91: From Working Dad to Influencer: Welcome Veteran with a Sign!

Transcript

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Um, hello everybody. Me and Sarah got talking and we're like, dammit, this is what we need to, this is what we need. Um, boy, that introduction. Yeah, sorry. Issa's missing. Um, she, she's just so busy working. I know. She's like a full-time regular person right now. Yeah. She works like regular person hours and she's doing everything. It's a big adjustment and I know some people have been asking. Oh my gosh, sorry. We just, we just need some episodes, so, um, it'll be me, Sarah, and then maybe a guest. Yeah, maybe. Um, but no, me and Sarah talking about our week and everything and yesterday Nick was looking at me sad and he's like, I haven't seen the boys at all yesterday. And I'm like, I know. Because we've had people coming from outta state coming to come visit us and see the Juujitsu Gym do podcasts. And we've just been so busy. Yeah. I'm exhausted. Yeah. I'm like, I could not do this full time. I feel like this is very reminiscent for me of like the times when Calvin was still an electrician.'cause he was gone before we wake up in the morning and then he basically would come home after everyone was asleep because of Jiujitsu. Oh. Like the day, the hour or two maybe that he was home in between like electrical and Juujitsu, he was taking a nap. Mm-hmm. So this is it. Like these last two weeks with working on gym stuff has been very reminiscent of that. Yeah. So, so I, I'm used to it to some degree, but it's also, I thought we were past this point. I know. Like, not having to live this way. I know. That's how I get with Nick traveling. Mm-hmm. Or just Nick being gone. Mm-hmm. Because electrical school, they had to be gone weekends sometimes. Yeah. Yep. Like what I mean 12 times outta the year. Yeah. Yeah. So they were gone for like a week at a time. Yeah. Yeah. Oh yeah. It wasn't a weekend. Yeah. That was when he was in the Army and doing drill weekends. Mm-hmm. So he'd be like, Hey, I've got electrical school and then I've got drill. Yeah. And I'm like, oh my God, I'm never gonna see you. Yep. So, yeah, I try not to be too crazy about it.'cause I'm like, hopefully, unless we get divorced or something crazy happens, like we'll be together forever, it's fine. But it is like, in the moment it's like, well, I missed you this week sucks. Or like, the kids really missed you. Like they talked about you a lot and they wanted to see you and you know, you weren't able to be around, but Yeah. Yeah. But why is Kelvin all busy? So we are selling our building and we're gonna be moving to a rental space. So there's just been a lot of renovations needed for your Juujitsu gym. Yeah, for the Juujitsu gym. Um, because this space is just in a, I don't know if I can say where it is, but it's just in a place where it used to be an old bank back in the day. Yeah. Our gym now in like the fifties. Oh. Our gym now. Okay. Where you're at. It was a bank like five a couple years ago. I thought it's been what? Because I never went downstairs.'cause they said it's an old safe Yeah, it was a bank a few years ago and then it was like a T-shirt place. It was after that. Like a boutique. It was a boutique, yeah. Yeah. She, but I think she printed t-shirts too. Oh. So she did a little bit of both. I think this lady, I does window cleaning. Yeah, she does. She's a window cleaner too. Yeah. She does like a few things, but which like, good for her. She is a trades woman. Yeah. I appreciate someone who has like hobbies that they all the can turn into like a real, like a career type of situation. She's, her and her husband are very successful with their window cleaning. That's awesome. Mm-hmm. Yeah, because I saw them cleaning your windows Nice people too. So Yeah, I saw them cleaning the windows. Oh yeah. Yeah. When I was watching Nick and the black belts and Calvin roll and she pulled up and I'm like, I think you used to own this place. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. I don't remember what it was called. I can't, I can't recall, but Yeah. Yeah. But the new place, um, I don't know if I can talk about that in much, but like, it just needed a lot. Of work. Yeah. Like tiles were falling from the ceiling, from like water damage and there was like random electrical boxes, just like out exposed places. And thank God, you know an electrician. Yeah, I know Robin's like, I gotta get up there and straighten all these lights. And in this like, I don't know how tall the ceiling is, 20 feet ceiling. I don't know. I have no idea. But you, I was like, whew. Okay. Scary. But yeah, so a lot of stuff, a lot of painting, a lot of like, and he did all the painting himself? Yeah, he did. Which now he has to repaint because of like this new, those visitors, they're, we're looking at some like new affiliation team. Mm-hmm. Stuff. And so, yeah, they just have, I don't know, Calvin and I have a very different view of like, I don't wanna say it like that'cause that's not really the case. I just don't really like white.'cause it hurts my eyes. It's too bright. So I like when things are darker and like in Jiujitsu everything is white. I know. I don't, the mats are white. The walls are white. And I feel like with white you can see so many flaws. Yeah. Especially when like, and like dust, they just got done rolling. Yeah. You're beat up, you're sweaty, you may be bloody, you've got scratches, you've got bruises. Yeah. And I feel like that's all people see is just your face and how scratched up you are. Right. And I just, it's not really, so we had decided to paint a black and do all this stuff and then we talked with these, or Calvin talked with these people and they were like, oh no, no white. Gotta do it all white. And so every like, almost everything was painted black and now he has to go back through and paint everything white. So. Well I like accent walls too. I do too. Yeah. Can he do an accent? I don't think so. I don't think so. Oh my god. I mean, maybe so like we'll have, I'll have to show you it at some point, but like we're talking about putting lockers on the very back wall that's by the bathroom. Oh, nice. Like a changing room area. So what would actually be seen is like very small. Mm-hmm. So potentially like gray is something that they were okay with. I don't know if he really, he probably just wants to keep it all one color, so whatever. It's his thing and that's totally fine. Yeah. So I was telling him, actually this morning, right before I left, he was calling me spoiled and I was like, bro, you are spoiled too. I literally, like, we put our house as collateral so that you could buy this business. Like you do whatever you want. Mm-hmm. You go hang out whenever you want. You do all these, like, don't tell me that I'm spoiled and then not recognize that you're also spoiled. Yeah. So, yeah. Yeah. We're still, yeah. Makes like we say the same thing. Mm-hmm. And I'm like, you're, you spoil yourself just as much, right? Yeah. So, yeah, it was, yeah, like I never tell you no. Well, I do sometimes when it's like crazy stuff when he wants to buy things, but for the most part, like, come on. So, yeah. Yeah. And he said he wanted to open close to Thanksgiving, which is like next week. Oh, that's when he said it could be done, but now with the whole paint job. Yeah. See, and so we had ordered black wall mats to go with the black walls. Oh shit. And so, luckily they actually hadn't arrived when the floor mats arrived. And so this affiliate guy has a really good relationship with the mat company that we had bought from. Um, and so he just called the guy directly and was like, Hey, um, I need you to cancel this order and replace it with this other, this other thing instead. And he's just like, okay. Oh my gosh. So, I don't know. I guess, I mean, like, that's good. So yeah, they seem to be well connected because they apparently have like a pretty large network of like very successful gyms, world championship to jiujitsu they to be like, if you're gonna be that successful gym mm-hmm. Everybody's gotta know you. The mat company? Yes. The, the geese. The no GE for sure. Yeah. Mouth guard people. I don't know. Mm-hmm.'cause you, you're probably gonna order through them so much, much. Oh, a hundred percent. And it's like bulk stuff obviously too. So and so, yeah, put some on the map. Get me connected to your CEO. I know, right? Get me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Which is pretty crazy. So, uh, he seemed really nice. He did seem nice. Yeah. I don't know if we can tell tell his name or anything, but he seems really nice. He seems like a down to earth for the most part guy. It seems like we have similar values and like wants out of juujitsu and stuff like that, so Yeah. And I kinda like that. Yeah, because I felt like the last person he just, it was kind of all about him and everybody just like sucked into him.'cause Yeah, I think it was just like totally a profess personality. Clashes. Yeah. Like personality wise, I think they're just different and like. Calvin is a much more personal relationship kind of person. Like he loves to have good relationships with people. I feel like Calvin's love language is like, it's same like me. Mm-hmm. I love to shit on people. Mm-hmm. And if you can take it like, then you just like, are like friends for life type of thing. Yes. Yeah. And I'm, but like I tell people, I'm like, my love language is like talking shit. Mm-hmm. And if you can hit it back at me, is that like comradery? Yeah. That's just my thing. Yeah. And Calvin was doing it with the banter, these guys. Mm-hmm. And you know, they're laughing and mm-hmm. I'm like, oh, this is so different. Yeah. Like, I feel like Calvin would have never said that to the last professor. Yeah. Which also I feel like is stressful in itself when you feel like you can't yourself, you can't be yourself yourself and like open up about things and there's no like space for that. Mm-hmm. So I think like in a business relationship there's definitely spaces that it's more appropriate obviously to be able to Yeah. Like have a business conversation. But I don't know, like it just. Feels good to be able to have like a personal connection as well, so, mm-hmm. I think this is good in that regard. So yeah. So I'm hoping for all the things. Yeah. With this new gym. I hope so. New affiliate and everything. Yeah. Hoping like for some pretty heavy like growth opportunities. That'd be great. I know. Yeah, because just like for the legacy of it even, you know, to like have something that's like special like that here would be great. So, yeah. Does he want a new belt? He does. That's another thing that he was sort of, I had talked to him about it a lot in the past because I was like, Kelvin, you work so hard. I know you've dedicated so much time, so much money, so much of your like space to jujitsu and to these people and like this community. And I feel like, like the return on that in terms of like, are, do, do people see your growth, your personal growth? Mm-hmm. With your skills? I feel like it just wasn't really there. So I think they do, but yeah, the belt. Jujitsu. It's so important. It is. Yeah. Or Nick was always just like, it's like getting a black belt is like getting close to a doctorate degree. Yep. And I'm like, really? Yes. How long does it take to get a doctorate degree? Uh, well it depends. Like altogether, I thought you had to do like eight or something years of like school? Yeah. Of college. And then you have like four years of residency and stuff like that. So it's more, I was thinking like 12 years to get a doctorate and Nick was like, that's about the length of getting a black belt. Yeah. Potentially. Yeah. And this black belt, um, not the main professor, but like his partner. Mm-hmm. He is a black, he's a black belt. Yeah, I think so. Yeah. And I was like, Hey, how long did it take you to get a black belt?'cause he's my age. Mm-hmm. He's like six years. Mm-hmm. And I'm like. Which, that's what I'm saying is like if you put in the time and the dedication, and he did, and you train every day, he's not married. No kids train every single day. Yeah. Like, it makes sense that you would, because you're not, it's not like a weekend kind of thing. No. Mm-hmm. This guy lives and breathes it. Yep. His ears definitely show it. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. And I'm just like, I'm just so used to Nick and Calvin, you know, they have waited, who have like full-time jobs that are regular stuff. Mm-hmm. And then they can do it like in the evenings. Yeah. And weekends, like mm-hmm. Mess around and do it then. But yeah. So I'm hoping,'cause it'll just make Nick just so happy if he gets a round belt. I know, I know Calvin too. I'm like, you deserve it. And then I was gonna, it's been a long time everyone on the roll on the mat rolling last night. Mm-hmm. And I'm like, you deserve a blue belt. You deserve a purple belt. You deserve, you know? Yeah, for sure. I think everyone needs, I it would, it would motivate the gym so much. Yeah. There's, there was definitely some missed opportunities with the previous affiliate just in terms of like. How often we could see them, how often they could see us, and just, I think the commitment, the commitment level to like the success of the individuals, I think on our team. Yeah. So hopefully this will be, it'll motivate everyone, like more cohesive and more Yeah. Motivate everyone into the new belt and the new gym. Yeah. And then everyone's spirits are up. Yeah, I think so. I hope so. Well, uh, we, our guest has joined us. Yes. I just woke up. He, he was, he was a sleepy baby. We've been doing a lot though, so Dude, I thought we were just talking about that was gonna be up for this and he's just like snoring away, huh? Hannah? I gotta go. Yeah, that's how he sounds. He does sound like that. That was pretty good, honestly. Hannah, go talk to Zach. Do you wanna tell us who you are? My name's Zachary Bell. Thank you so much for having me here. You're welcome. Do you like to just be called Zachary? Um, that's gonna be called Zed. No, I don't like Called what? No, don't do that. Zed. Like the, um, uh, the band, the, the DJ guy? Mm-hmm. Oh, well that's cool in that case. Yeah. Oh my God. That's like a cool, yeah, no, um, it's like a, when I was in business school, someone told me to always say your full name so they don't forget who you are. Oh. So I just always say it. Anytime someone introduces their name, it goes over my head. Oh, same. Yeah. I need to do the, I do Faces, the parks and rec guy. Um, that sexy guy. Oh, the one, oh my gosh, what's his name? The one Rob Lowe. Jerry. Oh. Well, Rob, Rob Lowe's character on Parks and Rec. Anytime someone said their name, they'd be like, hi, my name is, and he would look them in the eye and repeat it back to them. Exactly. And hold serious eye contact. Oh, creepy. And they're like, why do you do that? And he's like, so I never forget their name. Mm. And I'm like, I honestly need to do that. I still forget. I forget. Mm-hmm. I never forget a face though. Very good with faces. No, I don't think you're supposed to know as many people as we do. That's probably true. I think like one 50. Really? The cap. And like I've, I've blown past that. Yeah. I think I have like over like 3000 contacts in my phone. It's, that's it's way too much. I feel like when I get a certain way of like too many people on Facebook that I'm like, okay, I need to go on call and just like delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, send. There's people I don't care about. Sorry, that's rude. But like, I don't know you really? So let's name them right now. Oh, they probably would never know. No. Like I never post, I never know. I noticed everything. Yeah, she does. Do you? And I'm like, she's got the eyes. I'm missing a follower. And then I'm like, oh, who the hell related me? So then you're like looking through and you're like, it's Sam. Yep. Yeah. That's funny. That's so Hannah. That is very Hannah. It's a flaw. Is it? I feel like sometimes it's good. Maybe. Yeah, depending. She's a great sleuth. We live a little FBI. Oh, sleuth. I was like, whoa. Sleuth. It's really early. Sorry. Open your ears. Zachary Bow. Yes, ma'am. Yes ma'am. Sorry. I'm sorry. Sorry. So Zachary, our podcast is called 30 Crank and Trying. Mm-hmm. Are you 38? Oh shoot. You're almost in the forties. Oh, brother, take me out. Back. Put me down. I think most of our, yeah. Uh, female audience, they would love to know your background except for Cody and Nathan. Cody Nathan. Oh yeah. I Listen. Just start from the top. Yeah, start from the top. Let's do childhood. When you were born, how many pounds were you? How many ounces? It's, this is interesting because you don't. I thought you came from a well-rounded family. Mm-hmm. You came from like this, you know, you had great parents. And I'm like, that's why he's so funny. So I That's a defense mechanism for us people with trauma. No, I'm a, I'm a, yeah. I'm a, I'm a real child of trauma. Yeah. And I, when you would tell your stories, I'm like, yeah, I really had no idea. Thank you. Like they say, like the happiest people come from like the worst, the worst situations, backgrounds, yeah. Yeah. But they just make, uh, make the best of things and they come out of it. Yeah. And then they turn into Zachary Bell. Yeah. Zachary Bell. Yeah. No, I mean, yeah. But life was really rough for me for a long time. Um, I was born in Memphis, Tennessee. Um, no accent really? Yeah. I mean, not really, but the accent in Memphis isn't really what people think it is. Oh, okay. It's more like dirty south as opposed Oh yeah. It's more like. Urban is probably the best way to describe it. Okay. Interesting. Um, like this, the typical southern accent like that people really think about is like more in like Alabama. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Georgia type, Georgia. Georgia, like, uh, east Tennessee a little bit, but like, like in that the mid south, like, you know, north Mississippi area, uh, Memphis area where I, where I grew up, it's kind of like more like slang almost, is the best way to describe it. Um, but yeah. Uh, what's the best way to get into it without getting too into it the longest? Can you just give us, give us it all, uh, on the baby? Uh, um, the longest short is I just came from like, poverty, uh, for like a long time. Um, my mom and dad got married when I was, when they were real young. They didn't have the best relationship. My father had a, a lot of drug and alcohol problems and, uh, that kind of plagued them their entire short marriage. Did she know that going into it? I don't really know, but most, most likely, yes. Yeah. Um. His family had drug and alcohol problems. Mm-hmm. Uh, and it's just like, I dunno, poverty's really like a disease. Mm-hmm. And, um, doesn't really have a face to it. And, you know, everyone's like, it's funny to hear people talk about like white privilege, and I know it does exist. I just, I never got a slice of that pie. Mm-hmm. Um, it'd be nice if I did Right. But, uh, it was just kind of, you know, they were, he was like a mechanic and stuff, and then like, they got separated and then my mom would just kind of bounce around different parts of Memphis. Uh, most of my life I ended up going to, uh, hang on like 12 different schools, K through 12. She was doing a little district hopping, trying, trying to like, get us to other places and stuff like that. Um, because you, she just burned a bridge with the school. Schools were really bad in Memphis, like horrible. Um. That happened a lot. Um, and then we'd like spend weekends with him. He was, you know, wasn't the best, uh, was really, really mean. Um, drinking all, all the, like, really cool things. And, uh, then we wouldn't see him around. And then he would be gone for a few years and then, so she was just kind of like looking back on, it's just probably really like shook by trauma the whole time. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And was like way in over her head and had no real abilities to parent. Mm-hmm. And it was just you and your brother? Just me and my brother. And like, I was like looking out for my brother, providing for him. Do you guys have a good relationship, you and your brother? No, we don't. That's a shame. Um, you always hope that you come out of that like, sort of trauma bonded to your like sibling or whatever. Yeah. I mean we, we, when I joined the Marines and stuff, we kind of had like a, a separation and stuff and I don't really wanna go into that. Yeah, yeah. The long and short of it is like, he felt differently about some things that just they're not true. And then like, there's what happened and, um. You know, like I, it was just like very, very young age. I was like the man of the house and having to do stuff that I, I should have never done. Like, I think I was like 10 when I started like doing like laundry and stuff. Mm-hmm. And like looking out for him and like learning how to like, you know, take care of him and stuff. And like, we were like poor, like on meal plans, poor at school and stuff. So, and my grandmother sometimes would take us to, to school and she'd be like, you know, what's your social security number? And she would like, tell us to memorize it. Mm. Because that was how we would eat. And I'd be like, B pop, BB pop. B pop. And so like, if we didn't know it, we couldn't eat at school before school. During school or after school. Mm-hmm. That's kind of a lot for a kid to know that number Well, but we made it like a game. She's like, oh, I should know. I'd be like, oh. And I didn't, I didn't know what it meant forever. I thought everyone had like a number. What they do. I didn't, I didn't know why we had ours. Um, and then one, I think it was third grade. Yeah, it was third grade. Ms. Penny Baker, like put her hand on my shoulder. Really nice. Teacher only, cool teacher I ever had taught me how to write cursive. Found out I needed glasses, all these things. And she was like, you need to tell your mom and your grandmother that when they're not gonna have before school meals anymore and you need to make plans. And I was just like, okay, thank you Miss Pennyback here. And then like, she didn't talk to anyone else in the class and I was like, oh no, I'm poor. That's like those moments where you really figure out how poo life is sometimes. Yeah. Yeah. And there would, there and there's like little moments that stuff like that would happen. Mm-hmm. Um, and you'll just look back and be like, oh yeah, that was weird. Because you don't realize how normal it is or how like not normal it is when you're in that situation. Probably. Yeah. Especially with school lunches. I don't know how your school did it, but like everyone in my classroom was getting slips and I was just always waiting for my slip and I never got one. What does that mean? We had lunch cards. I don't know what slips. Well, so did we, but when your balance was getting low Oh, the teacher would handle a slip to give to your parents. I see. Oh, that's kind of shameful. How else do you do it? Like send an email home. I don't know. One they got in trouble, but they were writing on the kids' arms, like, hey, lunch balance is low. Pay it. They got in trouble. They just, they just email. Like the girls when they were on, when we were buying'em, school lunches, they would just email us. Yeah. Or like text Christie and stuff like that. Mm-hmm. But yeah, no, it was Miss Penny Baker. And, and then,'cause like we would go to school at like, I dunno if when's elementary school start now? Seven, eight, bro. No, it starts in kindergarten when you're five. No. Well, like what time does it start? Elementary school. Oh. Oh, I see. Ours is like eight 15. Yeah. Mine's eight 30. So get there at like seven. The lights aren't even on yet at the school. Yeah. And like we would go in the cafeteria and the lunch ladies would have like french toast sticks, yeah. Mm-hmm. And stuff. So it was like, I was at school for like. An absurd amount of time. Yeah. That's like free babysitting right there for Yeah, that's, yeah. Well, that's the way she used it. Yeah. Yeah. And then she would like work bartending and stuff in multiple different restaurants was in like commercials and all these different things. She was like, she was in commercials. Yeah. She's in a commercial for a Dang, that's kind of cool. I didn't like it. Uh, she was in a com because it was my mom and she was like in a commercial for a casino. Oh yeah. Okay. And I was just like, who's that guy next to my mom? But, um, so like all, she did like all these things to try to provide for us, but life was just hard. Mm-hmm. I, I don't like to, I'm trying to think of the best way to say it. Like, it was just, there's just like a low level of anxiety all the time. Like, um, we were