaker 2:That's it, that done what's done, that's it, that's it, that's it. But now, like you said, the moral of your story is you cannot allow anybody else influence in your head and your heart for shit Period. If it's you, do it, don't bother relying on anybody else to stop, because if you don't, then none of their words can affect you. It doesn't matter, no, and if they're not, anybody that's going to be supportive, then they probably don't belong in your circle. Period, and that's okay. Can you still be cordial? Sure, but do you have to extend anything to them in your connection? Not, necessarily Not if you realize that it's something that is not benefiting you mutually.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:If it's not, then it's okay, just go about your business, that's it. If it's not, then it's okay, just go about your business, that's it. That's it. No big deal, no drama, no whatever. Because nobody else is going to give you the attention that you need to help you on your personal journey. Why? Because everybody else is struggling on their personal journeys too.
Speaker 1:Everyone's struggling. Everybody is Everyone's struggling In a different way.
Speaker 2:We know you all are struggling.
Speaker 1:I think what's struggling us the most and I can actually say this is that when COVID hit and we got the stimulus check right after that, no one got tax returns period. We're paying back into the government. When was the last time anybody got a good motherfucking tax return and to be able to show for it? No one.
Speaker 2:It doesn't matter how many fucking kids you got, you're still paying back to the irs because you got a pretty penny, it's gone because everything in the economy had to go up, because the checks were distributed so you got a pretty penny, but it's gone instantly.
Speaker 1:Yeah, because I think this is why I I'm like so behind on paying my taxes, because it's just like not that I haven't paid him, because I haven't even followed them, but still so. It's like it's one thing after another, after another, after another, and after another, and it's kicking me in the fucking dick every fucking time maybe our lesson here is we just need to learn how to adult better.
Speaker 2:I don't know.
Speaker 1:I don't know. I mean hashtag, adult, better hashtag, give us some pointers hashtag hashtag help somebody, sugar daddy, sugar mamas anybody, all sugar everybody actually are there any more sugar mamas or daddies? Is the economy that bad that? That are you guys okay. All sugar mamas Are y'all okay, are y'all struggling too.
Speaker 2:I bet everybody is.
Speaker 1:You know what it is. I think that everybody's crying for that. Every single person is crying for someone to take care of them, period.
Speaker 2:Because everybody's tired of doing, and doing, and doing and doing with no break.
Speaker 1:Everyone's crying for wanting to do something and wanting to have it, and the moment they get it, the moment they have it, it's great and that's all they want, and they know what. The number one thing they forget is the relationship itself, because all they see is dollar signs. That is it. That is it.
Speaker 1:Power and control done killed the humanity and everyone, and everything we are living in this time period where things are just fucking ridiculous, it is fucking horrible, it is crazy. We just don't know how to be able to manage or be able to live at all period, because that's just how it is. You know what I mean. So until things have calmed down a whole lot, then yeah, it's gonna be all biscuits and gravy from here, because now we're having to make our own biscuits and gravy from scratch, and that's what's killing us.
Speaker 1:That's what's killing us, dude, that's what's killing us, Dude, even going to the grocery store like $20 for just like four fucking things, Like yeah, not even, that's like almost 40 bucks just for four fucking things I'm just like God damn what exactly are you supposed to make with four things?
Speaker 2:It's going to last you, that's exactly. And this is because it's only you and your husband. It's only me and my aunt.
Speaker 1:Can you imagine people who have entire families? Dude, I'm like when you have more than one or more. And I see people like with two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, all I'm like bro, stay off of her. Like why do you need that big of a fucking family?
Speaker 2:how are you surviving?
Speaker 1:that's what I want to know, what I mean, bro. I wonder what job you got. I want to suck your dick too, and your bosses, god damn like shit like I will eat your girlfriend's pussy too. I just don't want to touch her because she's frugal. Damn like. Is there anything left inside of her? Like holy shit, like I know she has no more nutrition inside of her to be able to create fucking babies anymore.
