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Coco Off the Grid
Let's go off the grid and get silly with today's headlines, work dramas and the unexplainable actions of others.
Close your blinds, shut off your lights and put your phones on airplane mode because it's time to join me for another episode of "Coco Off the Grid."
Coco Off the Grid
A Hot 2025
This episode reflects on the transition into the New Year, weaving in humorous and relatable stories about unexpected household troubles, family dynamics, and the quest for comfort through video games. The discussion highlights personal growth and the importance of embracing all of life's quirks while looking ahead with optimism.
• Embracing the New Year with reflections and aspirations
• Confronting life’s metaphorical pests and personal growth
• Humor in navigating maintenance encounters
• Multilingual family dinners and communication barriers
• Misadventures in finding the perfect holiday restaurant
• The escapism of video games and their deeper themes
• A hopeful outlook for the upcoming year with plans for personal growth
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So what's happening? My people? Happy New Year. We are starting off just right. Do you know why? Because when I got on the scale yesterday, I was down two pounds from my original weight the day before. So that's hilarious. So December 31st I weighed two pounds more. January 1st, two pounds less. Let's go, anyway. So I'm hoping everybody had a fantastic new year To start it off.
Speaker 1:I'm going to complain about some shit that happened last year. So last week well, earlier this week, I should say I had maintenance come, because there is an issue with some drain bugs hanging out in my bathtub. I don't fucking like that. With some drain bugs hanging out in my bathtub, I don't fucking like that. To me, bugs is an indicator that the house is dirty, which is not always the case. I'm just a crazy person and I grew up in Manhattan where everything was dirty. Well, let's just say, it might be cleaned up now. It's just everything that I've seen from living there when I was younger indicates that there's a lot of shit everywhere all the time.
Speaker 1:We had a mouse one time. It was crazy. I'm going to tell you this story. We lived in a small one bedroom apartment. It was me, my mother and then two little babies. So there was four of us living in a one bedroom. It was crazy. They had the crib, she had the crib in the bedroom with her, just no room for anything. Okay, that's how people in Manhattan live because you can't, it's too expensive, it's too fucking expensive, so you can't do anything.
Speaker 1:So this story has to do with a little mouse in the house, and I'm going to start this off by saying I woke up feeling good, I don't even know how the motherfucker got in the place, but the bathroom is nowhere near the front door. You walk in, to the right is a little dining room area. The kitchen is to the immediate right. So, like when you first walk in and you're facing forward, there's the whole living room, there's a small dining area, kitchen is to the right, offshoot from the dining room, obviously, and the front door, and then there's a excuse me a bedroom, bathroom, and there was, like I think there was, a closet for towels, or I'm lying to myself, in any case. Um, in any case it was. It was a mess, it was tiny, it was tight, we had too much shit, there wasn't enough room to do anything. But anyway, that's how people live in Manhattan, especially in the other areas. Cool, my shipped delivery is on its way. So I went to use the restroom after I woke up, like people do when they have to pee first thing in the morning.
Speaker 1:And I'm sitting there and I hear a whole bunch of like scratching in the bathtub and I'm like I wonder what that sound is. And I'm really young, so I've you know I don't see rodents. The only rodent I'd seen at that point was like Jerry from Tom and Jerry, little brown mouse that was fucking with Tom all the time. And I can understand and relate to Tom now. And that's so funny that when you're a kid you relate to Jerry, but when you're older you relate to Tom, who's like please stop fucking with me and leave me alone. That's what that cat is doing the whole time. He's like why are you like this?
Speaker 1:So anyway, I'm sitting there hearing the scratching and then all of a sudden I'm like what does that sound? I don't know anything about that sound. So I go and I look and as soon as I pull the sheet back, like the shower curtain and the liner, the fucking thing jumps out of the bathtub and just scurries away and we have no idea where it went. So here we are just living with this fucking mouse until we moved out. But just so disgusting. I'm like like there was even like. So my grandfather came over, he put down mousetraps and there was one by the fucking by my feet. Like the mousetrap was by my foot, under the desk where my computer was, where I like to play games, because that's an area that you don't see. You don't see, and then it's kind of just like oh, whatever. So that's my mouse story is very quick, painless, stupid. So I don't know where I was going with this story, but anyway, it doesn't matter. It does not matter, yeah.
Speaker 1:So I called maintenance, that's what it was pests. So I called maintenance. The guy came to like I told him I was like look, I'm having a drain problem. It's very, it's probably clogged, whatever, because it's drains really slow and it shouldn't. It's been draining slow since we moved in, but it's gotten worse lately.
