I also had to advocate for myself on what I needed. 
Traveling solo has also taught me to have a plan but not be surprised if the unexpected came along. 
Having a strong support system isn't a bad thing, but it's also important to know how I can do things on my own. 
Going on this trip gave me the confidence and resilience that I needed within myself. 
Welcome to Wild Development Studio. 
Studio. Join us as we venture into the breathtaking realm of wildlife arts and untamed adventures. 
With captivating stories from the field and ideas to dive into the visual arts, 
we'll ignite your passion for conservation. 
Get ready to develop something wild. 
Welcome to Wild Developments. 
I am your guide, Lauren. 
On today's episode, we are joined by. 
Michelle Steiner, a disability advocate, writer, and paraeducator with a passion for helping others navigate life with disabilities. 
Michelle has shared her experiences through articles on platforms like the Mighty Dyscalculia blog and Word Gathering, 
and recently started her own blog. 
Michelle's Mission. She also expresses her creativity through photography, with her work featured in Word Gathering, 
Independent, and Work Ready. 
In addition to her advocacy and artistic endeavors, Michelle works closely with students with disabilities as a paraeducator. 
Today, she'll share her journey of overcoming the challenges of living with a learning disability disability, 
her love for butterflies and flowers, and how faith in God and support from family and friends have shaped her path. 
Michelle, thank you so much for being here today. 
Oh, thank you so much for having me, Lauren. 
Can you tell us a little bit about your background and what you do? 
Well, my name is Michelle Steiner. 
I live in Pennsylvania with my husband, Ron, and our two. 
Two Cats, Jack and Sparrow. 
I'm a paraeducator in a school. 
And I also have a blog called Michelle's. 
Mission, where I write about life with a learning disability and feature my photography as well. 
So you write a blog about learning disabilities. 
I'm assuming that you have a learning disability? 
Yes. And I have a learning disability myself. 
Yes. I have dyscalculia, which is a math -based learning disability I have limited hand dexterity in both of my hands and visual perception issues so is this something that you've had your entire life and yes I was diagnosed with having one whenever I was in kindergarten my kindergarten teacher saw that I was really excuse me struggling with math and tying my shoes and counting and dot to dot pages and she recommended that I get tested for having a learning disability and sure enough I definitely have one and I had to repeat kindergarten the following year and I began to receive specialty services as well. 
So do you remember that time in your life and thinking like before the diagnosis and after the diagnosis what was that like for you? 
I remember very little before my diagnosis because I was so young but. 
But I can remember in the very beginning, when I was diagnosed, I just remember feeling really frustrated. 
I thought that everything was always going to be really hard and having a disability was going to stand in the way of every dream that I had. 
And I just wanted to learn like my peers did. 
And I also wanted to be accepted by them. 
And it just seemed like that nothing was working. 
And I just was really discouraged when I was younger. 
Longer. 
Do you feel that it held you back from your dreams at all? 
Are you able to, to cope? 
A lot of times, you know what, I found a way around that. 
And that was something that really concerned me because I remember I knew that I wanted to go to college and I knew that I wanted to work with kids, 
but I was afraid because I thought, okay, I'm, I have this disability. 
How especially since I was in all regular ed classes except for math and resource, 
and I wasn't alone in that. 
I had a learning support teacher who told me that I would never be able to do college because she thought that with my math, 
I couldn't do it, and she recommended a trade school, but none of the programs there interested me, 
so I got connected with an agency called Office for vocational rehabilitation and they recommended going to community college and i had to get tested for having a learning disability all over again and i can remember i've never been a great test taker and the psychiatrist who evaluated me said that i was most likely not going to go beyond a community college. 
And then I get to community college and I still had more stigma surrounding it. 
A lot of people didn't thought that using disability accommodations was cheating or giving me an unfair advantage. 
And I had a professor that told me, well, I think you're going to have limited job choices because of your disability. 
So I didn't use the services, big mistake, day because my grades really dropped at that point. 
And I was just really frustrated. 
And I can remember I was struggling in a class and a professor that was outside of my department said, 
why don't we at least get you extended test time? 
And I can remember that I was able to pass her class after using those services. 
I did not do well in that, but I was able to graduate and get my associate's degree in early childhood education. 