very, very unstable for many, many years. Mm-hmm. My mom eventually met my stepdad when I was like 10. And he's a very successful businessman that got, like, our life got a lot different after that, but by that time I was like, set in stone. Like it didn't, it didn't really matter. Yeah. Because I was, you know, that's not my money. That's, or. His life, that's his success, you know? Yeah. I was just kind of like a rap scallion. Yeah. You're like on the coattails, you're just like dangling along kind of. Yeah. I mean, I got suspended a lot from schools. I was fighting. I would, you know, I would, uh, vandalize things. I was Oh, naughty. Yeah. I was acting out a little bit. Um, act Out. It's a call for help. Yeah. But it's hard. Sadly, society is like, no one cared, Nope. Bad person forever. You're never gonna be anything. You know? I had a DHD and like no one knew what that was. They'd just be like, sit down. I'd be like, all right, I'm gonna stand up. Yeah. That really, that's really come out a DH adhd. Mm-hmm. And all that. Mm-hmm. They, they had no idea? No. They, they were just like, sit down. Okay. Did they try to medicate you? Um, there was like, I went to the doctor once and my mom didn't wanna do it, but I wouldn't have taken it anyways. Okay.'cause I knew some kids that were on Ritalin at the time was just like version one of those drugs. Mm-hmm. And they didn't seem okay. Mm-hmm. I mean. It wasn't like really bad, it was just like, I don't know. My brother got bullied once and then I beat up the bully that bullied him and then that was a thing. And then I found spray paint, spray paint a bunch of trash cans behind the school. Um, I remember they brought me in when they told me they couldn't spank you anymore. What schools used to be able to spank you, bro, we're not that much younger than you. And I feel like that's like, we're don. It is crazy. I would put people through walls if they touched my children, like so what the heck? Uh, but yeah, they brought me in and they're like, we can't spank you anymore. You gotta go home. Holy cow. Mm-hmm. Yeah. It was like the day the rule happened as I remember it. Wow. Because this one principal was like, I can't spank you anymore. You gotta go home. And I was like, no. Spank you with his hand? No, he had a paddle. Oh my gosh. And I was like, no, no, no. Just spank me. I don't want to go home. They're gonna be way more pissed about this, know? Yeah. Because yeah, damnit. Yeah.'cause it stops him at work and stuff. Yeah.'cause you learn that when you get older, you're like, oh, school's just daycare. Mm-hmm. So. Yeah. So life life was hard for a long, long time. Yeah. Until it wasn't, was basically my way of dealing with it, looking back on it, was that like, I viewed my life until I was 18 as like I was in a car, but I wasn't driving. Mm-hmm. And then once I became 18, I was like, I'll take it over then. Mm-hmm. And so like, that was like literally how I viewed it to cope with it, because I had no control over anything. Mm-hmm. Um, I had no real guidance. No one really knows what to do. Um, and there were like ideas of ways to like change your life in better position, but I didn't know anyone who made like over$40,000 a year. Realistically other, I mean my stepdad did, but like, that was like one guy. But like, there, there was no way to get out of the cycle we were in. Like, I know how to be poor, I'm really good at being poor. Mm-hmm. I'm great at it. Um, you know, like my uncles would teach me stuff about how to steal from Walmart and things like that. You ever heard of that? Oh gosh, no. Nick's dad knows how to do this. Oh, it's one of the things we bonded over. Yeah. I was always, like I said, I didn't know that background of yours. Mm-hmm. And like, I know how Nick grew up. Yeah. And then when you were like, oh no, me, that's why me, Nick, a friend, bonded over this. Like, oh, did you steal from restaurants for toilet paper? Me too. Yeah. When? Yeah. Well, at Walmart you could, uh, so one of the, one of the best ways to like get it, you don't want to go too high, you don't wanna go too low, but you go through a receipt out of a trash can or just wait. And honestly, you would look for women usually to throw away receipts of like, lots of stuff at Walmart. And then you would take the receipt and you look at it and get like a few of the ticket items on there, like$20 a year, 40, 50, whatever. And at this time you could take the receipt, go back in the store, grab the item off the shelf, give it back to them, and be like, here's my receipt. And they would give you cash. Dang. Why would they give you cash for a re, for like, oh, I see. Because I have the receipt. You're gonna customer service. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm like, oh, no, I need to return this stuff. And, uh, I do not advise this. I have not done this, allegedly. Mm. I don't think that they give you cash back for like, debit purchases and stuff. They don't. They don't anymore. Yeah, they don't anymore. Back in the day, this is like, this was the nineties allegedly. Mm-hmm. And, um, like that was kind of, that's kind of the best example of like, just my life at the time. Yeah. Was like, you know, my uncles and stuff were, were telling us things like this and Yeah. You know, there was just, I don't know. There, yeah. I think about it a lot now. So I'm, I'm just like, I'm like at cheer practices and stuff with my daughters and my uncles were like, one of'em was in and out in jail. Like, you know, like, like, could you imagine my uncles being here? Yeah. No. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Like, I think about you telling the boys, like, uncle Zach's not here. He is. He's up in the big house, you know, doing time. You know? Ooh. Oh God. A but my life was kind of like that until I enlisted it in the Marines and yeah. So what got you, um, did, were you poached? No, not really. Oh, you was like, sign me up buddy. Hear the commercial and be like, that's what I wanna do. Heck yeah. I just looked in the mirror and I go, that's a hero. Um, you know, my, my cousin who joined the Marines about four years to the, he's about four years older than me and his, his mother, my aunt, basically the same thing. He just lived in like North Mississippi, in Tupelo, Mississippi, which is where Elvis was born. That's cool. So I would spend my summers down there with him and we'd go to like vacation Bible school and stuff like that. And he got a car first and all these things. But like, I saw his life like instantly change. Like he went from living hand to mouth to having like a house on base and money, you know, not, not a lot of money, but like money. Mm-hmm. A job. Mm-hmm. Security and like the one thing neither of us have ever have ever had. And so I was like, so that was kind of nice. Probably leaving your mom going to visit him. Mm-hmm. Yeah. I mean, she would just dump us off realistically, but it was like the whole summer. Oh, Jesus. Yeah. I couldn't imagine being away from my daughters that long. Yeah. Um, I know you get sad like one night when they're at my mom's or something. Mm-hmm. I miss him. Mm-hmm. She did not feel that way. Yeah. And um, so we would go down there and like, we would just hang and then like, we were even wilder there.'cause it's a small town in north Mississippi. You know, it was fun though. Um, I was a bad kid. I, I can't stress this. Oh jeez. Don't, don't be, I wasn't like mean. It was just, I, I don't know. We were just doing stuff like we'd have What else do you do except naughty stuff when you have nothing else to do kind of situation. Yeah. I mean, yeah. And we would have like bottle rocket wars and stuff and then, you know, people would get mad at us, but I don't know, I don't wanna go into any details, but like. It changed his life and I saw that and I wanted to serve my country. Nine 11 happened when I was in eighth grade and uh, it just seemed like he had become something different. And so I was like, it left like a real mark on my, my life. My, my other uncle also served in the first Gulf four. It changed his life too. So, but like, I was like younger and I didn't really have, uh, like a real understanding of like how cra crazy it was for him. Like he went from being a guy who was like really in a lot of trouble to like, he's like a surgeon somewhere in Virginia now. He's like the head of surgery. A you and I hospitals. Geez. Yeah. So like, I didn't know much, but I knew if we join, things get better. Mm-hmm. So, um, do I have my milk mustache for my protein? No. Yeah. Fruity Pebbles flavor. That's bonkers. It's so good. It's so good. You should get one. I'll get you. You don't like Fruity Pebbles? I just, or protein. I do like protein. I don't it ta it tastes like the bowl after the cereal. Like if I'm, I don't really like that. If I'm gonna have like a sugary drink, I'm gonna get myself a Dr. Pepper. This has no, or a sweet tea. This has no sugar. One gram of sugar. Yeah, but what else is there? Is it like ose, aspartame? Like, no, it just says cool shit on this side. It definitely says super. I know. Says Superlo for sure. I'm not gonna mispronounce those words. Lina publicly. No, it says Selena on it. I don't know. I made that up, but he did that and so I was like, this is what we do. Like I'll be the next one to do it. And so I. I was dating my wife Christie at the time, and I was like, Hey, I wanna join the Marines. And she's like, I think you do it. And so I did. Wow. I love a supportive lady. Yeah. Yeah. She's 10 toes standing. She's as bad as they come. Cool. She's the bad as them all. She's very cool. Yeah. I love her wife. She's way cooler than me. Way cooler than me. She just doesn't talk about it as much or seek tension. She's humble. We appreciate that. Well, she had a loving family, I think is really what it came down to. I see. So I'm looking, I'm seeking outward validation always. She's just like, is very secure in herself. Um, but yeah, I, I joined and did she know what, uh, you know, you're getting yourself into that. You're gonna be gone for so long. Did she know that? I mean, her cousin had joined and Okay. And, um, that's how we met. We met at like a, a party for him. Uh, he, I had picked him up and I'd known him forever and I was like, Hey, it's kind of. I would like crash with his family every now and then. And they were like really good Christian people that would like take me in because it was like a, I was like a dog that slept outside. And um, I went to go pick up Luke from the airport, her cousin, it was like this big surprise. Her dad's her uncle's 50th birthday. And I brought him in. He was like in a, in his outfit and he was getting ready to, to redeploy, to Iraq and everyone was there. And I was like, oh, hey, it's great. It was really cool. And I walked in and I saw this girl across the room and I was like, sh yo Luke, who's that girl? And he's like, oh, it's my cousin Christie. And I go, your cousin Christie. She's about to be my wife. What are we talking about here? He goes, yeah, she lives in Nashville. Cousin Chrissy lives in Nashville. He goes, yeah, we've never talked about cousin Chrissy lives in Nashville. What's that about? He's like, ah, you weren't ready. And I was like, eh, you're probably right. I tell you what though. I'm gonna marry that girl. And then I walked across over there, had top level game, like ridiculous game. She didn't swing at a single pitch, she did not care that I existed. So then the outcome became quickly, I need to settle on something. And settling was, I just need to get this girl's number. Like I just need to, I need to get her number. She doesn't care about me. Got the number. A few weeks later we started dating and boom, that was it. So really, she's the one who turned your life around? No. Yeah. Like, I have to have this girl, I have to be awesome.'cause this girl is awesome. I've to have to be on the same level. I impress. Yeah. I've got to impress her. Yeah. Mm-hmm. That's cool. But yeah, we, we had kind of idea of what we're doing, but not really, you know? Yeah. Um, and then we just kind of started the adventure. Not long after that, we, uh, we, we were married and I enlisted and then I did all the training. Uh, I mean, I did all the training. Then we got married and then we, we started to plan a wedding, but she, uh, we got lucky and we were able, uh, to conceive our first child, my oldest daughter. And, um, at the time they were like, you're not going to. Afghanistan or anywhere you go into, it's called a a mu, a Marine Expeditionary Unit. So it's like a training mission. Mm. Peacekeeping operations, realistically is how they refer to it. Like you're just on like a, you're just like a big base that kind of floats around and looks for things to respond to. And, uh, I was like, cool, I'll be home. We'll do a wedding. That, that changed. Ended up going to Afghanistan in March of 2008, and that was basically like two days after, uh, my daughter was born. Mm. I won't give the exact date, but like, it was around that time basically. Yeah. You weren't there for her pregnancies, right? Um, her, I was like in and out For the first pregnancy? No, for her delivery. Oh. Not, uh, I was there for her, for my first daughter being born. Yes. Okay. Um, but like the pregnancy, I was like there for some of it, there was like training that would happen or like stuff like that. And then she went home a lot because like I'm, I'm gone for like. Two to three weeks, sometimes or a week. Or if I'm gone for this amount of time, I'll be gone for like, we are just training all the time. And um, you know, we lived in a very, very small duplex apartment, but like, we were happy. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. We had furniture. Our furniture was like second hand. Second hand. Yeah. We might have stolen cable, you know, like we were, we were just making it. But like, I don't know. It was very, we were very, very happy. Both of us. I know.'cause like we had like, nothing. The only, the only complaint I had is she, I had to move the laundry downstairs'cause she kept trying to carry it upstairs when she was pregnant. And I was like, you can't do this. You're pregnant. Oh. So like, that was the only thing I was like, I wish, you know, you stopped doing that because she would always, our rooms were upstairs and everything and so she'd always like, carry the laundry upstairs. I'm like, I'll do that. Let me do that when I come home. But it was, it was a great time in our lives, honestly. We were poor though. Like really like, uh, I don't know if we're gonna make it type stuff for a little bit, but we had just enough money each month and we would save and put away and not mess up. And it was, it was fun. I don't know, didn't, I don't know. Sometimes you don't really know how chaotic things are. Mm-hmm. And it was kind of like that. But for me, my mission was like, I'm going to deploy. I have to focus on that and I have to focus on her. And everything else kind of fell by the wayside. Yeah. Dang. But I left and deployed and I didn't call home for like 90 days. Ooh. Yeah. And then she would get updates how the deployment was going. That one was, it was pretty Did you guys write letters? I did write letters, yep. I did write letters to her. That's so like 1950s. Nick and I did letters. That's cute. I still have'em. Let's read. That's really sweet. In like a shoebox in the closet. Yeah. Cute. Yeah. Let's read them right. Let's read them right now. Oh, it's probably like I miss your big. Boobs or something, basically. I don't know. I dunno. Basically it's not, it's not like, like every war, like documentary, you hear like a letter and it's like, dearest Christy, how I long for your touch? I'm like, like those are made up. Like guys are like, damn, girl, I miss that ass. Like that's real. Like no one ever talked like that. So, um, but yeah, we would write letters and, um, the mail's pretty delayed and she would like always like, and like every single month send a package for me or someone who didn't have mail. A lot of people didn't get mail. She like looked out for a lot of my friends. That's nice. Yeah. That's nice. And so like, we, we like did that and like, it, it, we, I don't know. It, it was like working and then I came home. After seven months and you know, I had this child and I was like, this is pretty easy. I don't know what she's talking about. Did you bond pretty well with her? Yes. Yeah. Because I know even like some guys that don't deploy, they have a hard time bonding with like Yeah. Kelvin had a hard time. Yeah. Like with our second, oh, with our first Oh, really, really breastfed baby. They just want mom. Mm-hmm. Care less about anyone else. Mm-hmm. Interesting. Yeah. A lot of dads had to deal with that. The ones that I've talked to, they're like, I didn't bond with my child for a long because they just wanted mom. Yeah. Mom. Her boob, her milk, her body. Yep. Yeah. No, I came home and I was just like, you're mine now. Like I, I would like take her to do everything with me. Protective. Yeah. I was like, come here, you And, um, I was real, I don't wanna say aggressive, but that's the only word I can think of right now. I was like, I want to be in her life as much as possible. Mm-hmm. Like, I've never treated her like she was. Anything other than a gift. A gift. And she's like my daughter. Mm-hmm. I didn't wanna be like, oh, she's a girl and she can't do that. And like, you know, I'm like, that's my kid, dude. Don't talk about my daughter like that. I've literally killed people to see her. You mean nothing to me. So like, it was just like, I just wanted to be there with her. But I, I, I know I got lucky, both of them. I, I don't know, I guess they're amazing. Christie really did a lot of stuff to like, you know, keep like, uh, photos and stuff of me around mm-hmm. And different things like that to kind of like, develop that too. So that helped a lot. But, um, my second daughter, uh, they told us we were going to Iraq for like, 90 days is when they were shutting down bases. And so we were gonna like, basically backfill and do security as like, they shut down bases as we began to withdraw from Iraq. Mm-hmm. And that was like maybe 90 days, maybe one 20, no big deal. And I was like, cool. And so we started, um, trying to plan our second child and then. We got lucky and Christy got pregnant and at the last minute they're like, you're not going to Iraq, you're going to another part of Afghanistan. No one's been there before. And I was like, that sucks. Mm-hmm. And they're like, oh yeah, and you have like 30 days. They basically like rushed to the appointment at the last minute. It was the troop search in Afghanistan and like late 2009, 2010. And so we had like 30 days to get everything done when like usually you have like months to plan all of that. And she was about a month out from having our second child. And like I found out that happened like, uh uh, the same day as a bunch of firefights happened. So yeah. Dang. So you missed that birth completely. Missed it completely. Uh, she was with her mom though, so that was Oh, okay. Yeah. She, she had someone, yeah, she's with her mom. You know, her, my mother-in-law is always taking very good care of my family. Like, she like rearranged her whole life several, several times for us. Mm-hmm. And so they were there, and the day it happened, I was like, out, don't a patrol. And I had a, I had a French reporter with me and I was really upset about that because like, reporters are, they're never paying attention. They're, they're just like a security hazard. Mm-hmm. And, um, I get in a firefight and this guy just drops, he just goes flat, like, like a pancake, a crepe. And like, we're in the middle of a field and I'm like, we've gotta go, we've gotta go. Like, I'm literally like shooting off rounds to move to a, a different area. And he's like, no, no, no, I'm scared. And I'm like, I know you're scared, you're French and weak, but we gotta go, we gotta, we gotta, we gotta move, man. And he, he would not move. And his photographer's starting to listen, but he's not moving. So I grab him by the back of his flack and, and I pull him and we get to cover. And then eventually we get to another spot and we continue the patrol, and then we go back, we get back and he's like, oh, miss you. Thank you so much. You saved my life. That's a good accent. Yeah. It's, I just gotta think of a weak man. You can pull it off. Yeah. He's like, you saved my life and I'm so grateful. And I was like, yeah, that's, that's awesome. I was like, well, here's the thing, jock, do that again. You know, that was really scary. But he's like, well, if you ever need anything from me, you let me know. And I go, matter of fact, I need some help. What de you need? I will help you. And I was like, well, my daughter, I don't know if she's been born yet, but my wife's back home. She's pregnant, and I think she's been born by now. And I know you're a reporter from the Associated Press. I hope I meet him. Actually. Um, you're sort of a reporter from the Associated Press. They sent you out here, you gotta have a cell phone. I need to borrow your cell phone. And he's like, my cell phone. And I was like, yeah, I need to borrow your cell phone. And he's like, we, he's like, I don't have one. And, uh, he's like, miss Sue, ed, don't have a cell phone. I goes, you don't have a cell phone? He goes, we, I go, okay. Okay. Can I swear? Yeah. You know, I was like, here's the deal, jock. You either gimme your cell phone or I swear to God, I'm gonna take you back out there. No one's gonna stop me and no one's gonna find you. And like, he looks at me, and by this point all my marines are like all around me, and they're like cracking their knuckles. They're like cold. Oh gosh. They're, they're like, we'll do it Frenchy. Like, they don't, they don't care. Like, we'll take you out back. And he's like starting to really read the room. And then he opens up his flag jacket, gives me his phone. Oh my gosh. And he goes, why would he lie about that? Yeah. Because he's a French coward. And um, he goes, America's country code is zero one. And I grab it and I go, God damn right it is. So I just dial Chrissy's phone number and I call her. And literally like there was explosions and stuff happening. Oh my gosh. At the same time. And I was like, Hey, how are you? And she's like, she's beautiful. She's born. I was like, okay, I love you so much. I'll be home soon, I promise. Oh, that's sweet. You're gonna make me cry a little bit. Yeah. I was like, I'll be home soon, I promise. I was like, don't call this phone again. It belongs to a French reporter. And so, and he's a weenie. Yeah. I was really upset. Long story short, don't take a life debt from the French, it means nothing to them. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I can't stress how bad his life would've been had I not pulled him to safety. Mm. No kidding. But then I turned around and I told my friends, I was like, she's a girl. And like, everyone's like, yeah. And so it was really cool actually. Yeah. Nope. Your daughters are amazing. They, they are. They took after their mother Flux calling me. Um, no, they're, they're incredible. And so that was basically the moment I knew I wasn't gonna do the Marines anymore. Mm-hmm. Was, was, was like, there's like a lot of like little moments, but. I was, I had a very successful career. I'm actually not trying to brag for once I, I was like really good at it. I took to like a duck to water and, um, I ended up getting promoted a few times. Um, and when I ended up leaving, I was a corporal, but, um, you still have time you have to do when you, um, like when you sign up your first contract's eight years. Mm-hmm. And so I was looking at doing the reserves for a little bit too after I got off active duty. And so it was like four years of active duty. I'm an E four and then like July of 2011, they're like, Hey, you picked up Sergeant. And I'm like, that's pretty sick. So anyone doesn't know that's, there's only nine ranks in the enlisted scale. Mm-hmm. So four years I'd already hit E five. If I'd stayed in by this time, they would've had to make a new rank structure for me. Mm-hmm. Like I was, I was like aura farming out there. I was killing it. Like I was aura farming, I was maxing, what does that mean? Just being cool basically. Okay. Yeah. I was, I was maxing out the military and. I, I loved it, but it, it came at such a high cost. Yeah. Yep. And I just, there's no version where I wasn't leaving every, every year for the next 20 years and I'm like, I'm, I'm just not doing that. So mm-hmm. Came back home and moved in with my, uh, my mother-in-law. She rearranged her house and I worked construction jobs. Went to college for a little bit until I was able to get a, until I was able to get into a good school. But, uh, for like three years I would