Speaker 1:So, knowing me, I pour bleach down the drain to like kill whatever's in there. And then you know, I get like not pesticides, but like it's called the green gobbler. I put a stick down there. It's like a citrus stick. It's supposed to keep them away, and then, of course, that worked for like five days and then New Year's Eve I see, well, two like one at a time, though never at the same time. So I don't know if they're like hatching or whatever or whatever the case may be, but whatever. So of course I put the. I finally got the gel and that's what I've been.
Speaker 1:Googling is like you know what's the best way to kill any bugs in your drain or any eggs, whatever the case may be, that are in your drain, that you don't know about whatever? So I Googled it and they said that the drain gel is the best way to do it, because not only does it kill on contact, it kind of stays in the plumbing for a little bit to deter more. So I did that last night. I took the bath mat out, like the shower mat, you know, so you don't slip and break your shit Took that out. Haven't seen one since. So we'll see how that goes. I'm going to do a cup a day for a week and then I'll do once a week. If I start seeing them, I'm probably going to do it more because I'm crazy.
Speaker 1:I don't like bugs. Bugs in my house means there is something wrong, something dirty, and honestly I think there's something wrong with the plumbing. Because when maintenance came he was like no, there's nothing, there's nothing there. He's like. He even came with the thing to like try and unclog the drain and he was like your drain is pretty clean, like there's nothing. So I'm like, so it must be the fucking bugs doing it. So that's my thing there. But what's funnier is thing there. But what's funnier is perfect, hold on a second.
Speaker 1:So the thing with that is is that the maintenance dude looks like Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs. So every time I'm like alone with him, I like text my mom, like hey, bro, if I die it's because this maintenance man came and I know what his name is, but I'm not going to dock something like that. But he's a little strange. He likes to talk about himself a lot, which I wouldn't mind if I didn't have shit to do. Like bro, I'm kind of like balancing work and life at the same time and I really just need you to figure out if my drain needs to be unclogged or whatever. And that sounds like a porno. But I have no interest in that guy because he looks like a serial killer. So that's life.
Speaker 1:And then I got to talking with Dan about this, about like life alert, and they have to have something that lets people know if there's something wrong with your pulse, to have them call 911. And it's a life alert thing, but that's like when I've fallen and I can't get up, like that's what it is for that, but I just don't. I think they need something more complex than that. But I had my uncle visit last, uh, last week, the day after wait, yes, the 26th, right? Hmm, yes, the day after Christmas, because the day after Christmas was a Thursday and he was in town. He had his sister visiting from Puerto Rico. She brought her child it looks like they went to Disney, obviously, because she's really young, and what's funny is that I love my uncle to death.
Speaker 1:But I this I didn't understand like we all went out to eat Him, my aunt beth, me, his sister, his other niece okay, so we go out to eat. I don't speak a lick of spanish, okay, I speak no words of spanish. I understand it, I know what they're saying to each other, but it's like Very awkward because it's my aunt and me, my aunt, aunt Beth and me on one side, and then it's him, his sister and his other niece on the other side. So obviously it's like, hey, english speakers on one side, spanish speakers on the other. So it was really funny and I'm just like you know you want me to like I don't know what the intention was for the dinner. Did you want me to like be friends with her? Like how am I going to be friends with her if she doesn't understand what I'm saying? Because she's just like really fluent in Spanish. I don't think she speaks any words of English, or else I didn't hear it or I'm not paying attention to what's happening on that side of the table because I can't get into the conversation anyway. So it's like who really even cares? Like there's no way for me to be involved with this conversation he's having with her. So that's basically.
Speaker 1:It was the funniest dinner. We went to the craziest place. It was called the Palm Tree Club in Point Orlando. I fucking drive over there in record time because I wanted to go to the bank to deposit some cash that I got for Christmas and I was like traffic's going to be stupid. It's I-4. And then I forget like it's a holiday, so people might be staying in for the whole week to avoid all that shit. I get there in record time. Uh, and of course I'm still thinking Point Orlando and Icon Park are next to each other. So I'm like, okay, if I park, and I think that I'm thinking that it's all together and I just have to like, park my car and take a walk to the place. Can I tell you that I felt so stupid that I parked at Icon Park I had paid for it already and then had to walk a mile and a half to the Palm Tree Club and then I couldn't even fucking find it. And then I saw one of the restaurants they were talking about, which was the Hampton Social or whatever. Then I was like, oh, now I see it.
Speaker 1:I wound up after I walked a mile and a half. I ended up trying to walk up some stairs, then down some stairs. Let me tell you, my feet hurt and I told my uncle what happened and he's like oh, you're not walking again that late. He was like you're not, you're not walking again that late. To uh, to the car, because we're gonna be done late and you're not walking a mile and a half by yourself to the parking lot. So I said, all right, cool, um. So we did that and of course, the uh, we ate. The place was weird. Um, I've never eaten there before.