And I moved out on my own, which was was really good because I'm not able to drive because of my disability. 
So I had that independence and I was enjoying life. 
I was working and I was just being independent. 
And I, for financial reasons, I had to move back with my parents and I always wanted more for myself. 
And when I was with my parents, I thought this is the golden opportunity to go back to school. 
And my job was downsizing. 
I found a program at university that had the least amount of math and science possible, 
and it had disability accommodations, and I had a ride to go to school, 
and when I got there, I used the services provided. 
I had a note taker. 
I had extended test time, and I advocated for myself, and it was so much better. 
I was able to get my bachelor's degree despite being told I I couldn't do it. 
And I made Dean's List for a semester. 
And that was really good. 
After that point, I was not as negative as I once was about it. 
And that has helped me. 
And it also has helped me with writing about it as well. 
I can remember I had some issues whenever I was in school socially, 
and I found an adult writing group. 
And they told me, you should really write about about having a learning disability. 
And I think I wrote some bad poetry and some other stuff for a number of years. 
But when I finally got that courage to write about having my struggle with limited hand dexterity and opening up doors, 
then that is one of the other most healing things that I've ever done. 
And it helped me to be encouraged me to write other articles and to start my own blog. 
That's fantastic. I love that when people told you that you couldn't do it, 
you figured out a way to do it and you excelled in it. 
It was what it sounds like. 
How do you keep such a positive attitude and keep putting one step in front of the other to accomplish your dreams despite people in quote -unquote places of authority telling you that you can't? 
I think what really helps me is focusing on what I can do and what I love to do. 
I love to read, I love to write. 
I love to share my story. 
And I love to take pictures on my walks. 
And I could be upset if I focus on the things I can't do, 
like math or not being able to drive, then I'm not happy and I'm more negative. 
But if I just keep my focus on that, then that helps me, 
helps my mindset. 
Another thing is with taking pictures. 
I have noticed that if I sit in the the drive from sitting in the passenger seat I'm able to notice details that other people will miss and I'll ask my husband we'll be in the car and I'll say did you see that and he said no I'm focused on driving and he's getting a little bit better about that because he hears that but I get that chance later when I'm on a walk to take a picture of a beautiful flower or a butterfly and if I was driving then I wouldn't be able to stop and smell the roses and take a beautiful picture. 
Literally stop and smell the roses. 
I did notice on your website you've got a lot of beautiful florals and even behind you as we're talking you've got a beautiful floral picture. 
What is it about flowers and butterflies that you are so attracted to? 
What I always love is the color and I also love the process that they go through. 
I love to watch a flower bloom and a lot a lot of that process in nature is similar to how I bloomed. 
So I started out as a small seed that nobody thought was ever going to go and develop into anything else. 
And I've been able to do a lot with that. 
And I also love butterflies, that transformation process that they go through. 
One summer, we accidentally had a caterpillar that came into our house, some flowers from our garden. 
And I got to watch that process of a monarch butterfly. 
Just all those transformations and release them and every year now we get a butterfly kit we haven't been fortunate to get one on our flowers but and we get to see that process and that transformation from those caterpillars to a butterfly and I can just look at my own journey and find so many similarities to that that's beautiful do you guys tag your monarchs at all um no but yes i i have seen people who have done that yeah we we did that this past summer and during that time i was going through a lot of personal changes and i found that watching that transformation from the caterpillar to the chrysalis to a butterfly that was really healing in my journey so i told i can relate to that yes they're beautiful animals um um your photography in the dexterity how does that affect your photography at all I think that somewhat a little bit with the dexterity but not as much I mean I'm able to sometimes I have to wait and I have to wait for something to come into focus and then I have to kind of just kind of uh be mindful when I have the camera and I'm holding it and sometimes yeah you my fingers might just might be a little bit hard to manage but I can do that the thing that I'm not able to do with my fingers is unlock doors that is definitely one of the things I can't that I really struggle with objects will also fall out of my hands and I'm not able to use a manual key and opener I have to use an electric one and we have jar openers but for some reason photography. 
Photography just comes to that a lot easier than other things. 
Well, it's great that you found that. 
And then people can go to your website and purchase prints of the beautiful flowers. 