work night shift in the hospital and go to school during the day. Dang. What'd you go to school for? Yeah. Um, at the time I wanted to nursing Weird. Like Nick? Yeah. Yeah. Um, I wanted to do life flight nursing'cause I had seen a bunch of like the PJs and stuff, so like That's scary though. But I wanted to like that adrenaline rush. Are you that junky? Yeah. I wanted to help people, but I wanted it to be cool. Like I wanted to Yeah. Feel you probably would've been really good at that, just for the fact that you'd already experienced so much like blood gore, like crazy stuff. That was the idea. My friend did that kind of stuff. Mm-hmm. And she like got messed up kind of from that, from stuff that she saw. So yeah, you probably were like cool with that. Yeah, I was like, I was like, I can help people and it's on helicopters. Sign me up. Sign me up. Um, but I didn't know much about college. No one in my family had ever gone to it. I had a bad, bad semester before I enlisted. I had a 1.67. Oof. Oh yeah. And um, that was like on my transcript and I, like, no one in my family told me like, you know, you can retake that class and it'll remove from your transcript or you go talk to like, uh, what is it called? The administrators and the registrar. And you can figure out how to get that stuff taken. No, no one, no one knew that like we knew like how to melt. Plastic off of copper and to scrap, like, that was all my family knew. Like we didn't know any of those things. So it basically brought down my overall GPA to make me non-competitive in, in the nursing program.'cause I had a 4.0 when I went back, like I was crushing college. I was like, mm-hmm. I was like, dude, they tell you what they're gonna do. They have a syllabus, this is easy. And um, but I had that, that like anchor pulling me to the bottom. Mm-hmm. And so I started shifting and I was like, I, I don't know. I just wanna help people. So I started moving towards like a psychology degree and I had this idea that, you know, I would go to another school and like do like social work or something.'cause by that point I had started working with veterans or I don't know, in, in Nashville. Healthcare's a big thing. And then I got looped in with this group and they're like, listen, you should get an MBA. And I was like, why? And they're like, trust me, it's, it's good for you in the healthcare world. And I was like, okay, I'm in the healthcare world. I'll do it. And, um, again, no one, I didn't know how to apply for grad school. I just met a guy who, it was, he was their grad school recruiter, and I applied and I got in. I was like, this is sick. Like, things are going great. And then I got into grad school and I did that for another two years. And I, about May of 2016, all the goals I had set for myself, I no longer had. Mm-hmm. And that was kind of like a, a Ronin Samurai. I was a lost warrior without a tribe and nowhere to go. Mm-hmm. And I had young daughters and a gorgeous wife. And, um, I was like, where do, where do I go now? And I was like, I guess I just adult. So that's ew. Yeah. That was like, that's what I did. It's terrible. It sucked. It really sucked. I was no good at it. Yeah. I'm still not good at it like that. Well, I didn't. Fit in is probably the best way to say it.'cause you're weird. Very, I am weird. Mm-hmm. Um, but you were probably the only one with a military background. Only one with a military background. And so it was 2016, like now, people don't care about all the things that like I had to deal with. Like the, I remember I just, I was, I was starting the sleeve on my arm and like, it was, you know, everyone older than 40 was really obsessed with it and was like, I can't believe you did that, so boy. And like, you know, they, it just like, I stuck out like a sore thumb. So I had to like, wear, you know, suits and jackets and stuff all the time. And like culture was kind of like mm-hmm. Pretty anti millennial at that time in the workforce because that whole, and it's still happening now, but that whole generation's, basically it's the end of their careers. Mm-hmm. Like the boomers and stuff, it's over. Right. And to be honest, they should go, um, they have done really bad. Um, but like. Remember, like I came in and I was like talking about like PDFs and Google Docs and stuff of this. I'm like, whoa, what are you talking about? They're like in the floppy disc era. Girl. They weren't even close to that. Oh no. They would write notes down, oh no. And then they would go back and they say, then we digitize our notes. And I had just left graduate business school. I was like, there's no way on God's green Earth I'm doing that. Oh my gosh. Um, and I got pulled aside for it. They were like, you, you can't be on your computer in meetings. And I go, what are you? What are you talking about? I'm taking minutes. This was 2016. 2016. Oh, damn. Yeah, Trump had just got elected. That's bonkers. Everything, the Affordable Care Act was like going and put all these things were happening. Healthcare was really crazy at that time. But my boss time was like, you're just always on your computer. I'm like, what are you like, what are you talking about? He's like, when we're in meetings, you're just like typing away. And I go, I'm writing what you're saying, bro. Bro, I'm taking notes. He goes, how do you take notes? Oh my God. I was like on Google Docs. And he's like, what is that? What's go. He just assumed I need to explain the internet to you. I did. I literally had to explain like cloud stuff to him. They're like, where's the cloud? Is it above us? And I'm like, no, it's, it's like a server farm in most likely Utah. But like, no. Oh, lordy. And so like I had to for like one month I just scanned all the paper stuff'cause they didn't know what that meant. I had to show them how to make PDFs, all of these things. And so like I was basically dealing with that for a long time. And in Nashville, if you want to, like most companies have built in bylaws to them that say if you go from the janitor to CEO, you can only make like 10% of that next level salary. So you basically have to leave in order to get with your words. So if you're like at company a. They have an opening for you there. It's better to not take that job at company A. It's better to go to the competitor company B. Mm-hmm. And then come back in two years, you'll literally double your salary. Mm-hmm. It sucks. It's so dumb. It's the dumbest thing ever, which makes sense to me now, knowing that like when people job hop from those types of things mm-hmm. It's like, oh, that makes sense why people do that. It's like way less shady than, well, than you kind of think it is. They're just playing the system. Yeah. Because they won't, it's like anybody else. They won't promote you. I mean, they won't pay you what you're worth. Yeah. Because I remember they were like, there's an opening in one company, and they're like, yeah, we could take, basically it would double my salary. And I was like, okay, let's do that. And they're like, well, but if you get hired in an internal hire doesn't get paid the same. But I was like, why? Like, well, according to blah, blah, blah, blah. And I go, that's horrible. Let's just, I'll stop working today for a day, and then I'll come back and I'll start the new job tomorrow. And they're like, you can't do that. I was like, all right, this place sucks. Mm-hmm. So I would have to like. Changed jobs every two to three years basically. And like at that time, healthcare companies were coming and going. Mm-hmm. I was at one. It doesn't exist anymore. You know, I was, I was fine. Those, uh, it's sad, some of those people, they, they never worked again. That's sad. Yeah. Yeah. Because, because like they were undereducated by today's standards. Oh yeah. And like, they had given 20 to 30 years and believed very foolishly, very naively that the companies love them, but you know, no, they don't care. Our generation, it's a company. Gener our generation doesn't understands that, but like they, the older generation believes that Ford loves them or is not Ford. Ford's a great company, actually. Um, I know what you're saying. Insert older company here. Mm-hmm. Um, I can't stress this enough. I really like Ford. They gave a friend of mine a free truck. Um, the guy who was blowing up in the withdrawal of Afghanistan. I love Ford. They're incredible. Um. But they believe that the company loves them like a shareholder. Mm-hmm. The company loves shareholders. Mm-hmm. They don't love them. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And so I was, you're just dollar signs baby. Literally, you a cog in the machine. Yep. And but that, but that's not generation though. I know. Yeah. That's when people used to stay at the same job for 40 years. Yeah. And then they would retire and it would be whatever. Like, it's not like that anymore. No, you can't, you literally can't stay at a job for 40 years and if you believe them, like it'll only hurt you. Yep. Yes. And, um, you know, I, like, I knew a guy I helped, uh, I, I knew a guy I helped who like, who was like, kind of like trying to put me on his team. He'd even been in the military and stuff, and I found out before he did that he was getting laid off. Oh. And like I went to him and I was like, listen, don't you dare let them see you sad. I was like, you hold your head up. Mm-hmm. You wait till you get home. Mm-hmm. I'll help you carry your stuff out, but don't you dare my gosh, don't you dare let these monsters see you weak. Mm-hmm. Literally. And he was just like, mm-hmm. He didn't say much, but it was, it was rough. It was rough. Um, and you knew you couldn't stay in this environment forever. So how did that and your influence now? Yeah. What's your transitional Well, I had started like working with veterans nonprofits like pretty early on and I had done that while I was in college. Like I'd helped to pass bills with my state representative who became my congressman, who became a friend of mine. And like I had worked with veterans for a while, like in state, Tennessee. I helped lobby for a bill that got$500,000 for I think four years, uh, for, uh, mental health organizations in Tennessee. And the nonprofit I worked at got a piece of it. Mm-hmm. Um, done that and helped raise money with other organizations. Like one summer I just went around doing pushups everywhere for an organization called the Boot Campaign, raised money for them. And I just started like, kind of like helping because a lot of my friends were not in the best shape, still aren't some of them. And, uh, I just wanted to like, help and I realized that no one was gonna help us, so I'm gonna figure out the best way to help us. Mm-hmm. And then whenever I find out, I just kind of like open source and tell everyone it's a bad business model. I could probably make money doing it, but that feels gross. Yeah. So I, I just like, wanted to help my community and, um, the COVID, the pandemic, uh, COVID happened and, um, we, uh, it was pretty funny. Yeah. I wasn't sure if I caught that at person. I was like, nah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The Pangolin and the bat and the wet market, whatever that stuff happened. And, uh, so it was 2020. It was funny'cause me and Kristy had just gone to a Post Malone concert in Nashville and it was such a good show. What, what era of post was this from? Uh, Hollywood Bleeding Tour. Okay. Interesting. Hollywood was bleeding. Mm-hmm. So good. Its like, what's that? Like a third album, right? I believe so. Okay. Just crushing. Um. And so we had done that in like March and then the, like, the two week lockdown happened. Oh. So me and the girls were all there and I was still at this healthcare company doing like security at that time. But I was actively looking for something and I didn't know much. But I, without trying to sound like super weird, I knew COVID was bad because I could see it in healthcare and how it was affecting stuff. Mm-hmm. And they started having meetings at this company I was at with like the entire board and all leadership in like emergency type situations. Like at one point I was asked like how I would provide security if the entire board showed up. And I was like, that's a weird scenario. Mm-hmm. Like they're all never in the same room. Why would they all be in the same room? And like, oh, no reason. It's definitely not like a global pandemic coming. I was just like, I don't know. It just seemed