Speaker 1:I think my aunt and uncle I don't know if it was their first time too, but of course I get there and they're like, hey, do you want some water? Or like, what do you want to drink? And I'm like, well, I'm certainly not drinking alcohol right now because I need water or I'm going to melt like the Wicked Witch of the West. So I got some water. And then, of course, you know, because they like to party way too hard for my liver, so of course she had already been drinking, like they were already at the bar when I found them. They were already at the bar when I found them and I was like, okay, cool.
Speaker 1:And then my uncle doesn't know how to drop a pin. So he's trying to figure out how to tell his sister how to get there. And I'm like, bro, just drop a pin. And he's like, what does that even mean? And I'm like, okay, give me your phone. So I took his phone and I showed him how to do it. Then my aunt goes wait, I was like, if you don't see it automatically, cause my phone does it. When I go, I'm at it, it pops up share location. So I was trying to share my location with my uncle so he could figure out where I am, so he could tell me how to get to the restaurant, and now he's trying to do the same thing for his sister. So I'm like that's hilarious. So then, of course, um, he, we eat.
Speaker 1:It was weird food. I some sushi, I had some meatballs, I had some pasta. It was like the weirdest combination of shit you could ever think to eat. Uh, it was good though, but it was it was. I was very full by the end of it, like I was like this is way too much. And then, of course, I get back to the apartment and just want to go to sleep, which is basically what I did. I showered and went to bed uh, no bugs.
Speaker 1:That night, because it was the first night that I'd, you know, put the what you call it, I did the vinegar, baking soda and salt down the drain and that poof kind of like cleared everything out, and then the shower started to drain better, and then I put one of those little citrusy sticks down there so that they could chill the fuck out and leave me alone. So that's what I did that night. I went out to eat. Let me tell you I was so excited Friday to not have to go anywhere. I was like thank God I could just get to sit around and then check this out. So the weekend the plan was so Monday of last week All right, it's Christmas Eve, eve the 23rd, the boyfriend goes to fucking Pep Boys for me to get my tires balanced and rotate it.
Speaker 1:Okay, we have the wheel lock key. Okay, we he. It was given to them to take the tires off the car because we didn't have the right one when he went to go do my oil change. All right, so we're all thinking. We're thinking everything is fine and cool. Whatever, the car seems fine.
Speaker 1:The plan was I was supposed to go get my breaks done on Sunday, which was the 29th. So the 29th the boyfriend made an appointment with his mechanic friend, paid him already, like paid in advance, said she's going to come by. Either he or I was going to come by. He had to work Sunday unfortunately. So I got my ass up at 7 am on a Sunday to go do chores.
Speaker 1:So I fucking go on Sunday and I'm sitting there and he goes hey, where's the wheel lock key? So I said I think it's in the trunk, because that's where I sell the package last. So of course he goes and he grabs it and he says to me this isn't the right one. And I was like, what do you mean? And he said this wheel lock here. There's no way I can't take the tires off with this because this is not the right one. And I was like, oh my God. So my first thought is obviously pet boys, because I'm like they must fucking cap my shit. So of course I call and leave a message because it's Sunday and they're not open. And then I call again Monday. So this is Monday of this week. So what day was that? The 30th? So now I call in, I go hey.
Speaker 1:So I came in last Monday 2018 Kia Optima. My boyfriend actually came in and, um, I think you guys might have my wheel lock key because I tried to go get my brakes done and they are not able to take my tires off because they my boyfriend actually came in and, um, I think you guys might have my wheel lock key because I tried to go get my brakes done and they are not able to take my tires off because they don't have it, like it's the wrong key. That's in my car, so maybe I have yours and you have mine. Whatever he said, um, I think the conversation got confused because he was like, was it in a package with like four lug nuts? And I was like, yeah, and he goes, I have it in hand. So of course I go cool, what time do you close today? He goes, we close at um. He goes, we close at any time at um, you can come get it anytime between now and seven. So I'm like, all right, cool.
Speaker 1:So the boyfriend goes and does it for me. He goes back to pet boys to pick up the fucking wheel lock key that supposedly they have and they say that they can't find it because the one that he had in his hand they tried to send my boyfriend off with the incorrect one again. So they don't have it or they can't find it. So we don't even know if they actually did the tire rotation and the balance of the tires. So we don't even know what they did. How did you get my tires off If you don't know where the part is or you don't even know what they did? How did you get my tires off If you don't know where the part is or you don't even have it. Did you send it off with someone else? So, in any case, um, we, we fucking, he fucking left.