And also, did you design the journals that are on there too? 
I did. 
Do you like the process of journaling? 
Is that something that you do? 
Yes, I love to journal. 
I find that that gives me my voice. 
Whenever I get to write, that is my voice. 
I can remember when I was really young, my dad found a story about a dinosaur that I wrote about. 
And he said, wow, this is really good. 
And I was really amazed because I didn't think before that there was anything I was good at. 
Everything just seemed to be really hard for me. 
And that just encouraged me to write. 
And the writing and the reading took me to another world whenever I was being bullied or just life got really hard. 
And one thing I noticed whenever whenever I was an adult, there was people that I couldn't forgive. 
But if I would write in my journal, or I create a story with that character, 
and I got to say what I wanted to that person, I could forgive that person because I had a voice. 
And I think sometimes that's really powerful, especially with having a hidden disability, 
is being able to have a voice because a lot of people look at me and they can't see the disability. 
But I can write about it and and express how I feel. 
And that's just so freeing to me. 
That's amazing. I'm a nature journalist. 
So John Muir Laws, he teaches nature journaling and he talks a lot about how getting it onto paper, 
like it's hard for us to, to figure things out in our brain, 
but getting it onto paper helps us to organize and, and think of our thoughts in a different way. 
And like you say, it gives you your voice. 
Did you find that through your writing that you've helped other people in their own struggles I have had people that have told me that's my story that's something I struggle with and I thought I was the only person who struggled with it and when I hear that that helps me encourages me to write more and also it just is something that um just have helps that connection with other people that have disabilities that's beautiful I forget who said the quote but telling a story could be somebody else's survival plan just hearing what what you have to say that's so amazing you know we talked a little bit before the recording and i know that you traveled alone and when you told me just a few minutes ago that turning a lock is a struggle for you i well first of all how did you travel alone and i'm my first thought is as a woman alone alone. 
Not being able to lock a hotel door room terrifies me. 
So how were you able to accomplish that? 
Well, part of it was I was meeting a friend, I was meeting someone that I work with. 
But I had to travel to Florida for a Down syndrome convention by myself, 
I had to fly out. 
And I've always gone on with my husband, we love to travel and go places together. 
And I've not experienced flyer by. 
By any means, this was my first time, my second time on an airplane and my first time alone. 
And I knew there was going to be some challenges going into it. 
So one of the first things we did was I had a flight ambassador at the airport to walk me through going through different places because I can get lost very easily and trying to process information can be really hard. 
And I also had what is called a sunflower lanyard with the hidden sunflower program. 
And what that is, is it's a lanyard that shows hidden disabilities. 
And when you wear it, people who know will know that that person might just need a little extra time or maybe a little extra patience, 
maybe some or some additional assistance. 
Assistance. And using those two programs was wonderful. 
I was able to be able to have someone help me go through the airport because of course you're nervous. 
It's a little, especially with not being used to travel alone. 
And I also talked to the airline. 
I was able to get pre -boarding and that helped out tremendously. 
There was some, another woman in our group that was going to the the same place that had a child with Down syndrome and she didn't know about any of the programs and when our flight was full and she got on it was one of the last groups to get on and they would not let her and her son sit together nobody would give up their seats and I didn't see that if I saw that I would have given up a seat so they could do that and by the end of that we talked to her and she was in pre -boarding for me on the way home so I thought that it's so important to know that but I met my friend and she was able to pick me up and we had the thank goodness they didn't have the keys that you have to lock I mean it was just the swipe card which helps out a little bit sometimes they can be a little difficult with that but I was able to do that. 
And it just made the trip a lot easier for me. 
And I don't think it would have been as easy if I wouldn't have used them. 
And also ease the fears of my family. 
My mom was concerned. 
She's like, Oh, how are you going to do this? 
And I'm worried about you. 
You know, I'm going to worry about you when I'm 100years old, 
I won't be here, but I'm going to worry about you. 