weird. And um, then that's why I said der but, um,'cause they knew about it forever. That's, that's the thing. It's these companies have known for a long time all this stuff was happening, et cetera, et cetera. So, um. We were just at home for like 90 days at the, the four of us. It was awesome. We built Forts downstairs. We watched Justin Bieber's show on YouTube tv. Oh, heck yeah. Like, it was called like seasons. Um, we weren't running every day. We worked out every day. We just hung out and like really just enjoyed the time together. And it's the most time consecutively. My, my entire family's been together. Mm-hmm. And it was awesome. It was the best. And I was, COVID was a blessing. It was awesome. Mm-hmm. I know it was hard for people. It was not good for me. I, because Calvin wasn't home, so it was just me and the kids and like, we couldn't go anywhere. So that sucks. I, that's when I got fat. I'm gonna tell you that, that's when I got real fat because I'm like, we can't go anywhere. We have no schedule anyways. You had to build, you had to build a schedule. That was the thing that we like. I kind of honestly treated it like a deployment. I like locked in. I was like, Chrissy, these girls need structure. Yeah. Yeah. Because there was, there was, there was freeform and like, it was very quickly like we have to figure some stuff out and, um. I just, I fell in love. I was like, I don't wanna do this forever. I wanna spend as much time with these girls as I can. I wanna spend as much time with you as I can. Let's do that. And at the same time, everyone was online more. And I started seeing like people making like memes and stuff. And then I saw, I saw like a guy holding up a cardboard sign, and then I was like, oh, that's kind of funny. It's kinda like a homeless veteran type thing. And then I was like, I'm, I'm a veteran. It's, this is literally it. And I was just like, what? Train of thought. Huh? I wonder if I could write stuff on it and say funny things that would like make sense. And I remember I kind of like locked myself in my office for like a day and I just, I was like stuck on this idea of like, you and Nick are so weird. Yeah, I know. I was like, I was like stuck on this idea of this character. And like how he would be. And I was like, what would his name be? How would, and I was like, his name would be a war fighter. And I was like, oh, yeah, that's how he would refer to himself. Do you talk about yourself person in that way? No, just the char the character. It's just me. It's just me babbling like a moron by myself. Right. But I'm giving you both sides of my inner monologue. All right. All right. So I'm not that I am crazy, but not this level of crazy. And, um, I would just like go back and forth and be like, okay. So he would, how would he dress? Like how would he look? And then it's like, okay, he would have a hat on and he'd probably have sunglasses, but the hat would be backwards. Yeah, the hat would be backwards. Why would the hat be backwards? I don't know. It doesn't make sense. Just put the hat backwards and the sunglasses are like, yeah, he's just, it's just like a way to distance himself from everyone else. And it's like a defensive mechanism. And what would he be wearing? He'd probably be wearing, like, something that's a callback to his military service. Not a loud callback, but like, if you know, you know. Okay. Like a ski shirt. I'm like, oh, I have ski shirts. It's the undershirt. I wear the green shirt. So that's like the undershirt you wear underneath your cammies every day. Mm-hmm. And I, when I got outta the Marines, I had a bunch of them and I was like, sweet, I have gym clothes.'cause there wasn't athleisure at the time. Mm-hmm. So I was just, I wasn't going to, the gym wasn't like walking up a runway. I just grabbed something. Black shorts. I know back in the day when things weren't so styled and fashioned, no dude, not me, to this day I'll die on this hill. Black shorts, uh, a green shirt, hat, let's go. I don't have time for anything else. And so I'm like, okay. That's how I would dress. And like, okay, what would he say? How would he say things? And so I kind of built this like, character in this world and this idea around this guy. And, um, I went to this, uh, the young lady who was cutting my hair at the time and they were getting ready to close the shop. And I was like, this is March by this point. And, uh, late March. And I was like, Hey, can you, uh, can you, um, uh, take a photo of me outside real quick? I have an idea. Yeah. She's like, sure. And I was like, awesome. I told her the idea and she's like, yeah, this sounds like fun. Cool. Have fun with it. Took the photo and I was, I was her barber did that mm-hmm. Represent. Yeah. I would still go to her to this day, but she moved to a different place. Ugh. So it sucked. It sucks. But she was awesome. I hope that you pay her like a a Oh, yeah. Yeah. Find type of situation. That was, that was the time when people were like trying to do things before the shut, you know what I'm saying? Mm-hmm. The shutdown would happen. Mm-hmm. Like I, I gave her a significant tip on top of it, but like everyone was trying to do things before businesses started shuttering. Yeah. And so, um, if we had to meet in secret to do things because nobody. We knew how germs worked until 2020. Right. And then we just forgot how germs work. Mm-hmm. Um, but I just started posting me as memes and, you know, it was rough. It was really rough for a while. A lot of people talking about my body, a lot, a lot of dudes talking about my body for a long time know Oh, when you made the posts? Yeah. And then you're reading the comments in a gross way or very gross the mean way. Yeah. Mean like, look at this guy's tattoos. They're dumb. I would never dress like that. I would never like just the same person, like over and over. I don't know, just the hater. It's just weird. It's weird. But, but they, you, to me, I thought so like, like the engagement boosts your post basically. Yeah. Yeah. Which is nice, but it's also like, dude, shut up. Yeah. Like, why are you, why are you here? Yeah. Yeah. I've never commented on someone who isn't my friend. Like I, what are those tattoos? But these are like raw dog strangers have nothing to do with me. It's so weird. Like, and I don't get it. Yeah. And it's, I, this is, it wasn't bots. It was like, I don't know why he is got those tattoos. I would never do that. I didn't ask you, like, I did not ask you what you think. And so like, you get kind of down because, uh, there's just not traction or, I dunno, the tone was off. Um, but my friends liked it and, um, most people didn't get the joke, which annoyed, annoyed me to know him. Do you remember the first sign? Mm-hmm. I remember the first one that like really kind of took off. I had, I had like two, or I had one making fun of like army rangers and then one making fun of Marines. And I had started to pick up stuff, but both of'em were kind of negative based and I wasn't thrilled that I had found gold through, through negativity. Mm-hmm. Um, but there was this guy, his name's Captain Crozier, he was a commander of a ship and, uh, during COVID they responded to the stuff in New York. Camped out there, the ship did, and they were treating people and his ship was just rampant with COVID sa I mean, with COVID cases. His, all of his sailors were sick and he was trying to get resupply and support from the Navy. During that time, the Biden administration was actively suppressing how bad COVID was. Mm. Saw a fact. Don't cancel anybody. It is all true. And so he ended up leaking documents to a, B, C to try and get help.'cause like it's his job. Take care of those kids, that's what he's supposed to do. Everything. And, um, they were taking him off the ship and, uh, they relieved him his command, which is a very, very big deal. And, uh, as he was going off the ship, they were screaming, captain Crozier, captain Crozier. And the ship is just like vibrating. Mm-hmm. As like his whole command's like screaming, like how awesome he is and stuff, and like he waves to them and everything. It was a very viral clip and um, I saw it that morning. It was like May, it was May. First or April 3rd, 30 days has September. April. June. So it's April 30th. And, um, I asked Chrisy to take a photo of me as I was walking out of our house, of our, our old home. I was like, Hey, take, will you take a photo of me? I have an idea. And she's like, who's this? And I was like, oh, know, he's a cool guy. Like, like, trust me. I, I, I think he, he's a cool guy. And, um, I don't have notifications on my phone except for, uh, text and phone and no social media notifications at all. I, I don't do, oh no, I don't, I don't do any of that. And so I just, like, for a day I was really kind of disheartened and I turned off my phone basically, um, after she took the photo, after I uploaded it and kind of moved through life for 24 hours. Okay. Um, and um, the next day I opened up my phone and I scrolled Instagram and it said a hundred, a hundred, a hundred. And I was like, well, that's unusual. And then like, I scrolled it again and it said a hundred, a hundred, a hundred. And then I did it again and I said, a hundred, a hundred, a hundred. And I was like. Oh no. I was like, my, what's happening here? I look at it and I had thousands of follow, I had hundreds of followers, now I had thousands of followers, and everything was just like taking off like a rocket ship. Damn. And so I was just like, oh, I've like caught fire. And then, you know, pretty much since then I've been trying to figure out like what to do with it. And it's something me and Nick talk about now that we're already like, deep into our creator careers. Like most people don't last as long as all of us have. Mm-hmm. And so like the fact that I'm still here, like year five and like things are still growing, I'm still doing other oppor, I still have other opportunities is, is, is, um, incredible and a huge blessing that I try to be worthy of every day. But like, I could have never imagined the, the way things would happen. Mm-hmm. Like, you know, to becoming friends with like Cody and Brandon and then meeting Nick and then like, there's the Unsup stuff and. You know, it's a wild, it's a wild journey. Like sometimes I'm like, oh, okay, DC Yeah. It all feels made up. D dc and drinking at the Pentagon. Yeah. That's just a normal sentence everyone has every day. I interviewed the secretary of the va. Yeah. Like it's all kind of like, whatever. We're friends with Jocko. Like, it's all like, you know, every day is so cool. It is, it's so cool. And it's, you know, I'm very grateful for it, but like, no one more than me is like, that was crazy. Like, I, I don't, I don't get it, you know, to the point now to where I started a podcast and that one's on hold until my studio gets finished and you know, and then me and Nick had started hanging out and he was just like, we should start our podcast. And I'm like, you have like seven. Why do you wanna do another one? He's like, I don't know. I just think we should. Your nick accent. It's like, it's pretty good. I don't know. Good, good. That'll be good. Good. Mm-hmm. And so it was literally a year ago, I came up here and we were just hanging out, just kind of like feeling out each other on like a bro date. And, um, had this idea for like, let's do a podcast. And he's like, what do you wanna call it? And I was like, underwhelming. Like, I was just like, let just call it underwhelming. He was just like, good, good. We'll do that. That's, that's a high sign in Nick's culture. If you get two goods back to back, that's the highest compliment you can ever receive from him. Mm-hmm. But it was just like sticking with it and stuff. And, and you know, Nick and Nick and Cody and Brandon have probably been some of the greatest friends. Nick, Cody, Brandon, rich, Eli, all of them. They have been life changing advocates for me and my family and just everyone, honestly. Like that's, that's probably the most. Yeah.'cause I blessing. I have, I really didn't know much about you. Mm-hmm. Or like, the first time I did the range day, you know, this isn't the first time someone's greeted Nick. Like this where you jumped on Nick. Yeah. Like little baby bear. Mm-hmm. Jumping on his mother. Mm-hmm. And I'm like, yeah, that's not the first time I've seen that happen. Yeah. So I was like, who is this guy? He's like, that's