Speaker 1:He comes home. Uh, he told me that they're going to order the part. So I'm like, all right, fine, they call me Tuesday and they're like hey, the part came in last night. When did it come in, bro? Did it come in last night after my boyfriend left? When did it come in? Because you guys closed at 7. My boyfriend was there at 5.30. When did it come? When did it come? And so of course, I'm pissed off and he goes again. The boyfriend goes again, bless him. He goes and he says, uh, he goes. They ordered the wrong part, so they ordered the wrong wheel lock key. So twice in a row, I still don't have what I need to get my breaks done. So I'm like, fuck it. I've had a day. It's fucking. I got some news from the doctor I didn't want to hear. Now I'm dealing with this shit. It's fucking. I got some news from the doctor I didn't want to hear. Now I'm dealing with this shit.
Speaker 1:It was just a stressful New Year's Eve and then I have to cook a whole fucking ham and all this other shit and it's just too much. It was too much on New Year's Eve. I could not take it. I was pissed at everything. If the wind blew my hair the wrong way, I was getting angrier, so I was just like you know what. I'm going to go work out real quick because you know I'm going to start dinner and then I'm going to work out, try and calm down and then we'll see what happens. Dinner was bomb, always because I'm the shit every time I cook something, and that was it. That was the day I had on New Year's Eve Also. Fuck Pep Boys and Castleberry, fuck you guys. Okay, because you took something of mine and you lost it. And not only did you try and order another piece, but you got the wrong one. So who the fuck is running that place? Like I'm going to have. Like I hope that there's a Yelp review somewhere soon that says that talks about the incompetence of these motherfuckers in that place.
Speaker 1:I don't think I've ever been more mad at a situation that's just gone stupidly downhill so quickly. Like. So now what you're telling me is the $83 that were spent to do. What did you do with? What did you do? What did you do? Because somehow you took my tires off supposedly, or you didn't. So what is it? What? What happened? What is Megan saying? Make sure to send Robert, debbie and Jenny. Okay, jenny is the main payroll admin. Okay, I don't give a fuck. Sorry, this works stuff. So yeah, so that was the stupidest New Year's Eve I've ever had. I've never been more annoyed with people than in that situation and I'm trying to let it go. But like stuff like that, my car is very fucking important. Okay, I only have one car. So like, if that craps out, who the fuck am I blaming besides the Lord for giving me such shitty luck so far? Who the fuck am I blaming besides the Lord for giving me such shitty luck so far? In any case, let's calm down.
Speaker 1:So the past two weeks I've been working from home and it's been a very productive like break from the office. I'm just going to say, gotten a lot of stuff done around the apartment, beaten a lot of video games. I haven't done that in a very long time. Like, playing video games is my shit, but I get so ADD about it that I switch between so many games. Is this guy, did this guy deliver my shits? Who is this? No, that's the neighbor that moved, sorry, checking my blink camera because I want my groceries and I want to make sure that they're put at my door camera because I want my groceries and I want to make sure that they're put at my door. So a lot of video games played. I've beaten three games so far in like the span of three days. Well, it was a lot of work to get through Outer Worlds because I'd never played it before, but I played it consistently all last week and then I think Saturday, friday or Saturday was the day that I beat that game. Then I went on to killer frequency, which was really cool, because you become a.
Speaker 1:You go from being a DJ, a radio DJ, to a 911 operator because there's a serial killer on the loose and the person who's the 911 person has to help the sheriff or whoever. The sheriff, I think, gets killed, one of the deputies gets injured. So the 911 operator says hi, we need you to help us with the civilians of this, you know, with the residents of this city, to make sure that nobody else gets killed or whatever, because there's a serial killer in town and it's called the Whistling man and it was cool. It's a cool concept. A lot of it is common sense stuff. A lot of it is you have to find materials around the radio station and use them as tools to help you, uh, use them as tools to help you get the people, uh, safe, like you have to make sure they can. You get them to an area like you're pretty much walking them through how to survive. Like there's a group of teenagers you got to pick from the list of a friendship quiz you find at reception. Who would be best at what situation or what scenario. Who's going to be the runner? Who's going to be the person to distract? Who's going to be the person who lock, picks the gate so they can get through? Like it was a whole bunch of shit. It was crazy. It was a good game, though. The twist at the end is really good and I'm not going to give it away, but it's a good playthrough. I don't know if it's on the computer, but I know it's on the PS5 and that's what I played it on and, yes, I did play it. It's not an invisible game. It was a lot of fun. It was free on the PlayStation store and I like free games, so it was Outer Worlds, spacer Choice Edition, Spacer's Choice and that one has two DLCs and the base game. So that's a lot of man hours to be doing that game.
Speaker 1:The reason why I bring this up is because the microphone quality in those games is very different. Also, I beat Alone in the Dark yesterday. I started it, what the fuck? No, I beat that game Tuesday. Yesterday I was playing Ghost of Tsushima. So Monday I started Alone in the Dark, was scared to death, but I played it all day long, which was like 12 hours. And then, of course, what else did I play Then? That's when I started Ghost of Tsushima. I saw one of my friends playing it on stream and I was like, all right, it might be a good time waster. So I found my next game and it was fun. It's fun so far.