And my dad was telling me not to talk to strangers and it just it eased their fears it eased my fears and it just made the trip possible so a little bit more about the hidden is it called the hidden sunflower lanyard yes so it's got sunflowers on the lanyard does it have like a card or anything yes it has a a card it has a card on there too and it yeah it'll say hidden sunflower or yeah I believe that's what it said yep that is really cool when you were traveling where did a lot of people like I would assume the average Joe might not know what that is but were airplane workers and stewardess were they kind of familiar with that some people were now it was a new program for pittsburgh international airport so when i went through tsa with my flight ambassador they had me take it off and she was even surprised but that's what we did and then i put it back on and she explained it was a new program but uh the airline knew what it was i mean they were okay with everything i mean with just getting everything uh that i needed for pre -boarding the stewardess were wonderful they if I showed them that they did that and I was really lucky that I sat beside on both my flight to my destination on the way home some wonderful older women that understood and they the one lady talked to me and then she said oh do you need help with your bag and they helped me get my my drink and everything too and I thought that was just so nice of them a lot of the older generation but yeah I was one of the only people that was in the airport that had it on and it was just mainly for a safety thing but a lot of and then on the way home when the airport that this was a new program I don't know if the flight ambassador informed them but I was trying to find my way to go meet my husband at the baggage claim and they were like oh do you need help do you need us to show you where to go and everything so they were a lot more helpful once a lot of people were aware of it. 
That's fantastic because a lot of things that people struggle with, I have ADHD, 
I have dyslexia, and there have been two of my guests that I have completely misspelled their name. 
And it is so embarrassing. 
I'm like, it is not from a lack of respect. 
It's just something that I personally struggle with, but you know, doesn't know by by looking at another person, 
what are some ways that we can advocate for this lanyard and make people more aware of it? 
I think a lot of times it's just sharing that resource with other people too, 
because a lot of people don't know about it. 
I was able to write an article that got published in Public Source and it explained about the program. 
I think it's also through social media, sharing things about that and just talking and informing people that and letting airports know that to implement this program and the nice thing about it too is it's free you don't have to pay anything for the lanyard and you don't have to provide any documentation with that you just have to simply ask for it so I think it's airports just pointing people in the right direction and just thinking okay would you like to have one of these because I talked to somebody that they didn't know about the program and then they have autism and they were having some issues whenever they were coming in at um in one of the airports and somebody said oh here's a sunflower lanyard or would you like one of these and they they didn't know that's fantastic and would you travel again with your lanyard yes I would definitely my husband and I even said if we travel again even if it's together preferably I would still have my lanyard on in case somehow we got separated or something happened so at least I would have that so somebody could know and we could be able to be assistants to me do you have any trips planned I think we're just going to be doing some day trips coming up and yeah for for this summer but hopefully next year we'll do some traveling again that's great um i love that you love flowers so much and you take pictures of flowers and that the lanyard that you use has a sunflower on it yes on the connection there do you have a favorite spot in nature that you like to visit it? 
One of our favorite places, we like to go to Phipps Conservancy in Pittsburgh. 
That's one of our favorite botanical gardens we like to go to. 
I just love the different displays that they have every year and just seeing all the different flowers that bloom. 
But we like to go to a lot of botanical gardens too and just be able to be in nature. 
And I think my favorite is whenever the the flowers, the butterflies start to come out. 
I love going to a nice butterfly garden. 
And another favorite that we did years ago was we went to Wickham Park in Connecticut and it was around fall in New England and we were just seeing all the red maples and just all the different gardens and it was just so beautiful. 
Do you have a particular particular blog article you'd like to share sure I can just yeah I can share one hold on one sec the in this article this was just that it was in August because I did a whole thing on traveling and um I did travel has always been one of my favorite activities I love exploring new destinations and have many spots that are my favorite places I've traveled with family friends of my husband where we made many treasured memories. 
I've traveled mainly with people who knew me and knew the needs of my disability. 
Having another person that understood me helps me to process information and navigate places. 
Recently, I had an unexpected invitation to help at a Down syndrome conference. 
My husband was not able to make it and I traveled solo to meet with the group. 
I was so excited to go on the trip, but anxious as well. 
I wondered how I would navigate the journey to the airport and process information. 
The opportunity was too good to pass up on, and I decided to go forward on this journey. 
To make this trip successful, I had to plan, advocate for myself, and be flexible with changing circumstances. 
The research was the most important element for preparing the trip. 
I researched the services available for people with disabilities at the airport. 