fucking with a sign. Mm-hmm. And I'm like, okay. And then, um, you know, range Day was crazy and chaotic. Which one was that the first one or, um, at demos first. It was the first one at demos, right? Yes. That one was crazy. And I'm like, oh, this is a crazy world. I, and there's machine guns. Yeah. Machine guns, you know, he's doing all like the, what do you call it, the vendors? Yep. Just really getting his name out there and everything. And I'm just trying to like, who's this, who's this, who's this, who's this? And I'm just. Just taking it at awe and yeah, I just felt like the podcast idea was like, Hey, I don't really know too much about this guy, but no, you've just, you two just locked it. We get along really well. It's'cause we we're both poor whites. It's why Mike, it's why Mike likes me so much and, and Nick's mom as well. Like, I don't know. We just, we just hung around. And like, the thing is that most people don't understand is like, when I'm with Nick, Cody, Brandon and Eli, when we're together, say it's for a day, we're together 23 hours in that day. Mm-hmm. So it's like the relationship is accelerated, if that makes sense. Mm-hmm. Because if you look at it like the average time you spend with like, it's like what? Violent basically, except, you know, no one kisses the way you wish they would. Yeah. Um, not with passion. Yes. That's not with tongue. Uh, not with tongue. Literally. Like who does that? I don't know. No. But like the relationship goes like, it just like you jump a lot of stuff like really quickly. It's very, it's, it is kinda like the military. And so like when we're together, like here, we're like, we're together. The only time we've been separated is when we've slept. And then like I wake up and then I see y'all, I'll see Nick, and then we'll keep doing this stuff. Mm-hmm. And it's like that, like, so you think about like that at scale? I've been doing that for a few years now. These are the people that are most important to me in my family. Like they stay at my home when they're around. Like they're part of my lives. Like it. Oh. But that's what I was trying to get at. Yeah. So, you know, I didn't really know much about you. Mm-hmm. And then I remember the phone call you gave to Nick. Nick, I feel like I'm in trouble with the vf. The vfw. Yeah. VFW. And Nick's like, don't worry, we got you. Yeah. And I'm like, gimme the rundown. What's happening? Well, here's what happened. Yeah. And I'm like, yeah. And I, you know, he's telling me the story and I'm like, I feel like this could be a meme. This could be a Lord of the Rings thing you did. You started the memes and I took the Lord of the Ring War. The war battle scene. I think it was Twin Towers Helms Deep Helms. It said Helm, ZBAA. Is it Twin Towers? It said not two towers. It's not Twin Towers. Just the two towers. Two towers. My bad. Yeah. And, but like, I knew the scene, I knew the battle scene. I'm like, this is it. And I just felt like at that moment it was me and Brandon at the bottom. Yeah. Fighting all these ORs. And then all of a sudden the Unsub community just comes right here. Yeah. But like, that's where I felt like you were like, oh my gosh. Like you all have my back. Like, yeah. It's, you're not just a talker. Mm-hmm. Like, nope. They, they've got you. When you think that you're gonna fail, Nope. You're not gonna fail. It's incredibly rare in the creator community. It's very, it is. Because not everyone looks out for each other like that. No. And Unsub, I know why people want to be in the unsub world now because they feel like it's like touching lightning. But the reality is we're all very, very close and, um. It's just been life changing. Like I, they're the people I talk to most, they're the people that are around me the most. And so, like, when that happened, usually with controversy, people will just like jump ship, they're like out. But like, we're also all represented by the same like talent agency and stuff like that. But even still, like, that doesn't mean much. And so when the VFW was like, Zach's stealing from veterans, Zach's attacking veterans, I was like, oh dude, this is like the absolute worst. And it was all because me, Nick and Rich rejected an ad deal from them. From the vfw? From the vfw, yeah. It was not a small amount of money, it was tens of thousands of dollars and like a 90 day campaign for each of us, um, which is, you know, you're looking for like multi-month deals, you know. And so it was basically, I don't wanna give too many specifics on it, but it was, it was tens, it was thousands of dollars, multiple, tens of thousands of dollars. And even still, I was just like, I can't. I can't. I talked to Rich about it. Rich said the same thing. Nick said the same thing. I was like, all right, cool. Like,'cause like we all felt gross because they want to put a bill that will basically eliminate people being able to choose who can help veterans get their benefits claim. Mm. And I was like, nah, like I don't wanna use the government to restrict the market and movement and those things. And so we all talked about it and then we just didn't do it. And then I'm, I have the smallest following of, of them and they just like picked me and, and I understand too why they picked me.'cause like I have like this brand and this image. Like it's that guy with a sign. It's like it's easy to recreate. And so they just held up this like goofy goober looking dude. And like they can find like a jacked guy that's like works out, that's like five, seven, some would say maybe taller, you know, just looks like corrugated steel wrapped in od green. Like, you know, they didn't find that, they found like. Just this dude who's like an older veteran just like this and just like, well, you know, veteran with the signs lying about people. And I was just like, oh man, this is gonna be bad. And um, I waited for a minute, me and Nick and Rich talked and I put out a quote tweet and I remember the like,'cause like it was like the last thing I said publicly for like a week. And I was like, are you sure you guys wanna do this? Because by that time we had developed a plan and the plan was we were gonna kill'em. We were like gonna dog walk them mm-hmm. On the internet. And then Nick put up a thing of like sars eye, like looking at them and they just like, they thought they could beat us and they can't. Which is hilarious. Yeah. I've had memos leak to me and like the, the way they talk to each other about it is pretty insane. They're like, we think we're the biggest influencers online. We think we're the ones who can change this stuff. And they started pushing out talking points. These, I mean, most of'em are very old. Mm-hmm. The members, they didn't know what to do and no. Like they're in black and white. We're in hd. Like they, they didn't know like the game we were playing. And so it, it was really probably don't even know how to make a meme that quick. No, not even a chance. And then Hannah's got the memes. UBS got the memes. Um, I don't think the long and short of it is the president called me on a Wednesday. Sev, we would talk that week. He was gone by Friday. I don't know why he would tell me that if he was gone like out later kicked damn later gone. They could allegedly it was the end of his term. Um, but why would he not tell me that? Right? Because the first thing I'd be like, Hey man, I'm on my way out. I'm gonna do the best I can for you. Whatever. No, he like called me from Korea visiting the VFWs in Korea. He was on a pa, he was scamming a paid vacation out of'em. Um, why would the head of the VFW go to Korea to see two of the VFWs there when we have Phil, Philly, Phoenix, uh, Tucson, uh, Denver, Nashville, Memphis, like. Those are the places that need your attention. Right. Not Korea. I don't care about the two places there, but you know, maybe he just needed to go on a fact finding trip with his family on a paid vacation all across Asia. But that's what he did. And so ever since then, like I've just been really grateful that my reputation and my friends were able to be there for me in a tough time when, I mean, you have seen people get canceled left and right, like Huda and everything else also, that was completely different scenario. She has an L Love island. Yeah. I don't, we did talk about it last night, but I don't love that. I don't have whatever that station is. So sorry that the app Yeah. That online stuff. Yeah. But like most creators would just like, if, if you got got trouble, they would, they're, they're just like, I'm out. They would fold and your friends stopped talking to you and stuff like that. And my, they don't, yeah. My friends are like, nah, let's go to war. Mm-hmm. Well, even if you're wrong, they're like, let's go to war. That's, that's probably the best part. Yeah. You know, we do that for Brandon, Nick and everything, whatever. We're all protecting each other. The Whitney Levitt of like veteran stuff. I am. Yeah. The girl You said I'm the girl that danced. Yeah. I am not the Whitney Levitt of veterans. You totally are. She just keeps coming back. She gets it and she gets her money. She gets her situation. She figures it out and she's in it. I love that. For you, I feel like comparing me to the woman that danced in the NICU while her child's on a ventilator is pretty rough. Okay. That's not what I'm talking about. That's, that's the thing she's known for. Yeah, that's true. But is it now because she was on Dancing with the Stars? She was on Dancing With the Stars and she was really talented. She was She probably gonna go on Broadway? No, she got kicked out last week because, um, of this Secret Lives situation allegedly. Don't tell me about, don't tell me much. Allegedly. Oh, okay. Too. It's all owned by Disney. It's all owned by Disney. I know, I know. Like it's, yeah, it's, yeah. She knew she was going home. She was like sobbing that whole. They all do. They all know it's very, very scripted. I hate to, it is, I hate to admit that reality's sad about it. She didn't. I wanted, I thought she was really talented and I thought she should have gone further. Yeah. I don't know how they decide who goes further. That is supposedly community votes. Uh, which is why I'm saying like, because it takes this season of Secret Lives came out and she had a poor reputation. She basically, she very was very honest and said, I only came back to film for Secret Lives because I want to do Dancing With the Stars. Yeah, I would too. Yeah. So would every single person ever, and Jen did the same thing. Um, but she was honest about it and people were like, I hate her. She's all mean. She's does this and she only wants to. Which Jen? Jen Affleck. That's so Jen. And yeah, it, I don't know if you actually watch that. Oh, I've watched it, yeah. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like I, no, whenever I love Secret Lives, whenever Christie watches his stuff, like it used to be kind of adverse for it, and I'd be like, but like, I didn't wanna, that's fantastic. I didn't wanna have like weird resentments when it's like her turn to watch a show. So I'd be like, all right, explain to me. All it really does is make me super grateful for her. And like, no, literally she's a normal person. Like other normal people. Yeah. And I'm just like, also, I wouldn't let half this stuff fly like these, these guys are wild. Yep. Yep. That's how Nick felt when we were watching Love Island. Yeah. He's like, what are you watching? And then we'd watch it and then it was almost like a, a couple's therapy. Like why would she act like that? Why would he do that? Like, you know, Calvin loves reality tv. Yeah. But he felt like it was very unproductive, so he's like, we're not gonna watch this anymore. And I said, okay. I watch about myself. Yeah. It, it, it is, but it's like some, some, but it's got nothing to do with the rest of my day. It's pretty easy. Like I can just sit back and be like, no, thinking here. Mm-hmm. Not a. Bit of brain is being used. Yep. It's just like all like medulla, oblong, like it's all just like lizard brain stuff. That's why I read the books that I do, because I'm like, my brain works so hard all the other times of the day. Mm-hmm. I'm like, I just need to read a book that requires no thinking. Um, Elon Musk said that there's a, there's a study I believe is out there about like, the importance of doing something that's good for your brain in particular. Like there's a study link to like playing video games. It's like good, like mental health and like brain health.'cause it's a different level of problem solving as opposed to like day to day stuff. Mm-hmm. So, I don't dunno. I've been looking more into that. I've been trying to read more in general too, but I fall asleep instantly when I start reading. Do you listen to stuff or are you like, I can do that, adhd. I can't listen. No, I can do that really well. Oh. Um, but like, I like to read, but then sometimes my inner monologue goes sideways. Oh. I feel like I don't have an inner monologue when I read. It's opposite when I'm listening. I'll like build the world in my head. Sometimes I'm reading, I'll be like, that's kind of cool. And then I kinda like drift off, but I just found this out. Do you know 50% of people don't have inner monologue? Yes. Isn't that, and people don't see things in their minds. Isn't that wild? What do you, can you explain what you mean? Explain both of it. So when you, an inner monologue is basically like when you have thoughts running at the same time as like a conscious happening. Like you think about things like, I'm gonna open that door. I would think about like all the things about the door. Yeah. Like how I would get there, stuff like that. Yeah. You in the book? No. That's your inner monologue in just life. You're like, Hmm, I'm gonna go walking now. I'm gonna do this. I really need to brush my teeth. Oh man, I gotta wash my hair. I'm gonna wash my hair. Right now you're gym cricket. Like you don't have mine. You just Uhuh. Really? You're just go, Hannah, go. Yeah. That's lucky. I feel like my brain's really tired all the time.'cause I'm always thinking, really? Yeah. Uhuh. That's lucky for you. Anyways, the seeing thing is like if you say I need to, I'm like thinking about an apple. I see the picture of the apple in my mind. Do you see the picture of the apple in your mind? Mm-hmm. Or you just think apple. Do you just like say Apple and there's nothing in there. I can see an apple. I can see me eating an apple. Yeah. Yeah. You make a whole story in there. A whole picture. Yeah. I think that's why I'm so good with faces.'cause I literally like take a picture with my mind and I'm like, now I see you. Do you see apples? Mm-hmm. Do you see the word apple or do you just literally like apple? I just see the word apple. Huh. That's fascinating. But I don't know what this is. Like sometimes I have a hard time listening to a speaker. Mm-hmm. Or like if they have to read around the room. Oh, everyone read a paragraph and I would have to picture them on a podium talking and that's how I lock in. Hmm. That's cool. Actually, I don't know. What is that? I wonder. I don't know. But like if Zach is just reading off a paragraph and I need to focus, I picture him on a podium talking to me. I have a hard time listening to other people read. Yeah. So I have to like. I had to picture them. I see. On a stage. So you picture them as like speaking to you instead of like reading? Yes. I see. That makes sense to me. Yeah, that makes sense. And I would always get annoyed when it was a terrible reader. Oh my gosh. And I'm like, oh, you're the worst speaker ever. Yes, yes. In my, and they're like, you don't have a flow of sentence. You don't like actively punctuate your sentences correctly with your vocalization. No comma and no. Ugh. And I'm just like, oh my God. And then like sometimes we read at school and I wanna like, whoa. The kids, my guys and teachers, a couple of teachers too. I'm like, I gonna work on this Ples. I would got anxiety reading. I would just be like, Ugh, the boy. Yep. See me too. But now that I've been reading so much, like I'm a great reader. I read really fast and I do a great job. I do read fast. I couldn't do it. I had a really adverse, like public speaking. I get stage fright. I, I used to really, it was, it was bad. Mm-hmm. Like, I'm, I'm even getting like, warm thinking about it like I used to. It's so funny'cause it's how everything I do is so outwardly attention seeking. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. But like, deep down, I'm, I'm really just an introvert, uh, pretending to be an extrovert. Mm-hmm. Yeah. You're really good faker. Yeah, you are. Thank you. You do a good job. Thank you. Guys can do it too. Um, that was, I was that funny? That was funny. Funny. That was funny.'cause like, I'll have these moments sometimes, like when I leave here, like I'll get on the plane, I won't talk again until I see my wife. Yeah. And then you're tired and I'm like, oh yeah. I'm not really as extroverted as I think I am. Yep. Um,'cause a lot of it is just a defensive mechanism. Do you feel like social situations are awkward or are you like really excited or are you, do you get nervous about social situations? It de it depends because like, my life is so different now and, and the aspect of like, a lot of what we do is like supporting the businesses or like the, the creation of content and stuff. You have to put yourself out there to market yourself. And Yeah. And nine times out of 10, if I'm with Cody, Brandon and Nick and Eli, everyone's just super pumped to see us. Mm-hmm. So like, you have to meet them there. And I'm super grateful for it. I'll always be grateful for it. These people have changed my life. Um, but like it's, you can't really be a bum when they're like Zach and they're like mm-hmm. They're like, excited to see you. They're supporting you and stuff. Mm-hmm. Or they like, know who you are and stuff. But like, in normal situations, it's a 50 50. Mm-hmm. Because like, the only downfall of having children at the age we did is, um, most of their friends' parents are old, older, like significantly older. Yep. Like ten's the average age mm-hmm. Of how much they're older than us, which isn't crazy, but it's like, you know, now I'm the, the internet guy and they're like accountants. Like they don't, they have no idea. And so like, I, I couldn't have. Of less in common with most of those people, but a few of them, I, I do. And I've, you know, our kids have grown up together through sports and different things like that. Mm-hmm. But it's, I'm, I'm just always like, whatever. And I try to keep like that part of my life very separate. That's good. From the rest of it.'cause I don't, you know, I'm not veteran with a sign or stuff. I'm, you know, you're not war fighter or whatever. No, no, no. I'm, I'm their, I'm their Zachary Bell. Yeah. I'm Zachary Bell. I'm their, I'm their father. I'm, I'm a husband. And like, I don't want, I couldn't, I don't like when I'm with my daughters, they're the main focus. Mm-hmm. And I want them to be, it's about them. It's not about me. Mm-hmm. And so I work, I actually work really hard of like, this is where the line stops. Mm-hmm. Of like internet stuff and things like that. Mm-hmm. Because I don't want them to feel like I'm trying to pull focus off of them or what they're doing. Like, you know,'cause like at first I started doing this and nobody really knew who I was and. Then a few things happened and I've been doing it long enough to, like, now I, you know, I don't know. You get recognized. I, yeah. I don't know when it's gonna happen or if it's gonna happen. And so I'm always trying, like, I'm just here to be their dad, like mm-hmm. You know?'cause like I'll be in Disney and cheering. Somebody will be like, what's up? And I'm just like, how did I get, you know? Right. I'm just like in like a, you know, a Hawaiian shirt, just like walking around with like a backpack doing Disney dad stuff with my family and everything. And you still get recognized. Mm-hmm. And I did. That was, you know,'cause like last year, the VFW stuff happened. I did Jocko and then I did ub. So like, it was just like, go, go, go. And I, I, the, the idea I had is I was gonna try and see like what I could do. And so like, but I couldn't have anticipated like all those things lining up at once. Mm-hmm. So like, it was just like, and so then it like very rapidly changed and, but like, I just, I don't know. I always want to. Be the best dad I can be and like make sure that they know like when I'm around that they're the only thing I really care about. Good for you. I'm trying. Yeah. That was beautiful. Isn't it weird how you have like such a, you either come from a childhood like that you came from mm-hmm. And you either are like, I'm gonna be the best freaking dad I could ever possibly be. Or like you're just another garbage person. Yeah. Another abusive person. Yeah. In a long line of abusive people. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. No broke that generational trauma. Yeah. That was the fire, that was the fire I put out now. You know, see. Yeah. Yeah. That was, um, I just didn't, like when I look at them, I feel like my life has meaning. Mm-hmm. None of the best things I've ever done. And um, like they'll never have any of the concerns that I have. And like, I will go into this earth, like proud of what I've done, especially with my wife, but like, I just wanted their lives to be so much better than mine and it didn't matter what the cost was. Mm-hmm. It's just. Somewhere along the way, I got blessed with this, you know, this job and this profession where I can also have fun. I can also help my community and I can also be in my family's life more than ever. Like, I travel a lot more, but I'm home more than than ever. I'm still working less than I did as when I was working a normal job, if that makes sense. Mm-hmm. Because like, I'm here now, but like, I'll be with them for like three weeks and then like, we're going on family vacations, we're doing things that like mm-hmm. You know, most people dream of and that we're doing it all together and like Yeah. That's the goal. Yeah. It really is. It's, it's fun. Yeah. It's fun. Yeah, I, we don't have what you guys have, but like, now that Calvin works for Nick, like Calvin has like taken the kids to school this year and like picked them up sometimes. Mm-hmm. And previously people were like, oh, we didn't even know you were married. We didn't even know that you like, had a partner. And I was like, yeah. Oh my gosh. Yeah. I am married. They do have a dad. Like, well, and the ring, I was like, we don't wear rings. So like, they would never know just by little bit. Well, no, I know. I took Audrey to middle school every day. Yeah. Every day. Picked her up. Mm-hmm. Not gonna lie, I hated being in the car rider line because we had to get there like an hour early. Yeah. And I'd always be like, what do, what do other people do? Not everyone's making content online. Mm-hmm. Like, how are y'all, how are you beating me here? Mm-hmm. Um, but I was, I talked to her every morning, every, every afternoon. But you know. Christy took, um, Alyssa to school. And so like, that was what we did, and I was just like, Hey, let's hang out. And I remember she would like even hold my hand in the morning sometimes, and I was like, this is the best feeling of all time. Yeah. I love this so much. I love her so much. I'll give her whatever she wants. Yep. You know, like they're, they're the best. Mm-hmm. Like, uh, I'm excited to go home now. Yeah. Mm-hmm. We're my boys the best. Literally, I am going to go pick one of them up. Yes. So right now Yeah. 10 30. Yep. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I'm one of those moms that's in line. I know. Yeah. And I probably should check on Nicholas. I've tried texting him like, are you up? Are you up? He's probably still sleeping. He probably is. So yeah. Before we've got, are you all going together? Go with the boys? We can. We can A party. Mm-hmm. I'm sleeping in my mind. He does it. He's actually, yeah, you come with me and then you, me. Oh, okay. I text the teacher. Okay. But everyone, thank you so much for listen, this is awesome to this episode. Awesome. Yes. Thank y'all for having me. I hope I did okay. I know. Oh, you did great. I ran wonderful. It was nice to see. It was great, huh? In a different, put your social anxiety away. It was great. No, I hate it. What you don't know is I'll listen to this like in an airport whenever it comes out. Be like, I hate you. Oh gosh. No. But thank you for coming on today. Yeah. We appreciate you. Thank you for being so open and being so kind and very good host. I appreciate it. Told you I'm the nicest person ever anyway. Mm-hmm. This has been Hannah. Oh, and Sarah. And Zach Rebell. Zach Rebel. Zach Rebell. Yeah. Bye bye. Bye.