Speaker 1:Like I said, I'm not playing games on standard anymore because I think that's bullshit. So I'm back to easy because I don't have patience. I've run out of so much patience at 35 trying to play games on standard because the difficulty for standard has definitely changed. It's nowhere near the same as it used to be, so I'm just not doing it. So Alone in the Dark has so much of a difference in microphone quality. Like the voice actors. I don't know where they were doing these things, but you can actually hear the saliva in people's mouths in that game. Like when you hear the voice actors, you can hear everything going on in their mouth and I'm like ugh, because I was playing Outer Worlds and it sounded crispy clean. And the same thing goes for Killer Frequency Crispy clean, okay. And then you play Alone in the Dark and you hear all in their mouth and I'm like bro, what am I playing? It was just awful. I was like what quality this game was. The quality of this game is so good. And then, of course, they do stupid shit like that and I'm like what the fuck is this nonsense?
Speaker 1:I think I'm going to try Black Myth Wukong only because the boyfriend thinks I'd be interested in it, cause right now I'm in the mood for story rich games, like. I know I have Path of Exile 2 to play, but I'm like, all right, that's more of like a grindy, hustly game and I honestly just want to enjoy a story. For me there might be a main campaign in Path of Exile, but it's not holding me, like if it's, if it's one of those games where I'm like, ooh, I got to beat this Cause I need to know what happens If I'm not doing that. That who the fuck? Who the fuck? Why am I playing it Like it just for me? I need, I need a story, I need content, I need fucking strength to keep me.
Speaker 1:Playing a game Like RDR2 is probably going to be my next one. Actually, I want to play RDR 1. I didn't even finish that one, so I'm trying to get better at things like that. I think I ended 2024 on a good note by beating some games, really just trying to get back into the swing of things, creative wise. I think it will be really good for my brain, my mental health and all that.
Speaker 1:I just also like chilling with you guys talking and shit. I started playing Bioshock 2 as a big daddy big daddy sorry I can't speak and it's been a lot of fun. I have a lot of fun connecting with my people on Twitch, a lot of whom, some of whom listen to this podcast, some of whom don't, but some of whom hang out in discord, so we talk anyway, don't, but some of whom hang out in discord, so we talk anyway. So it's not necessary to be everywhere with me, but I have a lot of fun and I do include my names and shit in the bios of these episodes, so if anyone's ever interested in linking up, it's there. Um, it's there. Uh, tiktok seems to be what. Going out of business soon we have 17, 17 days left supposedly. Business soon we have 17 days left, supposedly. But we'll see, let's see.
Speaker 1:But Alone in the Dark was really good. Like I played it and finished it Tuesday and I was like now what? And like I would play the Last of Us 2, but I already know what's coming in that game and I really don't want to be upset again Like I'll fucking leave the room when that one scene happens, it happens, I'll fucking leave. Because that game came out on my birthday and when I saw that shit upsettingly I was crying with the controller in my hand and I'm not really interested in having that kind of feeling. You know what I mean Like I'm trying to have a good time and I know a lot of these games are meant for a good time, but I'm not interested in crying through the part that I would cry through, which I already know what it is, and I don't want it. I want there to be a moment where I can skip shit like that, because sadness is in reality. I don't need that. That's where I come to video games to not be sad.
Speaker 1:Excuse me, I needed a sip of something. Excuse me, I needed a sip of something. What that's so hilarious? Sorry, I just read something, so this might be a short episode. I don't have much because, uh, it's a new year and I don't have anything yet to complain about. Um, I did color my hair yesterday.
Speaker 1:I am getting back into the swing of working out again. It was kind of iffy for the week of Christmas, because Monday, tuesday, monday I worked out. Tuesday I didn't because I had some last minute errands to run. Wednesday obviously didn't because it was Christmas, but we drove to my mother's. That's when we found out my car was having some issues. Thursday I didn't work out because I was just lazy. Friday I did a little bit of something like when you don't see, here's the thing that bothers me is that you know, I love being consistent with working out, but I don't like the fact that I don't see anything happening when I'm consistent with it. And I know it's not really about how, how much weight you lose, it's more about, like, how you feel I'm trying to be more disciplined. So I'm including more yoga and Pilates into my practice, because the shit that I was doing before was not working. So in incorporating yoga and Pilates, I've seen a difference. I feel a difference. I feel a little bit stronger, feel a little bit more sturdy, like my posture is improving.