I also searched for information on the area we would be visiting, the venue for the conference and the hotel. 
I also watched videos with my husband on airports that I'd be visiting and had the chance to see what they looked like. 
I also had the chance to learn the steps of operations such as checking in, 
boarding security, and boarding the plane. 
Researching helped to give me an idea of what to expect and how to handle the situation. 
Advocating for myself was another important part of making this trip run smoothly. 
When I was by myself at the airport, I needed to speak up for myself. 
If I didn't know something that was in an unfamiliar location, I had to ask. 
When the directions were unclear, I had to ask for clarification. 
Processing information and following the instructions is difficult for me to comprehend. 
When I did not get a successful resolution, I had to try yet again. 
Many people were friendly and helpful. 
It was my job to speak speak up for myself. 
Another part of traveling was learning to be flexible with events that did not go as planned. 
Despite planning and speaking up for my needs, certain situations were beyond my control. 
I could not control the weather delaying the flight home or other changes in the plane that occurred. 
The only thing I could do in those situations beyond my control was pray, 
breathe, and find ways to distract myself. 
I found that this was the perfect time to read a good book or have a conversation with another passenger to distract me. 
It was fine to go in with a plan, but there may be changes that I had to adapt to. 
Going on this solo trip has caused me to stretch myself in different ways. 
I prepared by looking to see what resources were out there for me. 
I also had to advocate for myself on what I needed. 
Traveling solo has also taught me to have a plan, but not be surprised if the unexpected came along. 
I also realized that I had to appreciate my support system when traveling. 
I didn't realize how much I depended on the support of others before traveling alone. 
So having a strong support system isn't a bad thing, but it's also important to know how I can do things on my own. 
Going on this trip gave me the confidence and resilience that I needed within myself. 
How do you advocate for yourself? 
Because that can be, I do not like to muddy the waters and I like to go with the flow. 
And sometimes it feels like speaking up for yourself might upset somebody. 
So how do you stay strong and advocate for yourself? 
Advocating is a skill that I've had to learn how to do. 
I have to go in and know what the situation is beforehand. 
A lot of people say you're really good at saying what the problem is. 
And I'll go up to the right person. 
I'll find out who that person is that I need to speak with. 
With and I'll make sure that I can do this in a calm, 
rational voice and I'll just explain the situation that I have a disability and this is what I, 
the stuff, things that I need to do and usually I get a really good response. 
Mostly people are more than willing to help or do what they can and I have to kind of go with the results of whatever the situation is and if that person can't help me, 
then sometimes I have to find somebody else that can or another way. 
And I just think that's just so important. 
And that's something that is, when you have a disability, it's very important to know how to speak up for yourself in a nice, 
respectful way. 
That part can be a struggle sometimes too. 
I agree. I think when I started out, I was yelling more and I didn't know how to put things in that that way. 
And that took a long time and practice. 
Practice. That's good to know. 
So what is next for Michelle? 
What, do you have any big plans? 
I just want to be able to be able to expand my blog and be able to share my story and just be able to connect and help other people with disabilities. 
And I also want to travel more and just go out there and explore and whatever it is, 
I don't want to have my disability get in the way would you ever write a book I would like to do that in the future definitely good good I'm sure a lot of people would look up to you and use you as a guiding light to help them um figure out how to navigate the world in a way um that works for them so how can people find you you can find me at my blog michellesmission .net and I'm on facebook and instagram as well perfect and before we go what is one tip you have for someone that would like to connect with nature people to just be able to go out and find what they like and be able to go out there and maybe you you're somebody that wants to go out with your nature with your journal and sit outside or maybe you like to go out and sit on your porch swing with a good book or a cup of tea and just find what you like and and just uh give it a try beautiful advice oh what is your favorite flower my favorite flower or my favorite flowers are lilacs i always love them yeah beautiful all right well thank you so much and until next time get outside and see what develops thanks for joining wild development studio we hope this exploration into the world of wildlife arts and adventure has sparked a desire to get outside and connect with something wild. 
If you have an adventure that's awe -inspiring, don't hesitate to share. 
Click the link in the description to submit your story to have it featured on our show or be a guest. 
Until next time, keep connecting to the wild and see what develops. 
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