Speaker 2:Like no more nutrition.
Speaker 1:Like damn, You're popping out kids.
Speaker 1:That's awesome. Look, man, you're taking Taste of rainbow to a whole fucking level. Man, you're popping out kids like fucking popcorn, man, but no, seriously moral of the story of it and all. And be able to do all of it, um on it. As I said before, yes, fuck life, but in legit reality of it all. To be able to do all of it on it. As I said before, yes, fuck life, but in legit reality of it all.
Speaker 1:And to be able to give, like, somebody a piece of advice that may happen and if they're ever thinking like, oh, they're on the brink of, you know, wanting to end it for whatever reason, just note that there is, and always will be, a will. Where there's a will, there's a way out. Period, and I get it. You're just like that's not what I wanted to hear. You matter in this lifetime period. You were set. You were put here for a fucking reason, rather if you consented to it or if you did not consent to it, we're here, even if you're in a predicament where things just fucking happen every single time. What you do from those learning curves, no matter what, you make something fucking great and determines everything.
Speaker 1:Push back, fight back, do what you need to do, punch your boss in the fucking dick if you need to, if that makes you feel good about it. Look, if we all go to jail, we're all gonna fucking have a better lifestyle, because you know what they're willing to do it. But apparently now they're shipping us all out somewhere else, like, well, you know what, ship me out, if I'm fucking over there, it'll be one hell of a vacation and you can't find me. So go fucking figure, like, like, whatever and I know it's pretty bad because I've seen the pictures and all of it and whatnot. I'm just like at this point kink is a fucking thing. I think I will call someone a fucking master.
Speaker 2:Yes, daddy Harder, god damn man, You'll be fine.
Speaker 1:I don't know about the rest of us. But you'll be fine, I don't know about the rest of us but you'll be fine yo, the way things are.
Speaker 1:I'm just like all of us just need to fucking catch a break. There has to be at least one one good fucking person just be able to say fuck this, we're not doing this anymore. We need to give money back to the people of the lower class, middle class, bring down the debt deficit completely down. And it seems like this whole thing has just been one fuck show after another fuck show, like holy shit, what happened? Like and nope, nope. Everybody wants to have their legs tucked between, and I get it, because generations, the younger ones are fighting. They are fucking fighting hard to get where they need to be at, and and I thank you so much for fighting, because even we have voices and doing it. It's, it's, it's getting kind of hard. It's getting harder and harder and harder every single day. But, anywho, that's the end of my podcast, that's's my vent, not anything. You got any moral stories.
Speaker 2:No, no, everybody's in the same boat. I can say the cliche shit to be nice and be kind, because at least that doesn't cost anybody anything. And it's because everybody's struggling, like, just don't be douchebags, don't Everybody's already dealing with enough shit? The least you can do is just extend basic human decency. Nothing more than that Basic human decency, please, because everybody's dealing with some shit.
Speaker 1:What is that?
Speaker 1:Because I think we've just lost all of that out the motherfucking window for some apparent reason exactly because if everybody had it, everybody could handle things a little bit better oh, we had human decency for a good while when, like right after uh, bush left office and we were hitting that that fucking dip, and we had a good economy after a good eight years from all the fucking cleanup and everything from george w bush. And when we had in the 90s where things were a little bit better, when, uh, uh, bill clinton was in office and when texas was actually a democratic state and things were good in the 90s. Yeah, things were fucking great. I can think back on it and just go look at the history and the prices of everything. It wasn't until bush took office, gas prices went up, everything went up, all of it went up. And then it's just like whoa, like no one kept a good economical standards once obama left and then became trump's and trump's economy.
Speaker 1:Yo, and it's so weird. People are just like you know this and that and the other. They don't. I'm not gonna get into it. I'm not gonna get into it. I'm just not. I'm not going to.
Speaker 2:I'm not it's whatever, let's not, let's not do it, let's uh let's keep it the way.
Speaker 1:It is all right, that's it. Love ya, bye.