Speaker 1:Um, I think I did tweak my shoulder, though yesterday, so I'm not sure if I'm going to do something today, but it really fucking hurts. So I might either give it a break or see what I could do to like, maybe you know, unstrain it, cause, like, while I'm rolling my shoulder right now, I hear a lot of clicking and popping, which is not great, but I think I'll be okay. It was a lot of like planking on, planking on forearms, and I'm like, oh God. So I think I'm going to. I'm going to have this be a short one because I don't have much to talk about. I didn't take a lot of notes on anything. Oh yeah, so check this out.
Speaker 1:I have a thing from Christmas. So I go over to my mother's. I got everybody gift cards, um, cause it's just easier. Uh, my stepdad was like don't go crazy for Christmas, give us gift cards, it's fine. Um, we know you guys are planning for other things and we don't want you to spend your money crazy like that. So we're like, okay, cool. So on Christmas we go to my mother's, I give the cards out. Um, they love them. Everything had a personalized message in it. Uh, the boyfriend signed them too, and then that was it.
Speaker 1:We kind of like ate dinner. Of course. We get there and she goes we've been waiting for you to eat and I'm like you guys could eat without us. Like it's not really that big a deal, like who? Who's crying about you guys eating when we're not there? Not us, cause we're not there. So we ate. It was like two 30.
Speaker 1:Then we sat down and we watched movies for the rest of the day. We watched violent night and then we watched the movie Nobody. Then we watched the movie Nobody both really good action movies. If you haven't seen them yet, please see them. Nobody has the guy from Better Call Saul in it, which I think is fantastic. And then, of course, violent Night has David Harbour as Santa kicking ass like he should. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:My watch is telling me that I'm being lazy because I haven't moved a lot. Oh well, so what? And then I saw a commercial for the Apple Watch Series 10, talking about motivation on your wrist, I'm like, yeah, well, it motivates me to be lazy when it acts like my mother and tells me I need to get up and do something. So that's it for that. Um, so, to round it out, that's what we did.
Speaker 1:And then we left at six o'clock because it's a two hour drive for us from Castleberry to Riverview, which is where my parents are, and I'm just like I'm so over driving over there for holidays. I really am, and you know, I'm not even like I don't get upset over shit like that anymore, it's just I'm tired. So like the next time I see them might be who knows when, because I'm legitimately just overdoing that two hour drive. I see them might be who knows when, because I'm legitimately just overdoing that two-hour drive. It's wear and tear on my car. I love them, but I'm not going over there for Easter.
Speaker 1:I don't know about Mother's Day either, because it's a Sunday, so I'm not really trying to do that either. I'll send her a present or something if I have to. I mean, last time, for Mother's Day was basically around the time my sisters graduated from high school, so I kind of gave her her gift in front of her, like I was already at the house. So I was like hey look, same day shipping bling and send it. Sent it right to the house and she got them like while I was still there, and then, of course, what a two hour drive home. So I got home at like midnight and I was still in the old apartment so was tired. It makes me curious, though, with the bug problems I have had in that place, were there bugs in my apartment already and I just was like too stupid to notice, like were they already doing their sex orgy thing and I just never noticed.
Speaker 1:But anyway, so ship shoppers uh, considering I have a delivery, a delivery coming, I always think it's funny because that's cool. Let me see Delivery shipped, delivery in 13 minutes. That's cool, okay, cool. I never actually clicked on that link before to see how that tracking works. So, anyway, there are certain ones that I like and there's certain ones that I don't like. Those that communicate really well get saved to my shopper list. So I don't know how I get people that I don't like delivering my stuff. And I placed an $80 order today and it's from Target, and let me tell you, those people do God's work, because my favorite one came New Year's Eve and delivered all the shit I need, needed excuse me, or was it Walmart, I don't remember, I think it was Walmart, but I order groceries a lot.
Speaker 1:I just I don't want to be. For me, a sign of having wealth is having food in your fridge Not really like to me, like, yeah, dollars and cents, whatever, but like gas in my car, food in my fridge. My rent is paid, my bills are paid, like my electricity and all that, and I'm good. I don't really think I need anything outside of that and that's like a really grown up thing for me to say so. It's a proud moment for me, but I really just don't. There's nothing else I really need.
Speaker 1:Like when I was younger, you know, I lived at home and I was like, yeah, I don't really want to be home. So maybe that was like the reason why I would go out so much is because I lived at home and it was tight and it was just just, you know, hanging out the fam or going out and hanging out with friends and just getting to be outside for a little bit. But like now, I couldn't hate outside more. Do you see all the violence going on right now, being outside, being inside seems good to me, being inside seems like a win for me, but I think that's fab. So anyway, the ship shopper I have, I think, is very. He doesn't communicate well, so I was surprised. Maybe he got some feedback on it, but I was surprised that he let me know that there wasn't any of the toilet paper that I wanted and that there was a substitute similar to that. So maybe he changed a little bit, or maybe his New Year's resolution is to be less of a dick, you know, like, maybe he's just being more chill. I hope he doesn't hear that while he's walking up to my door, but I'll be able to hear that anyway.
Speaker 1:So I have a couple things from Facebook. Hold on, because you know I like to read these. So this was stupid, this was the dumbest thing ever and I have to say it was kind of funny that I got to this, but it was also really stupid. So it says your lady ever squirt in an ice tray, put little sticks in it and leave it in the freezer before she goes on a trip. So when you miss her, you can have little squirtsicles. That's my love language Squirtsicles.
Speaker 1:The internet's not for everyone. The internet's not for everyone, and that's a good indicator of why. It's a good indication For sure. Let's see. I think I sent something interesting to a friend of mine. Hold up, what did I send him? Oh right, so I posted something to my story on Instagram.
Speaker 1:That's what happened. I posted something to my story on Instagram. I thought it was funny. It says mayor de lulu, come true, lulu, thank you, lord hallelujah. So I was like you know what? I'm posting that because that's funny as fuck, damn, I got so many views on this shit. So, in any case, I posted that, posted that, and my friend Rel goes like he puts the vomit face. I'm like, look, we need them bitches, we need the Lulus, because I need entertainment. I need something to entertain me this year. Oh God, oh God, nope. See, I found another one. That's a big no. So this is. It says it's from a group that I'm in and Facebook is so stupid. What made you orgasm like never before. And then there's two regular comments that are like minimized. And then there's this one pumpkin fucking. When I was a teenager, I got so horny I drew boobs on a pumpkin, then put a condom on it and fucked it All the little. I can't, bro, that's fucking. Ew, bro, pumpkin fucking, jesus Christ. Let's see. Let me see this. I think that's pretty much it, but that's so fucking silly. Let me see this. I think that's pretty much it, but that's so fucking silly. Let's see.
Speaker 1:Free speech only exists until you scare the rich Social media users. Expressing views other than condemnation for UnitedHealthcare's CEO's murder may be flagged as extremist. An NYPD report says who the fuck cares? Let's see. I will not apologize for being white. I will not apologize for defending my homeland against invaders.
Speaker 1:Someone tell this guy to get back to moderating discourse. Oh my God, the picture of him, though. The picture of him, though that forehead is so square, that's so hilarious. What the hell? How can I prevent abortion? Nope, skipping that one. Can I prevent abortion? Nope, skipping that one. Let's see.
Speaker 1:Oh no, if Mario Kart was about pure driving, I would win every race, but unfortunately, my competitors insist on engaging in a great deal of unsportsmanlike behavior. What the fuck? I'm tired of seeing fucking. I'm tired of seeing fucking. I'm tired of seeing this Sandy Cheeks fucking, like this Sandy shit from, oh God, sandy from SpongeBob SquarePants. Okay, if I see one more post about this thing. Jesus Christ, it came. It finally came. Now I can clap Sandy's cheeks like I've always dreamed of, but I'm willing to sell for the right price. They're not easy to come by and it's only been used once. Gently, I take good care of things.
Speaker 1:I was also surprised to see it feels just like a real squirrel too. There's so many things wrong with this post. There's so many things wrong with this post Like, sir, what are you talking about? What are you talking about? You fucked a real squirrel. You fucked a real squirrel squirrel. Do you know how tiny a squirrel is? How would the mechanics work for that? I have questions.
Speaker 1:Someone said their comment goes as I'm sitting here watching sponge spongebob. Then someone said does she need to look dead? And this is yes. That's the only way this fetish works. She looks like she's an ecstasy to me. You know from the chi clapping. Someone said that's nuts. How does he know what real squirrel skibusi feels like, bro skibusi? Oh my god. I considered the question then realized I do not want to know because he probably does. Oh my god, skibusi dude, I miss who I was before seeing this. Right, right. What's wrong with people? Oh my God, jesus Christ, I'm sorry, I'm just scrolling through and just congrats, it's aborted.
Speaker 1:Someone is eating a baby into a fucking basketball hoop. Okay, you know, if we're doing cakes for that, that's cool. So this one's funny too. I saw this the other day. It says baby girl spoilers. Mufasa was blasting in the theater across from me, so I had to hear CGI lions sing their little hearts out while Nicole Kidman silently got fingered, just as the director intended.
Speaker 1:First of all, I do want to see Baby Girl, but secondly, I think it's going to be a little bit awkward, only because Nicole Kidman's an older woman and this younger executive, I believe, works with her and, I guess, decides to dominate her ass because her life is boring and she wants some excitement, but then doesn't realize that this shit probably becomes an obsession and he starts to like, invade her life, whatever, and potentially get her husband involved. I don't know the full story, but I'm assuming that that's what happens, because why the fuck else would be called baby girl? And he calls her that in the fucking movie. So apparently, if he calls her that, that's the trigger word for hey, I'm going to fuck you. However, I want to, which you know, whatever, if that's what you're into.
Speaker 1:I've also realized, rewatching certain shows, there's certain things I don't like about characters. So I'm watching the Office again, I'm flying through it, flying through it like I always have, because they're like 25 minute episodes and it's been good so far, except for the fact that I realized, you know, a lot of the things that happen in that office is kind of just like. I've never worked with people like that. I think it would be interesting to do so, but I'd probably be the Jim in this situation. Just like looking at the camera breaking the fourth wall, talking about is this person serious? Like the last episode always gets me because it is really cool how they give you.
Speaker 1:They thank the people who recorded the documentary, saying thank you for giving me all this perspective about my life over the past nine years. Like Jim says at the end that you know, how did you, how did you show, how did you do this? Like, how did you make this thing, this silly little paper company, look like such a beautiful part of my life? And it's interesting because it was. He got to do a lot of things with his life in that show and if you had the opportunity to have that happen for nine years, would you want to take that opportunity to see what your life was and see what it would become in nine or 10 years. I think it would be interesting. I think I would be in a lot of trouble, but I think it would be interesting because the trouble is what you want in your life.
Speaker 1:I think every decision you've ever made to get you to the point that you're at now is never something you should ever regret. Like when I was younger, I could say, yeah, I regret dating that person whatever. And like now I'm like, no, you know, if I hadn't dated who I dated before I left New York, I wouldn't be where I am now. If I hadn't moved out of my family's house and closer to Orlando, I wouldn't have met my boyfriend. There's a lot of things that I would never take back in my life, you know, not even maybe starting a family or anything, because you don't want that to happen with the wrong person, because then you're not really stuck. But you also have to deal with them for the rest of their life, like up until the child's 18. And then they make the choice to do whatever they want after that. But it's like I wouldn't regret anything that I've done so far and it's.
Speaker 1:There's a lot of mistakes that I've definitely made. There's a lot of wrong people I've dated. There's a lot of wrong avenues I've taken, but, with everything that I've learned and all the scars I've had to bear, I would not be who I am today and I would not be speaking to you guys today about this If I didn't feel that it sends a message to whoever is like struggling with any of their feelings, struggling with any self doubts, body image issues, anything like that. There are people that are there for you. I'm there for you if you want it. Like I said, I share my social medias. If you ever want to talk about anything, I'm here for that. Like I said, I share my social medias. If you ever want to talk about anything, I'm here for that. I'm always. I'm always.
Speaker 1:I'm a very good listener and I'll do my best to give you advice on things. Definitely not old enough to give advice, but you know I can give you. My experiences is all I can give you, and I think a lot of everything that I've ever talked about in either podcast I still have to see about uploading the other one, anything that I've put creatively out. There is nothing I'd ever take back Everything that I've written down in a journal. I don't care who reads it anymore. I cared back then because I think it was a breach of trust because I didn't leave those journals out there to be read. He kind of just went through my shit, so that's that's kind of what the breach of trust is for me, and then tried to use it against me as part of my personality of saying that you're not this person.
Speaker 1:Why, why are you writing these things down? Is this actually how you feel? Why do I have to listen to your podcast to learn about you? You don't. You didn't have to. But if you want to know things about me, just ask me. You don't have to like play the victim. In saying that I'm playing a victim, releasing my real feelings, because if I can't talk about what I want to talk about on here, then I'm doing myself an injustice and I'm not doing a service as a creator, a content creator, to get the word out about life Okay, not even just my life, just shit that's going on. And no, it's not politically charged or anything like that. I know nothing about politics, I am dumb on that but I'd rather learn about things as they come instead of have someone tell me.
Speaker 1:So, whatever I read or find interesting, I'm going to share with you guys and, like I said, no regrets on anything, and you shouldn't have any regrets either. Anybody listening. We're starting a new year. It's 2025. Let's make this year a good one. We're going to keep going with these episodes. We're going to keep talking about whatever you want Anything, I see that I think is funny. I'm obviously going to share. I just have to keep remembering to take notes, but I will be back next week.
Speaker 1:Sorry, this was a short episode this week. I'm just tired, don't really have much to write and I'm really trying to, like, wrestle with the idea of mortality and what it means and you know, coming to terms with certain things and fighting like hell for other things. So, um, hopefully I'll have something better for next week and no regrets 2025. Um, ooh, also one last thing getting a tattoo this weekend. Um, I'll post pictures somewhere, so it'll be cool. I hope and I'm just excited overall for that to see the tattoo dude, because for some reason, it is true what they say, that after you get one, you want more, because I surely do want more. But thank you so much for listening guys. Love you guys as always, and I hope you have a wonderful rest of your week and be fabulous at everything you do in life. Love you guys. Bye, thank you.
